Simple recipes. How to create the perfect relationship
Any woman dreams of an ideal, stable relationship that would make her happy, desirable, loved and sexy. Of course, to some extent, the presence of such ideal relationship depends on your boyfriend, but there is only one person who can make any relationship perfect - it's you!
Do you think that ideal relationships do not exist and this is a myth? Not at all. Of course, such relationships are very rare, but still they exist and I will tell you even more. If you use our tips, which you will learn below, then you will be able to make perfect.
Be faithful
One of the most important building blocks of a long, happy and ideal relationship is loyalty. The main sign of fidelity is love, so if you mean no love, and even more so about ideal relationship and there can be no talk.
trust each other
You must cultivate confidence in yourself and over every trifle. Groundless jealousy can destroy not only ideal, but also any relationship. In no case do not arrange interrogations for your man, do not check his mail, sms, phone calls. You must develop a rule in yourself - trust him in everything.
Get ready to change
One of the main reasons for breakups and divorces is not the desire to make concessions and change your habits or change your principles. You have to overcome your pride and decide what is more important for you - to smoke a cigarette or to be happy with your boyfriend.
Joint pastime
If you want to ideal relationship then you should spend more time together. Visit together, have breakfast together, have dinner together, go on vacation together, etc. You should have more "we" than "I". Learn to consult with your significant other, especially when decisions are made that affect both of you.
Respect your partner's independence
Having common hobbies and interests is great, but your partner may also have personal interests that you may not share. Therefore, do not blame him for this. For example, your boyfriend might play poker with his friends every Friday night. They have a male company where they can talk about their male problems and interests. Men need masculine companionship, just as women need women.
touch more often
Hug and kiss each other more often. It is not necessary to do this only for a reason, but it is possible without a reason. After intimacy, lie down in his arms, caress your loved one. When you walk down the street, hold hands. At a party or when watching a movie, take his hand, stroke it. Gently touching your partner throughout the day activates production and also allows you and your boyfriend to be aware of your closeness to each other.
regular sex
According to the observations of scientists, more than 80% of divorces occur for such a banal reason as a lack of sex. And this, in principle, is obvious, if the sexual life does not suit one or both partners, they develop dissatisfaction and disappointment with the current relationship, which over time they will begin to compensate on the side. Make sex a part of your life, just like having breakfast or going to the gym. Ask your boyfriend how often he would like to have sex and find a compromise between your desires and his needs. For example, make a rule for yourself - have sex 2-3 times a week.
Looking for a compromise
In any controversial issues, try to reach a compromise. Don't make a small problem a big one. If you cannot reach a compromise solution, then agree that now you are making a concession, and next time he is.
Learn to listen
To make your own relationship perfect You need to learn to listen to your boyfriend. It often happens that during a controversial conversation, people stop hearing each other, defending their point of view, and as a result, everything ends in a quarrel and resentment. Therefore, so that there are no unpleasant moments in life, learn to calmly listen to the arguments and arguments of your boyfriend and also calmly present your point of view. The ability to listen perfectly will help you find compromises in any family matters.
Support
Your man should feel that you are his fulcrum, that you will support him in any difficult situation or when making a difficult decision. If he decides to change his job to a higher paying one, then tell him that you approve of his choice. If he has trouble at work, then calm him down by saying that everything will come to his senses. Mutual support is a pledge ideal, happy relations. However, do not confuse support with "darling, you are always right."
Learn to be unpredictable
Over time, couples get to know each other well and become able to predict the actions of a partner, his behavior or even thoughts. From this, your partner may seem like a read book, which is already terribly boring, so it is very important for you to sometimes be unpredictable and spontaneous. For example, out of the blue, offer to give him a massage, or instead of swearing at his scattered socks, put them in the wash yourself and tell him: "Honey, your socks were dirty here, I put them in the wash." Your non-standard behavior will rekindle passion in your relationship, and this is another step towards perfect relationship.
