It is often said that the one who truly loves will definitely return. It is not true. The one who truly loves will never leave. If a man loves he will return
She silently turned away and walked out the door.
“Where are you?” someone asked.
But she didn't answer. And only the wind, waving goodbye to her, quietly whispered:
- She's never coming back.
"Never," Echo repeated, and melted away into the cold void.
For some reason, everyone around is sure that a loving person will never leave. There is an insane amount of quotes, opinions and smart sayings, in which the whole meaning comes down to one thing: "If he loves, he won't leave", "If he loves, he won't let go."
Believe me, he will leave and let go. He will leave when he realizes that He has no place in your life. And he will let go when he is finally convinced that your place is where He does not exist.
When you love, you see in a person all his shortcomings, but by combining them together you turn them into one great virtue, which you call Personality. smile, kiss or hug. If you love, then His habits gradually become Yours, you guess his desires, thoughts, moods. You open the door to your soul for this Person and give him your heart. You raise him to the highest level, and support him so that he does not fall .. . How else? After all, to love is to make a person happy and help him in everything!
And so it goes on for some time. You give without demanding anything in return, he takes... And you seem to be happy. But one day...
One day, waking up in the middle of the night, you feel the penetrating cold of a draft. "What is it?" - with bewilderment you look into your soul, and you see... No one... Only emptiness.
You gave everything you had, emptied your soul to the last drop. And then comes the understanding that the person you let into your life did not enter it, but remained somewhere out there, outside of it, but took everything What could you offer him?
But how to believe it? The heart is overwhelmed with worries, experiences: What if something happened? Suddenly need help?! And you are anxiously trying to look into the soul of a person who was once dear to you, and you stumble upon a huge lock on the door ... And at the threshold lies your heart, dusty and cracked. But you don’t leave again, you quietly raise your heart, wipe it off and knock on the door. But no one comes up ... and inside you can hear music and loud laughter.
After a long wait, the door finally opens, and He stands on the threshold, smiling his wide beloved smile:
-Oh, hi! Did you bring something?
- Yes. My heart. Do you remember I gave it to you?
-Oh yes! I remember. Leave it here, I'll pick it up later...
If he loves, will he leave?
If he loves, will he not let go?
Will leave. And let go. Stumbling into indifference. Leave, tired of the cold and loneliness. And not in order to find a replacement, but just to keep warm. He will leave without looking back, and will firmly close the door ... with a lock ... with a thousand locks. And no matter what happens next, the main thing is NOT to look back! Let the tears choke, let it hurt in the chest - FORWARD, TOWARDS THE WIND ..
Where are you?” Someone asked.
but she didn't answer...
And the worst thing is that such people never come back! ..
To return a loved one will help only his love. If he loves, he will return himself. Give it a chance. It will put everything on the shelves, as it sees fit. Don't interfere with it, otherwise it will be played against you.
I will tell a couple of cases from life, which will confirm the words about self-return.
P first story. Zhenya and Zhenya met at graduation. At the time when it was three years from the date of their acquaintance - Zhenya (young man), suddenly, decides that it's time to leave. Zhenya (a woman), all teary-eyed, calls her friends. They are in shock. Nobody expected this to happen. What happened was very unusual, due to the fact that the couple was very friendly. It turns out that Zhenya (the young man) was just tired. Tired of what he sees, every day, the same girl in front of his eyes. He needed rest. And the woman Zhenya was crying and worried. She managed to get used to her young man - namesake. And she didn't want to lose him. Love as well as was.
Zhenya, a few weeks later, returned to Zhenya. They are still seeing each other. Indeed, the woman is running away from the registry office for the third time. Zhenya is angry, naturally, but endures. It seems that he does not plan to leave Zhenechka. Believe it or not, they have been together for nine years! And they do not live together, but see each other, spending the night, in turn, a friend with a friend. The girl is quite happy with it.
IN The second story is not a story with a happy ending. The woman and the boy saw each other for a couple of years. Later, somehow, in the evening, at the next meeting, the woman saw that her young man had changed a lot in relation to her. Women's intuition shouted SOS. And she was right: the young man, indeed, grew cold. But the circumstance is different. He was not afraid that the other had children (a boy and a girl), despite the fact that he claimed that he did not want other people's children. He left. The woman was worried, killed, cried. She begged him to return. I bombarded him with messages and called - the guy changed his number. Determined where he lives, came, any evening, to the entrance. The young man took his passion and changed his place of residence. And he told all his friends not to betray him. At the time when the woman asked them where her beloved was, they said they did not know. They know, like, only at the time when he left.
