What should parents do during children's tantrums. What to do when the baby is naughty. Causes of crying and useful tips Reasons for crying a newborn how to calm

After a year, babies become very capricious. At the same time, some check the boundaries of what is permitted, others assert their territory and power, others ... Every whim has a reason, but we cannot always detect and eliminate it in time. How to calm the child at such a moment? How to prevent endless whims in the future? The answer depends on each specific situation.

Caprice or hysteria?

So, the situation has already "taken place": the baby became capricious. He cries, gets angry, whines, throws toys, protests, and perhaps even bursts into tears, beats his head against the wall or floor, arches involuntarily. Parents have yet to figure out the reasons that cause such behavior of the baby (and it is always an expression of some of his inner suffering), and we will deal with this a little later.

Now the main thing is to correctly respond to children's tears and calm the baby.

To do this, it is important to distinguish between two concepts: whim and hysteria. By external manifestations, they may be similar:

the child cries a lot, does not calm down for a long time;
can scream loudly, attracting the attention of others;
often the baby falls to the floor and beats his head or legs on the floor;
does not listen to the admonitions of adults;
expresses a clear protest against all the actions of parents.

However, whim differs from hysteria in that in the second case, the baby loses control over his actions, can reach exhaustion, even convulsions. At this moment, he is not aware of his actions, his nervous system is not subject to him. During a tantrum, the child does not hear what adults are saying to him, and cannot respond to the words. As a rule, a tantrum begins with a slight whim, when the baby shows conscious disobedience, but gradually grows to an uncontrollable state.

We calm the capricious

At the first manifestations of whims, you need to try to divert the attention of the crumbs to something more interesting. At 2 years old, this technique is still quite effective. If this does not help, it is important for parents to remain calm and composure, not to show any reaction to what is happening (although sometimes it is oh so difficult). Otherwise, the hysteria will pass, and the child will have the feeling that with its help you can achieve what you want, because when he cries, but does not yet become hysterical, he carefully observes who has what kind of reaction his “concert” causes. If the mother survived, but the grandmother trembled, in the future the baby will assert itself at her expense.

A whim is much easier to prevent than to stop later. You can try to offer the baby an alternative to what made him whimper (we can’t buy you this airplane now, but we can assemble it at home from your designer), or cheer him up with an unexpected joke, a funny song. In general - switch. Sometimes calm after such measures comes quite quickly.

When the hysteria nevertheless began, there should not be any reaction (and even more negative) from the parents. Now their goal is to rid the diverging child from the audience. If the scene unfolded at home, you can just leave the baby alone for a while, going about your business. If in a crowded place - take him away from people. To calm the baby, who himself is not able to do this, you can put him face to face on his knees, shake, hug; At home, you can turn on the music, arrange a warm bath for the baby.

In any case, it will be possible to talk with the child about the problem only when he completely calms down and is ready to listen and respond.

You can not make attempts to stop the tantrum, shout at the child, threaten, ridicule him, tease, give in to him out of shame in front of others. All this will give the child an indisputable trump card: the performance works!

If, despite all the measures taken, tantrums are repeated, are stormy and protracted, it makes sense to show the baby to a neurologist.

For everyone to sleep well

Many children, after a year, begin to “bumble” before going to bed: they don’t want to interrupt the games, they don’t want to part with their relatives until the morning, they want to dictate their own rules, or they just got overexcited during the day, and now the nervous system cannot calm down.

In the first cases, all the same whims take place, in the latter - an overstrain of the baby's nervous system. But both inevitably lead to the fact that none of the family members can get enough sleep.

You can help your baby calm down before going to bed when overexcited by the following actions.

All moving, noisy games and entertainment must be stopped at least an hour and a half before bedtime.
Evening bathing should take place without any games and toys, in warmer water than usual.
Relaxation will help light stroking massage (about 10-15 minutes).
Adding soothing herbs (succession, lavender) to bath water is good for calming children at night. You can put a bag with such herbs next to the crumbs on the bed or brew him a children's soothing tea.
Compliance with the regimen, when laying down occurs strictly at a certain time, also helps the nervous system to rebuild in time and better cope with emotional stress.
For the same purpose, it is important to always follow the established rituals before going to bed.
You can tell your baby a calm fairy tale or sing a lullaby - a monotonous voice will help him calm down and relax.
One of the best "soothing" for toddlers are mother's smell, heartbeat, the feeling of her closeness; therefore, you can, for example, put a baby’s crib next to an adult, or allow him to take his mother’s thing with him to the crib, a toy made by his mother’s hands or bought by her.
If the evening whims, despite all the measures, still remain a system, you can shift the child’s bedtime by 30-40 minutes - perhaps he just needs to fall asleep a little earlier. This is especially true if every day by the time of laying down the baby shows clear signs of fatigue.

