How to get a person out of your head. From a clean slate: how to get it out of your head

Speaking in the language of meteorology, partly cloudy in life generates garbage in the head. We cannot take a deep breath, sleep peacefully and not suspect every person of something!

You can get rid of obsessive thoughts from your head with the help of completely free ways!

Leaving the garbage from the head on the paper

If you feel that your head is just bursting with endlessly unanswered questions and thoughts, take a piece of paper and pour everything on it. If you don't have a notepad or pen handy, you can do this using notes on your phone. Write everything, everything that you have boiled, read several times and delete. Do not be skeptical of this advice, you will try and notice how the garbage will leave your head.

There are always people in our environment who are ready to take a dose of other people's problems. People call it friendship! Share your experiences with loved ones, get sincere advice and problems will fade into the background. It is important to just speak out so that no one interrupts and does not say the most stupid phrase: I warned you, but you did not listen to me!

Get to know other people's problems

You need to be able to be objective about your problems. Sometimes it's funny to listen when a person is nervous about not having time to drink morning coffee, when some people cannot afford such a "luxury". In order to throw all the garbage out of your head once and for all, it is useful to compare yourself with others and understand that everything is not so bad with you, it can be worse.

envy

This is one of the most effective tips that will help get the garbage out of your head. Envy can be different: you can envy and wish a person to fail, but you can simply take an example from him, and a good example, as a rule, is contagious. Throw away all the problems that have accumulated in your head, and throw all your strength into catching up, and then overtaking a person who is successful in your eyes.

Live a different life

You can often hear that they say, “Katka lives better! Wow, what kind of car does he drive! If you are determined to throw all the garbage out of your head, dare a fun and instructive experiment - switch roles with someone, at least for 2-3 days. It will be very interesting. But looking ahead, we will tell you that you will be happy to return to your old life and just change the vector of its development a little.

I live one day

Remember your childhood! Did you think about what you would have breakfast tomorrow, wear to school, did you write a schedule for the day and made plans for two or three years in advance, did you predict and analyze your every day? No, no, of course not! All decisions were made with the help of "like-dislike"! We recommend that in adult life do fasting days and live one day. You will be surprised how much easier your life will become and all the garbage will go out of your head. Today you want to dance until the morning, so dance, but you will fight tomorrow's headache tomorrow.

Answer all "whys" with "because"

You sit with a friend, and in an hour she said 100 “whys”: That's why all husbands are like husbands, but mine is not like that? Why am I always late? Why do I dislike cooking so much, but I try, but it still doesn’t work out? Why am I surrounded by bad people? Why can't I lose weight?

Can you imagine how much garbage is in her head?

You can continue indefinitely. Let's put an end once and for all. A person always has the right to choose: he will “why” all his life, or he will use his right to choose and begin to lose weight, try cooking again and again, leave people who are not suitable, etc.

I live the way I want

We are accustomed to obey the opinions of other people. You can scream, beat yourself in the chest and prove that this is not so! But it is enough to remember the situation when all friends gather and how many things we do just “for the company”, so as not to offend, keep up and not be a black sheep. We do this when there are very close people nearby, who, it would seem, are ready to understand everything and forgive everything, but how many situations are there when we obey the opinions of colleagues, acquaintances, etc.?

Novels are different - long and fleeting, long-awaited and random, light and burdensome. Unfortunately, not all novels end with a wedding and a long life. Most of them end very unsuccessfully, causing pain and suffering to one of the partners. As a rule, this partner is a girl, because a rare lady remembers the relationship with the phrase “ it was just sex" or " met and parted».

Having experienced disappointment in love, the girls remember the object of adoration for a long time, attributing to it a lot of virtues and dreaming of reunion. Even more torment is brought by thoughts of his real pastime, when a woman begins to be jealous of the hypothetical new girlfriends of her former lover. Such masochism does not lead to good, as it is followed by a complete loss of self-respect and apathy towards the outside world.

How to throw a person out of your head and heart? Proven advice from psychologists will help to part with obsessive thoughts about love failure.

Out of sight, out of mind

How to get a loved one out of your head if every day his photos remind you of him, his forgotten mug or a music CD given to him for Christmas? Such a task is only possible for strong-willed persons who are able to clench their hearts in an icy fist and look through their fingers at such " psychological anchors».

It's time to start cleaning! You need to throw out:

• The remaining things from him are slippers, a T-shirt and other forgotten wardrobe items.
• Gifts given to them (you can temporarily hide them in the pantry or give them to a friend).
• General photos and videos, including those on electronic media. No pictures of him on your phone!
• Discs of music or movies that evoke moments spent together.

