Funny and funny toasts. Short funny toasts

It's okay that a birthday only happens once a year. With our toasts, you can decorate any feast and create a holiday almost every day. There is always a reason to have fun. And with the help of a variety of toasts for every taste, you can create festive atmosphere and give everyone present a wonderful mood.

If you do not have enough imagination to come up with an original and funny congratulation on your own, do not despair! With our selection you will become famous merry fellow and cheerleader. In this article, we have collected for you toasts for a birthday, or any other holiday, that you can choose for a man and a woman for any feast:

• Short;
• In verse;
• funny;
• Cool;
• Vulgar.

Happy birthday dear!

I wish you dough and more fools

To get rid of the shackles

Our life is difficult.

Fur coats, clubs, diamonds

And champagne by the river

To pour from the tap.

Didn't get up from the sofa.

Chocolates, marmalades

For breakfast and lunch.

All whims were fulfilled

And you didn't hear it.

For you my friend!

We drink martinis, where is the mug?

Pour it, my old lady!

One day a girl was walking through the desert with a bottle of drink.. And he sees in front of him a weakened guy who was almost at death's door. He was thirsty. In a weak, barely audible voice, he asked the woman for a drink, but she refused him. The girl wanders further and here is an oasis in front of her. She is very happy, splashing in the water, bathing. And then she remembers the poor guy she met along the way. The girl took some water for him and decided to give him a drink, she returns to the place where she met him, but he has already given up ... So let's drink to the fact that women and girls always give on time! This applies to the birthday girl as well. For you, friend!

A beautiful and slender, absolutely naked woman is walking through the desert and meets a handsome young man. He is also naked, but the male genitals are covered with a hat. The woman wanted to see everything without a hat, came close to the guy and quickly removed her two hands. But the hat kept hanging. So let's drink to the indescribable beauty of a girl, which gives strength to hold the hat!

You are beautiful like a lama.

Graceful as a pava.

Appetizing like a bun

And smell like Chanel.

You demolish the tower worse than alcohol

I want to flirt with you.

Overhaul in your bed

Set up for a few weeks.

For you, my dear!

I myself drink and pour,

Raise this toast

And I stand up to my full height.

Happy birthday!

If you have small troubles in your life, be ironic. If there are huge troubles - laugh heartily. If they ask about your age - shamelessly lie! Happy holiday, girlfriend, you have become another year older! Happy birthday!

So that you are not jinxed,

So that you don't get off,

So that you always have something to wear

And there was always someone to get naked in front of!

Let's raise our faceted glasses so that the birthday girl has as much grief in her life as there is liquid left in our containers!

I wish you a lot of luck and a cottage by the sea. Happiness, health and all blah blah blah. Such are the things...

Let's drink to ensure that your desires about horseradish fell from my capabilities.

Girlish melodrama: “I didn’t have time to look back, as they stopped looking back.” Let's raise a glass to those who don't look back. For you, newborn!

Vulgar toasts for a cheerful company

And to put you in to jail for 100 years for the brutal rape of a young wife!

I want to get drunk for "ELK"!

To want

Fuck * ELK and live!

Let's raise our stacks for the ladies! After all, “I won’t give” is a bad phrase!

Let everything pass by you, of course, except for intimacy!

For the men! The women drink on their knees ... with the men!

A stray dog ​​is walking down the street, and a well-groomed lap dog is running towards him. -Hey! Who are you?” the dog asked. - I'm a beautiful lapdog. - She answered playfully. - And I just decided to pee ... I'll make a simple toast, like this stray dog. To always stand ... stopar and loot has always been found!

Funny birthday toasts for a man

Man like good wine: every year makes him better, wiser. And let's drink to healthier, more profitable and more successful!

Only heard on every corner: a man must do this, a man must do this ... Enough! Today you, my friend, should only one thing - to be happy! After all, the birthday, as the crocodile Gena sang in one children's song, is only once a year! So have fun and don't worry about debt!

You're tough like Bruce Willis. Handsome like Brad Pitt. Strong like Schwarzenegger. Gentle, like Dima Bilan. So let's drink to your split personality!

