Advantages and disadvantages of a small family. How to remain a personality in a large family - effective and time-tested rules of education in large families

“I want a family” - this desire sooner or later arises in the minds of almost all people. But is married life really that good, or is it better to stay single? If you still create a family, then how to prepare for this serious step? The publication will answer these questions.

Single life or family life?

For some, a bachelor's life is real bliss and freedom, for others it is only longing and fetters. Some people dream of finding peace and family comfort as soon as possible, while someone, on the contrary, strives not to tie themselves in marriage for a longer time. In most cases, the bachelor life attracts men, both young and mature. They can sincerely enjoy a free life until they feel the need to find a family.

Women, by their nature, tend to create comfort and home. They perceive the absence of a family in a negative way, especially if it has been absent for a long time. Therefore, it is quite normal if thoughts like “Will I get married” arise in a girl’s head. A rare woman will be sincerely glad of a bachelor life. Usually these include those who already have experience of marriage, and not the most successful. Therefore, they do not want to live together with the opposite sex or try to postpone this moment as long as possible.

That is, everyone chooses for himself how to live: free or married. Single life has its pros and cons. About them further and will be discussed.

Advantages of single life

The basis of a bachelor's life is freedom in all its forms and manifestations. Non-family people very fiercely protect her from encroachments of the opposite sex. The ability to do whatever you want in a single life is a major positive. The remaining pluses only follow from the concept of freedom.

This is a lot of free time, which you can dispose of only at your discretion.
The ability to manage finances the way you want.
Free choice of friends, which does not depend on the sympathies of the chosen one.
Gastronomic preferences are not controlled by anyone.
A varied sex life due to the constant change of sexual partners.
The dwelling can be furnished as you like, relying only on your vision of the interior.
You choose how and when to clean.
No need to adapt to someone, try to negotiate and seek compromises.
A bachelor has low responsibility: you feed, provide for and answer only for your loved one.
More opportunities to build a successful career that will bring high prosperity.
Less stress. No matter how good the relationship is, family life is a constant test of nerves for strength. Nobody bothers Bobyl to rest, sleep, and does not drip on the brain.

The positives are quite impressive. It is understandable why bachelors say: "I don't want a family." But there is a significant nuance here. All the charms of a carefree life can be fully experienced only from the age of 25-28. As a rule, by this age, both women and men live separately from their parents, become financially independent and sufficiently prepared to independently resolve domestic issues.

Disadvantages of single life

Usually, awareness of the negative aspects of a single life comes at those moments when a person is oversaturated with personal freedom. Then he begins to understand: "I want a family and children." Moreover, single life has its downsides.

Lack of psychological and physical support. A bachelor can rely in everything only on his own strength. This negative moment is especially acute when help is required for health reasons.
Independent housekeeping. This is the performance of traditionally female and male duties. Cleaning the apartment, cooking, moving heavy and bulky items, repairing plumbing, electrics, and so on.
Inconsistent sexual relations. Free people regularly have to look for a new partner, which can have a bad effect on libido. If the connections are random and unprotected, then there is a high probability of health problems.
Low social activity. Most bachelors aspire to nothing. The exception is self-care. It doesn't compare to how a married man or a married woman behaves. They help their extended family, start a garden or a dacha, go with their children to various interesting places where they communicate with new people. It makes purposeful and very developing.

Of course, one cannot categorically state that family life is a panacea for everyone, and bachelor life is selfish and immoral. A person should listen only to his feelings and act in accordance with them. It is silly to start a family just for the reason that it is due to age or all the acquaintances have already married. The decision to end the bachelor life must be conscious and sincere. Only in this case will it be comfortable in marriage.

Why can't you start a family?

What problems can you face? It happens that a person comes to the conclusion: “I want to get married / get married”, but for some reason cannot achieve this goal. Why is this happening? This can be explained by the following facts.

