How to deal with the first wedding night. Sex on the wedding night: ancient customs and modern traditions around the world

The first wedding night is a pleasant, but exciting event. Compliance with easy rules will make this night unforgettable and deprive you of any unpleasant sensations.

Try to relax before an exciting event. Left alone with your husband, drink some wine or champagne, eat a light snack. Alcohol will help you relax, but don't overdo it or it will backfire. Chocolate and seafood are natural aphrodisiacs that increase arousal. Buy assorted chocolates, order sushi or a salad with seafood - aphrodisiacs will also help you relax and liberate yourself. To create a romantic atmosphere, light scented candles, turn on quiet music, or take a bath together. Ask your husband not to rush, let him wait until you are ready. If you are very worried, discuss it with your future husband before the wedding. Tell him about your fears, ask questions of interest. A loving husband will reassure and tell you what you need to do.

It is better to spend your wedding night in a romantic setting, for example, in a hotel room, where they can bring you champagne and snacks.

Tell your husband comfortable positions

There are several positions in which defloration occurs most painlessly. The most popular position is the classic missionary. Here you can relax and give the initiative to your husband. Control his actions, and defloration will be quite easy. For more relaxation, place a pillow under your buttocks and pull your bent legs to your chest. Another good position suitable for a virgin is the “man from behind”. Lie on your stomach on the bed with your feet flat on the floor. Let the husband rest his hands on the bed and enter you while standing. In this position, the hymen is stretched, and its rupture is easy. During sex, it is better not to experiment, the positions of the rider, sitting and standing are not for you yet. If during sex there is pain and bleeding, it is better to stop contact. Blood is released in most cases, but sometimes it may not be. With severe bleeding, you should refrain from sexual intercourse for several days.

If the bleeding does not go away for more than 3 days, you should consult a doctor.

How to behave after sex

After sexual intercourse, you may be tired or, conversely, feel excited. But do not forget to pay attention to your husband. He was as worried as you were that something would go wrong. Thank him for his care, give free rein to kisses and hugs. We can take a shower together. Be sure to tell what you liked about your husband's actions, and only then you can give some critical remarks. Note what you would like next time.

How to spend your first wedding night

Since ancient times, we honor the traditions of the first wedding night. Let in modern society marriage night for many, it is only a convention, since for the bride and groom it is not at all the first. However, this night should be special.

First marriage night although it has lost its traditional meaning, it is still a symbol of new life for spouses. This is the first night as married people, and it must pass in a special way. This is the start of your new life night should serve as the foundation of your marital relationship.
The wedding ceremony and celebrations on this occasion are extremely exhausting for both spouses. Therefore, by the end of the holiday, there is a desire to fall asleep as soon as possible, because there is simply no strength left for something more. It is desirable to have a marriage night in a good hotel. It is in an unfamiliar environment.
In a hotel or hotel, book a wedding room. Your room will be decorated in a special way. A large and soft bed will be strewn with rose petals, silk linens will spice up this night. Make sure that no one even accidentally violates your privacy. Make love or not this night- it's up to you to decide. In the morning you will wake up for the first time as a married couple.

How to relax without alcohol

Spend the evening with a bottle of beer, and on holidays not limit yourself to one bottle, and maybe even take something stronger on your chest - this habit exists among many. Some even cannot understand at all whether it is really possible to relax without resorting to the use of alcoholic beverages. However, they do not think that alcohol just does not allow the body to rest, but on the contrary, exhausts it even more.
Listen to yourself: why can't you relax without drinking? Maybe it's just a psychological addiction. When drinking with friends, you feel more relaxed and it seems to you that you are resting both in body and soul. And it is quite possible that the dependence is no longer only psychological and it is time to take drastic measures.
If you're determined to eliminate alcohol or significantly reduce the amount of alcohol in your life, think about how else you can relax. After all, you usually drink with friends in a bar, a nightclub or even in a park on a bench. Change your circle of interests and places of visits.
Go to museums, theaters, exhibitions. In such cultural places alcohol no, and you will feel that even without it you can spend time interestingly and with benefit for self-education. By the way, about education - start going to courses of what you have long dreamed of learning. Playing the guitar, learning a foreign language. If this is your long-standing desire, you will not get tired of such work.
Get active in sports. Volleyball, basketball, football, whatever. Sports activities not only cheer up and give a positive charge to the whole body, but also improve the appearance. Get involved in social activities.
An important role is played by communication with animals. Furry friends are great for relieving stress. Get out in nature more often. Watching her calms and fills the body with energy.
If you choose the right way to spend your free time, you will be pleasantly surprised that even without alcohol you don't feel worse. On the contrary, your body will begin to truly relax, thanks to sports, the body will tighten up, and the new acquired knowledge may help you achieve those goals that you could not even dream of sitting on the couch with a bottle of beer.

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How is the first wedding night

Initially, the first wedding night was really the first in the life of the newlyweds. Girls kept their innocence for one single person - her husband. In modern society, the first night is considered just a beautiful ritual.

