Family education of a child and its meaning briefly. The importance of family education in child development. Traditional parenting roles

5. ABOUT THE IMPORTANCE OF FAMILY EDUCATION

In his book “Family Raising a Child” and him significance P. F. Lesgaft outlined the scientific foundations of family education of children, he put forward the requirement to parents: “to spare the personality of their child,” showed how important it is to combine a certain freedom of activity for children (observation of the activities of adults, phenomena of the surrounding life, clarifying the connection between them, etc. ...) and reasonable guidance, any and attention to their needs and requirements on the part of parents.P. F. Lesgaft especially emphasized the period of family education from the date of birth of the child until entering school (until the end of the seventh year), to which he attached very important importance in the development of a person’s personality. “During the family period of a child’s life,” wrote Lesgaft, “his type is formed, he learns the customs and habits of a given area and family, and therefore this period has a great influence on a person’s life and leaves an almost indelible mark on his entire future existence.” . F. Lesgaft saw the main task of parents as being to create conditions in the family that would allow children from an early age to develop freely and harmoniously and to participate as much as possible in the activities of adults. Properly delivered family education, according to Lesgaft, should create a normal type of child, preserve and develop his most valuable qualities: impressionability to everything around him, initiative, responsiveness, sincerity, truthfulness, interest in knowledge, etc. The main ways for the development of the normal type Lesgaft considered: the child's personal initiative c. thoughts and actions, the opportunity to check with a close and loving person about your doubts and misunderstandings and the desire to overcome obstacles on your own. He wrote: “It is necessary to remember that you cannot make a child a human being, but you can only facilitate this and not interfere, so that he develops a human being within himself. It is necessary that he develop an ideological person and strive to be guided by the ideal in life.” In the book “Family education of a child and its significance, Lesgaft put forward the following main requirements for the organization of education in the family: cleanliness, consistency in word and deed when dealing with a child, absence arbitrariness in the actions of the teacher, recognition of the child’s personality, treatment of him as a person. “The whole secret of family education,” wrote Lesgaft, “is to give the child the opportunity to develop himself, to do everything on his own; adults should not run around and do nothing for their personal facilities And pleasure, and always treat the child from the first day of his birth as a person, with full recognition of his personality...” Corporal punishment of children is completely unacceptable. They are harmful from a biological, psychological and pedagogical point of view. “A child who has grown up under the constant use of them is a sharp and isolated type,” wrote Lesgaft. - Its characteristic features are suspicion, harshness and angularity of actions, isolation, dull and slow reaction to external impressions, manifestations of petty pride and abrupt antics, giving way to complete apathy.” Recommending creating the necessary conditions for children so that they can “live the life of a child,” Lesgaft demanded from parents and educators strictly deliberate, consistent actions, providing for the development in children of the skills of concentration, discipline, finishing their work, the ability to overcome obstacles and difficulties in achieving their goals.P. F. Lesgaft was familiar with the practice of Froebel kindergartens abroad, as well as Russian paid kindergartens in St. Petersburg and considered them institutions that did not meet the requirements for the proper upbringing and development of children: “Gathering children for general, systematic classes from two and a half to three years of age, when they only repeat (imitate) everything around them and when they still have neither observation nor experience that contribute to their reasoning and more or less independent actions, only herd manifestations can be supported and developed in them, to the detriment of their individual inclinations and development their character."

Lesgaft opposed the systematized and strictly regulated games and activities recommended by Froebel. He believed that the content of children's first games and activities should have the imprint of the social environment that surrounds them, and uniquely reflect the activities of people close to them. Lesgaft pointed out that when choosing means of education, parents and teachers should take into account such valuable qualities of the child as impressionability, receptivity, the desire for independent processing of what is perceived, for a variety of activities and games. “All this is possible only when, when raising a child, a certain tendency is not pursued, the child is not broken by the system, and every initiative is not prevented... “In no case,” he wrote, “can one agree that the initial games and the first his activities were systematized or were put into a mold by educators and parents completely unfamiliar with the nature and individuality of the child.” P. F. Lesgaft basically correctly criticized Froebel's system. He wrote: “The theoretical foundations of Froebel (a follower of Hegel) do not stand up to any criticism: they indicate the author’s insufficient knowledge of the nature of the child and the course of his development. Froebel’s fantastic reasoning is too groundless and does not clarify the theoretical foundations of his system.” Lesgaft considered it possible to use only individual games and activities of Froebel in the family education of children, but on the basis of a different methodology. He wondered why quite wealthy parents often sent their only child to kindergarten, and believed that sending children to kindergarten “could only be allowed in the absence of parents or... their inability to take care of their children.” Recognizing the existence of kindergartens only as an inevitability and necessity for children deprived of parental care and care, Lesgaft insisted that the educational work in them be radically changed, so that they take on a completely different character. A kindergarten should be like a simple family, he believed, and have comfortable premises; children should be given greater freedom in games and activities, especially in the open air. Pointing out that the natural and irreplaceable teacher of children of preschool and preschool age is an educated mother, Lesgaft considered the development of female education in Russia a necessary and urgent task. Valuable views deserve special mention P. F. Lesgaft on the important role of games and toys in the education of preschool children in the family and kindergarten. He highly valued games as a means of physical, mental and moral education of children. He recommended that parents and educators widely use the desire of preschool children to make homemade toys that give them great pleasure and satisfaction. “It is much more profitable for a child if he prepares all the objects of his activities or entertainment for himself than if he is presented with prepared and variously decorated toys with various mechanisms and transformations incomprehensible to him; they will only amaze him, and he will immediately break them in order to find out the cause of the phenomena he noticed.”