Be tolerant
Each of us has our faults, but we also have our virtues. Be tolerant of your boyfriend's shortcomings, ignore them, don't dwell on them, think only about his positive aspects. You must love a man as a whole, with his strengths and weaknesses. There is such a wise expression - if you can not change the situation, change your attitude towards it. If you follow this principle, your relationship will become much better and happier.
Surprise
Make surprises for your loved one, surprise him periodically. Why wait until February 23rd to give him a gift, do it today. It is not necessary to give something expensive, sometimes a kinder surprise is enough to please your soulmate. The most important thing is that you show a sign of attention and love. Or, for example, pick him up from work and take him an evening walk along the embankment. Remember, even such small things can provoke big and strong emotions.
Go on dates
Many people think that going on dates is the prerogative of couples at the "candy-bouquet" stage of a relationship, while dating is optional for everyone else. This is an erroneous opinion. To keep your relationship fresh, you should date periodically, at least once a month. It would be ideal if you arrange unusual dates for each other, for example, go bowling, paintball or horseback riding, although a simple trip to a pizzeria or sushi will also have a positive result.
As you can see, to have ideal relationship not much is required. Guided by these little tips, you can turn even the most boring relationship into a standard of ideality. Be happy and love each other.
Starting a relationship is easy, but keeping the thin but strong thread that binds you is not easy. You need to learn to fight for love, overcome the inevitable difficulties and preserve the good that once brought you together. Is there a universal recipe for happiness? How to keep love and passion, how to learn to bypass sharp corners?
1. Break stereotypes
Couples eventually develop a standard line of behavior, a kind of reaction to each other's actions. If you break the stereotype of behavior and behave differently than the partner expects (in a positive sense), you can color the relationship with new colors. For example, if you are usually angry that the man of your dreams forgets to wash the dishes, try not to get annoyed next time, but behave differently: for example, to joke. It will work.
2. Touch
Of course, you and your loved one hug and kiss each other in the morning and in the evening, gently hold each other in your arms after sex. But this is not enough! Simple actions - stroking his hand while watching TV together, walking hand in hand down the street, an inconspicuous caress at a party, cinema, club - all this creates a very special connection between you. Touching your partner throughout the day triggers happiness hormones, and you feel closer to each other on an instinctive level.
3. Don't be friends
In theory, being not only a beloved woman, but also a friend for your man is not bad. In practice, this kind of connection kills all sexual attraction in the bud. If you lose that special connection and attraction that can only occur between a passionate man and woman (and not friends), your relationship will turn from sharply sexual to friendly. Leave friendly conversations to your friends.
4. Go on a sex diet
Sex is not the time for discussions and romantic conversations (although women often forget this). Strengthen your relationship by going on a kind of sex diet: make sex as regular a part of your life as dieting or going to the gym. Schedule sex6 make it your goal to make love at least twice a week and strictly follow this rule, regardless of fatigue, headache and desire to sleep.
5. Look for a compromise
When making decisions together, try to take into account the interests of each other. Even if your interests are diametrically opposed, a reasonable compromise can always be found. Do you dream of spending your vacation shopping in Europe, and your dear one dreams of Egyptian sands and palm trees? Stop your choice in Turkey: both the sand is in place and the prices for clothes are much lower.
6. More positive, less negative
There is a more effective way to show dissatisfaction than to get angry and make a scene. Hide your negativity between two positive comments: "Darling, I love the way you do the dishes. The only thing that upsets me is that you do it so rarely. But I'm sure you won't have a hard time pleasing me next time."
7. Listen to the echo
When you start a serious conversation about your relationship, you are often so preoccupied with how to respond to your partner that you do not always hear what he is saying to you. Therefore, in any showdown, it is very important to repeat what was said to each other - so you will be sure that you hear and are heard.
8. Learn Tolerance
None of us are perfect, and our "cockroaches" are not going anywhere. Instead of wasting your nerves on each other's shortcomings, try to look for the positives in them, even if they are not obvious at first. If, for example, he overreacts to a football match, don't be angry - remind yourself that he can be just as passionate a lover as he is a fan.
