What to do if a man does not take me seriously. You are not taken seriously. What to do if you are not taken seriously

Do people not care about what you say and few people take you seriously? Perhaps you joke more often than you should or made a mistake that they cannot forgive you. Whatever was real reason success is impossible without the respect of others. Be decisive, inspire respect, and avoid past mistakes to be taken seriously.

Steps

Be decisive

    Look into the eyes of your interlocutors. Show that you take your words seriously and actively participate in the conversation. So it will be easier for you to demonstrate attentiveness and psychologically get closer to the interlocutor. Look people in the eye to read facial expressions and notice reactions to your words. This will help you adjust as the conversation progresses.

    Speak clearly. Express your thoughts in a confident voice. No need to mumble, speak very quickly or very slowly. Don't look for the approval of others. Just share your ideas and views.

    Use correct language body. During the conversation, do not lower your head, do not cross your arms or legs. This body language inspires respect, shows your openness and self-confidence.

    Don't speak unnecessarily. Try not to supplement conversations with extraneous jokes or information that is not related to the topic of the conversation. Speak out if it comes to your mind new idea or valuable thought. If you repeat yourself or talk off topic, others will listen to you less.

    • For example, if people are discussing global warming and you recently saw a documentary on the subject, jump into the conversation and share your thoughts. If you are far from the topic of conversation, then it is better to listen silently.
  1. Keep calm. During arguments, try to keep yourself in control and speak in an even voice. If you lose your temper, people will think that you are not able to think clearly. Try to do deep breaths to calm down. If there is a desire to burst into tears or scream, then it is better to go to the restroom for a while and recover.

  2. Don't shirk responsibility. A person is judged by deeds, not by words, so you may have lost your credibility due to inconsistent actions. Take responsibility for your behavior and don't blame others. Take responsibility in new situations and prove your seriousness. Complete extra work and don't expect praise. Show yourself as a mature person.

    • Act to be taken seriously. For example, if others don't see you as a financially responsible person, then create a spreadsheet and start keeping track of your finances.
    • At work, offer your help on new projects, research issues, and offer ideas for improving projects. Find ways to get the job done better and more efficiently, and spot shortcomings that others have missed.
    • Take on more household chores to help the family.

    Inspire Respect

    1. Come early. Be businesslike and show up to meetings or receptions five to ten minutes early. Always respect your time and other people's time.

      • This advice applies to the professional sphere. It's okay to be a few minutes late for parties and other social gatherings.
    2. Read the news. Follow the events in the city, region, country and the world. It’s not enough to just follow pop culture news. Stay up to date with the politics that affect your life to participate in serious discussions.

      • Install news apps on your phone and take fifteen minutes every morning to read the news. You can even subscribe to news reports.
    3. Get ready for assignments and projects. If you were given a task at work or school, then diligently fulfill your duties. Research the issue in order to cope as best you can. If you need to prepare a presentation, then rehearse your speech in advance. Show that you are very serious about the matter.

      • For example, if you need to make a presentation, then prepare the slides in PowerPoint. Use a simplified format, descriptive elements and diagrams. Make sure there are no mistakes and rehearse in front of a mirror.
    4. Dress appropriately for the situation. Keep track of your appearance- Shower regularly, comb your hair and wash your clothes. Thanks to this, you will always look neat and tidy. You don't have to dress like you're going to a board meeting (unless you actually have one), but try to look good.

      • It is better to iron clothes in the evening, so that in the morning you do not rush and have time for everything.
      • Use clothes correctly to form an opinion about yourself.
    5. Earn a good reputation. If you want to be taken seriously, then do not do things that negatively affect your reputation. Do not appear in public under the influence of alcohol or drugs, do not commit crimes and various inappropriate actions. Engage in positive activities like volunteering or otherwise helping the world around you.

      • Follow your posts on in social networks. Don't promote drugs, violence or other negative behavior.
    6. Keep promises. If you made a promise, then you need to keep your word. People don't take seriously those who make empty promises.

      • Let's say you promised an employee that you would pick him up in the morning on your way to work. Be sure to set a reminder on your phone and get up early to keep the promise.
    7. Tell the truth. If you lie often, don't expect to be believed. Nobody wants to trust you important information. Always tell the truth, even if it's not easy. Many people will want to take you seriously if you are sincere with them. People almost always value sincerity and honesty.

      • For example, if you don't know something, say, "I'm not familiar with this topic, but I'll look it up."
    8. Speak up if you disagree. If the person is being rude or misunderstood, speak up. Speak politely and respectfully. show yourself decent person who is ready to stand up for a just cause.

