How to behave to survive a divorce. How can a woman survive a difficult divorce?

Divorce is always parting with a loved one or a once dear person. Some women emerge from this painful situation with mental and mental trauma, while others suffer from physical illnesses. This is a test of strength and endurance. Those who are thinking about how to survive a divorce from their husband are already halfway to the gates to a new life. It is very important to accept yourself and come to terms with the fact that a new streak has begun in life. You shouldn’t go back to the old, you need to get over it. You need to understand that the door is closed and will never open again. The separation must be completed. Don't be afraid to be alone and survive the tragedy with dignity.

Divorce is the collapse of plans for further life together, loss of hope for the future and loss of trust. And trust is what family relationships are based on. Often the reason for divorce is betrayal on the part of the husband, his betrayal, which is difficult to survive and forgive. Women who find themselves in such a traumatic situation face many questions that will have to be addressed in the future. If the divorce has not officially occurred, they are tormented by thoughts about how to maintain their marriage with their husband, how to protect their children from receiving psychological trauma, how to continue living alone, how to behave with men, and whether it is worth entering into a new relationship.

How the separation goes depends only on the woman. You can survive a divorce from your husband with fewer losses for yourself. Having passed a difficult test, you will become stronger and better: the struggle for a new life will strengthen your character. Perhaps in the future you will thank your husband for leaving you.

Psychological stages of divorce

How does a woman feel when she is divorced? It’s interesting that psychologists compare a woman’s feelings after a divorce with the feelings they experience when they lose a loved one or die. But everything can be survived.

First stage

At first, the psyche of women gives a defensive reaction. The brain is in a daze. This makes it easier for the body to adapt to changes and survive them. Others may mistake this state for indifference and indifference. But that's not true.

Behind the outward composure lies deep stress and the inability to fully understand what is happening and survive the process of divorcing her husband. This is the body's natural defense against mental pain. This is why many women delay divorce so much: by any means they try to avoid breaking up with their husband. Meanwhile, grievances, tears and mistrust accumulate and accumulate.

A woman’s denial of what is happening has the effect of pain relief. The purpose of this psychological moment is to realize the loss of an important person in your life. Much later an understanding of the situation comes. A woman comes face to face with real events that have already happened and cannot change anything. All that remains is to accept and experience them.

Second phase

Characterized by the manifestation of feelings such as resentment and anger. The woman will remember the events that led to the divorce, replay them in her memory and suffer. She will begin to look for answers to many questions, try to understand how this could happen. The resulting feelings of anger and resentment will be directly directed towards the ex-husband and those who are indirectly involved in this. For example, for a mistress, if there was one, for children, parents, girlfriends.

The woman will try with all her might to find the culprit for her troubles. It will seem to her that it will be easier to survive the breakup with her husband. But this will not lead to anything good. On the contrary, experiencing feelings of malice, dissatisfaction, and anger towards your close relatives, especially children, who are definitely not to blame for anything, can completely ruin your relationship with them. But in vain. Indeed, during this period, the support of relatives and friends is of great importance. Thanks to them, it will be easier for a woman to go through the process of divorcing her husband. The main thing is for her family to understand that her behavior is a protective reaction of the body. It is much easier to accumulate grievances, take offense and look for those to blame than to see your helplessness.

Third stage

The next stage is the test of guilt. A woman may convince herself that if her behavior had been different, then the divorce might not have happened. A woman will definitely find flaws in herself and will scold herself for the wrong attitude towards her husband. As a result, she will make herself completely to blame for the breakup. This is typical even in cases where the husband himself committed betrayal, abandoned his wife and left.

There is no point in these thoughts and torments. In this case, it will not be possible to survive the divorce any easier. You can't turn back time. It is necessary to move on and draw conclusions. At this stage, you can bring your condition to a deplorable state. Therefore, if the case becomes difficult, it is better to agree to the help of psychologists, listen to their advice and recommendations.

Fourth stage

This stage of divorce is no less difficult than the previous one. Stage – depression. Separating from your husband becomes so painful that the mental pain from the experience can develop into physical pain. This is the normal state of a woman who has failed in her family life. A natural reaction to the loss of a loved one, which anyone can experience. But depression that lasts for years requires the intervention of psychologists. At this moment, the state may be different:

some may cry constantly;
others will act calm outwardly, but internally experience the separation deeply.

During this period, the woman will try in every possible way to maintain the connection between herself and her ex-husband. Perhaps she will prove her love for him. With this behavior, she delays the start of a new life, does not give herself the opportunity to recover and survive the separation from her husband.

Therefore, if you are at this stage of divorce and express your emotions as described above, then this is considered absolutely normal. You must always remember that if depression is prolonged, then you may not know how to become happy after a divorce for a long time. How to live and enjoy further? How to survive a divorce, despite the fact that your husband left you, committing betrayal?

Remember, when one door closes, another opens. The main thing is to survive and let go of the situation.

Fifth and final stage

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This is emotional acceptance of loss. The woman feels better. She is trying to start a new life, get over and forget the divorce. Seeks advantages in separating from her husband. Being alone isn't that scary. Her main goal is to recover from past negative emotions. The woman gained valuable experience as a guide to action in the future.

Pregnancy and divorce

Going through a divorce from your husband is not easy, but going through it while pregnant is a hundred times more difficult. The woman will have to pull herself together and find ways to survive. The first thing you need to do is stop yourself from thinking about abortion. Human life is priceless. She cannot become the subject of revenge on her husband.

The child is not to blame for what happened. Moreover, an abortion will not guarantee that it will become easier to survive the breakup. Rather, on the contrary, it will directly lead to prolonged depression, and you will regret what you did for a long time. You can't have an abortion. This must be remembered.

A child will change a woman’s life after a divorce. He will give it new meaning. It will help you get over what happened. Therefore, it is very important that all your actions during pregnancy are aimed at maintaining the health of the baby. You must act in the best interests of the child. The divorce will pass, but you will not be left alone; the answer to the question of how to survive a divorce during pregnancy will be your child. See it as a precious gift.

But this is all theory, practice is important. What to do to get through this difficult moment:

accept help from loved ones and their advice. You definitely need to find someone who will listen and give practical advice on how to survive a divorce. It will be easier if someone hears you;
Don’t stay alone in the apartment, don’t isolate yourself. If you have a hobby, take it up. If you don't know how to sew, knit or crochet, this is a great time to learn how to do it. Devote your time to enjoyable and positive activities.
study all available information about childbirth, tips on caring for a newborn, read books about child psychology. This will distract you from unnecessary thoughts about divorce and your husband, and will simply be a useful pastime;
You shouldn’t always turn to the past and remember betrayal. The past is a passed stage. Tune in to the fact that only good things await you ahead. Thoughts are material.

