Why do girls close. How to know if your girlfriend likes someone else. Excessive obsession of a young man

What is the companion of love? What is the beginning of a love relationship? What can no couple in love do without? Of course, no kissing!

At the first kiss, the question creeps in, is everything going right? Teenage girls try to find information in magazines and books on how to kiss properly. Boys look at this question easier. They rely on nature and intuition. However, it is worth knowing: a kiss is a kiss of strife. A passionate kiss in a long-term relationship differs from the first timid and timid one. To make it clear how to kiss, it is necessary to consider the features of kisses.

Young boys and girls are afraid of the first kiss, although they are waiting impatiently. With such a kiss, there are only movements of the lips, the time has not yet come for tongue games. The lips of the partner (partner) should gently touch the lips of the beloved or beloved, the movements should be soft, gentle, light, as if retracting. The ability to kiss well implies the ability to properly hug and use hands. Sometimes men already at the first kiss try to give free rein to their hands, this is unacceptable. The first kiss is for that and the first to be virginal and tender. Stroking the partner's face is allowed, although you should not get carried away, however, it is also impossible to stand with your hands down. The guy can lightly hug his partner around the waist, and in response, she can put her arm around her beloved by the shoulders. The first kiss should not last long, the main thing is that it be gentle.

Many girls often say that they absolutely do not know how and do not know how to kiss a guy. But it is difficult to agree with this, because everyone can kiss, only not everyone tried to do it. A kiss is not some unusual gift, but a natural ability of a person. It is only necessary to develop this skill.

Still, before kissing for the first time, it is better to practice. The kissing technique should be at least slightly rehearsed with the movements of the lips in the air. However, it is unlikely to succeed in guessing what a kiss with a guy will actually be. Therefore, it is better to completely forget at the time when you kiss for the first time for real about all the learned movements, how to do it correctly, and rely only on your feelings and sensations. Your emotions will allow you to choose the right path.
It is necessary during the kiss to touch the guy as much as possible, try to touch many parts of the body. But remember that the first kiss simply has to be romantic, and not at all right, and in a hurry, so you shouldn't. Also, do not strive to set records for the duration of the kiss. Let this kiss be the most tender.
Kissing is an incredibly enjoyable process, but not everyone can learn to enjoy it the first time. This is due to the fact that too much attention is paid to their actions, assessment of the situation. But as soon as you get rid of all these thoughts, you immediately begin to understand how pleasant it is to kiss. Therefore, it is better to immediately drive away unnecessary thoughts from yourself, relax and completely surrender to the process.
While we are kissing, substances that elevate mood, give energy and cheerfulness enter our brain with blood. However, the psychology of a kiss suggests that all this will be pleasant only if you kiss with your loved one. Only then will it be pleasant and easy for you, and his lips will seem the most delicious.
Don't be upset if you don't know how to kiss. For training, gently move your tongue over your own lips, fold it into a tube, turn the lollipops over in your mouth, breathe through your nose - and everything will work out. On the advice of psychologists, you need to imagine everything in detail in your imagination in advance. This will make you feel confident.

You can watch the video on how to kiss properly, movie stars are certainly good at it.

Still, kissing is better without:

Onions, tobacco and alcohol;
Witnesses - friends, parents, passers-by;
Bruises, hickeys and scratches;
Tickling, runny nose and herpes.
1. You need to start a kiss with your mouth closed, and when you feel the answer, kiss again. After that, you can decide on a long kiss, while acting slowly. After all, sometimes the guys do not correctly interpret the intentions of the girl and begin to act independently and too boldly. You need to decide for yourself how far you are willing to go this time. Sometimes a short kiss with closed lips is already a great start.
2. After that, you can proceed to the next stage - kiss, slightly opening your mouth, paying attention to whether he did the same. There is no need to use the tongue right away, since this is an element of the next stage of the kiss.
3. After you kiss with your mouth open, you can continue to kiss with your tongue. You need to touch the guy's lips with his tip, which will become a kind of signal. If he reciprocates, then he is also ready for such a kiss. Gently and slowly move the tip of your tongue over the guy's lips. It is important that the tongues contact softly and gently. Increase them little by little.

A few rules on how to properly kiss a guy for the first time.

Before you start kissing, light biting is allowed, as a kind of preliminary stage before the kiss. You can go for some trick and offer the guy something tasty before the kiss. But here caution is required.

At the first kiss, you can limit yourself to just touching your lips, that is, without a tongue (a kiss in French). According to polls, it turns out that men like such kisses just like tongue kisses.

