Recommendations for conflict resolution in children of senior preschool age in the kindergarten group. Topic: "the formation of conflict-free communication skills in children of senior preschool age

Julia Fedorova
Lesson-conversation "Communication without conflicts"

target audience: minors aged 11-14 years.

Forms and methods of conducting: occupation - conversation

Target: Consolidate the knowledge of children with the basics conflict-free communication.

Tasks:

Introduce students to the concepts « conflict» , "compromise"

Build skills knowledge conflict-free communication.

Cultivate respect for the people around you.

To form socially approved forms of behavior.

Equipment: posters with sayings, computer, presentation, two boxes for the game, tablets, masks for scenes.

Expected Result: minors must consolidate knowledge of skills conflict-free communication.

Work plan

1. Ritual of the beginning - warm-up "Drawing in pairs"

2. Introduction.

3. The main part is reading a poem, analyzing situations, rules.

4. Final part.

5. Reflection.

1. Greeting - exercise - warm-up "Drawing in pairs"

The group is divided into pairs, each of which receives one sheet of paper and one pencil. Each pair, holding a pencil together, should draw a picture on their sheet of paper. It is impossible to communicate with words.

2. Introduction.

Probably each of us at some point found ourselves in the epicenter conflict. Let's figure out what is « conflict» ? Who will say? (children's answers)

Conflict It is a clash of interests, a confrontation. Confrontation is generated by our goals. Imagine a room where one person wants to sleep and another wants to watch TV or listen to music. If one achieves its goal, then the other, on the contrary, moves away.

Today we will try to consider conflicts in detail. And the theme of our today class is called« Communication without conflict» .

3. The main part.

Let's look at a few rules in the solution conflict situations.

Reading a poem "Two goats"

One day two goats fought on the lawn,

They fought for fun, not out of malice.

One of them kicked his friend softly,

Another of them quietly butted his friend.

One butted a friend a little harder,

The other butted the friend a little more painfully.

One got excited, kicked with all his strength,

Another hooked him under the belly with horns.

Who is right and who is wrong is a confusing question

But the goats fight not in jest, but in earnest.

I remembered this fight when in front of me

At the school break, the same fight broke out.

Can this be called friendly communication?

The quarrel can turn into conflict?

What's happened conflict? (This is a clash, a serious disagreement, an argument)

What could be the source conflict? (Misunderstanding, mistrust, lack of communication)

Analysis of situations:

1. One of the comrades pushed you or knocked you down. How will you do it?

Be crying

Hit him

Make a note to him

Don't say anything

Complain to an adult

I'll make a note to him.

2. You're out of luck: you lose in checkers for the second time in a row. Your actions?

Be crying

Keep playing

Start getting angry

Don't say anything

I will continue to play.

3. A friend grabbed your eraser without permission. How will you do it?

Push and take away the eraser

Take away the eraser and take his pencil in revenge

Tell an adult

Ask for the eraser back, and if it doesn't, tell an adult.

Let's take a look at a few rules together. conflict-free communication:

Rule 1 - "Try to live in such a way that people feel good with you".

Rule 2 - “Before you address a person, smile to him After all, good relationships begin with a smile.

Rule 3 - “Learn to rejoice not only in your successes, but also in the successes of your comrades”

Rule 4 - "Try to help a friend, don't wait to be asked"

Rule 5 - “Never envy anyone and never snitch: sneak embitters people and destroys their relationship "

Rule 6 - "In a dispute, be restrained and tactful"

Rule 7 - "Avoid conflicts, quarrels, do not commit rash acts "

Rule 8 - “Never blame anyone. If, after all, reproaches were made and a quarrel occurred, make peace soon ”

Rule 9 - "Learn to cooperate, negotiate, give in, find a compromise"

Exercise "We allow conflict»

The group is divided into pairs, each of which receives a card with a description conflict situation. The task of pupils is to find the best way out of conflict and act out your situation in front of the other participants.

Example situations:

Mom scolds her son for watching TV for half the night instead of sleeping. The son claims that the most interesting films are shown at night.

The girl asks her boyfriend to buy her a beer and a pack of cigarettes. A young man does not like girls who drink.

A classmate has been sitting at your computer for 3 hours and playing different games. You are tired of this.

-Conflict-Is this good or bad? How do you think?

4. Final part.

Minuses:

May be associated with violent methods;

May contribute to depression, pessimism, negative mood;

May lead to disappointment in one's abilities, capabilities;

May lead to negative evaluation of the partner.

pros:

This is a certain form of conflict resolution, we express the unsaid, the grievances and claims that led to it;

Can unite people in the face of an external thunderstorm;

Helps "chill out" and helps relieve stress.

Mobilizes the energy of the participants to find a way out of the current situation;

Allows you to better understand your needs and desires;

Promotes self-assertion of personality.

So we see conflict still has its advantages. It takes us to a new level of understanding the situation, and most importantly, it teaches us in practice how to resolve and how to prevent conflicts in the future. But all these advantages arise only when conflict resolved.

5. Reflection.

What is remembered for lesson?

What have you learned?

What was more relevant for you, and what did you already know before?

Related publications:

Conversation for parents

Municipal preschool educational institution

Kindergarten of a general developmental type "Kid"

Zheleznodorozhny settlement

S.V. Zarubina

Organization conflict-free communication of preschool children

Methodical development

Zheleznodorozhny settlement

educator MDOU "Kid"

Zarubina S.V. Organization of conflict-free communication of children up to school age: methodological development / S.V. Zarubina - Zheleznodorozhny village: MDOU"Baby", 2016.- 14 p.

Annotation:

Conflict-free communication of preschool children;

Methodological development reveals tips, games to create a conflict-free environment in the group;

Methodological development will be useful to the teacher of a preschool institution.

In accordance with the Federal State Educational Standard, one of the directions of the content of preschool education is the social and communicative development of preschoolers, affecting the aspect of interpersonal interaction of children.

The relevance of the work is due to the fact that preschool age is a particularly important period in education, since it is the age of the initial formation of the child's personality.

At this time, in the communication of the child with peers, rather complex relationships arise that significantly affect the development of his personality. Knowledge of the characteristics of the relationship between children in the kindergarten group and the difficulties that they have in this case can be of great help to adults in organizing educational work with preschoolers.

In order to develop in children the ability to understand their own emotional state and the state of other people (emotional component) and to learn ways to prevent conflict and constructive behavior in conflict (behavioral component), it is advisable to include children in play activities with peers.

The game is the main tool in the education of moral relationships with peers. In working with children, you can use collective games, activities, exercise games, dramatization games, fairy tale games, role-playing and board games. The game can be used both as part of a complex lesson, and as an independent lesson. The complex of games that are expedient to include in regime moments is presented in the form of a file cabinet.

Purpose: formation of readiness of preschool children for conflict-free interaction with peers.

To achieve the goal in the process of training, the following tasks are solved:

1. Teaching children constructive ways to manage their own behavior (stress relief, getting rid of anger, irritability).

2. Teaching the skills of conflict-free interaction (resolution of conflict situations), development and enrichment of forms of communication with peers.

3. Familiarization of children with the characteristics of emotional states inherent in a person, teaching them to recognize them by external signals (facial expressions, gestures, etc.).

4. Development in children of the ability to understand the emotional state of another person and the ability to express their own.

5. Development of a self-esteem system, the formation of an adequate attitude towards oneself and others.

6. Help in overcoming negative experiences, building self-confidence.

7. Correction of behavior with the help of role-playing games, the formation of moral ideas.

The whole system of work on the formation of moral relations between pupils should be organized taking into account the age and psychological characteristics of preschool children and be based on the basic principles of child psychology and pedagogy.

It is also necessary to work on the selection of the main methods, techniques and forms of work on the formation of moral relationships among preschoolers.

Working in this direction, it is advisable to adhere to the following classification of methods of moral education, which was proposed in her research by Doctor of Pedagogical Sciences V.I. Loginov, and which combines all methods into three groups:

1) methods of forming moral behavior: accustoming, exercise, management of activities;

2) methods of forming moral consciousness: persuasion in the form of clarification, suggestion, conversation;

3) methods of stimulating feelings and relationships: example, encouragement, punishment.

In the work on the formation of moral relationships, it is advisable to use ethical conversations. When talking with children, you need to encourage them to think and talk. By asking them two or three questions, let the guys speak. This allows you to understand what children think, what they know from personal experience. With the help of a teacher, children learn to fairly evaluate the actions of their peers, and sometimes adults, learn to understand what is possible and what is not, what is good and what is bad.

In the course of an ethical conversation, it is effective to organize the reading and analysis of works of art. To this end, it is necessary to constantly pay special attention to the selection of fiction on the theme of the moral education of preschool children.

Tips for the teacher to create a conflict-free environment in the group.

In dealing with children, more and more often one has to observe the manifestation of such qualities as cruelty, unwillingness and inability to help a peer, sympathize, rejoice with him, inability to yield. Children show intolerance to the individual characteristics of each other.

Therefore, important tasks of the teacher are the formation of humane interpersonal relations between preschoolers and the establishment of a positive microclimate in the group. After all, it is here that children spend most of their time, and peers in the group are their main social circle.

In working with children, you can use the memorization of “mirilok”, conduct a didactic game “What is your mood”. Try to help find the cause of a bad mood. To ask children in a good mood to share a smile with the rest of the children, a funny story that happened to him this morning, you can recall a funny cartoon.

It is very important to create a positive attitude in the group and make it as cohesive as possible. For these purposes, together with the children, you can choose the emblem and motto of the group: “Like a cherry on a branch, children are friends in a group.”

You can organize a “Box of good deeds” in the group and sum up the good deeds at the end of the week. For each good deed, the children put a red chip in it, for each bad deed, a blue one. Thus, the number of good and evil deeds is determined and they reflect on why this happened. It is the general analysis of actions that unites and makes each child think about his actions and about his “contribution” to the common good deeds of the whole group.

Together with the children, “develop” the rules of the “What can and cannot be done” group.

1. Share with a friend. Play in such a way that you do not always try to get the best for yourself.

2. Help a friend. If you know how to do something yourself, teach him.

3. If a friend is in trouble, help him in any way you can.

4. Stop a friend if he does something bad. If a friend is wrong, tell him about it.

5. Do not quarrel, do not argue over trifles. Play together.

6. Don't be arrogant if you do something better than others.

7. Do not envy - rejoice in the success and success of a friend with him.

8. If you did something bad, ask for forgiveness and admit your mistake.

9. Know how to calmly accept help, advice and comments from other guys.

10. Don't snitch, but try to solve the problem with a friend on your own; be able to agree.

11. Be attentive to the emotional state of a friend, try to win honestly.

12. Do not laugh at a friend if he is in trouble.

In this work, you can not do without interaction with parents. Individual conversations, parent meetings, joint leisure activities are held with them.

Card file of games and works of art to familiarize children with the skills of conflict-free behavior, empathy, willingness to help, etc.

Games:

Card #1

Game "Steam Train"

Target: Creating a positive emotional background, developing self-confidence, uniting the group.

Brief description of the game:Children are built one after another, holding on to their shoulders. The "engine" performs various movements, the children repeat after him. The end of the game is to stand in a circle, holding hands.