We find out the reasons

When the child completely calms down, you need to calmly and on an equal footing discuss what happened with him. Not scolding, accusing or threatening - after all, the baby was naughty due to the fact that his nervous system was already so bad - but trying to find out what caused the "mutiny on the ship."

The child is still quite small to tell himself clearly and sensibly what is happening. Therefore, show maximum participation, ask in detail, asking many leading questions. Formulate them so that the baby can understand you: do you feel resentment? you're scared? Why? do you have any pain?..

What can cause tantrums?

Physical suffering. The kid is tired, wants to eat, sleep, is overexcited, something hurts him. He himself cannot formulate this yet, and the nervous system is looking for a way to unload.
Attention deficit. For example, they play and communicate little with the baby (parents are busy at work or around the house), he feels unnecessary, unloved and abandoned. This can happen even after an illness, if during the illness he was given maximum attention, everyone jumped in front of him “on their hind legs”, trying to fulfill any whim, if only it would be easier for him. And now he wants to "continue the banquet."
Desire to manipulate elders. This is a direct manifestation of the crisis of the first year of life. The kid seeks to win respect, to force adults to obey themselves, to probe the boundaries of what is permitted. And sometimes the abuse of the attention of adults is caused in the crumbs by an excessive manifestation of the love of others for him.
Revolt against overprotection. It is important for a kid at this age to establish himself as an independent person. And when his hands are constantly “tied” with total bans, this causes a natural reaction - to do it out of spite.
The desire to achieve something very important, which parents refuse for reasons that are still difficult for the child to understand (they don’t buy a toy or sweets, they don’t let them go out, etc.).
Nervous situation in the family: constant scandals, screams, tears, perhaps even violence. In this case, the baby's nervous system is constantly under tremendous stress. The whole world seems to him evil, set against him - so unnecessary and poor. And the best defense, as you know, is an attack, the accessible form of which for a small child is hysteria. In fact, this is an SOS signal!

How to avoid problems in the future?

To correct the situation, it is not enough just to find out what caused the riot. It is important to take steps to prevent it from happening again. And here, sometimes just “one fad” is not enough - you will have to reconsider a lot in the family structure, upbringing methods, behavior, etc. The tips below will help parents with this.

Spend as much time with your child as possible. And not just "close". Treat him as an equal and show your respect for his personality and needs. Connect to your adult affairs, let him decide what to do with you. So the baby will learn democratic behavior, the ability to find compromises. Play with him more often: in games, the child always feels in charge, so they strengthen his sense of self-worth in the family.
Do not be afraid to express your love for the baby: words, hugs, care, attention. It is very important for him to feel significant, loved, good for you. The child needs it for full mental and physical development. Do not think that this is how you raise a sissy. On the contrary: a self-confident, self-sufficient, caring, balanced person.
Think carefully about the atmosphere surrounding the child. Constant conflicts, aggression, scenes of cruelty (not even in your family, but somewhere in the yard) - all this can unsettle the baby. Especially if he has an unstable nervous system and he is very impressionable. Change the situation if possible.
Show your child equality. From time to time, change roles with the baby: play in the family, but take on the role of a child, and give him the role of an adult. What will happen? The baby will show you your behavior towards him: your manner of upbringing, intonation, system of prohibitions, etc. A very useful activity for an adult is to see yourself through the eyes of your own child.
Develop a unified system of prohibitions in the family: what dad does not allow, neither mom nor grandmother will allow. This will not give the child room for "psychological experiments." At the same time, the prohibitions should have an understandable causal relationship for the crumbs (this cannot be done, because you will hurt yourself), which does not confirm your totalitarian authority (I said no!), but gives the child an idea of the framework of reasonable and safe. In addition, it is always important that the ban has an alternative: this is impossible, but something is possible. The child must feel that his opinion is taken into account, he is given freedom of choice.

The most important remedy for many children's troubles is mutual understanding with parents. If a trusting relationship can be built, calming down the baby will not be a problem, and he will not have to be capricious. After all, there is nothing to achieve. He is already loved, understood, appreciated, supported, listened to his desires, respected as a person - with his needs and difficulties.