The most important reason is to create an ideal image of a partner. Moreover, a person may not even realize that he is not true. Everyone wants to be paired with smart, beautiful, rich, caring and so on. This is an abstract person with a certain set of traits and qualities that simply may not exist in reality. You need to descend from heaven and not wait for a prince or princess.

The second most popular reason is the lack of motivation and true desire. Yes, a person can say: “I want a family”, but in reality it is not so. He is simply based on the norms of society and what he sees around a lot of married couples. Therefore, it would seem that he also wants to become like that, although in fact there is no real desire. This situation often happens to women. Seeing how acquaintances create families, they begin to complain: “Will I get married someday?”

A bachelor can be hindered by his past. For example, there was already love in his life, but it ended in parting, although the feelings remained. Since then, other applicants are not recognized at all and are not considered for the role of a life partner.

Very often, some unfinished business or career interferes with starting a family. There is so much to do in life! Earn enough money, buy a car, an apartment, have time to travel. And this, of course, requires money and free time. Once these goals are achieved, it will be possible to start a family and children. So many people argue and risk not being in time.

Some people are prevented from creating a serious relationship by complexes, self-doubt, weakness of character and vulnerability. These subconscious qualities are programmed for an unsuccessful life in which there is no family happiness. In accordance with this, a person builds his behavior.

Sooner or later you start to think about how to start a family and what you need to do to get there. This will be discussed further.

Ask yourself questions

First of all, you should ask yourself why so far it has not been possible to start a family. You have to be completely honest with yourself and answer the question honestly. For clarity, the reasons can be written out on a piece of paper. For example, it can be fears, complexes or problems in the search.

It is also worth considering why you want to start a family. That is, you need to understand what exactly you expect from a relationship in marriage. All options that come to mind can be written down on a piece of paper. Answers in the style of “because relatives are pressing” or “it’s time for age” are an indicator of unpreparedness for a serious relationship. It's just a desire to conform to public opinion. If the intentions are sincere, then you need to try to eliminate the reasons why you can’t start a family. What step will be next?

love yourself

Some say: “I want to get married / get married”, but at the same time they do not like themselves. Who will love a man who does not love himself? If there are any complexes that interfere with starting a family, then you need to work with them. If there are problems in communicating with the opposite sex, then you need to attend psychological trainings. The figure can be adjusted with the help of sports and diets. Lack of repair or cooking skills will help correct the corresponding courses. That is, any problem can be solved.

Some are embarrassed by their appearance, although often this complex is far-fetched. But even if there are some problems with this, then it is worth taking a closer look at happy married couples. Not all of them have perfect looks. So that's not the point. A family is created with the person whose qualities correspond to their own expectations and values.

Revise the value system

Of course, one desire “I want a good family” will not be enough. It's just emotions. You need to be ready to get married. And this is the maturity of the individual. To create a family, you must have a certain system of values. If it is different, then it will have to be revised in order for the relationship to be successful. What to pay attention to before

Know how to express your feelings. This can be done not only with words, but with touches and glances. It is also important to confirm your love in deeds, and not just talk about it. The partner must feel that he is loved and important for his chosen one.
The ability to emotionally empathize with a partner. In marriage, it is important to be an empathic person. After all, who, if not a spouse, will provide support. It is necessary not only to listen about problems, but also to listen to them.
Consider the other person's opinion. In general, spouses are equal in rights. Everyone has their own desires and responsibilities. This must be taken into account when planning family life. A woman is not required to be a housekeeper, and a man is not required to be a "purse". All roles are assigned by mutual agreement. Household issues should be discussed in advance and a decision should be made jointly.
Be responsible. Starting a family is at least taking care of one more person. Therefore, you need to learn to be responsible not only for yourself, but also for him. You will also have to treat money differently. It will be necessary to plan the family budget, keep records of earnings and expenses, deny yourself something in order to have enough funds for more important things. It is very important that both spouses share responsibility for two, and not just someone pulling the strap.