Of course, the first kiss requires careful preparation. Pay attention to the freshness of your breath. When brushing your teeth, don't forget your tongue. Refuse before a date from products that have strong odors. Before the kiss, be sure to let the guy know that he is pleasant to you, smile, laugh, hold his hands, put your head on his shoulder.

The most important thing is not to rush into this matter. The best thing you can do is give the guy a signal that is understandable without any words. Let him know what you want and expect. Take his hand and gently pull him towards you. If the guy responds to your signals, then he is ready for what is happening. If he retreats and turns away, then the time for this has not yet come.

The sequence of actions at the first kiss.

During the kiss, you need to pay attention to what effect the hands have. The longer the kiss lasts, the more active the movements of your hands: touch the partner’s shoulders, stroke his back, head. Gentle touches to the face are perfect. The main thing is not to be afraid, kissing a guy for the first time is not at all scary, but very pleasant!

All these rules are quite appropriate for guys.

Today, young people often face such a problem: a guy gets acquainted with a young lady, they exchange phone numbers, after which the representative of the stronger sex expects a call from the girl, and in response - silence. He can only guess why the girls do not write first.

Of course, in our society it has long been established that a man is the head of a relationship, since he is the breadwinner and breadwinner in the family. From this point of view, it is quite understandable why girls do not write first. If the stronger sex is the leader in relationships, then he should also be the initiator.

However, there are disagreements among experts on this issue. Some believe that it is the man who should approach the lady and strike up a conversation with her, because by nature he is stronger than the woman. Others, on the contrary, wonder why girls do not write to their boyfriends first. They are sure that it is the ladies who should take the first step, because because of their inexperience, the young man is afraid of not being liked by the fairer sex, and refusing further communication will be a real disaster for him. As a result, his male ego will suffer greatly. For a young man who is deprived of female attention, the question of why girls do not write first is the key, since he can search for the answer to it indefinitely. Meanwhile... A woman in the classical sense of the word is a tender and defenseless creature, so her destiny is to wait for her conqueror. And it doesn't matter if anyone likes it or not. It just so happened...

Reasons why a woman does not take the initiative herself

There are many reasons that explain why a representative of the weaker sex does not call or write to her new acquaintance.

Of course, a huge number of young people will be interested to know what motivates a girl to adhere to such tactics of behavior. Let's consider this aspect in more detail.

Once

The girl leads an active lifestyle: she studies, works, she goes to classes in a fitness club. She often does not have enough time for communication. Naturally, if she does not make herself felt, this is not a reason to think that her interest in the guy has been lost. In this case, you need to think together about how to find time for meetings so that everyone is comfortable.

stereotypes

Often the answer to the question of why the young lady does not write to the first young man lies on the surface. In Russian society, the foundations of upbringing are such that the idea is imposed on girls from childhood that it is boys who should dominate relationships, as mentioned above. They should be the first to say hello, come up to get acquainted, invite to a dance or propose a hand and heart ... For they are men!

Of course, for supporters of conservative education, the answer to the question "whether to write to the girl first" is obvious. Of course. Naturally, almost all parents of girls and girls are worried that their "blood" is not accused of free morals. No one is surprised that it is the young man who first meets the young lady, the first to appoint her a romantic meeting, the first to kiss her and make passionate declarations of love.

And how to interpret the situation if the girl is the first to write to the guy?

Drawing attention to yourself

It often happens that a representative of the weaker sex does not write to a guy just because she wants to attract maximum attention from him. With this behavior, she intends to take over his heart completely, according to her scenario, the young man should think about her all 24 hours a day. And in order to achieve this, he must be a little nervous about the fact that his calls are not answered. Admittedly, this way of seduction is a bit rude. It makes sense when a new acquaintance does not make itself felt for a long time, and then suddenly suddenly starts calling.

Of course, every woman wants to be in the center of male attention, and for this she is ready to go to great lengths.

Excessive obsession of a young man

Some young people sometimes show excessive perseverance towards the object of their passion, constantly calling the girl and constantly wondering what she is doing and where she is. Of course, such behavior of a young man cannot but frighten a young lady, so she is unlikely to make an attempt to write to him first. Such a guy can only be advised to change his tactics of behavior and not be overly annoying.

The girl takes the initiative

And how to interpret the situation if the girl is the first to write to the guy? Often, this scares guys, because everyone believes that first a man should show interest in a lady and write her, for example, an SMS message. It is the stronger sex that should seek female love. Of course, the lady has the right to slightly draw the attention of the man to the fact that she is glad to continue communicating with him. But only. She herself should take the first step in a relationship in very rare cases. Thus, the answer to the question of whether a girl should write first is obvious.