Guys are like little kids, honestly! They always need new beautiful cars and a lot to have their own airplanes and other toys. So let's drink to our stronger sex and their addictions, and so that they always have pretty dolls in their cars!

We always drink on days starting with the letter "C": on Wednesdays, Saturdays and today!

Once upon a time there was a very unhappy guy in this world. He did not see happiness, did not laugh and did not even smile. Everything about him was very bad. And so it went from day to day, from month to month, from year to year. But suddenly, one day, a miracle happened! Lady Fate herself appeared to him and offered one of the three royal gifts. She offered to choose between Love, Luck and Health. so let's raise our cups for our dear friend never had to choose and all three of these gifts were present in the life of our birthday boy in abundance!

Cool short toasts

I am not a thirty-year-old lady, but a young 17-year-old girl with 13 years of experience!

The only wife - all right, a mistress - not bad. Two mistresses - perhaps, but several spouses - too much! Let's raise our glasses to a sense of proportion!

Such a treasure ideal woman impossible to find, it can only be created with your own hands, overwork, sweat and blood. So let's drink to the men who work tirelessly around the clock!

The girl is ready for absolutely anything for the sake of feeling love - and even make love. The guy is ready for a lot for the sake of just making love - and even falling in love. So let's drink to a wonderful and bright feeling!

Expensive! Alcohol makes you just gorgeous! But I didn't use it! - That's not the point, I used it! So let's raise our cups for female attractiveness!

Cool toasts in verse

To always stand with us

And you had ** yes.

To break the bed

The parties didn't end.

Let's drink to the girls!

So many bows, skirts.

Tights, ruffles, thongs, bodices

And so many go around myths!

There are many of them - all sorts of simpletons,

Aristocrats, po * yadushki,

Their legs will grow from their ears,

And we kiss them, Ukrainians.

They are so passionate and hot

And they love veal tenderness.

We drink vodka slowly

Girls, let your life be

Fresh, cute and good!

This toast is a little simple,

But the feelings are immeasurable in him.

Pour the third toast

And we drink to our girls!

As they say, the strong sex is weaker than the weak, due to the weakness of the stronger sex to the weak. How twisted! Let's drain our cups to the bottom!

Attention, only TODAY!

A funny toast is always welcome: it could be a birthday loved one, anniversary, corporate party or just gatherings of a friendly company. Cool humorous congratulations or the statement will be remembered by all guests. This collection contains both short and long toasts that will make your holiday more fun.

A wealthy businessman decided to get married and turned to a marriage office to find a lady from high society for him.
- Beautiful, naturally? the marriage agent asked.
- Certainly. Such that it could be said about her that she seemed to have stepped out of the picture, - the businessman clarified his desire.
After the bureau arranged a meeting for him, he burst into the marriage office, salivating in indignation:
- I asked you: beautiful, as in the picture. And who are you palming off on me: ears like burdocks, nose climbs on my lip, eyes are slanted.
“Sir, don’t make such a noise,” one of the agents said to him. - It's a matter of taste. Who likes Raphael, and who is crazy about Picasso.
So let's drink to the variety of tastes that are not disputed.

A turtle floats down the river with a snake sitting on its back.
The snake thinks
- Bite - throw off!
Turtle thinks:
- I'll drop it - it will bite!
So let's drink to the right female friendship which helps to overcome all obstacles!

Rural yard. In the corner, a rooster is actively caring for a hen. And at this time, a Georgian comes out onto the porch. He has a bag of seeds in his hand, which he nibbles lazily. Then he picks up a handful and throws it on the ground. The rooster, noticing the seeds, leaves his girlfriend and begins to peck them. The Georgian, seeing this scene, sadly shook his head: “God forbid you get so hungry!”
I suggest drinking to abundance!

- Stop being picky! a wife says to her husband at dinner. - On Monday you ate pea puree at dinner, on Tuesday and Wednesday - too, on Thursday you agreed, and today you suddenly became capricious.
Let's drink to the fact that our hostesses feed us not only with pea puree, but also with the same dishes that decorate this table now!

One no longer young woman was asked if she remembered her first man. “A man - I don’t remember when - I don’t remember, but I remember that ... a charmer!”. Let's drink to the fact that all our men, regardless of the name and other circumstances, were just a charmer!