Imagine how you will live with your baby, how you will spend your time. So he took the first step, said the first word “mother”. These moments are wonderful. They will definitely happen in your life. Tests are given so that we can survive them with dignity.

Quick marriage after divorce

Many women think that a new romance will save them from loneliness, they will feel better in a new relationship, this is the so-called ambulance after a divorce from their husband. Depression will go away. Time will be busy. There will be no need to stay alone in the apartment for a long time. Women hope that with a new man it will be easier to go through the process of divorcing their husband. But this approach is wrong. You shouldn’t make a new mistake when you haven’t yet been able to overcome and let go of the old one. A new relationship will not come to the rescue and will not help you easily forget your ex-husband.

Women strive to quickly enter into a new relationship when their spouse has abandoned them, gone to his mistress, or committed betrayal. They want to annoy their ex-husband more than to start building a family and go through a divorce. To start your life anew, you don't have to immediately attract a partner. We must wait until the depression goes away and the state of mind stabilizes.

If you plunge headlong into a new romance, you will constantly compare your partner with your ex-husband. There is no need to do this. And comparisons may not be in favor of a new relationship.

"Therapy" with alcohol

No one has yet been able to go through the process of divorcing her husband easily and painlessly - this is understandable. You are not the only one who has experienced similar feelings of loss and disappointment. Left alone in the apartment, you will not find help in alcohol. Alcohol will not make it easier, but will only make it worse to survive what is happening.

Alcohol will not be the answer to the question of how to forget your husband after a divorce and live happily. If the state of depression has not passed, then it will not help you behave with dignity, but will only worsen the situation.

Euphoria after taking a large dose of alcohol quickly passes. The next morning the same feelings as before will return. They will not return alone, but with a hangover. It will get worse. Psychological trauma will increase, and the help of psychologists will be needed. Jokes with alcohol are bad. You can drink yourself to death and become an alcoholic. No one is immune from this. Then you won’t be able to start a new life; you will have to be treated for alcoholism.

Start of a new life

An ex-spouse after a divorce is associated with the word betrayal. He left you. You have suffered the betrayal of a loved one. A psychologist provided assistance to you. You, of course, have psychological trauma - this is not a very happy reason to take steps and start building your life alone. But you can’t close yourself off from everyone in the apartment and continue to blame yourself for past mistakes.

Life does not stand still. She changes and you change with her. You can’t dwell on the past, otherwise you may not know how to become fully happy after a divorce from your husband.

You need to look for the positive sides in all the events that happen to you. Interesting hobbies and hobbies, watching movies, reading books will help you recover. Over time it will become easier and depression will go away. Everything will not be painless, but life goes on even after a divorce from your husband. Accept the help of loved ones, listen to their advice.

There is no point in sitting alone in an apartment for days on end and having to relive your husband’s infidelity again and again. Go out into the street to meet people, don’t isolate yourself, communicate and enjoy communication. And you will be able to survive the divorce!

You may want to get your other half back after listening to incompetent advice. And this is despite the insults caused to you, betrayal, betrayal, humiliation, and maybe even beatings. You think that when you love, you forgive everything easily, even cheating on your husband. Emotions speak to you, you don’t need to be led by them. Try to bide your time. Be patient for six months. You'll see, this desire will pass.

It is important not to sit idle: start renovating the apartment, rearranging it. Or maybe you will find yourself in charity, helping orphanages. Mercy will help you recover and survive your husband’s betrayal.

Women should take care of themselves during this time free from responsibilities. Improve your appearance or change it. You can lose weight, dye your hair color, change your image - this is a must-do. External changes will entail internal changes. Your transformation will be appreciated by those around you. And raising the level of self-esteem is a very important argument for surviving a breakup with dignity.

Don’t tell all your neighbors and acquaintances that you are overcome by depression, about your husband’s betrayal, how difficult it is for you, how he abandoned you. They will pity you and console you. You don't need pity. It won't make getting through a divorce any easier. You need support, help, advice that will direct the flow of your thoughts in the right direction.

It will be easy to survive your husband’s betrayal if you erase this person from your life once and for all. Remember: everything will come, but not immediately, time must pass, it is the best medicine in such cases.

Attention! Due to recent changes in legislation, the legal information in this article may be out of date! Our lawyer can advise you free of charge - write your question in the form below:

Divorce. On the scale of stress, this event in a person’s life ranks one of the first places. How to come to your senses and survive a divorce from your husband? What should you do if you have a child? The psychologist's advice on this matter is ambiguous. First of all, you need to normalize your own condition, otherwise you will not be able to help the baby.

Ways to survive a divorce from your husband if you have a child

There are certain methods that can help you during this difficult time.

STEP #1. Realize this isn't just happening to you.

The process of divorce is similar to experiencing the death of a loved one or discovering that you have a terminal illness.

A divorced woman goes through the same emotional stages:

you don't believe this is happening at all;
there is a desire to take revenge, to hurt him just as much;
Do you think that something else can be returned;
you begin to realize that nothing can change and become depressed;
you accept the divorce as a given and move on with your life.

If you experience something like this, you will soon feel better because many people have already been through this.

STEP #2. Take a break

Immediately after a divorce, the first months are the most difficult. You are under so much stress that there is an opportunity to do rash things that you will later regret. It is best to take a time out and refuse to make important decisions. Tell yourself: “I’ll think about it tomorrow!”

Step #3.Immerse yourself in negativity at intervals

You experience a lot of negative emotions. Dejection, aggression, despair, horror come over and over again, how can you survive a divorce from your husband in this case? Experts recommend not to suppress these feelings within yourself, especially if you have a child, otherwise they can “come out” as neuroses and illnesses. The psychologist's advice tends to be negative at intervals, let's consider this technique.

Only feel despair during certain periods, for example, while the children are at school. If suddenly resentment and hatred surge at another time, tell yourself: “Stop, I will have a minute for this tomorrow!” This technique will allow you to save energy, which is already scarce.

STEP #4. Live by the “Here and Now” rule

There is a technique called “here and now”, which also makes it easier. Live now. Do you wash dishes? Great, just concentrate on the dishes!

