How to respond to nice words. The correct reaction to the compliments of men

All women, from time to time, hear compliments addressed to them. Some compliments are from the heart, sincere, others are banal flattery and sycophancy, others are from timid admirers, others are cheeky and shameless, etc. The reaction of the weaker sex to compliments depends not only on the emotional message of the “flatterer”, but also on the inner woman's attitude.

What should be the woman's response to a compliment, and what are our mistakes?

Common mistakes women make in response to compliments - learning to manage emotions!

Each lady has her own reaction to praise - embarrassment, indignation, confusion, etc. We, women, react to compliments because of our upbringing, character and other factors but the main thing is not to make mistakes in this matter.

Namely…

Don't mind
If you have been given a compliment, you should not immediately stop the galloping horse, saying, “It seemed to you!”, “There are better!” or “What nonsense! You might think I haven’t seen myself in the mirror since morning!” By this you belittle yourself, your talents, your dignity. Moreover, with such a reaction you will not raise yourself at all in the eyes of a man, and even, on the contrary, confuse him.
Don't make excuses
Your beautiful dress, great figure, unearthly eyes and all the ammunition of talents are a reason for pride, not shame. You don’t need to tell right away that you spent a lot of time in the solarium on this tan, that the breathtaking smoothness of your legs cost you six months of sessions in the salon, and this amazing handbag is generally second-hand. If you don't respect yourself, don't expect others to respect you.
Don't Ignore Compliments
You should not defiantly turn away with a contemptuous mine and show the world your cosmic inaccessibility, even if you are extremely embarrassed and dream of falling through a beautiful tile in a store. It's just ugly, uncivilized and does not paint a woman at all. Of course, we are talking about normal men with normal compliments, and not about “Hey dude, where did you get such crooked tights?” from the company of gopniks from the local bench, or about “Madame, you are so chic that you could add 10 rubles to me for a beer?” from a misguided "ghost of communism" with a pair of lanterns on his face. For a normal man, your behavior will hurt, offend, or simply cause rejection. If you already have children, you probably know that ignoring is the most terrible reaction.
Don't show disdain
Even in the unpleasant cases described above. Be above the behavior of that woman who arrogantly folds her lips in a bow and, twitching her nostrils, looks disgustedly through a person.
If you have been complimented, do not jump for joy, clap your hands, throw yourself on the neck of the “flatterer” and express delight in other overly emotional ways
This is an extreme. The thrown phrase "How beautiful you are!" (for example) also does not mean that now you owe this person anything or are obliged, at a minimum, to give a return compliment. You don't owe anything to anyone. Marked your beauty, talent, action? "Thank you," and "Ran to live on." The more confusion in response to praise, the greater your unreasonable "sense of duty", the brighter the emotions from (most often) meaningless words - the more vulnerable you are to manipulating you for the purposes of men. And these goals, as a rule, are far from a stamp in your passport and a villa for you in the Caribbean.

Reasons that do not allow a woman to respond beautifully and correctly to a compliment

There are no accidents in our world. Everything is interconnected, and everything has its cause and effect. No exception - and the reaction of a woman to compliments.

Why we fail to respond appropriately to praise , and what is the reason for embarrassment, irritation or desire to "send him with compliments to the bath"?

Rejection of a person
The very first and main reason. A person is simply not pleasant, frankly unpleasant, or he is simply unfamiliar to you, and your mother taught you not to respond to “shameless” compliments of beautiful and brutal strangers (according to the “Wolf and Little Red Riding Hood” principle).
Low self-esteem
The second most common reason. For some reason, you are sure (or someone assured you, “hammered”, forced you to accept it as a fact) that you are terrible, your legs are not at all like those of Cameron Diaz, and the place from which they grow is wrong. And the hands - so generally nailed to the wrong place, and even the sky has deprived of talents. Why did you decide that you do not deserve a compliment? Why do you think that with some Jennifer Lopez and did not stand next to each other? Yes, she has an insured body part that has been salivated by men from all over the world for many years, but not a single “priest”, even the most insured one, can resist the influence of pregnancy, time and old age. Especially since the smell of your borscht alone causes men to march in formation, as if hypnotized, and, barely noticing your stunning smile, they fall in piles. Spit on your prejudices and complexes and start to respect yourself already. And love.
Embarrassment and guilt
Repetition is the mother of learning: if your merits are recognized, this does not mean that others live in a world of illusions or do not know you well. This means that your talent (appearance, beauty, etc.) is appreciated. Except when you are outright lying, and you understand it. “You to me - I to you” in the case of compliments will be similar to “the cockerel praises the cuckoo”. Be natural and learn to accept compliments in a feminine way - a little condescendingly, with a half smile, and immediately throwing them out of your head.
Heightened self-esteem
Another extreme. Women in this category are usually offended that they were not praised enough or not at all. Or only “tops” were spotted, while the “roots” are worth closer attention and praise. In this situation, there is only one advice - look at yourself from the outside and start correcting your self-esteem. Hypertrophied self-love is called selfishness.
pathological suspiciousness
Of course, if at 2 o’clock in the morning, returning from guests, you suddenly hear a menacing thing from the bushes - “You are my charm!”, Then you should not think “how to answer him ...” - spray a scoundrel in the face from a gas spray (or deodorant) , knee at the causal place and run as fast as you can. But in every man who compliments you, to see a scoundrel, a maniac and just a self-serving type is the path to a psychologist (if not a psychiatrist). Because the attitudes “The world is evil”, “All men are theirs ...”, “Yeah, I got a compliment again, so I attract too much attention, it’s time to put on a veil and a burlap dress” or “I am a nonentity, and unworthy praise" - initially come from problems in the internal psychological balance. Caution is good, intuition is even better, unreasonable chronic suspicion of everyone is a pathology. It's impossible to be happy with such attitudes.