The woman went to fortune tellers. In addition, she did spells. Nothing helped at all. How to return a loved one? A love spell will not help if the soul does not lie with some kind of person. The woman struggled, tried. At the time when she felt that she was powerless, she committed an unthinkable act: she went to a monastery. It was difficult for her, at first, in it. But she is used to it, and she is not going to leave, “Probably,” from there. She decided, for herself, that she would no longer allow men to hurt her. Her friends and girlfriends come to her, and her relatives do not forget. Indeed, not everyone understands her act.
If you wish to return
- Do not ring, thousands of times, on landline and home phones. Obsession is bad nonsense that interferes in many things.
- Not a guard, invariably, his at home. At the entrance - even more so. If, a couple of times, this happened - try so that it does not happen again.
- Don't bother with your tears. The fact that you will cry in his presence will not help. By and large, men do not adore the tears of ladies, although they touch some.
Your girlfriends say he won't come back? Don't trust them. They don't know what will happen next. As does every person. Live in hope, not versions. Think anything is possible. But thoughts are not something that necessarily comes true.
Optimism has not yet been canceled. If it’s hard to be an optimist, try to remain just a person in whom there is a large amount of optimism. It is much easier to live with him (with optimism). And not only those who suffer because of love. Optimists Easier invariably. In addition to those who are very joyful.
If he directly told you that he would not return, do not look for an excuse for torment. It is always possible to find a replacement. It is true that there are no irreplaceable people. Just give yourself time. It will heal you. Do not expect a quick result, for the reason that you will have to wait specifically. Expect, if you wish, that the time-treatment be successful. And don't be surprised that time will drag on like chewing gum. The wait can get. If the young man asked to give him the opportunity to think about everything - give, do not be greedy. Someday, you will realize that it was not in vain that you were not greedy. And it doesn't matter what happens next between you. Every action you take is a school of life. You, through such actions, gain experience. A lot of experience, albeit not positive.
If a man really fell in love with another, it is unrealistic to return him. Men, like women, are blown away by great love. They give everything to their beloved lady, completely dissolving in her. Not noticing anything about, they live and breathe the one that is so dear to them.
Don't be upset! You will only make it worse for yourself. Violation is not a psychologist. By the way, you can go to a psychologist if you do not feel hostility towards people of such professions. One hour with a psychologist - a lot will change. Basically, be honest with him, don't hide anything. Express any of your ideas.
Do you love being alone when you're not feeling well? Leave, for example, in the village. Or to the cottage. Drive in the direction where, according to your point of view, real harmony reigns. If hope does not leave you - live with it, do not drive it away. You know, everything is not uncommon in life. And the fact that a loved one returns is not the rarest case. He may return. When is unknown. For the reason that he himself may not know at the time when this might happen. Men say that ladies are very unpredictable personalities. Men are no less the same. They just, for some reason, love to deny their unpredictability.
Don't lose faith in the best. If you lose it, it will be difficult to find. Yes, you, most likely, will not want to look for her anymore, because you will begin to be disappointed in life. And she is in you. This mutual disappointment is dust, which should be disposed of urgently.
There is another method... Chat with someone from your family. Later, at the end of the conversations, put all your conclusions into one mosaic. See how easy it becomes for you. You will be able to act rationally, and not think only with your heart! Do you have relatives? Perfect! They don't want anything bad for you. These are the recommendations of a psychologist.
Methods and means. - How to make you love?
Circumstances To adore a guy, a man.- Why do you adore him? For what?
Is it necessary to return it? - How to forget the guy who threw?
Source:
Psychologist's recommendations. Methods and means. To return a loved one will help only his love. If he loves, he will return himself. Give it a chance. It will put everything on the shelves, as needed
http://citytile.ru/medicine/esli-muzhchina-ljubit-on-vernetsja.html
If a man loves he will return
What to do to prevent this from happening?
1. Do not bother him on the phone, that you can’t even a day without him, that you can’t eat, sleep, or go to the toilet. What is he to blame for if you are separated by quite weighty circumstances (work, trip to the South, etc.)?
2. Try to find something interesting for yourself (whether it's rollerblading, cross-stitching, showing off your tongue to passers-by, it's all up to you). According to the principle: "Whatever the child amuses, if only he does not cry."