Consider the rainbow the soap suds form, feel how a cleanly washed plate creaks. There is no yesterday or tomorrow, there is only now. This technique makes it possible to escape from negative experiences at least for some time.

STEP #5. Don't refuse help

If there are those who will help you in this difficult time, do not refuse to help. Sometimes it even comes from people you definitely didn’t expect it from. No need for heroism.

Ask your mother or friend to babysit the child or pay the rent. Take time to lie around and stare at the ceiling without doing anything. Sometimes it helps.

STEP #6.Remember that health is most important

To withstand stress, the body must be in good working order. Try to be in the fresh air more often, take more walks, and do not abuse your body with alcohol and cigarettes.

As many women say, it is possible to survive a divorce from your husband, but everything happens gradually. The situation gets worse, if you have a child, walk outside together. Swimming is a great way to relieve stress and boost morale; sign up for the pool together. The advice for visiting a psychologist will be the same.

STEP #7.Treat yourself to some treats

If so many bad things have happened in your life, now is the time to treat yourself. Even if all your life you thought it was overkill. Try something that brings you joy: cinema, dancing, dating, new lipstick, a beautiful handbag.

Even the smallest little thing can lift your spirits. And now you really need endorphins. To hell with them, with a couple of extra pounds, you can visit the gym a little later. Maybe it’s worth changing the situation, taking a vacation and going on vacation? Think about it.

STEP #8. Think right

Even if you are sure that all this is complete nonsense, try reading esoteric literature, for example, books by L. Hay, L. Vilma, Sergei Lazarev, Osho.

If you let go of your partner without hatred and aggression, realizing that each of you now has your own path, it will become much easier. And then you need to try to imagine the future as you would like it to be.

Our thoughts are material, they create the future. Therefore, control yourself, try to think less about the bad, imagine an exclusively happy new life!

STEP #9. Think maybe it's for the better

It is terrible when a woman loses her material well-being or housing during a divorce. But as statistics show, girls can survive a divorce from their husband and at the same time achieve impressive success in material terms, especially if they have a child.

The generally accepted advice of a psychologist says: the need to provide for oneself and children can bring out a lot of strength and talents in a person. Often women are subsequently even grateful to their ex-husbands, because it was the separation that gave them the opportunity to achieve success in their careers or hobbies.

STEP #10. Don't turn your child against their father

It is difficult to say whether it is good to save a practically broken marriage just for the sake of children. After all, they hear constant swearing and scandals, feel the mutual hostility and irritation of their parents, and get used to hypocrisy and deception.

A child may have a similar family scenario, and he doesn’t know any other way. And this will affect his own adult life and relationships with the opposite sex.

No matter how much you would like to forbid this bastard from seeing your children, do not turn your child against his father. He is considered the father of the child, it is important that there remains a good relationship between them.

Again, after breaking up, you shouldn’t focus your entire life only on children. How many cases are there when a mother, who once gave up her personal life for the sake of her children, was then left completely alone.

“You and I don’t need anyone, the two of us are fine.” This position is dangerous because he will either grow up to be an egoist, accustomed to constant praise, or he will remain a mother’s boy for the rest of his life and will not be able to have his own family, torn between his wife and mother.

How to help a child if parents are getting divorced

Step-by-step instructions and basic advice from a psychologist on how to survive a divorce from your husband have been revealed. But if there is a child, it is also necessary to help him.

1. When parents divorce, children experience it very painfully. It seems to them that their parents’ separation is their fault, or that they are not worthy of love at all.

2. Depending on their age, children may suddenly experience changes in behavior: aggression, tearfulness, moodiness, nightmares, deterioration of memory and school performance.

3. If a child is torn between his parents, tries to please his mother and suffers because his father leaves, he has a serious psychological conflict. Health or behavioral problems may also appear.

4. All the anger that you direct at your ex-husband will also fall on your baby, even if you don’t want it at all. The child is half dad and half mom. If he hears how bad one of the parents is, he will take it personally.

5. Children often perceive the separation of mom and dad as their personal fault (he ate poorly, didn’t listen). Don’t hush up this topic and don’t pretend that nothing happened, kids see and feel it.

6. The safety of a child is connected only with the world of adults. Dad and mom are brave, strong and smart. If the mother is depressed, does not notice the child, cries all the time, and the father screams and swears, then for the baby this is a complete collapse of his world and a total catastrophe.

7. If everything is so bad, it will never get better, since the marriage has broken up. Look for ways to survive the divorce, talk to your husband. After all, if you have a child, you need to think about him. This is exactly what all the advice of a family psychologist leans towards.

8. Very often children have a fear that the parent who does not live in the family will never be their dad again. All the children have dads, but he doesn’t have a father.

9. If you are still single, it is important to agree with your ex-spouse so that he comes to the child and spends time with him. If you are already in a new relationship, then the baby can be proud that everyone has only one dad, and he has two.

10. Another fear of a child is the fear that the second parent may also leave, then he will be left completely alone in the world. Hug your child more often and tell him that you both love him, despite the fact that dad now lives separately.

Important!

Even if you hate your ex, don’t make your child a free psychotherapist and don’t dump all your emotions towards your spouse on him. Try to hold back. It is difficult for a child to joyfully communicate with dad on Sundays if he thinks that in this way he is betraying his mother.

Here's what you should talk about with your child:

It’s not your fault that your parents separated;
you have the right not to tell mom what dad said, and vice versa;
you have the right to ask questions and want explanations;
if your parents divorced, it’s not a bit shameful;
your parents still love you, even if they are separated.

If you perceive divorce as a change in the family situation, and not a catastrophe, then it will be much easier for the baby to survive this stage.

There is no single step-by-step instruction on exactly how to survive a divorce. You need to talk to your husband and decide together if there is a child. Divorce is a traumatic experience for children. But the advice of a psychologist says that more than half of children in broken families cope quickly with their parents’ separation. A lot depends on how the parents react to the separation.

When people get married, they hope for a happy family life. They plan to live a long and happy life together. Few people can imagine that they will face a painful divorce and a broken heart. At the beginning of family life, almost no one thinks about this. However, the harsh reality leads to the fact that most couples get divorced within a few years of marriage.

Parting with a loved one is a very difficult process. It leaves painful scars on the heart, brings pain, sadness and a feeling of emptiness. Negative emotions overcome a person and deprive him of the ability to perceive the world around him. Life seems meaningless, self-esteem decreases and depression begins. This condition can lead to fatal consequences. You need to look for a way out of this situation and try to improve your life.

How to get rid of stress?

