What to do and how to behave if your husband stopped loving you: advice from an experienced family psychologist. If a man fell out of love: how to understand and what to do
My husband and I have been married for 12 years. We got married when we were 20 years old, soon a son appeared. For the first years, my husband was seething with youth, he drank, spent time with friends, did not appreciate his family, I got used to it, then I got used to it, dissolved in my son, and the thought of divorce repeatedly visited me. Feelings for him cooled down and it became easier, I fell in love with myself, time passed and he looked at me with different eyes. He began to be jealous of me, began to feel his attention, began to show love. He changed after 6-7 years of marriage, took a closer look at him, realized that it was not in vain that she saved her family at one time, that this is the person with whom I want to live, whom I love. As for sex, in this regard, I was always desirable for him, throughout all these years he was the initiator in sex, I was cold towards him in this regard, although I felt that I loved him, I thought that something was wrong with me in physical terms. But she made no attempt to remedy the situation. Very often, my coldness became the cause of our scandals, misunderstandings, resentment. Over time, he got used to me like that, and this question was no longer as acute as before, but sometimes it still arose. At the moment, in the 12th year of family life (my husband is 33 years old), we are expecting a second child - a girl, as we both wanted. This child is desirable. I felt that my husband began to move away from me somewhere in the 4-5th month of pregnancy. He began to focus on himself, on his health, nutrition, on how he looks, began to play sports intensively, began to rapidly grow up the career ladder. Was looking great. In short, he lived his own life. I began to suspect him, to be jealous. In addition, he changed the password in the social. network, password-protected his mobile phone, although before we did not hide anything from each other. I see that he is hiding something from me, he has become a stranger. Many times called for a frank conversation. I made contact, the conversations were very difficult emotionally. He says that he himself does not know what is happening to him, to my question whether he loves me or not, he says “I don’t know”, “I don’t know anything”, “don’t worry, I will never leave you.” To my questions, about the fact that someone may have appeared with him, he is either silent or brushes it off. This has been going on for 4 months, I have to give birth in three weeks. I think that if it were not for my pregnancy, he would have left. He says: “You are now in a vulnerable position, and I am an egoist and think only of myself.” He also does not have a relationship with his son, but he says that he is really looking forward to our daughter. Returning to the question of our sex life, we must add that after the first frank conversation, I took all possible attempts to change, took the initiative in sex, became more attentive to him, in general, I almost began to look into his mouth. Our first frank conversation, as if the world turned upside down for me. I realized that I did not want to lose him, that I wanted to save my family at all costs, to return his love. And these metamorphoses happened to me almost on the same day. I have changed dramatically. At first he did not believe in my changes, he thought that it would not last long. Four months have passed, I'm still obsessed with him, I don't notice anything around, constant mood swings. And now he says that it would be better if I didn’t change, everything turned upside down in his head from this, he admitted that he was not sexually attracted to me, attributing everything to my drastic changes. But I can't understand him.. why? After all, he always expected initiative, passion from me, here, please, passion flared up in me with its former strength, but he no longer needs it. Says "return everything as it was and do not pay attention to me." Easy to say but hard to do. And he also asked me to let him go, he wants to live alone, to understand himself. I said I wouldn't hold him. But he cannot decide on this, most likely due to the fact that relatives can recognize and condemn him. In general, I tend to think that the fact is that he still had love. I don’t know what to do, it’s very hard mentally, I can’t think about my baby, all my thoughts are only about this impasse. Is it possible to bring passion and love back into a relationship? Or is this the end. The problem is that, as we had before, I don’t want to. Are we really going to love each other in turn, or is the circle complete?