Such simple actions first of all help to get rid of annoying memories. Let's move on to the next steps.

Down with resentment against a still loved one!

After a painful breakup, it is common for a person to feel offended. Perhaps his hopes and expectations were not justified. Perhaps he was angered by the fact that he never achieved reciprocity. Cheating, no doubt, is a reason for anger and resentment. But is it worth accumulating negative emotions?

Psychologists advise as soon as possible to stop wasting your energy on such manifestations of feelings. "Relishing" mental pain, a woman remains in this situation for a long time, preventing her release from thoughts about a person.

Stop crying!

• Think about the reason for your anger or resentment. Once the sources of negative emotions are identified, it becomes easier to get them out of your head.
• Turn the situation around! Perhaps you should not be angry with a person, but thank him? Mentally say “thank you” to the man for the pleasant moments spent together. And if the relationship was painful, then their end is rather a reason for joy. Then thank your ex-lover for freedom, peace and independence.

No contact with someone you can't get out of your head

Many girls are consciously looking for a meeting with a former lover, preferring for their pastime those places where he is guaranteed to appear. But if you are determined to throw a person out of your life, such places should be avoided.

No need to run to his favorite cafe or walk under the windows of his house with his girlfriends. If you are invited to the same party, it is better to stay at home. This does not mean that the ex-boyfriend "won" and you can no longer go anywhere. You just have to temporarily not meet with him until the emotions subside.

This rule also applies to social networks. How to get thoughts about a person out of your head if you regularly look at his Vkontakte page and follow his activity? Did he make friends with some girl? Have you changed your marital status? Whose pictures is he commenting on? Stop!

Time to slow down!

• Use social media only to connect with positive people.
• Set yourself a time frame for staying online - no more than 10-15 minutes. This time is barely enough for the tapes of friends, so the matter will not come to the beloved.
• Refrain from Facebook and Vkontakte at all. If self-control is not enough and you admire his pictures every day, then you should stop torturing yourself and temporarily give up social life on the network. Time to get out into the real world!

Favorite hobby

Doing what you love is a great help to get rid of thoughts about a failed romance. Any hobby that makes you happy will do. Let it be sports training, needlework or drawing - the main thing is that you are interested. If there is no time left for pleasant activities, it will not be superfluous to redraw your schedule during the crucial period of healing from love.

How to get a person out of your head when a hobby simply does not exist? The novel took so much time that you were completely lost in it, forgetting your friends and your favorite things. So, it's time to open up to new experiences. Try everything that is available, even if it seems crazy - ethnic dances, skydiving or lute lessons.

Believe me, there will be no time for the blues, and thoughts about the former lover will gradually disappear. In addition, your horizons will expand significantly, and you will become an even more interesting person for others.

We return to life

Look at the failed romance from the other side. It was just a "drunken hobby", and after it you will have to endure a natural hangover. Let them get rid of it gradually, but over time, the clarity of consciousness and a fresh look at the world around will still return!

An exciting relationship in which a woman completely dissolves, gradually outlives her as a person. She only thinks about making her loved one feel good, forgetting about her own interests and desires. It's time to put everything back.

Remember:

• Your favorite foods and drinks.
• Lovely habits that had to be suppressed because they annoyed Him.
• Your favorite songs and movies.

Those little things that were an integral part of your calm and happy life before the appearance of an ex-boyfriend in it, will allow you to return to feeling yourself in order to feel like a person again.

Let your friends know that you do not know how to get thoughts about a person out of your head. They will definitely help you solve the problem! A reclusive lifestyle is strictly contraindicated, and only old true friends will pull you out of their shell for at least an hour a day. In addition, walking in the fresh air is good for health even for those who do not suffer from unhappy love.

How to forget a loved one?

The feeling of love is rarely eternal and mutual for both. Have you broken up! How to come to terms with this? How to get out of my head the image of my beloved girl, beloved guy? How to deal with unrequited love. How to proceed?

In one movie, a young man, going through the pangs of unrequited love, asks his father in desperation: “What should I do?” His father answers this: “Suffer!” This is right, because love can only be suffering. A person in love should experience longing, heart confusion, confusion of feelings.

