The child is nervous and irritable. A child (2 years old) often freaks out and is naughty. The mental state of the child. Hysteria in a child

No, your child, fortunately, does not suffer from enuresis or stuttering, he does not bite his nails, but for some reason, communication with him does not give you pleasure, it rather seems like a burden. You do not want to take him with you on a visit and are once again afraid to take him out into the yard, and there can be no talk of a preschool institution. After all, he is uncontrollable and loose, and most importantly, unpredictable in anything.

Here he is, like a whirlwind, rushing through the rooms, grabs things and throws them. Screaming, commanding and demanding the impossible. And suddenly he calmed down and hid somewhere. But it is not known what will follow this. Here he climbed under the table, seeing something. You are shaking all over with horror and fear, and it is not clear to you what the fear is connected with. But obsessively all the time raises his hand, as if saluting someone. But he double-checks something and repeats his actions like a ritual. And you won't know why. Just try and ask him.

Something a little different, he immediately starts to cry, falls into a rage, unable to restrain his anger, and may even swing at you. Then he leaves, seems calm, and you are again waiting for something tensely, not understanding what is happening to him: he is sick or he has a bad temper. And at the same time, everyone around thinks that he is nervous. But how can a baby be nervous at this age? What are his concerns? And what does the word "nervous" really mean?

As a rule, most often under this word lies the concept of household rather than medical. In the community sense, a “nervous” is a practically uncontrollable and irritable child who does not know how and does not want to control himself. But the term "nervous" is vague, collective. Therefore, when we talk about a nervous baby, then in each case the so-called nervousness has a very different basis. We call children "nervous" when they are pedagogically neglected, when they have character accentuation, neuropathy and neurosis, when they have organic changes in any of the hemispheres of the brain, and we very often do not even know about them.

So, for example, a child with lesions of the frontal lobes of the brain does not lend itself to education. You reproach him, read notations, and he, not noticing this, calmly continues to shock everyone with his antics and pugnacity, slovenliness and foolishness. It is practically impossible to inspire bashfulness and explain what a sense of proportion means. And all your pedagogical methods are like "a voice crying in the wilderness." Such a child is simply not able to behave differently. Therefore, when the baby is uncontrollable, it is urgent to show him to the doctor in order to clarify the causes of deviations in the child's behavior.

Usually nervous, indeed, there are children with congenital childhood nervousness - neuropathy. There are many more such children than we think, although the birth of a child with childish nervousness can already be predicted by a number of signs that a pregnant woman has before birth. And after giving birth, making a diagnosis is even easier. Check to see if your child has it.

A child with childhood nervousness is usually much more excitable than peers. Already in the first year of life, the baby sleeps lightly all the time and does not tolerate noise well, does not want to eat and often burps. As the child grows and develops, sleep and appetite problems increase. At the age of three, as a rule, not only night sleep is disturbed, but also daytime sleep, when he simply does not want to sleep. Feeding him is a complete mess. He is very picky about food, and there are practically no foods that would stimulate his appetite. Such a child is often irritable and disinhibited. Focuses with great difficulty, but not for long. Any trifle distracts him, and restlessness and fussiness lead to a lot of unnecessary actions. The other extreme is when a child with innate nervousness is closed all the time, accumulating everything in himself. However, no matter how "extreme" the child's neuropathy proceeds, you need to remember that such a baby is usually very emotional, instantly overtired and prone to anxiety. Therefore, all your complaints only cause offense in him.

When the weather changes, in a stuffy room, during a quarrel, with excitement, such a baby can usually complain of a headache, pain in the heart and pain in the abdomen. And he really experiences these pains. In general, a baby with congenital childhood nervousness gets sick more often than his peers. He is not enduring, he has a reduced reactivity of the body and an altered metabolism.

And yet, when, raising a baby with congenital childhood nervousness, you take into account his characteristics and personality, hope for a good end result. Over time, all symptoms will disappear. Neuropathy is not a disease, but only the soil for the disease. But this soil is the best black soil for neurotic reactions and neuroses.

Neuroses are those diseases that affect many aspects of a child's personality. In preschool age, neurasthenia, anxiety neurosis, hysterical neurosis, and obsessive-compulsive disorder are most common. Each of these neuroses has a number of its own characteristics. But the main thing that unites them is an excessive tension of the nervous system in terms of strength or duration against the background or after a mental shock, against the background or after acute and chronic mental traumas and conflicts. Any situation can be traumatic for a child.

Usually each of the neuroses has its own central internal conflict that prevents it from expressing itself. You yourself will contribute to the development of neurasthenia in your own baby, all the time making demands on him that do not correspond to the capabilities of his only emerging psyche. When you very often frighten a child, and he is really afraid of the threats you throw, believing that he will not be able to protect himself, remember that sooner or later a fear neurosis may appear against this background. When a baby wants to combine incompatible desires and feelings, and you indulge this, you accelerate the development of obsessive-compulsive disorder. When you pay little attention to a child, and he strives for your affection and love, at any cost trying to remind you of himself, you provoke a hysterical neurosis. In general, usually in early childhood, neuroses are difficult to clearly distinguish from each other, and we, as a rule, are dealing with a single term "neurosis".

When your child is excitable all the time, hyperactive, irritated, angry, or, on the contrary, constantly lethargic and apathetic, overly suspicious, anxious and tearful, depressed, do not miss his neurosis and try to consult a doctor in a timely manner. Perhaps the main cause of neurosis is your upbringing, especially your view of "can" and "should not."

Often in children there is a situationally conditioned nervousness. Its causes are various, but it is not a disease. The kid is situationally nervous during the crisis of stubbornness, proving to everyone "I am myself." The baby is situationally nervous when he is only the only child in the family, and loving mom and dad, as well as grandparents are unable to divide him, literally "tear him apart" The child can become suddenly nervous when a baby suddenly appears in the family, to to which your first-born is jealous, or when a stepfather comes to the family, with whom the baby "fights" for his mother.

Situational nervousness is found in virtually all children in a family in which the parents have recently divorced or when a divorce is just brewing. Situationally conditioned nervousness... How many situations provoke it. In practice, they are difficult to count. And yet all these situations to some extent, and sometimes completely depend or depend on you.

From this nervousness is only a step towards neurosis, which can "maim" the baby and be his companion all his life.

So, you see, there are many forms of childhood nervousness: congenital, acquired. And yet, when it comes to nervous children, think about what you are to blame for and why such a child did not appear somewhere, but precisely with you. Remember, a nervous child usually has nervous parents, and he only imitates the style of behavior in the family.

How parents should behave with a "nervous" child:

• Find the causes of nervousness and try to smooth them out.
• Reconsider the style of relationships in the family and not share the love of the child between loved ones. Do not force him to love everyone equally.
• Think about whether there is a good reason for the divorce and whether you really need a divorce. How to make sure that the baby is not a victim.
• Find all the cracks in your relationship with your child.
• Do not infringe on his dignity and pride. Do not control the child like a robot.
• Do not demand the impossible from the baby.
• Prepare in advance for the appearance of a newborn in the family. Do not incite jealousy in him towards other children.
• Understand the child and try to evaluate the bad deed from his position.
• Help him during the crisis of three years.
• To "educate" him alone, not to abuse his endless "can't" and "possible".
• Hide your nervousness in depth and do not throw tantrums at him or with him.
• Try not to show your fear.
• Harden. Follow your doctor's instructions at all times.

How not to behave parents with a "nervous" child:

• Specially cultivate the causes of "nervousness".
• Trying to annoy and "charge" the child with his methods of upbringing, his "possible" and "impossible".
• To infringe on his dignity all the time, to control the child like a robot.
• Try to incite conflict in the family, strive for an unreasonable divorce and pull the child like a rope - from mom to dad and vice versa.
• Try to share the child's love among all relatives and friends equally, jealously observing this.
• All the time to demand from the baby the impossible.
• Emphasize your love for the newborn and specifically cause the child to be jealous of other children in the family.
• To eradicate his stubbornness during the crisis of three years.
• Being agitated, angry, and angry when interacting with your child.
• Throw him tantrums, get scared in front of his eyes.
• Contribute to the development of neurosis.
• Do not follow doctor's advice.

Why are children "nervous"?

