Beauty is not the main thing in life, or How can an ugly woman survive? Notes of an ugly woman. About Life and Death The life of ugly people

“What if the child was born ugly?” Parents shared candid stories and photos

There was a serious chat on Reddit about how parents feel when they realize that their child is not as beautiful and charming as they thought. Despite the tragedy of the situation, many reacted to everything with humor.

A Reddit user asked people how they felt when they realized that their child was ugly. Surprisingly, there were quite a few detailed and honest answers. Some people even posted photos of their newborn babies at the hospital.

My daughter was born with this funny nose. I gasped when I saw her at the hospital. It was terrible, I couldn't help but notice it. The nose looked like a goddamn beak. Fortunately, it turned out that her nose was just swollen when they tried to push her out of me for 26 hours.

My eldest son was born 55 centimeters long and weighed three kilograms. Long and thin. With thick black hair all over the body and a cone-shaped head. When I first saw him, I cried. I was so upset. I told my mom that he looks like I slept with a monkey. Luckily, it looks much better now.

Now my six year old son is adorable. But when he was born, he was just ugly. He was a cross between a frog and a monkey. No. He had a hairy forehead until six months old. Then bam! And he became cute. But even when he was hairy, I loved him just as much.

This happened to my niece. She looked like a wiry alien mixed with Danny DeVito. Now that she's eight, she looks like Hermione from the first Harry Potter.

I think 95% of babies are malformed at birth. I naturally thought that my daughter was the most beautiful creature on the planet. "Thank God we had a cute baby." Six months later, looking back and looking through old photographs, I realized that I was wrong. What a strange creature. She looked like a tiny, grumpy Churchill (that's what we called her until she was nine months old). She is now three and adorable.

What if I'm ugly - such a question, according to statistics, was asked at least once in their lives by 80% of all women, and the remaining 20 were asked, but never, they will not admit it to anyone. Whether it's good or bad, but physical beauty is a much more significant factor for a woman than for a man.

This has been the case in the past, and it is unlikely that anything will change significantly in the foreseeable future, so women's feelings about this are quite understandable.

However, at the same time, a complaining woman is far from always able to answer what her ugliness actually lies in. In order to understand the problem, let's first understand what beauty is.

To the point

You can often hear that beauty is in the eye of the beholder, hinting at the subjective nature of the concept of harmony. This is not entirely true. Beauty is a completely objective thing. If you like, the ability to feel beautiful can be called the sixth sense. Oh no, nothing paranormal. Beauty is a sense of expediency inherent in us by nature. What is beautiful is what is perfectly adapted to its environment.

As for a person, a beautiful person is, first of all, of course, a healthy person who does not have obvious signs of illness and injury. Secondly, a proportionately folded body is perceived as beautiful.

And it's not about the notorious " 90/60/90", But about the ratio of the sizes of the torso, limbs and other parts of the body. Attempts to calculate ideal proportions can be seen in the famous drawings attributed to Leonardo da Vinci.

Please note that it is the attitude, proportion, and not the absolute size that “makes beauty”, any part of the body can be beautiful (or not) only in a complex. Therefore, it is foolish to argue whether large breasts or small breasts are more beautiful, and discuss how long the legs are ugly, and which ones are vice versa.

A large woman with large breasts will be beautiful, and a petite girl with the same breasts will look like a vacuum cleaner hose stuffed with two apples. Similarly, the question " What should I do about ugly knees?”, knees cannot be beautiful or ugly in and of themselves.

It remains to say a few words about the so-called beauty patterns. This phenomenon has a rather remote relation to beauty itself. By and large, this is nothing more than a fashion for a certain “exterior” of a male or female body, fixed in mass culture and broadcast by it to fragile minds.

These templates change with enviable regularity, sometimes turning into their own complete opposite. Compare, for example, Rubensian donuts and modern models with the figures of teenage girls.

Patterns have even less in common with attractiveness than with beauty (attractiveness and beauty are not identical, more on that below), and this was proved by the input of a curious experiment. The researchers selected a group of men of various ages, belonging to different social and professional groups, professing different religions, etc.

During the test, various indicators were continuously monitored to assess the level of sexual arousal - pulse, heartbeat, respiratory rate, pupil dilation. During the experiment, men were shown photos and videos of women.

So it turned out that women who correspond to generally accepted beauty patterns (top models, fashion models, actresses, singers, winners of beauty contests) evoke much less response in the hearts and other parts of the body of men than the most ordinary women, who were research center workers, university students where the experiment was conducted, and female volunteers literally from the street.

Some of the men were aroused by plump ones, some by thin ones, some by athletic ones, tall and short, only “correct” - almost no one.

Getting beautiful

We found out that beauty is:

  • first, health;
  • secondly - the proportionality of the physique.

Now you can understand why a particular girl is ugly, and what can be done about it. Just first, let's think, is it necessary to do something at all? As we have already mentioned, "beautiful" is not at all the same as " attractive».