The lover brings three tickets to the cinema.
Why three? – surprised girlfriend.
- What do you mean why? For your mother, for your father and for your brother.
Let's drink to the ability of men to achieve solitude!

The excavator Masha dug a ditch and dug up the tomb of the Egyptian pharaoh. The lid of the sarcophagus moved, and Masha saw a handsome young prince. He was like alive. Masha could not stand it and kissed the prince. And a miracle happened - the prince came to life. - How can I thank you, Masha? asked the young pharaoh. - Do you want me to fulfill any of your seven desires? “I don’t need seven wishes,” Masha said, one wish is better, but seven times ... Pharaoh agreed, but died on the fifth run. So let's drink to the excavator Masha, who did not allow the slave system to revive!

Two friends meet.
Are you happy with your husband? one of them asks.
- I'm so happy ... We love each other so much that we have already postponed the divorce several times ...
Let's drink to strong love!

A woman was created to make a man happy, no matter where this unfortunate man hides. So let's drink to the fact that our happiness always finds us!

Women gathered for the International Congress. For three days they talked and talked, without any agenda, quarreled, argued ... Finally, they decided:
1. All men are bastards.
2. There is not enough space in the closet.
3. There is absolutely nothing to wear.
Let's drink to the fact that our women never come to such conclusions.

There is a mountain of love in Asia. Many legends are associated with it. Here, listen to one of them. Once a young shepherd and a princess fell in love and ran away from home. They immediately followed them in pursuit. The lovers climbed this mountain. They were about to be overtaken. And then the young man said to the princess: "Let me jump first, and then you decide what to do next." But the princess refused, because she could not endure such torment. And she was the first to rush down and, of course, crashed. The shepherd looked at her lifeless body and just went down the mountain of Love. So let's drink to the men who are still the first to get out of the elevator!

In one of the courts, the case of the victim was heard.
“Are you saying that the defendant took the money right out of your bra?” the judge asked.
“Yes, Your Honor,” the victim replied.
"So why didn't you resist?" the judge was surprised.
“I thought he had good intentions,” the frustrated girl shrugged her shoulders!
So let's drink to men with good intentions!

I propose a toast to the greens! Do you think this toast is dedicated to frogs? No! And not Greenpeace! I want to drink this glass for the fact that we have many, many green ones! In short, for bucks, which would be cramped in our pockets and we kept them in big, big bags in the cellar and ... But something I was completely daydreaming, blabbed, because it was high time to drink! For the green!

Selling at the kiosk Greeting Cards with the inscription: "My only, beloved for life." A young man came up:
– Give me, please, a dozen of these postcards.
So let's drink to a kind of male logic!

To show that he does not squander budget resources, the mayor put a gas bottle on his Lamborghini. So let's drink for reasonable savings!

An old woman goes to the next world and thinks where to go: to heaven or to hell? “Of course, it’s good in heaven, the climate, but in hell there is society, men, again.” As you understand good society reconcile with the inconveniences of life.
Let's drink to the pleasant company of pleasant men!

A man in Odessa slows down a taxi and asks to be taken to Lozinskaya. Sits down. A sharp start, then drive a little and stop abruptly. The driver opens the door: "Lozinskaya!". The man is at a loss: “Why didn’t you say it right away?”. The driver explains: "And I thought you want to be chic."
Let's drink to men who like to do everything with style!

One day Alyonushka and her brother Ivanushka were walking through the forest. Ivanushka wanted to drink some water, he looks - traces of hooves on the ground, and there is water in them.
“I’ll drink from a horse’s hoof,” says Ivanushka.
“Don’t drink,” Alyonushka replies, “you will become a foal.”
“I’ll drink from a cow’s hoof,” Ivanushka insists.
“Don’t drink,” Alyonushka replies, “you will become a calf.”
“I’ll drink from a goat’s hoof,” Ivanushka insisted.
“Don’t drink,” Alyonushka replies, “you will become a kid.”
Ivanushka did not obey, he drank enough from the hooves, and did not turn into anyone. Only then he toiled with his stomach for a week. So let's drink to never get drunk to the point of losing human form!

Men who send only air kisses, ladies, are considered lazy people who shirk real work. So let's drink to men who are not afraid of any work!

