Funny examples of male greed (stories from the forum). Two candies, two cloves. Real stories of male greed

Imagine, girls, my purse was just cut in the subway and my wallet was stolen.

Little of that there were almost a hundred hryvnia in the wallet, and that the bag costs three hundred. “I just recently bought it,” she said in a broken voice and began to cry.
- There is no need to make a problem out of this. According to statistics, every person is robbed at least once in their life. What happened cannot be changed. Therefore, there is no need to cry! - the sensible Irina tried to calm her down.
“But I still need to somehow make it to my salary,” Inga continued to cry. - What should I do?
“I can lend you a hundred hryvnia until salary,” I offered.
- Yes, but I will need to return them, and I wanted to buy myself new sandals.
“Then we’ll have to postpone the purchase,” Irina entered the conversation again.
“You already have so many shoes that you could change them continuously every day for several weeks.”
- So what. I believe that a woman should have a separate pair of shoes for every outfit. Shoes need to be changed not only when the season changes,” Inga said angrily, stopping crying.
“You need to buy things, weighing your income against your expenses,” Irina said instructively. — And don’t make buying junk the meaning of life. In the end, you can turn into a slave to things and think only about rags.
- And if you wear the same things all the time, you can turn into a mothball girl! - Inga retorted.
“Well, of course, it’s easy for you to say, you’re not used to caring about anyone except about yourself,” Irina remarked angrily. “And I have a child, and I still need to help my mother.”
“Girls, stop it,” I intervened in the argument. “It wasn’t enough for you to quarrel.”

Better let's drink coffee, I brought candy too. Want to? Inga left the office, and I reproachfully remarked to Irina that she shouldn’t have upset Inga even more. After all, she was already unlucky today.
- Oh, Natasha, it will be difficult for you to live with such kindness. Only you always try to forgive people for all their shortcomings. Look what a miser she is,” the restrained Vera turned to me.
- Yes, when we indulge in coffee and sweets, she always says that she is losing weight, and coffee harms her diseased liver.
But as soon as something sweet appears, she forgets that she is on a diet, and she drinks coffee along with everyone else. Therefore, you should not protect her and lend money. “Nothing spoils relationships between people more than debts,” Irina continued to be indignant.
“Girls, don’t be so petty.” Don’t forget that she is our youngest and doesn’t understand much in life. “I tried to justify Inga again. - She has everything ahead...
“Yeah, let’s adopt her as a whole team, this baby,” Vera suggested ironically. - Let him live for his own pleasure! It's her birthday soon, by the way.

Let's chip in and buy her new handbag . It can even be made from crocodile skin. Maybe a reminder of such a terrible predator will scare away all sorts of crooks from her.
“Yeah, and when we spend money on a gift for someone else, she always whines that she’s broke.” But at the same time, she buys herself expensive cosmetics,” Irina continued to get angry.
“When Nina Ivanovna needed money for an operation, they gave everything away, but she said that it was a useless waste of money, saying that the operation would not help her. And Nina Ivanovna, thank God, is now alive and well! - Vera reminded.
- There’s no point in talking about this now. This will only spoil our mood. After all, maybe her parents spoiled her. They have it late and only child, I suggested.
- Moreover, when everything is easy for a person, he should just as easily part with some ducats for general needs. “You can’t beg snow from her in winter,” Irina continued to grumble. - Yes, it’s easier for her to shoot herself than to help someone financially, to be generous!
- No, someone, but she will certainly never shoot herself. Because, firstly, it will be a pity to spend money on a gun. And secondly, she simply cannot bear the fact that at the wake people will crack delicacies without her. direct participation“Vera laughed.
“Girls, God knows what we can agree on,” I tried to change the subject. - Let's finally not forget that she has a difficult day today. She was still robbed! I thought that while we were here washing Inga’s bones, she, poor thing, was crying bitterly, all alone, somewhere in the smoking room. So I decided to calm her down a little.

What was my surprise?, when, pushing the door that was not tightly closed, I found her eavesdropping on our conversation! She heard everything. Inga stepped back and silently beckoned me to follow her with her hand. I approached.
- Natasha, I heard everything! You're probably the only one a kind person in our team. What would I do without your support! I don’t understand why I annoyed them that they hate me so much? I tried not to offend anyone, but they... Well, why? — Inga asked quietly in the voice of an offended child.
- Do not exaggerate! You just need to try to be objective about your shortcomings. Living in a team means taking into account the opinions of others, and not just your own ambitions.
- Yes you are right. I will try. But can I still count on you to give me money before payday? I don’t want to tell my parents about the theft. “They will be upset,” she asked.
- Well, of course, tomorrow I will bring the money. Don't worry. You can’t live life without any losses,” I reassured her.