Democratic relations, the ability to build a constructive dialogue with a child and find a compromise is not an easy science. But it gives the child the main feelings in his life. He is needed. His opinion is important. He is good. Does it make sense for such a child to hysteria endlessly?

The crying of an infant is always associated with key stimuli and needs, so the following can be noted among the main reasons for crying:

hunger;
thirst;
desire to attract attention;
pain;
discomfort;
fear;
overwork;
hypothermia;
overheat.

At the first stages, mom still does not know how to determine by the nature of crying what exactly a small child needs. However, in the process of habituation, different types of crying become recognizable, since the intonation, loudness and duration in each case differ from each other.

Video - How to calm the baby

Most often, a child cries because of hunger, pain or fear. In such situations, the newborn cries most loudly, invitingly and angrily. Characteristic signs will help to recognize which of the listed reasons is bothering the baby at this moment.

Hungry crying is often very loud, prolonged and intense. Over time, the little one begins to seem to choke. In such a situation, the child will begin to intuitively look for the breast immediately after he is in the arms of his mother.
Crying in pain, very mournful and somewhat desperate. However, if the child felt a sharp and sudden pain, then the screams will be loud, and the crying will be flooded.
Crying from fear, as a rule, has notes of hysteria. It starts abruptly and ends abruptly. In such a situation, it is very important to quickly calm the child and not wait until he calms down on his own. This contributes to the emergence of additional trust between the baby and mommy.

Often the baby cries when it freezes or overheats. In this case, it is very simple to determine the cause, since the skin is either very hot or supercooled. Mom can easily determine this by touch.

Sometimes the baby cries from fatigue and then you should not try to entertain him with rattles and funny faces. The baby just wants to sleep.

Reasons for crying in your sleep

Sometimes a child starts crying in his sleep for no reason. Experts are sure that this is always due to one of the following reasons:

hunger;
horrible dream;
uncomfortable posture;
pain;
desire for mother's attention.

Basic Ways to Soothe a Crying Baby

Regardless of the nature of crying and its causes, there are several universal ways that will help a young mother calm her baby.

Method 1

One of the most common ways is swaddling. Do not confuse diapers with straitjackets, because, unlike this “form of clothing”, diapers warm the baby and allow him to take a comfortable position. In addition, wrapped in diapers, the baby again remembers his mother's womb, where he spent so much time. The most important question to be solved in such a situation is how much to swaddle a little one. Experts recommend tightening the diaper tight enough, but the child should not be completely constrained in movements.

Method 2

Another option is to put the child on his knees along the legs. Most often, the baby is comfortably settled in a warm and comfortable recess.

Method 3

One of the strongest instincts in nursing babies is the instinct to suck. Knowing this fact allows you to quickly calm the baby. As soon as the baby starts crying, give him a pacifier. Within minutes, the baby should calm down. Specialists conducted a study, the results of which showed that a pacifier can protect against sudden infant death syndrome, which terrifies all mothers without exception.

Method 4

This method is associated with sounds, since some babies very often need unobtrusive noise. The fact is that, being in the mother's tummy, the baby is used to hearing different sounds: from the physiological processes occurring in the woman's body, to the noise that surrounded her in real life. If you create a similar atmosphere for a toddler, he will feel in a familiar environment and quickly calm down.

You can turn on pleasant calm music or TV - it does not matter. The main thing is to adjust the volume correctly so that the baby is comfortable. You can remember what exactly you watched or listened to while you were pregnant in order to recreate those times for the baby as much as possible.

Method 5

This is one of the simplest and most popular methods that have been helping young mothers for many years now. Taking a crying child in your arms, you need to quietly and penetratingly pronounce the sound “shhhhh”. Gentle intonation and lulling noise will help the child to calm down. According to the pediatrician, you need to “shush” loudly enough. Otherwise, the baby simply will not hear you because of his crying.

Method 6

You can soothe your child with simple conversation. If the baby is worried and crying, then start saying some pleasant words to him, looking into his eyes. In this way, you can let your baby know that you are there and can protect him from any troubles. The peanut should feel support and care, so it is better to accompany any action with a conversation.

Method 7

It is very important to keep the baby moving. The fact is that while in the mother's womb, the child gets used to constantly moving, because there the baby swims or bounces along with her mother's movements. You can try to recreate the same environment, as it helps the baby calm down and fall asleep faster.

You can try to rock the baby on the handles or use auxiliary items, such as a chaise longue chair or a cradle. If they are not there, then the chair with the baby can be placed on any vibrating surface. But at the same time, it is very important not to leave the child unattended, as this can be dangerous.

