Why don't guys write first? Should I write to the first guy? Is it possible to write to a guy first: advice from psychologists

Oh, if our great-great-grandmothers knew how hard it is to wait for a response from a young man when you write to him on social networks. How nervous you are if he answers, but he never texts first. They would have our worries! In their time, everything was simple: I wrote a letter and wait at the window for a month or two, until the letter was taken to the neighboring province, until it was handed over, and there, either the horse fell ill, or the driver got drunk, and the answer did not come.


Modern means of communication allow you to receive an answer almost instantly. This is provided that your subject of interest can type quickly and is currently at the computer. The rhythm of our life has accelerated so much that we often get to know each other in networks, fall in love in absentia on the Internet, we make an offer by SMS.

Have you noticed that many girls love fairy tales about princesses, about a handsome prince who will definitely come, get married, and they will live happily ever after. Growing up young persons, even independent and active, everyone also dream of feelings.

And yesterday's girls expect actions, courtship, interest, and the like from young people. But today often the initiative comes from the woman herself.

Even in those strict times, when girls did not have the right to be the first to show interest in the young man they liked, they managed to do it. Fans, flies on faces, facial expressions, gestures were used.

modern it is much easier for women to express interest in someone. It is enough just to like the material or photo you like, write a few lines, congratulate on the holiday. But whether your message goes unnoticed or turns into an interesting conversation depends on the young man. A man in love is ready to conquer Everest for you! Many other actions and words also speak of signs of attention to you, which ones - read.

There are situations when a man always answers your messages, but he never writes first. Let's try to figure it out.

Putting everything on the shelves, drawing conclusions

Why does a man not write first, but always answers? Let's try to understand the reasons indicated by the inhabitants of various forums:

Humility, inexperience


Real fact, especially for young guys not having much experience with the opposite sex. Plus, the constant advice of senior comrades: "the less we love a woman ...".

Fear of appearing uninteresting and being ridiculed

Yes, a serious reason that encourages men to wait for letters from girls, but not to write them themselves. It can and fear that some words or topics will not please the virtual interlocutor, and she will simply stop communicating. Become a laughingstock for a girl - a painful blow to self-love any man.

Employment


Serious men, whose work is not connected with the constant presence at the computer, do not have the opportunity and time to send greeting letters to girls. It often affects fatigue, especially if a person is engaged in heavy physical work.

Dislike of letters and the Internet

Not all men like to write letters. For many it is much easier to communicate by phone or in person. Haven't you met young people who can't type fast? It may be nonsense to you, but it happens.

Disease

The reason, of course, is serious, but if you have enough strength to answer, then why do they disappear if you need to write first? Or is it the unwillingness to upset the girl with a story about a deadly temperature of 37.1 ° C and an enemy bullet that struck him when approaching the computer?

Loss of all contacts and letters


It is unlikely that any of today's young people keep a paper version of notebooks with addresses and phone numbers. Therefore, a covered device can really paralyze communication with a girl for a short time. Good reason, but if the technique of a young person is constantly “buggy”, then most likely the virus wound up not in his gadget, but in relation to you.

Waiting position

This is usually the fault or too serious young people(we'll see what happens) or typical Lovelace, accustomed to female attention and how real psychologists gently stir up interest in their person.

They do not show initiative, and in response messages they subtly hook the girls on the hook of interest.

Simple human courtesy

It forces you to constantly answer the girl, but not to write first yourself and such a quality as politeness. If the letters are interesting and the young man is well brought up, then why not? Whether the girl’s interest lies behind polite communication simply as a good interlocutor or it’s not just politeness, time will tell. But is it worth it to be ignorant for months, if things are still there?

According to stereotypes, a guy should always be the first to initiate communication. It used to be that the girl who writes to a man first is frivolous and obsessive, so the ladies were looking forward to the first step from their lover.

If a guy really liked a representative of the opposite sex, he must definitely tell her about it, otherwise he simply risks missing his chance. Even the rejection that he may receive in return will not be as painful as male cowardice. Just imagine that you do not dare to start a dialogue with the girl you like, and then you will think that happiness was almost in your hands, and you missed it.

Why can a girl write first too?

All the stereotypes about who should write first have long been outdated. Girls are psychologically more courageous and strong than guys, so they can easily take the initiative and start communicating with a person on their own.

Even if a woman does not attract a man with her appearance, he is unlikely to ignore her message, as he will be interested in her courage. And then, after talking with a representative of the opposite sex a little longer, the girl will get a chance to show him her mental data, a high level of intelligence and other positive qualities.

Some girls prefer to avoid taking the initiative, for fear of seeming intrusive. However, you must remember that your message will not be viewed negatively. Men, on the other hand, love brave women.

