What should be told about menstruation in the first place. How to tell a girl about her first period

As you know, time flies quickly, and those who have children know this best. Yesterday's funny babies are rapidly growing up and becoming teenagers. Sooner or later there comes an awkward moment when mom needs to tell her daughter about her period. How to do it right?

When Mom Should Start Talking About Periods

You need to start an important conversation at a certain age, when the girl is ready for it. In this regard, mothers can make two common mistakes.

Some are silent until the last moment and explain something to their daughter only when the critical days have already begun. Meanwhile, the blood of a child is always associated with pain, trauma. And misunderstanding of the situation that has arisen can provoke severe fear and even mental trauma.

Misunderstanding of the situation can provoke a strong fear and even mental trauma in an unprepared child.

In this regard, I recall a vivid episode from McCullough Colin's novel "The Thorn Birds". When the main character, fifteen-year-old Maggie, began her period, she was terribly frightened of this, hid it from her family and thought for several months that she was dying from a "shameful intestinal disease." As a result, it turned out that the priest of the local church, and not the mother, had to explain the truth to the girl.

She clasped her hands.

Father Ralph, I'm dying, I have cancer! ..

It's been half a year since it started, Father Ralph. I have terrible pains in my stomach, but not because I'm sick, and ... oh, Father Ralph ... there is so much blood flowing!

Father Ralph tossed his head sharply, which never happened during confessions; he looked at her shamefully lowered head, seized by a storm of conflicting feelings, and could not collect his thoughts. Ridiculous, joyful relief; wild anger at Fiona [author: the girl's mother] - he was ready to kill her; reverence, admiration - such a baby and so bravely held on all the time; and immeasurable, inexpressible embarrassment...

You're not dying, Maggie, and you don't have any cancer. I shouldn't have to explain this to you, but I'd better explain. Your mother should have told you a long time ago, prepared you in advance, I don't know why she didn't.

To avoid such a situation, the mother needs to start the conversation on time, in advance - when her daughter is about ten years old (after all, modern girls begin puberty earlier than, for example, twenty years ago).

Another mistake of adult women is that they proceed from their past experience and begin to educate their child at the age when they themselves learned about menstruation. However, each organism is individual, and in such a delicate matter one cannot be guided by heredity alone.

In general, mom should listen to her female intuition, as well as observe external changes in the girl's body. So, the following signs will be signal:

1. Rapid growth of the body.
2. Enlargement of the mammary glands.
3. The appearance of hair in the armpits and pubis.
4. Acne on the face, increased oiliness of the skin.
5. Changes in the psyche, behavior: the girl becomes more abrupt, irritable (the work of hormones affects).
6. Periodic mild cramping pains in the lower abdomen.

Photo gallery: signs of an early onset of menstruation in a girl

With the onset of puberty, many girls begin to have skin problems. One of the signs of puberty is the appearance of armpit and pubic hair. If a girl's breasts are rounded, then the first menstruation is just around the corner Shortly before the first menstruation, the girl may periodically be disturbed by cramping pains in the lower abdomen

Of course, mom should conduct a confidential conversation. If this is not possible, then this role should be taken on by the grandmother, older sister or godmother.

Video: when and how best to start a conversation with your daughter about menstruation

How to successfully organize a conversation

It is important to start an intimate conversation right. No need to do it very abruptly (straight to the point). If you tear a girl away from some activity, sit her down in front of her and announce with a serious look that now she is learning something very important, then the child can simply withdraw into herself or subconsciously perceive the information negatively.

The wrong moment can spoil the whole important conversation.

It is best to choose a time when the mother and daughter are alone at home, the girl is not particularly busy with anything and is always in a good mood. Alternatively, you can also talk while walking, for example, in a cozy square or park where there are no people nearby.

It is good to start a conversation with a discussion of related topics, for example, to notice how the daughter has changed recently (she has become prettier, seems more mature), and then smoothly move on to a topic that worries her mother.

A woman must also provide for a soft tone of conversation, a favorable facial expression (no need to make a too serious face), gestures.

Appropriate tone, smile, tactile contact are the keys to a successful conversation with a child.

An interesting trick is to initially arouse the girl's curiosity: for example, show the gasket and ask, “Do you know what this is? Are you wondering why this is needed?

You can spark your daughter's initial interest by showing her a pad.