How to correctly respond to a compliment from a man - instructions for self-respecting women

You've been complimented. How to react, what to answer? Rejoice, blush or run without looking back?

To get started - turn on your intuition
She rarely fails a woman. If you feel and see that you are being shamelessly deceived, that they want something “from under you”, hope for a reciprocal curtsy, try to pity, put you in an uncomfortable position - do not show your emotions, nod politely and continue to go about your business.
Imagine - sometimes people say compliments just to please each other!
Accept this fact and be glad that you are loved and appreciated. And even a little flattery from a good person will not hurt.
Do not convince the "flatterer" of the opposite
Everyone is entitled to their opinion. It is your talent that means nothing to you, and a person, perhaps, has never seen anything more amazing in his life. And in general - more visible from the side. Give thanks and forget about the compliment (worry about it, stay awake at night, weigh its “validity” and look for pitfalls).
If your sincere emotions in response to a compliment do not coincide with the hopes of the "flatterer" - do not upset the person
Keep your emotions to yourself. Sincerity, of course, is wonderful, but it can also finally “finish off” a man. Smiling is your best answer. Only a modest smile - not Hollywood, not encouraging, not ingratiating. And fewer words. "Thank you" or "Thank you" is enough. If there are no problems with a sense of humor (both, of course), you can respond to praise in a joking tone. And the situation will be discharged, and the awkward pause will end, and besides, laughter prolongs life.
Don't flatter yourself
You should not fill a compliment with some global meaning that was not put there at all. Maybe your, for example, work colleague just wanted to please you - well, that was his mood. And you, blushing and turning pale, are confused in words, perceiving his words as an invitation to closer communication (especially dangerous if you have feelings for him). Such a reaction can cost you a damaged reputation and disappointment. Try to distinguish politeness with gallantry from real flirting.

Compliment, when it comes from the heart - this is an additional portion of the "sun" for any woman. Accept it with dignity , as a small gift, and return the person back with your positive energy.

How to respond to a compliment to a man, not knowing how sincere his words are? Some masterfully manipulate attention, others speak from the heart, but show monstrous awkwardness. But in any case, it is unacceptable that the situation after uttering a compliment becomes negative.

How to respond to compliments

It is not difficult for any girl or woman with normal self-esteem to answer How to behave after praise - everything is individual here: whether to accept criticism of any kind with a raised head, a gentle smile, slight irony, or with pleasure.

The positive effect of a compliment is that the girl feels her own attractiveness and radiates more and more charm, magnetism. As a result, it remains only to get used to the numerous admirations that sound more and more often.

If another person is confident in the presence of certain qualities in the interlocutor, in the end it is his right to think so. And this should be taken lightly.

Before answering a compliment to a man who is sincere, first you need to believe in what was said, accept these words, apply them to yourself. Then, just allow yourself to be yourself.

How to respond to a compliment to a man who is not familiar? You should not go into verbosity or immediately show excessive interest. It is enough to answer briefly: "thank you", "I am very pleased." If the compliment comes from a well-known man, a humorous answer is quite acceptable: "everything for you", "glad to like you."

If the compliment is embarrassing, you can respond with your emotions in mind, acknowledging your excitement. A smile is essential.

Self-esteem

Low self-esteem instills feelings of guilt, feeling as if the recipient of the compliment is deceiving others. An inflated opinion of oneself gives rise to the impression that this is the smallest thing that could be admired, or even offended. If such emotions are present, it is worth adjusting self-esteem.

A person has the right to rejoice when others like him or his actions. If from the heart, it remains to accept it with the same sincerity, and there is nothing reprehensible in this.