6. PSYCHOLOGY OF FAMILY EDUCATION.
The family is the most important institution of socialization, as it is the usual environment for the existence and development of a person from birth to death. The style of family socialization is associated with national culture, traditions, and within their framework - with social affiliation, level of education, and moral attitudes of parents. These circumstances influence the nature of raising children.
There are three main styles of child socialization: authoritarian, democratic and liberal.
The authoritarian style looks like a strict declaration by parents of the demands they place on the child. Force pressure, aggression, dictatorship, callousness and coldness, and unceremoniousness in relationships flourish in the family.
Liberalism in the family is characterized by indifference and connivance, the dominance of isolation and alienation. Everyone is busy with their own affairs, worries, thoughts. Parents who adhere to this style believe that freedom creates independence in children. However, children in such families are often deprived of attention and care and end up neglected and homeless.
Democracy is based on mutual interest, support and mutual assistance. With an authoritarian style, children's needs are suppressed, and with a liberal style, they are ignored. In a democratic family, there is constant, unobtrusive control over the progress of the educational process and the development of the child.
The main direction in the typology of family education is the study of educational parental attitudes and positions. The optimal parental position meets the requirements of adequacy, flexibility and predictability.
The adequacy of the parental position is the desire to understand the individuality of their child, a vision of the changes taking place in his mental world. Predictiveness lies in the fact that the style of communication should precede the emergence of new typical and personal qualities of children. The flexibility of the parental position is considered as the ability to change educational influences on the child in accordance with changing living conditions of the family.
Some authors dealing with the problem of raising children have tried to base the description of types of upbringing on the degree of expression of the emotional attitude of parents towards their child:
1. Education based on the type of love and acceptance. The generalized formula of parental attitude is “The child is the center of my interests.” His parents constantly work with him, are gentle, and care about his life.
2. Rejection and rejection of the child. A generalized formula of parental attitude: “I don’t love this child, I won’t take care of him or worry about him.” Parents are inattentive to the child, show harshness or cruelty, and are determined to communicate with him as little as possible.
In other studies, attention was focused on identifying the degree of freedom of the child in the family, that is, on the regulation of his behavior by parents. With this approach, two extreme types are identified - excessive care and excessive demands.
1. Overprotective parenting. Parents' educational formula: “I will do everything for the child and for the child.” The behavior of parents can be traced with connivance combined with excessive guardianship.
2. Education according to the type of excessive demands. Parents' educational formula: "I don't want a child the way he is." Parents constantly criticize their child’s behavior and rarely praise or encourage them.
The third group of scientists, analyzing the types of upbringing, came to the conclusion that a more accurate assessment lies not in one, but in several aspects. On the one hand, the emotional aspect of the attitude of parents towards children is important, on the other hand, the reflection of behavior. The combination of these aspects gives four types of education:
1) A warm, friendly attitude towards the child combined with giving him independence and initiative;
2) Cold permissive upbringing, in which there is some coldness towards the child due to a lack of parental feelings, combined with giving him freedom,
3) Warm, restrictive parenting, which is characterized by an emotionally intense attitude towards the child combined with excessive control over his behavior;
4) Cold, restrictive upbringing, which is accompanied by constant criticism of the child, nagging, and sometimes systematic punishment for independent actions.
Recently, another approach has been identified, based not on a two-number, but on a three-number model of education. Three aspects of relationships are identified: sympathy - antipathy, respect - disrespect, proximity - distance. The combination of these aspects of the relationship allows us to distinguish eight types of parenting.
Effective parenting is based on sympathy, respect and closeness between parents and children. The formula of the parental attitude is: “I want my child to be happy, I will help him.” In the family there is a warm emotional tone of communication, parents’ sympathy for the interests and hobbies of their children, and respect for their rights.
Distanced parenting is also based on affection and respect, but there is a greater distance between parents and children. Family education formula: “Look what a wonderful child I have, it’s a pity that I don’t have enough time to communicate with him.” Parents highly value the child, his appearance, his successes, his abilities, but gentle treatment goes hand in hand with the inability to be there and help the child in his problems.
Effective pity is based on intimacy, sympathy, but there is no respect. The parenting formula is as follows: “Although my child is not smart and physically developed enough, he is still my child, and I love him.” This style of emotional attitude towards a child is characterized by awareness of real and sometimes imaginary deviations in his physical and mental development. As a result, parents come to the idea of ​​​​the exclusivity of their child. In communicating with him, they follow the path of granting special privileges and in every possible way protect him from harmful influences. Thus, parents show distrust in the child’s capabilities and abilities.
Education according to the type of condescending detachment is based on sympathy, disrespect, and large interpersonal distance. The formula for family education looks something like this: “You can’t help but blame my child for not being smart and physically developed enough.” The child’s ill-being is his unspoken right; parents do not interfere in his affairs and contacts with peers and other people; they are not sufficiently oriented in his mental world.
Rejection is based on antipathy, disrespect, and large interpersonal distance. This attitude of parents towards children is quite rare; the formula of the parental position is expressed as follows: “This child gives me unpleasant feelings and an unwillingness to deal with him.” The parent distances himself from the child, becomes cold and unapproachable, does not notice his presence, and does not want to communicate with him.
Contempt. In this type of relationship there is disrespect and small interpersonal distance. This attitude towards children corresponds to the following parental formula: “I am tormented and suffering because my child is so undeveloped, stubborn, cowardly, and unpleasant to other people.” Communication between parents and children is based on urging, edification, and demands. The parent ignores the child’s successes and achievements, does not notice them, and focuses only on negative facts. Such parents constantly visit specialists out of a desire to correct their child.
The pursuit. This type of parental attitude is based on disrespect and antipathy, but closeness to the child exists. Education is based on the formula: “My child is a scoundrel, and I will prove it to him.” Parenting methods correspond to the parents' firm belief in the depravity of the child. Parents try to break him with excessive severity and strict control; they constantly come into conflict with him. At the same time, they often resort to help from the public.
Refusal is based on antipathy, respect and great interpersonal distance. Parents distance themselves from the child's problems. They watch him from afar, recognizing his strength and the value of certain personal qualities. When relations worsen, such parents willingly resort to the help of the public and strive to entrust the process of raising their child to the school.
In real life, the existing type of parental education can change under the influence of circumstances and certain events. The behavior of parents from the birth of a child to his growing up rarely corresponds to only one of the listed types; it is important which particular attitude has become dominant for the parents at the moment.
