Why do men like older women. Why do men choose older women

Relationships where a woman is older than a man are becoming more and more common in our society, and are hardly surprising. And this is not surprising: if both a man and a woman are satisfied with such relationships, is it worth judging them? Young men like more experienced women, who are often more understanding and less demanding than young girls. And although, according to statistics, relationships when a woman is older than a man are much more rare than those when the same age is married or a couple where the girl is younger than her partner, they also have a right to exist.

What are the advantages of a relationship in which the woman is older than the man?

- First of all, a woman, meeting with a chosen one younger than herself, is forced to keep herself in good shape. This is a great incentive to maintain the grace of your body, regularly update your wardrobe, spend time on your appearance, remember what kind of figure men like.

- There are advantages in such relationships for the men themselves, because, being next to a more experienced woman, the young man will strive to match her, turning from a young guy into a real man with stable views, goals and aspirations.

- In addition, it is much more interesting to communicate with an older woman, she is already a more balanced and formed personality, which cannot be said about his peers. A woman for a man who is younger than her becomes both a mother and a wife. She can give smart advice, find the right words of support, which a young girl cannot do, even if she tries very hard. Young people are ruled by emotions, and over the years, prudence appears in their character.

Such relationships are also attractive because a woman’s experience in sexual terms will easily allow her to teach a man to give her pleasure, she will teach him good sex and, to be honest, she will give advice in everyday life, while adjusting an older partner is not so easy .

As we can see, relationships when a woman is older than a man have quite significant advantages, so a loving couple of this type can last quite a long time, practically without any worries. However, behind the positive appearance, there are also some cons that can easily destroy a fragile alliance.

- First of all, in such a relationship, a woman will feel constant insecurity and anxiety due to the fact that her young man will be taken away by a young girl. Such anxiety can lead to bouts of constant jealousy, which, of course, will affect the relationship in a far from good way. A woman will begin to be jealous of a man for every skirt she meets.

- In addition, a kind of sissy often grows out of a young man, who perceives a woman solely as a nanny who fulfills his desires and takes care of him.

- Alphonse men aged 20-30 are a dime a dozen. Many of them thus want to earn a good living. But it is very easy to recognize them. Do not hesitate and ignore the meaningless excuses about temporary financial troubles. Often women understand why a young guy spends his time on an aged beauty, but turn a blind eye to this for the sake of sex with a young man. True, not everything is always so bad. There are actually couples in love who don’t care about the difference in age - they feel good together, and the rest does not interest them.

- Finally, there are also cases when the age difference turns into a significant difference in values ​​and aspirations, because most often a woman older than a man knows for sure what she wants from life, while a guy most often does not have time to decide.

As you can see, if a woman is older than a man, the relationship expects not only disagreements, but also a happy future. However, you should not pay much attention to age if you are firmly convinced that you love each other. The main thing is that you want to be together, and whether a woman is older than a man or not is the tenth thing.

source women.uol.ua

And a little more humor on this topic)))) And in every joke there is some truth))

* An older woman will never wake you up in the middle of the night with a stupid question "What were you thinking, honey?" Because she just doesn't care what you think.

* An older woman always keeps a condom in her purse. Young people still hope that you will take care of this.

* An older woman will cost you less. A younger one will cost you 12 Martini glasses at the bar, while an older woman will sleep with you after a cup of herbal tea at home.

* An older woman can wear bright red lipstick during the day and not look like she just climbed into a jar of jam. This does not apply to a young girl.

* Older women run faster because they always wear comfortable shoes.

* An older woman is more honest. She will call you an "idiot" if you only treat her like that. A young woman will never call you that for fear of losing you.

* An older woman will never unexpectedly become pregnant and suddenly decide that one of the two of you should get married urgently. If an older woman gets pregnant, you will usually be the last one to know...

* An older woman always has a job in which she is already entitled to health insurance, which includes the services of a dentist. A young girl will not help you when your teeth are damaged from playing hockey.

* An older woman will never suspect you of being "using her". She is just using you.

* An older woman will simply call you and ask when it's convenient for you to meet her if you want. The young one will wait forever by the phone when you call her.

* An older woman knows how to cook. The young woman knows the phone number for ordering pizza at the place around the corner.

* An older woman will introduce you to all her friends. The young one will hide you from them so that you don’t have thoughts about ...

* An older woman always has an excellent collection of luxurious underwear left over from her former lovers. Young people rarely wear underwear, which practically excludes the possibility of striptease.

* An older woman is perspicacious and quick-witted. You never have to confess to her about the scam on the side, because the hell knows how, but she always knows about it herself.