What to do if the husband fell out of love? Each married couple during a certain period of cohabitation undergoes crisis stages in relations. As a result, it is recommended to first deal with the content of male coldness and detachment, to understand whether the spouse really fell out of love or the family was on the eve of the next critical period of the relationship. In addition, indifference and indifference in relationships can occur as a result of the natural attenuation of passion, from the fact that life is disgusted, tormented by problems associated with the professional. In order not to make a fatal miscalculation, a fatal mistake worth a relationship, or not to cross the Rubicon and the point of no return, one should try to bring the faithful to a frank dialogue, which must be erected not on mutually directed reproaches and insults that develop into confrontation, but on a respectful dialogue, in which each spouse has the right to speak frankly. And if, in fact, it becomes clear that the partner has really fallen out of love, then there is no need to breed dampness and hysteria, it would be optimal to give yourself a timeout in order to provide time to analyze the situation, analyze your own feelings and find acceptable solutions.
It is not uncommon for couples to experience a period of cooling after several years of living together. Relationships cease to be full of bright positive emotions, and spouses spend more and more time apart. And even when they build or create something together, they still feel detached.
The reason for such alienation will not necessarily be the disappearance of love on the part of the faithful. Often this is due to a loss of interest. In this case, the task of a smart woman who wants to save her family is to find the source of the problem and eradicate it.
If the behavior of the spouse is constantly cold, if he lives a life separate from the family, is not interested in the affairs of his wife, then most likely, love has left his heart.
What to do if a husband stopped loving his wife, how to behave, how to survive such a difficult period for a woman? Similar questions torment all the ladies who find themselves in similar situations. First of all, you should not turn a blind eye to what is happening and think that this is just a difficult period that will self-destruct over time. But you shouldn't go on the attack right away either. If a woman began to notice that her husband was becoming colder in relations with her, then it is recommended to observe the further behavior of her husband and the development of the situation. But if the problem drags on, if there is not a single attempt on the part of the faithful to return the old relationship or save the marriage, then this is an excellent reason to think about whether this man is really needed, is he worth the spent nerve cells and shed tears?
What to do if the husband stopped loving, but does not leave? First you need to identify the symptoms of "dislike". After all, the term “fall out of love” is a rather extensible and relative concept. Sometimes, it may seem that love has passed, but in reality it may not be noticeable under a pile of negative emotions accumulated over the years of married life. Therefore, psychologists identify a number of signs that signal problems in relationships:
- the spouse has ceased to treat his wife with former trepidation, and when the spouse reaches out to him, he turns away;
- ceased to betray the importance of joint dinners, breakfasts or lunches. Many people discount the importance of family meals for gender relations. In appearance, a joint dinner is such a trifle, but a joint meal actually brings spouses very close. Ignoring such a significant component of a strong relationship demonstrates the subconscious unwillingness of the faithful to be close to his wife;
- the spouse often refuses to jointly discuss their work problems, minor troubles that arise in interaction with colleagues or comrades. This means that he does not want to allow his wife into his personal zone;
- began to find fault with his wife even for no reason, believes that she does everything for a weak C grade, but does not notice her successes and efforts;
- stopped calling first and calling back when a missed call from his wife;
- in intimacy, the initiative on the part of the faithful also disappeared, and all attempts by a woman to interest her husband in an intimate way are doomed to failure in advance;
- he increasingly began to use the pronouns "I and mine", while earlier he constantly used - "we, ours";
- the spouse practically does not care what happens to her wife, what worries her, her well-being, problems and joys.
So, after re-reading the listed symptoms and finding all or several of them in their own family relationships, the woman again faces the question: what to do if the husband stopped loving his wife? To begin with, it is recommended to deal with the reasons for the departure of feelings. In each individual marriage, the reasons are purely individual, but several common points can be distinguished. Husbands, mostly, cool down to their own spouses due to a lack of emotional intimacy. Basically, misunderstanding in family relationships arises from the inability of spouses to openly talk about problems, sincerely express feelings, express feelings, empathize, etc. As a result, partners cannot correct the “bad” in the relationship, that is, what they do not like in the relationship. The result is a snowball of problems that threatens to destroy the marriage.
What to do if the husband stopped loving, but does not leave? First of all, you don't have to sit with your hands clasped, waiting for a miracle. The sooner a woman begins her religious procession to revive faded feelings, the more chances there are to save family relationships.