The next day I brought her money. She even kissed me on the cheek and told me that she would never forget what a great service I had done for her.
A week later we celebrated her birthday. We had a small tea party. Inga brought a large cake and a box of chocolates. The cake was apricot from an expensive French pastry shop. So we looked at each other. Did Inga finally draw conclusions and decide to amaze us with her generosity? But we were wrong. She cut exactly four pieces of cake and, placing them on plates, placed them in front of each of us. The rest of the cake was covered with a lid and hidden.
“The parents said that they would come to visit in the evening,” she explained matter-of-factly. “Dad was incredibly generous and even promised to give me five hundred dollars.” You need to treat them properly! We looked at each other again and laughed in unison. Yes, most likely, no one and nothing can fix such a greedy lipstick... Inga never repaid her debt. But I'm not surprised or angry. After all, this is not at all easy for a greedy person. It’s not without reason that they say that you borrow other people’s money for a short time, but you give yours away forever. Poor Inga, like no one else, knows this...

Remember Plyushkin from “ Dead souls"? What was he like: greedy or thrifty? Are we stingy or thrifty? Even if the man you got is really greedy, he will never admit it. Moreover, his greed (in his words - “frugality”, “concern for tomorrow”, “not wanting to spend money on trifles”, underline what needs to be emphasized) he will present as an indisputable advantage: he is not some kind of spendthrift, he counts every penny. Below are two stories (although there is one hero in them; different heroines), think for yourself who Zhenya is.

Evgeniy met with Tanya. He is a successful programmer, she is a medical student, worked part-time in free time, plus Tanya’s parents helped. Actually, they lived with them. Everything was fine until Tanya suggested moving to a rented apartment: after all, living with parents, no matter how wonderfully understanding they were, was not entirely comfortable. Here she first encountered Zhenya’s misunderstanding: what’s the point of paying for a rented apartment if they and their parents live well? Plus - Tanya’s mother cooks so deliciously, but Tanya herself can’t even cook... Then the question of a vacation arose. Tanya had long wanted to go abroad, which Zhenya knew about and, in general, shared her desire. Tanya ran out of the travel agency in tears and all red. She screamed that Zhenya didn’t need the kind that Zhenya had (the cheapest hotel, only dubious breakfasts, no excursions). For a week they alternated between making peace and arguing, and in the end they decided the following: they would pay for the tour in half, and at the resort itself, everyone would pay for themselves.

Bottom line: Tanya and the group spent the entire vacation sightseeing, visiting local markets, looking at souvenirs, and Zhenya lay near the pool or on the beach, reading a newspaper left by one of the tourists. Upon arrival, they separated, and Zhenya did not hesitate to ask Tanya’s parents to return the money he paid for repairing the gas stove in their house. He apparently forgot to offer money for everything he ate without buying it himself.

A year later, Zhenya meets Olya on a dating site. They started meeting: open skating rinks (they both had their own skates), bicycle rides (bicycles borrowed from friends), picnics in the forest or on the river bank (Olya, like Zhenya, not only eats like a bird, but also absolutely does not accept alcohol. As you understand, this significantly reduces the cost of such walks), in general, romance. A year later they got married. At the wedding, their friends sadly fingered the withered sprigs of parsley and wondered when they would be able to leave here: the young couple did not spend much on music or food. Eventually musical accompaniment there was a rumbling sound coming from the stomachs of the guests.

Now Olya and Zhenya live happily married. They go to night sales in shopping centers. They plan their own trips (why pay a guide or a travel agency?), order household appliances on Chinese websites (of course, you have to wait a long time, but what a benefit!), they dress in second-hand stores (they also have brand new things, right with labels!). True, they can’t have a child yet: they think they can’t afford it. Children are very expensive.

I have a couple of stories. Stories from life, but not mine. Stories to "speculate".
I'll tell you one.

Preface to make it clear:
A relatively small hotel with 100 rooms. The owner of the hotel is Jamaican. The hotel owner's brother has his own bus fleet and drivers. By mutual agreement, these drivers walk around the hotel and offer tourists to go on excursions.

Now the story:
One Driver took a Canadian Couple on an excursion, they became friends and even began to correspond. When the Couple was going to Jamaica again, the Driver offered them to book the same hotel, but at a discount. He, as a local, is entitled to it. The couple agreed and sent the Driver money for the hotel.

Let's say a hotel room costs $200 per night. The driver booked the same room at a discount for, say, 150 per day. And Pare said that for 160 (On the one hand, it’s good for the Couple, they got an excellent discount. On the other hand, the Driver fucked them up, but they are friends).