In addition, the fair sex may refuse to communicate with a guy just to intrigue him. It would seem that quite recently they had a nice time on their first date, and after that the girl disappears, and initially she let the guy know that she was interested in him. Such behavior, of course, is acceptable, but in this way the girls run the risk of getting a response from the guy.

Remember one thing: if you really liked this or that person, you should not bother yourself with what is right and what is wrong. Do what you want. If you miss someone, tell him about it. If you want to meet, invite. If you need any help, please ask. Remember that life is too short and unpredictable, so you may not have another chance.

Why do you need boy? To care, love, look into his eyes and know that you are also loved ... To walk by the hand and in the arms of a guy forget about the pain that people around him bring ... To rejoice and experience with him ... And on weekends, wallow and watch favorite movie together ... To help in difficult times, to swear and reconcile in five minutes ... But not everyone needs guys for this, so do you need boy?

Instruction

So, is it necessary or not? Very simple. If you need a person for any purpose who can be called "your", then, of course, in this case, boy needed! And if there are no reasons, or there are reasons that directly indicate that any “my boy"will only be a hindrance, then of course, under such circumstances, boy not needed. "But", as always, this word appears when the problem is already, at first glance, solved and makes us think that, in fact, this issue is very difficult. Where, say, a fourteen-year-old girl will have doubts when one morning it occurs to her that she definitely needs someone whom she could call "boyfriend"? Putting aside thoughts and suppose that yesterday another girl of the same age said that she already has a real boy. At that moment, lightning flashed in the head of a fourteen-year-old girl, and a thunder of envy went through a shock wave throughout her body. "I want too!" - a cause arose, and soon, as a result, appeared boy, who is unaware that he has become only an instrument for getting rid of envy. After a while, a conflict most likely arises between them, and, figuratively speaking, with a trauma in her heart, the girl cries all night on her bed. As a conclusion: it is unlikely that such young adolescents could understand whether they need boy or not.

At a more mature age, the sexual aspect comes to the fore in the relationship of both sexes. This aspect, in the background, is usually followed by the fact of a social relationship, i.e. how you are treated not only by your friends, but also by complete strangers. And when these two aspects are combined, then, in order not to pass for the whole district as “overly accessible”, you have to call your own guy and refer to the seriousness in the relationship.
Other girls continue the policy of a fourteen-year-old girl and begin dating, only to “show off” in front of their friends, because no one has yet canceled the feeling of female envy. Usually, such girls soon also remain offended, and even humiliated, but continue to "bend their line."

Sometimes for girls, the presence is a certain one, in front of which they were still children, and after which they were already adults. In their eyes, they grew up several years in one day. The same is smoking. Therefore, it is precisely such a desire that you have boy should be regarded as a bad habit.

But the main indicator of the need boy or not, if we mean by this word a person who is very dear to you, to whom you feel more than affection, is an ordinary heart. And, as you know, you can’t order the heart to love one and keep away from the other, but you can order the consciousness to save your heart from severe shocks.

Need boy or not? Never be guided by selfish motives in this matter. This is not such a point in life where you can put a tick, then erase it, and put it a few more times. No one, of course, is immune from mistakes, but we must avoid at least those that happen through our fault.

If you love a person and want to always spend time with him, feel his closeness to you as much as possible, then there is no difference how to call this person - a friend, boy or husband. Just be with him always.

note

Why does a woman need her man? Why do women need men? To: To not be lonely. There is nothing if there is no one nearby. The very one, the only one with whom the woman plans to go to the registry office. Why does a woman need her own man? - To be his wife.

Helpful advice

Many girls in their teens dream of having a boyfriend, but when the moment of truth comes and the lover knocks on her door, the girl may flash before her eyes: “Why do you need a boyfriend?”. And to some extent, she will be right, since rushing headlong into the pool without recognizing, at the same time, a person properly, of course, is unthinkable.

Sources:

  • what kind of guy do you want

The first date causes so many experiences and fears. After all, you want to please a young man, impress and interest on a first date. In this case, the main thing is not to worry, calm down, be yourself and follow a few simple recommendations.

Instruction

Do not be nervous. Due to strong excitement, the reaction can be unpredictable: you will talk a lot and tell too much, or, on the contrary, shut up and answer questions in monosyllables. It is important to relax and get sincere pleasure from communication, to be friendly and relaxed. The tension is felt and creates a feeling that the guy is doing something wrong, and this spoils the impression of the first date and of you.

Consider topics for conversation ahead of time. You will be calmer if you know exactly how to fill the awkward silence. Come up with at least 10 topics or funny stories to talk about. If you know where the first date will be, try to find interesting stories about this place. Then you can put it in place and show your erudition.