How is it possible, because if beauty is expediency, then the most expedient, most adapted to the conditions of the environment representative of the species should be the most attractive partner for procreation?

Not really. Let's remember what the biological meaning is in the division of the sexes. Nature is constantly experimenting, making changes to the genetic code. Viable, beneficial changes are fixed and passed on to offspring.

Small (without obvious signs of viability) deviations from the average species just indicate the genetic experiments of nature. Men, by their very nature, will never miss an opportunity to participate in an experiment.

If it were not for this built-in mechanism for purposefully testing small deviations for viability, evolution would follow the path of extensive improvement of one species, and no development of new forms would be simply impossible. So a slight deviation from the image of the average beauty is your undoubted trump card, use it.

Working on ourselves

However, you should not indulge yourself with illusions, they say, mother nature created me this way, so love me for who I am! No. What to do with ugly legs or overweight - any representative of the beautiful half of humanity knows: sports, diet, absence of bad habits and a balanced daily routine.

What to do with an ugly smile - you can check with your dentist. With ugly hair and nails, a nutritionist and masters in a beauty salon will help you cope.

You can sit endlessly and complain about fate and envy beauties, or you can gather your will into a fist and start working on your appearance, intellect, manners and character. Believe that after that you will not want to utter maxims, like " I'm an ugly girl and nothing can be done about it

Now about what exactly is not attractive. Of course, you need to do something with an ugly, unkempt, painful look - armpit diaper rash, wrinkles, skin irritations will not decorate you!

Of course, there is nothing beautiful about being overweight, but the fight against excess weight is a separate big topic. As well as an arsenal of female tricks to hide minor signs of ill health. But what if your body does not have the correct proportions? Knowledge of the “golden section”, which we have already mentioned in passing, comes to the rescue.

We comprehend harmony with algebra

« golden ratio called the ratio of two parts of one whole. We will not overload readers with mathematics, let's say that the closest to " golden ratio' is a ratio of two to three (2/3). Attitude of what? Yes, anything that consists of two parts or that can be conditionally divided into two parts. For example, the ratio of the length of the arm from the collarbone to the elbow to the length from the elbow to the fingertips.

But the most noticeable and most influencing the perception of beauty is the ratio of the upper body (from the crown to the waist) to the lower (from the waist to the ground). While you are in clothes, the role of the dividing line between "top" and "bottom" is played by the belt, belt, border of trousers and T-shirts.

Moving this transverse border affects the appearance of the girl is simply stunning. Moreover, both in one direction and in the other. You must have seen girls with not very long legs, which the low waist of jeans makes just “square”.

How to properly define where to do the waist"? This is where the golden ratio 2/3 comes in handy. We measure our height necessarily (!) With a heel. We divide it by 5, I propose to name the resulting number L, in honor of Leonardo. So: the distance from the crown to the “middle” (not to your real waist, but to the visible border) should be 2L, from the middle to the ground - 3L.

Of course, this can only be your opinion, which is actually far from the truth. It's rare to meet really ugly people. It is important to understand that everyone has their own characteristics, and to perceive their far-fetched or real shortcomings precisely as features.

I consider myself ugly, how to be

Once Coco Chanel, who is now considered an icon of style, said: "If a woman is ugly, then she is simply stupid." Even in those days, there were many ways to highlight your best sides, and de-emphasize your shortcomings. At the present time, the fair sex has many opportunities to improve their appearance.

Realize that if you are ugly, then this is your choice. Want to get more compliments and love your reflection in the mirror? So, you need to act! Determine what features you are unhappy with, make a plan with points in which you write down how you can fix this or that problem. Now, with this plan in place, get to work!

Complexes or imperfect appearance

In fact, your lack of confidence in your own appearance can only be a complex that someone once instilled in you. You were pointed out to some kind of "flaw" and you believed in it.

Many of your "imperfections" that you are embarrassed by people may not notice at all or may not consider them as such. Such self-doubt speaks of low self-esteem, and a visit to a psychologist can normalize the situation.

Probably, many have heard stories about stars who, having a beautiful appearance, remained dissatisfied with themselves or complexed about their passing youth, going under the knife of a plastic surgeon. As a result, the appearance, which seemed to be the reference for millions of people, was simply spoiled. Such celebrities include Renee Zellweger, Lara Flynn Boyle, Melanie Griffith, Meg Ryan and many others. Surely, these women decided on the operation, ceasing to consider themselves beautiful. Look at the photos of these actresses before plastic surgery, and make sure that their claims to themselves were very far-fetched.

How to understand that you are a beautiful girl

One of the main criteria in this matter is the compliments of others. If people periodically point out the advantages of your appearance, then apparently you are really beautiful.

There are simply no certain patterns of beauty. The ideal changes every decade, and each culture has completely different ideas about female beauty.

However, note that beauty does not always carry charisma, charm, sexuality, or intelligence. It is wonderful if you have undeniable external and internal virtues, but if you are deprived of physical beauty, you can be no less successful in all areas of life than written beauties.

