Lover doesn't call for a week. A married lover does not write, does not call, does not make appointments Why a married lover does not call
Many women sincerely do not understand why a lover calls less and less.Or in general from the very beginning there were no frequent calls.What's the matter?they wonder.Any conversation about human relationships requires sincere questions andtruthfulanswersespecially when it comes to love. You don't think that love corresponds only to a stamp in the passport and blossoms under Mendelssohn's waltz, do you? Love is like a simple stray flower on a city street: it can grow anywhere and on anything.There are, of course, cold selfish predators who prudently arrange themselves as mistresses of rich men, but there are not so many of them, believe me. There are many more normal women in need of love who are just unlucky becauseHE already married. He just met his wife earlier, that's all. And you can’t do anything here, and it’s useless to look for the guilty. Is it man's fault that he took a mistress? It's like looking.From the point of view of his wife, he is a bastard and a traitor to her love. And from the point of view of her husband, she herself is to blame for the fact that there has been no love for a long time. It is not for nothing that all the men who go to the left sing the same song: that there are no relations anymore, that at home, as in a grave, and with their wife they have not slept together for a hundred years.And the woman he came to believes because she wants to believe it. 'Cause she needs to believe thatto himreally Badly.It means he really needs her. Only a prostitute will serve anyone, and a normal woman will never let a man into her bed who comes to her and says: “You know, lapul, something is so bad for me today! In principle, I don’t care who I sleep with, but I can sleep with you. The wife got it just already; Do you have anything to drink?" Firstly, a man is not a fool and understands what can be said and what is not. And, secondly, why can't he fall in love? Maybe even like that - and here's a classic love triangle for you.Well, and why HE does not call?It would seem that if he walks, then he loves. He himself chose, he proposed, and he himself does not call. You are waiting and it is not clear to you ... But everything is clear to me, absolutely. Now I will explain to you what the matter is - and everything will become clear to you too.Youjust "think in the wrong direction."The biggest mistake is thoughts like: “what does he mean by this” and “I don’t understand what kind of game he is playing with me.” He does not want to say anything, and even more so does not play any game. Women's stereotypes are not mounted in the male consciousness, so throw these womanish thoughts out of your head. He just did everything he wanted to do. And you, by the way, too, but not completely. Did he offer you a relationship? Offered. Did you accept them? Yes. Did you know that a lover is a road to nowhere? Certainly.And yet they agreed.Because you are not made of stone, because you wanted love and happiness and so on. As a result, these very relationships of yours arose and developed.You want more, but he doesn't:he already has everything. He has a wife, in case of good weather, and a mistress, in case of bad weather (when the wife gets very hard). Moreover, I’ll tell you the bitter truth, since we agreed: since he “turned you on”, everything has improved at his house. This is where the saying “A good leftist makes a marriage strong” comes from. He now treats his wife condescendingly (guilty!), And does not quarrel with her at all. And she, feeling something was wrong,tried to understand him better.and less nit-picking. There's just one thing they both forgot:thank you for this.And another big question is, do you burden him with your problems: he is tired of them at home, why does he need a second set? And you thought that on the waves of love you would sail to a beautiful island, where there would be no wife anymore, he only had to compare both of you and seehow much better are you?Everything is much simpler: he sincerely considers you a beautiful woman who deserves happiness, but he already gave you everything he wanted to give, and he already took everything he wanted to take.And, if he felt so terrible and unbearable at home, he would have left long ago, especially since there is where. For example, to you. But he doesn't leave. No, don't think about love, he doesn't lie to you, he really loves you. Only you are ready to give him all of yourself and forever. And he is only a part of himself and for a while. So it’s not fair, you are suffering ... And he, imagine, does not want to suffer anymore: this is not why he started all this. It is comfortable and pleasant for him to know that someone loves him and is waiting for him; and will always accept.So, why should he leave?To then run from you to your mistress? These are the cases, and you are here with calls, it’s even funny ...He just. one can say that he behaves honestly: once again he doesn’t bother you with himself.If he wants to see, he will call. But he is no longer a boy, and you are not a girl either: the time of the first love fever has long passed. So make a decision: endure further, or you part with him, so as not to be a fallback; or urgently looking for someone else and struggling to get married. I only beg youNotin order to take revenge.Here, they say, you didn’t call me, and then you call, and I’ll say, “But I got married!” He will not fall dead, pierced by terrible news, he will simply become a little unpleasant and very easy, that's all. You will not punish him with this, but if you marry anyone, you will punish myself. That's how I got my revenge!And don’t arrange any heart-to-heart talk either, a man belongs to them. as to a visit to the dentist: endures. but avoids. Like, "you haven't called for a long time, I don't know how you feel about me." You won't hear anything except that he loves you. Therefore, absorb literally every word of what you read, think carefully and make a decision,should you continue to wait for his call as much as before, or forget about your “great love” for a while and find yourself one. who will look impatiently at the phone and wait YOUR HIS call.