9. Support him
Perhaps you do not always agree with your man: do not approve of his quarrels with his best friend, or think that his boss is behaving unfairly towards him. But no matter how you feel about all this, do not forget the most important thing - you should always be on his side. "Being on his side" doesn't mean you have to take a "dear, you're always right" attitude. One should not approve of quarrels with a friend, but one should support and listen to his arguments. You shouldn't approve of the boss's behavior, but you shouldn't throw tantrums with shouts of "Why are you always extreme?" Let him feel your invisible support always and in everything.
10. Surprise
You don't have to wait for a holiday to give your loved one a gift. Gifts make a lot more sense when they are given unexpectedly. Make a nice habit of giving each other not necessarily expensive, but pleasant little things. Let him turn to the market on his way home from work and buy you a basket of strawberries, and you will not forget to choose marmalade at the grocery store. Little things like that will show that you really think and care about each other.
11. Have dates
The novelty of the relationship is smoothed out over time, and sometimes passion is replaced by boredom. Do not think that love has passed - you just got used to each other and lost the charm of the first months of the relationship. It’s easy to fix this: arrange unusual dates for each other, and the feeling of novelty and freshness of the relationship will return! Of course, a simple trip to a restaurant or a movie will not solve the problem. Something unexpected is more likely to come up here - tickets for an unusual concert, snowboarding lessons, boating - everything that is difficult to predict in advance.
No matter what anyone says, every woman will agree that relationships in the family depend on her. But, if there is a turmoil in a relationship, we very rarely look for the causes of the conflict in ourselves, blaming the partner for all mortal sins. If you want to create a harmonious relationship, learn how to resolve issues in a conversation, and not in a quarrel, follow these simple tips and the relationship will improve.
2. Sometimes it takes a lifetime to get to know a person perfectly. And if together you have not experienced the sorrows of a real loss and the sweetness of victory, do not rush to think that you know the person who is nearby well. And repair. Repair is not a weak test of the strength of a relationship.
3. We all want to lean on a strong male shoulder, and tend to believe that he must be strong, solve all problems and understand all things in the world. But you should be prepared for the fact that your man is not a superhero, and that he may be in the same panic and confusion as you are.
4. Periodically please a man with your signature dish. Learn to cook something special, but not necessarily what you gave your boyfriend at the beginning of your relationship. Even if he didn't like it, gentlemanly manners won out and he didn't confess. Prepare something new.
5. Like all normal people, you work all day, then do housework, cooking and raising children. But the day would not be so difficult, carve out ten minutes for hugs. This is very close and gives vitality.
6. Before you spend the rest of your money on another "oh my god - what - incredibly - beautiful - shoes," imagine your husband's face when you tell him about it. Imagination will help you cope with an attack of shopaholism, and not buy an extra thing.
7. Don't be smart. Especially at the husband's corporate party or in front of his friends. Even if you are used to being the star of the evening, to which everyone listens, subdue your ego and step aside. Let a man shine with erudition, and you amaze everyone with your beauty.
8. Many good relationships were ruined by everyday life. And if it seems to you that this will not happen to you, because you love each other, I will hasten to disappoint you. Here it is rather not about love, but about the ability to calmly discuss problems, to make mutual concessions. Remember, your husband has just as much to be offended by a missed toilet seat as you have to leave it up. Discuss all household issues at the dawn of a relationship.
9. We are all human, and sometimes we act not very smart. If the husband did something, did something stupid, which he regrets, it’s better to be silent. Do not remind him once again about the puncture. But you should not be silent if he says or does offensive, cruel, vile things. Living with such a person is a living hell.
10. Study each other. A man should know how to help you cope with fatigue, irritation, resentment, sadness. Someone wants consolation and a kilogram of chocolate ice cream, someone wants to be left alone. Mysteriousness in emotional terms is useless - he should not guess what you were offended by. Talk about your feelings directly and frankly - do not force the guy to think that he lives with an alien.
11. How to wean a husband to give flowers? Very simple. When he comes with a bouquet, ask from the threshold what he did? After several such situations, you are not just without a reason, but you won’t wait for a bouquet on a holiday either.