Alternative text

Love pangs will bring you spiritual experience. True love can bring heartache. However, suffering can be different. Sometimes they destroy personality. A person revels in his own suffering, while poisoning the lives of loved ones and his existence. Even your physical well-being can deteriorate due to fruitless love experiences. The fanaticism of unrequited love threatens with headaches, fainting, neurosis, and a decrease in immunity. According to modern psychologists, passionate love is equated with diseases: drug addiction and alcoholism. Abu Ali Ibn Sina (Avicenna) states: “Love is a disease similar to obsession, it is similar to melancholy. The signs of the disease are as follows: the patient's eyes are dry, sunken... Breathing can often be interrupted and come back again. He grieves and cries when he listens to love poems about parting and separation. His pulse is uneven, as if the pulse of a man tormented by grief, there is no order in his behavior. It is necessary to get rid of excessive attachment, which creates the prerequisites for creating the stereotype of "unhappy love." The complex of a loser, broken hopes, an unhappy life - all this can become chronic. Let's try to figure out how tragic the situation is so that you can enjoy life and forget about unrequited love.

Alternative text

How to forget a loved one. Step 1.

Most importantly, take a sober look at your relationship with your partner. The feeling of love gives only positive emotions. However, there are impulses masquerading as love that cause a pathological attachment to a person, such as: fear of being alone, hurt pride, a desire to live someone else's life, low self-esteem. First, stop blaming others for all your troubles. You need to admit to yourself your shortcomings and try to overcome them.

How to forget a loved one. Step 2

Let's take two sheets of paper. On the first sheet, try to describe in detail the story of your love and the torment and trouble that followed because of it. Below seven times you need to write the phrase: "It was in my life." Tear up this sheet and discard. As a result, you will separate yourself from your unhappy love. On the second sheet, you need to describe the results of your reflections that appeared at the beginning of work on your personality. What qualities do you need to acquire in order to be self-sufficient, what are your shortcomings that led to a fatal attachment? This piece of paper must be kept until the moment of restoration. Put pluses when you managed to work out or overcome something in yourself. It is a colossal work and patience, as Carlos Castaneda, an American writer, says, “we make ourselves strong or we make ourselves miserable. The costs are the same."

How to forget a loved one. Step 3

You have already “been fed up” with self-discipline, now your goal is to heal the wounds. In the morning, get out of bed immediately when you are tormented by bad thoughts. When you feel good and have pleasant thoughts, it is better to stay in bed with your loved one, with an interesting book. Every day, you need to go to bed at 23.00. At night, drink soothing tea with motherwort and valerian root (“Calming collection”). Give up sleeping pills, empty phone calls, especially in the evening. Read more, except for sentimental poems and novels. Books about overcoming difficulties, strength of mind, and travels have a great effect on the wounded heart. Literature has healing power.

Concentrate on work and study. You should bathe in the rays of glory, be proud of your achievements, achieve success and shine with glory. Help your family, take part in household chores - it will be good for everyone here to admire you and praise you. At the same time, pay minimal attention to the former passion, avoid meeting with her, talking, accept this loss. And know that a new love is waiting for you.

The motto of the third stage: "Every day a new joy." Try to teach yourself to enjoy yourself, drive away boredom. Drink tea with raspberry leaves, mint, elderflower, rose petals. Refrain from using perfumes, because synthetic odors have a detrimental effect on the nervous system, it is better to use aromatic oils that soothe the psyche. At night, you can perfume the bed with fir or rose oil.

Alternative text

How to forget a loved one. Step 4…

You need to convince yourself that soul-searing love experiences are ridiculous.

Try to forget about your love failure. Imagine that your tragedy is an injection of a vaccine, an inoculation that will protect you from future failures. Stop inventing an ideal for yourself - it's empty. Think of upcoming love as exciting, bright and connect it with another person. Fate drags us into different games - for example, tomorrow you can meet him, you must be joyful and leave your thoughts from the past in order to meet the present. It will be a shame when fate knocks on your door, gives you a new chance, but concludes that you are not at home.

How to forget a loved one. Psychologists advise

You need to do the following:

"Second birth"

Follow this simple routine every morning:

draw a full bucket of cold water, with the fingers of your right hand, twist the water clockwise, in the form of a whirlpool. At the same time, say the phrase: “Pure water, wash away my attachments and anger, help me be born again!” Repeat this action six times and pour all the water on your head at the top of your head. After a "cold shower" laugh out loud or smile, you can shout, there is only one condition - all emotions are positive. Imagine that you are reborn and become pure as a baby, without bad thoughts and unhappiness. Before going to bed, take a contrast shower (hot and cold water), do relaxing warm baths for your feet and hands.