One of the leading aspects of family relationships is communication. Researchers V. Zazdeshnyuk and V. Semichenko note that communication between parents and children has a number of specific features. Positive signs include:
1. Intimacy, intimacy, reduction of the “confidence interval”, the distance between communicating parties;
2. Ensuring extra-role acceptance and interaction. For example, a child at school plays the role of a student, on the street - the role of a pedestrian, in the sports section - an athlete. The family accepts him in the integration of all his external roles;
3. The complex nature of the influence of such aspects as training, education, development. By encouraging a child’s certain behavior and punishing him for violating certain rules, parents make it clear what system of norms and rules is acceptable in society. At the same time, an identification mechanism occurs simultaneously: the child imitates his parents, is guided by their opinion, this can happen both on a conscious and unconscious level;
4. Regulating the child’s various relationships with the outside world. The family should relieve stress received by the child in other areas of life (recreational function of the family);
5. Ensuring maximum duration of family ties.
At the same time, there are a number of objective reasons why communication in the family may become difficult:
1. It was found as a result of research that the range of emotional manifestations in the family can fluctuate, as it includes relaxation and decreased self-control, and an increased tendency to nervous discharges. Communication between spouses and children usually occurs in the afternoon, when they are tired and feel the need to rest.
2. Communication in the family can take place against the backdrop of an already accumulated excess of communication.
3. Communication in the family is associated with small, everyday household chores, which devalues ​​its meaningful side, since it can be limited to external effectiveness with the internal emptiness of relationships.
4. Parents do not always have the necessary psychological and pedagogical experience. It is acquired, as a rule, in parallel with the development of the child. Therefore, mistakes in upbringing are possible due to the lack of such experience. Researcher of children's neuroticism V. Garbuzov identifies several types of improper upbringing: hypersocial, anxious-suspicious, egocentric.
The hypersocial type of miseducation is the most common. They wanted to have a child not because there was a deep spiritual need for him, but because, according to the general opinion, children should be in every family. At the same time, from early childhood, the child is required to function in the “ideal option” mode - for example, eat by the clock, sleep by the clock, etc., regardless of his own needs and desires. A child with hypersocial parents is, as it were, programmed, overly disciplined, and overly hypocritical. With hypersocial upbringing, temperament is suppressed, as a result, children develop a hypersocial, or anxious-suspicious, character, which often leads to neurosis if they suffer a severe failure or collapse of their claims.
An anxious-suspicious type of improper upbringing is observed in cases where, with the birth of a child, the parents’ persistent concern for him, for his health and well-being simultaneously arises. This type of upbringing is often observed in families with only one child. In this case, the child is not independent, indecisive, vulnerable, touchy, and unsure of himself. He becomes restless due to an alarming perception of reality.
The egocentric type is observed in a family with an insufficient level of responsibility regarding the future. The child is forced to imagine himself as a super-valuable person. The slightest whims are satisfied immediately, desires are predicted, there are no restrictions of the regime, discipline, or the concept of “impossible”. He is not accustomed to understanding the interests of others, to wait for his turn, does not tolerate the slightest hardship, and aggressively perceives any obstacles. Such a child is disinhibited and unstable. As a result, the choleric person’s aggressiveness becomes sharper, his perseverance is transformed in the developing character into stubbornness, his determination into persistent demands, and so on. In a sanguine person, speed is transformed into disinhibition, wit - into talkativeness and reasoning, mobility - into fussiness; emotionality - into hysteria, confidence - into self-confidence. In a phlegmatic person, slowness degenerates into passivity, perseverance into stubbornness, and determination into rigid demands, just like in a choleric person. The main thing is that in children of all types of temperament, with egocentric upbringing, the social essence of temperament and its altruistic traits are suppressed. As a result of such upbringing, society ultimately receives an aggressive and selfish personality with elements of hysteria.
As a result of everyday interaction, a general atmosphere of intra-family relations develops, characteristic of a particular type of family. The following types of relationships are distinguished:
Cooperation is about support and mutual assistance. In a family, the basic needs of all its members are met. Everyone, regardless of age, feels important and receives help and understanding from the family.
Parity implies “allied” relations based on the receipt of common benefits that satisfy everyone through the interaction of family members. The personal significance of each person is relegated to the background; the search for the rational expediency of relationships comes to the fore.
Competition - in the family, everyone strives for leadership.
Confrontation - the desire to dominate others and show one’s superiority prevails in the family.
Antagonism is the lack of compromise in family relationships. Such relationships often develop between parents and children.
Against the background of such types of family relationships as antagonism and competition, symptoms of “hidden orphanhood” appear, emotional alienation of children from parents, loss of protective contacts between parents and children, and the consequence of this is child homelessness, vagrancy, uncontrollability of children’s actions, and inappropriate behavior. The number of childhood neuroses is growing. Neurosis that is not cured in childhood can distort a person’s fate and affect his entire future life.
Conclusion
The problems of family education are multifaceted and varied. Violation of family functions, education, suboptimal style of communication and interaction leads to constant conflicts and negative trends in the development of children.
This topic is attractive because problems associated with improper upbringing in the family, sooner or later, as the child grows up, develop from private, intra-family problems into public problems, since society consists of specific people who, for the most part, make up its “face” . The more educated, healthy, hardworking, independent people among us, the higher the potential, level of culture, etc.
Researchers V. Zazdeshnyuk and V. Semichenko offer some pedagogical recommendations that could help in family education.
1. It is necessary to determine your own concept of upbringing, that is, to substantiate the principles that parents would like to implement in the process of interaction with the child.
2. Determine the range of non-interference in the child’s affairs. This range increases as he gets older. You can make a list of actions that a child can perform without the knowledge of their parents. The child must feel that he is a legitimate participant in all family events.
3. Learn to diagnose the motives for interaction between parents and children.
4. Be able to control yourself and the situation, resist external provoking moments.
5. Be able to protect the child from external influences. For example, if it is not possible to change circumstances, then try to change your attitude towards them to make them less traumatic.
6. Constantly increase educational potential through thoughtful analysis of other people's experience.
7. Be able to analyze your own mistakes in upbringing, conflicts, as they are the cause of the formation of negative changes in the relationship between the child and parents.
All the difficulties of intrafamily relationships cannot be avoided. The process of raising a healthy and fulfilling personality is complex and difficult. But a purposeful, well-thought-out program for raising a child in a family, understanding his problems, taking into account the personal qualities of a particular little person, caring for his physical and moral health, and combining reasonable demands with love and mutual understanding in the process of education will help raise a worthy member of society with less effort than with spontaneous course of events.