Not every person can survive such a difficult experience as divorce. The current situation seems hopeless. It’s hard to imagine, but you have to reassemble the broken pieces and try to start all over again. What to do in such a situation? How to rid yourself of constant worries and protect yourself from stress?

First of all, it’s worth remembering that parting with your significant other freed you from negative emotions. This part of your life is over. Losing a loved one always leads to inevitable stressful experiences. But try to think, were you really that happy?

Perhaps divorce is your only chance to find long-awaited happiness. There may be different reasons for a breakup, but they all inevitably lead to stress. It is important to remember that you will not be able to turn back time. Try to let go of the past, you will feel long-awaited relief. But don’t think that your experiences will end there.

Tears, hysterics and depression are the eternal companions of partings. Just think, you have parted with a very important and significant part of your life. It's not easy to go through this. Don't keep everything to yourself. Give free rein to your emotions and allow yourself to “suffer” for a few days.

It is almost impossible to get rid of worries. You will be immersed in painful memories, remember happy moments, perhaps every thing reminds you of your failed soulmate. Resentment and feelings of worthlessness will cause you great pain.

Unfortunately, it is impossible to get rid of this. You can start all over again, change your hairstyle, change your place of residence, but your psychological state will remain very precarious for a long time. You won't be able to go to sleep with pain and wake up the next morning as a completely different person. The pain will go away gradually. Remember, the time will come when you will forget about your pain. You will feel better. The main thing is not to drown in your grief, but to find ways to deal with it.

Try to think

What is causing you such pain? Did you love this person? Or maybe humiliated self-esteem speaks to you? The only way to reduce pain is to understand the cause of your worries. If you can answer this question honestly and openly, you will immediately feel the long-awaited relief.

Don't think about your pain. Try to see and get rid of the obsessive feeling forever. Try to write about your pain on a piece of paper. Psychologists believe that this method helps to cope with unpleasant thoughts. So, take a piece of paper and try to think about what is the reason for your suffering. If it’s hard for you to single out one reason, you can write several. In world practice, the following are the most common reasons:

I still have feelings for her/him – If you still love your ex, then letting go of your feelings won’t be easy. But by admitting this to yourself, you will be able to better deal with such a scourge.
I am afraid of loneliness - this is the most common and widespread fear of a person. Often tears, fear of being alone is the cause of stress and tears. In reality, the person does not suffer for the former partner, but is afraid that he will never be able to start a new relationship and will remain alone.
I don’t want to give him/her away to anyone - the feeling of ownership also doesn’t allow me to calmly let go of my ex-partner. A person feels humiliated, jealousy and humiliated self-esteem speaks in him. He wants to return his partner not because of great feelings, but only to satisfy the feeling of ownership.
I am afraid for my children - women are more often subject to such fear. Being unhappy in their marriage, they continue to live and endure insults only to ensure a happy future for their children. It is important to understand that children will not benefit from a tense environment in the home. This will only ruin their psyche and leave them traumatized for the rest of their lives.
I don’t know what to do next - of course, a person is overcome by fear. He or she does not know how to build a future life. There is no need to panic in this situation. Fear of the unknown often prevents people from moving on. It is important to get rid of it and believe in your own strength.
I can’t forget his/her betrayal - of course, it’s hard to come to terms with the betrayal of your significant other. If the relationship ended not at your request, but at the initiative of an unfaithful partner, coping with this grief will not be easy. You should be glad that you are done with this deception forever and try to start over.

The main thing is to be honest with yourself. Don't tell the truth, talk about your true experiences. Don’t be shy to admit to yourself your fear of loneliness or reluctance to change your life. By painting the true picture for yourself, you will find a way to cope with the situation and start over.

By making a list of your experiences, you can sensibly assess the situation. Remember, it will only be difficult for you the first time. The long-awaited relief will not take long to arrive, especially if you are honest with yourself.

First stage

Going through a separation from your spouse is very difficult. It becomes especially difficult in the first weeks after a breakup. The problem lies not only in worries, but in financial issues. It is necessary to decide on the housing issue, which is also a very difficult task. Psychologists strongly recommend moving away and not living in different rooms like neighbors. This will only add negative experiences and cause constant stress.

It’s much harder for women, because in most cases they are left with the children and are forced to deal with financial issues on their own. It is worth limiting your relationship with your ex-spouse and turning to your family for help. It is important to remember that it is necessary to avoid quarrels and conflicts with your ex-spouse. This will only make your situation worse.

Get rid of the source of pain

Try to get rid of things that remind you of your ex. Even if they are very dear to your heart and many happy memories are associated with them. This includes all gifts, things, photos together and other items. It is recommended to collect them in a remote place in order to forever rid yourself of unpleasant memories.

You don't have to throw things away. It’s enough to just collect them in a box and hide them somewhere you’ll never look. One day you will realize that you no longer feel the same awe for them. At the same time, your pain will disappear. Life will no longer seem meaningless.

Protect yourself from bad thoughts

Try to relax. Bad thoughts will not bring you anything good. It is necessary to start everything from scratch. Try to completely change your life. Go for walks, meet friends, make new acquaintances. Do what you've been wanting to do for a long time.

Find a hobby, it should be something that really interests you. Try to keep yourself busy with something interesting. You can spend time alone with yourself, watching an interesting movie, or go visit relatives. Try to think only about good things. It's time to put an end to the negativity for good.

Make contact with children

Divorce proceedings are bad for children. Remember, their future fate depends on your actions. The separation of parents can seriously affect the psyche of children. Under no circumstances should you transfer your hatred towards your ex-spouse onto your children. This is the most common and fatal mistake most parents make. Don't discuss your problems, don't tell your child bad things about bad parents, and don't involve him in matters of the heart.

Try to explain the current situation to your child. Tell him that mom and dad no longer live, but this does not change your attitude towards him. Surround your child with love and care, do not leave him alone. Parents' relationships should not affect their child's life.

Outside opinion

Remember, divorce will inevitably lead to questions. People around you will feel sorry for you, ask leading questions and interfere in things that are not their business. Work colleagues, friends and family will try to give you their advice, not always realizing that you don't need it. In this case, the main thing is to react calmly and not show aggression. Otherwise, there will be more and more questions, and those around you will decide that you are suffering. You should not pour out your soul to a stranger and tell him about mental illnesses.

The best option would be to come up with several ready-made answers. Answer clearly and calmly, do not let strangers in on your problems. Keep your sentences short and make it clear that you do not intend to discuss the topic. People around you will quickly understand that they will not get anything interesting from you.