Surely, you have often heard stories about how men leave their beautiful wives for the sake of seemingly completely inconspicuous persons. Many people ask themselves: “What did he find in her?” However, when you watch such women live, everything becomes obvious - they are so charming, smart, sexy and attractive that the external “commonness” ceases to be such.

And this effect happens quite often. You may hear about some woman that he is very beautiful, but when you see her in the first second, you do not understand the general enthusiasm. When you begin to observe such a woman, you suddenly also begin to notice her beauty. It's all about charm - they are not born with it, but actively develop it.

How to love yourself if I'm fat

If excess weight really upsets you, then there is only one way out - to get rid of it. Perhaps you think that you are doing everything possible, but the hated kilograms remain in place. So it's not true, and you're not doing your best, in other words, you're not trying hard enough.

Girls who cannot lose weight are either not motivated enough or have health problems. To exclude the second option, be examined by an endocrinologist, nutritionist, gastroenterologist.

Set yourself a deadline for losing weight. For example, you can read the stories of girls who lost their personal weight. There are many groups of this orientation in VK, where you can see the results “Before” and “After”, and make sure that with the right degree of desire and perseverance, you can also find the desired forms.

What to do if I have an ugly face (long nose, bad skin, small breasts)

Many believe that at least 50 percent of beauty is completely different qualities - not at all the nose or chest. If you have well-groomed hair, clean skin, healthy teeth and a slender body, then you can at least be considered a pretty girl or woman. All these points are quite achievable if you really want it.

There are several large sites on the Internet where girls leave detailed reviews with photographs of how they managed to grow their hair or bring it to its perfect condition. There you will also find information about skin care, sports activities and healthy diets.

Also on the Internet there is a lot of information on how to visually smooth out certain imperfections.

Plastic surgery is the way

If this is not enough for you, and some part of the body or face is seriously poisoning your life, it looks like it's time to think about surgery. Many women, for example, having undergone rhinoplasty, admit that they are very sorry that they did not take this step earlier. Contact a specialist and find out his opinion - do you really need an operation.

Consider possible risks. If plastic surgery remains your only option, choose your clinic carefully. Look for real reviews, try to get in touch with the clients of the institution through a social network, asking them about all the "pitfalls" of the operation. Often, such interventions are not cheap, and if you do not have the required amount, then this is not a reason to be upset. Many clinics carry out the operation on credit, "breaking" the payment into several payments.

I don't like my height - am I too tall or short

No matter how tall you are, look for the good in it. High and low growth are good in their own way. Tall girls often envy petite girlfriends, and those, on the contrary, are dissatisfied with their petiteness, dreaming of adding more than a dozen centimeters in height.

To make it easier to gain self-confidence, find information about celebrities who are about the same height as you. They often look great and don't seem to have any self-esteem issues. See what these stars are wearing, what style and hairstyles they prefer, and try to get closer to these canons.

How to live an ugly woman

What to do to love yourself

Realize that there is no second you in the world and that's great! Perhaps your appearance really has some flaws, but why did you decide that they deserve more attention than your virtues?

Pay attention to your strengths, emphasize them, and focus on them. Behave confidently, and this will favorably affect the attitude of others. Probably, many girls have noticed such a phenomenon: a girl who is ugly in your opinion behaves confidently and even a little defiantly, and at the same time she has a wonderful personal life, and many fans seek her attention. Self-confidence sometimes attracts much more than external beauty.

Tricks of make-up and reincarnations with the help of clothes

There are many videos on the Web that demonstrate how even the most nondescript person can turn into a magazine cover model after applying makeup correctly. Now there are many techniques, cosmetic products and salon procedures available that can significantly change the appearance for the better. Watch some video tutorials and you will understand that these skills are not difficult to master at all!

Clothing, like makeup, is designed not only to hide nudity from others and escape from the cold, but also to draw attention to your winning sides, emphasize skin tone, visually enhance hair color, add or hide volumes in the right places and the like.

Determine your color type according to numerous tables on the Internet and read which shades suit you. It is quite possible that earlier, for some reason, you avoided, for example, pink, without even suspecting that combinations with it are the most suitable for you.

Examples of successful imperfect stars (movie or Hollywood) who became famous because of or despite their imperfections

There are many women in the world who cannot boast of a perfect appearance, but very few pay attention to it. However, if there are such, then these women do not care about their opinion, because they have achieved fame, recognition and success, despite criticism. Let's talk about some of them.

This woman is successful, rich and has many fans around the world. What made her so? At first glance, it is difficult to call the face of this actress ideal, but when you start to watch how she speaks, looks, moves, laughs, you forget that her appearance is not ideal.

In the 60s of the last century, she even played in the film "Funny Girl". This is a biographical film about the real person of Fanny Brice, who, despite many features of her appearance (strabismus, big nose, etc.), managed to become a real Broadway star. Barbara saw many similarities with Fanny in herself, but, like the prototype of the film, Streisand managed to achieve success, despite external shortcomings.