Decide on the criteria for the chosen one

It is important to understand what kind of person you want to see next to you until the end of your days. To do this, you can make a list of preferred qualities. Appearance doesn't matter. It is necessary to indicate age, character traits, interests, skills and other features. Something without which it is impossible to build long-term relationships.

There is no need to hope that there will be a person who fully meets all the criteria. It is better to rank the list and, when choosing, rely only on the most significant qualities. For example, for someone it is very important that the partner loves children, and someone appreciates the similarity of hobbies. Everyone has their own preferences. Of course, the second half must also want to live in marriage. Otherwise, the statement “I want a family, get married (marry)” will simply be meaningless.

Search for a chosen one

You can’t dream of starting a family and not leaving the house anywhere. Spouse (s) will not fall from the ceiling. If there are only loners in the social circle, then you will have to make new acquaintances. You can visit restaurants, interest clubs, sports sections, theaters, city events and so on. But you don’t need to “go hunting” and each time hope that you will meet the same one. It is important to keep a sober mind and just enjoy life. For some, special dating sites will be the way out. They can significantly reduce the search time for the chosen one. But this method has its drawbacks. On the Internet, people often embellish their virtues and behave differently than in real life.

Don't rush things

When the search is completed, there is no need to rush and immediately stun the chosen one: “I want a family, let's go to the registry office as soon as possible!” This will only scare away, even if the person is not against marriage. Let the relationship develop gradually. Moreover, during this time you can get to know all the advantages and disadvantages of a potential spouse. You can think about a wedding only with full confidence that there is love, respect and compatibility. These are the foundations of family life, without which in any way.

Discuss family life

When the proposal is made, it is important to discuss with the partner all the nuances that are associated with cohabitation. In the future, this will help to avoid misunderstandings and major quarrels. It is worth deciding who will perform what duties, how finances will be distributed, how to raise children, what family traditions must be observed, and so on. You can discuss everything to the smallest detail, what comes to mind.

Preparing for family life is not at all a wedding celebration, outfits, a restaurant and a beautiful photo session. You need to learn to get along together, be responsible for others and respect your partner. Only in this case can you get a strong and happy family.

Sooner or later, a girl and a young man face a difficult choice whether to start a family or still enjoy a little more freedom. In order to make the right decision regarding this issue, it is necessary to determine advantages and disadvantages family life. Sometimes it happens that people can no longer feel lonely, but they feel morally unprepared to start a family and get married. What to do in such a situation? Undoubtedly, there are advantages and disadvantages in this position. If there was a choice between loneliness and family, then he would definitely fall on the second. Loneliness has a negative meaning. However, it is rather not freedom in this case, but the need to live in this way.

freedom of choice

Some understand loneliness as an opportunity for self-realization, that is, open spaces for doing what you want, without focusing or relying on anyone. Girls in this regard are in a winning position. For them, this approach means that there will be less hassle with household chores, cleaning, cooking, laundry. A young man does not need to constantly report where and with whom he was. That is advantages and disadvantages on the face. Not being ready to start a family does not mean complete loneliness. There are family, friends, acquaintances who are ready to support and keep company at any time. That is why it is a blessing for many. However, everyone has the right to choose the right path.

Important step

Not everyone will be able to dare to create a family. This is a serious and responsible step. First you need to think seriously, weigh everything advantages and disadvantages family life and ultimately come to the conclusion whether it is necessary for a young man or girl, or is it still worth postponing such a decision until better times. It is necessary to realize that now the responsibility will lie on the shoulders not only for their own well-being, but also for the well-being of close and dear people. For men, the creation of a family can be perceived as a burden, since it is not always possible for him to combine a career and at the same time be a family man. It's difficult. That is why young people should not rush into making a decision about a family, at least until they become independent and self-sufficient.

Happiness and harmony

Advantages and disadvantages family life can be very different. At present, it is quite rare to find a family in which complete harmony and understanding reigns. If, nevertheless, the couple decided to take such a responsible step, then they probably dream that married life will bring only positive emotions. However, no one can predict exactly how it will develop. Sometimes a girl and a young man realize too late that they made a mistake, never understanding what it means to experience true happiness from a marriage union. That is why you need to first think and decide whether to marry. To begin with, if possible, the couple should just try to live together for at least some time.