Method 8

With her hands, mom is able to relieve any pain. For infants, the touch of their parents is especially important. To calm the child, you can give him a light massage:

undress the little one and put it on the back;
slowly stroke the legs and arms of the crumbs, linger on the tummy;
turn the baby on his stomach and massage the back in circular motions;
don't forget to say sweet words or softly sing your favorite tune.

Such actions will distract the baby and quickly calm them down.

Method 9

In most cases, babies cry because of colic in the tummy. Their cause is bottle feeding, because in the process the baby inadvertently swallows air, which puts pressure on the baby's stomach. In order to avoid such unpleasant situations, it is recommended to purchase an anti-colic bottle, which was designed specifically for this purpose. The creators of the anti-colic bottle made sure that it does not form a vacuum. As a result, the baby may not come off the container.

Let's return to the issue of colic. From the fact that a small child cries, he swallows even more air, which aggravates the pain. Consequently, there will be more gas, which means more crying. It is necessary, if not to prevent the ingress of air, then at least to help get rid of it. Most often this is done with regurgitation. To do this, you need to perform the following steps:

gently pat on the back;
hold the "column" at the shoulder.

Method 12

However, the reason for crying may be external discomfort, not internal. The first step is to check the baby's diaper, and then see if the baby is overheated (or overcooled). To do this, feel the arms, legs, neck and nose of the baby. If everything is in order, then you should give the baby water - maybe he is just thirsty.

It makes sense to put other clothes on the little one or change the lighting in the room. One of these actions will help eliminate the discontent of the baby.

Method 13

The main thing is to distract the child from crying. To do this, you can use absolutely any means - rustle, call, sing, shake rattles, turn on ringtones on your mobile phone. The kid should notice something that will attract his attention.

Method 14

Toward evening, the likelihood of colic in an infant increases, especially in those who are breastfeeding. The reason for this is the constant change in the composition of milk: in the evening, the concentration of fats and hormones changes. There is an old grandfather's method - dill water, which is given to the baby during meals. You can also buy a special tool in pharmacies.

It must be understood that in a situation where none of the above methods helps, there is nothing left but to contact a pediatrician. The doctor must make sure that nothing threatens the health of the baby.

Be healthy!

Video - How to calm a crying baby

A sleeping baby is a magical sight, akin to a miracle. And this picture seems especially implausible to those exhausted parents whose babies cry for no apparent reason, arching and screaming non-stop 24 hours a day. Do not despair! And don't beat yourself up - you're not a bad parent! You simply do not know the ways that can rock even the most capricious child without depriving his mom and dad of mental clarity, self-control and a sense of parental happiness. We will teach you how to properly soothe your baby.

From the very first words, it is worth noting that all the tips below on how to calm a crying baby (namely, a baby between the ages of 0 and six months) refer to those cases when the baby cries and screams “for no apparent reason” - that is, his tummy does not hurt (not swollen, not tight, well palpable), he is not hungry, not cold and does not need a diaper change. Rather, these tips are for those tired and exhausted parents in whose eyes the question is read: “How to calm a child who just likes to cry and yell?!”.

How to soothe a 0-3 month old baby? Get in his position!

One of the world's most competent experts in the field of baby crying is an American doctor, professor of child psychiatry, pediatrician Harvey Karp. For over 20 years, he has been teaching young parents effective ways to quickly soothe a crying infant. Dr. Harp's book on these methods has long been the undisputed bestseller in its segment. On the one hand, these methods are extremely simple, judge for yourself:

swaddling;
holding in a position on the side;
"white noise" or hiss;
rhythmic swing;
sucking.

But refrain from surprise and doubt until you have tried all five methods in action. What is the essence of this technique? In his book, Dr. Harvey uses such an ambiguous concept in relation to newborn children aged 0 to 3 months, as " fourth trimester of pregnancy».

During this period of life, babies are in dire need of conditions that would closely replicate the intrauterine environment of the mother. It is in such conditions that babies instantly calm down, instinctively gaining a sense of familiar comfort and safety.

Actually, on this principle, Dr. Karp built his methodology. For example, the tight swaddling of a newborn imitates his presence in the mother's uterus in the last stages of pregnancy, where the baby is already quite crowded. The position on the side is also the most familiar for him. Hissing sounds are the most familiar to the baby, because being in the womb, he constantly hears the mother's breathing and the passage of fluids through her intestines. The unborn baby experiences monotonous motion sickness (almost shaking) all the time when his mother moves. And if you look at the ultrasound images, then make sure that starting from the 24th week, while in the mother's womb, the child reflexively sucks his thumb almost all the time.