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Psychological problems of moral education of children. /Sat. scientific works. - M., 1977. Family upbringing in child development………….…………..……..6 Conclusion………………………………………………………………………………….13 .. - formation of the child’s personality; identify problems family education at the present stage; to uncover...

Oksana Shportko
The importance of family education in child development

The importance of family education in child development.

Family pedagogy is a science that studies the specifics of conditions family education, which allows you to develop scientifically based recommendations for parents on personality formation baby. Family pedagogy does not prescribe how to live and what to be, but explores under what circumstances a favorable environment for child development, and in which cases difficulties will certainly arise. Upbringing in the family is carried out constantly on the example of the authority of adults and family traditions, through the life of the family through individual influence on baby. But in family education there are no clear organizational forms, such as classes or lessons. About the need to give family education of purposefulness, scientific validity, and the importance of combining knowledge and experience were spoken by the classics of domestic pedagogy. K. D. Ushinsky believed that an empty theory, based on nothing, turns out to be the same useless thing as a fact or experience, from which no thought can be derived, which is not preceded by experience and which is not followed by an idea. Theory cannot abandon reality, fact cannot abandon thought.

Family education is one of the forms education citizen in society, combining purposeful actions of adults (parents) with the influence of family life, accompanied by spontaneous influences, unconscious, uncontrollable, for example, behavior patterns, habits of adults, their daily routine and much more. Such impacts are repeated and affect child day after day.

The most important and unique thing happens in the family. educational significance socialization process baby, comprehensive knowledge of the surrounding social reality, mastering the skills of individual and collective work, introducing him to human culture. Leading factors in personality formation baby are: the moral atmosphere of family life, its way of life, style, that is, social attitudes, the family’s value system, the relationships of family members with each other and the people around them, moral ideals, family needs, family traditions. Intrafamily relationships for a child- the first example of social relations. As an important feature family education, it should be noted that that in a family setting child early included in the system of these relations. In families with strong contacts between the adult and child, with a respectful attitude towards children, the latter more actively develop such qualities as collectivism, goodwill, and independence.

Family plays a special role in raising a preschooler. This is the first environment that shapes his personality. Preschool childhood is a period of high sensitivity child to educational influences and influences of the environment. At this age, the foundation is created on which everything that follows is built. education and training. For a preschooler, the family is the social world in which he becomes involved in social life, learns the norms of human society, and learns moral values.

In family child gets an idea about family roles, he learns social behavior skills by imitating the behavior of his parents.

Psychologists believe that one of the most remarkable features of the mental makeup baby– a constant desire to have an authority in front of you, to whom you can turn at any moment for help, advice, support. Child If he can share his joys and sorrows with his parents, he gains greater balance, confidence, and psychological stability.

But the family does not always have a positive influence on children. The conflict atmosphere of the family and constant quarrels between family members have a negative impact. Teachers talk about such a paradoxical situation when "difficult" children grow up in families with good material income, relatively high culture of parents, and vice versa, in poorly wealthy families, with parents with a low level of education raising good children. It is obvious that neither material conditions nor the pedagogical knowledge of parents are able to compensate educational inferiority of the stressful tense atmosphere of the family.

The basis family education is the emotional nature of the relationship, which is expressed in the deep and bloody love of parents for children and children for parents. The attachment of a mother to her baby is especially pronounced, which is initially determined biologically, but gradually becomes more and more socially colored. meaningful feelings. A baby's love for his mother is not given to him from birth, but constant close communication with her evokes reciprocal love, which lasts for a lifetime. The child feels what care, affection, family warmth, joy and pleasure come from relatives. Indifference of parents who do not satisfy the desire child to communicate, to a joint emotionally charged and meaningful activities, leads to a delay in the socialization of the individual, that is, a slowdown in the assimilation of norms, rules, habits of social behavior, and even to the formation of antisocial behavior.

Peculiarities family education- consistency and duration educational influences on the child from parents and other adult family members.

Educational the process in the family is a phenomenon that has no beginning and end, carried out constantly, in word and deed, deed and intonation. Leading teachers and psychologists have proven that the higher the education and cultural level of parents, the more advanced methods they use in raising children. This could be a personal example, organization of joint activities, a more flexible system of rewards and punishments. An educated mother who spends time with child Although he spends less time, he organizes meaningful leisure time in the family more intensively; friendly relations are established with children. The very fact of increasing the amount of time for communication between parents and children does not give positive results, will not enrich communication in the case of spiritual unpreparedness of adults, established habits, stereotypes of relations between parents and children.

The family has objective opportunities for natural inclusion child in her household, economic activity, in joint recreation, in socially useful activities (in the yard of the house, in kindergarten, indirect inclusion child to parents' work: If child, like other family members, performs work duties, lives with the interests and concerns of the family, then he truly becomes a full member family team, gets used to respecting the work of mother and father, which contributes to instilling caring in him, responsibility, hard work. Labor upbringing children in the family has a positive impact on family relationships between parents and children. Involving child to housework, to joint activities with adults, parents encourage development collectivist orientation of his behavior among his peers.

A family is a social group of different ages, where, as a rule, 2-4 generations with different life positions live together. Family members influence each other, representing a small social group. The family is not a homogeneous, but a differentiated social group; it represents different age, gender, professional "subsystems". This allows to kid to demonstrate your emotional and intellectual capabilities as widely as possible and to realize them faster. Family education necessary for the family itself, since it enriches intra-family ties, the range of interests of the family expands, parents seem to have the opportunity to return to the past stages of their lives.

Educational the function of the family also depends on its structure, that is, the structure of the family, which acts as a unity of stable relationships between its members. A family with its order is for baby the basis for constructing the corresponding concepts is a state in miniature. Different families are distinguished by structure, for example, an incomplete family consisting of child and one adult, most often mothers; two- and three-generation families, when several generations live together

In families, two polar characters are most often observed education– authoritarian and free. Authoritarian upbringing– this is a tactic of dictatorship, rejection of even well-founded demands of children, their needs, interests, non-recognition of rights baby for independence. Such parents abuse restrictions and demand unquestioning obedience. An example is the typical reaction of parents to fair insistence baby: “Shut up! Do as you are told! Leave me alone!” etc. In such conditions, children, especially boys, grow up either aggressive or weak-willed. Frequent prohibitions negatively affect the psyche of children.