I was walking one night in the park: the moon, the stars, and a guy and a girl were kissing on a bench. I go another time: the moon, the stars ... and the same guy on the same bench kisses another girl. I go next time: night, moon, stars... and the same guy, on the same bench with a third girl.
So let's drink to the constancy of men and the inconstancy of women!

The student goes to the exam. He thinks: “I will hand over - I will get drunk, I will not hand over - I will get drunk.” Bought a bottle. I put it in my jacket pocket and went to surrender. He pulled out a ticket ... Teacher:
- What's in your pocket?
- Yes, nothing.
- No, no, no! Get it.
The student takes out a bottle, the teacher - a glass. He pours himself and drinks in one gulp:
- Fine. Pickle There is?
- No.
- It's a pity. Or it could be “excellent,” the teacher fills in the record book.
Let's drink to the right approach!

Two friends met
- Are you so upset?
one asks.
- Yes, Larisa from the house management said that I was a fool.
“Never mind,” her friend soothes, “you found someone to listen to, Lariska!” She has no opinion at all, she only repeats what everyone around her is saying!
Let's drink to sensitive friends who know how to calm down!

Are you wondering how a wife keeps her husband? Georgian - patience, Negro - skill, Greek - beauty, Armenian - food, French - figure, American - deeds, Italian - luxury, Jewish - cry, Japanese - grace, Russian - court.
So let's drink to us, to the Russian peasants, who now, in the era of democracy, cannot be held back by anything!

Somehow three wizards argued who would fly around the world faster than others. He waved one hand, hit his forehead on the ground, turned into a hawk and flew forward. Another wizard waved his hand, hit his forehead on the ground, turned into a falcon and rushed after him. A third waved his hand, hit his forehead on the ground, received a concussion and a closed fracture of the base of the skull. So let's drink to always soberly assess our capabilities!

A man is sitting in a boat in the middle of the lake, fishing. He sits for a long time ... Does not peck.
“God,” the peasant pleaded, “send me at least one big fish!”
Tiger shark emerges:
- Well…?
So let's drink to a well-composed technical task!

When asked who you like more - blondes or brunettes, a real man should answer:
- Yes!
So let's drink to real men!

The teacher asks the student:
- If you have 10 thousand rubles in one pocket and 20 thousand rubles in the other, what does this mean?
The student answers without hesitation:
"That means I'm wearing someone else's pants!"
Let's drink to having money in every pocket! And there was money on the book! And so that we live happily ever after!

The distribution of men and women should take place according to this principle: each according to his abilities, each according to his work. Let's not drink to our capable women. Let's drink to the workaholic men!

What is the difference between a faithful and an unfaithful man? Huge. The faithful sometimes have pangs of conscience. So let's drink to the fact that remorse of conscience does not torment faithful husbands!

All are women, and we are goddesses,
And the size of our bodies is not important.
Let those cry who we did not get
Let those who did not want us die!

Dear my friends! I want to raise a toast to our men, to those who are always there! R-I-D-O-M, I said!

She was walking down the street when she heard footsteps behind her. Looking back, she saw handsome guy. She looked back and he continued to follow her. I decided to get to know him, looked back for the third time - he was no longer there ...
So let's drink to ensure that sewer manholes are closed in time in the city!

So that you have as many enemies as there are drops left in a glass drunk to the bottom. So that you survive all the horrors of the captured beast, the train wreck, the torture of racketeers, the torment of a convict sentenced to the tower, but only from the TV screen that you won in the Field of Miracles. So that one day a bee stings you, and in surprise you jump so high that you set a new world record. So that in the apartment where you had a conversation with charming woman tete-a-tete, suddenly the lights went out and you finally found mutual language. So that a barabashka settles in your odnushka, and for his tricks you are moved into a comfortable 3-room apartment. So that you in new year's eve when everyone is celebrating, they sent you to dig a hole until the morning, in which you will find a treasure!

A ram stands by the river bank and looks. Suddenly a luxury car pulls up, and out of it amazing woman. The ram stands and looks.
The beauty undresses, the ram stands and looks.
A woman is bathing - a ram is watching.
The beauty comes out of the water - the ram is watching, the woman is dressing - the ram is watching. She is leaving. Baran continues to watch.
Let's drink so that our men do not become like such sheep!