Decide in advance on the place for the wedding night. It could be a honeymoon suite in a hotel or your apartment, which you move into after your wedding. If you have been living together for a long time, you can, of course, arrange a wedding night at home, but it is unlikely that you will be able to create the right atmosphere.
Take care of decorating the room. Tie heart-shaped balloons, arrange candles, prepare rose petals. Don't forget to stock up on light snacks. In the process, you will probably get hungry, and the remnants of the banquet, carefully packed by your parents, will be out of place. Buy fruits, berries, chocolate, cheese. Put a bottle of champagne in the refrigerator.
The first wedding night is a beautiful end to the wedding day. It is very important that it takes place in a romantic atmosphere of love. Therefore, igniting the celebration, be sure to leave the strength to continue the holiday tête-à-tête with your spouse.
Make your bed with fresh linens ahead of time. It is good if it is washed with a conditioner that will give a light fragrance. Turn off your phones and make time for each other. Many newlyweds, having reached the place of the first night, begin to count the donated money. Do not get carried away with this and immediately start planning expenses. Calculate the amount and save until tomorrow.
Let the newly-made husband free his beloved from the shackles of the wedding dress corset. Girls should take care of wedding underwear in advance. It can be a thinner corset or a set. It is beautiful when the bride's underwear is made in white and decorated with lace.
In order to relieve fatigue after an emotional day, you can take a bath with your spouse. Stored rose petals, candles and champagne will come in handy here. Turn on beautiful music, put wine glasses and fruits on the table next to the bathroom and relax while sharing your wedding impressions.
A pleasant surprise for the young spouse will be a private dance performed by his wife. You can learn it from videos on the Internet, and practice it in advance at home. It's not scary if the movements are not honed. The main thing here is to surprise.
The first wedding night is a time of affection, tenderness, romance. Imagine that this is your first experience, kiss and hug more, take time for foreplay. Listen to your partner's desires during intercourse. And during breaks, feed each other fruits and sweets, clink glasses and rejoice, because you are now a family.

In order not to waste time and not look for containers for donated flowers in the middle of the night, stock up on a couple of plastic buckets.

If you spend the night in an apartment or house, take care of breakfast in the morning in advance. Good for toast, scrambled eggs, fruit, wedding cake leftovers.

What is the first wedding night

Previously, the first wedding night involved the first sexual contact of the newlyweds. In the modern world, this expression has a slightly different meaning. However, this does not prevent the newlyweds from looking forward to their wedding night.

With the wedding night, many peoples are sometimes associated with very strange customs. In some African tribes, the innocence of the bride was considered a disgrace. And the blood that appears during the deprivation of virginity could bring illness to her husband. Therefore, girls were deprived of innocence with a special bone knife or just a finger. In other tribes, everyone took turns taking possession of the bride. And only after that the "experienced" wife could go to bed with her husband. Fortunately, to date, such rituals have been preserved only in a few wild tribes.
In most cultures, the bride's virginity was highly valued. In Muslim countries, the tradition is still preserved, according to which, after the wedding night, the groom must provide evidence of the bride's innocence. Blood-stained sheets are hung out for all to see.
In seemingly civilized Europe, there was a "right of the first night." And it did not belong to the groom. The girls had to spend their first wedding night in the beds of feudal lords. This applied to a greater extent to serfs, brides from noble families could avoid such a “privilege”. This barbaric custom existed in some countries until the 18th century. But in Germany, France and Scotland, another funny tradition has been preserved since ancient times. Friends of the bride and groom do their best to prevent the newlyweds from being alone. They make noise under the windows, sing obscene songs, they can hide a dozen alarm clocks in the bedroom. The newlyweds manage to enjoy each other only after the guests get tired and fall asleep.
In Russian traditions, the wedding night was given great importance. The bride and groom were forbidden to drink strong drinks during the wedding feast. The bed for the newlyweds was made in a cold non-residential area. The newlyweds were escorted there by friends and matchmakers. The bride removed the boots from the groom. This custom was not intended to humiliate the young. In one boot, the groom hid gold and silver coins. If the newlywed guessed where the money was, she got the right not to maintain the family budget. In pre-Christian Rus', the virginity of the bride was a desirable phenomenon, but not mandatory.
For modern couples leaving the registry office, the concept of "wedding night" is very arbitrary. The innocent bride is the exception rather than the rule. Most newlyweds enter into an intimate relationship before the official registration of marriage, and this does not shock anyone. Some couples even manage to have a baby before marriage. However, all this should not detract from the solemnity of the first night in marriage. On the contrary, the wedding night gives the couple an opportunity to return to a time when they were just discovering the joys of sex with each other. It is better to postpone the revision of gifts until the morning and do what the wedding night is intended for - love.

How to relax before sex

Intimate relationships are an integral part of the life of many modern couples. For some, sex becomes a way to get to know yourself and your partner better, to feel trust and become closer not only physically, but also emotionally. However, only those who are absolutely relaxed can be completely liberated in bed.