Card #2

Game "Boot"

Target: Development of cooperation skills in a group of peers, the ability to negotiate.

Brief description of the game:Each pair of children is invited to agree with each other and color their pair of boots the same way.

Card #3

Game "Pass the mask"

Target: Establishing contact with peers.

Brief description of the game:Each of the children passes his facial expression in a circle, and you need to accurately depict the facial expression of your neighbor on the right, then come up with your own and pass it on to the neighbor on the left.

Card number 4

Game "Sorcerer"

Target: Induce positive emotions in children.

Brief description of the game:At the command of the teacher, everyone freezes. The sorcerer tries to make the bewitched laugh. "Laughed" help the sorcerer to laugh.

Card number 5

Game "Only together"

Target: Removing speech clips, developing the ability to analyze actions, familiarity with constructive ways to resolve conflict situations.

Brief description of the game:Children are divided into pairs, turn their backs to each other and try to sit on the floor without looking up from their partner's back, and then stand up in the same way.

Card #6

The game "Unexpected pictures"

Target: Developing the ability to collaborate with peers.

Brief description of the game:Children sit in a circle. Everyone has a piece of paper and a pencil. They start drawing a picture. At the command of the teacher, each child gives his neighbor on the left his piece of paper with a picture, then the neighbor continues to draw a picture of his neighbor on the right, and so on to the end.

Card number 7

Headball game

Target: Development of skills of cooperation, mutual assistance.

Brief description of the game:Children are divided into pairs and lie on the floor opposite each other. You need to lie on your stomach so that the head of one child is next to the head of a partner. The couples place the ball between their heads. Then they need to pick up the ball and stand up by themselves.

Card number 8

Skyscraper game

Target: Developing children's ability to interact with each other, to cooperate.

Brief description of the game:Each of the guys take one or two cubes and build one big skyscraper so that it does not fall apart. Moreover, if the skyscraper falls apart, it will have to be rebuilt. During the game, children discuss with each other how to build a skyscraper.

Card #9

Game "Cardboard Towers"

Target: Formation of adequate self-esteem, development of goodwill.

Brief description of the game:Children are divided into two groups of 6 people. They need to build a cardboard tower in 10 minutes using only tape. Here you can use both the verbal version of the game, and non-verbal.

Card number 10

Game "Collect the picture"

Target: Developing the ability to collaborate with peers.

Brief description of the game:Children are divided into two teams. The teacher gives each team a puzzle. Each team must collect a picture. During the game, the teacher observes the behavior of children, evaluates the ability to cooperate and negotiate.

Works of art:

Card #1

G.H. Andersen "The Ugly Duckling"

Purpose and possibilities of application: Formation of ideas about the conflict, its causes and methods of resolution, training in the analysis of conflict situations, the manifestation of feelings of kindness, compassion.

Card #2

A. Kuznetsova "We quarreled"

Learning to understand the causes of a quarrel and find the right way out of conflict situations.

Card #3

N. Nosov "On the hill"

Purpose and possibilities of application:Education of mutual respect, mutual assistance, education of skillswork in harmony with peers.

Card number 4

V. Oseeva "The Magic Word"

Purpose and possibilities of application:Education of polite behavior, friendly attitude towards others.

Card number 5

V. Suteev "Apple"

Purpose and possibilities of application:Education of honesty, a sense of responsibility for one's actions, respect and courtesy in relationships with peers, the development of pupils' self-esteem.

Card #6

V. Suteev "Snowman - mailer"

Purpose and possibilities of application:Formation of the ability to analyze the actions of heroes, education of a benevolent attitude towards peers, empathy, sympathy, mutual assistance.

Card number 7

A. N. Afanasiev "The Fox and the Hare"

Purpose and possibilities of application:Education of friendliness, a friendly attitude towards peers, sympathy, the ability to analyze the actions of the heroes of a fairy tale.

Card number 8

Russian folk tale "How mushrooms fought with peas"

Purpose and possibilities of application:Formation of the ability to analyze the actions of the heroes of the work, education of friendliness, respectful attitude towards peers; mutual assistance.

Card #9

Y. Ermolaev "Best friend"

Purpose and possibilities of application:Formation of the ability to analyze the actions of heroes; education of friendliness, respect for peers.

Card number 10

K.D. Ushinsky "Blind Horse"

Purpose and possibilities of application:Education of kindness and sensitivity through the emotional perception of the work, familiarization with such moral categories as: goodness, compassion, sympathy, evil.

Conclusion

One of the directions of the content of preschool education is the social and communicative development of preschoolers, affecting the aspect of interpersonal interaction of children.

The formation of children's ideas about conflict-free communication and training in the analysis of conflict situations should be carried out on the material of works of art.

Along with reading fiction, it is necessary to use other means of forming humane feelings: music, nature, painting, illustrations and films.

The main means in the education of moral relationships with peers is the game.

Bibliography

  1. Federal state educational standard for preschool education (approved by order of the Ministry of Education and Science of the Russian Federation of October 17, 2013 No. 1155).
  2. Zedgenidze V. Ya. Prevention and resolution of conflicts among preschoolers: A manual for practitioners of preschool educational institutions. – M.: Iris-press, 2005. – 112 p.
  3. Karabanova O.A. Game in the correction of the psychological development of the child. M.: Russian Pedagogical Agency, 1997. - 191 p.
  4. Kolominsky Ya.L., Zhiznevsky B.P. Socio-psychological analysis of conflicts between children in play activities // Questions of Psychology. - 1990. - No. 2. – P. 37–42.
  5. Loginova, V.I., Samorukova, P.G. Textbook for students of pedagogical institutes. / IN AND. Loginova, P.G. Samorukov. - M .: "Enlightenment", 1983. - 213 p.
  6. Mukhina V.S. Child psychology: A textbook for students of the Pedagogical Institute / Ed. L. A. Venger. - M.: Enlightenment, 2000. - 272 p.
  7. Pershina T.V., Mazurova T.N. The content of the readiness of preschool children for conflict-free interaction with peers // Innovative science and modern society: collection of articles of the International Scientific and Practical Conference (October 25, 2014, Ufa) in 2 hours. Part 1. - Ufa: Aeterna, 2014 . - S. 103 - 105.
  8. Pershina T.V., Pautova A.M., Chirkova M.V. Guidelines for the formation of readiness of children of senior preschool age for conflict-free interaction with peers.// Science and education: new time No. 5, 2015. - P. 633 - 640.

    Municipal Autonomous Preschool Educational Institution

    Kindergarten 4 "Solnyshko"

    Belorechensk municipal formation Belorechensky district

    Workshop

    "Features of conflict-free communication

    with difficult preschool children

    Teacher-psychologist: Sayapina O.K.

    MADOU D/S 4

    Target: formatione skills of conflict-free communication with difficult preschool children.

    Tasks:

    Acquaintanceindividual characteristics of difficult children;

    Development of personal qualities like reflection, empathy, tolerance.

    Cultivating a respectful attitude towards other people;

    Formation of socially approved forms of behavior.

    Course of the workshop:

    Most often, parents, educators and teachers are concerned about such individual characteristics of the child as slowness, stubbornness, imbalance, selfishness, aggressiveness and cruelty, lack of self-confidence, fears, lies, etc. In addition, it is not always clear to us, adults, why the child has no friends, relationships do not develop, he does not go for a walk, because they do not pay attention to him.

    In order to help the child in solving his communication problems, it is necessary to understand the reasons. We refer to them: dysfunctional relationships in the family, which are manifested in the inconsistency and inconsistency of education. Rejection, excessive demands are just some of the features of an inadequate attitude towards a child.

    The main thing, dear parents and educators: do not try to remake the child! Each of these types of temperament has its positive features. Rely on them when communicating with your child!

    restless child

    You suddenly began to notice that the child began to react emotionally to everything that was happening around. Every now and then, tears appear in his eyes, he becomes touchy, and then suddenly attacks of uncontrollable laughter come. The child learns to manage his emotions, he begins to understand that emotions should be adequate to a certain situation. He is not yet very good at coping with them, but ... it will take a little time, and such a carefree and impulsive baby will become more balanced, calm, even, maybe a little withdrawn.

    An adult does not always choose the right tactics of behavior, he begins to scold the child for his "antics" and "tantrums", not fully understanding what they are connected with. And what is the result? Such a sincere, such an open child becomes silent and withdrawn, he moves more and more away from his parents. And then this contradiction deepens, becomes wider and flows into adolescent conflicts.

    It turns out a sad picture ... "What to do?" you ask. - Let's try to pay a little more attention to the emotions of our child. Let's try to understand the reasons for their appearance, as well as help the child get acquainted with various emotions and how they manifest themselves.

    An emotional response that is inappropriate for the situation may be due to the fact that the child simply does not know how to express his emotions. Or there may be another situation: the child becomes nervous because of what he sees around. If mom and dad constantly quarrel, and the child only hears: “Leave me alone!”, “Don't interfere!”, He naturally experiences all this inside himself, and these experiences are manifested in his emotional reactions. What is the reason for this imbalance? Maybe you just need to change the style of relationships in your family a little?

    In any case, it is necessary to introduce the baby to several basic emotions and how they manifest themselves.

    restless child .

    - avoid extremes: you can’t allow a child to do whatever he pleases, but you can’t forbid everything, clearly decide for yourself what is possible and what is not;

    - show your child an example with your behavior: control your emotions, because he imitates you in his behavior;

    - give the child enough attention, let him never feel forgotten, at the same time explain to the child that there are times when you have other worries, you need to understand and accept this;

    - remember that hysterical attacks are most often associated with the desire to attract attention or arouse pity and sympathy. There is no need to indulge the child, there is no need to change your requirements, it is better, when the child calms down, to explain to him why you did this and not otherwise.

    Child with self-esteem disorder

    We constantly compare ourselves with other people and, on the basis of this comparison, develop an opinion about ourselves, about our capabilities and abilities, our character traits and human qualities. This is how our self-esteem develops. But often parents forget that this process begins at a very early age. Which of us has not heard such remarks: “Well, look how Petya did. What happened to you again?!" Or: “You are already so big, but you still haven’t learned how to tie your shoelaces (eat porridge, read letters, etc.!”) Many, many such statements can be heard from adults who do not think about the fact that it is from their assessments that the child’s opinion about himself is formed, in the first place. In the family, the child learns for the first time whether they love him, accept him is, whether success or failure accompanies it. At preschool age, the child develops a sense of well-being - trouble, which to some extent can help us to guess what he will become in the future. Our self-esteem may be too high or too low, or it may be in the middle. It is important that the way the child evaluates himself coincides with his real capabilities.

    Activity, resourcefulness, cheerfulness, a sense of humor, sociability, a desire to make contact - these are the qualities that are characteristic of childrenwith adequate self-esteem . They willingly participate in games, are not offended if they are losers and do not tease others if they win. Passivity, suspiciousness, increased vulnerability, touchiness are often characteristic of children.with low self-esteem . They do not want to participate in games because they are afraid to be worse than others, and if they participate in them, they are often offended and leave. Sometimes children who are given a negative assessment in the family tend to compensate for this in communication with other children. They want to always and everywhere be the first and take to heart if this fails.

    With high self-esteem, children strive to be better than others in everything. Often you can hear from such a child: “I am the best (strong, beautiful). You should all listen to me." Such a child is sometimes aggressive towards others who also want to be leaders of the children's group.