If people emphasize those aspects that are important in the interlocutor, this is an additional reason for him to see himself in a positive light, as well as to inspire self-improvement.

From the point of view of psychology, there is a principle of "mirroring": a person who does not allow good assessments of himself is less likely to express them to other people. Therefore, the acceptance of admiration is a certain indicator of the ability to give it to others.

The lack of reaction to the remarks made leaves a much more unpleasant impression than any reaction.

Invalid Reactions

The purpose of a compliment is to please, to win over. In addition to the personal attitude towards him, there is a certain kind of behavior that looks incorrect.

How not to respond to a compliment:

Objection. This will confuse the fan. It turns out that the girl is not like that. And he has no choice but to believe, or re-persuade her of what is said. From an innocent flirtation, an argument grows or a stupid situation is created.
Justification. A man may doubt the adequacy of a woman, and also begin to wonder whether it is worth developing communication in favor of rapprochement with her. For example, he praised the dress, and in response he heard that it was her random choice, and she did not care what impression she made.
Indifference. The man, perhaps, was preparing to utter these words, did not dare, and there was no reaction. There may simply not be a next time.
Neglect. The pride of the ladies makes them suspect others of flattery. In this case, men disappear any desire to show signs of attention to them.
Exaggerated joy. The violent reaction suggests that the girl had some expectations and is now satisfied with what she heard. A man should feel like he owes something to her. If there is a free expression of admiration, then why should this be followed by the development of communication?
compliment in return. Such a manifestation will seem unnatural if it occurs in the next moment. Interlocutors, moreover, may feel stiffness.

Compliment in conversation and correspondence

How to respond when a man gives a compliment? Regardless of the topic of conversation, it should be borne in mind that every man will be pleased to mention his virtues. Such areas can be touched upon, as if by chance, in response messages.

Pleasant themes for men:

Personal qualities: a man is pleased to learn from others how smart, cheerful, kind, affectionate he is. And in order for these adjectives to sound most natural, you need to notice as many precise details as possible, arguments why this is so.
Sphere of activity and self-realization: if he has a responsible, difficult, useful, inspiring job, you should tell him about it. The same goes for the results of his hobby.
Intimate sphere: to hear from a woman that a man lived up to her expectations is beyond praise. This is not only pleasant to hear, but also inspires him to new exploits.
Emphasizing the success of a man in sports, be sure to focus on his willpower, the qualities of character, thanks to which he achieved results.

What to answer a man for a compliment, examples:

default: "thank you, that's very kind of you";
praise the gallantry, tact, upbringing, politeness, observation of the interlocutor;
start a casual conversation in response;
in any conversation, you can indirectly emphasize the status of a man, albeit in a joking way, which will certainly evoke positive emotions in him: “you speak as it should be for businessmen”, “people with your capabilities are better at it”;
responding to a compliment about his appearance, you can see that the pleasant words of a man improve mood, relieve fatigue.

How to answer a man for a compliment SMS:

responding to a compliment, you can also mention positive situations from the past that made you think well of him, and the like;
tell him about how others reacted to his authority, behavior, even if this is an exaggeration to some extent;
noting his subtle sense of humor, in SMS you can see that he had not had to laugh so hard for a long time;
send gratitude in verse.

How to respond to a man with a compliment with humor:

"... and all this is useless if there are no such bright men as you";
"but I can't achieve your skill (talent in that)";
"I also know how to embroider on a typewriter";
"if you take me as your secretary, I can't do that";
"The main thing is to cook pasta deliciously, and the rest will follow."

How to respond to a compliment to a man who likes:

dilute with non-verbal gestures: a hug, a kiss, a playful handshake;
if the compliment had an inspiring effect, say that the partner’s words are like a healing balm;
if desired, you can promise your partner something that will please him.

Signs of insincere praise

If a man allows a statement about a woman that belittles him, or it seems that this is a great indulgence on his part, such praise is alarming.

Usually people are not interested in how those who are one step below feel. Therefore, an overly flattering compliment can provoke persistent disgust. And after a while, the true purpose of that compliment may be revealed.

An "irrefutable" compliment that inspires a need to "fit" or irritates. And only positive words, expressed on an equal footing, deserve a sincere reaction.

Hidden compliments

Not every person is ready to be straightforward and self-confident enough to meet a response. Therefore, approval or appreciation on his part may take the form of a randomly asked question, remarks that are associated with pleasant impressions for a woman.

An implied compliment can take the form of a natural reaction in a conversation. At the beginning of a relationship, this is quite appropriate, given the temporary awkwardness. And then it is convenient to use a subtle game.

The ability to recognize the cautious intention of a person to win over oneself will shorten the path to achieving harmony. But a guy's remark about a girl's bright appearance in a form such as "she gets everyone's attention" can cause her outrage if misunderstood.