Here is the nature of the origin of all five ways of effective motion sickness according to Harvey Karp.

And if you learn, using the tips of Dr. Karp, to imitate for your baby all these states that are most comfortable for him in the first months of life, then you will not have problems with how to calm the child. So:

5 magical ways Harvey Karp, or How to calm a child:

Method 1: Swaddling. Of course, keeping a newborn tightly wrapped in diapers is not worth it all the time. But if the baby is worried and cannot fall asleep for a long time, sometimes it is enough just to wrap it tightly in a sheet or diaper (you need to swaddle it with the handles) so that the baby immediately calms down.

If your baby is often restless and has difficulty falling asleep, it makes sense to buy modern diapers that even dads can use without difficulty.

Method 2: Position on the side. Place the child on your arm or on your knees on the side so that it seems to fall a little on the stomach. Gently support the baby's head. This position can also be used if the child suffers from minor colic.

Method 3: Rhythmic rocking (shaking). Holding the baby in the position on his side, start not hard, but rock him rhythmically from side to side. This method can be immediately combined with the following - with imitation of hissing sounds.

See clearly how to properly hold the baby on its side and rock it:

Method 4: "White noise". The point is to play monotonous hissing sounds right above the baby's ear. This is perhaps the most unusual of all Dr. Karp's methods of calming a child, but it works excellently.

Method 5: Sucking. The pacifier is an excellent all-round sedative for the baby. With the same success, you can attach the baby to the breast (if you are a nursing mother) or give a bottle with a small amount of mixture.

In Harvey Karp's own experience, sometimes one or two of the tricks on this list are enough to stop a newborn from crying and worrying. But often you have to use consistently and all five methods. However, according to the doctor, these simple methods, together or separately, help in almost 100 percent of cases.

Agree - this is literally a "gift from heaven" for those exhausted parents who, because of the constant crying of children, are, figuratively speaking, one step away from suicide ...

4 Ways to Calm a Baby Over 3 Months Old

Dr. Harvey Karp's methods are good, but it's worth reiterating - almost all of them are only suitable for newborn babies. If you try to swaddle or “hiss” a six-month-old crying toddler, you are unlikely to succeed. Other ways to calm older children can be tried. Moreover, in this case, the expression "how to calm a child" will not always be equal to the expression "how to rock a baby." To calm means, first of all, to distract from screams and sobs.

Method 1: Wear in a sling. Wearing in a sling, by the way, combines two of the items proposed by Dr. Harvey at once: motion sickness and swaddling, and if you add “white noise” to this list, for example, go outside with a baby, it will immediately become clear why kids love slings so much. And if swaddling is only suitable for newborns, then from time to time you can wear a baby in a sling as long as you can comfortably carry (literally) the weight of your baby.

Method 2: Switch attention. Children older than 3 months already quite successfully and for a long time fix their attention on objects and sounds - they are especially attracted to bright colors and clear, loud sounds. Rustle bright paper or a bag, ring a bell, let you watch any commercial on TV. All these manipulations (especially the last one!) instantly capture the attention of the crumbs: he is distracted from the hysteria, begins to show interest and gradually calms down, calms down.

Method 3: Let the excess air out. When crying, the child swallows a lot of air, which gives him very unpleasant sensations. Thus, the hysteria runs the risk of closing in a circle: the baby cries, swallowing excess air, from which his tummy starts to hurt and he cries even more than before, swallowing air again and again. Therefore, as soon as the child begins to show anxiety or scream, take him in your arms and hold him in a column for a while - having burped out excess air, the baby is likely to calm down. And if not, use the previous method by trying to attract his attention with a bright toy or unusual sounds.

Method 4: Dance together. It may seem strange, but it is the smooth dance moves that can help you solve the problem of how to calm a crying baby. Take the baby in your arms, smile at him, talk to him in a soothing tone and move around a little - rocking him from side to side, up and down, singing a simple melody. When the baby stops crying, put him to the breast for a while (if the baby is bottle-fed, give a bottle of water) or give a pacifier. Most of the time it works!

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They fed, reviled the column, changed the diaper, gave a remedy for colic, massaged the tummy, applied a heating pad, shook it on the handles, offered a pacifier, sang lullabies, and your baby continues to cry? If you are convinced that the child is full, he is not cold and not hot, his tummy does not hurt, then it's time to look for other methods of calming.

website knows how difficult it is for modern parents to navigate the sea of conflicting information that is full of the Internet, and therefore he has collected for you proven methods of calming babies from famous pediatricians and unknown, but smart parents.