    And nowA few tips for developing adequate self-esteem .

    - Do not protect the child from everyday affairs, do not seek to solve all the problems for him, but do not overload him with what is beyond his strength. Let the child complete the tasks available to him and receive satisfaction from what he has done.

    - Do not overpraise the child, but do not forget to encourage him when he deserves it. Remember that praise, like punishment, must be commensurate with the deed.

    - Encourage initiative in your child. Let him be the leader in all endeavors, but also show that others can be better than him in some way.

    - Do not forget to encourage others in the presence of the child. Emphasize the other's strengths and show that your child can also achieve this.

    - Show by example the adequacy of the attitude to successes and failures. Evaluate aloud your capabilities and results of the case.

    - Don't compare your child to other children. Compare it with yourself (the way it was yesterday and, perhaps, will be tomorrow).

    conflict child

    There are many factors that cause eternal quarrels and contribute to the development of conflict. For example, a bully child grows up in a family. He constantly bullies his children, with whom he communicates if he knows that they will not give him back. Perhaps such a child lacks attention and care in the family, and he strives to be in the center of attention, and a fight is a good way not only to be in the center, but also to show his superiority over others. Another situation: a child who is constantly “looking for” trouble. It seems that he deliberately provokes other children, and in the end he himself becomes a victim of the conflict. Such a child needs parental help even more than a bully, because his behavior is in itself, or, as they like to say. some parents, "with age", does not go away.

    For communicating with conflict children, it is very important how consistent you are in your desire to achieve an end to endless quarrels. Some, asking the child to stop the quarrel, do not show due confidence, others are constantly nervous, because they expect quarrels from children, complain to others, often in the presence of the child; others have some kind of hidden humility in front of this trait of the child's character, they perceive his conflict communication as inevitable. However, the conflict behavior of the child can and should be dealt with. But first, it is important to identify the causes of conflict. There may be several. Perhaps conflict is a consequence of your child's selfishness. If he is the unconditional center of everyone's attention and his slightest desire is immediately fulfilled, then, of course, the child expects the same attitude towards himself and from other children and, of course, does not receive it. Then he begins to achieve this by provoking conflicts. In this case, parents need not only to slightly change their attitude towards the child, but also to teach him to communicate without conflict with other children.

    The reverse situation is also possible, when the child in the family is “abandoned”. He takes out the feelings accumulated in his little soul in a quarrel. Or maybe the child sees how mom constantly quarrels with dad at home, and just starts to imitate their behavior.

    In any case, almost always the child's conflict behavior is a signal that something is wrong with you, dear parents. Therefore, when dealing with a conflict child, be prepared for the fact that you will have to change your behavior somewhat. This can sometimes be quite difficult to do, but it will be very difficult for you to achieve success without such a change.

    A few tips regarding the style of behavior with conflict children.

    - restrain the child's desire to provoke quarrels with others. You need to pay attention to unfriendly glances at each other or muttering something with resentment under your breath.

    - do not seek to end the quarrel by blaming another child for its occurrence and defending your own. Try to objectively understand the causes of its occurrence;

    - after the conflict, discuss with the child the reasons for its occurrence, identify the wrong actions of your child that led to the conflict. Try to find other possible ways out of the conflict situation;

    - Don't talk about behavior problems with your child. He can establish himself in the idea that conflicts are inevitable, and will continue to provoke them;

    - it is not always necessary to intervene in the quarrels of children. For example, when two boys did not share something during the game and began to quarrel, it is better to observe this conflict, but not interfere in it, because the children themselves will be able to find a common language, and at the same time they learn to communicate with each other. If, during quarrels, one of them always wins, and the other acts as a "victim", such a game should be interrupted in order to prevent the formation of timidity in the loser.

    shy child

    Shyness is a feature common to so many people, both children and adults. Perhaps it can even be called the most common reason that complicates communication. Shyness can be a mental illness that cripples a person no less than the most severe disease of the body. Its consequences can be devastating:

    - shyness prevents you from meeting new people, making friends and enjoying pleasant conversations;

    - it keeps a person from expressing his opinion and asserting his rights;

    - shyness does not give other people the opportunity to appreciate the positive qualities of a person;

    - it exacerbates excessive focus on oneself and one's behavior;

    - shyness interferes with clear thinking and effective communication;

    - shyness is usually accompanied by negative feelings of loneliness, anxiety and depression.

    To be shy means to be afraid of people, especially those from whom, in the opinion of the child, some kind of emotional threat comes. Today, in psychology, there is a widespread point of view that shyness is the result of a reaction to the emotion of fear, which occurs at a certain moment when a child interacts with other people and is fixed.

    Maybe a child in his 5 or 6 years has already experienced several times the experience of unsuccessful communication with people in certain situations, or knows how to communicate, but for certain internal reasons does not want to. He may feel inadequate in his own behavior and experience constant anxiety about his actions. The feeling of inadequacy associated with communication can also lead to self-abasement ("I'm shy", "I'm pathetic", "I'm incapable", "I can't live without my mother")

    To help a child overcome shyness, to form a desire to communicate in him, is the common task of teachers and parents. This task is solvable, but it must be done while the child is still small. With age, a shy child already develops a certain style of behavior, he begins to be aware of this “lack” of his. However, awareness of one's shyness not only does not help, but even prevents one from overcoming it. The child is unable to overcome his shyness, because he does not believe in his own strength, and the fact that he fixes attention on the features of his character and behavior fetters him even more.

    Let's think together and develop a certain style of behavior with shy children:

    - expand your child's circle of acquaintances, invite friends to your place more often, take your baby to visit familiar people, expand walking routes, teach your baby to be calm about new places;

    - do not constantly worry about the child, strive to completely protect him from all sorts of dangers, mostly invented by you, do not try to do everything for the child yourself, prevent any difficulties, give him a certain measure of freedom and open actions;

    - constantly strengthen the child's self-confidence, in their own abilities;

    - involve the child in various tasks related to communication, create situations in which a shy child would have to come into contact with an "alien" adult. For example: “We need to find out what this interesting book with wonderful pictures is about. Let's ask the librarian (seller) and ask him to let us see it. Usually, in such a situation of “forced” communication, for example, at a doctor’s appointment, in a children’s library, visiting a neighbor, the child is initially so constrained that he greets only in a whisper, averting his eyes, and not looking up from his mother’s hand. But, when leaving, he says goodbye loudly and distinctly, sometimes even smiling.

    Sometimes shyness in a child goes away with age. But, unfortunately, such a happy overcoming of shyness is not always found. Most children need help from adults: parents on the one hand and kindergarten teachers on the other. The work of overcoming shyness must be done in concert, constantly and patiently. It requires caution and delicacy from adults, because shy children may react to the intervention of adults in a completely different way than you expect from them. Special tact in relation to such children is required from the educator: in the group in front of the "spectators" self-doubt becomes greater, and the child reacts more sharply to all words and actions addressed to him.

    closed child

    “What is the difference between being shy and withdrawn?” - you ask. To answer this question, let's remember how we determined the child's communication skills at the beginning: these are some individual psychological characteristics of a personality that include three components:

    - I want to communicate with others (communication motivation).

    - I know how to communicate with others (familiarity with communication skills).

    - I can communicate with others (level of mastery of communication skills).

    A shy child knows how to communicate with others, but does not know how, cannot use this knowledge.

    A closed child does not want and does not know how to communicate. In this difference in the psychological characteristics of the communication of closed and shy children lies the secret of correcting these personal qualities.

    The insularity of the child has, of course, its origins.

    It appears in the child's behavior quite early and usually has such prerequisites at an early age as anxiety, emotional instability, tearfulness, a general reduced mood, deterioration in appetite and sleep disturbance due to the slightest changes in the child's life (moving to the country house, visiting and so on.). These children are also characterized by fear of strangers, long-lasting anxiety and stiffness when they get into a new situation.

    As a rule, such children are very attached to their mother and very painfully endure even a short absence of her.

    When communicating with a closed child, it is necessary to constantly expand the circle of his passive communication, for example, talking in the presence of a baby with someone unfamiliar or unfamiliar. At the same time, try to create conditions in which the child would feel calm and safe, for example, when talking, hold his hand or stroke his head.

    In the process of gradually introducing the child to society, he gradually forms a calm and adequate attitude to communication, develops the necessary communication skills, and improves his speech. Closeness can and should be corrected. But first, a few tips for working with withdrawn children:

    - expand your child's social circle, take him to new places and meet new people;

    - emphasize the benefits and usefulness of communication, tell the child what new and interesting things you learned, as well as what pleasure you got when communicating with this or that person;

    - strive to become an example for the child of an effectively communicating person;

    - if you notice that, despite your efforts, the child is becoming more withdrawn and withdrawn, seek the advice of a psychologist who will professionally help you solve this problem.

    The work of overcoming isolation is quite complex and long-term. Miracles do not happen, and your child's isolation will not pass in one day with the wave of a "magic wand". Therefore, be patient and prepare for the long work that must take place constantly in the course of your communication with the child.

    Conclusion

    However, when working with a child, remember that in the life of a small person there is not, and cannot be, any psychological, behavioral deviations that are not connected to some extent with the characteristics of the family, the adults around him, their feelings, actions.Changing the behavior of a child is an unrealistic task, if you do not look at yourself, do not change yourself.

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    Bibliography:

      Zazulskaya, O. V. Formation of friendly relations between preschoolers / O. V. Zazulskaya // Child in kindergarten. – 2006.

      Zinchenko, L. Try to negotiate: the organization of communication of children in small groups / L. Zinchenko // Preschool education. – 2001.

      The game of a preschooler / L. A. Abramyan, T. V. Antonova and others; Ed. S. L. Novoselova.-M .: Education, 1989.

      Kozlova S.A., Kulikova T.A. Preschool Pedagogy. – M.: Academy, 2000.

      Miklyaeva N.V. Preschool Pedagogy. Theoretical and methodological foundations of correctional pedagogy: textbook. allowance for students of higher education. and avg. textbook institutions / N.V. Miklyaeva, Yu.V. Miklyaev; under. ed. IN AND. Seliverstov. – M.: VLADOS, 2008.

    6. Panfilova M.F. Game therapy of communication. - M .: LLP "IntelTech", 1995.

    Send your good work in the knowledge base is simple. Use the form below

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    Department of Education of the City of Moscow

    StatebudgetaryeducationalinstitutionhigherprofessionaleducationcitiesMoscow

    Moscowurbanpedagogicaluniversity"

    Institute of Pedagogy and Psychology of Education

    All-Institute Department of Educational Psychology

    DIPLOMAJOB

    Development of conflict-free behavior skills in senior preschool age

    Mokan Tatyana Vladimirovna

    Specialty - 031100 Pedagogy and methods of preschool education

    (extramural studies)

    Scientific supervisor: Dvoinin A.M. Candidate of Psychological Sciences, Assoc.