Video: preparing a daughter for the first menstruation (a video from Always)

What aspects to pay attention to and what not to focus on

It is good to build a conversation about menstruation according to a pre-planned plan, for example, use this option:

1. Stages of development of the child, the difference in the physique of a girl and a girl. Here it is worth activating the daughter’s already existing knowledge: let her tell everything she already knows and ask what interests her.
2. What is menstruation, its harbingers in a girl. Time of onset of menarche (first menstruation). Cycle length.
3. Features of personal hygiene during critical days, which should not be done during critical days.
4. Possible problems associated with menstruation (for example, its prolonged absence). Here it is important to focus on rational nutrition. Indeed, many teenage girls inadequately evaluate their appearance and begin to exhaust themselves with diets. This breaks the cycle.

It is not at all necessary to immediately “spread” the entire amount of information. The interview can be carried out in 2-3 stages. It is very good to use your own experience: to talk about your experiences in the same period.

The daughter must understand that menstruation is a completely natural process that marks the transformation of a girl into a girl. And it is in the power of the mother to present everything in such a way that the child will not only not be afraid of first blood, but will wait for this event as a holiday.

It is in the power of the mother to inspire the girl that menstruation is a joyful event in life

It is very important to explain to the girl that menarche happens at different ages. And if her classmates are already having critical days, then this by no means means that they are better and more mature.

In this regard, my classmate Yulia is remembered. Until the 9th grade, the girl was small in stature and had a "childish" physique. She had not yet had her period (she herself admitted this), which caused ridicule from many other, more “adult” peers. After the 9th grade, Yulia left school, and I did not see her for several years. Imagine my surprise when one day at a reunion of graduates I saw a tall busty girl (later she became the mother of two children). So the late onset of menstruation does not at all mean the absence of femininity and inferior reproductive function.

There are things that it is better not to touch on in the first conversations about menstruation, so as not to cause unnecessary fears in the girl:

1. Possible very painful sensations during critical days. This also includes stories about labor pains.
2. Deepening into the issues of sexual intercourse, loss of virginity, sexually transmitted diseases. Of course, all this is very important, but it is a topic for a separate conversation, which is not yet the time for 10-11 years. If the girl has any questions from this area, the mother does not need to evade the answer, blush, but briefly explain in a language accessible to her age, without going into details.

Video: animated video about menstruation for children

All of us faced women's problems for the first time and were looking for a life partner for the first time. We have already gone through the periods of growing up that are just ahead of our daughters. How, where and when to start a conversation with a girl about menstruation and sexual life - about this in an interview with an obstetrician-gynecologist, head of the Family Health Academy Diana Mardas.

Moms usually make two typical mistakes. Some remain silent until the daughter begins her period and she herself asks what is happening. This situation can cause psychological trauma to the girl. The reputation of the mother will suffer, and most importantly, the girl can get psychologically traumatized. For all of us, blood is injury and damage. The girl at this moment, if she is not aware, will not understand what is happening to her, and will be frightened.

Other mothers remember at what age they themselves began to have critical days, for example, at 14 years old. Then they are waiting for their daughter's 14th birthday. This is also wrong. Feel free to subtract 1.5 years from your age. Now both menstruation and puberty occur earlier. Of course, heredity cannot be put anywhere, and if a mother’s period appeared at the age of 14-15, then her daughter will have it later than most of her peers. If the mother is early, then the girl is even earlier.

Moms should prepare for such a conversation and, most importantly, do not ignore it, do not miss it.

There are harbingers that the girl will soon begin menstruation, or rather, menarche (this is what the first menstruation is called)

About a year before menstruation, the girl begins to grow sharply and disproportionately (up to 12 cm). The feet, arms, hands are stretched, the skull becomes disproportionate to the body;
- The mammary glands are rounded and the halo changes;
- Hair becomes more oily at the roots;
- Hair appears in the pubic area and in the armpits;
- The skin becomes more oily, pimples, pimples, blackheads may appear;
- Behavioral changes appear - the girl can become sharper in communication.

These factors indicate that it is time to start a conversation. Of course, the ideal option is if the daughter herself began to ask questions, but not all mothers are so lucky, many will have to initiate a conversation.

In no case should you start it abruptly, saying: “My dear, sit down, I will tell you about menstruation.” In this case, the teenager will immediately close. The conversation should start smoothly - between times in a conversation or when watching a movie. In no case do not change the tone, do not highlight intonation. Everything should be calm, as in a normal conversation.