12. Appreciate your husband's attempts to create a romantic atmosphere. If he had difficulty preparing a dinner that turned out to be inedible, do not rush to criticize. It is not the organization that is important, but the very desire to please you, so enjoy it.
13. Harmony in relationships is a very fragile thing, based on mutual trust. Pockets, wallet and husband's phone are a forbidden zone for you. Clumsy attempts to turn into Miss Marple will do a disservice to family life. No need to spoil the relationship with stupid jealousy and unfounded suspicions.
14. There is a stereotype that as soon as you start sleeping in different rooms, this is the beginning of the end. Nonsense! Separate beds or just two blankets help to better relax in a dream, and indicate the maturity of the couple.
15. Do housework or hobbies together. Try to find a common hobby that will connect you. Cook together, clean the house, run in the morning. These things are very close.
16. The two most dangerous phrases that you can’t say to a man are “You are a loser” and “I never had an orgasm with you.” If this is true, why are you living with such a man? If not, and you said this in your hearts, during a quarrel, then it will not be easy to explain that this is not true. Even having reconciled, the man will no-no, and even remember hurtful words, doubting himself and your feelings? Always think before you say something.
00:00 5.11.2015
You want to be happy with a man, and this desire is normal. But how to get along with another person? How to find ways to each other and remain yourself at the same time? Psychologists Tatyana Vlasyuk and Doris Castillo Mendoza helped us to understand these issues.
We all read fairy tales as children. Ah, what love there was! Cinderella and the Prince, Beauty and the Beast, Sleeping Beauty and (also) the Prince, Vasilisa the Beautiful and Ivan (the Fool or the Tsarevich - it doesn't matter). Then we grew up a little, reading up to the holes of years like in 13-14 "Scarlet Sails", where Assol waited for her Gray, a multi-volume series of "Angelica", "Gone with the Wind", "Singing in the Blackthorn" ...
We read them, at times, at night with a flashlight under the covers, bursting into tears of delight. And then dreamed, dreamed, dreamed. Of course, imagining yourself in the place of the main character - but what else?! At the age of 16-17, they experienced their first love, largely idealized, not always mutual, bright. Then - the second, the third ... We left, left us. The ground shook underfoot, scars remained on the soul. Then, probably, you uttered for the first time mentally or aloud the phrase "all men are ...". The synonymic row is rich and consists entirely of negative epithets.
It hurt every time, but we still fall in love again - that's life. "But again the grass will sprout through all the obstacles and misfortunes. Love is a spring country, because only in it there is happiness," Larisa, the "dowry" sang in the film "Cruel Romance". But each of us, saying goodbye to another love (always the last one), asked herself Tsvetaeva's question: "My dear, what have I done to you ?!"
Let's work on the bugs. It may be hard to believe, but ideal relationships do exist. It happens, it can happen to you. And it doesn't matter if you're just waiting for him, you've already met him, or you've been together for a long time.
"The ideal couple is two people, a man and a woman, who, being together, remain themselves. They do not play roles, do not lie or manipulate, but appear as they are. And they love this openness and trust in themselves, and in a partner." Our consultants offer several original techniques and tests that will help you understand yourself and understand your relationship with a loved one.
How to meet the right man
Do you think you need to lose weight first? But no! You need to start not with external attributes of beauty, but with work on yourself.
You - the one and only: realize your own worth. When a woman appreciates herself, it is as if a crown appears on her head. Not arrogance and pride, but the crown of self-love.
It is on your quality of love and respect for yourself that the corresponding person is attracted, who, by his behavior and attitude towards you, shows how you treat yourself. Therefore, it depends only on you what kind of man will be next to you.
Let yourself wish
There is the Law of Pure Desire, which says: "As long as we keep the intention pure, a positive result is guaranteed. But if we pollute our desire with fear, greed, or the desire to get someone else, it is unlikely to be realized."
There are five qualities in the Law of Pure Desire:
- hope
- inspiration
- faith
- knowing that you deserve the best
- retreat
A conflict of intentions can prevent your desires from coming true. You want love. But uncertainty and anxiety cool enthusiasm and provoke feelings of fear and anxiety: "What if I do something stupid again, say something wrong, trust the wrong person? What if I fail again?"