Before responding to a compliment to a man by correspondence, it is not necessary to specifically "formulate" the reciprocal praise, because one can unintentionally "imply" his attractiveness and other virtues in the course of a conversation.

Women's mistakes

It would be wrong not to praise men. But some do not feel the measure, while an excessive amount of admiration loses its value. Many flattering words have the opposite effect: a person loses motivation, closes.

You should not use banal, boring phrases for everyone, but instead, you need to think about what a person really deserves, and "take out" these words from the inside. If a famous person is admired for his appearance, another delight is unlikely to surprise her much. But other noted virtues, with regard to character or actions, will surely find a response in the soul.

When praise comes in handy

The brain of a man more effectively perceives clear "constructions" from words, and not "blurry" hints. Therefore, specific comments are quite suitable for compliments.

Thinking about how beautifully to respond to a compliment to a man, it will not be superfluous to note for yourself when exactly he will come in handy.

Examples of situations where nice words can be helpful:

the partner has depression, severe fatigue;
he had a lack of confidence in his abilities;
there is a need to stimulate initiative in him;
praise in order to establish a more trusting contact.

Where do bad reactions come from?

The causes of wrong reactions lie deep within. Perhaps the cause was long-forgotten traumas of the past, and it makes no sense to project painful sensations onto new acquaintances that appear in life.

If a person is absolutely unable to accept compliments addressed to him, he should think about it and look for reasons in himself. If there is confidence that a person cannot be admired, the prerequisites may be rooted in childhood, when the attitude towards oneself was formed with the help of parents.

The desire to protect oneself from manipulation can inspire suspicion of every person who utters kind words. But this is wrong: such an attitude that the world is full of evil is destructive in itself, no matter what happens.

The belief that there are no free and useful things is wrong. If someone's words make you feel obligated, this may indicate that much in life is equivalent to material cost: more space should be allowed for spiritual manifestations. There are some things that you can't pay for.

A woman should also make compliments to other people more often, and then they will come into her life even more.

The world and the people in it have changed. We are often indifferent to each other, and if a person hears a compliment addressed to him, he is embarrassed and indistinctly babbles words of gratitude. We will tell you how to adequately respond to a compliment and what to answer.

How to respond to a compliment - the wrong reaction

First, learn how not to respond to praise:

never make excuses. You are sure that it is impossible to admire you, but this is an erroneous opinion. You have low self-esteem - that's the problem. You deservedly received a compliment from acquaintances or strangers;
don't say the praise isn't true. The person complimented your hair or makeup. And you told him in response that there was nothing special and no one had spoken about it before. These words are a provocation for further praise;
don't be offended. Even if you don't like the compliment, don't yell at the person and don't attack them with your fists. Just ignore his words or smile and say "Thank you";
do not frighten a person with excessive joy from a compliment addressed to you. No need to thank out loud and kiss the interlocutor on all cheeks.

Responding to compliments correctly

You have heard praise in your address. Try to straighten your shoulders and look kindly into the eyes of the interlocutor. Smile sincerely, and the person will feel that his words are pleasant to you. If you're embarrassed, say, "I'm a little confused," followed by words of thanks.

Respond to a compliment like this:

"Thank you! I am pleased to know that you think so”;
"Thank you! I appreciate your signs of attention”;
“It is very difficult for me to work on this project (article and the like), but thank you for understanding this.” Another option is “Thank you, I tried so hard.” These words of gratitude will be the answer for the praise of the boss or employee about your work done;
"Thank you! I'm so glad to hear that";
"Thank you! I was lifted up by the pleasant words.”

Your answer may depend on the person who gave the praise;

compliment from a friend. Hug her and sincerely thank her;
compliment from a business partner. Modestly say: “I take an example from you!”
compliment from a loved one. Words of gratitude are complemented by a passionate kiss;
compliment from a stranger. To a stranger's lavish odes of praise, nod your head and say "Yes, thank you!" These words will let him know that you know about your beautiful dress, hairstyle and the like;
compliment from friends. You can answer with a joke. For example: “Thank you! I'm also crazy about my hairdresser." Another option is "I always try to look good, but I can't keep up with you."

It will be easier for you to respond to the praise of a friend or relative. Even if the answer is stupid, sincerity will correct the delicate state of affairs.

How to respond to a dubious compliment

Doubtful and even offensive compliments are not directed at you. Remember this. They indicate the self-doubt of the person who said something stupid. Do not answer with anger, but do not leave malicious words unanswered. Answer options:

“I know that you want to compliment me, but it is not clear what you said. Can we just talk?" These words will make the interlocutor start a conversation with you, and you will understand why he is rude;
“Maybe I was lucky, but it was not luck that brought me success, but hard work.” With these words, respond to the caustic praise of work colleagues if they envy your success.