Constant communication

For a marriage to be happy, you need to spend more time with each other, share past events, emotions and impressions. This can be practiced even before marriage. If communication does not work out, then you should think about what the problem might be and try to eliminate it. You can go to any event together and have a great time.

Common goals

We need to constantly support each other. To do this, there must be one common goal. That's what she needs to be pursued. Then family life will go on in a measured manner, and the couple will be happy. You also need to constantly try to look for the dignity of your soulmate, then communication will bring a lot of pleasure.

Natalya Kaptsova

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According to statistics, there are not so many families with many children in our country - only 6.6%. And the attitude in society towards such families in our time remains controversial: some are sure that many children are a sea of \u200b\u200bhappiness and help in old age, others explain the “phenomenon of large families” by the irresponsibility of individual parents.

Pros and cons of a large family - what are the advantages of large families?

There are a great many myths, fears and contradictions when discussing large families. Moreover, they (these fears and myths) seriously influence the decision of young parents - to continue to raise the demographics of the country or to stop with two kids.

Many want to continue, but the disadvantages of having many children scare and stop halfway:

The refrigerator (and not even one) is emptied instantly. Even for 2 growing organisms, a lot of products are required daily - naturally fresh and of high quality. What can we say if there are four, five or even 11-12 kids.
There is not enough money. The requests of a large family, even with the most modest calculations, are similar to the requests of 3-4 ordinary families. Do not forget about the cost of education, clothing, doctors, toys, recreation, etc.
Finding compromises and maintaining a friendly atmosphere among children is extremely difficult. - there are many of them, and all with their own characters, habits, features. We have to look for certain “tools” of education so that the authority of parents among all children is stable and indisputable.
It is impossible to leave the kids to a grandmother for the weekend or a neighbor for a couple of hours.
There is a catastrophic lack of time. For all. For cooking, for work, for "pity, caress, talk." Parents get used to lack of sleep and chronic fatigue, and the division of responsibilities always occurs in the same way: older children take on part of the load of parents.
It is difficult to maintain individuality, and being the owner simply will not work: in a large family, as a rule, there is a “law” on collective property. That is, everything is common. And it is not always possible even for your own personal corner. Not to mention "listen to your music", "sit in silence", etc.
Traveling for a large family is either impossible or difficult. It is easier for those families who can buy a large minibus. But here, too, difficulties await - you will have to take a lot more things with you, food, again, increases in price according to the number of family members, you have to spend solid money on hotel rooms. It is also quite difficult to visit, meet friends.
The personal life of parents is difficult. There is no way to escape for a couple of hours, it is impossible to leave the children alone, and at night someone will definitely want to drink, pee, listen to a fairy tale, because it is scary, etc. The emotional and physical burden on parents is quite serious, and you have to make a lot of effort not to become strangers to each other, not to turn into servants for children, not to lose authority among them.
On the career of two at once, most often you can put an end to it. It is simply impossible to run up the career ladder when you have lessons, or cooking, or endless sick leave, or circles in different parts of the city. As a rule, dad works, and mom sometimes manages to earn extra money at home. Of course, when the children grow up, there is more time, but the main opportunities have already been missed.

Someone will be surprised, but there are still advantages in a large family:

Constant self-development of mom and dad. Like it or not, personal growth is inevitable. Because on the go you have to adjust, rebuild, invent, react, etc.
When the baby is alone, he needs to be entertained. When there are four children, they take care of themselves. That is, there is a little time for household chores.
A large family is more than children's laughter, fun, joy for parents. Older children help around the house and with the younger ones, and are also an example for the little ones. And there is no need to say how many assistants dad and mom will have in old age.
Socialization. There are no owners and egoists in large families. Regardless of desires, everyone comprehends the science of living in society, putting up, looking for compromises, giving in, etc. Children from an early age are taught to work, be independent, take care of themselves and others.
No time to be bored. There will be no depression and stress in a large family: everyone has a sense of humor (you simply cannot survive without it), and there is simply no time for depression.