Stop. If you want to attract love into your life, you need absolute faith that you deserve it and everything will be fine. In love, it is the firm belief that you can love and be loved.
Adopt affirmations: "I am worthy of love and respect", "I can love and be loved", "I deserve to be loved for who I am."
Believe me, no matter what happened in the past, no matter what you thought about yourself before, you deserve love. But! To make your wish come true, give up being tied to the result. Be happy here and now, not when you meet the right person. It's very important not to dwell on it. Especially when you are 30-35 years old.
In psychology, there is such a thing as "panic of closing gates": you need to give birth to a child, and you need to get married - I'm late! This panic attracts into life something completely alien to you. You can’t allow yourself to despair or fuss, you need to clearly understand what you want and what you deserve. You can not live, constantly thinking about how to attract a man. This state repels with the same force as it attracts.
One hundred percent pleasure
“The most correct state in which a woman needs to be is to simply enjoy life, herself, her mood. After all, according to Gabriel Garcia Marquez, all the most beautiful things happen unexpectedly, when we don’t expect it. This is the right state.
Do not pull to yourself with all your mental strength, but enjoy! The same person will come to the enjoyment of a woman by herself and life. As soon as you start devoting enough time to yourself, doing what you love, what you like - going to dances, traveling, reading, listening to music, learning something new, interesting and worthy people appear around you, life gives you gifts and new acquaintances," our consultants are sure.
And, you must admit, to stay in such a state, large material resources are not needed. Start doing what you have long wanted, but there was no time.
"It is important for a woman to learn to be happy alone with herself, from herself, then she will be happy with a man. A mistake that we often make is to tie our happiness to a partner or an event that will happen sometime."
The reaction of the world to you reflects your inner state.
All mans…
I remember an anecdote: "The biology teacher cried and called pestles horned artiodactyls." So. Try to permanently exclude from the lexicon phrases (and thoughts) like "all men ..." and further down the negative synonymic row.
“In order to attract the right partner, you need to understand and respect each of the surrounding men. Learn, looking at the one you meet, to see something good in him, do not condemn the masculine gender as such.
Don't judge, don't neglect, don't blame. Accept!
Enter this state, and a high-level partner will be attracted to you. You will send completely different signals, project yourself differently. The result - a man in your life will take the right place," says Tatyana.
Let's enjoy the wait
This technique will help attract the right man into your life. Practice it a couple of times a week. Choose a calm and quiet place in your house, sit or lie down, relax. Take a deep breath in and out a few times. Feel how stress and tension go to the floor under your feet. You are warm, calm and serene.
On the next breath, imagine that five years have passed, and you and your loved one are in a pleasant place. Maybe the two of you are at a table in a cozy restaurant, maybe in bed. Stop for a minute and pay attention to what you are doing now - the details.
Are you married? Do you have children? Take a breath and feel the joy of this scene. Your dream has come true. You are close to your soul mate, you love each other. Let this reality fill your heart and mind. Imagine that you look into his eyes and remember what you were doing shortly before you met him.
Now again remember the present moment, leaving this joyful state with you. Remember that by making a promise to yourself to get the most out of each day, you have already connected in your mind with your loved one. As you prepare yourself for his appearance, so he prepares for a meeting with you.
Take the last and deepest breath, as you exhale, fold your arms at your chest. Slowly open your eyes.
After that, take the time to write down something you and your partner would love to remember, and promise yourself to start creating that experience right now. There is a chance that the ideas came to your mind for a reason...
Relations at the start
You met a man. You are just getting started. Do you have vague doubts? Then read on.
Time magazine collaborated with CNN to conduct a study. As a result, it turned out that women are more likely than men to reject marriage or close relationships, waiting to meet the Ideal Man. And men tend to forgive a woman more if they like her appearance. But we, women, judge strictly and quickly. Are we winning? In fact, ideal in nature does not exist. The ideal partner for you is the one with whom you feel the best. And the first sign is when partners are comfortable in any situation. Even be silent.