Good afternoon. The situation is this. Two years ago, I began a correspondence with a stranger. I did not know his name and did not see the photo, but nevertheless we communicated well. The topics for discussion were different. This went on for exactly a year, when he offered to show himself. After we met and for a year we have been lovers. He has a family, I have no one but children. I fell in love with him very much and he knows it. We rarely meet, but the correspondence is constant. Recently, we often swear, take offense at each other. I demand more attention and care from him, he says that he cannot give me this. Although he wants to keep in touch with me, he wants to see me. He constantly demands some kind of truth from me, says that I should change, change my attitude towards him - although I run like a dog at his first call, make different romances, give gifts, but in return I get nothing but sex. This greatly torments me. I'm desperate.
I tried to part with him, for two weeks I did not answer his SMS and calls. But he himself came to me at work and everything started again. I have very strong feelings for him, and he says that he is very attached to me, even jealous. I'm not going to take him away from the family, I don't need it. But I want to be with him. I don’t know what to do to prove to him that he is no worse than his wife and also worthy of attention and care. Can you tell me what to do in this situation? I tormented myself with thoughts....
Hello Irina.
Let's try to briefly describe the situation.
You are in love with a married man. Want more attention from him. You don't want to leave your family. He is attached to you, he is not ready to give as much attention as you need. Ready to have sex. He speaks directly about this. You, however, do not seem to believe him and continue to demand the attention and care that he has already refused to give you. He, for his part, is not satisfied with your attitude towards himself.
I don’t know what to do to prove to him that he is no worse than his wife and also worthy of attention and care.
Try to answer yourself the question, how do you understand that he considers you worse than his wife, what will change, why do you think that he considers you unworthy of attention and care? Because it does not give this attention? There could be many other explanations for this. For example, he cannot, does not want, has no strength and opportunity to give it to two women, and he chooses to give attention only to his wife. This does not mean that you are not worthy of attention. This suggests that it is this man who chooses not to take care of you, or for some other reason makes a choice: not to give you as much attention as you need.
Can it be that you yourself, deep down, are not very sure that you are worthy of being the only one, worthy of love, care and attention. Then by trying to prove something to him, are you really proving to yourself?
What do you feel when you think about it? Are you ready to continue the relationship without getting something important for you in them? If yes, if you're getting something else that's more important than attention, that's a perfectly understandable choice... But if not, then what keeps you in a relationship that isn't right for you?
I tried to part with him, for two weeks I did not answer his SMS and calls. but he himself came to my work and everything started again.
Do you want to leave or not? It's just that if you made a decision, and this is your conscious choice, then a visit to work is usually not enough for a reunion ...
You may need professional help to sort yourself out.
If necessary, please contact me for a consultation. I will be glad to help you.
Sincerely, psychologist,
Makarova Lola.