Dinosaurs - he and she - look at each other. He tenderly to her: “UuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuumuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuguuuuUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHB She objects: "N-uh-uh!" And so it went on for many years. He couldn't resist:
- Du-r-a-a, so we will die out!
And they've died out! So let's drink for a beautiful treatment, mutual attraction and for childbearing!

Suddenly, the husband returns from a business trip, knocks on the door - they don’t open it, knocks again - they don’t open it, knocks on the third - the wife opens the door, happily throws herself on his neck and says:
- Dear, how glad I am that you finally arrived, otherwise I was waiting for you only tomorrow!
And that's it. Five or six years pass, one day the husband will embrace his wife and say:
- Kitten, remember, once, long ago, I returned from a business trip, knocking on the door - and you still didn’t open it, what were you doing there?
The wife jumps up and shouts:
- Oh my God! Oh my God!
Opens the closet door - a skeleton falls out. So let's drink, gentlemen, so that our beloved women remember us more often!

Do you know how a fairy tale differs from what it was? A fairy tale is when he married a frog, and she turned out to be a princess. A true story is when the opposite is true.
So let's drink to make our life look like a fairy tale.

A wise man once said, "Don't be so dry as to break. But don't be so wet that they squeeze you out like a rag." Let's drink to the fact that in our festive sky there will be partly cloudy, but without precipitation, with an air temperature of about zero and a temperature of bottled water from 30 to 40 degrees!

Friends! Let's drink to our enemies. So that they have everything: a country villa, a luxury car in the garage, Persian carpets, a swimming pool, a fireplace, and of course, a satellite phone that they would only call on 01, 02 and 03!

Through the desert a man is walking who is just dying of thirst. A man stands in his way and sells ties:
- Buy a tie!
“Why do I need a tie, I would buy at least a sip of water from you.”
And he went on. He walked for a long time, suddenly on his way there is a restaurant. A man, not feeling his legs under him, rushes to this restaurant, and a sign hangs on its doors: "Entrance is prohibited without a tie."
I want to drink for prudent men!

Who loves the dark moon
Who is an outsider's wife,
Who to speak, who to listen.
But who, referring to the whole world,
Don't like good food?
For dear hostess!

Three poplars met at Plyushchikha: poplar, Eduard Topol and the Topol M installation.
One showered everyone with his sticky fluff, another began to pour unconventional vocabulary, and the third threatened that he would deal a crushing blow if the first two did not stop quarreling.
I propose to drink for the ability to conduct a constructive conversation and find a common language!

A husband and wife standing at the window are talking:
- You see, what a caring husband someone has - he even removes linen from the rope, - says the wife.
“The caring one is caring, and, by the way, he takes off our underwear,” the husband answers.
So let's drink to attentive husbands!

Once, on a fast night train from Milan to Rome, a nice Italian woman and a young American were in the same compartment. Beatiful lady suggested young man to pass the time on the road, to tell interesting stories. Since it was her suggestion, she naturally told the first story.
Here she is. Long ago, on a stormy rainy night, a young maiden knocked at the door of a hermit. She was beautiful, all in white, and the hermit gave her his meager cell, and he himself went to spend the night in a closet.
After a while, a knock was heard at the hermit's gate, and a handsome young knight asked the hermit for shelter. The hermit said to him:
“I am poor and sir, and in my only cell is a young maiden. You can share a room with her or spend the night in a stable with a donkey.”
To this the knight replied: "I am a knight!" - and stayed overnight in a barn.
The night has passed. The knight asked the hermit for food in the morning. The hermit chuckled: “Sir, you are an ass! Eat oats."
This story seemed funny to the young American, he told the beautiful signora a lot of others. interesting stories and jokes, and she told him.
The road flew by quickly, and when the train arrived in Rome in the morning, the signora gave the young man a small silver dollar. The American was surprised and asked: “Why?”, And the beauty laughed sincerely: “Buy oats for this dollar.”
So let's drink to the fact that we will never be given a small silver dollar!