As for relatives, you can be a little more frank here. Again, you are not obligated to let others in on your problems. But your loved ones are most likely very worried about you and want to help. Tell them the true reason for the breakup and ask them not to return to this topic again.

Change your style

Women and men are recommended to radically change their style. A new look will be the beginning of a new life. Women can change their hair color or hairstyle, radically change their wardrobe and sign up for some courses. After a divorce, you will have a lot of free time. You can devote it to yourself and protect yourself from bad thoughts. By changing your appearance, you can change your perception of the world.

The main thing to remember is that you can change your style and place of residence, but you will never be able to start a new life if you do not let go of your ex-partner. This is sometimes very difficult to do. You are overcome by grievances and the desire to express everything that has accumulated inside. If the ex-partner does not suffer, but builds his life, it becomes even harder.

How to deal with such a problem? Psychologists advise remembering that your life did not end with a divorce. You have a chance to rethink everything and achieve better. Use divorce as a chance to change things. Most likely, you will become even happier than you were in your marriage.

Try not to get angry - your ex-partner did you a lot of harm. You gave him your youth, tried to strengthen the relationship and received black ingratitude in return. It's not easy to forgive something like this. Resentment and the desire for revenge do not allow one to live in peace. But it is important to remember that being in constant negativity will not make you happy. Stop being angry with your ex-partner, and before you know it, you will forget about your pain. It will be replaced by positive moments, completely displacing the negative.
Don’t feel guilty – there’s no point in it anymore. Try to think that this will be better for both of you. Leave what happened in the past. You may have made many mistakes that led to this result. However, this is not a reason to suffer from remorse.
Forgive betrayal - the hardest thing to forgive is betrayal. A person cannot forget such a betrayal and feels humiliated. Surviving betrayal is not easy, but once you start taking care of your own life, you will gradually cope with unpleasant thoughts. The pain will completely disappear after you develop new interests and relationships.

The main thing is not to dwell on bad thoughts. This is the only way you can survive the painful period.

Divorce is always difficult and painful. After all, you were going to spend the rest of your life with this person, making plans together, raising children. And now all hopes have collapsed, and an important stage is left behind.

And what lies ahead is still unknown and incomprehensible. Plus stress and deep emotional shock, even if you are the initiator of the separation. And it’s still hard to believe that life goes on after a divorce, and that it can also be happy. But it's true.

Survive the loss

Divorce for any reason is extremely stressful. On the stress scale used by professional psychologists, it ranks second. And there are often cases when, after a divorce, a person finds himself in the deepest depression, from which he can only get out with the help of a psychotherapist.

They will tell you how to survive a divorce from your husband, advice from a psychologist who believes that you should treat this event like any other significant loss in your life - it must be accepted correctly. And, no matter how strange it may sound, we all experience serious losses according to the same algorithm, which psychologists have long calculated.

Before returning to a full life, everyone goes through five main stages:

Negation. For some time the brain simply refuses to understand that everything has already happened and nothing can be corrected. That the marital relationship is completely over and it will not be possible to improve it. That you need to start a new life and let go of the past.
Anger. It often arises during a divorce, especially if you are not the initiator. And next to it is definitely a feeling of guilt for the fact that you could not maintain the relationship. And also the envy that appears when you see happy families.
False hope. This is the most dangerous stage, when it seems possible to return everything back. Divorce looks like a terrible mistake, because there were so many good things in your life together!
Depression. A very dangerous state when you give up and don’t want anything - neither old nor new relationships. It is at this stage that problems with insomnia, overeating, alcohol, etc. usually begin.
Adoption. And only here does recovery begin, and there is a real chance to start a new life from scratch. When you have completely come to terms with what has already happened, your body and soul are gradually restored, and the desire to change something and try new things comes.

But there is a problem - many get stuck at one of the stages and do not move on. But understanding what is happening to you speeds up the process of stress and brings the moment of acceptance closer. If you realize that you have been in the stages of false hope or depression for a long time and cannot get out of them on your own, be sure to consult a psychotherapist.

For many men, the problem of how to survive a divorce from their wife is further aggravated by the fact that they are not ready to solve everyday issues that their spouse used to deal with. And the fact that children more often stay with their mother, which means that the father’s participation in their lives becomes less significant.

Different situations

Divorce situations are different. Since two parties take part in the process, there are several options for the development of events. Spouses can file for divorce by mutual consent - this is the fastest and most painless way. If only one party initiates the separation, and the other does not agree with it, then the matter takes a serious turn, and the process may drag on.

By mutual agreement

Divorce by mutual consent, provided that there are no small common children in the family, occurs quickly and without any problems, upon a joint application. But only a court can divorce a family with minor children, even if the second spouse is not against it.

In this case, it is better to calmly agree on everything at once:

who will the children stay with?
how often they will see their ex-spouse;
how much he is willing to give monthly for their maintenance;
are children allowed to travel abroad and under what conditions;
how joint housing and property will be divided.

Otherwise, in addition to the divorce, the court will also deal with the division of property and the case of collecting alimony. And this means extra nerves, time and money too. Staying with your ex in normal human relations is the most correct tactic.

On your own initiative

When the initiator of the divorce survives, it is easier to survive. Especially if the ex is an alcoholic, a domestic tyrant, or the reason for the breakup was betrayal. As a rule, it takes some time to make such a decision, and during this period you have time to come to terms with what is happening.

But if the other party was categorically against the official divorce, and the matter was resolved in court with mutual accusations and scandals, then severe stress cannot be avoided.

In this case, after a divorce, it is better to take a time out:

go on vacation, change the environment;
send the children to their grandmother so as not to take out their irritation on them;
rearrange furniture to update the apartment;
change your image to feel like a different person.

Most often, 1-2 weeks is enough to survive the loss and gain strength for physical and spiritual rebirth.

When your spouse leaves

How to survive a divorce from your husband if you still love him, but he left for someone else? This seems like a real tragedy that is simply impossible to cope with! But everything passes, and this too will pass, says the ancient wisdom. The main thing is not to aggravate the problem by trying to return an irretrievably lost relationship.

In this case, it is advisable to at least temporarily stop all contact with your ex-spouse. Everything becomes more complicated if there is a common child. It is very undesirable to limit his relationship with his father immediately after the divorce, so as not to cause additional trauma. But their meetings can be arranged in such a way that there is minimal overlap with the ex.