You will need

- beautiful underwear;
- feather, puff or tassel;
– massage oil/cream;
- Beautiful music

Instruction

A liberated person will be able to get maximum pleasure from intimacy. With such a girl, the partner will feel cozy and comfortable, and will try his best to please her. To fully surrender to the process, you need to relax before sex.
Your favorite music and beautiful underwear will help you get in the right mood. Just get dressed, listen to a few tracks, meditate or, on the contrary, actively move around. This will help you forget about problems, get unnecessary thoughts out of your head. If your partner knows about your excitement, you can conduct a “relaxation act” together.
A long foreplay will also help to relax before sex. Show your partner your erogenous zones, gently stimulating his sensitive areas as well. Pay special attention to the head, neck, ears and the area behind them. If you want to extend the time of sexual games, first use flirting by touching your loved one with accessories: puff, feather or soft brush. Gradually move on to closer contact.
Prolonged tactile contact will help to imbue trust in a partner. Ask your man to give you a light back massage. To make the touch more pleasant, use oil or cream. There are many nerve endings in the region of the back, shoulder girdle, and lower back. Their massaging will respond with pleasant sensations, help you relax and tune in to intimacy. Some girls are very excited about this foreplay. Especially if the partner, in addition to hands, uses lips and tongue.
If you are only at the very beginning of a relationship and you will have sex for the first time, try to “postpone” it until the morning, and spend the night in a confidential conversation and sleep together. Sexologists claim that the time spent together will help you emotionally bond with your partner and feel relaxed in his presence. Therefore, morning sex will be a logical and pleasant start to a new day (and a strong relationship).

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A man can also be very nervous before sex. Therefore, a long prelude will become for him the same "lifeline" as it is for you. The main thing is not to be embarrassed by your fears and try to overcome tightness and tension with joint efforts.

Some relaxation sources recommend drinking a glass of champagne or wine. However, remember: this method is a sure way to rash acts that you may regret. Such relaxation can also negatively affect your health.

What to do on your wedding night

Basically, all brides think about the wedding: the dress, the ceremonial hall, the toastmaster and other moments of this day are worked out to the smallest detail. But some people forget about another important question - what to do on their wedding night? When husband and wife are left alone in a new official status.

You will need

- rose petals;
- aroma candles;
- silk bed linen;
- Beautiful underwear.

Instruction

Don't come home, make this night unforgettable. Book in advance a room in a good hotel, with a large bed and a beautiful view from the window. It is best to choose a honeymoon suite. This will help you get rid of pressing problems, relax and enjoy your wedding night.
If you do not have the opportunity or desire to spend your wedding night in a hotel, you can go home. But make sure that there is no one at home, only you and your spouse. To create a romantic atmosphere, you need to take care of auxiliary items in advance. Rose petals on the bed, scented candles around, subdued lights and silk linens. Light snacks and cream can be prepared to use during foreplay.
It is desirable for a girl to purchase beautiful underwear, a negligee to impress her husband. After a long day, makeup can get dirty and rice can get stuck in your hair, so it's worth going to the bathroom and cleaning yourself up. Do not take off your wedding dress yourself, let your husband do it.
When you get rid of the uncomfortable dress, you can move on to the main thing. No need to rush, because you have the whole night ahead of you. Play some romantic music in the background to create the right atmosphere. Tune in to the right mood by taking a bubble bath together. After it, you can give each other a relaxing massage, smoothly turning into foreplay.
If you are intimate for the first time on your wedding night, you must carefully deflorate. Place a folded towel under you to keep your bedding from getting bloody. Do not worry and try to relax so that the process is not so painful. There are two positions that will allow you to do this quickly and without unnecessary pain.

First: you lie on your back with a small pillow under your buttocks, knees bent and pulled up to your chest. In this position, the hymen is stretched and quickly torn, so that the pain is of a short-term nature. For the second position, you need to lie across the bed and lower your legs to the floor. Your spouse takes a position between the thighs and enters from this position. The defloration process is fast and you will not feel much pain.

After that, it is recommended to wait with sex until the wound heals a little. So you can end the wedding night with kisses and mutual caresses. If you do not want to go to bed after this, think in advance what to do on your wedding night later.

Despite the fact that now the first wedding night has become almost a formal concept, every bride dreams of spending it in accordance with all the rules, so that later she will remember it with pleasure, and not with laughter or a mournful expression on her face.

And couples who get married hope that the first wedding night will become something sacred for them, different from the usual sex. And for this it is worth observing traditions and listening to signs that have been around for many centuries - our ancestors were wise people, so why not take their experience into service.

Traditions of the first wedding night

Tradition one. Eat and drink in moderation

Traditionally, at a wedding, a separate table is prepared for the newlyweds with a minimum of alcoholic drinks and only light snacks. And this is not done in order to show that from now on the whole life of the spouses will be associated with hardships and abstinences. The newlyweds are not supposed to drink and eat hearty at the wedding precisely so that the first wedding night passes without a hitch, and even so that the baby conceived that night is not flawed in the head. Therefore, if you want your wedding night not to resemble a well-fed and drunk dream, limit yourself to a couple of glasses of champagne and do not abuse roast geese, piglets and sturgeons.