The couple arrived and brought the Driver a bunch of gifts (this is often the case here), like cool speakers for the bus, watches, eau de toilette for the wife, some clothes and other things. Then the Couple wanted a tour, but asked for a discount as friends. The driver refused the discount, explaining that the bus was not his, and he had to pay for the bus (Actually, he could have given a discount. Pay for the bus, gasoline and tickets, but not take anything for his work. Well, friends. Moreover, they brought gifts, but he wanted to earn money and not waste the day).

The couple was offended by the Driver and assumed that he was simply scamming them out of money and generally deceiving them. And for some reason they decided to check their suspicions. We went to the hotel manager and asked how much their room cost. And, of course, they found out that the cost was less than they were told. For 10 bucks a day.

The couple went to the Driver, made a scandal and demanded to return the difference in price. The driver began to make excuses that the difference went to the bank’s commission for transferring money (Here he almost didn’t lie, our bank takes a 25 dollar commission. If the hotel was booked for 3 nights, then 30 bucks is almost the bank’s commission. But the hotel was booked for 3 weeks, which means the Driver embezzled about $200).

The couple called the police and said that the Driver had stolen thousands of dollars from them and did not want to pay them back. The driver was taken to the bullpen.

Several days of checks, including the bank account, and the Driver was released because... he didn't steal anything. The couple claims that they sent him money into his bank account twice: to pay for the room and then a bunch of thousands of dollars more. And according to the papers from the bank, there is only one transfer: to pay for the hotel.
There, the hotel payment was also made smartly. Those. The driver received money into his account, he booked a hotel room, paid everything from this account at 160 per night, and then received his commission of 10 per night in cash at the hotel.

The couple is relaxing at the hotel, and at the same time telling all the other guests how the Driver robbed them. Well, the Brother of the Hotel Owner fires the Driver “just in case.” So that it does not affect the reputation.

And now attention, the question: who is right in this situation and who is wrong?

Let's start with the fact that the locals have many such “friends”. And if all “friends” do everything for free, then where will the money come from?

However, in my opinion, the Driver acted like an asshole. They brought him gifts, they treated him well. And he fucked people.

On the other hand, the Couple received a decent discount. Which they would never have received on their own. And the fact that the Driver was given a commission for them is none of their business.

On the other hand, since they are “friends,” I could also talk about the commission.

In general, both are wrong, but the Driver is more to blame. I wanted to make money from my “friends,” but I became greedy. I would give them a discount on the excursion and everything would be ok.

Now about the dismissal. The Hotel Owner's Brother could simply ask the Driver not to come for the rest of the time while the Couple is relaxing at the hotel. Well, so as not to get fired. So the Driver is not guilty of anything.

On the other hand, the Driver would continue to mess up, and the hotel’s reputation would continue to fall. So dismissal is the only correct option.

Conclusion: greed does not lead to good.

Male greed is an almost taboo topic: on the one hand, it’s not customary to talk about it, on the other, each of us has something to tell. No, we won’t talk about how a certain Masha wanted an island in the ocean, and the nasty Vasya bought her just a yacht. We will talk about enchanting, fantastic, incredible and amazing male greed. At the very least it will be funny.

Grand Slam Cup

One day my husband, with a sly smile, handed me an elegant package - under rustling skirts wrapping paper something round could be felt.

I eagerly tore off the packaging and discovered a motorcycle helmet, and it was beautiful. Matte, black, with a pink crown and flowers, which, on the one hand, looked quite laconic, on the other hand, gave the device a special charm. That summer I decided to buy a motorcycle, and my husband, an advanced biker, showed his support and approval with such a gift. “The crown is on the helmet because you are Tsareva, and the flowers look like the logo of your company,” he explained.

This was in May.

And at the end of July we broke up. After some time, I remembered that I forgot to pick up the helmet. The husband, who had already been ex-husband by that time, said: “Well, why do you need him? You never bought a motorcycle. Leave it to me." I didn’t argue - firstly, I categorically do not know how to win back material things, and secondly, there was a reason in his words: biking did not take root among my many hobbies. “He needs it more,” I decided, “let him take the girls for rides.” This, in fact, was the background.

Months passed. We both got along personal life. It so happened that I met new girl ex-husband and found her pleasant. And one day she complained to me on ICQ: things didn’t work out with my ex, and when she arrived to pick up her things, she found her favorite motorcycle helmet, his first gift, in terrible shape - as if it had been scratched with sandpaper. “I erased all the flowers,” the girl wrote, “it’s a shame.” “And the crown,” I couldn’t resist, “did you erase the crown too?” - “So that was your helmet?!” - she guessed. It turned out that the gift was given to her with romantic pathos. “Crown, because you are my princess!” - declared the hero-lover.