If you hear a stinging compliment from a stranger on the street, just walk by. You will show him with your appearance that you ignore such people and do not want to communicate with them.

The correct response to compliments is a real art. If there are no words, just smile, look at the interlocutor and shake his hand in a friendly way. He will understand everything.

sovetclub.ru

How to respond to a compliment

The previous article, How to Respond to Compliments, described popular behaviors and responses to compliments. Perhaps, on one or more occasions, you have recognized your behavior. This article will look at step-by-step instructions that will tell you (help you navigate) how to respond to a compliment.

Most often, compliments are made to please a person and give him pleasure. Therefore, when you hear praise addressed to you, rejoice. Indeed, if the interlocutor says pleasant kind words to you, and receives negative and irritation in response, then this will prompt him to at least two thoughts:

1) you no longer need to praise;

2) You react quite aggressively to kind words. The interlocutor may be offended, and you may not want to do something pleasant too.

All thoughts of a person about himself are quite subjective. From the outside, everything may look completely different than you painted a picture of your world in your head. Therefore, when in doubt that a compliment is more like flattery, and you do not know how to respond to a compliment. The first thing to do is stop doubting. The moment you believe that the compliment is sincere and well-deserved, the world becomes more beautiful, your mood rises, a sparkle appears in your eyes, and a happy smile appears on your face.

Shoulders straightened, eyes shining, a happy smile on his face, and an important moment comes. Look into the eyes of the person who complimented you. Let him see that you are pleased with his words. We quickly move on to the final step.

A compliment is a psychological “stroking” tactic. It is necessary to use the “reciprocal stroking” so that the interlocutor does not have a feeling of dissatisfaction. About two important aspects of the voice on the pages of the blog of elegance and style - http://elisty.ru/ - there are publications The secret of a beautiful female voice and How to make a voice pleasant

Several variants

how to respond to a compliment:

Your smile + sincere “Thank you!”

Jokingly answer: “I take an example from you!” or “You have good taste!”

Tell about your feelings: “Your words are a real gift for me!”

Be embarrassed and say: “You embarrassed me, but I am so pleased to hear it!”

As an additional opportunity to thank the interlocutor, you can easily touch or hug him. These actions complement the effect of "psychological stroking".

We continue to keep secrets about women in the section of the blog of elegance and style - http://elisty.ru/ - Secrets of women

elisty.ru

How can you respond to a compliment?

A compliment seems to be such a simple thing, but you need to be able to respond to it correctly. Beautiful words can drive into a dead end, disarm even the most sociable. How to respond to a compliment, so as not to get into a mess, not to look stupid? Let's try to figure it out.

Compliments are different.

It turns out they are different. It all depends on who said what to whom, with what intonation and subtext.

Sincerely spoken words from an open person are a real gift. It is always felt, as he speaks, tensely or simply, easily, from the heart. It is an honest, truthful compliment that is most valued, it cheers up, increases self-esteem, makes our life brighter.
The compliment is unnatural. Such words are pronounced for the sake of when the speakers have specific goals. This text is easy to recognize, it will be on duty, importunate, thrown out of politeness, perhaps it will praise just those sides that you have always considered weak. No one needs such praise, it humiliates.
An implicit compliment given by a person who is embarrassed to speak directly, but really wants to tell you something nice.
Business, from the boss to the subordinate. This pleasant event will lift the working spirit, but it must also be earned.

Even a seemingly simple thing requires the ability to answer it. The reaction manifests itself depending on the nature of the spoken words.

How not to react?

It’s worth starting with understanding how not to answer:

Many, having heard commendable speeches, begin to deny what was said to them: “What are you, there is nothing special about this!”. These are provocative actions that make you praise again and again. Which can make your opponent feel awkward. Know how to adequately accept praise.
Don't make excuses. You deserve the approval. And this dress that fits you so perfectly, or quitting smoking that your friends appreciated - your good work and attitude to life.
Do not neglect, you may offend the speaker. The reaction must come without fail, even if you are extremely modest and clamped, answer. Smile, at least say: “Thank you!”
Don't go to extremes, being overly enthusiastic looks cute but silly. Stick to the middle ground.

Yes, sometimes having accepted a compliment, we do not know what to do with it. So many emotions, and so - not enough.