A big family - what can be hidden behind a sign and when can it be called happy?

Of course, living in a big family is an art. The art of avoiding quarrels, doing everything, resolving conflicts.

Which, by the way, in a large family a lot ...

Lack of living space. Yes, there is a myth that large families can count on the expansion of the area, but in reality everything is more complicated. Well, if there is an opportunity to move (build) a big house outside the city - there is enough space for everyone. But, as a rule, most families huddle in apartments where every centimeter of space is valuable. And the grown older child can no longer bring a young wife into the house - there is nowhere.
Lack of money. They are always lacking in an ordinary family, and even more so here. You have to deny yourself a lot, “be content with little”. Often, children feel left out at school / kindergarten - their parents cannot afford expensive things. For example, the same computer or expensive mobile phone, modern toys, fashionable clothes.
About clothes in general it is necessary to say separately. One of the unspoken rules of a large family is “the younger ones wear out after the older ones.” While the kids are small, there are no problems - at 2-5 years old, the child simply does not think about such things. But growing children are extremely negative about “wearing out”.
Older children are forced to be a support and help for parents . But this situation does not always suit them. Indeed, at the age of 14-18 years, their interests appear outside the home, and you don’t want to babysit the kids instead of walking, meeting with friends, your own hobbies.
Health problems. Considering that it is almost impossible to devote time to the health of each baby (and just a baby), problems of this kind often occur in children. Lack of vitamins and a complete diet (you still have to save almost all the time), lack of opportunities to strengthen immunity by various methods (training, hardening, swimming pools, etc.), “crowding” of family members in a small room, the inability to constantly keep children in sight ( one fell, another knocked, the third and the fourth had a fight) - all this leads to the fact that parents have to take sick leave very often. What can we say about seasonal diseases: one gets ARVI, and everyone else picks it up.
The absence of silence. The regimen for children of different ages, respectively, is different. And when the little ones need to sleep, and the older children need to do their homework, the kids from the middle age category frolic to the fullest. Silence is out of the question.

How to remain a personality in a large family - effective and time-tested rules of education in large families

There is no universal scheme of education in a large family. Everything is individual, and each family has to independently determine the framework, internal rules and laws for itself.

Of course, main landmark remains unchanged- education should be such that children grow up happy, healthy, self-confident, and do not lose their individuality.

should be indisputable! Even taking into account the fact that over time, the upbringing of children is divided between older children, dad and mom. The parent word is law. Anarchy in the family should not be. How exactly to build and strengthen their authority, moms and dads decide "in the course of the play" in each individual cell of society. It is also worth remembering that focusing solely on the needs, interests and whims of the child is wrong. Power is dad and mom, people are children. True, the government should be kind, loving and understanding. No despots and tyrants.
Children should have their own personal zone, and parents should have their own. Kids should remember that here their toys can “walk” as much as they like, but here (in the parent’s bedroom, on the mother’s desktop, on the father’s chair) is absolutely impossible. Also, children should know that if the parents are “in the house” (in their personal zone), then it is better not to touch them, unless there is an urgent need for this.
Parents should give equal attention to all their children. Yes, it’s difficult, it doesn’t always work out, but you need to keep up - talk with each kid, play, discuss children’s problems. Let it be 10-20 minutes a day, but for each and personally. Then the children will not fight with each other for the attention of mom and dad.
Do not overload your children with responsibilities - even if they are already “big”, and are able to partially unload mom and dad. Children are not born in order to later throw off their upbringing on someone. And the obligations assumed at the birth of the next baby are the responsibility of the parents and no one else. Of course, it is not necessary to raise egoists - children should not grow up as spoiled sissies. Therefore, “duties” can be placed on your children only for educational purposes and in a dosed manner, and not because mom and dad have no time.
Equally important is the priority system. You will have to learn how to quickly decide what to do immediately and quickly, and what can generally be put aside. To take on everything in a row is irrational. Forces simply will not remain for anything. Therefore, it is important to learn how to make a choice. And it doesn't have to involve sacrifice.
No disagreements between mom and dad! Especially on the topic of intra-family laws and regulations. Otherwise, the authority of the parents will be seriously shaken, and it will be extremely difficult to restore it. Children will listen to mom and dad only if they are one.
You can't compare your children. Remember, each one is unique. And he wants to stay that way. The child is offended and hurt when he is told that his sister is smarter, his brother is quicker, and even the younger peanuts are more obedient than him.