No matter how much women would like to have a faithful and devoted spouse, statistics show the opposite: 76% of husbands have cheated on their wives at least once. At the same time, most of them admitted that they had a mistress on the side only to satisfy their sexual needs, and they themselves consider their marriage successful and are not going to get divorced. They did not even remember the name of their mistress and were not going to call her after the first intimacy.
The position of the mistress in the triangle "wife-husband-lover" is the most difficult. Not only that, everyone condemns her as " homeowner“So she still has to wait all the time for her beloved man, not even being able to call him to find out where he is now and why he disappeared?
It is extremely rare that men leave their wives and children for a mistress, most often they are looking for a soulful girlfriend or a sexually attractive woman on the side to satisfy their needs. There is a category of men who earn a lot of money and want to feel the power they give. To understand this, they seduce gullible and inexperienced girls with expensive gifts and tempting offers, and they don’t even think about leaving their family for their sake. Hence the conclusion: the relationship with married men most often doomed to failure.
Other interesting articles
Source:
Lover doesn't call for a week
Why doesn't the lover call? Love triangle: wife-husband-mistress
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Sergey Kalmov
In life, everything is not as it really is.
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So I called my new series of articles dedicated to the variety of types and forms of manifestation of love. Today the first article of the series is published, it is n.
What does it mean to "let your husband go" when he has a mistress?
And this is when a husband is eager to live with his mistress, but something is wrinkled, then his wife “lets go” to her. To live with his beloved tightly, in a family way, so that at home he doesn’t callous his eyes and doesn’t spoil the view with his sad face!
At the same time, some wives let go to return, and some just let go, realizing that they may not return. They don’t file for divorce during these “vacations”, they wait and hope.
Sometimes a wife, having lived alone already, does not want to accept her cheating husband back. But basically, after about a month, wives start looking for ways to "get their husband back."
a variation of "let go of the husband" is "to expel the husband to his mistress." About everything is the same, only the husband was not going to go anywhere, and his wife simply kicked him out of the house. With this option, it happens that the husband leaves not for his mistress, but for a friend or parents, or even leaves for another city and starts a new life there.
If a man does not want to get a divorce, while not living with his wife for a long time?
The answer is that he is so good. Divorce, division of property, hassle. why, when he is actually a bachelor anyway? I suppose he uses the joint property as in marriage?
If you need a divorce, why ask him about your desire? Or you hope that since you don’t want a divorce, that means. LOVES!
Yes, of course he loves it. He only lives with his mistress, but otherwise he is full of the most tender feelings for you!
How does a long relationship of lovers end?
Most often, long-term relationships fade slowly. If both lovers are already tired of them, it happens smoothly and smoothly, and if one still feels feelings, then longer, because one of the lovers with all his might inflates the dying fire and diligently throws firewood into it.
But one day she) he) will ask herself: if he (she) does not need it, then why am I trying? And relationships die a natural death.
For according to the law of Nature, everything that once began will surely end sometime.
How do you know if your lover has left you?
That is? He does not answer calls and letters, does not come, in general does not show not only interest in your direction, but also signs of life - and at the same time: “how to understand whether he quit or not?”
Really, maybe I just forgot?
Here, somewhere, a woman wrote that she meets her lover once a year, here, yes, if he misses one year, it’s not clear whether he quit or was just busy and didn’t come
She left her lover, but he does not believe!
And how can he believe if you continue to have sex with him when he comes to you, and he comes to you as usual!
And now, after sex, every time you say: this was the last time, I'm leaving you, goodbye forever! And then he comes again and the whole cycle repeats again!
You don't leave your lover, you just talk about it. And he is right that he believes his penis, which you are always welcome, and not your empty words!
How can you not come back after leaving your lover?
And it's all about feelings. Even one habit (not to mention stronger feelings) is enough to be drawn and attracted to a lover.
Leaving a lover is not a hard decision, and a one-time effort is a process.