Causes of an incorrect reaction

To get rid of the listed unnecessary reactions, we will analyze their causes:

The first and most important of these is poor self-esteem. Are you sure, or maybe someone made it clear that you are not worthy of admiration. Usually, such problems come from childhood, from a lack of parental attention. The habit of disliking oneself has remained since then. But everything has changed, you are surrounded by new people who, perhaps, absolutely sincerely love you. Accept the words with firm conviction that they are right.
And the reverse side of the medal, a person has such a high opinion of himself that someone else's praise seems insufficient for him, and he is offended, without even trying to hide it. Here you also need to adjust your attitude towards yourself, but only in the opposite direction.
You think that what you have said obliges you - it is not so. It is not necessary to flatter in return, as court ladies do at balls, it looks unnatural and not sincere. You have nothing to answer - no need. Just accept what is said.
Your distrust of the speaker may cause the wrong reaction. You look at yourself suspiciously and listen, thinking that you are being flattered too much. Yes, sometimes it's true. An excellent response to this would be a good sense of humor and a sharp phrase.

So, you received a compliment, how to respond to it?

How to respond to the compliment "you are beautiful"?

The answer to such a long-awaited compliment should be beautiful. Not all men can speak beautifully, not all girls can adequately answer. Let's try to give an answer to a woman whose beauty was appreciated by a compliment:

Don't convince him otherwise. Give an answer to understand that yes, I am a beautiful, but modest lady, for example: “Thank you, I am pleased, your words lifted my spirits!” You can spice it all up with a restrained smile, but no more. Such tactics will keep him at a distance, but will not scare away the cold.
Don't be afraid to look directly into the eyes while answering, this will show your openness and interest in the speaker.
If you still recognize gross flattery here, laugh it off: “You over-praised me ...”.
Do not be rude, even if these words were said by the person from whom you least wanted to hear them. For example, the phrase: “I didn’t expect this from you ...” will belittle not only him, but also you. You have to be able to save face.
You are very confused, do not know what to say to such long-awaited phrases. Count to yourself to 10, and with a firm voice agree, believe me, you really are. But do not throw yourself on the neck, from surging feelings, control yourself, phrases like: “Oh God, tell me something else nice!” may give reason to think that now everything is allowed to him.

What a difficult task it is to respond adequately to male attention. But having learned this once, it will become easier to behave correctly in exciting situations further.

How nice to respond to a compliment?

Elegantly responding to compliments is an art. It all depends on the person who decided to "stroke" you psychologically.

If this is a close friend, you can even hug her and say with a smile: “Thank you!”
If a business partner, modestly laugh it off "I take an example from you!"
If the man turned out to be generous with praise, do not refuse, nod slightly: “Yes, thank you!” This will make it clear that you know about it and others too.
Not only women love praise, but also men. Why not. The answer should be simple and short: “Yes, thank you, I like my hairdresser too!”. Or joking: “I try to look good, but I can’t keep up with you!”

It is much easier to respond to words from a friend than from a recent acquaintance or acquaintance. And even if you said something stupid and got into an awkward position, sincerity will always help correct the situation.

How to respond to a compliment with humor?

A sense of humor, as it sounds unusual, will help here, but without it. The ability to answer in an original way can often impress the interlocutor more than the compliment itself.

"I'm not overjoyed myself!"
“And I can also embroider on a typewriter!”
You were rude on the bus, remember that "politeness is the best weapon of a thief": "What a kind look you have, sorry for making you angry!"
You can jokingly be indignant: “Why do you look so good today, I can’t do it!”

Don't forget that compliments are hard to answer, but giving them is even harder. Do not make the speaker nervous when he “blurted out” the wrong thing in your direction, be able to support the person who tried to please you - this, sometimes, will show the attitude towards him or her better than any answer.

Let's say nice words to a friend as often as possible so that we don't have such a question: "How to respond to a compliment?" and we always knew it.

Video: answering compliments correctly

In this video, psychologist Denis Kostin will give a short lesson on the topic: “How to respond to compliments”, give some tips and recommendations:

But not everyone can adequately respond to them. How to respond to a compliment in such a way that both the speaker feels good and you are pleased? Good question, and we will try to find the answer to it.

Types of compliments

There is a huge variety of compliments, and the reaction to them can vary greatly depending on the type. First, they may or may not be sincere. As a rule, in the latter case, you have some kind of unpleasant aftertaste after you have heard the praise. In everyday life we call it flattery. Usually there is some hidden purpose behind it, which is almost always felt in communication.

Pleasant words can be spoken from different positions: on an equal footing, from above and below. A man who compliments a woman in the last version does not shine. We are not interested in those who feel themselves one step below. Praise from above looks like a handout from the mighty of this world and usually causes only irritation and aggression. And only a compliment made on an equal footing is worthy of a positive and sincere reaction.

Sometimes it's hard for a guy to give you a direct compliment, so he takes a detour. For example, instead of “you look great”, he says: “Every passer-by turns on you!”. You can hear the anger in this, and it is logical, because he is worried about his own self-doubt.