Choose the right topics for conversation. There are unwritten rules for a conversation on a first date that you should follow. Do not touch on past relationships, exes, your problems and other unpleasant topics, and you should not obviously brag. The conversation should be light, pleasant, relaxed and without negativity. You can discuss what is happening around, for example, if you are walking in the park and saw dogs, you can discuss animals, your past pets, funny stories about animals.

Be interested. On the first date, you should be interested in your boyfriend, get to know him, and not just talk about yourself. But the interest should also be delicate, and not in the form of an interrogation. Find out the similarity of your views on certain things in order to understand your compatibility. Men love it when they are sincerely interested in them and their opinion. But do not touch on the topics of income and former relationships.

Flirt with a man. Do not forget that on a date you need to show interest in a companion - laugh at his jokes, smile more often, praise, look into his eyes and touch his hand a couple of times. But you should know the measure and not overdo it, so as not to seem too accessible. You have to show interest, but don't settle for sex on the first date. In this way, it is difficult to interest a guy; rather, it will push him away.

Be yourself and enjoy the process. You do not need to control your every movement, think over phrases and constantly think about the impression you make. You are not on an exam and should enjoy pleasant company, and if you are really good together, everything will work out by itself.

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Sometimes a young man in his life faced such a problem as the fear of meeting a girl he liked. It would seem that he is not bad, he is confident in his position and status and has everything to make his relationship strong, having a certain base. But, like a boy, he got lost, forgotten, could not ... Fear of girls is due to some psychological problems.

Why did the guy begin to be afraid of beautiful women?

Considering the causes of the problem of men's fear of women, it is worth starting with the fear of any guy being humiliated due to rejection. Whatever the young man, but the principle of "taste and color ..." has not been canceled. This is where male pride plays its role. It is very important for a man to be a leader, to have some authority over the ladies, but when he hears a refusal from them, he may experience negative emotions.

The second reason is the issue of financial insolvency. Seeing a well-groomed, using expensive cosmetics, decently and fashionably dressed girl, a young man wonders that his financial situation is much lower than her requests.

The third reason is the thought that she must have someone. She is beautiful, she smells of charm and sophistication, so why should she be alone? Surely there is already someone who has taken a place in the heart of the beauty.

The fourth psychological barrier is insecurity in one's appearance, in fact, it is the fear of an aesthetic inconsistency of the fair sex due to the style or obvious cheapness of clothes, hairstyles, shoes, accessories, in some cases - in a car or apartment, which a young man has, which, like clothes, show his external essence.

And finally, the last problem is the fear of intellectual inconsistency. Everyone is well aware that the established opinion "All great people were men" makes some guys think that his companion should be at least less erudite than he is.

So a stumbling block arises when, in an outside conversation, it turns out that the lady is much smarter than the one who turned her close attention to her.

How to deal with the fear of beautiful girls?

All the main reasons stem from fear and self-doubt. What is this uncertainty? This is an unverified answer. After all, he did not even have time to ask, find out, find out ... He simply drew conclusions, brought his conclusions, compared them with a few facts and, taking a deep breath, went on.

Therefore, the main way to deal with all of the above reasons is to develop or awaken self-confidence, get rid of the fear of taking a minimal step forward.

After all, it is this step that will already relieve some doubts, will make it possible to think over a further plan to try to please a beautiful creature.

Whatever one may say, but appearance, amount of money and education are far from competitors of masculinity, nobility, physical and spiritual strength and, of course, male confidence!

Related videos

There is an opinion that a guy should always text a girl first. However, some ladies prefer to take the first step on their own. But sometimes it happens that a girl simply stops writing to a young man, and her behavior has its own meaning.

Reasonable compromise: to write or not?

As a rule, frequent calls and messages from your girlfriend are not expected. Everything has a reasonable limit. And if the girl is cultured, educated, she won’t call every hour. Such messages will not lead to good things. In addition to negative feelings (irritation, anger), there will certainly be no other, and even more so, positive emotions.

Girls themselves are waiting for a call or message from a loved one. Sometimes waiting is hard work. Sometimes it drags on and there is a desire to remind yourself of yourself. Such a step is welcome, but even here it is important not to spoil the opinion about yourself, because the guys have other things to do, problems that need to be solved without the participation of outsiders.

It is important to be tolerant of the freedom of personal space of each of the partners.

As a rule, girls are big lovers of talking and talking on the phone, and guys are not so talkative. However, it also happens when one call from a girl can really change something in a guy's life. It's no secret that one call is a chance to get to know each other, to start relationships both close and friendly.

Beloved woman does not write what does it mean?

If a girl does not interrupt your phone with regular messages, this does not mean that she has an interest in your person. Most likely, she is waiting for a call or SMS from you, afraid to seem annoying, or really busy with business (working, studying, etc.). Such excitement arises in a little insecure young men.