Parents who adhere to the principle of free education, think that the child should develop without restrictions, responsibilities. In conditions of permissiveness, a person may be formed who cannot restrain his desires or take into account the rights and interests of other people. Many parents think that problems with children happen "all of a sudden", but this "all of a sudden" prepared and conditioned by a number of circumstances that they did not notice.

Parents who respect the individual baby, take into account his opinion, needs, interests, strive to understand the meaning of his actions, to look at the situation through his eyes. V. A. Sukhomlinsky wrote about his firm conviction that there are qualities of the soul, without which a person cannot become real teacher, and among these qualities in first place is the ability to penetrate into the spiritual world baby. He saw the misfortune of many teachers in the fact that they forget: a student is, first of all, a living person who has entered the world of human relationships. These thoughts of the famous teacher also apply to parents.

Family researchers have identified a number of reasons that influence performance. family education. To them relate:

– lack of a program for parents education, spontaneous character raising and educating a child, fragmentary pedagogical knowledge, lack of understanding of age characteristics, needs baby, the idea of ​​a preschooler as a smaller copy of adults; misunderstanding of the role of assessment in raising and educating a child, the desire to evaluate behavior and activities baby, and his personality;

– monotony and lack of substance in activities child in the family, lack of communication between adults and children;

- inability to give to kid objective characteristics, analyze your methods education.

Often in education children make mistakes that are associated with parents’ misconceptions about education, as well as the influence on children of the entire way of life of the family, the personal example of adults. The most typical mistakes of parents have been identified, for example the child is being deceived in order to achieve obedience from him, they apply physical punishment to him, do not comply with the consistency in the requirements, harshness towards to kid combined with connivance.

The need to provide families with pedagogical assistance is discussed in a number of works (E. P. Arnautova, L. V. Zagik, O. L. Zvereva, T. A. Markova, etc., which emphasize the importance of taking into account the specific conditions family education, the focus of this assistance on the formation in parents of pedagogical knowledge and the ability to use the latter effectively. During development of society education process children is becoming increasingly longer and more complex. This is due to the influence of many factors, the main ones being the complication of social life itself and the lengthening of the childhood period. Family in its educational activities began to increasingly need help - both from society and from teachers.

LESGAFT PETER FRANTSEVICH (1837-1909), teacher, doctor, public figure. Russia.
He graduated from the Medical-Surgical Academy in St. Petersburg (1861), first worked there, and from 1868 he headed the department at Kazan University. LESGAFT - a democratic teacher, protested against the arbitrariness of tsarism in education, did a lot for the development of women's education in Russia, advocated freedom of science and the rights of scientists. For his public activities he was subjected to repression: his public lectures were prohibited, in 1871 he was dismissed from the professorship of Kazan University, later expelled from St. Petersburg, and was under police surveillance for decades. In 1893, LESGAFT organized a biological laboratory and the first “Courses for teachers and leaders of physical education” in Russia, which trained many female teachers (“lesgaftichek”). In 1905 he opened the Higher Free School with courses for workers.
LESGAFT became a recognized author scientific system of physical education. He defined the most important principle of physical education - its unity with the mental, moral, and aesthetic. It is necessary to develop in a person the ability to control his body, which is achieved according to LESGAFT, natural movements. This name means that these movements correspond to the characteristics of each muscle group and cause actions of all muscle groups of the body (natural conformity): running, gymnastic exercises without overexertion, etc. Movements that are contraindicated by the nature of a particular muscle group are excluded. It is important that all physical movements are not imitative, but conscious. LESGAFT assigned a special role to outdoor games in the system of natural movements. He valued them for their versatility, since they include physical exercises for various muscle groups, they form character, and promote moral and mental development.
The theory is also interesting family education, proposed by LESGAFT. She is full of love and respect for the child. True care for him requires studying his mental and physical characteristics.
LESGAFT talentedly filled the gaps in domestic pedagogy related to issues of physical and family education. Ushinsky's prediction that a serious development of the theory of physical development could be done by a scientist - a doctor and a teacher - was also justified. LESGAFT gained the respect of his contemporaries for his selfless social activities in the field of education. His name is still revered today, and his works are widely used in the training of athletes and physical education specialists.

Family education of a child and its significance
Introduction

The most essential requirement that must be presented to an educator and teacher who takes on the responsibility of guiding a child entering school is that he understands the child, his mental functioning, as well as his individual properties, since, without knowing the conditions of the child’s mental development, The teacher can be perplexed every minute by the manifestation of one or another character trait of the pupil, will not be able to find the main reason for this act and will lose sight of the close connection of the child’s individual characteristics with his preschool environment and family discipline.
It is no less necessary for each educator to be clearly aware of all the requirements that are placed on the child within the walls of the school, and to strictly monitor the influence that the school order has on the child. Quite often we have to observe that both parents in the family and educators at school influence the child, completely unaware of why exactly one or another educational measures should be applied to him; But such unconscious guidance of a child’s personality never passes without serious consequences and sometimes reverberates throughout his entire subsequent life.
Most educators, in case of failure of their pedagogical measures, willingly blame everything on the notorious “heredity”, on the “innate depravity” of the child. nature or, to console themselves and others, they refer to some elusive influences that supposedly cannot be foreseen or avoided.
Having become accustomed in everyday life to very hasty conclusions when it is necessary to indicate the reason for this or that action of an adult, they usually limit themselves to only accusations and censures also when they ask: where to look for the reasons for bad habits or immoral actions of a child who has barely reached school age?
However, these accusations and censures do not clarify anything at all, but only prove that the teacher does not want to take the trouble to find out those mental motives that form the basis of every human action. Due to lack of attention, and most importantly due to ignorance, they usually rush to admit the existence congenital evil inclinations, they eloquently talk about “incorrigibly spoiled” children, as if this corruption appeared on its own and the child himself was responsible for it! The influence of adult leadership somehow always remains in the shadows; and they don’t want to believe that the “depravity” of a child of school or preschool age is the result of the education system, for which one pupil still pays. In the vast majority of cases, it is not the innate stupidity (moral or mental) of the child, but pedagogical errors that prepare the child for a bitter future, leaving indelible traces of moral corruption and mental impotence on his personal manifestations and habits.
Who doesn’t know that the whole point of education (both in the family and at school) often comes down to the fact that the child needs learn, Moreover, the word “teach” often means: exact, punish, threaten etc. It cannot be otherwise as long as they act completely blindly, according to routine, without realizing each step; If you don’t “know yourself,” and don’t learn to connect cause with effect, then routine pedagogical techniques of a coercive nature will continue to reign within the walls of the school, as well as in family life.
This study presents the main types of children who have to be observed when they appear at school, and, if possible, the connection that exists between the observed typical manifestations and the conditions under which children develop in the family is clarified. The results of the observations presented are still very incomplete, and if they are presented in the form of an anthropological sketch, it is only in order to provoke further observations and checks and, thus, by common efforts to clarify the development and significance of the types encountered in school and in the family. (...)