For some time you need to hold on, and for some - to hold on with all your might, so that they would not return to him.
Cut off all contact with your lover, do not answer his calls, try not to return your thoughts to him again and again, visit people more often, have fun with friends and girlfriends, and endure, endure, endure.
How to tell your lover about the breakup: by phone or SMS?
In person. If this is not possible, please call. SMS for such an event is not at all suitable.
How to deal with my husband if he does not want to communicate with me?
And what difference does it make how you puff yourself up with him if he doesn’t even want to communicate with you? He does not love you, does not respect you, your marriage will actually end, and soon it may be formal. That's where the problem is, and not at all in your behavior.
And only when everything came to an end, you thought about your behavior and attitude towards your husband. Isn't it too late? On the other hand, while everything in the marriage was good, there was no need for any artificial behavior. One way or another, but by behavior you will not fix anything already. Too late for that.
She left her lover, but he does not call?
So you just left him in order to start calling? but he doesn't know that! He rests himself from you and rejoices at an unexpected gift!
And how many do not call then already? I must have found someone else! It turned out slick! But they really managed to quit, otherwise some are very much tormented by this “throwing of a lover”. They can't quit for years! And you have an easy hand in this matter!
How to leave a married lover more painfully?
Breaking up can only hurt someone who loves you. And your lover doesn’t give a damn about you, in fact, he left you a long time ago, so don’t strain yourself, but try to really part with him this time, so much so that it doesn’t work out for you.
Why did the lover leave in English?
Eka You turned down "in English!". It sounds noble, romantically reminiscent of old traditions and good upbringing! Bravo!
But in fact, he didn’t give a damn about you and stopped communicating, cutting off all contacts. He didn't even bother to explain. Used and discarded. Why did he kick you out like that? And he's more comfortable. Throw it away and you in response. From head, soul and heart.
Lover has not called for 2 weeks. Should I wait for his call?
You should just forget about this lover. Wait two weeks, then two months, then two years. what to expect, because it is clear that he left you. Well, he treated you well, since he didn’t even bother to notify about the break.
The husband went to his mistress, will he be happy?
Maybe it will, maybe it won't - in any case, this is not your concern! Now you have your own life, he has his own. Let him try to be happy with his mistress and let her head hurt whether he is good with her or not. And you need to look at your life. Will you be happy or not? Or will you still suffer from the syndrome of the departed husband?
The married man said, do you urgently need to be offended by me?
And, of course, he is going to leave you and wants to do it traditionally - through a quarrel. I've become attached to you, I can't just take it and disappear like that. Now, no matter how you turn it, quarrels cannot be avoided!
Was a mistress for 10 years - my lover left me?
It had to end somehow, and so it did. With such a long relationship, you can already safely not hope for marriage with your lover and calmly wait for him to leave you. Or throw him away. Moreover, she herself should be thrown for good, and much earlier this should be done, no later than after a couple of years of hopeless relationships. And then the former lover is now in chocolate, and you have aged 10 years and this is all that you received from this “love”.
My lover offers friendship?
“The ball is over, the candles are out. »
Well, the relationship is over. And the offer of friendship - yes, what kind of friendship is there, so, a turn of speech. Leave and forget where you live. And then: Do you need a friend or a lover?
You have no choice, he will leave you anyway, and this is not an offer at all, but an announcement of a break in relations. Soon you will find out who he changed you to. Well, friendship - well, make friends for health!
If a man does not want to divorce his ex-wife?
Well, what kind of ex is she if he is not divorced from her? Moreover, she does not want to get divorced, which means she keeps in her head the possibility that she will return to her!
Do not console yourself with illusions, your lover is a married man, with all the ensuing consequences. And he did not leave his wife at all, but simply temporarily does not live with her.
The lover and his wife lived for 23 years. Will he leave her?
The age of marriage in these cases does not mean anything. And they live together for 50 years, but part.