When Winnie was a child, she often had to catch other people's eyes on herself, and the reason for this was her Vitiligo disease. The girl had to face ridicule and insults, and she no longer expected anything good from life until she pulled herself together and showed willpower. Having matured, the Jamaican native went to the show "America's Next Top Model", instantly captivating its creators. The girl managed to become famous in America and abroad, having entered into many expensive contracts. Now she is in demand, successful and famous, but once people around her called her a cow, because of the white spots on the dark skin of her face and body.

Now this graceful Englishwoman regularly flashes on large screens, being for many women the standard of elegance. Surely, for Tilda herself, it is strange to be in such a status, because, according to her, in her childhood she was not perceived as a girl. The actress notes that she decided to "turn off sexuality", but this did not save her from the attention of the public, and it's all about incredible charisma!

The popular actress has heard criticism from her childhood and continues to hear it to this day, but this did not stop her from becoming a world-famous star. Moreover, he is a happy mother and wife. In addition, in her youth, Parker was in a long-term relationship with one of the first beauties of Hollywood - Robert Downey Jr., and today she is a real style icon!

How to live with an ugly appearance? How to live an ugly woman

Hello. I am 21 years old, female. I suffer from severe depression. The thing is, I'm very ugly. From childhood, the school was haunted by ridicule, endless nicknames, mockery. The boys scoffed: “I won’t sit at the same desk with this ugly woman!” I started to hate myself, became shy, downtrodden. She dropped out of university, as she could not concentrate on her studies due to constant depression and depression.

After I fell in love unrequitedly with a guy who, as I accidentally found out, said behind his back that he had nothing against me, but I was just terribly ugly, and he would not meet with me, she wanted to commit suicide. I gave up everything, lost all desire to live. However, she overcame herself and found a job. There, I accidentally overheard a conversation of work colleagues who discussed me, called me as terrible as an atomic war. Crocodile, scary, ugly - in ten years of such reviews about myself, I stopped feeling like a man.

The consolations that they say appearance is not the main thing do not help much - until I met a guy who would prefer an ugly-looking girl to a pretty one. Not everyone mocked me at all - but friendly relations - that's all you can count on. Love, sex - apparently, this is for others, not for people like me. At 21, I'm still a virgin. There were some cases when they offered sex, but these were men older than me, completely uninteresting, who did not even try to please me, but simply expected that someone like me would not refuse, no courtship was needed.

One even openly said about me: "And this freak still poses like God knows what." Apparently, people like me have nothing to rely on love, compliments, courtship. I feel like nobody. I'm tired of life. I just don't see the point anymore. Probably, people like me sooner or later get used to their ugliness and live. I can't. I can't feel inferior, ugly, tired of being neglected as a woman. When I see pretty peers who are surrounded by fans and attention, I am ready to scream in desperation.

How to live with an ugly appearance? To live and not to exist? Thank you if you've read all of this.

psy-help.com

How to live an ugly woman - Women's Club "Chocolate Mood"

Have you noticed that even very ugly women are happy in love, and hand-written beauties sit alone? Does our happiness always depend on appearance?

"I am 20 years old. I suffer a lot from loneliness and self-doubt. Pen has a very small stature, a round, inexpressive face. Against the background of tall beautiful songs, I look terrible. Am I going to be alone all my life and no one will pay attention to me? The authors of these letters - very young girls and already mature women - are tormented by their disorder, the cause of which they see in a failed appearance. Is appearance always to blame? Psychologist Maria Makarushkina will try to reflect on this today.

Doctor, cut off my ears!

And why did God give me this terrible wide nose? They say a big nose is a sign of kindness, but why do I need such kindness? And the small dim eyes? If "the eyes are the mirror of the soul", then, then, the soul ... It's better not to think further. How many tears have been shed because of inexpressive eyes, but too expressive noses! But are we that bad? Is plastic surgery the only salvation from bitter lamentations about cruel nature? Fortunately, this is not the case, you just need to seriously work on yourself.

Probably, everyone is familiar with flirtatious women, convinced of their irresistible attractiveness, who, with very modest external data, have a lot of fans and are never alone. The secret is simple - these women are unconditionally confident in their value, in their abilities and charm. For the people we deal with, our own opinion of ourselves is incredibly important. We will not be appreciated if we do not appreciate ourselves. It is known that most of the top models of the world's catwalks in real life are "gray mice" - discreet, ordinary. Their main advantage is the ability to transform, take on different images with the help of makeup, clothes and ... self-hypnosis. “I thought I was very ugly. I had tiny breasts, too thin legs. I went crazy with these experiences. It took a long time for my photographer friend to convince me to try shooting. Several years of work as a model have changed my self-esteem so much that I now look at the same forms with pleasure, ”says the famous photo model Marina B with a smile. So, if you are determined to cut something, cut it better ears, so as not to hear the opinions of others about themselves, sometimes completely wrong.