It is necessary to explain to the daughter that menstruation is growing up, the transformation of a girl into a woman. It will be very correct if the mother tells about her own experience, what she experienced and so on. This will serve as an additional clue for the teenager. In addition, this will bring the daughter closer to her mother - they will have common female themes.

Today, teenagers are influenced by glossy magazines, fashion films, where all women look great and have gorgeous figures. Therefore, it is important to explain that the physiological changes that occur to her, everyone goes through; that slight fullness in the chest and hips is a sign that she is growing into a grown woman, and not that she has gained weight. By the way, because of thoughts about fullness, young girls often stop eating, go on a diet, and then their periods disappear or go astray. Therefore, you need to assure the child that after a while everything will return to normal. Otherwise, the girl will not understand what is happening to her, she will consider herself an ugly duckling - this also affects the atmosphere and relationships in the family.

Today 10-11 years old is the normal age for the onset of menstruation

Previously, the norm for the onset of menstruation was the age of 12-13 years. Now - 10-11.

Personally, I attribute this to a change in diet. It has been scientifically proven that many agricultural and livestock products today contain growth promoters and estrogen-like substances that the body mistakes for the hormone estrogen. This hormone is also responsible for puberty.

I'm not saying that these products should be abandoned, such supplements are now everywhere. It’s just that if a girl’s period started early, it’s worth reconsidering her diet a little - perhaps there are too many of these products. Again, this is my personal point of view.

Many mothers, after having the main conversation, let the topic of hygiene take its course. They believe that this is all elementary and the child himself will be able to go to the store and buy everything. The girl can't. Firstly, she is shy and afraid, and secondly, she has no experience. Mom should buy all hygiene products herself in sufficient quantities, give her daughter with her and show where they can be taken at home.

Moms often rely on the fact that their daughter goes to school all day, so they buy night pads or pads with a lot of drops. You can't do that. Overnight pads won't work because most of the absorbent gel is concentrated at the back of the pad. And during the day, the maximum degree of absorption in its central part is necessary. And pads with a large number of droplets will not teach the girl to hygiene, she will not even think that the pad needs to be changed more often.

Hygiene is very important, otherwise infection is likely. The girl's pad should be changed every time she goes to the toilet. Be sure to tell the child about the bath, what should be washed.

Many teenage girls have such a complex: they are afraid that menstruation will begin at school in the classroom and the whole class will find out about it. Mom can reinsure her daughter 2-3 days before the start of menstruation - buy daily pads that she will use and carry with her. In this case, the incident will not happen, the girl will feel calmer.

Also, the mother should tell her daughter about the menstrual calendar. It is better that mother and daughter bring him together. This will distract the girl herself from unnecessary worries, perhaps, will captivate and teach her to order. And it will be easier for mom to control the flow of menstruation.

Also, the child needs to be warned about the frequency of menstruation: despite the fact that it happens every month, it can shift slightly. Especially in the first months. If a girl waits for her in an equal number of days, and menstruation does not come, this can scare her very much.

It is necessary to accustom the girl to visits to the gynecologist

I advise you to see a gynecologist when the girl began the second cycle of menstruation - this will allow the doctor to compare the results with the first menstruation. Mom should instill in her daughter the habit of visiting a gynecologist and not be afraid of him. Today, I would say, there is even a problem: both young girls and adult women avoid visiting this specialist precisely because of fear.

Until now, there are mothers who are afraid to take their daughters to the gynecologist, explaining this by the fact that the girl is still a virgin. Let me explain: if a girl does not live sexually, no one examines her vaginally, only through the rectum. The hymen is not injured in any way. And here is a must-check.

Let's move on to puberty.

Well, if the mother communicates well with the gynecologist, in this case, you can agree that the doctor touched on the topic of puberty and sexual life. Most moms find it difficult to start a conversation about menstruation, let alone the topic of puberty ...

In adolescence, the words of parents can be perceived with hostility, and adolescents may fundamentally not listen to their information, and a gynecologist is a third party, an independent opinion. Yes, and then it will be easier for mom to continue this topic.

This conversation cannot be avoided, otherwise, due to lack of information, the child will go to friends and the Internet: read blogs, “dig” in social networks, where there is a lot of, to put it mildly, inaccurate information.

You should talk about sexual relations smoothly, metered, in the process of talking or watching a movie. You can give teenage encyclopedias to read so that the girl comes to something herself, and asks her mother for the rest.