Hamilton support

Paediatrician with 30 years of experience, Robert Hamilton, has developed a simple and effective method that works best for babies up to 3 months, that is, just at the age when the baby is worried about colic. Nobody forbids using this method further, it will just be more difficult to hold it with the growing weight of the child.

The method is quite simple: you need to cross the arms of the baby on the chest, clasp your hand on top, and lift the baby with the other, placing your hand between the legs. In this position, the baby needs to be gently rocked up and down or from side to side - and he will quickly calm down. Don't believe? look video.

Harvey Karp Method

Pediatrician Harvey Karp bases his method of soothing babies on recreating for the baby the sensations it experienced in the womb. The technique includes 5 steps:

Swaddling, because the womb was crowded.
Laying the baby on his side or on his tummy on his arm.
The sound of "shhh" or white noise.
The slight up and down rocking he felt in his stomach as his mother walked.
Sucking is optional, but desirable.

White noise and more

When an adult turns on the sound of white noise, it is difficult for him to imagine how one can fall asleep under this. But in fact, white noise itself, and any monotonous hissing sounds really have a calming effect and help you fall asleep.

You can play the “shhh” sound yourself or look for options in special applications: the sounds of a hair dryer, vacuum cleaner, washing machine, fan, waterfall, and even a train work great.

Soothing foot massage

Children can get into a state of psychological arousal, so all parents should know how to calm a child during a tantrum. During such periods, babies lose their self-control, begin to scream, cry, bite, fight in mental fits. Adults need to determine the causes of such an excited state, and know how to neutralize it.

A parent cannot always satisfy the desires of a child when he is already beginning to understand the world around him, attract attention to himself, and also annoy adults. There are several reasons for such a nervous state:

It is important to understand how to calm the baby when he has such attacks. If you react incorrectly to such moments, then the child throws tantrums every day for a long time.

How to understand a child who is not yet able to speak?

All novice parents regret that the instruction in the manufacturer's language is not attached to the newborn.

In fact, crying is a kind of language of communication between the baby and the world, because it can be very diverse. Over time, each parent begins to distinguish the intonations with which the baby tries to convey information about what is bothering him. But even if this is a problem, the very presence of crying already says a lot.

When breastfeeding, the baby always responds well to feeding if everything is in order. If he cries and refuses to eat, something definitely hurts him. Maybe it's stomach cramps.

If the cry slowly increases from quiet to loud and demanding, the baby is probably hungry. And if mom also disappeared somewhere, then crying takes on intonations of resentment and despair.

If the crying is not too active, but restless, this usually indicates discomfort. You may need a diaper change. In fact, a baby can scream without a good reason, simply because he is bored, but then it’s not crying, but a cry, usually intermittent and loud, like a call to pay attention to him.

Over time, the little one learns to let his parents know what he needs, so in a few months any mother will become an expert in the types of children's screams, cries that express the whole gamut of human feelings and will know exactly how to calm a newborn baby during a tantrum..

Well, a one-year-old baby is already on the verge of learning the language of his parents.

How is hysteria different from whims

It is important to understand the difference between an excited state and children's whims. In the latter case, the baby is trying to get the forbidden or desired. This leads to the fact that he starts screaming, stomping his feet. That is, he deliberately annoys parents.

But hysteria is involuntary behavior. Children are not able to control their emotions and physical manifestations. There may be convulsions that need to be urgently stopped.

Stages of nervous excitement

Experts note three stages of seizures. It is important to note that ignoring the child can lead to the termination of the excited state.

It should be noted that the causes and condition of the child during a tantrum may differ, it all depends on the type of nervous system.

Hysteria at 2 years of age

Since the baby's emotional system is still underdeveloped, hysterical behavior is the norm, experts say. At this age, the little one already understands the meaning of the words “no”, “no”, “I don’t want to”. With hysterics, he expresses his dissatisfaction with the rules or requests of his parents.

Some parents fulfill all the requirements of the child to calm him down, others ignore, and still others use physical force. To avoid negative consequences, it is necessary to know which reaction is correct.

If it was not possible to stop the attack at the initial stage, you should not scold the baby, and even more so beat, as this will lead to greater excitement. With regular concessions, the little one will quickly learn that adults will always comply with his demands if he starts crying, and will use such methods on a regular basis.