One day a man found a lamp in the desert and rubbed it. A genie flew out of the lamp:
- I am a powerful genie, and I will fulfill any three of your wishes!
- Fine. I want a lot of money!
No sooner said than done. The genie hands the man a credit card.
- I want a huge house with a harem, where there are a lot of women!
And the genie did it. He holds out the keys to the house.
“I want three more wishes!”
- Hey man, no. I can't do this. According to tradition, one genie can only grant three wishes.
“Okay, then I want three more gins!”
We wish our birthday boy to find more genies to help him!

Judge:
- Defendant, explain to the court why you robbed the same store three times in a row?
Defendant:
“You see, Citizen Judge, the first time I took my wife’s dress there, and then she forced me to change it several more times!
Let's drink to the perseverance of our wives!

It is said that when God molded people out of clay, he had many spare parts left. In one corner lay long legs, short skirt and flapping eyelashes. When God turned away, they all giggled and ran off to drink coffee - so the secretaries appeared.
In another corner lay a tie, a cell phone, a formal suit and a briefcase. When God was distracted, the suit tied a tie, took a diplomat, talked on the phone, boomed: "I'll be there soon," and left in an unknown direction. This is how bosses came into being. And in the third corner was a big pile of brains, a lot of hair and jeans. When God left for lunch, all this got up and wandered thoughtfully to the nearest computer - this is how programmers appeared.
So let's drink to our hero of the day, a representative of the most intellectual profession!

Some joker got under New Year fur coat and beard of Santa Claus. He dressed up and, rejoicing that he could amuse his wife, rang the doorbell of his apartment. The wife opened it and, before he could utter a word, threw herself on his neck, began to kiss him passionately and carried him into the bedroom. And there, like crazy, she indulged in passionate love with "Santa Claus". Taking advantage of a short respite, the husband threw off the fake beard and mustache. And then he heard his wife's voice:
- Well, it's you! I didn't recognize you at all!
So let's raise a toast to real men who know how to arrange a holiday for their wife!

One physician explained to his beloved this way: “The ulcer of my heart, you inflicted a deep wound on my soul, your radiant eyes burned through my essence. My mind is weakening, like a stomach from a double dose of a laxative. Have pity on me, be a plaster of my soul and a balm of suffering. Dear women, be the patches of our souls and the balm of suffering!

The inscription on the bottle of cognac "Otard" reads:
“Baron Otard fought a lot, but was completely ruined. And with the last money he bought a castle and organized cognac production.
SO LET WE HAVE SO MUCH LAST MONEY!

If the mountain does not go to Mohammed, then Mohammed goes to the mountain. If the man you like doesn't notice you, borrow a lot of money from him so that he only thinks about you. And we will drink for generous men!

Grandmother teaches her granddaughter:
Every girl should have only one in her life. big love.
Granddaughter is interested in:
- And how, did you have a great love?
- Certainly. All my life I loved the military.
For the only love in life!

To kill you ... at the age of 150, a young jealous man, and jealousy was not in vain!

Let's drink to
So that everything is always lucky,
So that we have millions
And so that in the morning we do not get sick.

To drink vodka and not get drunk,
To regret nothing
To fulfill all desires
And never lose heart!

The son, father and grandfather went fishing somehow. They were riding in a bus, then a girl comes in, all dressed up, and pantyhose in a fishnet.
Son thought:
- Honorable chick...
Father thinks:
- Probably, all the money from the parents for clothes pulls ...
Grandpa's thoughts:
- Oh, but the networks forgot ...
Let's drink to clarity of thought!

For character and fashion
For wonderful weather
For a salary, for good,
And for a stylish coat.

For prosperity, and for the house,
For the comfort that reigned in him,
For a hangover, and for
To be good!

In general, we must drink,
For success and dreams
For delight and beauty
For love and family!

Let's drink with you for "cabbage",
To always be thick
To be carried in a wallet,
In euro, pound, dollar!

Let's also drink to
For everything to be fine
Vacation abroad
And problems not to know.

Eat black caviar
With a sandwich in the morning
Driving around in a Jaguar
Take a seat in the Duma!

Let it be easy on the soul
It's very hard in pockets.
To drink calmly, eat,
I had the courage to admit everything.
To have the strength to have fun
I couldn't sleep for joy.
Let everything be done
And don't even sweat.
Let life rush somersault
And we are in life - like riding!