I accept you...
At the initial stage of a relationship, it is important to help yourself, a new relationship. How? Negotiate: "Let's accept each other as we are. If you snore - okay. I'm munching. We're people..."
Tell yourself: "I accept my partner as a person."
Difficult? Do one more exercise. Divide a sheet of paper in half. On the left, write what annoys you in him, pisses you off, and on the right - everything that “turns on” you, and likes, and supports, and inspires you in him.
Look - what is actually more. And honestly give an assessment - are you ready to accept this minus, looking at this plus? And what else do you need to work on to reduce this minus. After all, as soon as a sock forgotten under the bed stops annoying you, it miraculously evaporates somewhere. A man can change.
Speaking of princes
"Very often, many of those who are waiting for a prince on a white horse overly idealize a man. This attitude is instilled by mothers in their daughters, because girls like fairy tales and movies about ideal relationships. They begin to live in this world and then it is very difficult to find a life partner, " Doris notes.
It is important to understand and realize that a man, just like a woman, can be different, ideal in something, not in something. Allow initially for yourself the possibility of being imperfect. If a woman has an ideality syndrome, then she is very demanding of herself, she tries to be perfect herself, and wants the same ideal partner. But it may not exist in nature.
“An idealist woman should relax, enjoy life, allow herself to manifest herself in different ways, not meet the standards.
In the same way, a man - he can be better than the norms that you came up with for him. In order to understand this, you can also sit down and pee. What is my ideal for me? As far as all these points that I have prescribed are important, critical and principled for me. Essentially a blond with blue eyes? Where there is categoricalness, there is no longer freedom. Or maybe fate has already prepared for her a brunette with brown eyes?" - adds Tatyana.
By the way, where are your wings?
And is this the man? The answer to this question lies in the realm of intuition.
But. He is not yours if, after some time after the start of your communication, you begin to feel a breakdown. Inspiration, vital activity disappears, and quarrels, showdowns draw out all the vital juices from you. If this is grinding, it’s not scary, because in moments of intimacy, when everything is fine, partners fill each other with energy. But if there is no filling, only a constant release, a drain of energy, this is not your relationship.
On the contrary, if you feel that wings are growing, if you are complimented, how younger you are, you look cool, this is an indicator that your man is next to you.
Together for life
You have been a couple for a long time, the honeymoon is over. How to learn to coexist together with two realized people?
When an accomplished woman meets an equally self-sufficient man, the question of compatibility of freedoms arises. Everyone is used to their non-free schedule, to express their opinion, no one wants to obey - how can they find a common language? It's a question!
And I love looking out the window!
The first recommendation for those who are already a couple, at first glance, is simple. You need to sit down and have a cup of tea or coffee without pretensions and any reproaches to tell each other what you like to do. But it's easier to write lists: what each partner likes or dislikes.
Divide a sheet of paper in half. One half is what you like, the second is what you really don’t like, what is not yours, what you don’t like, what upsets, brings discomfort, what upsets the other half, what makes you sad. A man and a woman write lists, then they are discussed together.
“I love it when you bring me coffee in the morning”, “I like it when you come home from work and tell me “Hi, mouse!” - maximum details!
The couple writes down the details of their relationship, looking through the last few years of their lives, to the maximum "I love it when you water the flowers", "I love to sit in the kitchen and be silent, looking out the window when you respect it and don't touch me."
First we discuss who loves what, then the second column. “So you say that I’m inattentive, it hurts me, I get upset”, “I don’t like to visit relatives “for show”, “I don’t like to pull your socks out from under the bed.”
The task is for each of the partners to enter the state of introspection as deeply as possible, to think slowly, allocating at least an hour or two for this, to create a suitable atmosphere.
The requirement "I love it, so you do it to me, otherwise you will be guilty" is unacceptable. The conversation should not proceed in line with the presentation of claims to each other. "You know", "it turns out", "it seems to me" - that's a set of phrases. This work is an investment in yourself, in your relationships.