If there is no doubt about the feelings of your beloved, then there is no reason to worry about infrequent calls.

Talking and writing on the phone is not the only way to communicate, but a reliable way to maintain good relations, a means that will allow you to turn to each other at the right time. A smart guy knows that if the girl doesn't call herself, he is in charge of their relationship and manages her by deciding when to call and text and how many times.

It is advisable not to get involved in telephone correspondence and conversations and not to sort things out for any reason and without. Let the phone be just a tool for organizing meetings (live communication). You should not reduce the development of relations simply by exchanging messages on the phone. This is the wrong path, and it has no positive future.

Of course, it also happens when a girl really doesn’t want to write or call you. It's not that hard to understand. During the conversation, the girl does not burn with the desire to communicate with you or resets your call, does not answer SMS, or tries to quickly end the conversation. It is better to try to find out what is the reason, in order to know if she needs you or not. Ask a direct question and consider her answer. You will feel if the girl is no longer yours.

There is no specific list of what a guy should be. Each girl chooses her ideal man based on her preferences and habits. One loves seriousness and prudence, the other does not see her beloved without a sense of humor. But there are character traits that a young man must possess in order to be a good husband and father.

Achievements and habits

Fixed salary. Young students can afford to take a girl on a date to the park. But when an adult 25-year-old guy continues to save on his beloved, it's worth thinking about your future. It's not about commercialism, but about the ability to provide a family with at least a minimum.

After 20 years, a guy should imagine what he wants from life and how to achieve it. When a young man lives one day and does not think about his future, he begins to degrade. It is difficult to meet and plan family life with a person for whom there is only today.

A man should be able to protect his girlfriend from bullies and attacks. This will require physical strength. It is not necessary to be an athlete or a pumped-up thug, but you need to be able to stand up for your beloved.

A guy with a strong character is valued among girls. Only in this way can he overcome all the difficulties in life, protect his family from problems and hardships. Behind such a man, women will feel like behind a stone wall.

No or few bad habits. It is permissible to drink a little on a holiday. But if a man can’t imagine a Friday without alcohol or smokes several packs a day, think about your future. You and your children will have to live in an unhealthy environment, so stay away from men with bad habits.

Character traits

Reliability is a very important trait in a man. A girl needs to know that she can rely on her partner. When help is needed, he will provide it, and will not throw “I'm busy” into the phone. It also implies that the guy knows how to keep his word and keeps his promises.

A caring man is the dream of many women. Among his friends and at work, he can be tough and domineering, but at home he takes care of his girlfriend. Gifts, help around the house, sympathy or elementary care during illness. Such small actions are worth much more than big words and promises.

With a sense of humor. Girls love men who can make them laugh. With the help of a good joke, you can melt the ice during a quarrel, solve many problems in a relationship. Living with a cheerful and optimistic guy is much more pleasant than with a gloomy and serious one.

Ability to make decisions quickly and effectively. Girls turn to their man for advice. And if he cannot deal with the problem, the girl will seek help elsewhere or rely only on her own strength. Therefore, it is desirable that the guy was with a lively mind and knew how to solve life's troubles.

But the most important rule is that the guy must be loved. Because no ideal man who meets all of the listed characteristics will suit you if you do not love him. Any little thing will annoy, and all the advantages will look fake.

To attract the attention of a guy, it is enough to write one or two words that will be compliments in his direction, for example, “beautiful” or “avatar”. At the end, be sure to add a smiling or laughing emoticon. You can even limit yourself to one smiling or winking emoji as a comment. This will be enough for the guy to want to go to your page. You should not leave a lot of notes, just comment on 1-2 photos so that you are not considered overly annoying.

If you already know the guy and he is your friend, you can leave more comments and do it more often. Since all entries will be available to you, you can comment more often. Rate photos, videos, and other posts and be verbose. You can praise the guy for his creativity or appreciate his humor, etc.

Pay special attention to commenting on the posts on the guy's wall (home page). You can express your point of view regarding a particular publication and its content - agree with a current quote, give an example from your own life, etc. Also, to look more creative in the guy's eyes, try commenting on his post by posting a song or animation below that makes sense.

Do not forget to put "likes" - marks "", which are available in almost all social networks. It is not necessary to comment on each entry, but at the same time, you can safely put marks, which sometimes, better than any words, will make the guy pay attention to you. And if he appreciates brevity and is easy by nature, you can leave funny emoticons under his records.

Even more than likes, reposts are valued - sending other people's publications to your own page indicating the source. Repost a few of the guy's posts that you think are the most important. As a result, he will understand that you have common interests and views on life with him.