Among the reasons due to which men lose the feeling of love for the faithful, there are:
- retribution for past sins (for example, a spouse was seen in treason, dishonored her husband in front of persons significant to him, or treats her husband badly, etc.);
- there was no love at all - the man confused passion, admiration, falling in love with love;
- the appearance of a mistress;
- the disappearance of interest and not only intimate (the husband read the whole book and he became bored).
After analyzing the reasons that led to the fading of feelings, a woman has the opportunity to outline a strategy for reviving past relationships. First of all, you should take care of your own appearance, change your image, diversify your wardrobe, buy seductive underwear. You need to try to interest your husband in yourself, so that he takes a fresh look at the once beloved.
What to do if the husband stopped loving and wants to leave? It is necessary to part with it with dignity. If a man wants to leave, then he should be released without tantrums and exhausting scandals. Why humiliate yourself, shed tears if a person has stopped loving? It happens. It's painful, embarrassing, but not fatal. You need to properly treat the break with your loved one. Parting is the end of family relationships, but any stage of life is also its beginning. And who knows, maybe it will be much more entertaining than the previous one?! A new stage, like a virgin-white sheet of paper, on which you can draw your whole subsequent life, the way the artist himself wants to see it, without embellishing it with the wishes of his spouse. The free time can be spent on self-education, on hobbies, children, travel, new novels.
There are a huge number of problems leading to coldness and insipidity in the relationship of spouses. The first place among such problems is occupied by domestic ones. Often, all quarrels in a couple arise due to the inability to competently establish a life, unwillingness to agree and give in. Everyday worries and responsibilities kill the romance and mystery of the relationship that took place at the stage of candy-bouquet courtship. A man gradually begins to be more and more pissed off by the appearance of his wife, consisting of the same hair curlers on his head, a washed-out dressing gown, and a disgruntled face. As a result, he is increasingly beginning to be captivated by the appearance of strangers met on the street. And it's natural. Young girls walk the streets of their native city in high heels with their chins proudly raised in short skirts. They have a smile on their faces, and a hairstyle on their heads. They are not burdened with the burden of domestic problems. They are happy. Every day, faced with such beauty, it is increasingly difficult for men to look at their own wives. And this is natural. For the sons of Adam love with their eyes.
Another common problem is female “self-sacrifice”. Most young ladies, having received the coveted ring on the right finger and hearing the long-awaited “yes” at the registry office, devote themselves entirely to caring for the family, thereby making a fatal mistake. For some reason, girls, having earned the status of a married lady, abandon their studies and hobbies, forget their friends, cease to develop and be interested in what is happening outside the apartment, and begin to exist exclusively in the life of their spouse. As a result, every year they lose more and more interest on the part of the only and beloved. He just misses the company of such a young lady. Boredom is the most powerful destructive factor in family relationships.
Husband says he has fallen out of love, what should I do? How to turn the situation in your favor? So, before launching a large-scale operation called "the revival of feelings", it is recommended to spend time thinking about the need for this particular man for a woman. Why waste energy and emotions on a man who directly told his wife that he did not need her?! Of course, most likely, there is a bit of female guilt in cooling the spouse, but such behavior does not paint a man either. God rewarded men with the ability to talk not only to discuss football with friends over a glass of beer, but to communicate and, first of all, to communicate with the family. After all, most problems can be avoided by discussing them. And cooling in relationships can be prevented by explaining to your spouse about your own expectations from marriage and from her in particular.
So, what to do if the husband has fallen out of love and wants to leave? Everything is simple. It is necessary to wish him a fair wind and a happy journey. You can even help him pack his things so that he does not linger. Why would a woman who still has a lot of interesting things ahead of her spend efforts on returning someone who runs away at the slightest problem, and when difficulties arise, shifts their decision onto the fragile shoulders of his wife. After all, it is easier to leave than to try to revive feelings.
If, after analyzing the situation, the woman nevertheless decides to return the love of the faithful, then it is recommended to follow the tips below.