• When blaming your child for being overly nervous, think for a moment: is this your fault? And if so, what is it and are you really guilty?
• It is very difficult to answer: really or not, in the full sense of the word, but in advance, in advance of the birth of the baby, you could already foresee his future "nervous" character and try to prevent this "nervousness" by any means. So a very big responsibility lies with the pregnant woman.
• Any future mother needs to create a special “comfort” for the fetus, ensure its safety, protect her baby, even if not yet born, but striving to live. And for this you need to sacrifice a lot, give up your desires, give up old habits and views, change your lifestyle. Any expectant mother must do everything in her power so that various harmful substances do not affect the nervous system of the fetus in utero. Well, harmfulness is smoking, alcoholism, even a small sip of champagne is poison. All infections during pregnancy, from SARS to the most dangerous ones, are also a threat and a risk of damage to the fetal nervous system. Aborted miscarriage, Rh incompatibility, various medications...
• In a word, the unborn child is in danger at every step. There are some that can be prevented because they are manageable. Among them, conflicts in the family are the most traumatic for a woman. All conflicts are like time bombs for a pregnant woman! They are the main source of her mental discomfort. And mental discomfort is reflected even in the blood counts, and not only of the pregnant woman, but also of the fetus, which will respond later when the fetus has already become a child.
• When the expectant mother does not need a baby, when he, unborn, is already unwanted and all the thoughts of a pregnant woman about a baby as a terrible burden in her personal life, then the child, having been born, with his wild temper, seems to take revenge on everyone for this and willy-nilly forces that you paid him, even if you don’t feel like it, a lot of attention.
• The reason for the “nervousness” of the child can also be the emotional stress experienced by the pregnant woman during exams, tests, and conflicts at work, household expenses ... In short, any situation accompanied by excitement.
• Stress can be not only in a pregnant woman, but also in a woman in labor. It weakens labor, delays labor and causes oxygen starvation of the fetus. Therefore, any birth trauma, symptoms of prematurity and postmaturity in the future can affect the behavior of the child.
• When pregnancy and childbirth were successful, all inflammatory and mechanical damage to the brain can “neuroticize” the child. Any acute disease is capable of leaving a mark on the child's psyche for some time, especially a chronic one. When the baby seems to be capricious for no reason, examine him. The reasons can be different: from adenoids to worms.
• However, the conditions of their life, the microclimate that you create, hurt the psyche of children the most. It is difficult for a child to endure when he is either "tropical", or "sharply continental", and you, as if with a magic wand, juggle upbringing, and your end result often hits the sky.
• All educational mistakes can not be counted. And most of the time it's the mother's fault. The kid imitates her all the time, trying to be like her. So when she is capricious, he is capricious, she is irritated, he is irritable, she is selfish, he is selfish. In short, her double appears in the house, a copy from the original - a baby with the same disposition and character. No wonder they say: "A nervous mother has a nervous child."
• The child is neurotic for a number of reasons: he is very often restless when he does not get enough sleep, when he spends his whole day watching television programs, when he listens to terrible stories and fairy tales, when he goes to visit, where it is very noisy or crowded. An uncontrollable child often happens in a family where two generations "cross swords": fathers and children, his parents and their parents. Usually in these families everyone "breaks spears" to prove how to properly raise a child. And if the mother says "it is possible", then the grandmother repeats in response "it is impossible". The kid is at a loss who to believe, preferring those who say "you can." And you, indulging the desires of the child, are unlikely to know that this greatly weakens the processes of his inhibition, accompanied by a number of neurotic reactions.
• Such reactions are also subject to the child whom you "tame" with a belt. Any "physical" form of punishment is accompanied by a reaction of protest.
• All spoiled children are capricious too, especially when they are praised without limit, suggesting that they are unique. Their high self-esteem often leads to conflict situations. Such a baby cannot adapt to the garden. In the circle of his peers, his uniqueness is not visible. But he often lags behind them in many development skills: he cannot dress himself, make the bed, does not know how to lace up his shoes. All this causes criticism, ridicule. After all, there are strict laws in the children's team. The kid does not want to come to terms with this and ... protests.
• His protest reaction reaches its climax when a newborn suddenly appears in the family, and mom and dad give all preference to him. Unexpected, unforeseen blow of fate. He was betrayed... Betrayed for the sake of a clumsy - a fool who does not understand anything, but only screams and cries day and night. And in order to remind yourself, jealous, your child arranges scenes, and those that cannot be ignored. And now you involuntarily need to remember that there is another baby in the house, quite smart, a little helper you can rely on. So, perhaps, there is nothing to think about which of the two is worthy of preference.
• Even more than the birth of a baby, it traumatizes the child, making the breakup of the family uncontrollable. He needs both mom and dad. He loves them both at the same time. The departure of one of them from home is an unbearable tragedy. A little earlier, he was unwittingly a witness to conflicts, a participant in them and a judge. All this deeply sunk into the soul. He became as if electrified and was able to discharge himself over the slightest trifles.
• The fact of being born in a family where there is no father often makes a child neurotic, especially when he grows up and begins to realize this.
• Perhaps, as a sunflower reaches for the sun, so your child - for love for you. And suddenly, one day, he involuntarily discovers that mom and dad pay more attention to him when he does something differently than is customary around. When he behaves “as it should”, they are always busy with themselves, with their urgent affairs, and they probably don’t need him then. But he does not want to come to terms with this. And he acts ... at any cost, defending his "I". And we wonder why the child is nervous.

How parents should behave so that the child is not nervous:

• Long before the birth, take care of his health.
• Give up bad habits and establish a healthy lifestyle.
• Beware of infections and observe all anti-infective measures.
• Constantly be under supervision in the antenatal clinic.
• Avoid emotional overload and psychological trauma.
• Discharge the conflict situation in the family.
• From the first days of pregnancy, to think about a child in sunny colors, to wait for him, as the greatest joy in life.
• Take a course of psychoprophylaxis before childbirth, prevent birth stress.
• From the very first days of a child's life, create mental comfort for him.
• Don't get angry, be patient. Always remember that you are a role model.
• Find a common educational approach for all adults.
• Do not overestimate the capabilities of the child and do not inspire him that he is unique.
• In no case should you humiliate the dignity of the child with your methods of punishment.
• Always be friendly and tactful with him.
• When a newborn appears in the family, do everything so that the baby does not feel unnecessary.
• Try to avoid divorce and save the family.
• Your child should not be a "tool" in the fight against each other. He is not a judge in conflicts.
• Protect your baby from injuries and from diseases that mainly affect the nervous system.
• Pay maximum attention to a child who has just been ill with something.
• Harden your baby and train his nervous system.

How not to behave parents with a nervous child:

• Do not take care of the health of the unborn child.
• Drink alcohol and smoke during pregnancy.
• Do not comply with anti-infective measures.
• During pregnancy, think about the unborn child as a future burden.
• Create and be an active participant in conflict situations.
• Do not take care of the psychoprophylaxis of childbirth.
• Raising a child in ways that lead to mental discomfort. Conflict in front of the child.
• Use it as a means of fighting between spouses. "Share" between parents who want to separate.
• When a newborn appears in the family, deprive the child of his former love and affection.
• Ignore the injuries and illnesses of the baby.
• Do not temper and do not specially train his nervous system.

Comment on the article "And children have nerves at the limit"

Right there, you can row the loot like, don’t look that the trolleybuses are again turning into cattle trucks, straight hello from the 80s. no, not within. But you will have to pay for parking in residential areas.

Discussion

I would suggest making paid parking for out-of-towners. You can peck me.

As expected, the signs were put up in the summer and the markings were drawn. When buying a car, you need to think about where you will put it and whether it is cheaper to ride the subway and taxi. I know for sure that OT is cheaper. The car is your own comfort at the expense of the environment and other people. If you want this comfort - pay.

Already the nerves are on edge. USE and other exams. Teenagers. Already the nerves are on edge ..... MSLU Maurice Thorez has not posted the lists yet ... I'm sitting at work, I can't work (.

Vegetovascular dystonia (VVD) is a complex, more often functional, disorders of the body associated with dysregulation of the peripheral or central part of the autonomic nervous system. At the present stage, VVD is not considered as an independent disease. Basically, it is a consequence or manifestation of any somatic, infectious, traumatic, toxic and emotional disorder that makes the nervous system work with increased stress. Autonomic nervous...

And the second child really wanted a female :) After the ultrasound, she sobbed for almost a day, it also coincided that the first time the gender was said during hospitalization, it also coincided that the nerves were at the limit anyway. Then there was still a glimmer of hope that they had mixed up ...