    Moscow2013

    preschool conflict disagreement game psychological

    Introduction

    1. Theoretical foundations for studying the problem of conflict behavior in children of older preschool age

    1.1 The concept of conflict, its psychological characteristics and causes

    1.2 Features of children's conflicts in senior preschool age

    1.3 The specifics of the conditions created for the development of skills of conflict-free behavior of children

    2. Experimental study of the development of conflict-free behavior skills by means of play activities in children of senior preschool age

    2.1 Identification of the level of conflict behavior in children of older preschool age

    2.2 Development of skills of conflict-free behavior of older preschoolers in play activities

    2.3 Evaluation of the effectiveness of the organization of gaming activities for the development of skills of conflict-free behavior

    Conclusion

    Bibliography

    Applications

    Introduction

    Relevance. Preschool age is a particularly responsible period in education, since it is the age of the initial formation of the child's personality. At this time, in the communication of the child with peers, rather complex relationships arise that significantly affect the development of his personality. Knowledge of the characteristics of the relationship between children in the kindergarten group and the difficulties that they have in this case can be of great help to adults in organizing educational work with preschoolers.

    Obviously, a child's communication with peers is a special area of ​​his life, which differs significantly from communication with adults. Close adults are usually attentive and friendly to the baby, they surround him with warmth and care, teach him certain skills and abilities. With peers, things are different. Children are less attentive and friendly, they are usually not too eager to help each other, support and understand their peers. They can take away a toy, offend, not paying attention to tears. And yet, communication with other children brings a preschooler incomparable pleasure.

    The ability to establish positive relationships with others and its role in the development of personality has always been given great importance. In this regard, difficulties in relationships between people and ways to overcome them are the subject of special attention of educators and psychologists, especially if we are talking about children.

    It is at preschool age that ideas about conflict and a conflict situation are formed, the nature of which largely determines the real behavior of a preschooler in a conflict.

    The positive meaning of the conflict lies in the disclosure of his own capabilities for the preschooler, in the activation of the personality as the subject of preventing, overcoming and resolving the conflict. In this regard, the problem arises of finding forms and methods of organizing conditions for the maximum realization of the constructive potential of conflicts among preschoolers.

    Conflicts among preschoolers have their own pronounced specificity, determined by the simultaneous impact of conflict factors of various nature and the age characteristics of preschoolers. Practice shows that the most common ways to overcome the conflict of preschoolers is the neutralization of aggressive and hostile manifestations, the breeding of conflicting parties, the removal of conflict factors. All these are ways that reduce the activity of preschoolers themselves.

    However, the readiness of a preschooler for constructive behavior in a conflict is formed in special conditions, the creation of which is the subject of the work of teachers who own the methods of personal development of preschoolers.

    The problem of conflict and conflict interaction is well covered in pedagogy and psychology. Many domestic and foreign researchers addressed the problem of conflict in preschool age: L.S. Vygotsky, D.B. Elkonin, Ya.L. Kolominsky, A.V. Zaporozhets and others. They believe that in preschool age conflicts most often arise about the game, since it is the leading activity of preschoolers. According to the data obtained, children of older preschool age are in conflict over the distribution of play roles, as well as over the correctness of play actions.

    The analysis of the studies allowed us to identify the contradiction between the need to prevent conflict behavior among older preschoolers in kindergarten and the insufficient development of the relevant conditions, as well as the lack of knowledge by educators of ways to prevent conflict behavior in older preschoolers. Thus, the relevance of the study is due to the importance of the problem of preventing conflict behavior in children of older preschool age.

    The research problem is how to develop the skills of conflict-free behavior in children at senior preschool age.

    Targetresearch- identification of psychological and pedagogical conditions for preventing conflict behavior of children of senior preschool age.

    An object- conflict behavior of children of senior preschool age.

    Item- psychological and pedagogical conditions that contribute to the prevention of conflict behavior in children of older preschool age.

    theoreticalbasis studies have revealed provisions on the high susceptibility of children to the psychological and pedagogical influences of L.S. Vygotsky, B.C. Mukhina, S.T. Jacobson; theory about the essence of personality K.A. Abulkhanov-Slavskoy, L.I. Bozhovich, A.N. Leontiev, S.L. Rubinstein; provisions on the development and complication of attitudes, on the basis of which the possibility of self-regulation of the behavior of A.V. Ermolina, E.P. Ilyina, Ya. Z. Neverovich; provisions on the essence of the conflict, the causes of its occurrence and ways of resolving A.A. Bodaleva, V.O. Ageeva, N.V. Grishina, N.I. Leonova, A.G. Zdravomyslova; theories of conflict: psychoanalytic (Z. Freud, A. Adler, E. Fromm); sociotropic (W. McDougall, S. Sigle); behavioral (A. Bass, A. Bandura, R. Sears).

    Hypothesis of our study lies in the assumption that the process of developing the skills of conflict-free behavior in children of senior preschool age will be effective with the purposeful creation of the following psychological and pedagogical conditions:

    The use of a complex of interactive games in working with children aimed at building cohesion and cooperation, teaching effective ways of communication, forming a claim to social recognition and removing conflict in children;

    Playing with children in conflict situations and modeling a way out of them;

    The use of psycho-gymnastic studies in work with children aimed at the formation of motives for positive behavior.

    Based on the relevance, purpose, object and subject of research, we have identified the following tasks:

    1. Expand the concept of conflict, its psychological characteristics and causes.

    2. To identify the features of children's conflicts in the senior preschool age.

    3. Conduct an empirical study to determine the level of conflict in children of older preschool age.

    4. To put into practice a system of classes to develop the skills of conflict-free behavior in gaming activities.

    5. Determine the effectiveness of the system of classes for the development of skills of conflict-free behavior in gaming activities.

    When considering the state of the problem under study, the following were used in practice: methods:

    1. Theoretical analysis of literature.

    2. Methodology "Observation in the game" (A.I. Anzharova).

    3. Method "Pictures" (Kalinina R.R.).

    4. Quantitative and qualitative analysis of the obtained data.

    theoreticalsignificance we have identified a pedagogical way to prevent conflict behavior in children of older preschool age through specially organized psychological and pedagogical conditions: the use of a complex of interactive games in working with children; playing out conflict situations and modeling a way out of them; use of psycho-gymnastic studies.

    Practicalsignificance The research lies in the possibility of organizing the pedagogical conditions justified by us by teachers and psychologists of preschool educational institutions in solving problems of preventing conflict behavior in children of older preschool age.

    This thesis research consists of an introduction, two chapters, a conclusion, a list of references.

    Baseempiricalresearch: GBOU Lyceum No. 1557. The study involved pupils of the senior group in the amount of 20 people, the age of children is from 5 to 6 years.

    1. TheoreticalbasicsstudyProblemsconflictbehavioratchildrenseniorpreschoolage

    1.1 conceptconflict,hispsychologicalcharacteristicAndcausesoccurrence

    Conflicts have always existed, at all times and among all peoples. The word conflict comes from the Latin "conflictus", which means "collision" in translation. As a scientific term, this word is used in a close but not identical sense in psychology.

    The use of the term "conflict" is found in the development of problems of personality psychology, in general, medical, social psychology, psychotherapy, pedagogy and political science. Conflicts are considered by Western psychologists mainly in the spirit of the traditions of the psychoanalytic concept of the nature of the individual, as well as from the positions of cognitive psychology, from the behavioral position and from the standpoint of role-playing approaches.

    There are also known theories of conflicts, such as the theory of structural balance by F. Haider, the structural-functional approach of T. Parsons, the theory of social conflict by L. Kozer, the theory of conflictology by W.F. Lincoln, M. Deutsch's cognitive theory, C. Thomas's theory of behavior strategy in a conflict situation. In connection with such a variety of theories devoted to the problems of conflicts, the authors offer a large number of definitions of this concept, which depend on their point of view on the nature of the biological and social, and on the view of conflict as a personal or mass phenomenon, etc. Grishina N.V. Psychology of conflict. St. Petersburg: Peter, 2000.

    M. A. Robert and F. Tilman define conflict as follows: it is a state of shock, disorganization in relation to the previous development. Conflict is a generator of new structures. As you can easily see, the last phrase in this definition indicates the positive nature of conflicts and reflects the modern point of view that in effective organizations conflicts are not only possible, but also desirable. Antsupov A.Ya., Shipilov A.I. Conflictology. M., 1999.

    The definition of J. von Neumann and O. Morgenstein is as follows: conflict is the interaction of two objects with incompatible goals and ways to achieve these goals. As such objects can be considered people, separate groups, armies, monopolies, classes, social institutions, etc., whose activities are somehow connected with setting and solving problems of organization and management, with forecasting and decision-making, as well as planning targeted actions. . Zaitsev A.K. Social conflict in the enterprise. Kaluga, 1993., p. 42.

    K. Levin characterizes conflict as a situation in which oppositely directed forces of approximately equal magnitude simultaneously act on an individual. In his works, he considers both intrapersonal and interpersonal conflicts.

    From the point of view of role theory, conflict is understood as a situation of incompatible expectations (requirements) to which a person playing a particular role is exposed. Typically, such conflicts are divided into inter-role, intra-role and personality-role. Yurchuk V.V. Modern Dictionary of Psychology, Minsk, 2000.

    In L. Kozer's theory of social conflict, conflict is a struggle over values ​​and claims due to a lack of status, power and means, in which the goals of opponents are neutralized, infringed or eliminated by their rivals. The author focuses on the positive function of the conflict - maintaining the dynamic balance of the social system. If the conflict, according to Coser, is associated with goals, values ​​or interests that do not affect the foundations of the existence of groups, then it is positive. If the conflict is connected with the most important values ​​of the group, then it is undesirable, since it undermines the foundations of the group and carries a tendency to destroy it. Social conflictology / Ed. A.V. Morozov. M., 2002.

    The founder of an independent direction in the study of conflicts in American sociology and social psychology - conflictology - W. F. Lincoln approaches the consideration of conflict from the standpoint of common sense and pragmatism and adheres to the following working definition of conflict: conflict is an understanding, imagination or fear of at least one side of that that its interests are violated, infringed and ignored by the other party or parties. And two or more parties are ready to fight for the capture, suppression or destruction of the interests of rivals in order to satisfy their own interests. In essence, the conflict is a competition in satisfaction of interests, in fact, a conflict of interests.

    In Russian psychology, the following definition is most common: a conflict is a collision of oppositely directed, incompatible with each other tendencies in the mind of a single individual, in interpersonal interactions or interpersonal relationships of individuals or groups of people, associated with acute negative emotional experiences. Yurchuk V.V. Modern Dictionary of Psychology, Minsk, 2000, p.347

    So, conflict is an open confrontation, a clash of two or more subjects and participants in social interaction, the causes of which are incompatible needs, interests and values.

    According to the forms of manifestation, conflicts take place in all areas of public life. I.E. Vorozheikin, A.Ya. Kibanov, D.K. Zakharov distinguish socio-economic, ethnic, international, political, ideological, religious, military, social and domestic. Conflicts are also distinguished by their significance for a group of people, as well as the way they are resolved. There are constructive and destructive conflicts. Constructive conflicts are characterized by disagreements that affect the fundamental aspects, the problems of people's life and the resolution of which brings the group to a new, higher and more effective level of development. Destructive conflicts lead to negative, often destructive actions.

    The division of conflicts into types is rather arbitrary, there is no rigid boundary between them.