Husband says he has fallen out of love, what should I do? You need to completely transform, update your wardrobe, change your image and inner mood. It is recommended to add a touch of intimacy to the appearance and emphasize femininity. It’s not bad to go somewhere with friends to unwind in order to demonstrate a new image to surrounding men. A bit of admiration in their eyes will give confidence, appease vanity and increase self-esteem. A woman cannot exist without compliments and male admiration. She will simply wither like a plant without water if she does not feed her vanity with exquisite praises from the strong half.
The spouse will definitely pay attention to all the changes that have taken place with his missus. Notice and appreciate. In addition, the transformation of his wife will make him think a lot.
What to do if the husband stopped loving and left? Do not despair, calm down and give unspent love to yourself. You should not belittle him to stay, rush after him, constantly call. You need to respect yourself. The husband is an adult who has made a decision. And it doesn't matter if it's correct or not. It is not for the spouse to evaluate its correctness. Life will gradually put everything in the right place. If a man realizes that he made a mistake, he will return. But he will return due to the fact that he realizes how good he really was with his wife. A man will never live where he feels bad, and he will not return to where he does not want to. Out of pity, he will also not be able to live with a woman. Men are not inclined to self-sacrifice. Therefore, desperate attempts, coupled with tantrums, will only cause unfortunate pity for the spouse, and not at all the desire to be with her.
So, what to do if the husband stopped loving and left? There are two ways out: return the faithful or allow yourself to be happy without him. It is better to make a decision in a balanced state and in a good mood. It is required to understand that returning a spouse does not mean humiliating yourself in front of him and asking. You just need to be transformed both externally and in soul so that his only desire is to satisfy all the whims of his newly beloved wife. To follow the second option, you must first fall out of love with your spouse. To this end, it is recommended to try to find positive aspects in the current situation. For example, to calculate how much time will appear to meet their own needs.
What should be done to make a husband fall out of love with his mistress? Adultery is the cause of the emergence of the most intense negative emotions, ranging from pain, resentment and ending with hatred for the traitor. To contain the listed feelings in oneself and at the same time to objectively assess what happened is available only to very restrained ladies.
So, what needs to be done so that the husband stops loving his mistress? You need to follow the guidelines below. In the first place, you should take "under the bridle" all the emotions and screams rushing out. Since, tantrums and reproaches will only lead to irritation on both sides and even greater alienation. Men are big egoists. Therefore, when they come home, they are most afraid of “brain removal” instead of a delicious dinner and an affectionate smile from their wife.
In order for a man to prefer his lawful wife to his mistress, he should surpass his rival in all respects. Excuses that there is not enough time or money are not an argument. You can improve your figure with the help of daily physical exercises, which do not have to be done in an expensive elite fitness club. Exercise is quite realistic and at home. Of course, you will have to spend money on changing the image, but this is a one-time waste. Here you need to decide what is more important: the return of the unfaithful spouse to the bosom of the family or savings, coupled with laziness. In addition, it is not recommended to forget about the "healing" power of intimacy in family relationships. By all means, you need to seek intimacy from your husband so that he is not enough for a rival. An attractive figure, which can only be obtained through sports training, and seductive underwear will reduce the likelihood of being refused to fulfill marital duty. In addition to the above, attention should also be paid to work on relationships and home comfort.
How to distinguish a crisis in a relationship from its end? How to stop deceiving yourself and admit that he will never be able to become a full-fledged partner for you again? Trying to get through to him or stop wasting time? We have combined all the experience of world psychologists and selected the 7 most obvious signs that love in your relationship is out of the question.
You rely only on yourself
Is it easier for you to order a taxi to the airport than to ask him to meet you? Do you know that if you offer him to pick up your clothes at the dry cleaners on the way, you will not avoid irritation? You do not want quarrels and prefer to solve minor domestic problems yourself, rather than asking him? This is what Akhmatova had in mind when she wrote: “How many requests does a beloved always have! A loved one does not have requests. When did he enthusiastically fulfill any of your wishes? That's right - when he loved you.