Under the same roof

Of course, the ideal option is when, immediately after the decision to make a complete break is made, the spouses begin to live separately. They do not meet every day, they are less tempted to start a showdown again. Moreover, everything is already extremely clear - there is no marital relationship. Whether it’s worth remaining friends, just acquaintances, or not crossing paths at all anymore is up to you to decide.

But, alas, not everything is so simple. Many families do not have the opportunity to leave immediately, and very often a woman is forced to live together with her ex-husband after a divorce for several more months, or even years, until he or she resolves the housing issue. At first it is incredibly difficult mentally. But psychologists say that if you build relationships correctly, it is quite possible to create fairly comfortable conditions for both.

Here are some useful tips that can help in this difficult situation:

Agree that the concept of “we” no longer exists, and now you are not a family, but two well-known people living under the same roof.
Establish hostel rules and duty schedule: from now on, household duties such as cleaning common areas, taking out trash, etc. will have to be done one by one.
Limit your personal space. At a minimum, you should not enter each other’s room unexpectedly and without invitation.
Divide the budget and decide what amount will be allocated monthly for children.
Follow the rules of the hostel: do not make noise late, do not invite guests without the consent of the other party.
Don't forget that each of you now has the right to privacy. But it’s better not to let it happen in front of your ex-husband.

Everything becomes very complicated if there are children in the family. When a divorced mother and father still live under the same roof, it is not easy for them to realize that the marriage has truly broken down and the family as such no longer exists.

Maintaining a warm, human relationship with your ex-spouse will give your children a sense of security and an understanding that they still have both loving parents.

How to live on

Everyone reacts to divorce differently. Some people cope with the shock quickly enough. Others may survive for several months, or even years. But sooner or later the understanding comes that this stage of life is already completed and it’s time to start a new one.

The following advice from psychologists will help you recover faster:

Don't close yourself down. It sounds cliché, but you are not the first and you will not be the last to go through a divorce. There is nothing to be ashamed of, it does not mean your inferiority or inability to build relationships. So stop hiding, go out into the world and start communicating. Of course, you shouldn’t tell the first person you meet about your problems. But when answering the question about your marital status, don’t be complex. You are divorced. All. Dot. But life goes on.
Chat with friends. It is in such difficult life situations that true comrades emerge. And not real either. Be prepared for this - not all of your mutual friends will accept your position. Even if the other side is wrong. She's just closer to them. There's nothing wrong with that either. Forgive and let go of those who are no longer with you. And thank those who stayed. And at the same time, think about it: maybe it’s worth expanding your circle of acquaintances and making new friends?
Change your image. Separating from your ex-spouse is never painless. A negative internal state is immediately reflected in the appearance. Fortunately, the inverse relationship also works. Once you change your image for the better, your eyes begin to shine, your shoulders straighten, and self-confidence and sexuality appear out of nowhere. Don't believe me? Then go to a good salon and check it out!
Find a hobby. Many people try to find an outlet after a divorce in work and caring for children. But, plunging even deeper into the routine, you are unlikely to extract from it the positive emotions that are absolutely necessary now. Another thing is a new hobby. Especially if it's something you've always wanted to try but never got around to due to lack of time, money or other reason. Now is the time!
Be careful with alcohol. The fact that alcohol (and even more so drugs) help relieve tension and overcome stress is nothing more than a myth. Yes, it dulls the pain and creates the illusion of emotional uplift, but the problems themselves do not go away. And they will still have to be solved - tomorrow or in a week. Only in the morning will they be joined by a headache, symptoms of general intoxication and a feeling of guilt. Is it worth complicating the situation further?
Live the emotions. Doctors say that suppressed emotions cause the development of such serious diseases as hypertension, cancer, stroke, heart attack, not to mention psychosomatics. Therefore, you want to scream - scream, you want to cry - cry, you want to tell your ex everything that you think about him - go ahead. But alone. Or next to a reliable friend (girlfriend). And then exhale, take a shower and start your life again.
Control your appetite. A large percentage of overweight women gained it after a divorce. Sweets and delicious food really help overcome stress, as they provoke the release of pleasure hormones, endorphins. But it’s one thing to treat yourself to something delicious a couple of times a week, and another thing to eat stress every night (while suffering on the couch). By the way, pleasure hormones are produced during jogging. So, maybe it's worth getting them from another source?
New relationships. This is absolutely not a case of “knocking out a wedge with a wedge.” Even if your ex-spouse has left for someone else, you shouldn’t start a new relationship out of spite. Until you have fully recovered from the old ones, you will project your claims onto all new partners and in the end you will only receive another portion of disappointments. You need to start a new relationship with a clean slate. And not before you get rid of accumulated claims and existing stereotypes.

Meditation and breathing techniques, which you can learn in yoga classes, are great for getting rid of negative emotions. If you can’t cope with them on your own, you should seek help from a psychologist or a support group where people with the same problems as you meet. As a last resort, share your experiences on the forum and find out how others overcome the same problems.

Of course, divorce is difficult. But you can cope with it. And the sooner you begin conscious actions to restore your own mental balance and correct your lifestyle, the better. Parting is always followed by new meetings. Life goes on, and how ready you are to turn over the old page depends only on you.

The family goes through a number of stages and crises in its development. Sometimes a crisis ends in divorce. According to statistics, divorces most often occur 2-3 years after marriage and at the age of 40-45 years. However, the peak of divorce occurs at 25-29 years of age, with men at 29 years and women at 28 years. If we consider the age of couples, divorces occur more often in young families (up to 4 years of marriage), in families aged 4-5 years and 10-14 years. In 70% of cases, divorce is initiated by wives. One way or another, you apparently ended up in the divorce statistics. Then I propose to move from words to actions, or rather, drawing up a rehabilitation plan after a divorce.

There can be many reasons for divorce. Sometimes you are amazed at the absurdity of the reason (from someone’s bell tower). But for spouses, the reason is always subjectively significant. The most popular and common reasons include:

treason and (including unfounded);
differences in interests, hobbies and views;
based on living conditions;
personality problems and immaturity;
elimination of the primary basis for marriage (bankruptcy, loss of health).

Each individual is also influenced by broader factors. For example, the social and economic situation in the country. Broader reasons also include:

acceptability of divorce in society (absence of negative stereotypes);
emancipation of women, economic independence (some members of the fair sex now earn more than men);
urbanization, modernization, change in rhythm and lifestyle;
changing the values and attitudes of society, moving away from stereotypes and prejudices;
changes in psychophysiological characteristics in developmental psychology and family psychology;
early and reckless marriages.