But hitting children in such a state is also impossible. The best option is to ignore the hysterical behavior. The child will understand that his cries and crying do not lead to the desired effect.

During such periods, it is best to hug the baby, say a few gentle words. It is necessary to make him understand that it is impossible and impossible to manipulate adults.

In public places, children try to attract strangers with their behavior so that mom and dad make concessions to him. But it is not recommended to succumb to provocations, otherwise he will always demand to buy the thing he likes. You should not pay attention to the sidelong glances of outsiders who may condemn you and your baby's behavior.

It is enough to wait a little while the little one calms down, after which, calmly talk to him, be sure to find out the cause of the tantrum. This reaction allows you to achieve the desired result.

Nervous state at 3 years of age

At this age, the child's nervous behavior is pronounced. He begins to understand the world around him and learns to express his stubbornness. Experts note that during this period, the baby begins a crisis, and behavior can change every few hours.

The child is trying to anger adults and get away from all compromises. He wants to show his independence. This behavior takes new parents by surprise.

Psychologists say that you do not need to scold the baby so as not to focus his attention on bad moments. The best thing to do is switch his attention. But at the peak of hysterical behavior, this approach is ineffective, since the children's emotions are no longer controlled.

At home, it is recommended to endure screams for a while until the baby calms down, then talk to him, find out the reasons for this behavior. In public places, it is better to take him to where there are fewer people. This will lead to the fact that a small person will be less likely to experience nervous excitement.

Hysteria at 4 years of age

If children continue to scream and cry regularly, then parents should be wary, as this may be the result of improper upbringing. This is how spoiled children often behave - they can be distinguished by the tantrums that accompany any refusal and prohibition. For example, you told your son or daughter that it's time to turn off the cartoons. A well-bred child at this age will protest with words, try to negotiate, and a hysterical one will immediately burst into tears, smashing furniture and walls, screaming. He must understand what is allowed and what is forbidden, otherwise he will achieve what he wants with tears.

Psychologists note that it is required to consult a specialist, with pronounced symptoms:

frequent bouts of arousal at the psychological level;
aggressiveness;
intermittent breathing;
loss of consciousness;
begins to cause physical damage to people around;
older children are susceptible to hysteria;
the appearance of nightmares;
chronic fatigue and lethargy;

Neurologists, psychologists will help to cope with such a disease and improve family relationships. To avoid such consequences, it is necessary to take seriously the upbringing of the baby from a young age.

How to calm a child

Initially, adults must decide on the cause, which depends on many factors. During an attack, certain measures must be taken.

The main way out of the situation is the correct response to mental arousal. If the seizures do not go away for a long time, then you should definitely seek medical help.

Parents share experiences

Violet

“We had problems in the family when our second daughter was born. The eldest daughter was two years old, and I have huge to-do lists, plus a nursing baby in my arms. At first she was interested, but then she began to get nervous and throw tantrums over trifles, sometimes for no reason at all. I didn’t even think that such small children could be jealous. I had to take immediate action. For example, I feed the younger one, while I plant the older one nearby. I started talking to her actively, explaining that the baby is very small, she needs our help. As a result, she received an assistant in the face of her eldest daughter, who will give a diaper and a towel, and informs when the baby wakes up. I try to tell the eldest more often how she helps me, my daughter immediately blooms and calms down.

Mom Elena

“I have a problem with dressing. Now my son is in his second year, but we do not like to dress from birth. I tried to stop to play and then continue to dress - it only gets worse. Now I try to do everything quickly, through “I don’t want to”, and then go out into the street. And already there, either he himself is distracted, or I occupy him with something.

Adele

“My daughter is 3.5 years old. One day she woke up in the middle of the night in hysterics. Apparently something had a dream, but at first I was afraid that something hurt her. She sobbed terribly. I rushed to feel sorry for her, to reassure her, I understand that the child is hysterical, but I don’t know what to do. She took me to bed. Then she barely returned. She liked being with me, and as soon as I start to shift it, tears begin. And so for two weeks I struggled with her desire to sleep with me. I sat near her bed and explained that the children should sleep separately, that I love her and do not leave her.

Victoria Fedorova, a child psychologist, shares tips on how to deal with whims and tantrums, and how to comfort a baby when it hurts.

First of all, parents should understand that tantrums are an integral part of growing up a little person, no matter how hard you try, they cannot be completely avoided. If a child is hysterical, there is no need to make a tragedy out of this: an excess of emotions is simply obliged to find a way out.