3. If you acutely feel that you are about to start texting him and you are not sure that you will stop until morning, do this: write, but do not send. Or write texts to him on paper, or on a computer. You can pour out all your emotions, remember the first day you met, describe your first kiss, etc. When he returns and reads, he will carry you in his arms (verified).
Understand if he doesn't call as often as you would like, doesn't text, maybe he's just busy and needs to sort things out, and that takes some time to sort out work (parents, friends, finances). Give him some time, don't ring every five minutes. If he really loves you, he will announce himself as soon as he finally “rules” the situation. And if you sort things out: “Where have you been? You forgot me, didn’t love me, didn’t want to, that’s why you flew away, ”he will tell you where to fly, or walk far and for a long time.
On the contrary, you should stir up interest in him, and not look like an obsessive psychopath. For example: “Honey, how are you? Glad to hear from you. Today I was visiting friends, went bowling. I miss you, I love you, I love you."
Checked. Feeling your independence, he will write you a bunch of SMS and call you every hour. And then, how - a man is a true hunter, and you made him be in constant tension. Keep it up!
Source:
If a man loves he will return
What to do to prevent this from happening? 1. Do not pester him on the phone that you can not even a day without him, that you can neither eat, nor sleep, nor go to the toilet. He is to blame if you are divided
http://melochi-jizni.ru/publ/38-1-0-950
How to return a beloved guy, a man?
How to return Love, interest, attention of an ex-boyfriend, man?
Psychologist's advice. Ways and means.
Only love can bring back a loved one. If he loves, he will return. Give it a chance. It will put everything on the shelves, as it sees fit. Do not interfere with it, otherwise it will "play" against you.
How to return a beloved guy, a man?
I will tell you a few cases from life, which will confirm the words about “self-return”.
P first story. Zhenya and Zhenya met at graduation. When it was three years from the date of their acquaintance - Zhenya (boyfriend), suddenly, decides that it's time to leave. Zhenya (girl), all teary-eyed, calls her friends. They are in shock. Nobody expected this to happen. What happened was very strange, because the couple were very friendly. It turns out that Zhenya (guy) is just tired. Tired of seeing, every day, the same girl in front of his eyes. He needed rest. And the girl Zhenya was crying and worried. She managed to get used to her boyfriend - namesake. And she didn't want to lose him. Love, too, was present.
Zhenya, two weeks later, returned to Zhenya. They are still dating. True, the girl runs away from the registry office for the third time. Zhenya is angry, naturally, but endures. It seems that he is not going to leave Zhenechka. Believe it or not, they have been together for nine years! And they do not live together, but meet, spending the night, alternately, with each other. The girl is very happy with it.
IN The second story is not a story with a happy ending. The girl and the guy met for several years. Then, somehow, in the evening, at the next meeting, the girl noticed that her young man had changed a lot in relation to her. Women's intuition shouted "SOS". And she was right: the guy really cooled off. But the reason is different. He was not afraid that the "other" had children (a boy and a girl), although he claimed that he did not want other people's children. He left. The girl was worried, killed, cried. She begged him to come back. I bombarded him with messages and called - the guy changed his number. She found out where he lives, came, every evening, to the entrance. The guy took his passion and changed his place of residence. And he told all his friends not to betray him. When the girl asked them where her beloved was, they said that they did not know. They know, like, only when he left.
The girl went to fortune tellers. She even did spells. Nothing helped at all. How to return a loved one? A love spell will not help if the soul does not lie with some kind of person. The girl struggled, tried. When she felt that she was powerless, she did an incredible deed: she went to a convent. It was difficult for her, at first, in it. But she got used to it, and, apparently, she does not plan to leave from there. She decided, for herself, that she would no longer allow men to hurt her. Friends and girlfriends come to her, and her relatives do not forget. True, not everyone understands her act.
If you want to return beloved boyfriend, man - do not do these things:
- Do not ring, thousands of times, on landline and home phones. Obsession is bad nonsense that interferes in many things.
- Not a guard, all the time, his at home. At the entrance - even more so. If, several times, this has happened, try not to repeat it.
- Don't bother with your tears. It won't help if you cry in his presence. In general, men do not like the tears of women, although they touch some.
Your girlfriends say he won't come back? Don't trust them. They don't know what will happen next. Just like any other person. Live in hope, not speculation. You can think whatever you want. But thoughts are not something that necessarily comes true.
Optimism has not yet been canceled. If it’s hard to be an optimist, try to remain exactly the person in whom there is a lot of optimism. It is much easier to live with him (with optimism). And not only those who suffer because of love. Optimists Easier always. Even those who are very happy.