His mood is always with a minus sign
A man who ceases to experience love begins to feel dull irritation. This does not always happen consciously, and it can be difficult for an unhappy lover to distinguish between ordinary depression and temporary problems and a deep sense of dissatisfaction, which completely changes the general background and tone of your communication. In your presence, his head hurts, he annoyedly asks to speak more quietly, not to distract him with questions, not to annoy him with comments, not to slurp, not to smoke, not to whine, not to interfere with his doing anything ... Does he no longer spare your feelings? Doesn't follow the words? Have you forgotten about compliments, and the joy is the usual situation when the day passed without scandals about and without? Claims are growing like a snowball, and you feel cornered? Stop and think: maybe it's not that you're doing something wrong. Previously, he could not pay attention to some little things, but now he reproaches him for every reason? Finding fault even with the fact that he did not consider it a problem before? Unfortunately, if this does not last a couple of days, but months and years, then it is worth recognizing the obvious: only the disappearance of love makes men irritable and picky.
The lightness is gone
The house is the rear, where it is always good and cozy. And love is not only African passions, but a feeling of comfort, understanding, trust and common interests. It shouldn't be difficult in love - otherwise it suggests that something went wrong and a neurotic story arose on the topic of painful relationships, complexes and resentment. Of course, conflicts and quarrels happen in every couple, but if the period is prolonged, you need to look at the situation sensibly and soberly in order to understand what has broken. One of the indicators of problems that is very difficult to solve is the loss of a sense of ease in a relationship. Previously, you laughed at the same jokes, you were not bored together, but now there is no trace of this harmony? Silence has become painful, dialogue does not stick, and all attempts to arrange romance or an ordinary heart-to-heart talk turn into a theatrical performance, where there is everything except an atmosphere of comfort and joy? What do you think of what to say so as not to piss him off? How to make him smile? Hurry home so that he does not reproach you for being late at work? Or, on the contrary, be silent and drown your resentment if he left you and spends time with friends? Unfortunately, the disappearance of lightness and the opportunity to openly discuss the problem from relations is one of the signals that there is simply nothing to save here.
He doesn't want to spend time with you
He began to avoid you. At first you thought you were imagining. But no - he stays late at work, spends more and more time with friends, at home he asks not to disturb him, as it was a hard day. It seems to be nothing terrible - like everyone else. But, hand on heart, we understand that this happens to everyone who ... does not love his partner.
During courtship, a man looks like an impatient young man - he strives to be around, make pleasant surprises, and compliment. He never gets enough of you. Over time, passion goes away, but in a relationship where there are feelings, there is no place for situations where a man, under any pretext, tries to disappear from the house and finds a lot of excuses for such behavior. He has new activities and interests, new acquaintances, he is increasingly trying to avoid explanations and calls your questions “brain removal”. In a word, you understand everything, but in vain you hope that he just needs to rest, think, cool down. No! Unfortunately, the answer to the question of what went wrong is that he doesn't love you anymore.
You have no joint plans
A loving couple is characterized by the desire to make joint plans. In healthy relationships, people always have common goals and discuss plans to achieve them. Only this is a normal situation, everything else is not. Unwillingness to share plans, discuss problems, lack of interest in your affairs is one of the main signals that a man has ceased to experience emotions. As soon as the pronoun “we” leaves the lexicon when talking about the future, it is worth considering that something went wrong.
Doesn't want sex
Do you seriously think that a man who avoids physical contact with you loves you? Provided, of course, that we are talking about a healthy man. We have to disappoint you: the refusal of sex almost always means only what lies on the surface. If there is no sexual life for a long period of time, then there is every reason to suspect that the man has other relationships. However, in extremely rare cases, there are situations when he is tired or feels a decline from stress, but this period cannot last for a long time.
He criticizes you
Only having fallen out of love with a woman, a man allows himself a disrespectful attitude towards her. If he began to ridicule your shortcomings, reproach for weaknesses, devalue your achievements, then, unfortunately, it is important to understand: this is a very alarming bell. Do not comfort yourself with empty persuasions that he is simply tired and periodically breaks down over trifles - it is obvious that he has ceased to value you.
“Over time, feelings cool down, nothing can be done about it ..” - many people think. Or maybe not everything is lost, maybe there is a way to return the old feelings? Here's what to do if the husband fell out of love, we'll talk today.