A whim is a desire to get what adults do not consider it necessary to give him.From the point of view of the parent, the subject of the conflict can be harmful, unnecessary, dangerous, distracting, uncomfortable, untimely, and the like.

But you need to understand that if today you forbade your son or daughter some trifle, and then after screaming and crying you allowed it, then you will continue to receive the same thing incrementally. Only next time he may need something really impossible, and the conflict that you get will, like circles on the water, become more and more. The logic that the child argues will suggest that since you still have not agreed, it means that he is not yet loudly and actively crying and rolling on the floor.Therefore, all parents should remember that the main thing in their behavior is the sequence of actions.

As Dr. Komarovsky said: "If something is impossible today, then it is impossible tomorrow, and with mom, and dad, and grandma."It is important to have a dialogue with children, to discuss what is possible, what is not and why, to explain their actions.Maybe we should not ban something that is not important for adults, but the structure of the bans should be transparent and understandable. When he is clearly aware that whims will not bring the desired result, then he will not start.

When a child is in pain, there is no time for an educational moment. It is necessary to take all measures to reduce pain to a minimum, and then tightly engage in his consciousness.

If the pain is not too long-term, for example, the little one scratched his knee, and you treated the wound, take pity on the baby, let him know that you love him very much. Talk a lot and interestingly, because this is how you divert his attention, and he stops listening to sensations. It would be nice to find an interesting joint activity, in order to be distracted, if possible, you need to fill in the visual range of the child: read a picture book, you can draw, play quiet games, cartoons are also suitable, many children love music. Do something with him that interests him. This is the case when you need to show maximum attention and participation.

If the child is worried about long-term pain, then the same thing should be done, but alternately (if the causes of pain cannot be temporarily eliminated). The presence and participation of loved ones is very important for babies at any age.

Babies also suffer from pain, such as abdominal cramps. Usually during this period, the baby is carried in their arms and warmed with living warmth, pumped, worn in slings.

Prevention

Absolutely all parents face nervous attacks of their children. To avoid negative consequences, you need to know how to stop a tantrum in a child and take preventive measures.

This is a difficult task for all parents. The main thing is to keep calm. If the psyche can no longer stand it, then you need to take a deep breath, and go out for a few minutes in order to lose the baby from sight. After an attack, you need to behave naturally, and not show him that he behaved badly. After a couple of weeks of such preventive measures, the attacks should be reduced.

If nothing helps to achieve a positive effect, then it is recommended to contact the clinic, where they will conduct a professional examination, thanks to which, specialists will determine the cause and help solve problems. Sometimes medication is required.

Folk remedies

It is important to note that only a doctor can prescribe treatment, but he may recommend taking natural sedatives. They are herbal based. Fees help to deal with the problem for a while. In addition, such methods are recommended by specialists for children with an excited nervous system. The prepared products are light, so they will not harm the health of the baby.

It is recommended to consult a medical professional as children may have allergic reactions to certain herbs. Also, certain fees are contraindicated in certain diseases. This must be taken into account and not self-medicate. Below you can find recipes for remedies that are given as examples. The necessary herbs are sold at any pharmacy kiosk.

Herbal tea for young children. It is necessary to make a collection of wheatgrass, marshmallow, chamomile and licorice, fennel in the ratio: 2:1:2:2:1. Pour 2 tablespoons of the collection with 1 cup of boiling water, then boil over high heat for about 20 minutes. The infusion must be filtered. Take the remedy in a warm form, three times a day before meals. The duration of the course is about 3 weeks. The product can be used at the age of more than 1 year, without allergies to herbs.
In the same dosage, motherwort infusion is allowed.
If the infant begins to behave irritably, then it should be bathed in a bath with the addition of coniferous extract. The course of therapy lasts 3 weeks.
Without the appointment of a pediatrician and other doctors, it is allowed to take homeopathic preparations or which include the amino acids of glycine.
As prescribed by the doctor, it is recommended to give the baby vitamin complexes, the dose of which must be strictly observed. Otherwise, it can lead to hypervitaminosis. Its consequences also negatively affect the condition of the baby.

It is important to understand that when taking any medicinal and natural remedies, it is required to observe the duration of the course. Stronger funds should not be given to the child on their own, otherwise it can lead to serious consequences.

Hysteria in a child is normal, but with frequent attacks, you need to be alert. The reason may be improper upbringing of children, violation of the daily routine, as well as some diseases. If you can’t deal with such a problem on your own, you don’t need to let it take its course. It is necessary to immediately contact a children's specialist who will help establish family relationships.