Although it is not good to go to the marriage bed on an empty stomach. There were cases when tired newlyweds first passed out, remaining in silence and in the company of a soft bed, and then met at the refrigerator, as "caring" relatives and toastmasters did not allow them to renew their strength. To prevent this from happening, arrange for a special table to be prepared for you and your betrothed - light meat, preferably chicken (by the way, chicken is traditionally served to newlyweds so that they have a strong family, plentiful and healthy offspring; they eat it without the use of knives and forks) , and also ask for snacks to include aphrodisiac foods - celery, seafood, avocados, caviar, pine nuts and bananas. By definition, these are not heavy and tasty products, quite suitable for a wedding feast. You and your husband will not remain hungry and will feel a surge of love energy.

Tradition two. Don't sleep!

No matter how tired you are, no matter how many nights you spend with your lover before the wedding, in order for family life to be happy, the act of entering a man into a woman, as a symbol of entering her life, must take place. By the way, in many countries it is still believed that only physical intimacy makes the bonds of official marriage legal. Therefore, shift all the worries of organizing a wedding to relatives, friends and toastmasters. Your job is to smile, kiss while shouting "Bitter!" and try to save strength for the wedding night.

Do not drag out the holiday, you will have time to have fun from the heart on the second day of the wedding. And on the day of the wedding, give guests the opportunity to have fun without you, quietly slipping away to a secluded place at no more than nine in the evening, so that you have the opportunity to take a shower or a joint bath, drink champagne, resting from a noisy celebration, and devote the night only to each other.

Tradition three. Privacy of newlyweds and secrecy

In the old days, the newlyweds were escorted to the marriage bed by relatives and the most honored guests, who sang indecent ditties of an intimate nature, shouted, scaring away evil spirits and evil spirits, made greasy jokes and tried in every possible way to set the newlyweds for the upcoming act. Nowadays, such an accompaniment looks at least ridiculous, therefore, the more imperceptibly you disappear from the holiday, the more chances you will have to spend the night according to a pre-planned scenario.

According to tradition, the groom's mother or his godmother makes the bed for the newlyweds. Sometimes, if for some reason this is not feasible, the role of bedkeeper is played by another married relative. In principle, if you do not want someone to touch your bed of love, you can organize everything yourself the day before, now this is not forbidden. Most importantly, do not tell anyone where you will spend your wedding night, this will serve as a kind of amulet. Only the woman who will make your bed can know about this place, and you. Let the rest remain in the dark. So no one will have the opportunity to interfere with you at the most crucial moment.
By the way, that is why it is best to spend the first wedding night where no one else will spend the night except you and your husband. If you do not have your own apartment, then it is better to rent a hotel room. Against the background of general wedding expenses, this is not such a large amount (it is better to refuse a multi-meter wedding Hammer, and spend the night with dignity), but the attendants will do everything for you and at the highest level.

Just agree in advance that there are candles and flowers, bring an aroma lamp with the oil, the aroma of which will unobtrusively excite you both, and do not forget the tray with champagne, fruit and chocolate. Although this is usually not necessary to remind the staff.

Tradition four. amulet

Also, bring a beautiful peignoir and underwear there in advance so that there is something to change into before the wedding night. In the old days, a special shirt was sewn and decorated for the newlywed, she, like bed linen for the first night, was part of the bride's dowry, and all sorts of protective signs were embroidered on it. It is necessary to change clothes before the night - on a wedding dress, as well as on underwear, the negative energy of all sorts of wedding "hysterics" and just envious girlfriends who do not yet have a couple can remain.
For the same reason, you should not bring flowers from the wedding presented by guests to the room where the wedding night will take place. The exception is the bouquet presented by the groom, but only if he chose (bought) it himself, and if you did not launch it (with a bouquet, not the groom) into the crowd of the afflicted. By the way, some newlyweds leave the bride's bouquet for themselves, and throw a similar one, bought specifically for this purpose, to the guests. It is believed that the longer the bride's bouquet stays in the bedroom of the newlyweds, the longer and happier family life will be. Therefore, many brides tend to order a bouquet in a special capsule with a solution so that the flowers do not wither during the wedding.

Tradition five. Holy water, chicken and egg

Still, observing wedding traditions, the marriage bed and in general the whole room must be consecrated. To do this, go through the corners with holy water, sprinkle them and the bed and cross it all three times. Or entrust it to the mother-in-law. But only if you are sure that she is sincerely happy with the choice of her son. Otherwise, it is better not to take risks and consecrate everything yourself. You never know what she will think about, fulfilling the mission entrusted to her.