Risk factors

Normative family crises, accompanied by tension and anxiety in relationships, are always a negative factor that can provoke divorce. But others can be highlighted:

divorce or conflict in the relationship between the spouses’ parents;
living together with the spouse's parents;
separation of spouses or frequent business trips;
early or late age of marriage (in the first case, the spouses are not yet fully formed as individuals and will change, in the second - they are already difficult to change and are fully formed as individuals);
idealization of the partner (“rose-colored glasses break with glass inward”);
one of the partners;
contradictions in temperaments (“they didn’t get along”);
unequal social, material, intellectual or other level of partners;
one of the spouses being too busy with their career;
sexual dissatisfaction, infidelity;
systematic mistrust and jealousy;
infertility or other illnesses of one of the spouses;
marriage due to pregnancy, by convenience;
the birth of a child at the beginning of a family relationship;
antisocial behavior of one of the partners.

Additional negative factors include:

material problems (loans, budget planning, income and expenses of each spouse);
moral and physical stress in the family and at work;
“monsters” of spouses (personal, jealousy);
external forces (media, entertainment, friends (with whom you don’t even need enemies), envious people);
lack of personal time;
struggle for leadership.

Each of these factors can be combated if you know about it and notice its influence in time. But since we are talking about a divorce, this is no longer important. But! This is important to know in order to take into account when entering into a new relationship. And please don’t say “never again.” When you meet your soul mate and a worthy candidate, you will understand that this is simply necessary.

Stages of divorce

American psychologist Elizabeth Kübler-Ross identified 5 stages of accepting divorce:

Negation. A person tries to justify the energy expended on a relationship with phrases like “this is liberation.”
Anger. At this stage, everything that has boiled over is poured onto the partner. It is often at this stage that children become involved. Mutual manipulation and insults also occur.
Negotiation. Attempts to establish or renew relationships. At this stage, manipulations and tricks are also possible.
Depression. Occurs when previous reactions have not brought the desired result. This is an awareness of the irreparable situation. Self-esteem decreases. The person begins to avoid people and avoid new relationships.
Adaptation. Adaptation to a new situation, helping yourself and your children adapt.

This is not the only classification of the stages of divorce. For example, based on the works of S. Duck and J. A. Lee, I identified another 5 stages:

Awareness of dissatisfaction with the marriage with further “chewing” and silence or expression of dissatisfaction to the partner.
Negotiation. This is the stage of mutual expression of claims and experiments. The most common example is the variety of sexual life (role-playing games, adult stores). But, of course, this is the most primitive thing. We can talk about more sublime things: visiting a museum, trying to find a common activity for leisure. As a result of negotiations, the relationship either stabilizes, or the spouses recognize the fact of discord.
An official decision on divorce, an introduction to relatives and friends.
Individual reflection. The spouses are already living the experience separately, analyzing the situation and their feelings. There are two possible scenarios for the development of events: positive acceptance (this is a lesson, experience) or non-acceptance (this is a failure), accompanied by hysterics and depression.

I think we can say that the second classification better describes the process of divorce for a couple, and the first - the subjective experiences of its members. What I want to ask is: what stage are you at now (denial, anger, negotiations, depression, adaptation)? And have you gone through the previous one? It is important. In order to irrevocably work through the situation of divorce, you need to consciously go through each stage.

Why divorce is dangerous

I don’t want to talk about how divorces affect the demographics of the country. I think for someone looking for an opportunity to cope with a divorce, this is of little interest. And I also don’t want to intimidate people with spoiled demographics, calling not to spoil the statistics.

I propose to consider the most common personal conditions of women after divorce (we need to know what to deal with):

yearning,
despair,
fear,
uncertainty,
disappointment,
frustration,
devastation,
apathy,
low performance;
deterioration of health,
reorganization of life.

Sometimes divorce affects self-image so much that self-esteem drops. Often there is a fear of new relationships and repeated failure. The burden of divorce can poison a woman’s life for many years.

Divorce: end or beginning?

Even in science there is no unambiguous evaluative opinion about whether divorce is bad or useful. What can we say about understanding this phenomenon at the everyday level? Again, discarding all the world’s problems, all that remains is to talk about the subjectivity of the perception of divorce.

It is important to determine, dear reader, what divorce ultimately means for you. Who was the initiator and why? What do you have now? Try to describe the following points in relation to you from the perspective of how it was in the family, and how it might look now.

Economic interests and opportunities.
Professional interests and opportunities.
Socio-economic status.
Interests and hobbies.
Self-development (self-education, external self-improvement).

And the key question is: has marriage suppressed you as a person? Maybe there is nothing to regret? Yes, this is change, undoubtedly something new and unknown. But maybe now you can fully open up: start playing sports, going to a hobby club, climbing the career ladder, cooking, reading and watching what you want? Are you sure that divorce has not opened the door for you to a world of self-sufficiency and maximum fulfillment?

I dare to suggest that if a marriage broke up, it means there was something destructive and limiting to its participants. The question is what exactly and for whom.

Among the advantages of divorce for a woman are the opportunity to improve life and psychological health, maintain personal dignity, and enter into new, enjoyable relationships.

I recommend looking at the situation not as closed doors, but as open ones. If it is difficult to formulate verbally, then create written columns “what was”, “what could be”. Relationships are usually based on self-sacrifice and compromise. So I think you can find a couple of motivational sips to view divorce as something positive.

How to come to your senses

You can successfully go through a divorce by following a simple plan. The points described below are approximate guidelines, a framework for working to overcome divorce. To draw up detailed instructions, you need to know all the nuances of divorce and former family relationships.

Start working through your divorce by identifying what exactly is bothering you. What feelings are you experiencing? What stage are you at according to your own perception? What are you afraid of? When you systematize your internal chaos, you will notice positive changes: your sleep will improve, and approximate work guidelines will be outlined. You will not see a huge question mark weighing you down, but you will see many small, solvable problems somewhere under your feet.
Next, identify your potential, your strengths, advantages, advantages, knowledge and skills. That is, find resources and tools to solve these small problems. Evaluate and look for external resources (useful contacts, support from loved ones, etc.).
Constantly analyze your steps. Watch and be proud of how you move from despair to independence and freedom.
Consider how wealthy you are in your own eyes. How fulfilled are you in different areas? It suits you? If yes, then why do you offend yourself with uncertainty and suspiciousness? If not, then you need to draw up a step-by-step (small tasks) plan for self-realization. It can include anything: get a higher education, take retraining courses, start playing sports, take teaching courses, change your appearance, master public speaking. Do everything to please yourself first of all!
Similar to the third stage, track the process of transformation and self-realization.
The final chord will be working to restore trust, faith in love and relationships. Probably at this stage you will be able to ask yourself not why you are doing this, but why. What did you learn from this situation?