Mom must prepare herself for this conversation, she must know what to say. And it is very important that all other family members know about the beginning of this conversation. Otherwise, if the information differs among family members, the girl may decide that someone is lying to her. The authority of the family and mother is lost. The girl will climb for answers to her questions on the Internet.

During this conversation, it is impossible to inspire the girl with fear of boys: "There will be frequent sexual intercourse - you will become pregnant, and the boys are all the same, all the guys leave." Unfortunately, this is what mothers often say to their daughters. And it is from here that problems arise in the future: a girl cannot have a relationship, cannot get married, she does not trust anyone, it is easier for her alone.

You need to gently tell your daughter that she will definitely have a loved one with whom she wants to build a serious relationship. He may not accept that his beloved was too active in sexual activity. What kind of reputation she will have, how she will look in his eyes ... Such words will impress the girl more and serve as a greater argument than stories about unwanted pregnancy.

Mom should be attentive and competent - only in this case can you win back authority from the Internet. I am very happy at receptions when I hear a girl say: “But my mother told me.”

If the daughter asked some kind of provocative question, there is no need to answer at random. You should say: "You asked a difficult question, I will think about it and answer you a little later." Consult, look and only then answer. Do not think that the child will forget about his question. The inattention of parents to the issues of children and adolescents greatly undermines the authority.

I would also recommend tracking the child's navigation on the web. There are many dangers on the Internet, ranging from pedophilia. It is necessary to talk with the girl that it is impossible to communicate with strange strangers, especially adults, that if this happened, then you should immediately tell your mother about it.

There is now a function on the Internet - a package of services "Parental Control". The basic package is free, and for an additional fee, you can even track messages on social networks.

For the first time, in order to calm down that the girl is not being dated by adult strangers, you can purchase this package. You can get a children's browser, but all this is only at the initial stages. Then children can still learn what they want and bypass parental control.

If a girl said she was going to get married - you need to support her

Now you can often see young couples. Then some little girls sincerely suffer because of breaking up with the first guy, even if they are only 8-9 years old. Parents should not treat this as nonsense. If, for example, your daughter says that she is getting married, tell her that you are happy, that you are waiting for an invitation to the wedding and that you will definitely come. It is important for a child to understand that his problems and interests are understood in the family.

Children show interest in the opposite sex. Do not be afraid of very early sexual intercourse, because they are physiologically impossible. Sexuality has stages of formation. The craving of an infant for its mother is also a certain stage in the formation of sexuality. At the age of 8-9, early dates and breakups are also a period of growing up.

Therefore, you can’t make fun of a child’s sadness and turn it into a joke, you need to support him and convince him that all the good things are yet to come.

The beginning of an intimate relationship - a conversation about contraception

If you find out that your daughter's sexual debut has taken place, you can't yell and grind - this won't change anything. You can say this: “I won’t say that I’m wildly happy, I thought it would happen later, but it happened, it’s your decision, you are entering adulthood, now you yourself (not only me and the gynecologist) are responsible for your health.” And here it is quite normal to talk to your daughter about contraception.

If you don’t know how to start a conversation with your child about intimate life, put a condom in a prominent place. She will see and ask - that's the conversation took place. Explain the importance of contraception to avoid not only early pregnancy but also disease and infection.

Now there is a protective vaccine, it is also intended for adolescents - a vaccine against the human papillomavirus (HPV), against some of its strains, which, among other things, cause cervical cancer. The vaccine should be given before the onset of sexual activity. Approximately 9-10 years old. This is great prevention.

Mothers often worry that with their conversation about intimate life and contraception, they conditionally give the “green light” to their daughter for promiscuity. This is an absolutely wrong point of view. On the contrary, what is unknown, secret, is always more attractive than what is openly discussed with you. You don't have to give your daughter a condom right away. Let her just know where you can find protective equipment at home. Because in which case the girl will not go to the pharmacy to buy a condom - she is shy and afraid.

By the way, early sexual relations in girls arise due to lack of attention, most often the father. This is already a proven fact. The girl is just looking for this attention from the opposite sex.

Mom should be clearly aware that sooner or later everything will happen to her daughter: both menstruation and sexual life. And the girl should be ready for this. Therefore, you need to approach the conversation with your daughter consciously, with the understanding that both the sexual and psychological health of the child depends on your words and delicacy. And, consequently, her future as a woman, wife and mother.

Since today communication between mothers and daughters on the topic of growing up is really a problem (and this is more a problem of society than of specific women, because we basically lack the continuity of competent sexual education), we have opened in the Family Health Academy.