So that the first wedding night is successful, and the offspring pleases with health, drag a piece of chicken from the wedding feast and put it under the bed. By the way, some families still observe the old custom of putting an egg in bed or under the bed. Only not fresh, but either boiled, or generally wooden or bone. It is believed that after this simple ceremony, family life will be smooth, and the children born in this marriage will be healthy and obedient. So, if such an egg is thrown to you, do not throw it away, let it lie down for three nights (if you spent the first night in a hotel, take it with you), and then leave the egg, if it was artificial, leave it as a family heirloom, and if it was boiled, then feed it to the pigeons.

Tradition six. Demonstration of innocence

Another tradition that was sacredly observed by our ancestors is the demonstration of a sheet with blood stains as proof that the bride went to the groom untouched. Moreover, even if the blood after defloration did not go due to the characteristics of the body, the groom's relatives and the groom himself had every right to refuse the "dishonored" bride. In our time, such a tradition is an atavism. And it is mentioned in this article only by the way. However, if you are a fan of the “traditions of the deep antiquity” and wrote the wedding script based on historical sources, you can demonstrate a sheet with impromptu signs of defloration on the second day of the wedding in order to observe the authenticity of the old Russian wedding ceremony.

You can talk endlessly about the traditions of the wedding night, but the most important thing is for you to determine for yourself what is important for you - to spend an unforgettable night of love, get enough sleep after the wedding hassle, or to the point of keeping all the traditions. And so, in accordance with your own desire, plan the wedding evening and the night after it.

Signs of the first wedding night

And finally - a few signs that also came to us from our ancestors.

No one should enter the newlyweds' bedroom.
If earth, sand or, even worse, needles are found on the marriage bed, spend the night elsewhere. This sign is worth listening to especially. Firstly, such an "act of vandalism" may be the result of damage. And secondly, it is simply uncomfortable and unpleasant to sleep on the ground and needles. And, by the way, the first sign exists, among other things, so that no one will throw anything extra into your bed.
If you have prepared a marriage bed for yourself in an apartment where someone else will spend the night, in no case do not allow a drunken uncle who has come from another city to lie down on this bed, or a witness who is not able to reach home. It is believed that in this case, the spouses will cheat on each other.
Before the wedding night, a young wife takes off her husband's shoes, who has a coin hidden in one shoe. If the wife is the first to take off her shoe with a coin, then she will dominate the family. But along with the status of “head of the family”, the wife also receives the honorable duty to take off her husband’s shoes every day. Do you need it?
Pillows on the marriage bed should be laid "cut" on the pillowcases to each other. It is believed that this promises a long, friendly and happy family life.

Keeping the traditions and following the signs, do not forget to bring something of your own on the wedding night. After all, only you know how to please and please your beloved man so that this night becomes truly unforgettable and magical, and so that you can proudly say that your wedding was a 200% success.

Preparing for a wedding is the most exciting event for a girl. There are so many things to choose, think over and prepare that your head is spinning. Restaurant, dress, hairstyle, bouquet, guests - all this occupies your thoughts from morning to evening. You, for sure, have already flipped through dozens of thematic magazines and studied no less Internet sites, but have you lost sight of another important moment of the upcoming event? How about the first wedding night? Are you ready to make it special and unforgettable, as it should be for newlyweds? We hope our tips will help you with this.

What to do on your wedding night

Decide where exactly the merge of your loving souls and bodies will take place. Perhaps it will be a chic honeymoon suite in a hotel where the staff will take care of everything, or perhaps after the celebration you will return to your own apartment, where there should be an appropriate atmosphere that needs to be thought out. Turn your bedroom into a love nest, where there will be no place for bad moods or strangers. This night should be just for the two of you, so everything is in your hands.

· It is clear that both newly-made spouses can't wait to unpack the gifts and count the money donated for the wedding, but this activity is definitely not for the wedding night. Do not spoil the romantic mood with materialistic moments. Save your zeal for sexual pleasures and enjoyment of each other, and not gifts from relatives and friends.

· You can create a romantic atmosphere without the notorious rose petals and candles. Of course, if it pleases you, then decorate your bedroom as you like, but first of all, take care of the sexy underwear in which your husband will see you on this special night.

· An equally important item in planning the first wedding night should be the menu. At your discretion, choose drinks, cool them in advance. And as snacks, it is better to prefer seafood, because they are the best aphrodisiacs.

· You can relax after a busy day and relieve stress by taking a bath together. Candles, music, foam and aromatic oils are up to you.

· The first wedding night is the best time to remove the old prohibitions in sex and experiment with images and roles. Show your imagination, try on various erotic images and think over the scenario of an intimate game. This will make your sex especially memorable.

We live in the modern age, when the first wedding night of newlyweds is almost always a convention. Many young people even before the wedding enter into an intimate relationship or even manage to live together for a while. But this is not a reason to neglect the special moment that symbolizes the transition to a new level of your relationship. Approach this with all responsibility and enthusiasm and discover the joy of sexual intimacy for yourself in a new way.

The wedding night is the traditional end of the wedding ceremony. This event should take place in a relaxed romantic atmosphere. Lovers are looking forward to this moment of tenderness, love and affection.

For each nation, the first night of the newlyweds is different. For example, in some African tribes, the innocence of a girl is considered a shame, so brides are deprived of her in childhood. But in virginity is valued quite highly.