It doesn't matter if you just started chatting with a guy or your virtual communication has grown into a real relationship. In any case, sooner or later, a young man may stop writing and express a desire to see each other. Why does this happen and what to do in such a situation. Are these two questions keeping me awake? We will finally answer them in such a way that everything will immediately become clear to you. You will be able to understand the reasons for this phenomenon and find a way out of a rather difficult situation, find out whether it is possible to write first, what absolutely should not be sent, and what phrases are best suited.

There are several versions of this behavior:

  1. Health problems. A young man could easily become seriously ill or even go to the hospital. Maybe he just doesn't want to upset the girl or lie to her.
  2. Loss of a loved one. The departure of loved ones is always a hard blow, after which you don’t want to communicate with anyone. Perhaps the fact is that a man does not want to be sympathized with, because he is already so bad at heart.
  3. Urgent departure. It may well be that your interlocutor had to leave the city in a hurry: to go on a business trip, to visit relatives in a village where there is no connection, or somewhere else.
  4. Lost phone number. If we are talking about SMS, then we can assume that the man does not have your contact details. He could also easily lose his mobile, or the device simply broke.
  5. Lack of tender feelings. If the guy did not feel sympathy for you, but only communicated out of politeness, sooner or later he will disappear from sight. If he is interested in correspondence, then by all means, no matter what, he will get in touch.
  6. Desire for virtual communication. There are a lot of such young people on the Web, they present themselves as those who they really are not, they tell what has never happened. The girls compliment them, and then they suddenly disappear.
  7. Loss of interest. After 2-4 months of virtual communication, he will certainly disappear, and if the relationship has not developed into something more, then you can say goodbye to him.
  8. Appearance of another girl. This is the most common turn of events. A normal young man warns about him in advance, but if he feels guilty, then you can not hope for anything.

There are a lot of reasons for a guy to stop texting, as you can see. If this happened by coincidence, you should not worry. But in case of deliberate ignoring, further relations can be put an end to.

We take into account the situation

Before drawing any conclusions, you need to consider what kind of relationship you have with a young man.

If he likes a girl, but he still does not write

Shy guys are very often afraid to write to the girl they like. It seems to them that she will figure them out and begin to make fun of them, or, worse, use them for their own purposes. In this case, they can like your photos, but not send messages.

It can also be assumed that recently the man had a serious relationship, and he does not want to step on the same rake again. Perhaps the person decided to take a break, and then you got caught and he realized that he had strong feelings for you. Communicating with you, he will not be able to erase his new source of inspiration from his heart.

Before thinking about any actions, remember if you accidentally quarreled or offended your interlocutor.

Sometimes you can hurt with just one phrase. If this was the case, then the reason for the lack of SMS from him may lie in banal pride. The same applies to those couples who quarreled. In this case, male pride and unwillingness to show weakness will not allow the first to go to reconciliation. Perhaps a person is afraid that in response they will ask him: “Why are you writing to me”, “What do you want from me” and other similar questions will be asked.

Also, the guy may be shy to write, then expect him to like your photos. This means that he can no longer dislike you, and if you write the right message for him, he will definitely answer you.

Do you want to get detailed step-by-step instructions on how to get acquainted with men on the Internet? We recommend reading free checklist Alexey Chernozem "How to build relationships on the Internet and translate them into happy real ones." You will learn how to create an attractive image on the network, where to start dating and how to transfer them from the Internet to the real plane.

The book is free. To download, click here on this link, leave your e-mail and an email will be sent to the mail with a link to the pdf-file.

Why he never makes himself known, but always answers

The nature of this phenomenon is banal: a man is modest, embarrassed or afraid to show his interest. He can also be just polite when it's inconvenient to ignore others.

It is also worth thinking about the fact that your interlocutor is simply busy, not only at work, but also in life. Yes, perhaps, at the very moment when you wrote to him, his wife and several other children are sitting at his side.

Reasons why guys don't get in touch first

Everything here is similar to what was said in the subsection "Why the guy does not write - obvious reasons." But there are some other circumstances:

  • want to be chased;
  • wish to arouse interest;
  • afraid to take the initiative;
  • they don't know how to talk to girls.

Is it normal if a man likes a photo, but does not contact

Everything is pretty obvious here: he liked your photos (not necessarily you, maybe the place itself!). At the same time, you need to understand that even if he liked you, then a modest person who is afraid of being rejected can sit on the side of the monitor. It is also likely that the man simply has not yet found the right words and decided to wait a bit, or he always has no time. But the most common option is that he just wants to draw attention to himself so that you write to him first.

What does it mean if after the first meeting he does not want to communicate

The conclusion may be that he did not like you. Although it may be the other way around, they liked him very much, and it even scared him, because he wanted a relationship without obligations or simple flirting, so as not to promise to love forever. To find out what the real problem is, talk directly to the young man.