Discussion

It was like that for me too. The eldest was almost 8 when they found out that the second boy. The husband grumbled, the mother-in-law even offended and brought to tears. A couple of years later she became pregnant "accidentally" and a girl was born. And in the end, Kiryushka (the 2nd child) is now all the same for everyone (except for me, of course, I love everyone equally) the most precious.

I wanted an older boy. And the second child really wanted a female :) After the ultrasound, she sobbed for almost a day, it also coincided that the first time the gender was said during hospitalization, it also coincided that the nerves were at the limit anyway.
Then there was still a glimmer of hope that they had mixed up, they again upset me at the 3D ultrasound, saying that there was not even a doubt. True, at that time I accepted it more calmly, but it was sad. even a few days before the birth, the doctor asked if the boy was accurately identified for us. "Something I do not see the boy."
Well, what can I say ... We are used to childbirth :) And for 7 years we have been very fond of our boy. Yes, sometimes it's sad that the girls didn't happen. But it's just sad in the abstract, because in general it happened that way. Without reference to a specific child, then the son is a boy and not a girl, I have not regretted it even once for 7 years already. These are my best and favorite children for me. And thank you for having them, everything else is such nonsense :) Your little ball of happiness will plop on your stomach, forget all your worries :))

When treating a child with a cold, mothers may come across erroneous recommendations that not only do not help the baby recover, but sometimes even are dangerous for his health. We propose to consider the most common mistakes and misconceptions in the treatment of respiratory infections in children. "The temperature must be brought down urgently" An increase in body temperature is a protective reaction of the child's body, the purpose of which is to destroy the infection. Bringing down the temperature already at...

Discussion

A good article and useful tips for young parents) I remember with my first child I didn’t know anything at all and even a runny nose in a baby made me panic)

Yes, our ENT prescribed us recently, with regular snot - Umckalor. It is an antimicrobial agent of plant origin. It should be given 3 times a day on an empty stomach, dosage according to the instructions, according to age.
In our case (adenoids), the drug helped very well, after a week the daughter began to breathe well at night, her nose stopped stuffing up.

Last night, after the children returned from the camp, the festive dinner and the departure of the soup, the children said that dad suggested that they go to the cinema on the weekend "four of them, along with his new aunt, because he loves her very much, soon they will live together, and he wants to introduce them to each other" O_O The children refused with the words "the four of us want to go only with you and mom", the soup did not insist ... The children "want to see dad, not dad in company with another aunt", as they told me explained your answer... I...

Discussion

From my own experience. The husband (already ex) introduced our children of 9 and 4 years old to his beloved when we were still married. The children liked her, of course: she also wanted to impress them: a kind, affectionate aunt. Because my husband immediately moved in with her from our house, then he took the children to her for the weekend. The children were not opposed: she pampered them. I freaked out and took sedatives. And so far (they have not signed yet), she behaves like this. There are excesses: he calls my eldest and says how much he misses him, how he loves, he is waiting for a visit. I immediately call my husband (used) and say not to mislead the children, in my opinion this is a farce ... He listens, she does not call for a while, but writes to her son in classmates ... In short , go with the flow. The situation is simplified by the fact that now her son will live with her - 7 years old, and the children are by no means friends, he also calls BM "dad", which angers mine))) Good luck to you, wisdom and patience !!!

And how was the word "maromoyka" born? Who is this anyway? "Soup" - of course, it's short for "husband". And "maromoyka"?

An unpleasant situation happened to us, the other day .. On Friday, we were walking home from the site, from the window of the 9th floor, they first threw an apple at us, which fell next to Dasha, and then a bag of water that flew ten centimeters from Timka's head. This already happened once, a couple of years ago, we then suspected the wrong apartment .. but that was in the past .. this time, half an hour before us, they launched an egg into the car of a friend who had just parked ... well, actually I I stand looking at the windows, I ...

Discussion

There is a council, do the following: when you or your child, no matter where a big bruise appears from, go to the police and write a statement that "HIT an apple."
And so every time, I think, there is still a different category than "flying past" and there will be a council (maybe Yuyu will turn on and the child will be taken to a boarding school, because the problem is not in the child, but in the mother, who does not do her job - to raise children ).

Anastasia, I'm not blaming you for anything! And I don't really blame anyone!
I'm not defending a child who almost harmed .... it's just wild for me in this situation that mothers advise another mother to carry out reprisals against a 10-year-old child.
IMHO .. but I think that this is not a problem with the child .. but with his unlucky mother, who scored X on him and he grows on his own. Children don't grow up to be monsters, their parents make them that way.
I don't know if this is the problem of the whole yard..then why don't you get together as mommies and shake this child's mom...why direct aggression at a 10 year old?
and living in such an aggressive society, what do you all expect from children? Where do you think they got all this from? from children's books? No! they look at adults and repeat their own actions and words! We are teaching children about violence!
I wish you all the best!

Preparing for pregnancy with her husband carefully. And here is the long-awaited 2 strips. I decided to wait until 3 weeks and go to a paid clinic (where they prepared us for pregnancy) to do an ultrasound and make sure that the baby is there and he is where he needs to be. I came there to please my doctor, they sent me for an ultrasound. Pregnancy is uterine, everything is ok. They said to come back in 10 days. They did a new ultrasound at the 5th week, and oh horror. The doctor rushed about ... no heartbeat, missed pregnancy. Oh come on tomorrow morning again...

Hello! Tell me what to do: my son is 7 years old, then he told his grandmother that sometimes he doesn’t want to live, when my mother offends me (I’ll scream for something or slap), I’m sitting in the room, and I have a voice in my head “kill yourself ", after all, you can jump off the roof or from the stairs (we have a Swedish wall at home) jump onto something sharp ... Grandmother tells him "Dimochka, you will die then," and he answers her: "Grandma, but the soul will remain "... I'm shocked how to talk properly and save my son from these thoughts...

Discussion

Hello!

Unfortunately, I do not know your situation in detail, what is happening in your family and on what basis relationships with a child are built. But I'll tell you honestly - what you write about is a serious call that needs to be paid close attention. I really want to help you, but, unfortunately, online communication has its limitations. I can consider and evaluate your situation only approximately.

What is mom? Mom is the person who gave life, the closest person for any child. You write that when you offend your child, shout at him, spank him, he does not want to live. Mom's love is as necessary to your son as the air he breathes.

Ask yourself - why do you offend him? What need do you have to spank and yell at a seven year old? After all, what is screaming and spanking? This is one type of violence. Probably, being unable to influence the child calmly, you resort to this method of "education". Put yourself in his place. For example, your husband comes up to you and says - do this and that. For some reason you refuse. He goes to scream. You don't want to again. A couple of slaps in your address "complete the negotiations." I think you, this way of communication will be unpleasant.

Understand yourself. Are you all right inside? After all, if the mother is calm, the child is also calm. If the relationship with the child is built correctly, there is no need to raise your voice and even more so to fight. Calmly explain what you want from him, listen to his opinion. The main thing is that you yourself clearly understand what you want from your son and whether you really need it.

Let me give you an example: my mother is collecting her son for kindergarten, urging him on - come on quickly, you need to be in time for the kindergarten, and I need to go to work. And he thinks to himself: “How can I not like this work, why should I go there every day? I hate what I do. If I didn’t need money, I wouldn’t go to an unloved job, but would sit at home with the child, and I wouldn’t have to take him to the garden, where there are only diseases, etc. and so on." Thoughts are entirely negative, well-being is appropriate. Mom is all on her nerves, on edge. The child feels all this and, “reflecting” the state of the mother, shouts at the top of his lungs: “I don’t want to go to kindergarten. Will not go". "Oh, won't you go? - then a familiar situation is played out with a scream and cracks ...

What did the child do? In this case, he expressed aloud what his mother had been thinking hard about all the last time, he just “reflected” her condition. Mom does not want to take the child to the kindergarten for such and such a reason, and even less - to work. She internally does not want the child to go to kindergarten - she is afraid that he will get sick. She doesn't want to, but she forces him. That is, he thinks and feels one thing, but says something completely different out loud.
This discrepancy is expressed aloud by her child.

Talk to your son. What worries him? What does he lack? If this is a lack of attention on your part, try to give it as much time as possible. If this is a reaction to your screaming and spanking, immediately stop this type of communication and start giving your son more love and tenderness. Calm yourself internally.

If the situation does not improve, be sure to show your son to a good child psychologist.