If he directly told you that he would not return, do not look for a reason for torment. You can always find a replacement. It is true that there are no irreplaceable people. Just give yourself time. It will heal you. Do not expect a quick result, because you will definitely have to wait. Wait if you want the time cure to be successful. And don't be surprised that time will drag on like chewing gum. The wait can get. If the guy asked to give him the opportunity to think about everything - give, do not be greedy. Someday, you will realize that it was not in vain that you were greedy. And it doesn't matter what happens next between you. Every action you take is a school of life. You, through such actions, gain experience. A lot of experience, albeit not a positive one.
If a man, seriously, fell in love with another, it is impossible to return him. In men, as in women, great love breaks the roof. They give everything to their beloved woman, completely dissolving in her. Not noticing anything around, they live and breathe the one that is so dear to them.
Don't be upset! You'll only make it worse for yourself. Disorder is not a psychologist. By the way, you can go to a psychologist if you do not feel hostility towards people of such professions. One hour with a psychologist - a lot will change. Most importantly, be honest with him, do not hide anything. Express any of your thoughts.
Do you like to be alone when you feel bad? Leave, for example, in the village. Or to the cottage. Go where, in your opinion, real harmony reigns. If hope does not leave you - live with it, do not drive it away. You know, everything happens in life. And the fact that a loved one returns is not the rarest case. He may return. When is unknown. Because he himself, probably, does not know when this can happen. Men say that women are very unpredictable personalities. Men are no less the same. They just, for some reason, like to deny their unpredictability.
Don't lose faith in the best. If you lose it, it will be hard to find. Yes, you, most likely, will not want to look for her anymore, as you will finally begin to be disappointed in life. And she is in you. This "mutual disappointment" is dust that should be disposed of immediately.
There is another way…. Talk to someone close. Then, after talking, put all your conclusions into one mosaic. See how easy it becomes for you. You will be able to act rationally, and not think solely with your heart! Do you have close people? Great! They don't wish you well. These are the advice of a psychologist.
No matter how smart theories we explain what is happening in our lives, we are doomed to experience, to live all this with our feelings. Intellectually, we may not agree with this or that event, but, one way or another, we will have to go through everything, Abbot Eumenius writes in his article.
There are no psychotherapeutic approaches, techniques, medicines that can help to quickly stop situations associated with parting with a once loved one. Conscientious psychologists in such cases admit their own impotence and say: “You just have to survive it.”
A psychologist can only push a person to more decisive action in the search and accompany him along this path so that he does not do stupid things, but the spark of love itself is a miracle that is not subject to anyone.
First of all, it is important to note that there is "blind" love, in which there is a lot of passion, a lot of biochemistry, a lot of love madness. This is given to us so that it has time to transform into “sighted” love. I want to give an example of the latter here.
A similar story happened to the parents of my good friend. When he was 11-12 years old, his father began to go to a neighbor to "repair the tap". The faucet leaked very often. Almost every day he repaired it for two or even three hours. Repaired for two months. Such a very fastidious crane was caught ... One day he returned and said to his wife:
"Ira, I'm leaving."
"Now I will live with Any."
And she let him go.
What does "let go" mean? It means letting go psychologically, internally, economically – on all levels. I asked her: “Irina Petrovna, how did you manage to do this?” She said, “This man has made me happy for 15 years. And that's enough for me. If now it is important for him to be happy not in the way I understand, but in the way he understands and wants, so be it. I will be thankful to the grave for what he has already given me.”
It seems to me that sometimes love is about letting go of a person, at least at the level of actions and deeds: don’t get in, don’t break in, don’t get into his life with your manipulations. Just leave the person alone.
True love knows how to let go.
If the image of a beloved (but not mutually) person haunts us, haunts us, feelings cloud the mind, we mentally thank him again and let him go. We can, like some kind of mantra, like a spell, speak in ourselves to a pop-up image:
“Thank you so much for being in my life. I'm letting you go."
We also thank God for this situation and release the person. Gratitude has a powerful healing power.
If a person has already left our life, and we all decide “will he return or not return?”, “how to return?”, “maybe try to talk again?”, then most likely we love our own feeling about the person, not himself, because he does not choose to be with us.