The second option is why not allow that your admirer decides not to answer you simply because he hates wasting time on SMS and long correspondence. It may be much easier for him to talk on the phone or even walk in the city.

What to do if the guy does not want to chat

The answer is obvious: you need to step over pride and make him write to him first. Men, although hunters by nature, but believe me, they will be flattered to receive a few compliments or questions about him.

If you do not seem boring to him, he will not go anywhere, he will answer. But if there is no response message, there is no need to be assertive and write whole poems to him, just wait.

It is definitely necessary to be the first to get in touch even when you have done something wrong in front of the guy. In this case, you can write like this: “Perhaps I did something wrong, I feel very bad about this thought, let me fix it.”

Of course, there is such a category of men who do not like it when an acquaintance begins on a female initiative, so they feel out of place. But you need to understand that there are very few such "special" ones. They should not be the first to offer friendship, call for a walk.

The termination of receipt of messages from him or their rare receipt, if you delve into psychology, may indicate that he decided to pause in order to slow down the process of getting to know each other a little. Maybe it's all too fast for him and he needs more time to get close to the person. In this case, in no case should you put pressure on him, give him this time. After 5-7 days of silence, you can unobtrusively write: “Are you all right? Worried". Such attention should flatter him.

If you have already had many meetings with him in real life, wait about a week, and only then begin to act. Invite him to meet, discuss something important, or ask for some advice. You should not openly write: “Where have you gone”, “Why don’t you write”, etc.

After 6 months, the light, as a rule, fades away, the desire to spend time together becomes less and less. This may be the reason for the abrupt cessation of correspondence on his initiative. In this case, you need to wait 1-2 weeks. If there is no news from him until then, carefully ask what you did wrong, ask for help to correct the situation. An adequate person will always answer such a question, and if he is not like that, then why is it needed?

If you don't want to lose your boyfriend forever, never throw tantrums at him! If he tells you that he stopped writing to you because he fell in love with another girl, say: “I hope you are happy! Don't worry about me!"

Another option to find out what happened is to add friends to mutual friends on VK and, when they are online, ask them about it. If they say that he is alive and well, there is no problem, take a look at his page on social networks. There you can politely ask for an explanation of such behavior.

What to write first if he has no messages

Before writing something on VKontakte and other social networks, think over the text. If you don’t want to be banal, replace the word “Hello” with “Greetings”, “Good afternoon”, “Hello”, “I wish you good health”, etc. Then ask some leading question.

You can write phrases like these to acquaintances: “I heard that you are going to enter Moscow State University. I would like to do this too, any advice? As for strangers (especially relevant for a contact): “I decided to look at your page, and I saw that you are interested in ....”, I wonder what it gives you?”, “I couldn’t pass by, I see, you are also interested in .... It's so hard now to find someone who understands you!

If you have known a person for a long time (more than six months), you can ask him:

  • I'm so worried because I haven't heard from you for so long...
  • I was offended by you, at least let me know about myself so that I could sleep more peacefully ...
  • It's amazing how fast time flies, haven't talked to you for a long time!
  • I miss you, do you have time for me?

This video will help you understand why the guy does not write and what to do in this situation:

Dear ladies, no guy is worth harassing himself with the question of why he does not write. If you did what we suggested, and nothing has changed, this is simply not your person.

Probably, every girl is familiar with the feeling of falling in love when a guy likes you so much that you constantly think about him, want to meet, dream. At such moments, the girl forgets about everything, her head is occupied with thoughts about the chosen one of the heart, she constantly talks only about him. It is during such a period that the fair sex becomes vulnerable, impressionable. Often they are visited by doubts: “does he like me”, “why doesn’t he call”, “why the guy doesn’t write”. We are all used to the fact that the first step, usually, should be taken by a man, so if a guy remains silent for too long, this is alarming. How to understand such a situation, what to do, and most importantly, to maintain calm and peace of mind?

Why doesn't the guy write first

Male pride is an unknown phenomenon. Therefore, girls often have to puzzle over how to find an approach to a guy. What is it like to wait for texts for hours, bite your fingers into the blood and wonder why he does not write. Suspicious thoughts immediately come to mind. Suddenly you did something wrong or said something wrong. There is no need to throw tantrums and make an elephant out of a fly. Men's logic is much simpler than women's.

Although they say that female logic does not exist at all. Men are accustomed to speak directly and do what is imprinted in their head. A woman, on the other hand, can make a list of actions, prepare for its implementation, but do nothing from this list, because on the way to the store or home, new ideas will arise in her head or a thousand more things will appear!