By the way, on my website www.schastie.info I conduct a free newsletter. You can subscribe and regularly receive advice and recommendations on improving the quality of your life, health, improving relationships with loved ones, self-realization, finding your favorite thing and much more.

Sincerely,
Tatiana Gorchakova

Kutuzov was extremely pleased with what was happening: finally, his style of warfare was appreciated! It is a pity, really, that the first to do this were the enemies, and not the compatriots! The field marshal informed de Lauriston with pleasure that not a single envoy of Napoleon would be allowed into Petersburg with a letter to Alexander, he, they say, would himself inform the sovereign about the French peace proposal. In a reply letter to Napoleon, written a few days later, he mockingly complained that "taking into account ...

Discussion

“What terrible, destructive wars will follow my first retreat!” === Perhaps Napoleon understood that in the event of his defeat, England would come out on top, and in Anglo-American capitalism, the natives are all who live outside the known islands ( c) with all the consequences. And, as we see from history and from the news, Napoleon was not mistaken.

Napoleon finally lost his nerve. Having turned onto the Smolensk road, he began his retreat in the same way that he had come to Russia === And what was left for him? There is nothing to winter the army with, in Moscow all the food that they could - they took out, what they couldn’t - they burned, Kutuzov does not let him go on the Kaluga road, it’s impossible to conclude peace. So the Frenchman had to retreat to the places already plundered by him.

Do you want to know what the perfect nanny looks like? Do not flatter yourself, ideal nannies, as well as ideal husbands, wives, children, etc. just doesn't exist. A nanny can be a professional in her field, an amateur, a beginner or just a person who wants to retrain as a nanny. So how, after all, to distinguish a professional nanny from any other. She just needs to have a certain set of knowledge, skills and human qualities that can help her become this very professional. So...

Does the fact that in the morning they have to wake up early in order to be taken to a nursery or kindergarten affect the children? Children cry, get nervous, parents get annoyed, sometimes yell at them. How does all this affect the nervous system of the child? If a child has to wake up in the morning and he cries when he wakes up, of course, this injures him. Why doesn't he wake up at his usual time? Maybe the child had a different daily routine and he got up later? On those days when the baby goes to a nursery or kindergarten, he needs ...

Generations of current mothers and grandmothers went to school with pleasure. Skipping. With bouquets at the ready. We were curious! We had brand new briefcases and notebooks! We were looking for new friends. We mastered a new stage of development - so mature that we go to school ourselves! And how many children I now see who are afraid to go to school. They hide behind their mother, crying “I can’t, I won’t succeed!” Comrades, gentlemen, parents and teachers. How did we get to such a life that 6-7 year old children are afraid of not ...

Discussion

I don't understand the connection between anxiety and the ability to read. My child came to school with preparation - and thank God, because the entire first grade was solving other organizational problems (how not to forget things at home, etc.). I went with pleasure and still (2nd grade) studies with pleasure - but this is because the teachers and the class are good. In terms of education, I'm a pretty tough mother. It's not that I want the child to study for fives, etc., I just don’t scold her for her grades. But it is important for me that a child develops an understanding of the unconditional value of knowledge from childhood. So that she understands: she will have to study all her life, study is work, albeit incredibly exciting. Before my eyes are examples of lazy children who are already bored in grades 2-3. They were missed in the first grade, some percentage of them, maybe, will "wake up" later, but most - I'm sure - will never catch the buzz "to work with their heads".

04/02/2011 05:00:36, manga

What is characteristic - falls asleep anyway at one o'clock. Because he sleeps during the day.
But when he got tired in the garden in winter, he fell asleep on the way home. Daytime sleep was from 8.30 pm to 11.
Sleep is the most important thing, I think. What is typical - I have the same. "Hold on by all means." So - really, it would be nice to have a psychologist. But where can I get it?!
But mine tolerates more or less. Those. Hysteria is within the normal range (now, 4.5 - once a month only happens).
And "pretend that you are sleeping" - does not work. Quietly doing his own thing. And I really sleep :-)

We had this, up to 3.2 (((We hung ourselves, it seemed that we would never sleep normally.
But you know, as the neuropathologist promised us, that "this" will pass after 3 years, and so it went by itself. What is "it" really NOBODY could explain ...

But loading to the limit ... sounds somehow bad - I would have formulated it differently, not to the limit, but to the personal norm, as much as the child takes and does not deteriorate from this, but rejoices. You are something very impressionable ;-). You can see everything - he became a little more nervous, whiny ...

Discussion

a classmate of my eldest son had: they sent him to school at 5 and 8 in the class of seven-year-olds, the first grade was taken care of and looked after, then they pressed very hard - there was a setting to be the best, they controlled every breath, plus a bunch of extra classes.
As a result, he fell to the floor at assessments that did not suit him, threw tantrums.
Parents dragged him to psychologists, stopped going to school for about a month, and from the next. years moved to another school.
The boy was very lively, sociable and unproblematic until he was tired.

I wonder if the ugly behavior is related to overload? I will probably buy a humidifier. Don't run around with wet towels. We had problems everywhere literally, wherever you look. I'm talking about aggressiveness.

What do we have now. We arrive from the garden at 5 pm (by the way, she is insane at 5 pm, she gets very tired in the garden by this time, so I think - how can yours stand up to 7-30 ??).
And EVERY EVENING the same thing - the first thing that happens is a HYSTERIC on the threshold of the house - wallowing on the floor to a burgundy state, refusing to enter the house. At first they scared the neighbors - they ran out and asked if something had happened. :((
Further, beating everything that comes to hand - mom, walls, toys, doors - it doesn't matter - everything is kicked in boots, furiously, horror is just ...

My God, what have I tried to calm her down. You know, we have been going to the garden for 2.6 years, and almost every evening - we have the same thing when we return home ....

But I also have a younger son. Therefore, when we come, I try to behave as calmly as possible, do everything in order, as we have according to the regime - we undress, wash, have dinner, play. At the same time, I repeat to her that I still have her brother, so I cannot concentrate ONLY on her.

I had a period when I thought that I couldn’t do it anymore, it happened that my daughter was beating ...
But then I read Serzov's book "A Child with High Demands", and I understood a lot.

I think you are not in our case - apparently you are now in such a period. And it will pass, and your task is to endure it with dignity, without harming either yourself or your son.
A psychologist is the best option, if I had the opportunity, I would not hesitate, I would be like a psychologist.
In the meantime, I'm trying to find the reasons myself, I read books on children's upbringing, I analyze. It happens with us - one day does not work, what worked yesterday - you have to change approaches to the child. I try to avoid tantrums - but often it doesn’t work out, because I have another child, a younger one, and often I don’t have time on time.

Write, if anything - let's talk :))

I could recommend you some books by one American author: John Rosemond, "Six point plan for raising happy healthy children", "Parent Power" and "How to raise a non-violent child". You can start with "Parent Power". In addition to the fact that the books give a lot of practical advice and recommendations, they are also very fun to read. There are also very truthful and realistic assessments of contemporary American society. I hope you find them helpful and enjoyable. Good luck!
P.S. I had a similar period this winter. But they broke through. Probably, this is another crisis when the child began to assert himself. The difficult stage at work will end, and everything will fall into place. Dont be upset!

02.11.2000 12:37:02, Victoria

Almost all parents sooner or later face the disobedience of their children. It is necessary to identify the cause and effect of the whims and tantrums of your child. Most often, it is possible to correct a child's behavior, but only by changing the principles of education.

The nervous state of the baby implies increased excitability, behavioral changes in the period of sleep and wakefulness, hysteria, and frequent irritation.

Communication with a capricious child can be very difficult.

It is difficult for parents to remain calm when the child reacts with hysteria to any request. But most of all, this behavior harms the baby himself.

Nervous children are not able to adequately communicate with their peers, enjoy life and play carefree.

Scientists and doctors believe that improper upbringing at a very early age is the cause of the manifestation of neurosis in children.

There is a direct link between a child's bad behavior and his nervous state. It is very difficult to identify the true culprit of the situation. Both parents and children themselves indirectly influence each other.

The main reasons for child disobedience include:

• Attracting the attention of adults

With a lack of affection and care, the child instinctively begins to provoke parents to a vivid manifestation of emotions.

The child's brain immediately notices that when committing any misconduct, parents instantly turn all their attention to it.

• Excessive child custody

A child who is surrounded by constant control and prohibitions cannot be independent.