In any case, a young man should be able to overcome his fear of a girl, be the first to approach a young lady or write to her. After all, he is a man!

As already emphasized, the girl likes it when the guy thinks about her, so with her silence she tries to draw his attention to her person.

What to do if the girl does not make itself felt?

Many guys are at a loss as to why their young ladies are in no hurry to send SMS or call them. Of course, they want to somehow influence the situation. In the meantime, you don't have to do anything. Nobody has the right to force her to write to you. Yes, that doesn't make any sense. It is better to take the first step yourself and after a short communication it is possible that then she will be the first to remind you of herself. Perhaps, with such behavior, the beauty simply hints that you need to not just lie down on the bed and, sipping beer, talk on the phone. Is she interested in you? So, please, tear off your ass from a soft and comfortable chair or sofa and go to a personal meeting, of course, having agreed on everything in advance. However, this may not happen, and it is not necessary to blame her for this. In any case, the young man must control the situation.

Communication in social networks

Modern youth today prefers to get acquainted on the World Wide Web and hang out all day long on social networks. Of course, for many it is very convenient.

Many guys are interested in the question of why the girl writes the first "VKontakte". Yes, and it happens. To achieve such success, you need to adhere to certain communication rules, for example, write an original comment on her photo.

In general, if a guy wants not to be left without the attention of the opposite sex, he should not forget the wonderful words of the classic: “The less we love a girl, the more she likes us.” The main thing is not to overdo it. Good luck with the beautiful ladies!

Even a relationship full of love and trust is sometimes overshadowed by a shadow of doubt. If you are worried that your girlfriend is hiding her feelings for another from you, Very it is important to make sure that your suspicions are justified before doing anything. Pay attention to what she does, what she says, and how she behaves, and this will help you figure out her true feelings. But remember, no matter how confident you are, confidence Not replace the actual evidence.

Steps

When to start the "investigation"?

Learn to trust your girlfriend before prying into her past and personal life. Relationships are based on trust. This does not mean never being jealous or suspicious; it means being able to put those feelings aside and trust the girl. If you don't trust her, maybe you shouldn't be together. Suspicion and jealousy repel people, especially if you start digging into their lives for no reason.

Accept the fact that you can't read her mind. If she told someone that she likes another guy, or if she herself took a step towards a breakup, that's one thing. But constantly speculating about who she might feel interested or attracted to is a pointless exercise. Think for yourself: how often do you have fleeting feelings for other girls? And how often do you really go on about these feelings?

Small hobbies are completely normal, even if your relationship is stable as a rock. If you try to expose every such attraction, you won't be with this girl for long.
If you look at yourself from the outside, you will understand that it may seem like you like other girls, while you are just being friendly with them. Jealousy makes us make up stories from scratch.