Kingdom of Crooked Mirrors

The criteria for beauty are extremely diverse, the boundaries between ugliness and ideal are blurred. They get married, as life shows, and full, and thin, and hunchbacked. Men, enchanted, in love, simply do not attach importance to these features. And for the vast majority of them, spiritual, intellectual qualities mean much more than height, fullness or expressionless eyes. There are a lot of tastes, as well as opinions.

Are we as ugly as we think? We live in the kingdom of crooked mirrors. Mirrors are distorted by parental instructions, the first events, the first communication with the boys. Our first experience either disfigures us or embellishes us. One careless word can leave a mark for life in the soul of a teenager. From a letter: “I remember the day well - my mother and I are standing at the entrance to the entrance and the neighbor says to my mother:“ Dear, what handsome guys you have, why is it so unlucky with your daughter! ”I grew up with a feeling of my ugliness and I got so used to it that I could not believe the men who confessed their love to me. It is strange for me to hear from people the words that they considered me the first beauty of the institute. I don't know how to deal with this. Lena".

And here is a more prosperous illustration from a letter from a 15-year-old schoolgirl: “I used to consider my appearance not very pleasant. But when a very handsome guy began to meet with me, I changed my attitude towards myself. Now I like myself and am confident in myself one hundred percent!

Do not waste energy on fruitless regrets about the lack of long legs and thick hair! Play with your image, find a new, more attractive role for yourself (remember your favorite actress). And you will see how your appearance will change.

Beauty is a terrible force

At different times, different peoples treated the concept of beauty differently.

  • For example, the Evi-Guayega Indians considered white missionaries to be very ugly: “To become a man, you need to paint yourself. One who does not do this is no different from an animal.”
  • Modern Hindu women's haircuts are seen as a traditional sign of widowhood, and not as an expression of secular elegance.
  • White teeth adorn a person, although there are peoples who hold a different opinion. Dusuns from Boris Island still believe that the main advantage of a beautiful mouth is black teeth, and from infancy they smear them with resin.
  • The only point where the peoples of the earth converge in their tastes is the observance of the rules of hygiene. Neatness and cleanliness everywhere is a sine qua non of good looks and the key to success with men.

chocolady.club

And how to live us, ugly?

Every woman has her own opinion about her appearance. Most often, this opinion is not voiced in public, but we all know about ourselves how to evaluate our face.

Someone with satisfaction recognizes himself as "beautiful". Someone ironically believes that it looks "so-so". Someone is content with "pretty". And someone sighs bitterly at the mirror. Ugly.

I sincerely consider myself ugly. Not that ugly, but just where is Oksana Fedorova, and where am I ...

That doesn't stop me from being married to the most handsome guy in our year, raising two stunningly handsome daughters, having a couple of ardent admirers, and being intimate friends with men.

Still, this does not prevent me from making a career in almost all the jobs that I have to find myself.

And yet: shyness unsuitable for an adult, a powerful inferiority complex, dislike for photography and hatred for mirrors - I constantly have to fight all this for life and death.

Let's face it: beautiful people (not only women, but also men) have a much easier life.

Recent studies by regular American scientists have experimentally proved that men are much more likely to pay attention to beautiful women and make decisions in their favor when hiring, when choosing a business partner, when arranging a family.

And ugly - they are perceived as candidates of the second stage.

I just recently read in one article devoted just to the problems of ugly people: “You will say that appearance plays a role in a career. Yes, there are professions where external data may be required when applying for a job: personal assistant, secretary, etc.

But for those who work at the telephone exchange, at the machine, behind the counter, is it really necessary to have unearthly beauty?

Many business leaders are not concerned with how their employees look. For them, it is more important how they perform their duties.” Reassured, my dears, thank you very much from all the ugly people!

The only remark: beauty is a very streamlined concept. It is clear that Oksana Fedorova is a beauty, this is confirmed at the international level. But each of us can be beautiful - just looking at what catwalks.

I once complained to my boyfriend: "Now, if I were beautiful, like Sharon Stone ...", to which he replied: "Well, firstly, Sharon Stone is not beautiful, and secondly, I like you more."

As they say, the main thing is to find a person for whom you will be better than Sharon Stone.

So we, ugly, can only live like this: straightening our shoulders, straightening up, proudly carrying our exuberant head through life, with a clear realization that we are very beautiful women, and those who do not understand this are a fool himself.

VELVET: Anna Sevyarynets

www.velvet.by

how to live with an ugly face

Requests for help

Write your story

Hello. Tell me, how to live with an ugly appearance? The thing is, it's terrible. This is not only my opinion, other people often tell me about this .. even my loved one said that I am not beautiful on the outside, but beautiful on the inside. Although it is believed that all people are beautiful in their own way .. or the fact that the inner world is more important, in my opinion this is all nonsense. Like it or not, but people first of all pay attention to appearance. Outwardly beautiful people are more loved, a positive attitude towards them subconsciously develops. It is a fact. And not beautiful people like me, it's hard to live. I have many complexes. I was often teased as a child. I don't know how to live with it. I have a huge nose, there is no way to do without plastic surgery, but my parents are against it. I don’t understand why .. why other people can enjoy life, have many fans, but I can’t. Lately I have stopped believing in God. Since such injustice is happening in the world, it means that He does not exist. Apparently I was just unlucky .. Support the site:

Olya, age: 17/28.06.2013

Ridiculously upset because of beauty. Do you think better what kind of person you are, why you fell in love? In a person, the most important thing is his actions - and not appearance. I'm not handsome either - so what? But I have a wife and daughter whom I love very much and they me. That's why I live! There are no perfect people, and you don't need to listen to those fools who laugh at you. You decide who you are and no one else. Just enjoy life and ignore others. LIFE IS GIVED ONLY ONCE!!!)))