Well, and most importantly - create an atmosphere of love, harmony and happiness in the family . It is in such an atmosphere that children grow up as independent, full-fledged and harmonious personalities.

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Contrary to the statistical tables of demographers, there are more and more large families in our country. Children are born - it's wonderful. But do they get everything they need when there are three or more babies in the house?

Traditionally in Rus' big family has always been the norm. "Seven in the shops" was in the huts of poor peasants and in the mansions of wealthy people. All children, from young to old, were part of a single whole. Everyone had their own household chores. The elders worked in the field and in the garden, the middle ones looked after the kids and tended the cattle, everyone was at work. Holidays were also celebrated together.

Oddly enough, in our age of electronics and total lack of time, the institution of large families is being revived. Three or more successors of the genus are no longer a rarity, but rather the norm. Maybe the matter is in the policy of the state, which encourages a population explosion (payment of parental capital, benefits for travel by public transport, assistance from municipalities, partially paid vouchers to children's health camps, etc.)? What do psychologists say?

Big family benefits:

There are many of us, we have to reckon with other children, which means that a small person learns to take care of the younger ones, listen to the elders, and share. It is unlikely that he will grow up an egoist.
There is always work, responsibility, diligence are brought up.
If children are brought up in a healthy atmosphere, then, as adults, they continue to help each other, take care of their parents.
"Seven on the benches" – this means that parents will never feel alone. First, children, and then grandchildren - all of them will be able to brighten up old age for an elderly couple.
Where there are a lot of guys, it's never boring. There is always something to do.
Many kids - many helpers, it is easier for parents to some extent, especially if big family lives outside the city.

Cons of a large family:

Even in a large family, egoists can be brought up.
The need for work, sometimes hard, can turn your child away from work.
The problem of square meters. The apartments are crowded, often the child does not have the opportunity to be alone and his own space.
Due to the archi workload of parents, adults do not have enough time for education. Especially if the mother and father work.
The younger ones have to "wear out"for older clothes, toys, furniture. This is offensive, and can cause a growing person to envy or aggression towards elders and parents.
In dysfunctional large families, all children are in cramped life circumstances, they are starving, they study poorly, they need the help of a psychologist, teacher, physician, etc.
Unfortunately, in Russia, a family is considered to have many children, where the oldest successor of the clan has not yet reached the age of 18. And then the number of children does not decrease, and the benefits disappear.
To support a large family, you need to earn very well, because now the trend is such that one more family member is a luxury, everything is very expensive. What if there are a lot of kids?

Big family is great! But only if the parents live peacefully and raise their children in an atmosphere of mutual respect, care for each other, responsibility, hard work and love.

Love your children, no matter how many there are!

Ecology of life. I don't think our family is big at the moment - only five people. But in many places this is how we are called - both in Russia and abroad. And many more are afraid to start a big family

I don't think our family is big at the moment - only five people. But in many places this is how we are called - both in Russia and abroad. And many more are afraid to start a large family. There are a lot of fears and myths in my head. At the same time - many want, but prick.

A large family has many advantages, they are much more than difficulties. And I will describe them below. But there are downsides. And I don't want to pretend it doesn't exist.

Film frame "Yours, mine and ours"

So let's start with them.