There is also such a subspecies as hidden compliments. It is not always appropriate to say pleasant things to a person directly - in this case, an atmosphere of intimacy and trust in a relationship is created through indirect methods: interested questions, sincere remarks, and natural reactions to the conversation. Especially often we encounter this at the beginning of a relationship, when a guy and a girl are a little embarrassed and, at the same time, pleased to play such a subtle game.

Erroneous reactions

Before talking about how to properly respond to praise, it is necessary to understand the characteristics of our negative reactions. Some girls blush with embarrassment, others try to turn invisible. One way or another, you can react differently to compliments, but I want to save you from the most common mistakes:

Objection

A lot of girls, having heard praise addressed to them, immediately begin to argue with her: “There is nothing special about this!” or “So it just happened!”. Behind this is the desire to belittle oneself and one's dignity, which, at the very least, looks rather strange and causes embarrassment for the one who gives the compliment.

Justification

The girl instantly has a desire to justify herself for something good. Often, she begins to tell no one the details that no one needs about why some of her traits are admired. For example: “Oh, I bought this dress in a second-hand store for mere pennies.”

Ignoring

Some women generally prefer not to return a compliment to a man, pretending that nothing happened. But in fact, it only makes sense to do this when the person is deeply unpleasant to you, and you don’t want to talk to him at all. Otherwise, the absence of a reaction hurts even more than its presence in any form.

neglect

Agree, it is very unpleasant when you praise a person, and he makes his face a brick and shows indifference with his whole appearance. There is a feeling that you have given something away, and no one needs it, and disappointment with resentment becomes a natural result.

Excessive enthusiasm

This is another extreme that should be avoided. There is such a category of girls who, having heard a few flattering words addressed to them, are ready to do everything for the sake of the person speaking them. But it's not right! Normally, if someone compliments you, they just want to please you, and they don't need anything else from you. And if you lose your head and start to "swim", then you become very vulnerable and available for manipulation.

Reasons for wrong responses to compliments

Virtually nothing in the world happens by accident. All of the above reactions are based on some reasons, which, as a rule, are associated with personal problems. It's possible that it's not about you - to rule it out, think about what compliments make you want to send the speaker to hell. If this list includes only individual people with their words, then you should think about communicating with them. Well, in the case when you cannot accept praise addressed to you at all, you should look for the reason in yourself.

More often than not, she has low self-esteem. You have a strong belief that you cannot be sincerely admired. Accordingly, any praise is perceived as a mockery and causes the wrong reaction. Usually the roots of this problem should be sought in childhood, when parents and other significant adults give little praise to the child, who is still small, and all his ideas about himself depend on the assessments of others. Therefore, already as an adult, you perceive any compliments with distrust, and it seems to you that you are being deceived. The only way out is to love yourself. By the way, this will positively affect all areas of your life.

From low self-esteem quite logically follows the feeling of embarrassment experienced by a person who has heard supposedly undeserved praise to himself. Sometimes, in especially neglected cases, it even transforms into a feeling of guilt, because it seems to you that you are deceiving others, and they have illusions about you.

Another category of people, on the contrary, has an overestimated self-esteem. It seems to them that the achievement that a person pays attention to is a mere trifle, and they are capable of more. Some even manage to take offense at the praise, saying something like: “Do you really think that this is the maximum that I can do ?!”. If compliments evoke these or similar feelings in you, then it’s obviously time to think about correcting your self-esteem.

It also happens that it seems to us that compliments oblige us to something.

If you have been praised, then the person needs to be given something in return: reciprocal praise, your warm attitude, or even some kind of service. Usually it’s all the fault of attitudes that have been ingrained in the subconscious since childhood or youth - “in life you have to pay for everything” or “free cheese is only in a mousetrap”. You can, of course, tritely answer a compliment with a compliment, but it is likely that it will not look beautiful and natural. It is much better if you work with these attitudes, for example, by making a list of good “free” things and convincing yourself of the irrationality of the penetration of commodity-money relations into all spheres of life.

Finally, the last reason why we do not know how to respond to a compliment correctly is suspicion. You decide that the person is trying to manipulate you with praise. Simply put, it flatters you by exaggerating or even inventing non-existent virtues and achievements. Unfortunately, in some cases this may turn out to be true, and then your intuition should be given a monument. However, if you strive to see such a catch in every praise, then you should think about it. Most likely, it’s all about negative attitudes about people or the whole world as a whole, for example, “a man can only need one thing from a woman” or “the world is full of evil.” Naturally, such ideas simply will not let you be happy, and you need to get rid of them - sometimes with the help of a psychologist.