How to understand that a husband has fallen out of love?
The candy-bouquet period passes, the freshness of feelings disappears, and the heart no longer beats frantically as soon as you hear the steps of a loved one in the hallway. So we learn that feelings have become dull, about the same thing happens with men, only here we have a different reaction to such news. Ladies, most likely, will begin to assure themselves that this cooling is temporary and will try in various ways to restore the sharpness of feelings. But the signs that the husband has fallen out of love will not be increased efforts, but their absence, the man will stop doing even what he used to do with joy. A man simply does not want to talk to you about his cooling, but prefers that you yourself understand this and let him go yourself. After all, as soon as you manage to understand that your husband has stopped loving you, you are likely to start an unpleasant conversation, saving him from this responsibility.
Why doesn't my husband love me?
Do you think what to do if the husband stopped loving? And how do you know this? Does he say that he doesn’t love you, or has your husband not said anything yet, but you just think that he doesn’t love you? Maybe some of his coldness is not caused by a change in your feelings, but by problems at work? In order not to be mistaken, talk to your husband, see how long this state lasts, how he behaves with you on weekends. If the suspicions were confirmed or the husband told you that he did not love you, and you really want to save the relationship, try to figure out the reasons. How did it happen that the husband fell out of love and stopped paying attention, or even left for another woman? Here are some suggestions about this.
- Men like to play pioneers, and if you have become a book read from cover to cover for him, you have ceased to be interesting to him. So he went to open further new horizons.
- He met another, and now he fell in love with her, but there was no place for you in his heart.
- Your husband has realized that you do not live up to his ideals. At the beginning of the relationship, it seemed to him that you were exactly what he needed, but now he has lost faith in this.
- You yourself are to blame for the fact that your husband fell out of love - betrayal and betrayal by men are very difficult to forgive. And some cannot forgive this at all and prefer to get rid of the “black page” in their lives.
- In fact, he never loved you, passion, passion, falling in love - that was all, but there was no love, desire to create a family with you. That is why, when the euphoria passed, he decided to leave.
What to do if the husband fell out of love?
First you need to decide what you really want - to return this man, or on reflection did you decide that he is not really needed? If you decide to fight, then do it wisely, thinking through each of your next steps. And in order not to make a mistake in the steps, you need to find out what exactly your husband did not like about you.
But most importantly, remember - you can’t command your heart, and if a man doesn’t want to be with you, then no tricks will help you achieve this. In this case, it is better to let him go and learn to live without him.
Husband fell out of love with his wife? How can a woman understand this and what should a wife do, if this is really the case? The recommendations and advice of psychologists are most effective in this situation. To begin with, let's analyze the signs of a spouse's indifference to his other half and prevention, so that these problems bypass your side.
The wife must fully understand the motives of the man, to study his psychological state. Only after that it is worth setting a goal for yourself: to return the feelings of the chosen one, to warm them up with your active actions, or to let the man go to all four sides.
We will also consider the factors that indirectly and directly affect the process of relationships in married couples and the adoption of important decisions that determine their future status.
A man and a woman lie on the bed and look at the ceiling. Thoughts of a woman: “Silence. Doesn't want to talk. Surely he has already stopped loving me, he has another. The relationship is over." Thoughts of a man: “A fly. A fly on the ceiling... How does it hold up?”
author unknown
Husband does not love his wife: signs
A crisis in a relationship overtakes 99% of couples in love. Only with the advent of great life experience, the spouses manage to firmly maintain a balance of feelings and respect for each other. The stages of doubt are experienced not only by a woman, but even men are prone to jealousy for no reason and depressive states caused by fatigue, problems at work and personal life.The main signs that a man no longer experiences love feelings in relation to his soulmate:
- absolute indifference to her affairs;
- does not sleep with her in the same bed, or turns away regularly from her;
- ignores joint breakfasts, dinners and lunches on weekends;
- does not give gifts and demands them himself;
- does not want to hear about her difficulties and does not dedicate to her affairs;
- find fault with trifles and criticize for minor miscalculations;
- does not fulfill her requests and obligations at home;
- communicates regularly with other women;
- ignores calls from his wife and does not call back himself;
- behaves selfishly, not combining achievements, goals and objectives in the word "we".