    There is a huge variety of causes of conflicts, due to various situations of interaction between people. A.A. Bodalev argues that the conflict as a whole is caused by three groups of reasons due to:

    labor process;

    Psychological features of human relationships, that is, likes and dislikes, the actions of the leader;

    The personality of the members of the group. Bodalev A.A. Personality and communication. - M.: Pedagogy, 1983.

    According to E. Meliburda, human behavior in a conflict situation depends on the following psychological factors:

    · active perception of the conflict;

    openness and efficiency of communication, readiness to discuss the problem;

    ability to create an atmosphere of mutual trust and cooperation;

    Adequate self-assessment of their capabilities;

    The desire to dominate

    conservatism of thinking, views;

    principles and straightforwardness of statements;

    A set of emotional qualities of a person. Meliburda E. I-You-We. Progress, 1986.

    The causes of conflicts are as diverse as the conflicts themselves. According to the sources and causes of conflicts are divided into objective and subjective. Objective factors include the natural clash of interests of people in the process of life. The main subjective reasons are the subjective assessment of the partner's behavior as unacceptable, low conflict resistance, poor development of empathy, etc. According to V.Ya. Zengenidze should distinguish between objective causes and their perception by individuals. Objective reasons can be relatively conditionally represented in the form of several fortified groups:

    Limited resources to be distributed;

    Difference in goals, values, methods of behavior, skill level, education;

    Bad communications;

    Interdependence of tasks, incorrect distribution of responsibility.

    At the same time, objective reasons are only the causes of conflict when they make it impossible for an individual or a group to realize their needs, they affect personal or group interests. Ya.A. Antsupov, A.I. Shepilov argue that the causes of conflicts are of an objective-subjective nature and can be combined into four groups: objective, organizational and managerial, socio-psychological, personal.

    To the objective causes of conflicts A.Ya. Antsupov attributes the natural clash of interests of people in the course of their life. The typical socio-psychological causes of conflicts include the loss and distortion of information in the process of interpersonal communication, the imbalance of the role interaction of people. Antsupov A.Ya., Shpilov A.I., Conflictology. - M.: Unity, 2000.

    The main personal causes of conflicts, according to A.I. Shipilov are: subjective assessment of the partner's behavior as unacceptable, low conflict resistance, poor development of empathy, inadequate level of claims.

    Any conflict is based on a conflict situation - a hidden or open confrontation between two or more participants, including either conflicting positions of the parties on any occasion, or opposite goals or means of achieving them under given conditions, or a mismatch of interests, desires, and inclinations of opponents. A conflict situation, as a rule, arises in relationships and matures in practical activities; a more or less long period of latent or one-sided dissatisfaction contributes to its emergence. A conflict situation is created both objectively, outside the desire of people, due to the prevailing circumstances, and subjectively, due to the deliberate aspirations of the opposing sides. It can persist for a certain time (often in an open form) without leading to an incident and, consequently, without turning into an open conflict. Royak A.A. Psychological conflict and features of the individual development of the child's personality. M., 1988.

    For a conflict to arise, an incident is necessary - these are practical conflict actions of the participants (parties) of the conflict situation, which are characterized by uncompromising actions and are aimed at the obligatory mastery of the object of heightened mutual interest. An incident usually occurs after a sharp aggravation of the contradiction or when one of the parties begins to infringe on the other and provokes a collision. If the opposite side begins to act, then the conflict from potential turns into actual. Conflict signals are: relationship crisis, communication tension, general discomfort.

    There are a number of stages in the dynamics of the development of the conflict: the presupposing stage is associated with the emergence of conditions under which a clash of interests may arise. These conditions include: a) a long-term conflict-free state of the collective or group, when everyone considers themselves free, does not bear any responsibility to others, sooner or later there is a desire to look for the guilty; everyone considers himself the right side, offended unfairly, then it creates a conflict; conflict-free development is fraught with conflicts; b) constant overwork caused by overload, which leads to stress, nervousness, excitability, inadequate reaction to the most simple and harmless things; c) information-sensory hunger, lack of vital information, prolonged absence of bright, strong impressions; at the heart of all this lies the emotional oversaturation of everyday life. d) different abilities, opportunities, living conditions - all this leads to envy of a successful, capable person. e) style of organizing life and managing a team.

    The stage of the origin of the conflict is the clash of interests of various groups or individuals. It is possible in three main forms: a) a fundamental clash, when the satisfaction of some can definitely be realized only at the expense of infringing the interests of others; b) a clash of interests that affects only the form of relations between people, but does not seriously affect their material, spiritual and other needs; c) there is an idea of ​​a clash of interests, but this is an imaginary, apparent clash that does not affect the interests of people, members of the team.

    The stage of maturation of the conflict - a clash of interests becomes inevitable. At this stage, the psychological attitude of the participants in the developing conflict is formed, i.e. an unconscious readiness to act in one way or another in order to remove the sources of an uncomfortable state. The state of psychological stress encourages an “attack” or “retreat” from the source of unpleasant experiences. Surrounding people can guess about the brewing conflict faster than its participants, they have more independent observations, more free from subjective judgments. The psychological atmosphere of the collective, group can also testify to the maturation of the conflict.

    The stage of awareness of the conflict - the conflicting parties begin to realize, and not just feel the clash of interests. A number of options are possible here: a) both participants come to the conclusion that conflicting relations are inappropriate and are ready to give up mutual claims; b) one of the participants understands the inevitability of the conflict and, having weighed all the circumstances, is ready to give in; the other participant goes for further aggravation; considers the compliance of the other side as a weakness; c) both participants come to the conclusion that the contradictions are irreconcilable and begin to mobilize forces to resolve the conflict in their favor.

    Thus, having studied the concept of conflict, the reasons for its occurrence, we can conclude that conflict is a form of social interaction between two or more subjects that occurs due to a mismatch of desires, interests, values ​​or perceptions. The main personal causes of conflicts are: subjective assessment of the partner's behavior as unacceptable, low conflict resistance, poor development of empathy, inadequate level of claims. Conflicts can be psychological and pedagogical. Conflicts are also distinguished by their significance for a group of people, as well as the way they are resolved. There are constructive and destructive conflicts. Let us consider in more detail the specifics of children's conflicts in the older preschool age.

    1.2 Peculiaritieschildren'sconflictsVseniorpreschoolage

    At preschool age, the leading activity is a role-playing game, and communication becomes its part and condition. From the point of view of D.B. Elkonin, "the game is social in its content, in its nature, in its origin, that is, it arises from the conditions of the child's life in society." since it is here that the learned norms and rules of behavior are formed and actually manifested, which form the basis of the moral development of a preschooler, form the ability to communicate in a team of peers. .-195 p.)

    A conflict situation develops into a conflict only with the joint actions of the child and peers. A similar situation arises in cases where there is a contradiction: between the requirements of peers and the objective possibilities of the child in the game (the latter are below the requirements) or between the leading needs of the child and peers. In both cases, we are talking about the lack of formation of the leading play activity of preschoolers, which contributes to the development of a psychological conflict.

    The reasons may be the child’s lack of initiative in establishing contacts with peers, the lack of emotional aspirations between the players, when, for example, the desire to command prompts the child to leave the game with his beloved friend and join the game with a less pleasant but pliable peer, lack of communication skills. As a result of such interactions, two types of contradictions may arise: a mismatch between the demands of peers and the child's objective capabilities in play, and a mismatch in the motives for the child's play and peers.

    Antsupov A.Ya. identifies seven main causes of conflict in the game:

    1. "Destruction of the game" - this includes such actions of children that interrupt or impede the process of play - for example, the destruction of play buildings, play environment, as well as an imaginary play situation.

    2. “About the choice of the general theme of the game” - in these cases, the dispute arises because of what kind of joint game the children are going to play.

    3. “About the composition of the participants in the game” - here the question is decided who exactly will play this game, that is, who will be included in the game and who will be excluded.

    4. "Because of the roles" - these conflicts arise mainly due to disagreements between children about who will perform the most attractive or, conversely, the least attractive role.

    5. "Because of toys" - disputes due to the possession of toys, game items and attributes are included here.

    6. “About the plot of the game” - in these cases, the children argue about how the game should go, what game situations, characters will be in it, and what will be the actions of certain characters.

    7. “About the correctness of game actions” - these are disputes about whether this or that child acts correctly or incorrectly in the game.

    The empirical data obtained confirm the described by D.B. Elkonin dynamics: in younger children, conflicts most often arise because of toys, in middle-aged children - because of roles, and at an older age - because of the rules of the game. Antsupov A.Ya., Shpilov A.I., Conflictology. - M.: Unity, 2000.

    Thus, the causes of collisions between children reflect their age development, when they gradually move from quarrels over toys to real discussions about how correctly this or that child acts during the game.

    During preschool age, the motivation for the game changes, which significantly affects the content of the child's need for a peer, and interest in a peer as a carrier of human, personal qualities arises in a child only towards the end of preschool age. Activities and relationships of preschoolers / Ed. T. A. Repina. M., 1987.

    As for the younger preschoolers, the need for a peer, to unite with him, appears in the form of a need for him, as a partner in the game. This is precisely the stage in the development of this need, when a child needs a peer for purely practical, non-communicative purposes - to satisfy an acute desire to act and behave like adults. By this period (4 years), mastery of the operations of the game becomes the main, defining requirement for a peer.

    The role of playing skills is so significant that children often prefer a rude, selfish, but "interestingly playing" child to a kind, sympathetic, but unattractive in the game. This does not mean that younger preschoolers are not yet able to assess the personal qualities of partners.

    At this age, most children can quite objectively characterize their comrades in terms of such qualities that are important for joint cooperation, such as kindness, accommodating, etc.

    And, nevertheless, a peer, as noted in the studies of A.A. A royak is necessary for a child during this period, primarily from the side of his playing qualities: the game at this stage acquires a special personal meaning. Peers are especially active in avoiding contact with a child whose insufficiently developed gaming skills are combined with ignorance of positive ways of cooperation, since he constantly interferes in games, interferes with their conduct, and involuntarily destroys buildings created by children. Royak A.A. Psychological conflict and features of the individual development of the child's personality. M., 1988.

    The child is also no less actively rejected by peers with inadequate mastery of the ways of cooperation, which are found, on the one hand, in overly mobile children who do not know how to control their behavior, although they have playing skills and positive ways of cooperation. On the other hand, these are slow children who do not know how to develop the dynamism of actions necessary in play, as a result of which their peers literally run away from them, despite the ability of such children to play and a benevolent attitude towards partners.

    Deprived of the opportunity to fully participate in games, such children cannot satisfy their own acute need for joint play, which ultimately leads to a deep psychological conflict with their peers.

    Giving rise to a conflict situation between the child and peers, the lack of formation of play skills is found in the play interaction of children and leads to a mismatch (contradiction) between the requirements of partners and the objective possibilities of the child in the game. However, as observations show, failure in the game, the impossibility of becoming its full-fledged participant for a long time, does not reduce the effective, active nature of the need itself.

    From the second half of the middle preschool age, children's complaints begin to arise that they "do not take to play," which reflect the infringement of a child's essential need. This is the first symptom of awareness of one's own troubles, the impossibility of becoming a full participant in the game. It is during this period that there are cases of refusal to attend kindergarten, accompanied by a noticeable decrease in activity in making contacts, a gradual departure from peers, and a decrease in mood.