You don’t need to take into account the age figure at all, here you need to look at what kind of man your lover is, what kind of relationship he has with his wife, with children, and sometimes with his parents, how he treats you, whether he is satisfied with you, whether he is determined or dependent from the decisions and opinions of other people and much more.
Well, since, firstly, a rare woman is able to take into account and link so many factors together, and secondly, she is rare and knows so much about her lover, then the mistresses dunk themselves with this expectation of “when will the beloved leave his wife for me ?!” for many years and all in vain.
Husband fell in love with a married woman and divorced?
Rare case. More often married mistresses divorce for the sake of their lover. Does that mean she's not divorced? It looks like your husband just wanted to be free, so he got divorced, and the mistress is only an excuse, not a reason.
Question to a psychologist
I've been dating a man for a little over a month. he is my married lover. My monthly rent from him is 100 thousand rubles. But our meetings are rare and he needs very little sex, almost no need at all (he himself says that he has a low libido). However, lately I feel that he is somehow consciously dynamite me. With what to connect it, I do not know. He says he’s afraid to sleep at home, but he used to call me in the evenings, and now he hardly even answers the mail. We have some common creativity with him, so once he set aside a whole night to discuss the details, and now he does not check the mail, where I sent him several finished works on this topic. I know that the very idea of this is very interesting to him. He says that he is busy a lot, but is it really so difficult to call for 5 minutes on the way home? All this confuses me somehow .. either he is really busy and this is normal for him, or he is draining me slowly. We meet every 5 days or so. Advise how to be. I do not want to lose my wonderful lover, who, moreover, I like as a man. It is also important to point out that he is a slightly strange creative person... Maybe he is playing some strange game with me in this way?
Hello Alena! You initially accepted the ROLE of a mistress - and this is a dead end relationship - a relationship in which there is NO responsibility, obligation! and HE builds relationships AS IT IS convenient for him - after all, you agreed to this secondary ROLE - and YOU can NOT do anything to keep him - because you can NOT make him feel WHAT YOU need! note for yourself - what is NORMAL FOR HIM - to cheat on his wife - to have a mistress, to support her! this is his relationship with you! and YOU accepted it - showed that you are ready to accept SUCH attitude towards yourself! like a mistress! and HE does AS HE needs! and if something does NOT suit YOU, THEN YOU SHOULD act, and DO NOT wait for changes FROM him! What do you expect from a relationship? why do you need them? what's next? What does he WANT? why is it HIM? talk to him and immediately put everything in its place! and you will make your own choice - either consciously accept the role of a mistress (and a kept woman) and show him that you accept such an attitude towards yourself OR get on your own feet and look for THAT partner who will have the same goals and plans in life as YOU ! and for YOU the most NORMAL to be a mistress?
Good answer 0 bad answer 2Alena, a mistress is made to be a holiday, a muse, an inspiration. You are generously paid for this role, and this suggests that you are a good lover. So be it.
Don't be jealous, don't bother with calls, be easy, interesting, sexy... friend, woman, creative partner. And no more. These are the basic rules of the game. If you are an interesting person, and he really feels good with you, he will not disappear anywhere, do not worry. But what a married man certainly does not need is problems with a mistress of the same circle as with his wife :)
Parting with a loved one is a severe psychological trauma, so it is not possible to return the relationship in a simple way. However, this does not mean that the relationship cannot be restored at all. First of all, it is worth analyzing everything, starting from the beginning of the relationship and the reasons that caused this relationship, and up to the moment preceding the breakup. It is desirable to determine objectively the share of guilt of each. After all, the reasons for relationships and motives are different, so you should ask who is a man for a woman - beloved, closest, without which she cannot imagine her life, or is it just a person who provides materially?
If a woman is only interested in the material part, then it will be better if she refuses these relationships, since one cannot expect good from them, especially if the object is married.