* Older women have self-esteem, so they will never throw a tantrum in a public place.

* Older women are experienced and know that in bed you can not always get everything right after the 12th mug of beer. It may take a young person a long time to realize this fact.

* An older woman has many girlfriends, most of whom will also want to sleep with you.

* An older woman will never accuse you of "stealing her best years" because someone else has already stolen them before you

Often, ladies over 30 years old and Balzac age prefer to see a young man next to them, and not their peers. Guys tend to get close to an older woman. Now such unions have become quite popular, although 10-15 years ago such "non-traditional" couples were condemned by society. The verdict was adamant: there was nothing good from such a union and never will be. But is it?

IT IS IMPORTANT TO KNOW! Appeared Delicious marmalade for weight loss... Read more >>

Reasons for choosing

Psychologists identify several main reasons why women love young boys:

Cause Explanation
Attractive appearance of a young manHaving become an "adult", the stronger sex begins to be lazy and ceases to carefully monitor itself: excess weight appears, swelling of the face, and the once slender male figure blurs and disappears under a layer of fat folds. Therefore, a beautiful young body is so attractive to middle-aged ladies. Young guys appreciate grooming, style and the ability to present themselves in a woman older than themselves: something that young girls lack due to inexperience
Higher chance of getting marriedIt will be much easier to legitimize your relationship with a young man than to lead a peer taught by bitter experience down the aisle. Young people do not know all the vicissitudes of marriage and cohabitation, so it will not be difficult for a woman with experience to persuade them to create a full-fledged family
Getting bright emotionsOver time, men for the most part stop devoting time to romantic relationships, "growing up" and forgetting that a woman is waiting for attention from them. Unlike mature men, young people are capable of "madness" and sincere manifestations of feelings for the sake of their beloved.

Why do guys choose women older than themselves:

Cause Explanation
Attention and care from a womanThanks to the maternal instinct that any woman has, regardless of the presence of children, the young man will be surrounded by the attention he needs. A woman will take care of his health, nutrition, be sincerely interested in business and rejoice in his success. In addition, a smart mature lady will always help her beloved with good practical advice.
Harmonious sexOften, girls behave constrainedly in bed with a partner, not allowing themselves or him to show imagination and enjoy sex. The inexperience of peers in matters of sexual relations leads to the fact that the guy pays attention to the older girl. She will not make fun of a man in bed, she will understand his desires and give him true passion
Mutual understanding with a partnerAn older woman, making her choice, is ready to put up with the shortcomings of a young man, which is not typical for young girls who seek to "remake" their boyfriend.

An older woman knows exactly what she wants from her partner and what she is ready to give to him. The maturity of the female personality, her self-confidence appeal to young people, so they choose experience and beauty, rather than the freshness of youth.

Psychology of a man at 40

relationship mistakes

The "unconventional" union of two hearts is often destroyed due to mistakes that both partners can make. Some of the most common reasons for a gap in psychology are the following:

  1. 1. Excessive jealousy. If you strive to completely capture the attention and time of your partner, this will lead to misunderstanding, coldness and termination of the relationship. A man and a woman should have time for friends, parents, children. Trying to take their place in your partner's life would be the wrong thing to do.
  2. 2. Eagerness to teach. An older woman sees the mistakes of youth well, but if she teaches a young man at every step, he will quickly get tired of it. One of the joys of youth is the feeling of free choice, and you shouldn't take it away from a guy.
  3. 3. Everyday problems. There is no need to violate a person’s personal space, and if a woman does not strive to spend every free evening with a young chosen one, you should not be offended and reproach her for dislike and heartlessness. The same applies to financial matters. A guy who asks or often borrows money from his other half will quickly turn into a hindrance for a woman and get tired of her.

Softness and tact are the main weapons that want the best for her lover.

After a certain period, the union of two people of different ages can become strong and happy, or one day it will break up due to the loss of interest of both partners in relationships.

And some secrets...

The story of one of our readers Irina Volodina:

I was especially depressed by the eyes, surrounded by large wrinkles, plus dark circles and swelling. How to remove wrinkles and bags under the eyes completely? How to deal with swelling and redness?But nothing ages or rejuvenates a person like his eyes.

Why do young guys like older women? How often do we learn from acquaintances that former classmate Mikhail met a woman much older than himself and is going to live happily ever after with her?

Such stories are now found at every turn. In our time, the relationship of a young guy and an adult woman who has taken place has become the norm of social behavior and, in principle, does not cause public outcry.

But still, let's figure out why this social phenomenon takes place, and a professional psychologist-consultant will help us with this Ivan Kotva , which will answer the main question: “Why do young men gravitate towards women older than themselves?”.