    Awareness of trouble in the game, in such an important "case" for a preschooler, causes him deep feelings, which become especially acute due to the high emotionality of this age, the desire to gain recognition and approval of his merits. And not having received it, the child in every possible way seeks to protect himself from an acutely conflicting traumatic situation, more and more withdrawing into himself, gradually moving away from his peers.

    However, their attitude towards them remains friendly. Understanding one's own failure in the game for a long time does not change the child's personal attitude towards children.

    Distortion of attitudes towards peers appears much later, towards the end of the middle preschool age and indicates the emergence of a new stage in the development of the conflict.

    As A.N. Leontiev, the child himself cannot get out of an acutely dysfunctional situation, his experiences are more and more generalized, deepened and aggravated. As a result, the actions of peers acquire a negative connotation in his eyes, seeming more and more unfair, and cause a tense affective state in the child, which finds an outlet in open emotional protest, in negative behavioral reactions (increased touchiness, stubbornness, distrust, rudeness, anger, up to elements of aggression), which indicates a qualitative change in the attitude towards children and the whole direction of his behavior . Leontiev A.N. Selected psychological works: In 2 volumes - T. II. - M., 1983.

    The negative attitude of peers contributes to the formation in the child of a misconception about himself, a sharp decrease in self-esteem and the level of claims. Success in the game is so significant for a child of this age that its absence leads to a decrease in the most important personality formations - the level of claims and self-esteem associated with it, to a distortion of children's self-consciousness.

    Experiences go a long way to the emergence of qualitative changes in a child’s behavior, in his attitude towards children, towards himself: from impulsive, unconscious emotional reactions to conscious, deep, intense affective states that distort the preschooler’s attitude to himself and, ultimately, his overall positive orientation. . After the emergence of the open stage, the conflict, having become "mutual", interpersonal, continues to develop and escalate.

    A similar conflict with peers also arises when a child, possessing game skills and positive personal qualities, cannot realize them due to the inadequacy of the ways of cooperation. The main reasons in this case may lie in excessive physical activity or, on the contrary, the slowness of the child's actions.

    The situation of failure turns out to be especially negative for overly excitable children: negative behavioral reactions that arise as a result of psychological conflict with peers often acquire a neurotic character.

    An acute conflict with peers, followed by the child's alienation from the children's group, is also observed when, having mastered playing skills, as well as ways of cooperation, the child realizes such skills only partially, constantly lagging behind his peers in his actions. Due to excessive slowness, such children are not able to match the dynamism of actions necessary in the game. As a result, there is no long-term contact with children.

    Kalinina R.R. notes that the diagnosis of psychological conflict in preschoolers in the early stages of its development is very important. Only at this time can it be corrected: teaching such children playing skills, improving their ways of building relationships with peers, combined with the reorientation of the prevailing opinion of peers, further organization of game interaction can restore self-confidence, a joyful mood, increase the initiative to make contacts . Kalinina R.R. Training for the development of the personality of a preschooler: classes, games, exercises. St. Petersburg: Speech, 2001.

    An analysis of cases of psychological conflict between a child and peers reveals that it can be caused not only by unformed operations, but also by some distortion in the motives of the game.

    At preschool age, due to the significant complication of activities, the emergence of role-playing games, the need to reckon with the opinions of peers, be able to manage their immediate desires and coordinate them with the desires of other children, the motivational sphere of the child changes significantly.

    A hierarchy of motives arises, which, in turn, acquire a qualitatively different, peculiar character: mediated, social needs appear that can stimulate the child's activity contrary to his immediate desires, through consciously accepted intentions and goals.

    However, assimilated norms do not always have the necessary motivating force for the child and do not in all cases determine his behavior. Moreover, already at this age there are cases that testify to distortions in the motivation of the child, the predominance of inhumane, selfish motives, often associated with a low level of moral development.

    Especially clearly egoistic tendencies are manifested in the behavior of children with authoritarian motives, in particular, striving for absolute approval in the game in the first roles. These tendencies are even more obvious when such a child manages to establish his position as a leader.

    An authoritarian leader is a child who builds the leadership of the game on the principles of domination-submission. Actively striving for play, such a child is actually driven only by the need for self-affirmation. The general formula for motivating children's play - "not to win, but to play" - here turns out to be distorted: not to play, but to win, to defend one's place as the leader. That is why they prefer to unite with low-initiative, conforming children of the group, who voluntarily take on secondary roles; joint play ceases to attract them if there is no opportunity to "dictate".

    Being unkind to partners in the game, the authoritarian leader experiences a positive emotional state of health: communicating mainly with conforming children, he constantly affirms himself in selfish aspirations. Satisfaction with his position in such cases is evidenced by the high self-esteem and level of aspirations of the child, "businesslike appearance", the very tone in which he speaks with partners in the game, general cheerfulness and activity. Thus, there are no internal contradictions - the desire to suppress others is fully consistent with the moral feelings and beliefs of such a child: he is better than others, since he is a commander. However, such inner "well-being" is in a certain sense immoral in nature, since it is based on the desire to suppress others. Kokh I.A. Conflicts and their regulation. Yekaterinburg, 1997.

    Since such a leader, as a rule, is played by children who voluntarily agree to "second" roles, such associations look outwardly quite favorable. But the results of the study by Prygin B.D. allow us to talk about the existence of a deep psychological conflict in the sphere of interpersonal relations of children. It is evidenced by the absence of any mutual sympathy, the low marks that children give to various skills and qualities of each other, although they can play together for several years. Relationships between peers in kindergarten groups. / Ed. Repinoy T.A. - M .: Pedagogy. - 1978

    Vopel K. notes that the presence of two such conflicting plans for children's relationships with an authoritarian type of game management: one - external, prosperous, the other - deeply conflicting - poses a serious danger both to the development of the personality of the leader and his partners. Fopel K. How to teach children to cooperate. Psychological games and exercises: A practical guide. - Genesis, 2003.

    Receiving support in his egoistic aspirations, such a "dictator" eventually becomes even more authoritarian, confident in his own special significance, psychologically "deaf" to the requests and suggestions of partners, and his behavior, accordingly, even more one-dimensional, devoid of any flexibility.

    In addition, the performance of only secondary roles turns out to be an additional brake on the development of the initiative of his conforming partners, and at the same time such an important ability to develop the game creatively. And as a consequence of the above, the child may develop dependent behavior (because he is deprived of choice) and such undesirable qualities as flattery, obsequiousness, cunning, dependent motivation.

    With the dominance of selfish, authoritarian aspirations, their discrepancy with the democratic tendencies of partners leads to a conflict in interpersonal relations. Its originality lies in the fact that it does not cause intrapersonal conflict: the essential needs of the leader and his partners are constantly satisfied. The contradiction in motives does not affect them and therefore is not recognized by children, which contributes to the hidden (completely) nature of such a conflict.

    Blocking needs, as a rule, distorts the child's personal development, on the one hand, contributes to the emergence of undesirable behavioral traits: self-doubt, distrust of peers, resentment, rudeness, up to elements of aggressive behavior, on the other hand, it negatively affects the child's activity, sharply reducing his activity in the classroom with the objective possession of the necessary knowledge.

    With a lack of satisfaction of the leading need of the child, the development of self-awareness is significantly disrupted, self-confidence and self-confidence are sharply reduced, and self-esteem decreases. As a result, the process of self-regulation of the child and, thus, his personal creativity is inhibited, in the sense that L.I. Antsyferov. Extremely significant in this regard is the existence of harmony between the requirements of peers and the objective possibilities of the child in the game, as well as between the leading needs of the child and peers.

    Thus, the conflict in the motives of the game hinders the development of the child's personality to no lesser extent than the mismatch in the operations of the game. The results of the work of many authors indicate that if the child's need for communication or joint activities with peers is not satisfied, it is not compensated in any way at preschool age, causing the child to experience severe experiences, a state of extreme emotional distress.

    1.3 CreationconditionsFordevelopmentskillsconflict-freebehaviorchildren

    The skill of non-conflict behavior is a well-learned and automated way of acting in a particular situation. The problem of the formation of conflict-free behavior was dealt with by A.V. Zaporozhets, T.E. Sukharev, A.A. Royak, R.V. Ovcharova, A.N. Leontiev. According to these authors, there are many forms of development of conflict resolution skills in preschool age, and the first place among them is played.

    Of particular importance for the development of the child's personality, for the assimilation of elementary norms by him, are relations about the game, since it is here that the learned norms and rules of behavior are formed and really manifest themselves, which form the basis of the moral development of a preschooler, form the ability to communicate in a group of peers. Bondarenko A.K., Matusin A.I. Raising children in the game. - M .: Education. 2003. The game becomes one of the main activities of the child, in which he learns to communicate with peers. The game is one of the effective forms of work of the teacher, helping to prevent conflicts between children.

    The game allows the child to simulate life situations, play out various behaviors in the process of conflict and helps to emotionally detach from looking at the negative situation of communication.

    Game activity is a form of activity in conditional situations, aimed at recreating and assimilating social experience, fixed in socially fixed ways of carrying out objective actions, in subjects of science and culture.

    In the game, as in a special kind of social practice, the norms of human life are reproduced, as well as the intellectual, emotional, moral development of the individual. In the process of gaming activities, conflict resolution skills are formed; there is a restructuring of behavior - it becomes arbitrary, while playing, the child performs two functions at the same time: on the one hand, he performs his role, and on the other, he controls his behavior. The norms underlying human relationships become a source of development of the child's behavior through game training.

    Each of the preschoolers can play in relation to the other the role of an older, equal or younger in their own psychological status. If the preschooler accepts the role assigned to him, then the role conflict does not occur. Therefore, in the game it is important to understand what role the preschooler plays and what role he expects. Psychologically, the most comfortable role is often the role of a senior. But this role is potentially more conflicting, since it is precisely this role that most often does not suit others. He doesn't want to play the role of a junior. Therefore, when organizing role-playing games, the teacher should avoid the distribution of dominant roles. The most favorable for the prevention of role conflict is the interaction of preschoolers on an equal footing. Bondarenko A.K., Matusin A.I. Raising children in the game. - M .: Education. 2003.

    The game only looks carefree and easy on the outside. But in fact, she imperiously demands that the player give her the maximum of his energy, intelligence, endurance, independence. The technology of game methods of prevention is aimed at teaching preschoolers to be aware of the motives of their behavior in the game and in life, i.e. to form the goals of independent activity.

    In pedagogical activity in the prevention of conflicts of preschool children, various methods, techniques and means are used.

    One of the directions is the development of communication skills of children with peers, which includes:

    Firstly, instilling basic social skills: the ability to listen to another and show interest in him, maintain a general conversation, participate in a collective discussion, tactfully criticize and praise the other, teach them to jointly search for mutually beneficial solutions in complex, including conflict situations, training ability to take responsibility.

    Secondly, to teach the child not to apply the measure of perfection to others or to himself, not to allow either accusations or self-flagellation, and also to develop the desire to stay in contact all the time, to learn how to gain experience from failed communication.

    Thirdly, the education of children should be provided:

    a) methods of self-regulation of their state, which would allow them to escape from the power of the conflict, thereby restoring their social flexibility. Mastering the techniques of self-regulation will help the child to lower his tone in time instead of futilely proving his case, or trying to negotiate in a conflict situation instead of responding to it with resentment and avoiding communication;

    b) the ability to control one's feelings, to understand and distinguish the emotional states of other people;

    c) express friendly feelings, sympathy, sympathy and empathy for others.