Unlike me, the girl was very passionate about motorcycles - she had a license, skills, a desire to develop in this direction, and even had a history of disassembling a motor herself. She didn’t part with her beautiful new helmet for the whole season. And after her expulsion, my enterprising ex-husband, as it turned out, found a new owner for the challenge prize. The second girl even caught a glimpse of the third girl. And she even complained about the damaged helmet. “I didn’t know that it was yours,” she became embarrassed, “he gave it to me, but I didn’t like the stupid flowers and the crown.” “No problem,” the noble donor decided and took up the sandpaper.

I find the story of the twice donated helmet rather funny - in any case, everyone to whom it was told laughed incredulously. Even the girl who was left without a helmet ended up having fun.

Natural selection

But just in case, I decided to ask my friends: “Did you really have men who took gifts when they broke up? I beg you, tell me that this is not so! Maybe fate, sensing a passionate humanist in me, decided to throw in a particularly rare specimen, a collectible example of humanity greed? And something terrible turned out to be true.

In the life of almost every woman interviewed, there was a type who considered a gift not her property, but a bonus to her person. Zhanna received a car for her birthday. Old - but so what? The main thing is that it was her first car. Zhanna called it “Schumacher”, almost licked it with her tongue, repaired it to new condition, updated the audio system. A year later, she and the man broke up, and he calmly demanded the keys. "How so? - the friends were indignant. - This is a present for your birthday, twenty-five years old! Don’t give it away!” But it turned out that the moment of donation was that Zhanna was given a general power of attorney - it’s also more convenient, right?

"I decided to create new family and took something..."

Yulia's husband was a quiet intellectual - glasses, a collection of original songs on his iPod, a well-trained voice, good manners. The divorce was also intelligent - Yulia was given a bouquet of asters as a farewell gift, which touched the registry office employee. And one day Yulia returned home and found a note: “Sunny, I’m sorry, I decided to start a new family and took something.” “Some things” are dishes, bed linen, a juicer and... wedding rings.

One of our authors says: “The ex returned all the crap like postcards and photographs, with the note “I can’t look.” “My heart is breaking,” but I kept my laptop, a gigabyte flash drive in a platinum case with a black diamond, and other things that have at least some material value. For some reason my heart didn't break. Even when he sold my laptop at one online auction.”

Love the score

Sometimes it seems to me that modern feminism was invented by men solely for their own benefit. Because girls already have everything - the right to get an education and make a career, and the right to femininity. For most of my friends, weakness and softness are accessories that suit them. Many modern men feminism is not perceived as equal rights for women, but as an opportunity to land on a lady's neck, dangle her legs and drive, cracking the whip. This also applies to financial side life. One of my acquaintances, let’s call him Vasya, insists that in a restaurant his companion should pay half the bill, because “he respects her, she is a person, and they have a partnership.” However, if they stay at home, then cooking dinner is her responsibility, because she is a woman. He is also one of those who sincerely believes in the polygamous nature of men. One day Vasya broke up with his girlfriend because she dared to go to a bar with a colleague. “He likes you!” — Vasya was boiling like the Eyjafjallajokull volcano. “We just drank Margarita,” the girl was perplexed. At the same time, Vasya himself goes on dates, and his profile has been hanging on a dating site for years, periodically bringing in a harvest in the form of romantic seekers of happiness. But he has the right, he is a man. In this case, the bill, I repeat, must be paid in half, Vasily is strict with this.

And the boyfriend of one of my friends narrowed his eyes contemptuously when he saw that she drinks expensive French yoghurts every day. “Women are such reels,” he said. And the girl bought yoghurts with her own money, and her salary was rather large.

“It’s just that men have become advanced,” feminists may say. “Sharing a bill is not greed, but a step towards a brighter future.” “No matter how it is,” I will answer them. If these same men didn’t blame us solely for the mess in the house, they would go on maternity leave for a year, two or three, just like us - then this would, perhaps, be a step forward. And so it’s just an equally paid bill.

Economy class

But the husband of my friend Lida will not be able to show resourcefulness on occasion and take away what he once gave. Because he never gives anything to Lida. Even on New Year. Even on your thirtieth birthday. He didn’t even bring flowers to the windows of the maternity hospital when she gave birth to their son. He earns very well. But they always vacation in Crimea, in the private sector, where it is cheaper. Usually this is a stuffy attic with flies and a toilet like a “hole” to boot. The family does not have a car; both use the metro. Groceries are bought in wholesale stores, clothes - in second-hand stores. They never go to the cinema or to a restaurant. One day I found him boiling expired sausage - he carefully cut off the green pieces, and then boiled the rest in salt water and cheerfully said that the sausage was now “as good as new.”