There is no need to take drastic measures until the true causes and motives of the spouse's behavior are clarified, they can be caused by external circumstances that the spouse may not even be aware of.
Women are by nature mysterious and unpredictable creatures, but do not underestimate men in this regard. Even at the first stage of a relationship, a man is able to misunderstand his nature and confuse falling in love with sincere and full feelings. Further, this develops into misunderstanding and a complete lack of sympathy for his chosen one. In this case, only parting will help the couple live happily and peacefully.
In situations where the woman is directly to blame, she will personally need to correct her attitude towards herself. Often after betrayal, women demand to themselves, after forgiving a man, the same attitude as before. But to return feelings in full is almost impossible and the behavior of a man becomes unpredictable. A detailed reset of relationships and a change in views on their status are required.
A man does not tolerate the humiliation of his personal dignity, if the spouse, by mistake or inexperience, in a circle of friends, at a mass event or even in a personal conversation, questioned her husband’s high self-esteem, then expect an instant cooling of feelings. The wife is able to return them to their former level, quickly apologizing, or competently taking the situation to the rank of comic. In the hope of a sense of humor and understanding on the part of the husband, it is really possible to correct this miscalculation, but from now on it is necessary to increase concentration and prevent this from happening.
If a man falls in love with another woman, then his feelings for his wife change. When it is clear that he has lost interest in relationships, but his eyes are burning, this is a clear sign of a relationship on the side. In this situation, the wife decides what she should do, return the wrong person or file for divorce. Often, the presence of joint children forces the spouse to forgive and compromise in the address of the betrothed, but mistakes should not be forgiven more than once.
As a result, signs are critical and signal. In the first case, it is better to get a divorce, and in the second, turn on the mode of purification or a new start in the relationship and try to save the marriage.
How to distinguish signs by type is indicated in the table:
What should a wife do?
The psychology of relationships is complex and branchy, but the solution to all problems lies in simple truths. It is required to be attentive to the interests and desires of each other, to support in positive endeavors and hobbies. The ability to prioritize and analyze the current state of affairs helps to avoid critical decisions in the fate of married couples.A woman must understand what a man appreciates most in her. If this is beauty, then you need to be more demanding about your appearance, discussing issues with your husband. It is not difficult to find a compromise, but the first step in the search is to start discussing the problem.
For example, a spouse wants to see his chosen one have larger breasts, but after intimate communication with the other half, it turns out that he was inept with the little one, or other caresses are offered to him in return in bed. As a result, everyone is happy and happy, and if ignored and shy for a couple, these minor problems could grow into a huge lump of misunderstanding and outright hostility.
It is important to stop any family problem in the bud, 90% of all domestic troubles and inconsistencies in the relationship of spouses are solved by communication and compromise.
The other extreme of the relationship can be excessive guardianship and control of the spouse. Restriction in everything can literally crush the love of a man, his soul and mind will rush to freedom and break through any, even the most tenacious defense of a woman. Otherwise, he will withdraw into himself and close in the garage, at work or on the couch, watching from the sidelines over the course of family affairs, not particularly taking part in them.
In this situation, it is advisable to gradually lose control, try to understand and interest the spouse in an attractive goal, and give freedom in achieving it: raise children, save up for a new expensive car, open a family business, give a room in the apartment for repairs at his discretion.
Husband "cooled" to his wife
Psychologists use the technique of oral influence on couples. Nothing prevents a woman from using her speech for the benefit of family happiness. You just need to praise your husband for everything positive that he does, evaluate the man’s attempts to make family well-being higher, thank him for his support and fulfillment of household obligations. Even with intimacy, it is important to positively evaluate the actions of the spouse and his dignity.
A husband does not love his wife when she deprives him of the opportunity to pursue his hobby. If a woman does not like him hanging out on a fishing trip, in a garage, a stadium or watching TV, it is best to interest him in common hobbies, but which will be of interest to both. Then even fading feelings can shine as brightly as during a honeymoon.