School types (Anthropological study)

Lesgaft P.F. Selected pedagogical works.- M., 1988. - S. 18-19, 24-114,137-138.

THE IMPORTANCE OF FAMILY RELATIONS IN THE EDUCATION OF A CHILD

The pedagogical truth is eternal: how important family relationships are in education. For the family to become a pedagogically effective factor in education, children need to see and feel mutual parental love and respect. Children sensitively and unmistakably notice the absence of normal relationships between parents. In this case, they have to constantly take one side or the other. And this cannot but traumatize their psyche, their character. Parents' quarrels and their indifference to their children inevitably cause them to feel lonely.

A child alone in his feelings and thoughts, alone among the people closest to him, among his parents - what could be more tragic for a small child! A child without communication with one of the parents, and sometimes with both, is an unnatural state of his being.

You cannot expect positive results in raising children when there are family troubles. All parents know this. But knowing the truth does not mean following the truth. To follow the path of truth, one needs deep and stable pedagogical convictions and a firm desire for their practical implementation. And this requires parents to have a sense of duty and responsibility to their children and society for the fate of their children, and a certain pedagogical culture. But this is not enough. After all, raising children is an extremely difficult task, requiring knowledge, skill, character, time, effort and energy.

The child receives his first impressions in the family. They are constant, ordinary, the family acts unnoticed, “strengthens or poisons the human spirit, like the air we breathe.” The social development of the child takes place in the family; family impressions often serve as the only source of feelings and thoughts at the age when the child is most susceptible; impressions remain for life. It is in the family, under the influence of parents, their behavior, their relationships, that a child learns to love one thing and hate another, to be indifferent to a third, gets used to work or idleness, learns the first lessons of morality, concepts of good and evil, and finally, the skills and habits of one or another are formed. other behavior. It is in the family that the foundations for the subsequent formation of interests, sympathies, and relationships are laid; The intellectual and emotional sphere of the personality, its abilities and character are intensively developing.

Understanding the importance of family, especially initial education in the formation of personality does not yet ensure its pedagogical effectiveness. The pedagogical culture of parents is necessary. Its most important requirement is to prevent arbitrariness and excessive guardianship when raising children, to show respect for them, not forgetting about their human dignity.

Pedagogical culture includes a culture of communication, without which the moral development of personality is impossible. It is necessary to intelligently organize the life of the family, the life and activities of children, to involve them as equal members of the family in active participation in everyday life. This is the surest way to establish moral ties. Let children know that everything that surrounds them, that they have, is all created by the labor of parents and adults, that they, children, to the best of their ability and ability, are participants in the creation of material values. Only under this condition will the baby take care of toys, books, personal belongings, bread, and the nature around us.

The positive example of parents and elders is the most important means of moral education of children. A common pedagogical truth. “Educating,” wrote psychologist Ostrogorsky, “does not mean saying good words to children, instructing and edifying them, but, above all, living like a human being yourself. Whoever wants to fulfill his duty towards his children, to leave behind them a good memory that would serve as a testament to posterity on how to live, must begin his education from himself.”

You can tell by a child's face when parents are angry or in conflict. A small child does not understand why parents fight. But the atmosphere of tension, discontent and quarrel is transmitted to young children, causing them anxiety.

If the color of eyes, hair, and the shape of the nose are inherited, then “facial expression is something that is brought up in the family,” says Masaru Ibuka. What it is like: joyful, gloomy, tense, nervous, calm - the result of the relationship between parents and children. Dr. Shinichi Suzuki recommended that parents and educators look at the faces of their children when they come home. You will see and read in them the entire history of your marital relationship. And from this point of view, the best development is achieved by a child in whose home there is a favorable psychological atmosphere.

Everything that is in a child - both good and bad - comes from the parents, from the relationship with them.

Although a significant part of parents will not agree with this, because many believe that the good comes from them, and the bad came from somewhere on the street, from a kindergarten, school, from another parent, grandmother, grandfather, etc.

If there is constant nervousness in the family due to the fact that the mother is eccentric, very impressionable and irritable, we can say that this nervousness infects the children. And if the mother has a gloomy and taciturn character, then most likely the child will also be gloomy.

Any irritability has its origin, and the task of parents is not to suppress it, but to eliminate the cause. If parents scold the child only because he is irritated and angry, ignoring the cause of these experiences, then it is clear that the child will be even more nervous. It is necessary to understand what is happening, and for this you definitely need to explain to him, and only then show and tell something.

Parents should never forget that their children have their own rights. Their main legal right is to be children. Hence the responsibility of parents: not to deprive their children of what is most precious to them - childhood. This simple formula contains all the difficulty of its practical implementation. Adult children are a certification of our parental activity, which embodies our reasonable love for them and our pedagogical professionalism, our family happiness.