Wedding Night: Traditions of the World

Each religion differs from all others in its unique perception of a person's personal and social life. This includes marriage traditions.

The most exciting moment of the wedding is the anticipation of the wedding night by the newlyweds. During it, they will be able to know each other as spouses. This ritual is shrouded in many customs and traditions fixed in the minds of believers.

As for Christianity, this religion has built a whole system of sacred dogmas that affect marriage. In Rus', most people were quite loyal to the immorality of some girls. However, chastity has always been highly valued in society.

This idea is also present in the modern Christian world. To this day, the Christian religion has such a tradition: immediately after the end of the festive celebration and the feast, the newlyweds are sent to the groom's house. The next day, the young family should receive guests.

Orthodoxy does not force the observance of ancient customs associated with the wedding night of lovers. However, much attention is paid to preparing the place where the newly minted husband and wife will spend their long-awaited night together.

The bed for the newlyweds should be laid by: the matchmaker, the groom's mother and sisters. As a rule, bridesmaids are not allowed, as they can envy the happiness of the newlyweds. Bed linen must be new and ironed.

After the bed for the bride and groom is prepared, it must be sprinkled with holy water and crossed. You need to put in the room. They should not be removed or covered with sheets - in marriage, marital intimacy is not considered a sin.

The Orthodox Church recognizes only legal and. Priests say that only after the wedding, the newlyweds will know the sacrament of marital intimacy. That is why the ceremony of concluding a church marriage is carried out immediately after the official registration of the relationship.

Sex outside of spiritual marriage for believing Christians is considered a sin. The first intimacy must necessarily occur only after the wedding in the temple.

Sexual contact between spouses is not possible on the wedding night if the bride has her period on the day of the wedding or wedding.

During such periods, the girl's body is considered unclean. The fair sex should first calculate whether the day of an official or church marriage falls on “critical days”.

During this time period, women are strictly forbidden to attend church. Left alone with her lover, the wife, like a real Christian, should be humble. She needs to take off her husband's shoes and ask permission to share the marriage bed with him.

On this blessed night, the newlyweds should be especially affectionate and tender with each other. As for, then there are their own wedding traditions. Nikah is a union between a woman and a man in Islamic family law.

The very last stage of this ceremony is the first night of the newlyweds. Among Muslims, it occurs only when the newly-made wife arrives at her husband's house.

The main part of the bride's dowry is a lot of pillows and blankets. Without high-quality bed linen and a comfortable mattress, a wedding night is impossible. Lighting should be weak or non-existent.. This is necessary so that the husband and wife are not embarrassed by each other.

In many Asian countries, it is customary to brightly decorate the bedroom where the bride and groom will spend their wedding night. This will have a positive effect on the mood of the spouses. The abundance of flowers speaks of the beginning of a rich and secure life together.

Newlyweds should be relaxed, and also strive for mutual pleasure from sexual intercourse.

Where to spend?

There are several options for where to spend the first wedding night:

in your apartment. This is not the most original idea, but reliable. This allows you to decorate the bedroom with romantic attributes in advance. A familiar environment will help you quickly relax and recharge with positive;
in parental home. This is a perfectly acceptable option. Especially if the father and mother have nowhere to send for the night. There is one nuance here: you will have to forget about loud manifestations of feelings and behave quite modestly;
in a country house. A wedding night in a calm and secluded place is a real dream. But, under the only condition: if there is a shower in the country house. Personal hygiene at such a moment should not be forgotten. In the house you can completely relax and enjoy a pleasant solitude with your soulmate. It is quite possible that it will be possible to diversify sexual games in the fresh air, in the gazebo, near the river or on the grass;
in the hotel room. This is currently the most popular option. Comfortable conditions, beautiful interior, new furnishings, excellent service and one significant disadvantage - the high cost. In this case, you will need to vacate the room before noon the next day. Despite this, the wedding night happens only once in a lifetime and you can afford such a luxury. At the hotel, you can not only enjoy all the delights of intimacy with your loved one, but also sit in a restaurant or cafe for small talk.

How to decorate a room?

The bedroom of the newlyweds, like the banquet hall, is usually decorated with fresh flowers and balloons. Beautiful plants can be used to create unique artistic compositions.

They are placed everywhere: on the floor, window sills, cabinets. The main condition is that flowers should not interfere with movement around the room. It is better not to use plants with a pronounced aroma, as they will interfere with the process.

In the bedroom, paintings with images of flowers or romantic scenes are allowed. On the bedside tables you can put figurines of doves and angels. For centuries, bedding has been part of a bride's dowry.

Pillows and blankets were decorated with various embroideries and symbolic patterns. Today, such handmade linen is almost impossible to find. If you follow modern rules, then it is better to cover the bed of the newlyweds with snow-white, pale pink or beige bedding. As for the decor, it can be anything: the presence of lace, ruffles, bows, stones, rhinestones is welcome.

Passionate couples in love prefer bedding in rich red, burgundy or black.