Method "Confession"

You can forgive and say goodbye to your spouse forever using the “Confession” method. Write down the story of your family life on a piece of paper. Pros and cons in two columns. Read both lists out loud, analyze and summarize. Thank your spouse for all the good things (you can put a chair opposite and imagine that your ex-husband is sitting there, or print out his photo). And then forgive for all the bad things. Next, in front of the mirror, forgive yourself for all your mistakes (“Svetlana, I forgive you for not recognizing the liar in this man”). This will be the point in overcoming divorce. No matter how hard it may be, say these words out loud. Believe me, your brain, having said: “Yeah, she finally forgave and let go,” will immediately begin sending signals in accordance with this setting. You can do whatever you want with lists, for example, burn the negative ones and keep the positive list.

Let me make a reservation that rehabilitation after a divorce can take a long time. If you decide to really survive this situation productively, then you need to be patient and strong. Of course, you can drown out any emotions with hard work, partying, or delving into something else. But sooner or later you will be left alone with yourself. And then what? The points described above are aimed at ensuring that you learn to live in a new way, and not try to constantly run away from yourself and the traumatic situation of divorce.

The goal of your adaptation is to achieve complete independence from your husband and his family. This also means an emotional connection. I understand how much space your spouse occupied in your life. In fact, all life is closely intertwined with his life. Which is why we can assume how difficult it is for you now without a part of yourself, but you need to gain strength to regenerate the lost elements.

Learn to control your emotions. Sign up for yoga, learn breathing exercises. Learn to think first and speak later. Say mantras (phrases for self-hypnosis), count, leave the room for a while (to calm down). Learn to switch your attention. Basically, do whatever you want, but don't get emotional.
Play sports. The benefits of systematic training for the mind and body have long been proven.
Take care of yourself.
Allow yourself to do what you couldn’t do before (there wasn’t enough time, your husband was against it).
Show healthy selfishness, but do not forget about the interests of other participants, especially children. Give preference to constructive solutions to issues.
Approach solving everyday and legal problems with a “cool” head.
If there is nothing connecting you with your ex-spouse, then you can safely just let go of this relationship and move on with your life.
If you have children together, then you need to try to improve the relationship (of course, if the spouse is not dangerous for the child), at least as with a colleague. To do this, try to remember what united you and your spouse and name his positive qualities.

Independence is independence, but remember that if there are children in the family, the situation looks completely different.

What to do if there are children between you?

The situation of divorce is always complicated when there are minor children in the family. This is not about legal subtleties or alimony. This is a different area. My duty from the perspective of psychology is to highlight another question: how to separate marriage from parenthood and?

There is a situation when discord with the spouse is projected onto the child, which is why the father tries not to see him at all. Here you, unfortunately, are powerless. You can try to come to an agreement with your ex-husband and convey the truth about the child’s innocence. Some men are open to dialogue. But the last word remains with the spouse.
There is another situation when, along with a divorce, one of the parents loses their children. Often, for example, the father is prohibited from seeing the child, although both parties (child and father) wish this. I’ll say right away that if this is not your case, then congratulations and permission to skip this section. If this is one of the pressing questions, then I advise you to read the material to the end.

Even if you are no longer husband and wife, you remain parents. A child needs care, material and moral support, and an example. Divorce does not eliminate parenthood. I’m not forcing anything and I don’t want to offend anyone, but I must mention that removing the father from the child has no better effect on the socialization of your child.

If the reason your marriage ended was something like cheating, then you are likely experiencing more negative feelings. And your desire to completely exclude your spouse from your life is understandable. But please consider your ex-spouse not as a lover or a partner, but as a father. Was he doing his fatherly duty? Provided for the children, talked to them, played with them? If he was not a bad father (did not beat or humiliate the children, did not have a bad influence on them), then allow him to continue to be in this status.

I'm sure you are a wise woman and a good mother. If the relationship with the father does not threaten the life and safety of the child, then there is no point in breaking this thread. You are responsible for your child. And such a bold and significant step (to step over yourself a little for the sake of the child) is part of this responsibility.

On a note

Divorce has long been the subject of study by great minds. I suggest you take a break and read the aphorisms of outstanding psychologists and psychotherapists for the sake of education and to consolidate the main thoughts about the situation of divorce. Maybe it will be useful for status on a social network (we don’t lose our sense of humor).

D. Gottman: “Divorce is better than a marriage that looks like war.”
K. Whitaker: “You can become an ex-husband, but not an ex-father.”
G. Figdor: “It is not the divorce itself that leads the child to disastrous consequences for him, but the divorce that is not completely completed, that is, in fact, a “failed divorce.”
D. Wallerstein: “Every relationship contains the possibility that a beautiful savior from a dream will turn into its opposite; the angel will become a treacherous and rejecting demon. A once idealized partner can turn into a dangerous, destructive evil.”

What else do you need to know about the intricacies of divorce? Find out from the video.

Results

Overcoming a divorce requires conscious effort and hard work on yourself. You need to not just survive the divorce, but work through it. Remember the main goal is to achieve independence.

It has been noted that women experience divorce more emotionally and deeply, but return to psychological normality faster. The depth of experience is greater among those women who received a divorce proposal rather than endured it.
Only 27% of women remarry. However, new relationships are entered into in almost 100% of cases.
On average, women survive a divorce in six months to a year, and men in one and a half years. I think this fact will add pleasant emotions to your confidence.

I would like to note that if it was not the divorce, but the marriage that caused serious damage (there was violence, aggression and other antisocial behavior), then perhaps we are talking about a completely different problem -. That is, the fact of divorce brought undeniable relief, but the fear of a new life is associated with life in marriage. In this case, I recommend that you seek advice from a psychotherapist.

And on the topic of overcoming divorce, I recommend goodbye to the book by E. G. Rykhalskaya “Love in a woman’s life: the path from separation and loneliness to mature relationships.” The author, in accessible, everyday language, describes the complex psychological foundations and aspects of a woman going through a divorce. By the way, reading a book is a great reason to switch your attention.

I wish you success in writing a new chapter in life. I believe in you!