    As the main methods, techniques, forms of teaching children constructive ways to resolve conflict situations, we suggest using:

    a) plot - role-playing games (with the presence of a problem situation);

    b) simulation games (simulating in "pure form" any "human" process);

    c) interactive games (interaction games);

    d) social - behavioral trainings;

    e) playing out conflict situations and modeling a way out of them;

    f) psycho-gymnastics;

    g) reading and discussion of works of art;

    h) discussions.

    The educator in playful interaction with children can help them realize their values ​​and set priorities, can also help them become tolerant, flexible and attentive, experience less fear, stress and feel less lonely.

    He can teach them simple life wisdom:

    Relationships between people are of great value, and it is important to be able to maintain them so that they do not deteriorate;

    Don't expect others to read your thoughts, tell them what you want, feel and think;

    Don't offend other people and don't let them "lose face";

    Don't attack others when you feel bad.

    Creating conditions for the development of conflict-free behavior skills, the teacher must remember that conflict prevention is most effectively carried out in children's collective activities in the classroom. Joint activities unite children with a common goal, task, joys, sorrows, feelings for a common cause. There is a distribution of responsibilities, coordination of actions. By participating in joint activities, a preschooler learns to yield to the wishes of peers or to convince them that he is right, to make efforts to achieve a common result. Lisetsky M.S. Psychology of interpersonal conflict in senior preschool age./M.S. Lisetsky - M.: Samara. 2006.

    2. Experimentalresearchdevelopmentskillsconflict-freebehaviormeansgameactivitiesatchildrenseniorpreschoolage

    2.1 Revealinglevelconflictbehavioratchildrenseniorpreschoolage

    The experiment was carried out on the basis of GBOU Lyceum No. 1557, Zelenograd. It was attended by 20 children of the older group (8 boys and 12 girls) aged 5-6 years. The experiment consisted of three stages - ascertaining, forming and control. The research work was carried out for 3 months.

    Based on a theoretical analysis of the psychological and pedagogical literature on the research problem, we formulated the following hypothesis: the process of developing the skills of conflict-free behavior in children of older preschool age will be effective if the following psychological and pedagogical conditions are purposefully created: on the formation of cohesion and cooperation, teaching effective ways of communication, the formation of a claim to social recognition and the removal of conflict in children;

    ...

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    with the child on the formation

    Target:

    Tasks:

    Function:

    Corrective, developmental

    Implementation form:

    Lesson 1.

    Target:

    "Go on….."

    My family is...

    My mom says that I...

    If they hit me, I...

    "Call names"

    "My offenders"

    Discharge, positive emotions.

    knocking with the right hand

    2 - at the level of the head,

    "Ha!".

    Lesson 2.

    Greeting "Hello!"

    Exercise "Lines"

    1.happy line

    2.fun line

    3.sad line

    4.evil line

    5.tired line

    6.alarm line

    7. touchy line

    8.kind line

    Exercise "Fighting with hands"

    Exercise "Blanket"

    Imagine this...

    Mood drawing.

    Lesson 3.

    Method "My Universe"

    My favourite hobby

    My favorite color

    My favorite animal

    My favorite season

    My friend

    "Writing Fairy Tales"

    "Mood Drawing"

    Lesson 4.

    Greetings.

    "Terrible-beautiful drawing."

    Discussion.

    The game "Go-you-spirit!"

    "Mirror"

    "Mood Drawing"

    Lesson 5.

    Greetings.

    The game "Talking things".

    Shoes, closet, mirror

    Bicycle, radio, textbook.

    Game "I'm Polite"

    Mood drawing.

    Lesson 6.

    Greetings.

    Game "Shield of Wrath"

    Show your mood.

    Lesson 7.

    Greetings.

    The game "In the Far Far Away Kingdom"

    Game "Gifts"

    Lesson 8.

    Greetings.

    "Silver Hoof"

    "Palm"

    Farewell ritual.

    Remember that for a child

    Process Behavior communication with children

    Remember

    Remember

    Remember

    Remember

    Remember

    Remember

    Remember

    Remember

    Remember

    Plan of individual correctional work

    with the child on the formation

    non-conflict communication skills.

    Target: creation of conditions for the formation of conflict-free communication of a child of preschool age.

    Tasks:

    Development of communication skills

    Help identify your feelings and realize the consequences of your actions in a given situation

    Correction of the emotional-volitional sphere

    Function:

    Corrective, developmental

    Implementation form:

    individual lessons 5-7 years

    Lesson 1.

    Target: diagnosis of negative manifestations

    Conversation with a child. Method "Cacti".

    "Go on….."

    My family is...

    I love it when our family...

    My mom says that I...

    If I do something wrong, then...

    If they hit me, I...

    "Call names"

    Acquaintance with game techniques that promote relaxation in an acceptable form.

    An adult and a child pass the ball to each other, while calling each other all sorts of harmless words. These can be the names of trees, mushrooms, fish, etc.

    Each appeal should begin with the words: “And you ...!”

    "My offenders"

    The child is invited to draw on a piece of paper what or who has ever offended the child, and to whom he would like to take revenge. It is proposed to dress their offenders in funny clothes, to finish them with attributes, or an element, a situation in which they would look funny.

    Discharge, positive emotions.

    knocking with the right hand

    2 - at the level of the head,

    3-4 - at waist level, lean forward and say five times:

    "Hee!", then back and five times:

    "Ha!".

    Speeding up the pace, do this five times, then 4, 3, 2 and 1.

    Lesson 2.

    Greeting "Hello!"

    Say the word "Hello" in different intonations: severely, offended, cheerfully, politely.

    Exercise "Lines"

    Purpose: training in expressing one's emotions in a symbolic, figurative form.

    On a sheet of paper with a pencil, let's try to convey various feelings without drawing anything specific - just simple lines:

    1.happy line

    2.fun line

    3.sad line

    4.evil line

    5.tired line

    6.alarm line

    7. touchy line

    8.kind line

    Exercise "Fighting with hands"

    Purpose: Removal of muscle clamps.

    The child and the adult stand opposite each other, stretching their arms forward, connect them. At the expense of 1,2,3 they rest with their palms so as to push their opponent from their place.

    Exercise "Blanket"

    The blanket fluffs up and sits on a chair:

    Imagine this...

    You can do something with...

    The child can wrinkle, beat, turn over the blanket, etc.

    Mood drawing.

    Show your mood with facial expressions and gestures.

    Lesson 3.

    Greetings. Exercise "Your Name"

    Adult and child say their names. The task of each is to name as many variants of the name of the other as possible.

    Method "My Universe"

    My favourite hobby

    My favorite color

    My favorite animal

    My favorite season

    My favorite fairy tale character

    My friend

    "Writing Fairy Tales"

    The beginning of fairy tales is proposed, come up with a continuation.

    "Mood Drawing"

    Lesson 4.

    Greetings.

    "Quality Names". Creating a friendly atmosphere.

    "Terrible-beautiful drawing."

    An adult and a child each have a sheet of paper and a felt-tip pen.

    First you need to draw a "beautiful drawing."

    Then the adult and the child exchange drawings, each of the received drawing makes "terrible". Then they exchange again and make “beautiful”.

    Discussion.

    The game "Go-you-spirit!"

    Goal: remove negative moods.

    The child walks around the room. Then he stops in front of an adult and says angrily three times: “Tuh-you-spirit!”

    "Mirror"

    "Mood Drawing"

    Lesson 5.

    Greetings.

    Relaxation exercise. Performed in pairs.

    One of the participants conceives a simple drawing, number, letter and draws a finger on the back of another.

    The task of the second is to guess "written".

    The game "Talking things".

    Development of creative activity, empathy.

    Toothbrush, comb, coat

    Shoes, closet, mirror

    Bicycle, radio, textbook.

    Draw three pictures of these objects. Then make up a story.

    Game "I'm Polite"

    Mood drawing.

    Lesson 6.

    Greetings.

    Game "Shield of Wrath"

    The child draws "anger". Then there is a discussion: about an alternative to this feeling, how a person looks and says in a fit of anger. Then the child draws, remakes something in this drawing in order to turn it into kind and funny.

    Show your mood.

    Lesson 7.

    Greetings.

    The game "In the Far Far Away Kingdom"

    Purpose: the formation of a sense of empathy, the establishment of mutual understanding.

    An adult and a child read a fairy tale. Then they draw, depicting the heroes and the memorable event. The child is then asked to place himself in the drawing where he would like to be. Then we ask questions:

    What would you do if you were a hero?

    And what would the hero answer if he asked

    What would you feel if the hero of a fairy tale appeared here

    Game "Gifts"

    The child lists the people he loves, who he likes, and what he would give this person.

    Lesson 8.

    Greetings.

    "Silver Hoof"

    Removing muscle tension, the emergence of confidence in others.

    “Imagine that you are a beautiful, slender, strong, wise deer with your head held high. On your left leg is a silver hoof. As soon as you hit the ground with your hoof three times, silver coins will appear. They are magical and invisible. With each new appearance you become kinder and more affectionate. And although people do not see these coins, they feel the kindness, warmth, affection emanating from you, they are drawn to you, they love you, they like you more and more.

    "Palm"

    Farewell ritual.

    on the formation of communication skills.

    Changing the behavior of an adult and his attitude towards a child

    Build relationships with your child on mutual understanding and trust

    Control the behavior of the child without imposing strict rules on him

    Avoid, on the one hand, excessive softness, and on the other, excessive demands on the child

    Do not give your child categorical instructions, avoid the words “no” and “no”

    Repeat your request with the same words many times

    Use visual stimulation to reinforce verbal instructions

    Remember that excessive talkativeness, mobility and indiscipline of the child are not intentional.

    Listen to what the child has to say

    Do not insist that the child must apologize for the act

    Changing the psychological microclimate in the family

    Give your child enough attention

    Spend leisure time with the whole family

    Don't fight in front of your child

    Organization of the daily routine and place for classes

    Set a solid daily routine for the child and all family members

    Reduce distractions while your child is on a task

    Avoid large crowds as much as possible

    Remember that overwork contributes to a decrease in self-control and an increase in hyperactivity.

    Special Behavior Program

    Do not resort to physical punishment! If there is a need to resort to punishment, then it is advisable to use sitting in a certain place after the act

    Praise your child more often. The threshold for sensitivity to negative stimuli is very low, so childrendo not accept reprimands and punishments, but are sensitive to rewards

    Gradually expand the responsibilities, having previously discussed them with the child

    Do not allow the task to be postponed until another time

    Do not give your child instructions that do not correspond to his level of development, age and abilities.

    Help your child get started on the task, as this is the most difficult stage.

    Do not give multiple directions at the same time. The task that is given to the child should not have complex instructions and consist of several links.

    Remember that for a childthe most effective will be the means of persuasion "through the body"

    Deprivation of pleasure, treats, privileges

    Prohibition of pleasurable activities, walks, etc.

    Reception "off time" (early going to bed)

    Remember that after punishment, positive emotional reinforcement, signs of "acceptance" are needed. In the correction of the child's behavior, the technique of the "positive model" plays an important role, which consists in the constant encouragement of the desired behavior of the child and ignoring the undesirable.