Signs

Traditionally, at a wedding, a separate modest table is prepared for the newlyweds with a minimum amount of alcohol and food. Hearty food and alcoholic drinks are not required for the wedding night to go smoothly.

For a married life to be happy, the first intercourse must take place. No matter how tired the newlyweds are, they need to make an act of love.

Until now, in many countries it is believed that only intimacy makes the bonds of official marriage legal. You need to try to save strength for intimacy.

If the couple does not want any of the guests to touch their bed, then it is better to do the preparations yourself. The main thing is not to tell anyone where the husband and wife will spend their wedding night. In this case, silence will serve as a kind of amulet. So no one will have the opportunity to interfere at the most crucial moment.

First you need to take care of choosing the right underwear. Let it be a spectacular peignoir or sexy underwear. It is imperative to change clothes, because on wedding dresses, as well as on underwear, there remains the negative energy of some envious guests.

Lingerie should be seductive - lacy and light. It is better if it is white, milky, peach, pink or cream. These are gentle tones that will allow you to remember the first wedding night for the rest of your life.

Why is the first year of marriage the hardest?

The first year in a legal marriage is the most difficult. The main problem, oddly enough, is the very fact of creating a new family. The stress that every person experiences when entering into a legal marriage is stronger than when parting.

Anxiety can be caused by both negative emotions and positive ones. Living together with another person means giving up some habits, leading a new lifestyle, and.

How to get through all the difficulties together?

Today, women take an active position in society. They fight for equal rights with men. A similar situation can be traced within the family. The wife, just like the husband, earns money. In this regard, there are many difficulties regarding the distribution of responsibilities.

The finale of any wedding celebration is the wedding night. Nowadays, the first night of the newlyweds has become a convention that has no value. Now it is considered the norm when newlyweds have sex far before the wedding.

But once the wedding night was accompanied by a whole ritual, different for every nation. We offer a look at the pages of history and remember the customs of the wedding night.

HOW WAS THE FIRST WEDDING NIGHT IN EUROPE

In the Middle Ages, there was a tradition in European countries according to which the bride had to spend the night not with her husband, but with the feudal lord. Historians give different arguments about the emergence of such a custom. Some argued that the deprivation of virginity is a dangerous procedure, subject only to deities, and the feudal lord took full responsibility for what was happening and protected the spouses from the wrath of the gods.

Others complained about the satisfaction of their sexual needs and the desire to be above everyone else, because the feudal lord could easily refuse ugly brides, and this rule was always followed with beautiful girls. True, at the end of the 16th century, such a custom was abandoned in Switzerland, and in Germany it was replaced with a ransom.

SEX ON THE FIRST WEDDING NIGHT IN AFRICA

In some tribes of Africa, on the wedding night, it was customary to knock out the girl's two front teeth. It symbolized marriage - something like a wedding ring. Married women were not ashamed of their toothless smile and showed it to everyone, while unmarried women covered their mouths.

In Samoa, the first wedding night had to pass in the circle of sleeping relatives of the bride. Only newlyweds should make love silently so that no one wakes up. Otherwise, a serious scolding from relatives awaited the man. That is why many Samoan men lubricate their bodies with oil before their wedding night: it is easier to break free and the beatings are not so painful.

Sex on the wedding night in North Africa involved intercourse between the bride and guests at the wedding. Each guest had to give the bride a special gift.

There were tribes in which it was customary to deprive girls of virginity at a very young age - before the onset of menstruation. It had to be done by a complete stranger. Most often it turned out to be a traveler passing through the village. If at the time of the onset of menstruation a girl remained a virgin, this was considered a real shame, she could never get married.

In the Bakhtu tribe, which is located in Central Africa, instead of having sex on their wedding night, the newlyweds had to fight until dawn, and then disperse to their parents' houses and sleep off. A strange custom, of course, but every nation has its own cockroaches in the head. The next night, the newlyweds fought again. And so it continued until they pour out all the hatred on each other for years to come. Sometimes these fights ended in death.

Some African peoples had a tradition to carry out the act of defloration with the help of special tools. Such a mini-operation was carried out by the oldest women.

Sometimes this procedure was replaced with a natural one, but it was not the husband who had to deflower the girl, but the father or elder brother of the groom, as well as the priest or elder.

In the Arunto tribe, the friends of the future husband had to deprive the girl of her virginity. The man chose two or three friends, they kidnapped the bride and each of them had sex with her. When a girl loses her innocence, anyone could come to her house in the flesh until the wedding itself and have sex with her in order to take a sample from a newly-made woman.

HOW THE FIRST WEDDING NIGHT HAPPENS TO THE MUSLIM

The first wedding night for Muslims has not changed much since ancient times. Most Muslims still have the custom to show the groom's relatives the sheet on which the newlyweds had sex. Blood stains testified to the innocence of the bride, if they were not there, the girl was considered vicious, it was a shame for the whole family. Currently, this rule is observed only in some regions.