Action plan

So, someone gave you a compliment. Perhaps this is a man who has been sympathetic to you for a long time or this is a boss who was pleasantly pleased with the annual report - it does not matter. You must discard all of the above obstacles and irrational attitudes in order to properly respond to praise. And we will tell you how to do it.

Internally believe in a compliment

Did you know that people usually say nice words to each other just to please each other? So, accept this fact! When you hear a compliment about your person, sincerely rejoice to yourself. Perhaps the words of a person sound false and unnatural, but try to believe otherwise.

You can reassure yourself that even if it seems as if your merits have been exaggerated, this is the personal point of view of your acquaintance. And he has the right to think so, especially since we often perceive ourselves through the prism of personal defenses and attitudes, and a person from the outside can be more visible. In addition, you do not lose anything by believing in a compliment, but, being disappointed, you will get a spoiled mood for half a day.

sincere joy

As soon as you accept the compliment, the second stage of the reaction will come by itself. You look into the eyes of the person who voiced the praise, straighten your shoulders, straighten your back and smile beautifully. He will be pleased to see that you are happy with his words. Let's tell you a short story sent by one of the readers. A sad girl is standing at the bus stop - it looks like she is very tired at work. And then a guy passing by made a compliment to her figure. How quickly she blossomed! There was no trace of fatigue left, and in a couple of seconds she turned into a real beauty. That's the power of compliments.

Gratitude

The simplest and easiest thing you can do is say “Thank you!”. This is absolutely and completely enough for an adequate response to a compliment. More is not needed! Although, if the person's praise really had a magical effect on you, you can say something like: “Your words are a real balm for my soul!” or "Thanks, I'm really glad you like it." In some cases, it is appropriate to joke: “I am learning from you!” or “I take an example from you.” If there is a slight embarrassment, then it should not be hidden: “I am embarrassed, but I am very pleased to hear this.” You can dilute the words with non-verbalism and take a person by the hand or even hug. The most important thing is to be natural and positive.

In order to correctly respond to any compliments, you just need to realize one simple thing: you have every right to accept them from the people around you. Saying them, they do it sincerely and from the bottom of their hearts, wanting to bring you joy or improve your mood.

You have the right to be happy that other people like you or your actions. Well, in order to hear pleasant words addressed to you more often, it is enough for you to say more compliments yourself, and they will definitely return to you a pleasant hundredfold.

Many girls hear compliments addressed to them. But few people know how to respond to them correctly. But the wrong reaction to pleasant words can offend a person or give him hope for a close relationship that you do not want to give. As a result, everyone should know how to respond to a compliment you are beautiful. Then you will not find yourself in awkward situations. And no one will take you at your word.

Varieties of compliments

In general, compliments can be different. And the first one is flattery. In such a situation, you are told what you want to hear. For example, you have a photo on the network where you are without makeup and in a stupid pose. And if someone writes “you are beautiful”, then this is hardly a pure impulse of the soul.

There are also compliments in the form of obligatory words. For example, if you bought a new dress, then your friends will say that you are beautiful just to show some decency.

Sincere compliments are less common. They are often not spoken openly. At the same time, you immediately feel warmth and a special attitude towards yourself.

How to respond to a compliment about beauty?

There are several forms of response to the compliment "you are beautiful." These include:

Return compliment. This is if you want to flirt with a guy;
Joy. Send an emoji or smile live. This reaction is noncommittal;
Gratitude. Say "thank you" and that's it. This is the most generic answer;
Joke. This is more suitable for friendly communication.

Compliments such as "you are beautiful" or "" must be answered carefully. Excessive politeness or embarrassment can be interpreted as mutual love. And if you do not want to build a relationship with someone who praises you, then it is better to refrain from violent reactions.

How not to respond to a compliment?

In order not to look awkward, you should understand how best not to respond to pleasant words. You can add to the blacklist of answers:

Excuses. I'm not beautiful, it just happened ...;
Negation. No, you are! I am a witch indeed;
Ignore. You are praised and you are ignored. This is fine!?
Extra emotions. It just looks stupid.

In any case, you need to talk a little with the one who said the compliment. Understand what he feels for you and why he says so. Only then, it is necessary to make any decisions.

Compliments are like weapons

Often guys use compliments as a weapon against girls. For example, a guy can praise you properly so that you can write off, do something for him, or borrow money.

Compliments are used by womanizers to drag victims into bed. So, you should not melt at the first beautiful phrase. Look at the person as a whole, not just what they say.

Especially careful you need to be those girls who do not have a bright appearance. Nobody praised you, and now you are being praised? This is cause for concern. Perhaps this is such a joke or someone wants something from you.

“You are beautiful” is a commonplace compliment that all girls can say. Don't overreact to it. See what's next. Try to assess the situation. Then you will not be deceived.