Phenomenon

As psychology tells us, the tendency to build relationships with older women is characteristic of a certain percentage of men from 25 to 35 years old.

This is by no means an obligatory stage in the formation of a man as a person, this phenomenon simply takes place. It is worth noting that as a variant of the norm, situations are considered where young men under 20 have experience of communicating with older women due to the fact that they have no social experience at all. But in general, the deliberate search for a woman older than himself is, of course, considered a deviation from the social norm of behavior.

Reason number 1

All ages are submissive to love, as they say. There are times when both a young man and a mature lady of his heart are really interested in each other, in love, love comes.

And if the woman is wise, the guy truly loves his adult partner and the relationship develops, then the couple creates a strong family and lives in joy for many years. However, this alignment of events does not happen very often.

Reason number 2

The second reason lies in the psychology of personality. If young man, an adult woman appeared, most likely, the matter is in the low self-esteem of the womanizer. An older woman should raise the low self-esteem of a young man.

She is more experienced, she understands what a man needs and immediately provide it to him. No need to strain, show strong-willed efforts. In addition, it excludes the possibility of experiences of rejection that young guys can get from peers or from younger girls, because they are very demanding of their young people.

These girls also want their boyfriend to be a knight, make good money and look good. And young guys do not want or do not consider it necessary to embark on a difficult path, when you can easily gain experience, including social experience, with an older lady. This is called “self-affirmation at the expense of others”, in this case, at the expense of successful and experienced women.

As a rule, older women really do not require much from their young companions. Sometimes, I must say, young guys and adult women really love each other and start strong families. But more common are cases of so-called cohabitation of young people and adult women.

Moreover, both young people and their women are fully aware that after some time their union will break up. Women are worried about being abandoned. And yet, according to statistics, there are few such families, since this phenomenon is temporary.

By the way, men with low self-esteem can, on the contrary, be alone and not look for women in principle.

Reason number 3

The third reason comes from the psychology of upbringing received within the family. The young man receives a one-sided upbringing. He could get a false idea about the family as such, it could be an incomplete family or a family where the roles of a man and a woman were violated, and the mother was the main one in the family.

Before the eyes of such a young man there was no image of a real Man with masculine strength during the period of his personality formation. The young man does not know what male behavior looks like.

His mother was the Father in the family, and this was the reason why he did not receive truly maternal attention at a tender age, although he needed it, and the reason why, growing up, he sees in a mature woman a new “mother” for himself.

However, there are times when a man in adulthood goes against his upbringing and is looking for a woman much younger than himself as a companion.

Reason number 4

Another common reason today, where psychology, alas, is powerless is the material benefit from a relationship with a successful, prosperous woman with accumulated capital.

It can be, for example, an apartment or success, reputation. In this case, as a rule, both partners are aware of what their relationship is based on, and have no illusions about this.

Drawing conclusions

So, psychology clarified the situation for us a little and we found out the most common reasons why young guys like to build relationships with women older than themselves.

The question arises: will the whole life of a man be filled with affairs with older women? It depends only on him: the question is very individual, it is impossible to predict. Perhaps, after one such incident, a man will lose his desire to communicate with adult women, and perhaps one day this will become the beginning of a new family.

But, as human psychology says, the main thing is that in a couple both partners are happy and suit each other in all respects - only in this case, the relationship between a man and a woman can be considered harmonious and healthy.

There is no difference in age, there is a difference in mind (Vin Diesel).

Unequal alliances are commonplace in our time. However, the public is still surprised by women dating men who are significantly younger than them.

Romances between young men and older women still surprise many people

There is an opinion that a man cannot sincerely love a woman who is suitable for him as a mother. Like, a generational conflict is inevitable, and sooner or later a young man will get bored with an adult chosen one and want a young body. But, as practice shows, not all such unions are doomed ...

French President Emmanuel Macron, 40, and his 65-year-old wife Brigitte are celebrating their eleventh wedding anniversary this year. Once again, we will not retell their amazing love story, but we will only recall that the politician became interested in the ex-teacher a quarter of a century ago. Over the years, their feelings have only gotten stronger. Monsieur Macron, apparently, has long been tired of proving the sincerity of feelings for his wife.

“If I was 20 years older than my wife, no one would have thought to ask if we are suitable for each other. Since she is a couple of decades older than me, people around her constantly say that our feelings are insincere, and we cannot be together, ”the president shared with a Le Parisien correspondent.