"Firing Ligaments"

Buy a red candle and go to church. Light a candle, hold it with both hands and set the flame at knee level. Slowly move the candle up the midline of the body. Where the flame crackles, you need to support longer. At this moment, mentally call up your favorite image and wear out: “I am getting rid of you, I will be free of you. Forgive me and let me go." At that moment, when the flame of the candle rises to the level of the forehead, it is necessary to extinguish the candle. This ritual will help to get rid of obsessive dreams and memories.

"Relieve the burden from the soul"

You need to lie on your back, bend your right arm at the elbow. Position the hand with your fingers forward. Squeeze your fingers as if you were opening a door by the handle. Create circular motions with your hand, like pushing the pedal of a bicycle. Pull and push an imaginary pedal until your hand gets tired. So you will push out the negative energy from your body that has accumulated. It is best to do this exercise in a darkened room, alone.

"Airing the Heart"

This exercise is done in the evening. Squat facing the window. Disperse bad thoughts, relax. Rub the middle of the chest, palms, front of the neck, forehead with fir or lavender oil. Focus on the heart. Imagine an opening in your chest where you feel a burning sensation and a dull ache. As you exhale, imagine that air comes out of the hole and something dark, black, like smoke. With each exhalation, the pain in the chest decreases, a pleasant chill appears, the dark becomes less. The moment you begin to feel a "draught in your chest" - this means that everything that oppresses and poisons you is gone. Play soft music while doing this exercise.

Express Method

When heart languor floods over you, you need to use the unique ancient Indian finger exercise - mudra. In our situation, we need the “stairway of the heavenly temple” mudra: we press the fingertips of the left hand between the fingertips of the right hand (the fingers of the right hand are at the bottom). The little fingers of both hands are turned up, free, straightened. You hold your hands in this position for 1-2 minutes, and you feel better.

These techniques will help you forget about unhappy love.

Guys, we put our soul into the site. Thanks for that
for discovering this beauty. Thanks for the inspiration and goosebumps.
Join us at Facebook And In contact with

Probably, every adult is familiar with the feeling when, after a breakup in a relationship, you endlessly “chew” what happened and you just can’t get unnecessary thoughts out of your head.

website found advice from eminent psychologists who help to cope with experiences. And not only after unhappy love, but any situations that “do not let go” of us.

1. Talk less and pause

In a conversation with a person who causes an emotional storm, try to pause. There is time to cool down and look differently at what has been said. Fewer words will be said, which will later be regretted. And over time, anger and irritation can simply dissipate.

2. Wait and see what happens next

We feel the need to respond to the situation, to what is said, and to the people themselves, right away. And we do a lot of stupid things. Psychologists advise: take your time, allow yourself to take a breather. And see what happens next.

3. Stop looking for someone to blame

Constant analysis of the past in order to find someone to blame or blame yourself for everything rarely leads to a result. Usually there are a number of events involved in what happened and everything happens like a domino. Just accept: what happened, happened. Now need to find a way out.

4. Do not try to "get" into someone else's head

Ask yourself: if others try to understand what you think and what your motives are, will they be right? Most likely, they will not have the slightest idea what is really going on in your head. The same works for other people: there are high chances of drawing the wrong conclusions and wasting time.

5. Deal with the biggest problem first

Regardless of what happened, the biggest problem is usually our own anger. It literally envelops with emotions and leads away from solving the problem. Try to extinguish your anger through meditation, walking, or exercise. Or any activity that can calm you down.

6. Develop new skills and play sports

When the brain switches to learning something new, unnecessary thoughts gradually fade away. Every time we master an unfamiliar process, we focus on it and start thinking less. By the way, you can also switch with the help of physical activity.

7. Express negativity on paper and destroy it

Scientists have proven that by putting gloomy thoughts on paper and then destroying it, we relieve the tension and discomfort caused by these thoughts. The process itself allows better understand your feelings when you put them in writing. But mental recording does not have such an effect.

8. Remember that our thoughts are not facts.

Reality and our thoughts are not the same thing. Our emotions are reflected in us physically: we feel stress, anxiety, tension and fear with our whole body, which makes us perceive thoughts as facts. But this is not so. Psychologists say that powerful vivid images help us stop the flurry of negative thoughts. You can imagine the brightest events of the day or plan something interesting for the coming days.

12. Remember yourself who you were before this relationship

We sigh for ourselves in the past. The ones we were before we got into relationships that hurt. Remember yourself "then" - you have again There was an opportunity to become that cool person!