If a young man does not write to you, this does not mean that he has no desire to communicate with you. I will not reassure, there is still a percentage of the probability of reluctance. But this is the case when you yourself know why he does not want to write. If this happened for no reason and you don’t understand what’s the matter, then maybe the guy is just busy and he doesn’t have time to answer.

Guys are not as careful with personal things as girls. Married women will not let you lie. Their spouses constantly throw socks around the house, and T-shirts and T-shirts hang decorously on the backs of chairs and sofas. Therefore, it is possible that the guy forgot his phone in the car or somewhere else.

Guys are free-spirited beings, so guys often don't write first. And if you densely sat on him, attacking with SMS messages, naturally he will want to stay away from telephone correspondence and chat with friends.

Write yourself or not?

Often a girl may be visited by the thought: “Should I write to a guy first?” - if he does not call or write at least one day. Or after the first meeting. Constant doubts and worries that maybe something is wrong gnaw at the girl. And she would be glad to take the initiative herself, but the girlish pride given by nature does not always allow this. She is afraid of being ridiculed, of getting into an awkward position. A girl would rather suffer, torment herself with dull thoughts, but she will never impose herself on a guy if she is not sure that he has a feeling of love for her.

Often to a woman's question: "Why don't guys write first?" - there is a very simple answer that all people are different, including the representatives of the stronger sex. They are also afraid of being rejected, they can simply be shy, worry that they will look ridiculous. In general, guys have the right to experience all the same feelings as girls, but the main difference between them is that guys still have to make the first move.

Why don't guys text first after a meeting?

There can be a great many reasons, so a girl should not immediately get upset and even more so suffer because of this. The situation can be quite banal - the guy is busy with his studies or work, he is very tired and he does not have time to call the girl. The main difference between guys and girls is that he will not waste time on half-hour conversations. Men often prefer to finish their important business first, and then think about the girl, especially if you met recently. He considers himself a free man, so he does not think about the fact that he is obliged to call every few hours a girl with whom he recently went on a date.

Important rule

Dear girls, remember the main rule, if you charmed a guy, he liked him, he will definitely call you or write to you, if he loses his number, he will find another way to meet you. If he never gets in touch with you, then you are not the girl who suits him, he is also a person and has the right to choose. This does not mean at all that you are bad at something, no, just two certain people did not fit together. And there's nothing wrong with that, you shouldn't get hung up on it, and even more so worry about it. There will definitely be another young man who will not think about why the guy should write first, but just do it.

Why does the guy not write if you have known each other for a long time?

If you talked with a guy for a long time, everything went to the beginning of a serious relationship, and suddenly he suddenly stopped writing and calling, you should think about it. This may be a wake-up call about upcoming changes in your life. Why don't guys write first? Here are some reasons:

  • he met another girl, and she charmed him;
  • something bad happened to him;
  • he is very offended by you for something.

The last point can even be tweaked a little. Not offended, but angry or dissatisfied. Agree, with such an attitude, it is rare that guys will call themselves. Usually, at this moment, a girl begins to suspect her lover of treason, lack of love, which further aggravates the situation.

Should I write to the first guy in this case? If you think that you are to blame and should apologize, then be sure to write and call. Thus, you will not only save your relationship, but also make it clear to the guy that he is not indifferent to you, and you have tender feelings for him. Don't ask yourself why guys don't text first. Take the first step yourself. Believe me, he is waiting for your apology and loves you no less than you love him.

If you do not want to call, write him a message on a social network or SMS. This way you will be sure that he read it. If after that there is no reaction, then it is better not to take the initiative again. Don't lash out at the guy with an interrogation about where he's been and what he's been doing all this time. It's repulsive. Better try to make your relationship stronger and more tender after a quarrel. And then, as if by the way, you will find out what the young man has been doing all this time.

A few more reasons for the "silence" of the guys

Sometimes some guys deliberately do not write to her after meeting a girl in order to check her in this way. If a girl starts calling or writing too annoyingly, he won’t like it, he definitely won’t meet with such a girl.

Some young people simply do not like to correspond, they prefer a real meeting to this. Here's the answer to the question of why guys don't text first. If somehow you don’t like it, you will have to fight it with your feminine cunning and charm, apply some tricks. You can tell him that you are worried about him, worry and miss him, say that his message for you will be a very important event of the day. Should I write to the first guy? Costs!

Do not be offended by your boyfriend if he writes you in monosyllabic sentences, only on business. This is how male logic works, it is much easier for them to write “Everything is OK” than to paint how everything is fine. This is what distinguishes boys from girls. Don't be discouraged, text first if you're dating. Many young people tend to think that texting is a waste of time, and it is better to spend it with a girl in real life, rather than communicating virtually.

Here are the main reasons why guys don't write first. Good luck with your relationship!