Let her deal with her feelings and you deal with yours. If she liked the other, she herself will decide what to do next. Either she will break up with you, or she will realize that a new hobby does not mean so much to her. Either way, it's her actions that matter, not her thoughts. Ironically, your self-confidence that she is your girlfriend, period, makes you that much more attractive. Owners and whiners are left alone.
- She is already with you. She is your girl! If , it doesn't matter if she temporarily likes someone else: she loves you.
Undertake further investigation if you have reason to be suspicious but want to keep the relationship. Both conditions are required. If you don’t have grounds for suspicion (she hides someone’s SMS from you, keeps aloof, gets caught in a lie, and so on), digging into her life is rude and ugly. If you don't want to keep the relationship or don't trust her at all, just break up. What does it matter if she likes the other guy or not? Your problems are much deeper.
- Seriously ask yourself why it matters to you if she likes another. If you are afraid of losing her, talk to her. If the very thought pisses you off, you should back off.
- If you are unable to trust your girlfriend - either you have had some incidents in the past, or you cannot get rid of the idea that she is interested in other guys - just break up.
Rate her actions
1. See if she avoids physical intimacy. One of the main and most obvious signs that something is wrong in a relationship is if physical intimacy starts to make one partner uncomfortable. Whether you're holding hands, hugging, kissing, or having sex, physical intimacy requires a lot of trust from both of you. If one of the partners knows that he has broken this trust, physical intimacy can become awkward and unnatural for him, even if before everything was easy and wonderful. If your girlfriend suddenly recoils from your touch, something is definitely up, although it's not necessarily cheating.
  - To clarify: we are talking about a sudden, inexplicable reluctance to have physical intimacy, which you had before. If you had sex before and now you don't, it looks like a problem. However, if you only kissed a girl on the cheek, then her unwillingness to have sex does not mean that she likes someone else. People sometimes need time to move from one stage of physical intimacy to another. Too fast transition to sex is one of the most common complaints of women in connection with the physical aspect of relationships.
2. Check if she is hiding her phone from you. In today's world, phones and personal electronic devices have become a way to keep in touch with the people who matter to us. However, if your girlfriend has been playing tricks on someone, it is likely that the phone has all the information about German. Pay attention to how your girlfriend uses her phone. Does she keep him close to her when she texts? Has she recently set a password? She won't let you use it? She doesn't want to lose sight of the phone? If yes, she is hiding something.
  - This advice doesn't just apply to phones, but also to other electronic gadgets people use to communicate with each other. For example, if your girlfriend closes her laptop or logs out of a social media page every time you enter a room, this can be cause for concern if it occurs in combination with the other signals described in the article.
3. See if her schedule has gotten busier. Active and busy guys and girls sometimes just have moments when they cannot devote time to each other. This is quite natural, many couples experience this. However, if your girlfriend suddenly becomes too busy to see you for a long time, and her explanation does not seem convincing, it probably means that she is spending her free time with someone else. If your girlfriend can't make time for you and her explanations are inconsistent, you definitely have cause for concern.
  - To figure out where your charts really didn't match up, and where she's cheating on you, try the following trick. When your girlfriend says she can't meet you, try suggesting a different time. If she still can't, wait for her to suggest an alternative. Usually, when people want to spend time with each other, but their schedules don't match, they suggest another time to meet. If your girlfriend is content when things don't work out, it probably means she doesn't really want to spend time with you at all.
4. See if she avoids eye contact. The willingness to look someone in the eye is considered a sign of sincerity and honesty. When people hide something from someone close, it is difficult or even almost painful for them to look that person in the eye. If your girlfriend is suddenly avoiding your gaze, something may not be right.
  
  Watch for changes in her habits. When a guy dates a girl for a while, her routine and daily habits become very familiar to him simply by spending time together. If a girl suddenly began to spend time differently, this cannot but be considered strange. But if this happens in unison with the other changes described in the article, this is a serious cause for concern. Things get even more suspicious if she doesn't want to do her new business with you. Typically, people attend activities they don't really like early in a relationship; this is done with only one goal - to please the partner.
  - Let's say your girlfriend used to hate going to the beach with her boyfriend, but has spent the last two weeks with "some friends" at one of their beach houses. As her boyfriend, you would be wise to ask this, especially if she pretends to always love the beaches.
5. See if she has changed her clothes. For both sexes, a sudden, drastic change in the way you dress may mean that another aspect of a person's life has changed as well. For example, it could be a sign that the person has become lonely, has lost someone and is grieving, or has gotten a new job. However, within a relationship, if someone drastically changes their "look" without warning or explanation, or they are not convincing, it may mean that she is trying to impress a third party.
  - This is a particularly disturbing signal if your girlfriend has begun to look defiant or provocative. For example, it is less likely that a person who is known for his conservative style of clothing will spontaneously start going bare-bellied and in short tops than someone without such a reputation.
6. Find out if she is ignoring you. The very thought of a "cold welcome" will make any worried guy shudder. If you suspect your girlfriend, pay attention to how she treats you, does she seem indifferent or uninterested in what you say? Maybe she belittles your opinion or ignores it altogether? Does your presence affect her behavior in any way? Is she completely unreachable on the phone or on social media? If you start to feel invisible around your girlfriend, you have relationship problems.
  - If you feel like you're being ignored, stay calm. You shouldn't text a girl - it doesn't matter if she spends time with another guy or not. Remember - constant attempts to grab someone's attention may indicate your exceptional desperation.
7. Don't tolerate obvious signs of infidelity. Based on the above, it will be difficult to understand whether your girlfriend likes someone else just by watching her. However, if your girlfriend is brazen enough to be open about her preference for another, you don't need to look for other signs. In such cases, your relationship needs a serious reassessment. Below are a few obvious actions that you definitely do not need to endure.
  - If she shows open affection for someone else that goes beyond friendly pseudo-flirting or harmless banter (for example, kissing, intimate dancing, etc.).
  - If you are dumped in public to spend time with someone else.
  - If she shows disrespect or makes fun of you beyond good-natured teasing, especially around certain people.
  - If she openly tries to seduce or excite another person with hints or appeals that do not look sarcastic or ironic.
Hear what she says
1. Pay attention to how often you speak. Even the closest couples forget how important good communication is from time to time. However, a prolonged lack of communication may indicate that the relationship is "on the verge of a split." If you get negative messages from your girlfriend, start counting how often you talk to each other (this includes non-personal communication: phone calls, messages, and so on). If you notice a sharp drop or the account grows slowly, you probably have cause for concern.
  