And on Saturdays we have diflop
“The second technique is family rituals. It is designed to help each other experience more states that they like. We recommend that women take the initiative to organize all this,” says Tatyana. “You can arrange a week of some country, a week of fortune: generosity, gratitude ( a week we thank each other for all the little things) or a week without comments - no matter what the husband does."
This technique is very helpful to get to know your partner. It seems to us that if we live together for a long time, then the partner knows what we love and what not, just like we do, by default, and he may not even know about it!
After all, most people are not telepaths at all! We also recommend going to concerts, going to the cinema, going to sports events together, playing "mafia" with friends, running together, cooking dinner - not spontaneously, but on certain days, so that there are things that will later be called family traditions, couple traditions, what they do together.
One of the recommendations is to start a book of funny moments and joint jokes. Some things that make both of them happy. For example, they pulled out a phrase from a movie they watched together, they remembered it - fix it in a book. Or start such a game: "When we say this phrase, we mean it" - this is how you can play, for example, at a party.
In the film "What Men Talk About" - "diflop" - the dish is like that, one word, one phrase, and how much it costs! For example, the wife is going to cook something unusual for dinner and calls the dish "diflope". It is exquisite, it is very small - therefore - diflop. Little things like that turn into family jokes.
You can watch movies together, pull out phrases from there and apply phrases to situations in family life that will mean something, dilute everyday life and bring an element of the game into it. "We are approaching the end of the month, we will eat diflop - it is not enough, it is expensive."
And if you touch on sexual relations in a couple in order to somehow resume them, you can also use the technique of rituals. For example, every Saturday take a bath together with candles and music. Or lay on Saturday, for the whole weekend, a silk bed ...
You touch me with your hand
Another powerful technique for a couple who has been together for a long time is to choose a week and only touch, kiss, caress each other - and not have sex at the same time. It's called the Sensing Expectation Technique. We take a bath together, wipe each other with a towel, rub our backs, but no further.
After that, if the couple is really together, feelings intensify. There is a honeymoon feeling - you touch each other, as if for the first time. Men also like it, this is a state of foreplay, a kind of expectation. By nature, a man is a conqueror, and he is interested in doing it again and again.
Rewind the tape
Is there any development in your couple? Rewind the tape five years, ten years. Then you were alone, now you are different. This development should be reflected on you - on your inner state, on some material values, increasing your positive attitude, improving mutual understanding.
If you have lived a certain amount of time together, and remember losses, illnesses, problems, conflicts - this is also a marker of how correctly you chose a partner, how harmoniously you developed, and whether you are a couple at all. In fact, development is possible without these negative aspects and serious cataclysms. If life sends them, it means that we do not see and do not understand something.
You can develop more environmentally. No one says that it will be calm and even, but nevertheless, life together can be a pleasure, with real interest, and not leaps from scandal to reconciliation.
Excessive emotional swings are the first indicator that something is wrong in a couple. Even at the very beginning of a relationship.
There may be great strong love, but if it is too bright, with jealousy, quarrels, this is an alarm signal. “When a person tries to control another, manipulate him, this is not love, but an artificial attachment to oneself. It is important to understand: as soon as we catch ourselves in a state of jealousy, something is wrong in the relationship,” Tatyana is sure.
The more freedom we give to a partner, the more ideal we are for each other. There is no need to be afraid to internally let go of a loved one and allow him to do as he chooses. It's so nice to realize that this person wants to be with you according to his own sincere and free desire, and not because he is being held by the throat.
If a man pays attention to you, makes some gifts, not because he "needs", for show, but because he just wants to please you, appreciate and take care of this attitude.
"A man wants to take him there - let's go. He offers something - we agree. Follow him! No need to say that it's expensive, it's not necessary, and" I don't like and don't understand football at all. "If an impulse arises, it cannot be stopped "The next may not be. By taking the initiative of another person, you can build an ideal relationship," Doris is sure.
Photo in text: Shutterstock.com, Depositphotos.com
Ideal relationship - the dream of every guy and girl, but not everyone knows how to build and create them in the real world. After all, to build a relationship, you need to find a suitable soul mate who will love you, and you love her. In fact, most girls and guys have problems creating relationships, as they cannot find their happiness and live with him or her all their lives.