Let's drink to years
So that they do not live in vain,
So that there are many events
And amazing discoveries!

Let's drink vodka
To never end
To always, at any time,
Her friends could buy!

Let's drink to a hangover
To never hurt them
After all, this is a skill
So that your head does not hurt!

Let's have a last drink
For our plans and dreams
To have many deals
To have us could not!

Let's drink to hell
We know him, we all need him,
He knows everything, about everyone, always,
And sometimes things go with him!

It's more interesting to talk with him
And build a fence with it
With him, jelly is always tastier,
It will never disappear!

Late evening. The wife glances anxiously at her watch. Finally, the husband comes home and asks loudly from the threshold:
- Dear, remember, I once promised to get a star?
- I remember. And what?
- Get out the glasses, I brought five stars ... on a cognac bottle!
Let's drink for male generosity and female patience!

They say that people don't always need advice, sometimes they just need a friendly helping hand. Sometimes you need an ear to listen to problems and hardships, and sometimes a heart that understands and appreciates. So let's drink to all the other organs that are sometimes so needed. For example, for a friendly leg, which at the right time will give a good kick so that we can move on!

Friends, let's drink and pour more! After all, as one wise granny used to say, it’s better to shoot and reload and shoot again than to shine a flashlight and ask: “Who is here?”

***
I propose to drink to the health of those who still have it.

***
For those saints and gods who patronize us!
For the victory of all victories - for the victory over yourself!

***
May your years be long, but never seem so to you!

***
They say that a losing streak sometimes turns out to be a take-off.
So let's drink to our joyful prospects on the runway!

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There are two ways to drink: drink thinking and drink without thinking. Let's drink without hesitation!

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Wine in a glass should be drunk while it plays.
As long as one lives, one must live, there are no two lives...

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Let's drink to those men who have ... a full glass of wine, and to those women who give men ... to drink this glass!

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I propose to drink for the most gentle, the most charming, the most affectionate, the most patient! For us men!

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They don't drink for happiness - they fight for it
They don’t drink for health - they pray for it
They don't drink for love - they do it
Let's drink to dreams - let them come true!

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Let's drink to the fact that the tables burst with abundance, and the beds - with love!

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I'll finish my drink now, madam, and I'm at your feet.

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We are born with a cry, and we die with a groan.
So let's drink to the fact that our life will pass with laughter!

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Let's drink to die peacefully, in a dream, like my grandfather, and not in fear and with screams of horror ... like his passengers!

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I have one weakness: I can’t help drinking women at the table!

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Let's move our glasses together, raise them at once, long live the muses, long live the mind!

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I wish you a lot of money, a lot of love and a lot of time to enjoy it!

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Let those who did not get us cry, let those who did not want us die.

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When you drink, you need to know the measure. Otherwise, you can drink less.
So let's drink one more, in order to get closer to the indicated measure as soon as possible!

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Let's drink to those who speak well of us even without us!

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Life is a short child's shirt, all crap. Let's drink to the days when we manage to wash it.

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Life is in a hurry, but we are all slow, and therefore ... glasses up! For the joy of life!

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Everything we do with our hands is bad, so let's drink to the children!

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To eat and drink, To want and be able, To everyone and everywhere Be with someone and be where!

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While cleaning the room, the servant found a ruble and gave it to the owner.
“Since you are so honest,” he said, “keep this ruble for yourself.
A few days later the owner lost the golden pencil and asked the servant if he had found it in the room.
- I found it, - the servant answered, - but I kept it to myself for honesty.
I raise my glass to the honest and truthful!

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I wish you a lot of money, a lot of love and a lot of time to enjoy it!

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Let's drink to something thanks to which, no matter what!

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I love salad I love potatoes, let's drink a little!

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Let's drink to the slow flow of fast-flowing life!

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Let's drink to those men who can stand up for themselves and lie down for others!

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Let the life-giving moisture spill over the bodily periphery. Amen.

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Vodka is our enemy - it must be destroyed!!!
Let's drink to victory!

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Bottles on the table, herring on the table. Why don't we wave a stack for a snack?