I hope they will help many women to bring their daughters into adulthood as competently as possible.

I broke my head when and how to bring my daughter up to date. I found an article, maybe it will come in handy for someone?

Growing up is a natural and inevitable process in the life of any child. One of the main signs of a girl growing up is menstruation. The beginning of the menstrual cycle can be a serious psychological trauma for a girl if she is not prepared for such changes. Therefore, it is very important to have a conversation with your daughter in advance and talk about the features of the female body. In this regard, many parents are wondering when and, most importantly, how to tell the girl about menstruation.

When should you talk about menstruation?

It is worth telling a girl about menstruation when your daughter is 9-10 years old. It is best if this confidential conversation is conducted by the mother. If this is not possible, then the grandmother or older sister can also talk to the child about this topic. In extreme cases, you can contact the school doctor to inform the girl about the upcoming changes in her body.

What do you need to talk about?

So where do you start this conversation? How to tell your daughter about menstruation? First of all, it is necessary to talk with the girl about the structure of the female body, explain what physiological processes occur as a result of growing up and what is the reason for the onset of menstruation. It is very important that the child understands that the menstrual cycle is a natural process, and not a disease at all. Explain that every girl inevitably experiences this phenomenon as she grows up. The onset of menstruation only means that your daughter is becoming a girl.

Does it hurt?

During the conversation, do not focus on the painful sensations that may accompany menstruation. Of course, we should not keep silent about the fact that certain pain manifestations are possible, but they are not significant and most often do not interfere with the usual way of life.

Premenstrual syndrome

It is very important to tell the girl about premenstrual syndrome. Your child must understand that weakness and excessive irritability before the onset of menstruation are just the consequences of hormonal changes in the body. Understanding the reason for such feelings, your daughter will more easily endure this unpleasant condition.

Hygiene

One of the most important topics of your upcoming conversation with your daughter is the problem of hygiene. During menstruation, the female intimate microflora is especially vulnerable to a variety of infections. Be sure to explain to the girl that on “critical days” it is necessary to take a shower twice a day, and at the beginning of the cycle it is preferable to wash every 4 hours (and, of course, change the pad after a shower).

Do not forget to tell your daughter about what hygiene products (pads, tampons) women use during menstruation. At first, of course, it is better to offer the girl to use pads.

Mom, when will I be an adult?

Most often, menstruation in girls begins at 11 - 13 years. But, of course, there are exceptions. Depending on individual characteristics, the first menstrual cycle may begin a little earlier, for example, at 10 years old, or later - at 14 years old. Late onset of menstruation can be observed in girls who are overweight or, conversely, in girls who are underweight.

When to sound the alarm?

During adolescence, the duration of menstruation may change periodically, and delays in menstruation (up to 14 days) are also likely. But there are some points that signal that the girl needs to be shown to the doctor. Be sure to consult a gynecologist if your daughter is already 15 years old and her period has not yet begun. And also in the event that the delay in menstruation lasts 3 months or more, and menstruation lasts longer than 7 days.

Ticket to life

A confidential conversation about menstruation is a good opportunity to talk to a girl about pregnancy. Do not be afraid to discuss such sensitive topics with your daughter. It's necessary. Your daughter deserves to enter adulthood with valuable knowledge that will help her avoid many problems in the future and stay healthy.

Growing up child is very difficult. His body is changing, his ideas about life, about the world, about himself are changing ... A million questions arise, including those on intimate, delicate topics. The first menstruation in girls is a vivid example of such a topic.

The answer to this question should be sought in the medical encyclopedia and it is directly related to the timing of adolescent puberty. Most likely, the first menstruation will begin in a young girl no earlier than 12 years old, however, it is necessary to prepare her for this moment in advance, perhaps as early as 10-11 years old. It is this age that is very good for such a conversation about changes in the growing female body and about the first menstruation.

Of course, children's curiosity should not be dismissed at an earlier age. If a child notices blood on women's clothing or a pack of hygiene items and asks for reasons, answer briefly that this is due to menstruation.

And is it really worth it?

Even if it seems to the mother that her daughter is still quite a baby, you should not neglect this topic - otherwise menstruation can take her by surprise and puzzle, or even scare. Talking to your daughter about menstruation is a difficult test for the mother's psyche, however, this conversation is necessary. But in order for it to take place, it is necessary that there be spiritual intimacy and mutual understanding between mother and daughter. Do you know what your baby is reading or listening to? Who does she like and who does she dislike? If you are aware of her thoughts, problems, everyday life, telling a girl about her period will not be so difficult. If you are late with your explanation, then it will not be easy to tell your mother about.