Food runs out instantly. Especially among vegetarians, because fresh vegetables and fruits cannot be stored for a long time. Well, all this is eaten in two counts. To the store every day or every other day. The husband is always in shock, where did everything go. I remember the story of the mother of 9 children that 20 kg of oranges ran out in a day.

It is impossible to please everyone all the time. With one or even two children, it is easy to find compromises and make sure that everyone is always happy. And if there are three, four, five or more children? Some people are always happy, some not so much. And this is not a tragedy, this is the norm. The main thing is that the disgruntled face changes, and not always be the same.

You need to change tools and change yourself (parents). One child can be passed to each other as a banner. Two children can be separated - one in each hand. And three? Four? We need to change all our ways of influencing children. And that means change inside.

Sometimes hands are missing.
Sometimes you even want to hug everyone at once - but it doesn’t always work out. And sometimes you wash the ass of one, and somewhere else falls. And you need to urgently feel sorry for him, but the priest is still not washed.

You need to set the boundaries of your time more strictly. When you have one child and he sleeps, this is your time. And when there are three of them, and one is sleeping, and two are not? Or two are sleeping and one is not? Whose time is it then?

Find an opportunity to give everyone personal attention. It can be difficult, but a child does not need much attention - to draw a little together, collect Lego, cuddle.

There is no time to be lazy and depressed, because all the time you need to take care of someone. This can be considered both a plus and a minus.

Even children who love each other sometimes quarrel and fight. Especially boys - and there are always enough reasons. It's hard to bear, but I haven't seen brothers and sisters who never swear.

Different tastes - in food, for example. You can't always please everyone with one dish. You have to twist.

Collective ownership of almost everything, try to take something of your own just for yourself - from a piece of mango to new pencils. Whoever found it, that and slippers. And someone will definitely find it.

Noisy. Quiet only at night, when everyone is sleeping - and then not for long. The silence becomes so desirable.

More things in the house and more to take on trips. One suitcase for five is no longer enough. And since there are more things, it can be more difficult with order, and with washing, and with laying out in places.

Traveling is more expensive - tickets, large rooms (they don’t always let you settle in one ordinary one, sometimes you have to take 2 rooms or one large one), you need large cars for rent, and so on.

It's hard for parents to be alone. Only if you run away from home, leaving the children with someone. As one father of many children said - the more children in the house, the less likely it is that there will be more of them ... well, you know what he means.

You have to reboot all the time. What worked for one won't necessarily work for the other. With one there will be some difficulties, with the other - others. There is no single algorithm for educating and solving all problems.

In a large family, do not click the claws, as my husband says. If you think for a long time whether you want a banana, you will be left without a banana. This is a minus for those who are used to thinking for a long time. Or like me, I'm used to finding something where I put it.

The husband turns from a native person into a service staff. The same is true about the wife - give, bring, stroke, feed, wash, clean. The functional load increases on parents, even with the help of elders. You have to delegate - and find time for opportunities to just love.

The more children, the less often you are invited to visit - especially those who do not have children.

Things quickly become unusable - the more children, the more likely it is that they will paint wallpaper, bed linen, and break a vase.

Let's move on to the pros, shall we? There are many more, and I did not write down all of them.

Funny. In general, there is no way to get bored when there are so many different loved ones around. The more children, the more unpredictable the world.

Personal growth. Permanent - for both mom and dad. Whether they want it or not. And this is a plus - you definitely won’t stiffen!

In many ways, two is easier than one, and three is easier than two. They are distracted by each other, play, build relationships with each other.

Much depends on the older child - the younger ones will take an example from him. Therefore, many say that it is enough to educate one, and then put it on stream. Sometimes it is enough for one to teach something - and he will teach the rest.

A huge portion of the daily "mi-mi-mi", that is, what you can admire endlessly - when they hug and kiss each other. When they are dressed the same, when they share with each other and take care of each other.

It is beautiful. Photos, family videos, the same clothes - so many different ways to keep memories of the childhood of the little ones!