FAMILY LIFE OF A CHILD

The family life of a child occupies the first seven years after his birth. This department in a child’s life can be divided into the following periods: 1) First year after birth before end of the first year; at this time, the child moves from a lying position to a sitting position, and then stands up and begins to walk on his own; from the seventh month he begins to have teeth, he begins to distinguish those around him, and at the end of this period he begins to pronounce the first articulated sounds, that is, he begins to separate what acts on him from the outside. 2) From end of first year before the beginning of the third year; During this period, all baby teeth come out, the child moves freely and clearly articulates the sounds of his speech. He distinguishes himself from the environment and calls himself in the first person “I”, i.e. he begins compare sensations separated by him. 3) From the beginning of the third year before end of fifth year the child repeats everything; he himself notices, repeats, names and inquires about the correctness and meaning of the words he pronounces, that is, he assimilates the conventionality of the sensations that appear to him and connects them with the words of his speech. 4) From fifth before end of the seventh year At this time, the child observes, repeats, reasons, that is, he tries to use reasoning to figure out for himself the meaning of the actions and phenomena he observes, as well as the relationship between people. During the family period of a child’s life, his type is formed, he learns the customs and habits of a given area and family, and therefore this period has a great influence on a person’s life and leaves an almost indelible mark on his entire future existence. The purpose of education is to promote the development of a person distinguished by his wisdom, independence, artistic productivity and love. It must be remembered that the child cannot make a man but this is the only way promote and not interfere with him so that he can develop a person within himself. It is necessary that he develop an ideological person and strive in life to be guided by this ideal.

The main reasons which must be adhered to when raising a child during his family life: 1) purity, 2) subsequence in relation to word and deed when dealing with a child, 3) absence of arbitrariness in the actions of the teacher or conditionality these actions and 4) recognition of the child's identity constant treatment of him as a person, and full recognition of his right to personal integrity.

The purpose of any education is to promote the development of an intelligent person who would be able to connect the experience of past life with present life and be able to foresee the consequences of his actions and relationships towards another person, clarify for himself the causal relationship of the phenomena he observes and creatively predict and manifest himself in what This is what human wisdom is expressed. It is clear that such manifestations can only occur when a person is able to develop his own thought and apply it himself. It is also necessary that these manifestations, like all human actions in general, be so expedient and quick, and at the same time simple and accurate, that they make it possible to increase the productivity of a person and bring it to artistic grace.

The wisdom of a man should prove to him the narrowness of private life, and point out the significance of public manifestation, in order to suggest to him his duty to contribute to the improvement of the society in which he finds himself; in the same way, his ideology should contribute to the ability to idealize society, his neighbor, and even the business in which a person is busy, and thereby show his love, since true love certainly requires the idealization of what it relates to. Therefore, wisdom and love, as exclusively human manifestations and possible only with education, should constitute the main goal of education.

However, certain conditions are necessary to achieve this goal. A great degree of energy is required in the manifestation of the being; such living energy is possible, however, only under favorable conditions of conception and fetal life, as well as family life, which would support such energy and in no case lower or weaken it.

1. Purity required as a necessary condition for proper nutrition, and also as a necessary means for protection against any infection. It has already been said earlier about the cleanliness of the mother’s body during pregnancy and its effect on the metabolism and nutrition of the body. Uncleanliness of the breasts and nipples can already cause thrush (Soor) in the child, just as uncleanliness of the genitals, especially during childbirth, can cause inflammation of the eyes of the newborn (ophthalmia neonatorum), which is the cause of blindness in one third of all blind people.

The skin of a newborn is thin, soft, red due to the thinness of the layer covering the blood vessels; it is covered with lubricant (vernix caseosa), consisting of tire elements, fat and fluff. On the 4th or 5th day, and no later than 2 weeks, the surface of the skin begins to peel off; At the same time, fluff falls out on the entire surface of the skin, as well as hair on the head. All this indicates how important such a delicate, thin and large surface, which is relatively larger in a newborn than in an adult, is for metabolism and nutrition. Frequent discharge of urine, as well as the contents of the intestinal canal, the formation of deeper inguinal folds, as well as popliteal and axillary cavities - all this requires the greatest possible purity and removal of decay products. Otherwise, this impurity irritates the skin and causes itching and various skin diseases, which greatly disturb the baby and prevent him from sleeping and restoring the great losses that occur in him during sleep. In the room where the baby is located, under no circumstances should dirty linen be kept, everything around should be clean and white, there should not even be a stain anywhere, and under no circumstances should one allow that specific smell that one can usually tell from a distance. recognize the presence of the nursery.

All the so-called infectious diseases of children, such as measles, scarlet fever, whooping cough, smallpox, diphtheria, etc., are only a consequence of untidiness and would be completely unthinkable with absolute cleanliness. When a child dies from such an illness, the blame certainly falls on those around him, who, while mourning the child, are actually mourning their own uncleanliness.

The high mortality rate of children in the family period always occurs most where loose morals and untidiness are most developed (...)

2. The absence of arbitrariness in the actions of the teacher or the conditionality of his actions is an essential requirement in raising a person. During family life, a child forms his own habits and customs by repeating the actions of those around him. What the child himself is exposed to at this time will certainly be reflected later in his actions towards others. Any voluntary action has the character of an accident and is carried out under the influence of feeling and therefore is usually harsh and even rude. In order to act with greater consciousness, it is necessary to discuss and clarify what is noticed, bringing, if possible, into a causal relationship the demand posed and what caused it.

They usually say that a child must obey and obey; he will reason later. Here, however, the following psychological situation matters: Depending on how we learn to act for the first time, we will act in the same way later. Just as everything learned is learned only through exercise, so the ability to reason is also learned only gradually. Without reasoning, abstract thinking is impossible, and without abstract thinking, human volition is impossible. Therefore, it is necessary to teach a child to reason during the family period of his life. During visits to city schools in Leipzig, I attended the lesson of one young teacher; he constantly hit his students, first in the face, then anywhere with a small cane, which he had prepared for this purpose. When I met this teacher in the evening and asked him whether he found corporal punishment useful and even possible in school, he firmly answered that it could be done well without it. When I asked why he used them, he answered frankly: “It’s more likely.” This speed, however, is usually associated with arbitrariness, with a random rude action that does not correspond to the reason that caused it, v therefore often completely unfair and insulting to the child’s personality. On the contrary, it is necessary to accustom the child to be aware of his actions, to constantly think about what he is doing, and to constantly monitor and clarify for himself the basis of his actions; only in this case he is able to develop the human being within himself. This requires corresponding actions on the part of others.