In order to defend his point of view and expand the zone of free action, the baby begins to show disobedience.

• Grievances of a child, even the most insignificant in an adult look, leave an indelible mark on his soul

With strong quarrels of parents, with a rash deception of a child, or with the wrong behavior of others, children may have a desire to take revenge.

• Toddler disorder when he can't do something on his own

This is especially true for things that are easily done by others.

• Loss of self-confidence

With frequent humiliation and pulling of the child, nitpicking and admonitions, in the absence of praise and kind words, the baby's self-esteem is greatly reduced. Comparison with other children also negatively affects the psyche.

• Unhealthy family environment

With frequent quarrels of parents, screams and insults, the anxiety of small family members increases, isolation develops and disobedience manifests itself.

• Lack of vocabulary and incorrect expression of emotions

It can be difficult for young children to properly express their thoughts and feelings.

• The presence of mental disorders and pathologies of the nervous system.

The model of children's behavior is closely related to psycho-emotional development. Only with serious neurological diseases can disobedience be considered a disease.

In all other cases, the whims and tantrums of the baby should encourage parents to reconsider their parenting methods. If you suspect that there is hyperactivity, consult a pediatric neurologist, he will be able to determine if there are violations in your case.

In the next article we will tell you what it is.

Causes and symptoms of childhood neuroses

The children's nervous system is not yet formed, so it easily lends itself to various disorders and diseases.

The attention of parents should immediately concentrate on the inexplicable whims of their child.

Tantrums and disobedience should be a reason for action.

Resentments, lack of attention and mental stress accumulate and gradually turn into a painful neurosis in a child.

Doctors believe that a child's mental disorder in various stressful situations leads precisely to neurosis. This condition causes inadequate actions of the baby.



Expert opinion

Particular attention of parents should be paid to the behavior of the child at the age of mental development. These are the age from 2 to 4 years, from 5 to 8 years and adolescence.

Usually neurosis manifests itself in the region of 5-6 years. But the first warning signs can be observed much earlier.

The main causes of mental disorders in children are:

• Psychologically difficult situations that traumatize the nervous system.

This may be an adaptation period in society and the associated communication difficulties, parental quarrels.

• Severe psychological impact that caused the child to be frightened.

Or frequent overexcitation of the nervous system.

• Lack of attention and parental care.
• Rigidity and excessive severity of education.
• Relationships between adults and the emotional background within the family.
• Jealousy caused by the appearance of a younger child.

External events occurring around the baby can also cause neurosis. Take care of the child's nervous system!

The first symptoms indicating the presence of a disease of the nervous system:

• Anxiety, unreasonable fears, tearfulness
• Troubled sleep (with frequent awakenings, difficulty falling asleep)
• Cough
• Speech problems (stuttering)
• Digestive problems, stool disorders
• Difficulties in interacting with people

Excessive excitability and aggressiveness, the closed behavior of the baby is a wake-up call for adults.



Expert opinion

Klimenko Natalya Gennadievna - psychologist

Practicing psychologist at municipal antenatal clinic

With such questions, it is advisable to immediately contact a specialist. He will explain to you what you need to do to strengthen the nervous system. Passive behavior of parents is fraught with a more serious development of the disease.

In the future, these children have difficulties in life: lack of communication skills, indecision, fear of difficult problems.

If the normal rhythm of life is disturbed by the disobedience and tantrums of the child, then you should seek help.

A comprehensive solution to problems will help the child in normal psychological development.

Nervous tic in a child: signs and causes

A nervous tic in a baby is an involuntary movement of a muscle group, which he is not able to control.

According to doctors, one in five children experience short-term stuttering at least once in their lives.

In 10% of children, the disease occurs in a chronic form.

Such horrifying figures indicate that a large number of children and adolescents suffer from communication difficulties, complexes and self-doubt.

The problem is very serious, and causes a lot of negative consequences, especially in adulthood.

There are three main types of children's nervous tics:

1. ritual.

Clenching teeth, scratching certain parts of the body (ears, nose), pulling hair.

2. Motor.

Involuntary grimaces (frequent blinking, furrowed eyebrows), lip bite, twitching limbs.

3. Vocal.

These include all involuntary sounds (hissing, coughing, grunting, and others).

Nervous tics can also be divided according to the degree of manifestation:

• Local

With the action of only one muscle group.

• Multiple

Movements are made by several muscle groups at once.

Tics are also divided according to the type of occurrence.

The primary course of the disease can be caused by:

Have you noticed signs of a nervous tic in a child?

YesNo

• Lack of useful trace elements in the body with an unbalanced diet.
• Psycho-emotional problems.
• The use of a large number of drinks that affect the nervous state.
• hereditary predisposition.

In 50% of cases, a nervous tic is transmitted from parents to children.

• Excessive fatigue.

A secondary type of nervous tic can develop if there are problems:

• Injuries and neoplasms of the brain
• Pathologies of the nervous system
• Encephalitis

The disease affects the child's sleep. Children are more difficult to fall asleep and sleep restlessly.

If you are desperate to find a common language with your child, then you should definitely read Julia Gippenreiter's books “The Most Important Book for Parents” or “Communicate with a Child. How?"

Also, methods for resolving conflict situations are described in great detail in the books of another child psychologist, Lyudmila Petranovskaya: “If it’s difficult with a child” and “Secret support. Attachment in a Child's Life". These books are real bestsellers, they have helped bring peace to many families, you should try it too.

Nervous tic treatment

The appearance of a nervous tic in a child should alert parents. You should consult a doctor if the following symptoms are observed:

For the effective treatment of a nervous tic, it is necessary to create a favorable and calm home environment, organize the correct daily routine, take long walks, play sports, and have a balanced diet.

Herbal decoctions are used as folk remedies: chamomile, motherwort, valerian, hawthorn.

Expert opinion

Klimenko Natalya Gennadievna - psychologist

Practicing psychologist at municipal antenatal clinic

Treatment of the disease also depends on age. In children from 3 to 6 years of age, the course of the disease will be unpredictable. Even with recovery and the disappearance of symptoms, it is necessary to monitor the condition of the child daily, until the end of adolescence.

The appearance of ticks in babies under the age of 3 years is especially dangerous. This is possible in the presence of serious diseases.

Tics that occur in children between the ages of 6 and 8 are the easiest to treat and usually don't recur.

Raising Nervous Children

Effective treatment of neurosis in children can be carried out only in the complex interaction of the doctor and parents.

Special types of therapy, drug treatment and adult help will help save the baby from a nervous breakdown.

The child will no longer experience shyness and embarrassment, will become more active and cheerful.

The work of parents in this matter is very important. It is necessary to provide a comfortable environment for the child, to find out the causes of nervous breakdowns.

Squeezed into the strict framework of education, the child must receive his share of independence. It is not necessary to control every step of the baby. Every mom needs to properly prioritize time.

You can set aside a certain hour or two a day when she will be completely focused on communicating with her child.

It is the responsibility of every parent to raise a normal, psychologically healthy child. A harmonious and calm environment will allow you to grow a person with a healthy nervous system from a baby.

Crises in children

Problems in communication between adults and children arise at certain periods when the child's psyche is most susceptible to negative influence.

There are 4 periods of crisis:

1. From 1 to 1.5 years.

A small person is not able to combine his desires and possibilities.

2. From 2.5 to 3 years.

The manifestation of excessive independence in a child, with which he cannot cope, due to his age.

3. From 6 to 7 years.

This period is closely connected with going to school for the first time. Understanding the difficult state of the child, the patience and attention of parents will help the baby cope with the first steps in adulthood.

4. After 10 years.

The period of adolescence associated with youthful maximalism is close. A clear desire to divide the whole world into "good" and "bad".

Parents will need the utmost honesty in communication, respect for the little person and patience.

There is no clear division of crises by age. In each case, the child develops individually. And these or those actions appear at different times.

"Difficult" children

In certain life situations, obedient children turn into capricious little tyrants.

The calmness of parents in any situation is the key to success

Do you manage to stay calm while punishing your child?

NoYes

An even and calm tone of adults, even when punishing a child, is of great importance.

Make sure that the child always understands the reason for the punishment.

A good example for a child is the best method of education

By example, you can convince the baby to do what is right.

The words "do as I say" do not work for children. The behavior of the crumbs is always a reflection of the behavior of the parents.

You should always listen carefully to the child, especially at an older age (after 10 years)
Children can already argue their actions, and parents should make it clear that discussion of the problem is always possible.