It `s naturally. And many things are revealed only after the third child, and some only after the fifth (according to rumors). Many say that three children is not a large family, but a normal family.

All children are different. And in a large family there is a chance to see this in practice, when the same parents have several completely different children. There is less chance that you will fulfill your dreams and realize your ambitions at their expense.

real socialization. From which you can’t hide, you can’t pretend to be someone. You have to learn to build relationships, conflict, put up, express feelings and yourself. For real. This is more like the realities of life than the artificial collection of children of the same age in kindergarten.

You can not go to kindergarten - why, if you have a real kindergarten at home?

There is always someone to hug right now. Anytime and anywhere. And it's great!

Mom will have to take care of herself and her internal development - otherwise she will not survive. She will have to find a hobby and change her attitude towards herself.

Both parents will have to "grow" a sense of humor, which is very valuable. Again - because otherwise it will not work.

With the birth of children, you become more efficient - you get more done in less time. The best time management teacher is children.

Large families teach patience, humility, service. Children in them are more mature, more independent, they know how to take care and work, it is easier for them to create families and they understand what to do with children.

And yes, I will highlight this separately. Children from large families understand what parenthood is, what to do with the little ones, what to play, how to care for. For them, the birth of their children does not become a shock or some kind of punishment. They have already gone through the school of a young fighter. And this is very important!

And when the parents are gone, each other will have enough of them to support each other and be friends.

You can learn a lot - because each child is interested in something different. Become a pro in drawing, and in Lego, and go to fire stations, and learn to sew and knit.

Parents, finally, have to delegate responsibilities - one or two children can be fully serviced on their own. But when there are three or four of them, you have to look for other solutions to the problem.

According to my observations, mothers of many children are always very versatile and insanely beautiful - both inside and out.

In a large family, the amount of love and happiness increases proportionally - or even exponentially.

And yes, it's not much more expensive than raising 1-2 children - just a different management (things move from one to another, a lot is used more intensively and collectively, the excess is discarded and quite easily).

Space for the realization of the talents of mom and dad!
You can lead the masses, you can put on performances, you can put together a basketball team!

More joy, positive emotions, inspiration. Every child contributes to this great cause.

Children open this world to us anew. Every time. Every child. And it's amazing.

It's amazing to see in their eyes the continuation of their beloved husband. Each time is different. This is probably the most amazing feeling - to give birth to a piece of a loved one.

A large family is an occasion to reconsider your life and move on to a more natural one. For example, moving to the countryside, growing your own food, being closer to nature. With one or two children, you can live in the city. With three or more - already more difficult.

When a mother is busy with an important matter - that is, raising children, she leaves her energy there. While the child is small, he needs one hundred percent, and a lot of energy is spent, she has no time to do nonsense. But as soon as she grows up, her mother gradually begins to endure the brain of her father. Because she has too much energy. It would be possible for her to work, but then she will spend everything there. But it would be better for her to give birth to someone again - and throw out her strength there.

It will not be boring. Guaranteed.

In a large family, children do not suffer from overprotection, parents have no time to control them, to monitor them totally. There is more freedom and independence in their lives.

Children under five naturally radiate happiness. Therefore, the first five years of happiness in the house are so many.

Mom and dad become not just a couple, but truly family people. The more children you have, the stronger your spiritual and spiritual intimacy, the more valuable the relationship, the more love in them.

Faith in God increases. You have to believe that someone other than you is keeping your children and protecting, otherwise you will just go crazy with anxiety and the inability to be everywhere at the same time.

Pluses and minuses ... And the children grow up, grow up, and at home it becomes quieter and quieter ... And you are already so used to the noise and children's laughter. Children are like a drug. It's good when they are, when there are a lot of them. And as one man once said, there should always be a small child in the house, as long as possible. I agree with him.

A big family means more worries, more noise, more laughter and tears, more love and reasons for joy. Once upon a time, all families were like that. Now they are in the minority. It's a pity. Let's change this statistic, shall we? published

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