It is necessary to distinguish the child’s desire to find out the question that he has from simple talkativeness and his constant questions, which he himself is already able to resolve; Such talkativeness of a child is very unprofitable; it will not be reasoning over phenomena noticed by the child himself, but only random pronunciation of words and an uninformed and even superficial attitude to the matter. Such talkativeness should never be encouraged in a child. The reason for this phenomenon is usually the empty chatter of adults and the inability to handle and speak with a child. In an active and working environment, where everyone is constantly busy and the child is busy, there is no time for idle chatter. Only when the person closest to the child is released from work does he turn to him to clarify his doubts and receive a short and simple answer. Accordingly, the child poses his own questions, which he initially thinks about himself, and then turns to others to check or clarify them. You just shouldn’t push the child away, chase him around in vain and treat him randomly, on the spur of the moment, sometimes very affectionately, sometimes harshly, completely arbitrarily, as necessary, never finding out the basis for his actions. In the latter case, of course, the child will also repeat what he perceived and will never learn to reason about what he is doing and what he is doing.

3. Subsequence in relation to words and deeds when dealing with a child, it is a very significant requirement in his family upbringing. It must be remembered that a child is born only with a certain degree of body energy. The organs of active activity are only outlined and are far from developed; they must gradually develop as they are excited to work. The child's manifestations are initially exclusively imitative; at the same time, through his questions, he learns the conventional meaning of the sounds he pronounces, as well as the conventionality of the sensations that he has and through which he learns to distinguish between the influence of the external world on him and what is happening in his own body. From these, the child develops ideas, by separating and comparing which he already develops a criterion for his actions. If a child notices that adults have no consistency, then he is not able to internalize this criterion, his actions will be random, shaky, and will not be guided and directed by any serious reason. If a child is told about something as if it has already been done, but in reality he sees that this is not so, that it has not been done, then he assumes that one can say one thing and do something else that does not correspond to the word. If, in the presence of a child, we demand that the visitor be told that we are not at home, he will initially look in amazement and immediately express his doubts. The statement that it is not his business, so that he remains silent and does not reason, does not explain the matter to him, he is only confused and believes that he can act as he has to or as he wants. Under such conditions, the child does not assimilate the criterion of truth, he has no basis for its moral manifestations, he will be guided only by his feeling, what is pleasant to him, he will do, what is unpleasant - he will avoid, i.e. he will be guided by what what motivates every animal. The child will thus be confused about the foundations of human moral manifestations.

Truthfulness is not given to a person ready-made; it must be acquired and assimilated initially only by observing the lives of others, just like the speech of a child. You can talk to a child, adapting and repeating those incorrect and poorly articulated sounds that he pronounces, then he will not learn to speak correctly for a long time, and even some irregularities in pronunciation may remain with him for the rest of his life. All this forces the adult to be very consistent in all his actions, which the child constantly monitors, learns and acts accordingly. The truthfulness of a child consists only of the truthfulness of the environment surrounding him, or, at least, of the person to whom the child is most attached and who relates to him most easily. Should you just push your child away if he speaks out? phenomena noticed by him, and not pay his attention to the consistency in the actions that he notices, so that he begins to tell lies, which will easily become a habit for him, which he will not soon get rid of. It must be firmly remembered that the child mainly affects the matter, not a word; he is so real that everything he does is influenced by the actions he sees. Repeating what he actually notices around himself, he develops his habits and customs from this; under the influence of this his type is formed. All this indicates how essential the consistency and truthfulness of the adults in whose environment he lives during the family period of his life is for the child.

4. Recognition of a child's identity with the very beginning of his conscious life is also very important, and usually too little attention is paid to this during education. Usually, parents believe that the child is their property, their property, with which they can act completely unaccountably, as with a thing. Only in that case are they inclined to recognize the young man’s personal integrity when he is able to live by his labor. But such an attitude towards a child is completely wrong and nothing like this can be allowed, since only parents are obliged to promote human development. This obligation stems from their past, they at one time used the same, therefore they give only their moral duty to their offspring. The more educated a person is, the more he controls himself, the more lovingly he will treat the child, idealizing him as a person. The recognition of his personality and his inviolability is certainly associated with the image of a person, but again a person becomes accustomed to this only in his youth; how he was treated and what attitude he saw towards others, so he will treat others. With education, the attitude towards people undoubtedly becomes more attentive, but the greatest trace is still left by what is learned during the family period of the child’s development. You need to see a child who has never been insulted or touched personally to be convinced of how sensitive he is to people and how closely he takes every insult inflicted. Such a child is always very impressionable and more capable of education. This is completely understandable: he was always treated with full attention, he did not know any insults and oppression associated with them, he retained such an energy that he must be very impressionable to everything that influences or excites him, he is therefore very observant , and through observation he easily gains life experience.

Usually, according to accepted custom, a child is looked at as a doll that exists for the amusement of adults. As soon as the baby is born, the midwife pats his buttocks to make him sigh deeply; it is tightened with a swaddling wrap so that adults can wear it comfortably; they sit him down and carry him in their arms because it amuses the adults; they kiss him, and the adults irritate themselves; in a word, they perform a series of actions with the baby that are comforting or convenient for adults and, undoubtedly, harmful to the baby. All this should not be done and cannot be allowed to happen without harm to the child. There is no need to cause an increase in respiratory movements in a newborn with a blow; he will already move under the influence of the new environment into which he has appeared, and will also make respiratory movements; if these movements are not strong enough, then there are enough measures to excite him to increased activity without these usual blows of the midwife. You should not pull a child, carry him, sit him down or rock him, it does not bring anything other than harm to the child; all this hinders its development (constriction), irritates and disturbs it (carrying it) and accustoms it to an additional stimulus (rocking), without which the child then screams. The mother needs the child to sit up sooner, so that his teeth emerge sooner, so that he stands faster, walks faster; In addition to all this, he is artificially aroused and supported by artificial measures. Such acceleration violates the gradualness and consistency in the child’s development, which alone can be accepted as normal. Violation of this gradualness leads to illness and even death. Instead of a child myself learned to sit when he is able to maintain a sitting position, myself learned to crawl, stand up, walk, he is forced to do all this before he is able to do it himself, but when adults want it. He must be left lying there, not touched or dragged, until he does this himself. It is necessary that the baby myself complicated his actions. to the best of our ability. Froebel's gardeners force the child to even imitate and thereby deprive him of every opportunity to do everything himself.

The whole secret of family education is to give the child the opportunity to develop himself, to do everything on his own; adults should not run around and do nothing for their personal facilities And pleasure, and always treat the child, from the first day of his birth, as a person, with full recognition of his personality and the inviolability of this personality<...>