How exactly should you tell a girl about menstruation?

No one knows the characteristics of a girl better than her parents, especially her mother. Think about it, is she shy or bold? Curious or not? And based on this, think about what and how you will say. You can explain to a child at different levels and in completely different ways.

Most likely, it is worth starting a conversation with a description of the female reproductive system - what are its main parts called? What is their purpose? Speak confidently - your shyness and shame can lead to fears and complexes that can poison the life of your maturing daughter. Tell us about menstruation from the point of view of physiology - what is this process for? why is it important?

Be prepared for both an abundance of questions and their complete absence. Both of those are perfectly normal. Try to dose information, do not overload your speech with unnecessary details.

Who should do it?

Of course, ideally, a woman should tell a child what menstruation is - a mother, an aunt, an older sister. The one that the girl trusts, and with whom she has developed a spiritual intimacy. Sometimes girls do not even realize that men are also aware that women have menstruation and therefore it does not occur to them to ask their father or brothers with this question. Therefore, if for some reason there are no authoritative women in the family, then dads need to tell the girl about menstruation especially delicately. As a last resort, you can rely on anatomy lessons at school, but this is not at all serious! Menstruation in adolescents can be accompanied by pain and shame, it is stressful and a serious problem - it should not be minimized or ignored.

It is possible and necessary to tell the girl about menstruation in parallel with the conversation about sexuality and contraception. Draw her attention to the fact that after the onset of menstruation, a young girl is able to become pregnant, tell her about how to avoid unwanted pregnancy. Another important aspect is PMS, this issue should also be raised in the conversation. What happens to a woman's psyche before menstruation can also be quite unexpected for a girl, and the issues of "mental hygiene" during PMS should also be discussed.

When you tell your child what menstruation is, do not forget to clarify the time frame. The girl must understand that this process will occur in her body every month until about 50 years old.

It is stupid to hush up the issue of soreness, but it’s not worth scaring the girl ahead of time, suddenly she is lucky and it is her menstruation that will occur painlessly. Warn her that possible discomfort is completely normal, tell her what medicine can be taken and how exactly to alleviate her condition.

Likbez

Tell your child about what menstruation is in the right terms. Every month, one of the follicles contained in the ovaries becomes the leader, it grows and at some point ruptures. The egg contained in it is picked up by the villi of the corresponding fallopian tube - right or left - and gradually enters the uterine cavity. The mucous membrane inside the uterus grows, becomes soft, it is pierced by blood vessels designed to nourish the unborn baby. If in a month the egg does not meet with the sperm and fertilization does not occur, then this overgrown layer of the epithelium is gradually rejected and comes out along with the unused egg. This process is called menstruation.

Hygiene and life

Pay the girl's attention to the abundance of hygiene products, let her choose what is best for her over time. menstrual flow- a delicacy for microorganisms, their vital activity causes an unpleasant odor and can be harmful to health. Teach the girl to always have a pad with her - with an unstable cycle, menstruation can begin suddenly. Having become a little older, the girl will learn to anticipate their onset by a number of the smallest individual signs. It will also be useful to keep a short diary of menstruation, marking on the calendar the time of their onset, the duration and intensity of the discharge.

Instead of output

Your girl is growing up and after a while you will smile, remembering how difficult it was to decide. Take care of a young girl, treat her femininity with respect and reciprocal trust will not take long!

It seems that there is simply nothing to explain about menstruation, the daughter will understand everything herself. In fact, how the girl will accept new changes in herself depends on the reaction of the mother and her ability to correctly present information about menstruation.

Just yesterday you rocked your baby in your arms and braided her funny pigtails. And today your girl is preparing to become a woman in every sense. How to tell a girl about her period?

It seemed that there was still so much time ahead before she grew up. It happened imperceptibly both for her and for you. You understand that it's time to introduce her to some of the features of female physiology.

How to find the exact words that would help your daughter understand herself and accept all new changes with the least discomfort?

How to tell your daughter about the first period - do not stand aside

Now there are no problems in order to obtain the necessary information. Always at the service of the Internet. Each article, each video can tell the child everything that is needed about menstruation, without missing a single detail.