Ryoidenshi, age: 22/28/06/2013

Dear Olya, hello! It seems to me that all people - both women and men, know this feeling when they are dissatisfied with their appearance. And even more so at your age. Therefore, firstly, you are not alone in your experiences, and secondly, it is clear from this that some of these people want to assert themselves by speaking badly about others. Do not pay attention to such words. I'm sorry if I say something wrong - I don't know the whole situation - but in my opinion "beloved person" certainly shouldn't say unpleasant things. On the other hand, you see, you, it turns out, also have a fan) who liked you not only internally (which, by the way, is much more important), but also externally, since, in your opinion, they initially pay attention to appearance. You can correct your appearance without plastic surgery, try to highlight your eyes and lips with makeup, this will divert attention from your nose if you don’t like it so much. You can also choose a hairstyle so that it visually corrects the flaws. But the most important thing is still not in this, you need to love and respect yourself! And it is very important to turn to God. Read the Gospel, go to church, pray for something good. God is waiting for each of us and wants to accept us. Read the parable of the prodigal son, whose return his father rejoiced so much. I wish you all the best. Happiness to you, sincere love - for God, neighbors and adequate love for yourself. Everything will be fine!

Marigold, age: 06/19/2013

Olya, in vain you are so worried about appearance. Even though I used to worry too. And then I realized that happiness does not depend on appearance. I have seen couples many times, the girl is not at all beautiful, her nose is crooked, etc., but it is clear that there is love between them. And there are also very beautiful single girls in the world ... Who can’t get married in any way. Nevertheless, the main thing for guys when choosing a life partner is character, spiritual qualities, and then beauty. So don't worry, you have a boyfriend, you can be happy for you. Apperciate things which you have.

Pooh, age: 25/29.06.2013

Good evening. Girl, I know exactly what complexes are. I couldn’t look at the mirror. In the subway, I thought that everyone was looking at me. This was already unbearable. I turned to God, prayed day and night. With vemin suddenly stopped paying attention. In general, no complexes. And everything started to get better. believe in God do not doubt do not sin and understand what I am saying. don’t pay me a fanatic, but these thoughts come from demons. good luck to you

Anar, age: 32 / 29.06.2013

Olya, firstly, it’s not about appearance - I know many examples of beautiful women whose husbands left for less attractive ones, appearance becomes boring ... I had a friend at school - an incredibly beautiful girl, all the boys were in love with her ... smart girl, from a good family .. yes, fate turned out to be difficult - she fell in love at the age of 15, met for many years ... got married ... her husband drinks, walks, drugs, children with disabilities ... I saw her a couple of years ago, the same features, she hasn’t aged much ... but he pulled the beauty out of her, shook her whole soul out ... but she could have hooked anyone, it was only worth looking at ... fate seems to be like that .. you have a loved one, appreciate it. And your nose - you'll be 18 soon, your parents won't tell you... your nose, whatever you want, do with it :)

Mila, age: 35 / 06/29/2013

Olya, If you want nose surgery, then it's up to you, not your parents. The only thing is, you need to find money for the operation and a good surgeon. They teased many in childhood and you are not the only one who has such problems.

sk , age: 33 / 06/29/2013

Do not be born beautiful, but be born happy. Over time, you will love yourself the way you are, the main thing is that the guy loves you and your loved ones too, because sometimes a girl is beautiful and completely alone, men look only at her appearance, she is a toy for them. beauty is not for long, a beautiful inner you have the world and it’s good, just don’t forget about makeup, beautiful clothes and believe me you will be much prettier. Worry less about it, if God has deprived you of beauty, then he will give you something else. look for the meaning of life in something else, love your loved ones , help people, develop yourself. do not despair)

Anya, age: 17/29.06.2013

Deer dear! Well, don’t worry like that .. If you are physically healthy, then this is the main thing .. That’s when health will go from this hassle, and so it will be, I assure you, I’ve come to this .. Then it will really be a problem .. And now you need calm down and understand, yes, we often do not like ourselves and others .. Firstly, no one gave us such a commandment .. Secondly, the whole world is in Photoshop and plastic. You can’t really tell who looks like) People are losing their individuality .. Around the same woman dolls on the same face. There is no spiritual world inside, such a woman is not suitable for a family. But all sorts of anxious people rush at such people, but not for long. ..But everyone is probably given something of their own for this life .. There is something special in everyone .. And if you already have a loved one, it means that he has found in you something important for himself. Well, what does he say that you are not beauty, he just feels your lack of self-confidence. And you be smarter, take it and stop complexing and pretend that you are generally the best and that you know it .. Yes, it’s not easy, but nothing will work out .. If he tells you something about appearance, confidently put him in his place.. Be independent.. Study and get a good job.. This will give you strength and confidence.. And about the operation and so on.. First get on your feet. in general, everything will change .. I hug and wish peace and joy in my soul) Be happy Olya!