Children must understand that after any action there will be consequences.

It is important to say them so that the baby learns.

With control over their behavior and regular analysis of situations of disobedience, parents can easily cope with raising children.

Doctor Komarovsky about naughty children

According to the famous doctor Komarovsky, the correct and inflexible behavior of adults, consistency and their adherence to principles, allows you to correct even the most naughty and noisy child.

Having steadfastly withstood children's tantrums, and not succumbing to manipulation, the baby will soon realize that he will not be able to achieve anything by shouting.

Raising children is a complex process that requires the full commitment of all family members. Competent and trusting building of relationships, calmness and patience of parents, will allow to re-educate even the most naughty and irritable baby.

Expecting a child is always full of joyful dreams, plans and hopes. Parents paint their future life with a baby in bright colors. The son or daughter will be beautiful, smart and always obedient. The reality turns out to be somewhat different. The long-awaited baby is really the most beautiful, intelligent and beloved, and sometimes even obedient. However, closer to two years, the character of the baby begins to change. So much so that parents stop recognizing their child.

It becomes extremely difficult to cope with a child. More recently, he is so sweet and accommodating, he becomes capricious, hysterical and strives to do everything his own way. Of course, parents are aware that between two and three years the child enters its first transitional age.

Psychologists call this period the “crisis of two years of age”. He's still a very small child - 2 years old. Often freaks out and is capricious. However, this knowledge does not make it easier. Life next to the little tyrant becomes simply unbearable. The kid, so obedient and cute, suddenly becomes stubborn and capricious. Tantrums occur many times and out of nowhere. Moreover, if the child set out to get what he wants, then it will not be possible to distract him by switching his attention to something else. The kid will stand on his own to the last.

Confusion of parents

Most parents are unprepared for such changes. What happens to the child takes them by surprise. Even if the baby has an older brother or sister and the parents have already gone through something similar, still always throwing tantrums, a nervous child creates an unbearable atmosphere in the house. Parents, frightened by the thought that the baby may have serious health problems, seek help from experienced acquaintances. However, few people dare to turn to a specialist and get advice from a child psychologist.

The advice of the townsfolk in such cases is given of the same type. Most tend to think that the child just needs to be "asked properly" so that he knows how to behave. However, such methods do not bring benefits. The child is nervous and freaks out even more, bringing loved ones with his behavior literally to

How it manifests itself - the age of testing

Most often, the baby resorts to a violent demonstration of his discontent. Falls to the floor, scatters things, hits parents, breaks toys. Moreover, reasons for discontent sometimes arise from scratch. For example, a child wants water. Mom gives him a bottle, which immediately flies to the floor. It turns out that the baby wanted the bottle to be full, but it was only half filled; or the kid yesterday ran through the puddles in rubber boots and wants to put them on today too. Explanations that today the sun and boots are not needed on the street do not help. The child throws a tantrum.

It must be said that parents are sometimes not afraid of the hysteria itself, but the reaction of those around them. In a situation where your child is constantly freaking out or rolling around screaming on the floor, it is difficult to remain calm. Especially if it happens in a public place full of "well-wishers". Mothers are at a loss. What happened? What is missing in education? What to do if the child is nervous and naughty?

Most often, the parents are not to blame in such situations. It's just that the baby began his first transitional age. Child psychologists call this condition the two-year-old crisis. The cause of the crisis lies in the child himself. The kid is actively exploring the world around him, which constantly presents him with surprises. He wants to be independent, but he still cannot manage without the help of his parents. Moreover, the help itself is often actively rejected. Thus, 2 years is manifested - this is a rather difficult age for both the baby and his parents.

While the baby was very small, he felt himself one with his mother. He calmly allowed himself to be picked up and carried from place to place, fed, dressed and performed many other necessary manipulations. Starting to realize the limits of his own "I", the child simultaneously tries to find out the limits of what is permitted in relation to other people. Although sometimes it seems to parents that they are deliberately pissed off. However, this is not the case. The child learns to communicate, tries to realize how much his power over other people extends, and tries to manipulate them. Adults are required to show restraint, not succumbing to provocations.

There is no specific date when the child will begin to show character. On average, it starts at two years and ends at about three and a half years. If a small child (2 years old) often freaks out and is naughty, then this can be called the age norm. The only question is how to survive this period with the least losses.

What should parents do

This is perhaps the most sensible advice that can be given to parents who are experiencing their first crisis with their child. It is worth putting aside what is right and wrong for a while and let the child have his own experience. To the best of reason, of course.

“I myself” is the phrase parents hear most often now. I'll dress myself, I'll eat myself, I'll go for a walk myself. And it doesn't matter that it's +30 outside, but the child wanted to wear warm leggings outside. Negotiations with a stubborn kid will end in a violent tantrum. The best thing to do in such a situation is to simply allow the child to wear what he wants. Let him go outside in warm breeches. Just bring light clothing with you, and when the baby gets hot, change it. Along the way, explaining that now the sun is shining, and you need to dress lighter.

A similar situation is repeated at lunchtime. The child may want to eat sweet semolina porridge, dipping salted tomato into it. Trying to feed him “right” will only lead to him giving up on both. Let him eat what he wants and how he wants. If you can't watch it, just don't watch it.

Give your child more freedom and don't treat him like a toy. He is a human being just like you, and he also has the right to make mistakes. Your task is not to protect him from all troubles, but to help him gain his own life experience. Of course, it is much easier to dress a child yourself than to wait for him to do it himself. Just give yourself a little more time to get ready. In addition, try to listen to the opinion of the child himself. After all, he is also a person and has the right to listen to him. If it's time for lunch, and the child refuses to eat, then most likely he is not hungry yet. Go towards him. Most likely, he will soon get hungry, and you will feed him without any problems.

Connect with your child through play

Games for children 2 years old are the main way to interact with the outside world. To the question: "What do you do?", a child of 2-3 years old will probably answer: "I play." The child plays all the time. If he has toys, he will play with them. If there are no toys, then he will invent them for himself.

Often parents complain that the child has a lot of toys, but he almost never plays with them. Most often this happens when the toys are lying around anywhere, disassembled and broken. The child simply forgets about them.

In order for the child to remember his toys, they must be in front of him. To do this, it is best to keep them on open shelves. Large toys are best placed on the floor so that the baby can easily get them. Place medium-sized toys directly on the shelf. Here they will look most attractive.

All kinds of small items like small cars, figurines from Kinder Surprises, beautiful pebbles found on the street, put them in small boxes. On top of each box, put one item from those that are in it. So the child will understand where whose house is.

Do not give your child all the toys at the same time

If the child does not see all his toys at once, then he will remain interested in them longer. If too many toys have accumulated, then collect some part and hide it. after a while they can be shown to the child. He will begin to play with them with no less interest than with new ones. Of course, you should not hide those toys to which the child is very attached. Some are worth keeping where they are used most often. For example, your daughter's toy kitchen utensils can be stored in a toy box in the kitchen. This will keep your own cookware intact.

Son's toy tools can be stored next to dad's. In response to the request of the baby to give him a hammer or drill, give him his own toy tool. Bathing toys are best kept in the bathroom, and the ball he plays with outside is best placed in the hallway.

Think of activities for your child

Perhaps your child is constantly naughty due to the fact that he is simply bored. He is still very small and cannot always figure out how to play with this or that toy. In order for the baby to always be in business, get a special box for all sorts of interesting little things. At the right time, you will take out a ribbon from the box, from which you can make a leash for a teddy dog, in which he has already lost interest, or a shred for a new dress for a doll.

When playing, your baby tries to be closer to you. In his games, he will gladly accept your offer of help, but he is unlikely to want to be given instructions on what to do. Games for children 2 years old are all kinds of research, experiments and new discoveries. You should not strive to explain to him the purpose of a particular toy or rush to answer a question that he himself could not really formulate. That way you can ruin everything. Try to give the child the opportunity to be the leader in his game and follow him.

Help the child, be his partner

Your baby may think of some business, but will not be able to carry it out due to the fact that his physical abilities are still very limited. Help him, but don't do everything for him. For example, he planted a branch of a tree in the sand and now wants to water his "flower bed". Help him carry a jar of water to the sandbox, but do not pour the water yourself. After all, he wants to do it on his own. If you deprive him of such an opportunity, then the scandal cannot be avoided. The child has not yet learned how to correctly express his negative emotions, so hysteria often occurs in children. 2 years is the age at which not all children still know how to talk properly. Not being able to give weighty arguments in defense of his position, the kid throws a tantrum.