It seems that there is simply nothing to explain about menstruation, the daughter will understand everything herself. Actually it is not. You can not stand aside when your child begins a new period of growing up. After all, it is known that it is the mother who is the closest person who can support and understand.

Understanding your child, the mental characteristics of his personality through Yuri Burlan's Systemic Vector Psychology helps to discard false embarrassment and not make mistakes in such a delicate topic.

important conversation

Not all girls quickly adapt to the changes that occur with their body. It scares some people, it repels others. And someone wants it all to just “turn off” and return to its former carefree course.

And here an important role is played by the trusting relationship between the child and the mother. It is the mother’s word that can calm and inspire confidence if the mother accurately understands the peculiarities of the psyche of her child. Information about menstruation should be given in exactly the form that the young owner of one or another vector will most favorably perceive.

For example, if your daughter has, it may be difficult for her to accept changes in her body due to her slowness and not very high adaptability. But if you help her understand the meaning of what is happening through her basic values, she will carry her role as a future woman with pride and dignity.

What are these core values? A girl with an anal vector dreams of a future marriage and a happy family from a young age. You can tell her that the changes taking place are preparing her body for the future role of a mother. It is important that this information should not contain sexual overtones - you should not immediately explain about unprotected sex, abortion and other horror stories.

The first menstruation - the main thing is not to faint

And the young owner of the skin-visual bundle of vectors has completely different desires and values ​​- you need to talk to her differently. Able to quickly adapt changes in her body due to the properties, she can be afraid of what is happening, as she has.

Visual children are easy to identify. The most emotional, the most vulnerable. Now they are happy, light and content with the world and themselves, but after a moment they are sad or even cry. They are able to see especially brightly the entire palette of colors and enjoy color, light and beauty like no other. They can see beauty in everything, even where others see nothing.

They are shy from birth, they are always ready to inflate an elephant out of a fly or invent a bunch of non-existent diseases for themselves and sacredly believe in it. The hormonal background of such girls is very fragile. It is they who faint when they discover sudden bleeding. A rich imagination instantly draws a close death from blood loss. At such moments, all the arguments of reason are powerless. By understanding the nature of fear, you can protect any child with a visual vector from injury.

The special fear of death is the root of all fears in the visual vector. By properly raising a child, this fear can be transformed into the opposite feeling - empathy for others, the ability to build emotional ties and respond to someone else's misfortune.

How does this help with the story of menstruation? If the mother does not focus on all the physiological "horrors", the visual daughter will more easily perceive this process, because she will not be fixated on herself and her condition. It is enough to unload her emotions during this period by directing them in a different direction, for example, into some abstract matters related to helping someone, compassion for someone.

And such a girl will certainly be pleased with the news that she is becoming more mature and independent and will soon be able to wear the same beautiful outfits as her mother. To become a woman for a visual girl is to become beautiful.

Convey the best

Much depends on the reaction of the mother and her ability to correctly submit information about menstruation. Not only how the girl will accept new changes in herself, but also how she will relate to sexual life in the future. At first glance, this moment is not monitored and remains hidden for a grown daughter for a very long time, partially influencing her life scenario.

If a mother talked about the peculiarities of female physiology as a punishment for a woman, or herself reacted to them with shame or as a difficult test: “I am suffering, my daughter, now your time has come to suffer,” this will definitely affect her daughter, her feeling like a woman.

Your conversation will be remembered by your daughter for many years. Therefore, if you are not sure of yourself, it may be better to give the girl a book on the topic of puberty and offer your comments if something is not clear.

But not only through talking about menstruation, the mother conveys the image of a woman to her daughter. Therefore, it is better if the upcoming conversation with her daughter becomes a serious reason for the mother herself to think about her attitude towards sexuality and femininity. Think about it and not pass on your anchors, clamps and delusions to your growing daughter.

Universal Recipe

The system-vector psychology of Yuri Burlan explains that the success of any educational event is based on only two postulates:

the psychological comfort of the mother herself (in our case, her positive attitude towards female physiology and sexuality);

psychological literacy of the mother (that is, knowledge about the nature of the psyche of her child, the ability to choose the right approach).

Having mastered the method of systemic thinking, they not only found answers to their questions about education, but were also able to get rid of the burden of their own negative experience in order to pass on only the best to their children. Here's what some of them say:

Any mother wants her daughter to grow up and experience true female happiness. And any mother is able to understand how to help her with this. Start with free online lectures on system-vector psychology by Yuri Burlan. Register now.