There was a case when I had to advise a man from whom a girl left. He was on the verge of a very serious spiritual crisis, he even grumbled at God. It took us a long time to learn to let go. I told him a story about how a writer once caught a wild coyote and put him on a chain. The coyote rushed towards the forest for a long time, tried to break the chain with a run, rubbed his neck with a collar until it bled. Such is the property of his breed, which does not agree with lack of freedom. And the writer understood: if you love, let him go.
If this coyote is truly yours, it will come back to you. And if not yours, he will never be happy with you.
If you are “stuck” on the pain and tragedy of a breakup, as on some kind of obsession, you need to learn by willpower to switch from obsessive thoughts, get involved in life “here and now”, get out of the state of obsession. The most dangerous thing in this state is to urgently look for another “object” in order to switch to the intensity of feelings. When the "nerve of falling in love" is highly inflamed, don't rush to look for "love" in someone else.
Rest, cool down a little from the love fever, come to a normal, normal state. If the image of another person is still alive in the heart, a new love will be an attempt to transfer feelings regarding the previous partner to a new person.
And if we trust God, then when the Father takes away our favorite toy, we unclench our fists, realizing that God understands better what we need now. An unbelieving person can listen to the depths of himself in meditation, see the situation in the perspective of earthly life, along the way in the perspective of eternity ...
I want to encourage all lovers who have been abandoned or rejected. If a loved one can leave you, then your destiny will not leave you. And if someone left your life, then this is not your destiny. Your destiny, your train will never leave you.
I answer .... Yes, oddly enough ... Both are more than successful in their careers and social life, outwardly attractive, there are such ideal couples who are always visible in the crowd and who are always set as an example to everyone. And we were like that - relatives and friends still wonder why we are not together in the end. The reasons are:
1. Both leaders, while I was ready to give in on many issues, but the further, the more impossible things he demanded of me - to refuse to communicate with friends, colleagues (outside of work) and even parents (terrible mutual hostility). I was not ready for compromises - 100% of the time outside of work (time was measured by the minute) I had to devote to him and only to him. Even meeting with a friend once a year is a scandal. As a result, over the years I have been left without friends with him. Although at the same time surrounded by care and attention.
2. His restrictions and requirements became tougher and deeper over time, at some point I realized that if you do what he wants, then ME will not remain. The psychologist, to whom he dragged me, when I was leaving for good, explained that he had some kind of cockroach from his relationship with his mother and from childhood, which explains this behavior. For him, the only proof of love is the fact when a partner steps on his principles and values for his sake, refuses them. Those. someone needs words, someone needs gifts, someone needs daily care to be sure that they are loved. But he needed to see how I break myself for him. And he wouldn't stop. Why did they live so long - at first I refused what really didn’t seem to matter to me, then from more serious things, reluctantly, then he had already reached the point that was unshakable for me. And again he demanded to refuse. He wanted absolute dependence on him. This option is suitable for someone, provided that he financially provides above the roof, and does not change, and takes care of him, like behind a stone wall in the literal sense, plus he is very good in sex. But I already had nothing ... Although I tried, honestly. They went to the psychologist too late, I was already broken and didn’t want anything, although she could help, of course. But I refused, it was too hard for me, there were too many scandals (we both have an Italian temperament) and a lot of hurtful words were said. He crossed my line.
3. my cockroach is already here - he is madly in love and wanted children, and I have infertility. I constantly rotted myself for this ... Treatments, snot, tears, operations, in a circle and to no avail. At the same time, he supported as best he could, even the doctors were surprised that there were still such men - and he made his way through quarantine to hold his hand after the operation, lubricate his lips with water when it was still impossible to drink, and bring / carry the duck, and was on duty with me at night, and a lot of things we went through together. But it didn’t work ((I know that he will be an ideal father, I didn’t want to deprive him of this. I categorically rejected the adoption, we didn’t reach the surrogate mother because of the first 2 points - I left before we decided on this.
It was hard for me to realize that I was depriving him of children because of my problems. He said that he wants to live with me, even if there are no children, although he madly wants a child. That I am dearer to him than the rest of everything - it’s better with me like that than without me, but with children. But during the scandals, he could screw up something on this topic, and it hurt more than anything else ... to the point of physical pain.
Don't know. They did a lot of things. It was necessary to go to a psychologist earlier, and not reinvent the wheel and torture each other. then everything would be fine. With him, we had moments of absolute happiness, when "the whole world will wait" - and very often, but there were also moments of absolute total unhappiness, when everyone tried to put pressure on the most painful point (((I'm tired of this .... there would be a child , for sure, many questions were removed.In our particular case.Even the psychologist confirmed this.