Let's highlight the main actions of the spouse that can change the behavior of the husband and save:
- positive attitude towards spouse and family affairs;
- attentive attitude to their appearance;
- regular compliments to her husband;
- organizing joint events and supporting the hobbies of the spouse;
- the ability to set specific goals and achieve them together;
- to force a man to achieve himself again;
- pamper with gifts, attention and caresses in bed.
A woman is encouraged to turn into a girl from time to time, play with her man, including light flirting and mystery. If you do not overdo it, then this method is the most effective, coupled with the recommendations of experienced psychologists, who first of all work directly on the female psyche, making you fall in love with yourself.
A man is loudly indignant at a woman who has stopped loving him - and quickly consoles himself;
a woman does not express her feelings so violently when she is left, but remains inconsolable for a long time.
Jean de La Bruyère
Do not overdo it in search of self-love, because a man in a fit of jealousy is capable of rash acts, protecting his property, first explain to him that for the moment he is free from responsibility for your joint relationship.
Love and respect go side by side, they cannot "live" in married couples separately from each other. Psychologists advise letting go of the situation, and in the most critical moments, the man, and if he does not leave, show respect for your beloved and leave yourself. Real feelings are tested at a distance, a change in the status of a relationship will make a man think and take a different look at his wife and his behavior.
Strong-willed women do not worry about the feelings of their husband, they think about their independence and love for the common home. It can be children, a joint business, material values, or even a dacha.
When a woman has something to find an outlet for her emotions, she has no time to think about the love states of her husband, she takes him in her arms and gives free rein to joint emotions. During this period of activity, a surge of hormones returns bright colors to relationships even in the very old age of a married couple. A man behaves after such events as loyally as possible.
In the following table, we will analyze the main actions of the spouse to strengthen the relationship and the reaction of the man to them:
Depending on the reaction of the husband to active actions, the spouse can understand in detail how critical their relationship is. He simply does not notice his wife in order to temporarily relax, or he has a completely different life on his mind. For a targeted test on the psyche of the husband of the active methodology of specialists, try to identify all the requests and needs of the spouse. All problems are able to go away by themselves in cases where it is possible to find the root or germ of misunderstanding.
What to do if the husband has fallen out of love, treats badly, begins to dissolve his hands and be rude:
- get a divorce and find yourself a better option;
- change dramatically and return feelings;
- make the husband apologize and change his principles and attitude towards marriage;
- stopped loving - unworthy of such a wonderful woman, put pressure on self-esteem;
- go to a psychologist together for recommendations and practice.
Train courage, courage and courage, know that the words and the emotional background of your speeches can turn a man on and make him a toy in the hands of a powerful woman. He will have no choice but to understand that he is losing his only love and the relationship will sparkle with a fresh overflow of feelings.
"Warm up" love or say goodbye
When the wife of the famous football player David Beckham, Victoria found out about the betrayal, she endured and said: "All the statements of the mistress are lies - I believe my husband." The couple is still together. There are many similar examples, strong women know how to wait out the crisis and interpret it correctly.As a result, if we put together the recommendations of psychologists, it becomes clear that at all stages and periods of a relationship it is important to show mutual respect, be attentive and appreciate feelings. A woman holds in her closed palm the same impulse called “love”. At the moment of being distracted by household chores, maintaining comfort, she opens her hand, loses awareness of the situation, and with it the feelings of her husband.
For those women who are not ready to work on relationships, or they initially made a mistake, it is recommended to choose a new chosen one for themselves or change dramatically. Husband fell out of love - not a sentence, life goes on.
Those who wish family happiness with their only spouse will need willpower, the ability to be a friend, lover and business partner all rolled into one, then emotional outbursts will automatically warm up the spouse’s love, at least you will never lose respect for yourself.
Tell us in the comments how you manage to warm up “love”, tell interesting stories about the choice of new chosen ones, or how you manage to keep your husband’s feelings at the highest level for many years. It is especially interesting to know how young couples prevent relationships?