Olya also forgot to write here .. you write that people tell you that you are terrible .. Well, what kind of people are they? What normal person would say that .. I just can’t imagine who you are talking to? Because of your complexes, you allow yourself to communicate with such people and still allow them to humiliate you. You think about why you have such people around and what binds you .. Perhaps it's just your fear of being alone .. Drive such friends, calmly of course without pretension .. Just look from the outside how they treat you and draw conclusions ... Remember, don't let anyone yourself humiliate. If this happens, they are no longer friends ..

Kiriena, age: 36 / 06/29/2013

Hello! There is a joke in which the truth is: "Why are women with small breasts happier than those with large ones? - Yes, because they are definitely not loved for their boobs." I’m quite serious: “Why do you need a lot of fans if you have a loved one?! Don’t you think that this is a betrayal? No serious boy will be with you if you are supportive of attention from others. Beloved appreciates inner beauty in you. You are the best for him. Great! What else do you need, Olenka? To sprinkle the path with roses?! This is window dressing and fanfare. Spending money for show. But having a stash for a rainy day is a concern. There is no need to envy others. Around party girls there are many people, but they are constantly changing. to be happy, you need to love, first of all, an ordinary simple life, work and a few close people. Everyone was teased in childhood and whispered something nasty behind their backs in their youth. And what next? To suffer forever, or what? With age, people get smarter, behave already otherwise, but not all. Is someone's lack of brains your problem? Why should this interfere with your happiness?

Elena Ordinary, age: 37 / 06/29/2013

You are actually much better than you think to yourself. I'm sure of it. You just need to believe in yourself.

Melanie, age: 36 / 06/29/2013

Even beautiful people feel bad and they also have their own complexes. And those people who turn a blind eye to their shortcomings are lucky and enjoy life! If you have a big nose, then do a beautiful hairstyle, make-up, dress beautifully and feel 100%! How you feel is how people will treat you. I also have a lot of complexes, and when I was told this phrase before: “How you feel, people will treat you like that,” I didn’t understand how this was possible, but then I tried it and was surprised at the result! I just woke up, went to the shower, did makeup, hair,... (not necessarily causing makeup, dressing and doing super hairstyles - you just need to tint your eyes a little, lips - with a gloss, for example, do the so-called home hair styling, dress beautifully and to you were comfortable and that's it - YOU ARE A PRINCESS!) After that, I did not look at myself much in the mirror so as not to notice the flaws - acne, pimples, small lips, .. And I went for a walk. On this day, 2 guys complimented me and 1 came up to meet me! You just need to believe, believe that you are beautiful, that you are feminine, that you have a beautiful smile, that your nose is a normal size ... and then others will believe in it! Love yourself, love to live, be kind, considerate, ... And even more so, you have a boyfriend, which means that you have a person to whom you can open up, who will support and protect you at the right moment. Therefore, you are not so unhappy! Look at life positively! And you don't have to do any surgery! Of course, this is a personal matter for everyone, and I don’t want and I won’t tell you, but still it’s better not to. Your boyfriend, your friends love and accept you for who you are. And don't be ashamed of it! Maybe your nose isn't that big. Perhaps this is your so-called highlight. Believe that only those people who believe in themselves and love themselves, no matter what, enjoy life. Let them have a big nose, small eyes, irregularly shaped lips, .. BUT they love themselves! And you LOVE YOURSELF DESPITE ANYTHING!!!

Dorothy, age: 15/29.06.2013

"Beautiful-looking people are more loved" ... Olya, are you sure about that? Beautiful people are envied, and often with black envy. Models and actresses intrigue each other, one model even had sulfuric acid poured into her face, just out of envy, so that she would stop participating in a beauty contest. So there are different situations. External beauty is not only a gift, but also a test for a person. I once read a girl's letter "I don't want to be beautiful" on one of the sites. She said that all the problems in life are because of her beauty. The girls envy her, they are not friends with her, she cannot hold out for a long time at work, because. the less beautiful female team rots her, the men all pester, or consider her a whore, the boss offers a bed. It happens. So, it is better not to be beautiful, but to be average in appearance. I have noticed more than once that beautiful girls are often arrogant, arrogant, capricious, angry. And not particularly beautiful girls are sweet, kind, the light of kindness comes from their faces, and this is much more attractive than just beautiful facial features. And you, I'm sure, have your own charm and charm. My boyfriend also told me that my face is not beautiful, but cute. It offended me at first, but he loves me for my soul, and threw girls more beautiful than me, just to be with me. By the way, you are still very young, and teenagers and youths first of all see appearance. But over the years, this passes, and in a person his inner qualities begin to be appreciated. Think Olya! And higher nose!