Probably, every girl is familiar with the feeling of falling in love when a guy likes you so much that you constantly think about him, want to meet, dream. At such moments, the girl forgets about everything, her head is occupied with thoughts about the chosen one of the heart, she constantly talks only about him. It is during such a period that the fair sex becomes vulnerable, impressionable. Often they are visited by doubts: “does he like me”, “why doesn’t he call”, “why the guy doesn’t write”. We are all used to the fact that the first step, usually, should be taken by a man, so if a guy remains silent for too long, this is alarming. How to understand such a situation, what to do, and most importantly, to remain calm and

Write yourself or not?

Often a girl may be visited by the thought: “Should I write to a guy first?” - if he does not call or write at least one day. Or after the first meeting. Constant doubts and worries that maybe something is wrong gnaw at the girl. And she would be glad to take the initiative herself, but the girlish pride given by nature does not always allow this. She is afraid to be ridiculed, to get into a girl, it would be better to suffer, to torment herself with dull thoughts, but she will never impose herself on a guy if she is not sure that he has a feeling of love for her. Often to a woman's question: "Why don't guys write first?" - there is a very simple answer that all people are different, including the representatives of the stronger sex. They are also afraid of being rejected, they can simply be shy, worry that they will look ridiculous. In general, guys have the right to experience all the same feelings as girls, but the main difference between them is that guys still have to make the first move.

Why don't guys text first after a meeting?

There can be a great many reasons, so a girl should not immediately get upset and even more so suffer because of this. The situation can be quite banal - the guy is busy with his studies or work, he is very tired and he does not have time to call the girl. The main difference between guys and girls is that he will not waste time on half-hour conversations. Men often prefer to finish their important business first, and then think about the girl, especially if you met recently. He considers himself a free man, so he does not think that he is obliged to call every few hours a girl with whom he recently went on a date.

Other reasons

Another guy may not call because he lost the phone number of a new acquaintance, especially this could happen if he was written down on a piece of paper, and memory could fail. He could also lose his SIM card. Quite a life situation.

Important rule

Dear girls, remember the main rule, if you charmed a guy, he liked him, he will definitely call you or write to you, if he loses his number, he will find another way to meet you. If he never gets in touch with you, then you are not the girl who suits him, he is also a person and has the right to choose. This does not mean at all that you are bad at something, no, just two certain people did not fit. And there's nothing wrong with that, you shouldn't get hung up on it, and even more so worry about it. There will definitely be another young man who will not think about why the guy should write first, but just do it.

Why does the guy not write if you have known each other for a long time?

If you talked with a guy for a long time, everything went to the beginning of a serious relationship, and suddenly he suddenly stopped writing and calling, you should think about it. This may be a wake-up call about upcoming changes in your life. Why don't guys write first? Here are some reasons:

  • he met another girl, and she charmed him;
  • something bad happened to him;
  • he is very offended by you for something.

The last point can even be tweaked a little. Not offended, but angry or dissatisfied. Agree, with such an attitude, it is rare to call yourself. Usually, at this moment, a girl begins to suspect her lover of treason, lack of love, which further aggravates the situation.

Write or not?

Should I write to the first guy? If you think that you are guilty and should apologize, then be sure to write and call. Thus, you will not only save your relationship, but also make it clear to the guy that he is not indifferent to you, and you have tender feelings for him. Don't ask yourself why guys don't text first. Take the first step yourself. Believe me, he is waiting for your apology and loves you no less than you love him. If you do not want to call, write him a message on a social network or SMS. This way you will be sure that he read it. If after that there is no reaction, then it is better not to take the initiative again. Don't lash out at the guy with an interrogation about where he's been and what he's been doing all this time. It's repulsive. Better try to make your relationship stronger and more tender after a quarrel. And then, as if by the way, you will find out what the young man has been doing all this time.

A few more reasons for the "silence" of the guys

Sometimes some guys deliberately do not write to her after meeting a girl in order to check her in this way. If a girl starts calling or writing too annoyingly, he won’t like it, he definitely won’t meet with such a girl.

Some young people simply do not like to correspond, they prefer a real meeting to this. Here's the answer to the question of why guys don't text first. If somehow you don’t like it, you will have to fight it with your feminine cunning and charm, apply some tricks. You can tell him that you are worried about him, worry and miss him, say that his message for you will be a very important event of the day. Should I write to the first guy? Costs!

Do not be offended by your boyfriend if he writes you in monosyllabic sentences, only on business. So it is much easier for them to write “Everything is OK” than to paint how everything is fine. This is what distinguishes boys from girls. Don't be discouraged, text first if you're dating. Many young people tend to think that texting is a waste of time, and it's better to spend it with a girl in real life, rather than communicating virtually.

Here are the main reasons why guys don't write first. Good luck with your relationship!