    Parental love will help the child cope with any difficulties.

    Process Behavior communication with children

    Remember You need to let your child know that you accept him the way he is. Try to use such expressions: “You are the most beloved”, “We love, understand, hope for you”, “I love you any”, “What a happiness that we have you”.

    Remember that your every word, facial expressions, gestures, intonation, volume of voice carry a message to the child about his value. Strive to create high self-esteem in your child, reinforcing this with the words: "I rejoice at your success", "You can do a lot."

    Remember that parents who say one thing and do another are eventually disrespected by their children.

    Remember before you begin to communicate with your child, you need to take a position so that you can see his eyes. In most cases, you will have to squat down.

    Remember that you need to express your attitude to the behavior of the child without unnecessary explanations and moralizing. Choose the correct, timely appeal to him, for example: "Sasha, Sashenka, son, son ...".

    Remember that it is necessary to show full interest in the child in the process of communication. Emphasize this with a nod, exclamations. Don't get distracted while listening to it. Concentrate all your attention on it. Give him time to speak, do not rush him and do not emphasize with your appearance that this is no longer interesting to you.

    Remember that many of the attitudes they receive from you determine their behavior in the future. Don't tell your child what you don't really want him to do.

    Remember that in communicating with children, a variety of speech formulas (farewells, greetings, thanks) should be used.

    Do not forget to greet the child in the morning, and in the evening wish him "good night." Speak these words with a smile, in a friendly tone, and accompany them with a tactile touch. Be sure, at least for a small service rendered by a child, do not forget to thank him.

    Remember you need to adequately respond to the misconduct of children: ask the child about what happened, try to delve into his experiences, find out what was the motive for his actions, and understand him; Don't compare your child to other children.

    Bibliography

    1. Fopel K. How to teach children to cooperate? Psychological games and exercises. Moscow: Genesis 2012

    2.Kadyuson H., Schiffer Ch. Workshop on play psychotherapy.- St. Petersburg: Peter, 2013

    3. Preventive program "Crossroads". Eagle 2012

    Plan of individual correctional work

    with the child on the formation

    non-conflict communication skills.

    Target: creation of conditions for the formation of conflict-free communication of a child of preschool age.

    Tasks:

    Development of communication skills

    Help identify your feelings and realize the consequences of your actions in a given situation

    Correction of the emotional-volitional sphere

    Function:

    Corrective, developmental

    Implementation form:

    individual lessons 5-7 years

    Lesson 1.

    Target: diagnosis of negative manifestations

    Conversation with a child. Method "Cacti".

    "Go on….."

    My family is...

    I love it when our family...

    My mom says that I...

    If I do something wrong, then...

    If they hit me, I...

    "Call names"

    Acquaintance with game techniques that promote relaxation in an acceptable form.

    An adult and a child pass the ball to each other, while calling each other all sorts of harmless words. These can be the names of trees, mushrooms, fish, etc.

    Each appeal should begin with the words: “And you ...!”

    "My offenders"

    The child is invited to draw on a piece of paper what or who has ever offended the child, and to whom he would like to take revenge. It is proposed to dress their offenders in funny clothes, to finish them with attributes, or an element, a situation in which they would look funny.

    Discharge, positive emotions.

    knocking with the right hand

    2 - at the level of the head,

    3-4 - at waist level, lean forward and say five times:

    "Hee!", then back and five times:

    "Ha!".

    Speeding up the pace, do this five times, then 4, 3, 2 and 1.

    Lesson 2.

    Greeting "Hello!"

    Say the word "Hello" in different intonations: severely, offended, cheerfully, politely.

    Exercise "Lines"

    Purpose: training in expressing one's emotions in a symbolic, figurative form.

    On a sheet of paper with a pencil, let's try to convey various feelings without drawing anything specific - just simple lines:

    1.happy line

    2.fun line

    3.sad line

    4.evil line

    5.tired line

    6.alarm line

    7. touchy line

    8.kind line

    Exercise "Fighting with hands"

    Purpose: Removal of muscle clamps.

    The child and the adult stand opposite each other, stretching their arms forward, connect them. At the expense of 1,2,3 they rest with their palms so as to push their opponent from their place.

    Exercise "Blanket"

    The blanket fluffs up and sits on a chair:

    Imagine this...

    You can do something with...

    The child can wrinkle, beat, turn over the blanket, etc.

    Mood drawing.

    Show your mood with facial expressions and gestures.

    Lesson 3.

    Greetings. Exercise "Your Name"

    Adult and child say their names. The task of each is to name as many variants of the name of the other as possible.

    Method "My Universe"

    My favourite hobby

    My favorite color

    My favorite animal

    My favorite season

    My favorite fairy tale character

    My friend

    "Writing Fairy Tales"

    The beginning of fairy tales is proposed, come up with a continuation.

    "Mood Drawing"

    Lesson 4.

    Greetings.

    "Quality Names". Creating a friendly atmosphere.

    "Terrible-beautiful drawing."

    An adult and a child each have a sheet of paper and a felt-tip pen.

    First you need to draw a "beautiful drawing."

    Then the adult and the child exchange drawings, each of the received drawing makes "terrible". Then they exchange again and make “beautiful”.

    Discussion.

    The game "Go-you-spirit!"

    Goal: remove negative moods.

    The child walks around the room. Then he stops in front of an adult and says angrily three times: “Tuh-you-spirit!”

    "Mirror"

    "Mood Drawing"

    Lesson 5.

    Greetings.

    Relaxation exercise. Performed in pairs.

    One of the participants conceives a simple drawing, number, letter and draws a finger on the back of another.

    The task of the second is to guess "written".

    The game "Talking things".

    Development of creative activity, empathy.

    Toothbrush, comb, coat

    Shoes, closet, mirror

    Bicycle, radio, textbook.

    Draw three pictures of these objects. Then make up a story.

    Game "I'm Polite"

    Mood drawing.

    Lesson 6.

    Greetings.

    Game "Shield of Wrath"

    The child draws "anger". Then there is a discussion: about an alternative to this feeling, how a person looks and says in a fit of anger. Then the child draws, remakes something in this drawing in order to turn it into kind and funny.

    Show your mood.

    Lesson 7.

    Greetings.

    The game "In the Far Far Away Kingdom"

    Purpose: the formation of a sense of empathy, the establishment of mutual understanding.

    An adult and a child read a fairy tale. Then they draw, depicting the heroes and the memorable event. The child is then asked to place himself in the drawing where he would like to be. Then we ask questions:

    What would you do if you were a hero?

    And what would the hero answer if he asked

    What would you feel if the hero of a fairy tale appeared here

    Game "Gifts"

    The child lists the people he loves, who he likes, and what he would give this person.

    Lesson 8.

    Greetings.

    "Silver Hoof"

    Removing muscle tension, the emergence of confidence in others.

    “Imagine that you are a beautiful, slender, strong, wise deer with your head held high. On your left leg is a silver hoof. As soon as you hit the ground with your hoof three times, silver coins will appear. They are magical and invisible. With each new appearance you become kinder and more affectionate. And although people do not see these coins, they feel the kindness, warmth, affection emanating from you, they are drawn to you, they love you, they like you more and more.

    "Palm"

    Farewell ritual.

    on the formation of communication skills.

    Changing the behavior of an adult and his attitude towards a child

    Build relationships with your child on mutual understanding and trust

    Control the behavior of the child without imposing strict rules on him

    Avoid, on the one hand, excessive softness, and on the other, excessive demands on the child

    Do not give your child categorical instructions, avoid the words “no” and “no”

    Repeat your request with the same words many times

    Use visual stimulation to reinforce verbal instructions

    Remember that excessive talkativeness, mobility and indiscipline of the child are not intentional.

    Listen to what the child has to say

    Do not insist that the child must apologize for the act

    Changing the psychological microclimate in the family

    Give your child enough attention

    Spend leisure time with the whole family

    Don't fight in front of your child

    Organization of the daily routine and place for classes

    Set a solid daily routine for the child and all family members

    Reduce distractions while your child is on a task

    Avoid large crowds as much as possible

    Remember that overwork contributes to a decrease in self-control and an increase in hyperactivity.

    Special Behavior Program

    Do not resort to physical punishment! If there is a need to resort to punishment, then it is advisable to use sitting in a certain place after the act

    Praise your child more often. The threshold for sensitivity to negative stimuli is very low, so childrendo not accept reprimands and punishments, but are sensitive to rewards

    Gradually expand the responsibilities, having previously discussed them with the child

    Do not allow the task to be postponed until another time

    Do not give your child instructions that do not correspond to his level of development, age and abilities.

    Help your child get started on the task, as this is the most difficult stage.

    Do not give multiple directions at the same time. The task that is given to the child should not have complex instructions and consist of several links.

    Remember that for a childthe most effective will be the means of persuasion "through the body"

    Deprivation of pleasure, treats, privileges

    Prohibition of pleasurable activities, walks, etc.

    Reception "off time" (early going to bed)

    Remember that after punishment, positive emotional reinforcement, signs of "acceptance" are needed. In the correction of the child's behavior, the technique of the "positive model" plays an important role, which consists in the constant encouragement of the desired behavior of the child and ignoring the undesirable.

    Parental love will help the child cope with any difficulties.

    Process Behavior communication with children

    Remember You need to let your child know that you accept him the way he is. Try to use such expressions: “You are the most beloved”, “We love, understand, hope for you”, “I love you any”, “What a happiness that we have you”.

    Remember that your every word, facial expressions, gestures, intonation, volume of voice carry a message to the child about his value. Strive to create high self-esteem in your child, reinforcing this with the words: "I rejoice at your success", "You can do a lot."

    Remember that parents who say one thing and do another are eventually disrespected by their children.

    Remember before you begin to communicate with your child, you need to take a position so that you can see his eyes. In most cases, you will have to squat down.

    Remember that you need to express your attitude to the behavior of the child without unnecessary explanations and moralizing. Choose the correct, timely appeal to him, for example: "Sasha, Sashenka, son, son ...".

    Remember that it is necessary to show full interest in the child in the process of communication. Emphasize this with a nod, exclamations. Don't get distracted while listening to it. Concentrate all your attention on it. Give him time to speak, do not rush him and do not emphasize with your appearance that this is no longer interesting to you.

    Remember that many of the attitudes they receive from you determine their behavior in the future. Don't tell your child what you don't really want him to do.

    Remember that in communicating with children, a variety of speech formulas (farewells, greetings, thanks) should be used.

    Do not forget to greet the child in the morning, and in the evening wish him "good night." Speak these words with a smile, in a friendly tone, and accompany them with a tactile touch. Be sure, at least for a small service rendered by a child, do not forget to thank him.

    Remember you need to adequately respond to the misconduct of children: ask the child about what happened, try to delve into his experiences, find out what was the motive for his actions, and understand him; Don't compare your child to other children.

    Bibliography

    1. Fopel K. How to teach children to cooperate? Psychological games and exercises. Moscow: Genesis 2012

    2.Kadyuson H., Schiffer Ch. Workshop on play psychotherapy.- St. Petersburg: Peter, 2013

    3. Preventive program "Crossroads". Eagle 2012