TanyaT, age: 28 / 30.06.2013

Oh, what's the real problem? Young healthy - everything is ahead. There is an MCH who loves. Why sit and wind yourself up? Do you think beauty matters? The main thing is health, inner peace and a harmoniously developed personality. I am beautiful, but because of the illness, there were no friends left, and soon beauty too .. And all my life I had problems with my friends, because people are envious. And the guys .... somehow they were unlucky .... the wrong ones came across. In addition to appearance, there is also a soul.

Nyuta, age: 07/29/2013

Olya, unfortunately, every person has problems in life that have to be overcome: someone has poor health, someone could not get a normal education, someone else got relatives with a completely unbearable character ... I'm sure that you are a sweet, pretty girl, but at the age of 17 very few people like their appearance. Try to go to a stylist, sign up for a fitness club, sew yourself a completely stunning dress .. The more such small “steps” to improvement, the less unpleasant thoughts about your appearance will appear. I have a girlfriend - a girl in the literal sense dazzling appearance. Some even called her the Venus de Milo ... But alas - at 33, she is not married, has no children, and in general - no male close person ... And the other friend is clearly overweight, small, with a large nose - dearly loved by her husband, their marriage for more than 15 years, there is a daughter. So - a bright appearance is far from a guarantee of a successful and happy life, no matter how the hosts of all fashionable sentences try to convince us of this and "take it off immediately"

Anna, age: 33 / 07/02/2013

Olya, hello! there is no justice in the world - it's a fact. It is also good to realize that there is no beginning that controls destinies, leads people somewhere - no. Do cats think about what their fate is? What about elephants and rhinos? It's comical, but I mean that a person, in fact, is the same biological species, but with a developed intellect and psyche, and therefore bothers about justice and his fate.

Your appearance, your face was largely determined by a combination of parental genes. No luck - yes, most likely, that's right. Tritely unlucky, happens to everyone. Someone is born healthy, beautiful and in a rich family, and someone is sick, ugly and in poverty. For the first, all the delights of life are immediately available, and for the second, if he plows a lot, stubbornly and purposefully to solve his problems, he will only have a chance to possess all these charms.

At the same time, I think that the majority already really understands that it is not worth underestimating the importance of appearance for building relationships and a healthy psyche. The face - the most individual part of a person - is of great importance in all this.

So, life dealt us cards. Someone - trump cards, someone - a younger variety. The point is to replace weak cards with strong ones. You can whine about how ugly I am, but you can do everything to improve the situation, but you will have to change your attitude to what cannot be changed. =) And, finally, something can be compensated for by other strengths. I'll start from the first. 1. Hairstyle. 2. Makeup. 3. Skin care. 4. Dental services. 5. Vision correction. 6. Plastic surgery of the face. These are just some of the ways to improve the appearance of your face. If your soul does not harmonize with your face, work on the latter as much as possible. Yes, it takes money and time. Yes, the effect of something is not guaranteed. But who said it would be easy? If you want to live fully - forward to changes for the better. The phrase "be yourself" refers primarily to your inclinations, predispositions, character (although the latter also needs to be worked on). But not for looks. Therefore, in my opinion, if the face is not very satisfying, and there are no contraindications against plastic surgery, then why not do it? Suddenly, just this little thing (on the scale of life) is the key to the beginning of your happiness?

Unfortunately, with the current level of technology, not everything can be changed. Therefore, something will have to change its attitude. Accept yourself just like that. You will also have to work on this psychologically, but there is no other way. The state of inner harmony that you achieve will make you much more beautiful in the eyes of others than if you take a steam bath and complex about some features of your appearance.

And finally, compensation is another powerful weapon on the road to success. Your appearance is not only your face, it is also your body, clothes, accessories, etc. And here, as you know, there is much more room for improvement. =) Don't be lazy, take care of your figure, update your wardrobe (albeit not right away). A great figure and carefully selected clothes will greatly improve your appearance. The ideal female body is, believe me, an incredible temptation for any man. But it just takes a lot of work! Fitness, skin care, tanning - it can be difficult to manage all this with our rhythm of life, but you can definitely allocate half an hour every day.

And this applies not only to the figure and clothes. You can become an interesting interlocutor, and learn a competent dialogue, such that men will be crazy about communicating with you...

1) change in the appearance of the face; 2) work on achieving inner harmony; 3) the development of other aspects of your physical, intellectual and spiritual components -

these are, albeit difficult, but ways to achieve happiness. Develop a plan, work on each of the areas, evaluate the results, make adjustments, MANAGE YOUR LIFE.

Think about it well. I hope this will help you get on the path of development and achieve significant results.

P.S. And remember that fullness in life is in emotions. And vivid emotions can be obtained not only from communication with the opposite sex. ;)

Emperor , age: 02/23/2014

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