What is important for a man in a love relationship
Only psychology will help to return a loved one. It is very important to take into account that there is nothing unpredictable in the behavior of men, since each of them is primarily interested in himself and for him a positive assessment from the outside is very important, causing high self-esteem and asserting his own significance. This is exactly how a woman who ardently wants to return her beloved should see him, because she will easily understand what needs to be done for this.
A man's interest in a lady can be caused in three cases: if there is uncertainty, danger or intimacy.
The effect of emotions on relationships
With this in mind, a woman who wants to re-evoke a faded interest in an object of the opposite sex can initiate a meeting with him to discuss the existing relationship. But for this, she must take care of her appearance and have a good mood. Emphasizing her natural beauty with makeup, manicure, the lady should appear before the gaze of her beloved from her best side in all respects, because at the beginning of the meeting she was just like that. This should tell the young man that, having parted with him, the woman was not upset, did not lose heart, but became even more attractive. She should be cheerful and smile more often with a natural smile, because communication with her beloved is happiness for her, and light flirting will arouse his interest, which increases his sense of significance. A bright, attractive, dignified woman who still loves her former partner will certainly evoke mutual feelings in her beloved, and he will want to renew the relationship. In this case, psychology is the main assistant in the question of how to return a lover.
How to like again
So, in order to please your loved one again, you need to raise your self-esteem, become the most cheerful and best, the only one you always want to see, give her love and affection, the warmth of your soul. Become a lady with whom you will never be bored and will always have something to talk about, because she is interested in his problems and lives in his interests.
When communicating with a man, remembering the role psychology plays in their relationship, a lady should:
- raise your value in the eyes of a partner,
- demonstrate their value and importance,
- show your interest in the young person during the development of his interest,
- show a lack of interest at some point.
To return a loved one, you need to part properly
After analyzing her relationship with her partner, a woman can easily find a way to return her lover. The parting of partners can be both civilized and stormy, since the behavior of the lady is unpredictable - each of them sees the relationship in her own way. Some ladies cannot recover from parting for a long time and try to blame the man for everything, being offended and keeping their offense for a long time. Everything happens very quickly, on emotions that have very dangerous consequences. Consequences that can not be corrected later. It turns out that there are rules for the proper separation, which will help in the future to renew relations with a partner or ex-boyfriend quickly and even forever. Proper parting with a loved one gives this right to a woman.
First, a woman should never feel sorry for herself. Pity is a bad adviser. You just need to pretend that she is indifferent to parting, which will confuse the man and he may begin to doubt his indispensability and irresistibility. Male competition is a huge incentive. A careful hint that he is not the only contender for her heart will increase his doubts. In addition, after analyzing her relationship with her partner and determining the degree of their depth and significance, a woman can completely let go of a man, because he is not worth her further attention, and life goes on and sometimes it is just necessary to start it from scratch. However, if the situation is exactly the opposite, then the lady should find a way to return the relationship.
Coolness of relations is a guarantee of interest
In no case should a woman ask a young man about the true reason for ending a relationship, and even more so, not talk about a rival, ask her address and name. Lack of interest in the cause will surprise the partner, since his expectation of your negative reaction to the breakup will not follow. The psychology of a man is arranged in such a way that the hysteria of a woman and disassembly only strengthen his convictions in the correctness of the decision. After such a manifestation of emotions, the lady does not have a single chance of a return.
Time out or last night
You can offer your man to take a time out and for some time, specific, not to have a relationship. The reason may be fatigue from each other, and the woman, as it were, will express understanding of this, allowing the partner to think. In case of consent, the chance of a return to the relationship is great, since the decision to break up could be rash.
A fairly effective way to restore a relationship with a loved one is to offer to spend the last night with him. The lady has a chance to make the night unforgettable, showing all her advantages and virtues, showing her best sides of her beloved woman so that he is overcome by doubts about the correctness of the decision made. Thus, she will be able to return her beloved herself, without outside help and potions.