Many games are simply impossible to play on your own. You cannot catch or roll a ball if there is no one to throw it, you cannot play catch-up if there is no one to catch up with you. Often children have to beg their parents for a long time to play with them. After much persuasion, they reluctantly agree, but after a few minutes they say: "Well, that's enough, now play it yourself." Or, agreeing to play, they announce in advance that they can give the child only 10 minutes. After that, the child does not so much play as fearfully waits for the promised minutes to end and they will say to him: “Enough for today.” It is clear that you will not be able to play all day, but sometimes it is worth pretending that you yourself really want this. Give your child the opportunity to enjoy the fact that he himself finished the game when he wanted. Games for children 2 years old are their very life.

What to do if a child has a tantrum

No matter how carefully you treat a two-year-old child, situations still sometimes arise in which it will not be possible to avoid tantrums. Unfortunately, a small child (2 years old) often freaks out and is naughty. Sometimes he has tantrums. According to statistics, more than half of two-year-old children are prone to tantrums and outbursts of rage. For many, this happens several times a week. Tantrum-prone kids are usually very restless, smart and know what they want. They want to do a lot of things and have a very bad attitude towards the attempts of adults to prevent them from doing this. Having met an obstacle in its path, a small child (2 years old) often freaks out and is capricious, wanting to achieve his goal.

Falling into hysterics, the baby is not able to control himself. He can't see or hear anything at all. Therefore, all objects that get in his way usually scatter in different directions. The child may fall to the floor and scream loudly. When falling, it can hit hard on the floor or furniture. Parents are usually at a loss, they do not understand why the child is freaking out, because just now everything was fine. The baby may scream until he is sick. At the same time, parents find themselves in a state close to panic, they do not know what to do if the child is nervous and naughty.

It is very difficult for parents to watch such pictures. Especially when he turns pale and it seems that he is about to lose consciousness. True, he will not cause serious harm in this way to himself. The protective reflexes of his body will come to the rescue, which will force him to take a breath long before he can suffocate.

How to help a child

First of all, you should try to organize the life of the child so that he does not have nervous overload. If the child has become nervous, the symptoms will be visible immediately. These are frequent outbursts of rage. When these outbreaks become too frequent, they will not lead to anything good. If you forbid something to the child or force him to do something that he is not very pleased with, then try to show as much gentleness as possible. Do not try to keep the child in a rigid framework. In an attempt to protect himself, the child will throw tantrums regularly.

Sometimes parents hope to improve the child's condition by self-administering sedative medication. Moreover, they "prescribe" the drugs themselves on the advice of relatives and friends. Doing this is strongly discouraged. Only a doctor can prescribe sedatives for children. 2 years is the age at which the child is still extremely vulnerable, uncontrolled use of drugs can harm him.

If the baby has a tantrum, watch him carefully so that he does not harm himself. During a child's tantrum, such that he may not remember what he did while he was rampant. So that he does not cripple himself, try to gently hold him. When he comes to his senses, he will see that you are next to him and the scandal he has arranged has not changed anything. Soon he will relax and fall asleep in your arms. The little monster will turn into a baby who needs affection and comfort. After all, this is still a small child (2 years old). He often freaks out and is capricious, but at the same time he desperately needs your love, affection and comfort.

There are children who absolutely can not stand when, during hysterical attacks, they are tried to be restrained. This only exacerbates the hysteria. In this case, do not use force. Just try to make sure that the child does not harm himself. To do this, remove from his path all the beating and easily breaking objects.

Don't try to prove something to a hysterical child. Until the attack passes, absolutely nothing will affect him. If the child is hysterical, do not yell at him. It won't make any difference. Some parents, trying to bring the child to his senses, begin to beat him. Usually, this not only does not calm him down, but, on the contrary, makes him scream even louder. In addition, you can not calculate the strength and cripple the baby.

Do not try to explain something to a screaming child. In a state of extreme irritation, even an adult is difficult to persuade. And what can we say about a two-year-old child. After he calms down, do not start the conversation first. Many children take this as a concession, and the screams may start with a vengeance.

It is better to wait until the child himself comes to you. If he comes up to you, hug him, caress him and act like nothing happened.

Often parents are horrified at the thought that their child will "throw a concert" in public. They are ready to make any concessions, as long as he does not have a tantrum. This practice leads to completely opposite results. Children are very observant and know very well how to manipulate their parents. Do not be surprised if your child starts having tantrums regularly and in the most inappropriate places.

Let your child know that tantrums will get him absolutely nothing from you. If he was furious because you forbade him to climb a high ladder, do not allow it after he calms down. If before the tantrum you planned to go for a walk with him, go as soon as there is silence, and do not remind the child of anything.

Most children's tantrums are designed for the presence of spectators. As soon as you go into another room, the screams miraculously stop. Sometimes you can observe a rather funny picture: the child screams with all his might, rolls on the floor. As soon as he finds that no one is around, he falls silent, then moves closer to his parents and starts his "concert" again.

When is the right time to see a child psychologist?

You need to contact a psychologist if the child’s tantrums have become too frequent and have become protracted. In particular, they do not pass, even if the child is left all alone. If the parents have tried all the ways, but still it is not possible to overcome the tantrums, then it is time to seek advice from a child psychologist. In order to find a good specialist, ask your friends who have already been helped by a child psychologist. Reviews will be a good guide for you. In addition, it is worth visiting a pediatric neurologist. This doctor will prescribe the necessary examinations and, if necessary, prescribe sedatives for children. 2 years is the age at which natural herbal preparations are most often recommended.

Sometimes the cause of children's tantrums lies in family troubles and lack of agreement between parents. Even if the parents never quarrel in front of the baby, the baby still feels the nervous atmosphere and reacts to it in his own way. As soon as they come to an agreement, calming their thoughts and feelings, the child’s tantrums immediately stop.

Being a child is just as difficult as being an adult. However, time is on our side. Very soon you will find that the two-year milestone has been passed, and all the tantrums are far behind.

Reading time: 4 minutes

The child's psyche has an increased sensitivity to external stimuli, which, in fact, causes a somewhat heightened reaction of minors to various provocative situations. With all this, the behavior of a naughty nervous child, showing irritability for no reason, requires an assessment by a psychologist. Find out what signs indicate that the crumbs have emotional problems.

Nervousness in children

The process of personality formation, as well as the higher mechanisms that ensure the implementation of behavioral reactions, is initiated from birth, but begins to develop more actively closer to three years. During this period, the baby still cannot clearly express their emotions, fears, needs. Against the background of misunderstanding on the part of adults and awareness of their own "I", a nervous child shows conscious volitional impulses.

If a baby of 2-3 years old becomes capricious for no apparent reason, you should consult a doctor to rule out serious mental disorders. Otherwise, the onset of symptoms of neurosis in children is considered a completely natural phenomenon, characterized by increased excitability and an exacerbated reaction to minor external stimuli.

Causes

Intellectual overload, coupled with irrational leisure and malnutrition, can become a trigger for the development of behavioral disorders in a child. The root causes of childhood nervousness affect the severity of its symptomatic picture. So, depending on the nature of the underlying disease (if any), which caused a psychological disorder, the latter may be supplemented by a tendency to depression; sleep disturbance and other negative conditions. At the same time, other reasons that the child is very nervous and excitable can be:

• previous infectious diseases;
• psychotrauma (separation from parents, the beginning of visiting children's groups);
• wrong model of education (authoritarian, model of permissiveness);
• mental illness;
• nervous tension;
• character traits.

signs

Constant stress, whims eventually develop into a neurosis or a transient mental disorder. In most cases, this condition develops by the age of 4-6, but sensitive parents may notice some signs of emotional disturbance even earlier. At the same time, close attention from adults requires the behavior of the crumbs during age-related changes in the psyche. As a rule, during this period, a nervous child experiences the following conditions especially intensively:

• sleep disorder;
• the appearance of anxiety, fears;
• development of enuresis, gastrointestinal disorders;
• speech disorders;
• nervous tics (coughing, blinking, clenching of teeth);
• unwillingness to communicate with peers.

What to do if the child is nervous

If attacks of aggression are caused by pathological conditions, for example, psychological illnesses, they must be dealt with together with correctional teachers and psychologists. In a situation where nervous breakdowns are caused by age-related changes or some kind of stressful situations, you need to be patient and try to find out what factors contribute to the onset of seizures.