Before the wedding night, Muslims must observe a number of customs:

The first wedding night for Muslims takes place only after the bride transports all the necessary things to her husband's house. Dowry for a girl begins to be collected from an early age, she must have at least 40 blankets and pillows. Bedding must be decorated and hand-sewn (some items may not be purchased)
Before proceeding with intimacy, a man should put his hand on his wife’s head, praise her, say a few kind words and end the speech with the phrase “In the Name of Allah.” Then, the newlyweds read two ritual prayers, after which the man reads another prayer, in which he asks to bless Allah for a life together and, in case of divorce, help them maintain friendly relations.
A man must give his wife a lot of sweets and delicious drinks. Honey and milk were considered obligatory products on the table. The husband should be soft and gentle when communicating with his wife, win her over, talk. Indecent sexual relations are prohibited by the Quran. A woman should not push a man away, because this could lead to sad consequences. Also, the newly-made wife should not be indifferent and cold.
In the morning, after the wedding night, the spouses perform a ritual of washing and start eating. Often they set the table and invite relatives.

HOW THE FIRST WEDDING NIGHT IS GOING ON FOR THE CHECHEN

For Chechens, the first wedding night takes place on the third day of the wedding. To perform the ritual, the man put on a special suit, which was previously presented to him by the bride's relatives. At this time, the woman should be ready in the bedroom, where her married friends bring her.

Before intimacy, a man should open the Koran and pray to Allah, then close the book with a thick cloth and proceed to deprive his wife of innocence. If the spouses did not know each other before the wedding, sexual intercourse is not a prerequisite on the wedding night, they must first get to know each other.

There should be no one in the room where the newlyweds sleep, not even animals.

THE FIRST WEDDING NIGHT OF THE MUSLIMS IN DAGESTAN

For Dagestanis, the first wedding night is held in a special way: it is turned into a rite of martial arts. A man will be worthy of a woman only if he wins. The bride is being prepared for a duel since childhood, and on the wedding night they shaved their heads, lubricated exposed skin with grease, put on clothes with many knots, pulled overalls with a cord that should preserve virginity.

Nobody was allowed to enter the room where the battle took place, it was only possible to eavesdrop and peep. According to ancient customs, the guy was obliged to defeat the girl, and the fight continued until the victory.

If the fight went on for too long, the bride was persuaded to surrender, they specifically did not let her drink and eat, but they did everything for the groom.

The faster a man unties all the knots in his overalls, the faster he can take possession of his wife. The battle took place without weapons, and it was not forbidden to inflict bodily harm.

HOW THE FIRST WEDDING NIGHT GOES WITH GYPSIES

Gypsies, of course, are not the purest nation, but they have been observing their traditions from time immemorial. The first wedding night among the gypsies is called the "Takeaway of honor" and is considered the most important ceremony at the wedding. The bride must keep her virginity before marriage, otherwise, she will dishonor her family. The newlyweds, along with three respected ladies from both families, go to a separate room where they check the bride's innocence.

The sex of the newlyweds takes place without witnesses, but the groom is obliged to take out the veil with traces of virgin blood.

According to another version, three ladies deprive the girl of innocence, with the help of a sheet wound around her finger, so that the newlyweds could not falsify the virginity of the bride. There is another version of the first wedding night among the gypsies - the bride and groom must have the first sexual intercourse on the banquet table in the presence of guests. When the girl's innocence is proved, the ladies put a sheet with traces on a tray, shower it with red ribbons and take it out to the guests. Red ribbons are distributed to the groom's relatives for a fee. After the ceremony, the bride is dressed in a red dress, her braids are braided and the veil is removed.

FIRST WEDDING NIGHT IN Rus'

In the times of Ancient Rus', premarital relations were not forbidden - it was a widespread phenomenon. Some young people managed to live with each other and get married, and sometimes they had children. In some settlements, a "trial marriage" was common, in our civil. Young people lived together, shared life, gave birth to their first child, and only then they could get married, if they didn’t change their minds.

Some traditions of Rus' were similar to barbarian ones. At the wedding, every man could touch and grope the bride the way it should have happened during the wedding night. The bride could even be stripped down to her undershirt at the wedding to show off all the juice. When the wedding was coming to an end, the young people retired to a separate room, and the guests eavesdropped and peeped under the door so that the newlyweds were busy with each other, and not with sleep.

Sex was supposed to last until the morning, which was facilitated by the guests - they yelled ditties with sexual overtones and spurred the young in every possible way. In the morning, the bride and groom provided evidence of the deprivation of innocence. If the groom did not succeed, he could repeat the attempt two more times, if even then he did not cope with his duty, the groom was replaced by a more experienced man. In some villages, it was customary to spend the wedding night with the groom's older brothers, who came to the aid of the inexperienced groom in case of emergency.

As we can see, the wedding night in many countries involved the deprivation of a girl's virginity, if the girl was vicious before the wedding, her family was disgraced, and the negligent bride could be returned to her parents. True, now any gynecologist will say that during the first sexual intercourse there may not be blood, just like pain, since the hymen is different for everyone.