French President Emmanuel Macron and his wife Brigitte do not notice the 25-year age difference

British actor Aaron Taylor-Johnson does not complain about his marriage either. 10 years ago, a young man fell in love with director Sam Taylor-Wood, who cast him in her film Becoming John Lennon. Then the public was skeptical about this union, and Aaron was mistaken for a gigolo. Spiteful critics were sure that the relationship would be short-lived: they say, the young actor had not yet worked up. Gloomy predictions did not come true: Taylor Johnson is still faithful to his wife, who is 24 years older than him.

According to Aaron, the tangible difference in age for them Sam does not play any role - rather, on the contrary, it plays into their hands.

“There is no distance between us, I certainly do not notice it. Friends often call me Benjamin Button because I am a real old man at heart, but Sam is young, ”the actor said in an interview with The Times.

There are many such examples and the list is endless. However, the fact remains that more and more young men prefer not their peers, but women who are noticeably older than themselves. Moreover, many representatives of the stronger sex quite consciously choose mature ladies as their life companions.

In 2006, American researchers conducted a survey among couples in which the woman is at least 10 years older than her boyfriend. During the survey, it turned out that most of all in their chosen ones, men value their age, the life wisdom attached to it and other qualities that, as a rule, come with experience.

Young men value in their mature passions, first of all, rich life experience

Interest in this topic was fueled by the book Older Women, Younger Men: New Options for Love and Romance. The authors of the bestseller, which has been repeatedly reprinted in the West, are two women who have rich experience in relationships with the opposite sex.

At one time, columnist and motivational speaker Felicia Brings and journalist Susan Winter set about asking as many men as possible who dated women much older than themselves. All for the sake of one goal - to find out why 20- and 30-year-old guys are not at all interested in peers. The concept did not come out of thin air: both Felicia and Susan were in relationships with the so-called toy-boys for a long time and know firsthand what it's like to live with a young boyfriend under the same roof. It turned out that the young men admire not so much the appearance as the character traits of the older ladies. What exactly? We will tell you about it right now.

An offer you can't refuse

It is believed that men, especially young ones, are afraid of mature and successful women like fire. However, as Brings and Winter found out, this stereotype is long outdated. On the contrary, many inexperienced guys tend to have an affair with older ladies. All because passion 40+ is enough confident and know exactly what they want- both from life and from your partner.

“I met Karolina at a party of our mutual friends. As soon as I saw her among the guests, I immediately realized that she was created for me. I did not pursue the goal of finding an older woman at all, and Carolina was not looking for a toy boy. Everything somehow happened by itself. I was then 39 years old, and she was 55. Our relationship is not built on sex, but on mutual trust, respect and love, ”Paolo shared with the authors of the book.

Young men like that their mature passions can maintain their composure in any situation.

So, why do older women catch young guys so much? One of the respondents, who identified himself as Neil, believes that the whole point is that mature women are honest with themselves and others and do not throw tantrums. As it turned out, many dream not of naive girls with whom there is something to do in the bedroom, but nothing to talk about, but of those with whom you can do both. Neil does not like that most of his peers are looking for a partner to create a family, and mature women not too eager to get married. He is pleased that the older mistresses do not see him only as a potential father of their children and the breadwinner of the family.

After a relationship with a mature woman, not everyone is drawn to young girls. Some men believe that there are only problems from peers: they are too infantile and invent problems from scratch.

According to one of the respondents, having started dating an older woman, he himself became more confident in himself. The young man is grateful to the ex-lover for the fact that she was ready to listen to him, but at the same time did not invade her personal space.

Valuable personnel

You can argue as much as you like that beauty rules the world, and men only dream of having an affair with a long-legged blonde. However, many representatives of the stronger sex are actually admired by down-to-earth realists who do not have to be beauties at all.

“In “adult” women, I value, above all, emotional stability. I met with both young and mature, but only with the second everything went well. They have always been frank with me. I didn’t even trust close friends as much as they did,” said a young man named Fred.

For many young people, not only sexual intimacy is important, but also emotional

By the way, Fred has an interesting personal life. When he was 21, he started dating 37-year-old Gretchen. For two years they lived together and even after parting continued to communicate closely. The couple's relationship was built on strong friendship, so the former lovers often see each other today and support each other in difficult situations. After breaking up with Gretchen, Fred tried dating girls who had just turned 20. According to the young man, it did not last long. As soon as his passions opened their mouths, he was ready to run away.

After a series of unsuccessful romances with peers, he met Lynn, who was 10 years older than him. No matter how trite it may sound, but only with her he could feel truly happy.

“Mature women have long found themselves. They exude stability. In addition, they are more experienced. You understand that you are dealing with a person who will directly tell you what he wants. They are much more confident than people my age. Personally, it is much more pleasant for me to meet a woman older than myself: you don’t have to always solve some puzzles, but you can immediately discuss the problem, ”Fred said during an interview.