  Listen for lies and reservations. In the words of Mark Twain: “If you tell the truth, then you don’t have to remember anything.” Even the most experienced deceivers sometimes get their stories mixed up, so if you suspect your girlfriend, look for logical holes or contradictions in her words. People who lie about where they were, what they did, who they were with, most often make mistakes in their stories. You just need to listen and be ready to catch them.
  
  Notice how vaguely she talks about her personal life. Some people who have something to hide, instead of lying, avoid talking about how they spend all their time. If your girlfriend used to happily talk about her life, friends, hobbies, but now she does it reluctantly, perhaps this is how she minimizes her guilt for lying. Try to identify such vagueness or evasiveness when you ask her about her pastime. If she does not say anything other than these phrases, she may be trying to hide something:
  - "Nothing".
  - "Why do you need it?"
  - "I've just been very busy."
  - "I do not want to talk about it".
2. Notice how willingly she reveals details about her new friends. Usually new friends are good. However, if your girlfriend doesn't feel comfortable talking about specific new friends, there's probably something fishy here (especially if she's always been happy to talk about her friends before). Even if it doesn't mean that she likes someone else, it may indicate that she is ashamed of the people she spent time with or the things she did with them, so she is afraid of your reaction to it. Openness and trust are very important in any relationship. If your girlfriend doesn't want to talk about the people she's been spending time with, that's a sign some problems, even if it's not cheating.
3. Notice the reluctance to acknowledge your relationship. When a partner knows he cheated, even just mentioning the relationship in a casual conversation can be painful for him. Talking about a relationship that suggests cheating can make a girl feel guilty or irritated, reminding her that the current relationship is still going on. Ask the girl some of the questions below to see if she is comfortable talking about the relationship. If she appears unusually secretive, irritated, embarrassed, or unwilling to respond, this could be a sign of a problem:
  - “How good do you think we are as a couple?”
  - "How would you like to have fun in the next few months?"
  - “What do you think we can do to improve our relationship?”
  - "What is your favorite memory of us?"
  - "How do you see us in a year?"
Read her emotions
1. Feel if there is an emotional distance. Often, when something is not right in a relationship, one or both partners may simply "feel" that they are emotionally withdrawing. Where people used to be close and connected to each other, now they feel like they hardly know each other. If earlier it was easy to share emotions, hug, talk about anything, now interactions seem forced and “cold”. If your girlfriend seems cold and aloof, squeeze the problem out of her. It is better to talk to her immediately to understand the root of the problem than to languish in misfortune.
  - However, note that prolonged emotional distance can be a sign of many relationship problems. besides infidelity.
2. Notice extreme defensiveness. Sometimes people who know that something is going wrong become very sensitive to any criticism or accusations. Because their misdeeds are fresh in their minds, any innocent teasing or nagging is taken as a personal attack. If your girlfriend recently surprised you with unnecessarily hostile answers to innocuous questions, you probably have a serious problem. Below are a few of these harmless and provocative questions. If she responds to them with anger or frustration, it's worth considering.
  - "Who were you talking to on the phone?"
  - "So what did you do last weekend?"
  - "What are your plans for next Friday?"
  - "How are your friends?"
  - "Who did you see recently?"
3. Watch out for unexpected aggression. In one of the worst cases for a relationship, one partner may fall so in love with someone else that they will try to actively destroy the relationship they are currently in. This can manifest itself in the form of aggression, rudeness, disappointment, resentment, and more. In this case, your girlfriend will most likely try to break up with you in order to pursue a new relationship without feeling guilty.
  - If your relationship gets to this point, unfortunately, the best thing to do is to give your girlfriend what she wants. The pain after a quick separation is usually not as severe as that felt by continuing an unhappy relationship with someone who actively wants to run away from it.
4. Observe how uncomfortable she is to receive your kindness. Usually random acts of kindness can bring an unexpected “spark” to a relationship. However, if your partner is seriously thinking about someone else, this kind of kindness will make her feel guilty. Almost no one likes to receive appreciation from someone who has been wronged, so if your girlfriend doesn't seem happy receiving a gift or other acts of kindness from you, be prepared for other red flags. Below are a few things that are usually taken as normal, but not when a girl is seriously thinking about someone else:
  - gifts for any occasion (especially "just because");
  - unusual nightly entertainment;
  - fine dining;
  - unexpected appearances at work;
  - changing your schedule "just for her".