But I remember Lida as an unmarried skein - every Saturday, there’s a new dress. One day I couldn’t stand it and asked: “Aren’t you having a hard time with him? He’s so greedy, it’s impossible.” And she listened in surprise to the answer: “He is not greedy, he is economical. At first it was very difficult. I even cried and planned to leave. I wanted everything - shoes, lipstick, rollers, and even the latest issue of Cosmo! We had such scandals... But time passed, and I suddenly noticed that even though I had old boots and only three dresses, we had a substantial amount in the bank. Now we have committed to paying off the mortgage, and soon we will have a family nest, which will then be left to our son. Would I be able to live in my own big and beautiful house if I spent money on clothes? So I’m even grateful to my husband - he taught me to prioritize.”

P.S. from the editor

You know, we talked about greed with the most different men. Why do they do all these strange things? Why does the owner of a bank in a cafe split the bill in half with a fourth-year student? (And this happened in our Palestines.) Why do they take back the gifts, even if they don’t know what to do with them later? Why do they count every penny in order to present an invoice later? One of our colleagues was told by her fiancé (a spendthrift and a romantic who, to the envy of all his acquaintances, incredibly pampered her and showered her with flowers and gifts without interruption) on the eve of the wedding that he had a debt - almost twenty thousand euros - and they would pay it off together: “We Now it's family." - “What is the debt for? Is there something at work? — my friend got scared, wondering how she would sell her car in order to save her loved one from prison and money. "No. It’s just that, as you understand, an ordinary accountant cannot earn money for the lifestyle that you and I lead. You didn't refuse flowers, did you? From restaurants? From a new dress? To win you, I took from our bank consumer loan. But don’t be afraid, the two of us will quickly give it away...” The wedding did not take place. And now, just in case, my colleague doesn’t go to expensive restaurants with fans and says that she doesn’t like, almost hates, flowers. Especially white roses.

Oh, yes, girls, you made my eyes widen with your stories.)) Wow, what rednecks! " what can you give me? How can you surprise me“It’s absolutely a woman’s prerogative to ask such questions, and even then! Not everyone will ask them.

I had a history of having a roommate. A simple turner, but handy. I had just gotten a job as an ordinary manager. The first s/n tears. Through brutal savings, in the first year of our relationship, I saved up for his phone, for his birthday, for his anniversary. For my birthday, the gift was so modest that I didn’t even remember it.)) I gradually turned around, climbed the career ladder, and he was still a turner, of some kind. I bought him a second phone (according to the latest fashion). I bought household appliances, furniture, clothes, food, soap and soap for his apartment, etc., etc. His dog got sick, which became mine. He didn't care. And I treated. Prostatitis, cancer, cardiac cough. 3-5 thousand were spent per month on medications alone (excluding visits to veterinarians, tests, etc.). My “friend” thought that this was a useless waste of money (the dog was his friend for 10 years!!!), like "That's the age." We had a separate budget. He spent almost nothing on anything and was sincerely amazed and happy when he once took a printout from his salary card: “Wow! Nevermind, I have 40 mowers saved up!” This is despite the fact that his salary at that time was 17 thousand. Then the crisis, he was out of work for six months, again I supported him, only this time in general “from start to finish”, at first I simply supported him, then I began to put pressure on him that it was time to leave out of depression, you need to pull yourself together and work! I started little by little. To be honest, then Lately Only our “common” dog was holding me next to him. He was already endlessly ill, he chose me as his mistress and I simply could not leave him. She asked to give the dog to me, but my partner blackmailed me with it and did not give it to me. They buried the dog and I left. I left everything. Without false modesty, I am generous and always make an effort to furnish the nest, and I always leave with the words “I’ll buy everything for myself!” And this time I only took my clothes and my plants. But I am still endlessly amazed by such stinginess, when you are not ready to give your last penny to a dog who has been your friend for so many years, when he is ill and in pain. When you gladly accept that your woman supports you. Once she suggested that he re-lay the linoleum in the kitchen. In response: “Well, you’re a businesswoman with us, so order materials and workers!” We weren’t even married, why should I do renovations in his apartment?!

And this happened to me. I recently found out that he got married successfully and gave birth to a daughter. I'm happy for him.) My wife just feels a little sorry for him. And so, every person deserves happiness.