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Let's drink for your desires to be stunned by your capabilities!

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Let's raise our glasses and put them on the floor. Now let's raise it again and drink to sex life!

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Children are flowers of life. So let's give these flowers to beautiful girls!

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Sea toast: Let's drink the battleship, but we won't disgrace the fleet!

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Feel all the desires of the soul,
To be inspired to meet your dream!

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Awl-soap-reel, we drink to get lucky!

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Linden trees bloom in the park - this is an occasion to drink

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He said let's go and drank some water!...

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To have something to wear and in front of whom to undress!

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Friends! Let's drink to our enemies. So that they have everything: a country villa, a luxury car in the garage, Persian carpets, a swimming pool, a fireplace, and, of course, a satellite phone that they would only call on 01, 02 and 03!!!

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A turtle floats on the river
on her back sits a poisonous snake.
The snake thinks: "I bite - it will drop."
The turtle thinks: "If I drop it, it will bite."
So let's drink to true female friendship,
who can overcome any obstacles!

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Let's drink to ELK!
To want, to be able, to get richer, e#ELOS, - for the moose!

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When asked who you love more - blondes or brunettes, a real man should answer:
- Yes!

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I propose to drink for all men to be like Santa Claus - they showered women with gifts, and in return they asked to tell a rhyme!

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Let's drink to those on board. Who is overboard, he will get drunk !!

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No need to chase a woman like a departed tram. Remember that the next tram is coming from behind.
So let's drink for trams to run more often!

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I drink for the fact that they gave us ...
Awards, orders, medals...
To always rise at the right moment ...
And never went down...
Glass filled with wine!
So let's drink to what you thought about for the first time!

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For strong life- game without rules,
for the weak - watching the game.
For us gamblers!

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Let's drink not for the sake of drunken booze, but in order not to wean

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One traffic police inspector was asked what he dreamed of becoming as a child.
- I always wanted to be a conductor! It did not work out, but the dream of being in the spotlight and waving a wand remained!
Let's drink to the fact that at least partially our dreams come true.

Cool, unexpected and original birthday toasts are always able to cheer up and stir up a bored company. Be positive and then you can gather a lot of well-wishers around you. To be able to congratulate with humor, without hurting anyone's feelings, is akin to art. Check out our collection of toasts. Good advice will surely help you develop own style behavior during the feast and come up with some original personal greetings.

Cool toasts for a woman's birthday

What does a woman want to hear about on her birthday? About your own irresistibility. About how significant she is for others, desirable among men, beautiful and inaccessible.

Let flattering speeches intertwine in an endless stream. Let's put aside modesty and restraint. The birthday girl should feel like the center of attention. When, no matter how on this significant day, can she feel like a queen?

Let your expressions be full of jokes and exaggerations, everything is in place, everything is on the table. Tomorrow the fanfares will subside, and today their rumble should glorify the birthday girl.

Humor helps to present any overblown wish in an acceptable form. And let the congratulatory know that not everything is true, a portion of flattery on her birthday has not yet led anyone away from reality. Be generous. And put in your wishes the maximum of what a woman wants to hear.

1. I raise this toast to your growth in life: so that incomes increase, money sticks by itself, there are more friends and happy days in life!
2. Live in such a way that all envious people turn green, friends admire, colleagues respect, and descendants are proud. Let the greens also be found in the wallet and allow you to live as you want, and not as you have to.
3. I wish to reach the goal faster than the cheetah overtakes its prey. To be calmer than a boa constrictor, slimmer than a fallow deer and more fun than a monkey!
4. Birthdays remind me of bribe-takers on an especially large scale. So accept from me the wishes of great happiness, inexhaustible prosperity and great love!
5. I want all your dreams to stop teasing with unreality and show themselves in action! Let you get everything that gives pleasure and brings profit

Short and funny congratulations for men

On a birthday, a man most often wishes well-being, financial solvency, faithful friend and reliable friends. You can endlessly delve into the reasoning about the mission entrusted to the strong half of humanity to take care of and provide for all their loved ones. And you can say all the most important things in a couple of phrases.

Birthday is not a reason for moralizing. Every man wants to be strong and independent. Is it worth spurring him on once more in his day?