Lenny agreed with him. According to the man, he is attracted to older women by an incredible inner calmness. Many mistakenly assume that such unions are similar to the relationship of mother and son. Lenny claims that this is not at all the case: his adult passions simply had no time to mess with him - they were busy with their careers.

“Adult women have completely changed my preferences. I feel terribly sad with young girls, ”the young man shared his opinion.

Lenny revealed that his last relationship was perfect, but he had to end it anyway. All because he dreamed of a child, and his passion did not want to give birth at an age when many are already becoming grandmothers.

Let them talk

Many men often have to face criticism from others because they prefer women older than themselves.

“Men were just jealous of me, because I achieved the location of such a beauty. They looked at me like I had something they never got their hands on. It is curious that my peers also did not approve of a relationship with a mature woman. Well, to be honest, I didn’t care: every morning I woke up with the feeling that the whole world was at my feet. Probably, it seemed to others that I just want to assert myself in this way. But I just felt good with my beloved. I was proud of her and who I became next to her, ”said a man named Barry about his ex.

bed scene

“The advantage is that they are not afraid to talk about their desires. No need to play guessing game. Sex with older women, in my opinion, is the best, ”a guy named Scott opened up.

He was supported by other young people. “It was a phenomenal experience! I kept thinking about how to please her. Fortunately, I didn’t have to rack my brains: she herself told me. It was very cool. It felt like I had broken some huge barrier. In general, in sexual terms, we completely coincided, ”admitted Russ.

Who would have guessed that such men are turned on by ... rich life experience their mistresses. “The mere thought that an older woman can teach me a lot turns me on. It's kind of an erotic adventure for me," says Vincent.

A man named Mel explained why he was no longer drawn to make love with peers. According to the young man, girls of his age, although beautiful, are mostly clamped. Another thing is experienced women. In bed, they do everything thoroughly and are not shy about anything.

Many young people are attracted to the fact that mature women behave freely and are not afraid to talk about their desires.

“I only learned how to make love when I met a mature woman. She just took my hand and whispered, “Slow down a little.” I had just turned 20 and I was just happy that I could sleep with her. But then I realized that technique is important, ”said Rick.

Many of the men surveyed said that they had the best sex with ladies who are noticeably older than them. They agreed that mature women are the most skillful mistresses.

Many young girls think that if they act cheeky, they will be more attractive to men than women who already have some experience in relationships with men - in fact, they just drive men crazy. Do you know the reasons why men like older women and why they find them sexier than younger ones? Today we will talk about ten reasons for this male preference.

1) Adult women control their hormones

The older the woman, the less likely she is to have the irrational emotional outbursts of her younger friend. This means that older women put a lot less emotional pressure on a guy. This is why men are attracted to young women who are mature for their age.

2) Grown-up women know what they do in bed

Practice makes adult women perfect and charming, because they have several sexual tricks in store!

There is more assurance here that she is aware of her sexuality and knows exactly how her body works and knows what to do to satisfy her boyfriend in bed.

3) Adult women are not obsessed with the ideal figure of a skinny model.

Men are attracted to real beautiful women. Many of them have already had children and therefore they are not obsessed with perfection. They know that they have flaws, they also know that it will not affect the pleasure they can give or receive.

4) Older women don't tend to label a man as their "boyfriend".

When a woman puts less pressure on a man and does not seek to control his every move, then they can focus more on the pleasures of communicating with each other.

5) Older women are more independent.

She probably had her own successful career or family ... basically, she has her own life. An adult woman is not going to revolve her life around a young guy, she has her own priorities, but he is a nice addition to her.

6) Older women know how to show power

Men love the fact that a woman won't let him follow her. She knows what she wants, she knows where and how she wants. When a woman takes control, she's sexy!

7) Older women value their young lovers rather than nag them.

She is smart and understanding enough to annoy a young man with her whining. She appreciates their joint relationship and wants to spend them in love and harmony, and not in scandals and a showdown.

8) Older women have their own money, perhaps their own car, and their own apartment.

There is no hope for a young man because she pretty much has everything she needs for life. She cannot want to live with him, and will not rely on him for everything. It's an equal playing field.

9) Older women have experience

Older women have experience in love, life, relationships, careers…. What makes a conversation between her and a man more intelligent, interesting and fruitful! Guys love it when they have a smart woman!

10) Older women are less selfish in bed

Perhaps it has something to do with the desire to give more, because they are grateful for the attention they receive from a hot young man.