In this situation, it is useful to reconsider educational methods. So, if you are one of the authoritarian parents, try to loosen control a little. It is extremely important to protect the vulnerable child's psyche in order to avoid further aggravation of the situation. To this end, it is necessary to create a favorable microclimate in the family, to avoid unreasonable prohibitions and punishments.

Successful overcoming of the manifestations of neurosis in an excitable baby depends, first of all, on the reaction of adults to the current situation. Psychologists advise patiently enduring manifestations of aggression. At the same time, directly during the attack, it is important to try to calm the baby and understand the reason for his discontent. If the child is nervous and aggressive, you should not frighten him or in any way belittle his dignity. In order to overcome the symptoms of increased excitability in children, psychologists recommend using the following methods:

1. Ask the child to draw on the landscape sheet the cause of the problem, and then offer to tear it up.
2. Switch the attention of the naughty crumbs to something else.
3. Engage your child in sports.

Education methods

In most cases, the treatment of nervous strain comes down to establishing and maintaining the correct daily routine. For obvious reasons, a change in the usual way of life may not please the baby, so any adjustments are best made in the form of leisure planning for the crumbs. An excited child requires special attention and patience, which is why neurologists recommend spending more time with such a baby. So, a good alternative to watching TV can be a walk in nature or a trip to the zoo. At the same time, do not forget about parental love and attention.

Hello dear readers. Today we will talk about solving the problem of increased excitability of children. It happens that the child's behavior changes gradually, the baby becomes more and more nervous, and it happens that a state of strong irritability arises spontaneously, when, in the opinion of the parents, nothing portends trouble. But, as you know, there is no smoke without fire. And in fact, such increased excitability in most cases is the body's response to some kind of stimulus, and, therefore, you can find the reason that causes such behavior. In this article we will talk about this, as well as how to behave in order to prevent such changes in the character of the baby and what to do if the child has already become irritable and nervous.

Causes of irritability

It is important to take into account the age of the child, when changes in character began, and strong irritability appeared. This is due to the fact that different age periods may have distinctive reasons that cause the baby to become very nervous.

1. period up to three years of age. The reason could be:

• prolonged labor activity, which was accompanied by asphyxia in the baby;
• adverse environmental conditions in which the mother was at the time of pregnancy;
• irritability can be a symptom of the development of endocrine diseases;
• the beginning of pathological processes of the organs of the nervous system;
• diseases of the cardiovascular system;
• long period of eruption of the first teeth;
• demanding from the child what he cannot do;
• a constant example of parents who show their irritability.

1. Children from four to six years old. The reasons for increased irritability are:

• total control;
• exaggerated demands.

Such an attitude towards a baby of this age period can lead to self-inflicted injury or bullying of those who are weaker.

1. Ages from seven years to adolescence. Typical reasons are:

• tense relationships with classmates or peers in the yard, a state of constant stress;
• disrespect for teachers, ridicule of the child;
• high expectations of parents who want to see an excellent student in their child.

1. Adolescence is characterized by such causes of irritable behavior:

• hormonal changes in the body;
• problems in relationships with peers, especially with girls;
• self-doubt.

You can also identify the main causes, regardless of age periods. If a child is constantly irritable from early childhood, then perhaps there is a genetic predisposition. In other cases, the most common causes are:

1. Lack of attention. The child, by his behavior, wants to do everything so that he is finally noticed. This happens when parents are busy with their own affairs and practically do not spend time with the baby.
2. The desire of the child to be independent and independent. It already manifests itself, and if at home there is a strong control of every movement and action of the baby, the situation is aggravated.
3. When every parent tries to raise a child in their own way.
4. If a child is praised, everyone runs around him. And then something changes, he goes to a team where there are a lot of the same kids, or he has a younger brother, sister. And all the attention goes to him. That's when the irritability starts.
5. Constant quarrels in the family, in which the baby willy-nilly be drawn. They put a serious strain on the psyche of the child and on his nervous state.

Fortunately, my son grew up as a normal child, with no change in behavior. But in my childhood there was a neighbor boy who was annoyed by everything around. He was then ten years old. At first, the parents pretended that nothing terrible was happening. His mother said that, apparently, a transitional age began ahead of time, so he behaves like that. But then all the neighbors began to tell her that this was not normal and, if she was unable to cope on her own, she should turn to a psychologist. As a result, the meeting with the specialist took place.

It turned out that the physical education teacher regularly shamed the boy in front of the whole class. The fact is that Petya was thin and weak, he could not climb a rope or hit the ball during volleyball, and in general, all classes were a failure. And instead of supporting the child, helping him get comfortable, strengthen the muscular system, the teacher laughed and shamed him in front of the whole class, inflicting a strong blow on the child's psyche.

It turned out that the boy even tried to skip classes, but the ill-fated teacher found him and took him to class. As soon as the reason that Petya became very nervous and irritable was identified, psychological rehabilitation was carried out - the boy became normal again. By the way, the teacher remained unpunished, the director did not believe the words of Petya's parents and said that she was an excellent teacher, they still need to be looked for. And the children were silent, apparently it was a shame, because they also mocked the boy.

Therefore, the parents had no choice but to transfer Petya to another school and send the boy to the sports section, where he was able to get stronger and even began to participate in sports competitions.

signs

1. A baby with excessive excitability will be in constant motion. It seems that he is interested in everything around, but this is only an appearance. He does not complete the work he has started, he literally lasts for five minutes, then he gives up one thing and takes on another, from which he also switches almost instantly.
2. When a child gets tired or when a change of scenery, the appearance of a stranger, can behave overexcited and even start screaming.
3. Such kids constantly say something, do not stop. Very often questions are asked, and for every trifle, but the child does not wait for answers, switches to another activity or asks a new question.
4. Perhaps the appearance of a nervous tic, insomnia, even an adult baby can suffer from enuresis.

It is important to recognize this condition in time and take action. Almost always, such a process is reversible, only in rare cases, some deviation, sometimes incurable, may be to blame.

The child became nervous, what to do

1. Change in daily routine. If it doesn't exist, then create it. It is very important that the day of the irritable baby is planned and includes all the necessary activities.
2. You should not follow the lead of a child who, with his tantrums or tears, is trying to get what he wants.
3. Praise your baby for moments of calmness and correct behavior. If you put any conditions on your child, stick to them. If they said that in five minutes, if the baby does not get up from the computer, then you turn it off, then do it. No need to first threaten the child, and then forget about your words. So the baby will not take the words of his parents seriously, will not reckon with you.
4. Do not categorically forbid doing this or that. You need to try to explain to the baby the reason for such a ban.
5. It is important that the baby has proportional mental and emotional stress.
6. If you are going somewhere with an irritable child, do not rush, do everything gradually. Haste for such children is not a good adviser.
7. Show your child by personal example how to cope with an incomprehensible situation, how to behave in society.
8. Don't ask your child to do something they can't do. You don't have to set the bar too high. Let the baby develop normally, everything has its time. Praise him even for small achievements and do not scold him for the smallest failures.
9. Try to identify the cause of the baby's irritability in time and start responding to it correctly. After all, if now everything is left to chance, if time is missed, such behavior can become habitual for a child, and he will grow up like that. In addition, it can have an irreparable effect on the delicate psyche of the baby, and, consequently, affect his general health.

Prevention

It is much easier not to take it to extremes, not to wait until the baby becomes a true rebel and there will be no limit to his irritability, but to take care of the correct behavior and upbringing of the child in a timely manner.

So measures aimed at preventing the development of increased irritability include:

1. Minimize total control. It is very important that the kid who wants to do independent things can achieve this. When you cut off oxygen to a child, do not let him do as he sees fit - you cause severe irritability.
2. Make friends with your own baby. It is very important to be a friend to your child. The kid needs to see that he is understood and supported.
3. Try to avoid quarrels and conflicts in the family. The child perceives everything very sensitively and begins to react sharply to manifestations of this type.
4. It is important to be able to compromise. It happens that dad defends his point of view, and mom - hers. Parents do not come to an agreement, and all this happens in front of the baby and the child becomes nervous and irritable.

Now you know what can cause increased irritability and extra nervousness even in the most calm baby. Take note of this and follow all measures to prevent this from happening to your child. You also now know what to do if the child is already too irritable. Stick to the recommendations and you'll be fine. Health to you and your children!