In the article, psychologists will help you understand how to build an ideal relationship in real time, what needs to be done and how. After all, they appear only when love is created between a couple. Follow the advice, and maybe you will find your happiness in this life.
First, find the person you want to build a relationship with.
To begin with, in order for you to have an ideal relationship, you need to find the person you love, since it is impossible to create an ideal and good relationship not out of love. Trusting your feelings, not your emotions, will solve some relationship problems.
Do not rush to create a serious relationship, live together and create a family until you know each other well enough. On average, it takes 3 years for the temporary attachment to go away. If after this period the feelings remained the same or even increased, then you can safely create a serious relationship and family.
There must be common goals, views and interests
To create and between a guy and a girl there must be not only feelings and love, but also common interests, goals and outlooks on life. They have to fill each other with something. Help each other, but do not try to change or pressure. There should be ease in relationships and freedom, then you will understand exactly what you need for each other, simple meetings or a serious relationship. Find out: as this is the result of incorrectly created relationships.
keep on loving
Even if feelings gradually worsen, then improve, you need to continue to love if you want to be with this person together. In any case, feelings will gradually fade away, but you always need to love one single person. If feelings begin to fade, do whatever it takes to keep them. Do everything as you did before to love each other. Give gifts, attention, walk together, do common things, communicate.
Determine the benefit or love you have in a relationship .
It is advisable to build, to decide at the initial stage, they are created because of profit or out of love. As you know, girls are looking for rather rich guys and because of this, some problems appear in the future. It's not about wealth, as there are many families where a rich man lives with a woman for love, and not for money. Decide what the relationship girl needs or your money. It is advisable not to show how rich you are at the initial stage of the relationship. And it is better to create relationships, being still a simple person.
It all depends on where you met
The main role in building an ideal relationship is played by the place where you met. For example, if in a club, then it is unlikely that your relationship will be serious, but not always. If you met by chance, then perhaps fate itself prompted you to find each other. Look for a girl or a guy where you yourself like to be. This will allow you to find the person with whom you share common interests. For example, if you are an athlete and like to go to the pool or the gym, then you can find your girlfriend there and fall in love with each other. Common interests will allow you to maintain an ideal relationship for many years. The main thing is not to deceive yourself and continue to be where you like yourself.
The main thing is not to rush
The mistake of many is that they are afraid that they will be left alone, so they rush, get to know each other quickly, get married and, as a result, get divorced from an unhappy relationship. Their mistake led them to even more wasted time. Why rush to create a family if you can just chat, walk or live together, although for 3 years, and then think about the family. Age doesn't matter yet. Someone is destined to find their destiny early, someone later, and those who go against fate end up where they started. There is no need to rush, but there is no need to close yourself from acquaintances and communication.
Look for a girl or guy who is similar to you in personality
It is often said that opposites converge, but they also quickly diverge, as quarrels and conflicts begin. It is not necessary to have the same characters, for an ideal relationship it is enough to have a common outlook on life. If a person has one point of view and is not going to ever change it, no need to put pressure on him, let him go, as you will constantly quarrel over disagreements.
Looking for someone who is ready for a serious relationship
It's really not that easy in the real world build the perfect relationship, since most still want to take a walk even at a considerable age. People who still like to go out to clubs, to drink, will never be devoted to you. They will cheat and deceive. This does not mean that you need to look for that person who sits at home and does not go out. You just need to find a person where you yourself often go. Since, having created a relationship, you will walk together in these places, even in the same clubs. Cheating often occurs due to the fact that a guy or a girl has not yet played enough and wants to take a walk, even if they already have a family and children. Find out: often for this you just need to remain a man.
You yourself will be able to understand whether it is possible to build with this person or not, if you just meet and be friends for several years. Taking risks and starting a family with a little-known person is pointless. Ideal relationship- this is a great desire of both parties, because if a guy or girl does not want a relationship, you will not force her.
psycho- olog. en