      • For example, your boss has decided to pay a new employee less than his male colleagues because of her gender. Make it clear that this is wrong, and that she deserves the same pay for a similar job.

When last time you did not express your opinion out loud simply because you considered it uninteresting? Have you ever had an idea but didn't implement it because you thought no one needed it? Have you ever given up even before you started doing something, because no one will appreciate your efforts anyway?

So many articles tell us: just do it, don't worry about what anyone thinks. Don't give a damn about the opinions of others. Just work. Chase your dream. Go ahead, don't give up.

If you don't take yourself seriously, all of these articles are worthless. It is always easier to convince yourself that the efforts made will be unimportant and all undertakings will end in failure in any case.

You need to understand: there is a special type of people who quickly fall into euphoria from what they are doing, and just as quickly lose interest in their own endeavors. We need to learn how to focus on what really matters. This is the only way to get to the finish line and tell everyone around about your results.

If you do not take yourself seriously, it will be scary to look back

You spend a lot of time daydreaming but actually doing nothing. You have ideas, but you don't even try to implement them. Or you try but give up quickly. No one cares what you get there anyway.

The worst thing is to wake up in 10 years and remember all those times when you almost started to implement your project, but never finished. And there was something worthwhile. And it wouldn't be hard to finish what you started. And the idea was great.

If you don't take yourself seriously, you lose your sense of reality.

You will end up living a life that you don't like. You will look forward to discovering your passion, love, and calling. In this expectation, you will work at an unloved job, filling your time with unnecessary and uninteresting things. Sooner or later you will feel that you have locked yourself in your own body. And it is not clear who then controls all this madness.

The worst thing is to wake up after 10 years and realize that you have lost touch with your personality. And you don't know who you really are. And you do not see any difference between what and what other people want from you.

If you don't take yourself seriously, you'll lose your place on the podium.

And then you start to notice how someone else puts your ideas into practice. And all that's left for you is to stomp on the sidelines and say: "It was my idea." Maybe so. But only another person took it seriously. And he took himself seriously too. "If it's interesting to me, it might be interesting to someone else," he thought. And implemented the idea.

If you don't take yourself seriously, negative emotions will eat you up.

When you don't take yourself seriously, you resent those who do. Those who talk about themselves. Those who promote themselves. Their ideas will seem selfish and ridiculous to you. Or you look at the people you like and see once again that you will never be that cool.

By not taking yourself seriously, you are self-sabotaging. You constantly execute and scold yourself, wasting time and opportunity. When something doesn’t work out for you, you only make sure that you spent your energy in vain.

Perhaps things would be different if you initially thought: “Since I decided to start something and put the time and effort into it, it’s definitely worth it.”

You get depressed. You are angry with yourself. You are disappointed in yourself. “Why am I not doing anything,” you say frustrated. The main thing is that you no longer believe that you are capable of something. It is too late.

Not really.

Everything around you is opportunity.

You don't know what you want to do. It scares. You don't even know how to do it. It's complicated. But, when you start taking yourself seriously, the answers to these questions will appear sooner or later. For the simple reason that you will trust yourself, believe in yourself and start working. When you believe with all your heart that your ideas are valuable, you will go into battle every time. And then people around you will start to take you seriously. Don't hide your ideas - implement them.

First you believe in yourself. Then we believe you.

One of my subscribers, let's call her Olga, recently shared her pain with me.

While she was working in the office, her colleagues, acquaintances and girlfriends were happy to communicate with her.

After Olga quit her job, took up sewing and developed her project on the Internet, the situation changed.

And if earlier on the personal page of VKontakte, acquaintances and girlfriends put likes under Olga's posts and wrote comments, now they seem to have forgotten about her.

Why is this happening?

Why don't people around you take remote work seriously and don't believe that you can successfully develop your projects on the Internet and earn decent money at the same time? Let's think about this question together.

Do not worry! Everyone faces it

By the way, almost everyone who starts working remotely or develops their project on the Internet faces a misunderstanding of others. I am no exception either.

People like me are considered eccentrics by many, and this is normal. Everything new always causes distrust, fear and all sorts of fears. If people have been accustomed to “going to work” for decades, then it is very difficult for them to call a person who works at home a worker.

It seems to me that such an attitude of people around to working on the Internet can be caused by several reasons.

Changed interests - changed the circle of communication

The main reason is quite banal - your new interests do not intersect with the interests of your former environment.

Girlfriends and acquaintances, visiting your page in VK, see completely different posts that were before. There was some incomprehensible sewing for them ...

Gradually they forget about you, because people read, watch and listen only to what they are interested in.

Loss of status

The next reason is that you have lost your STATUS in the eyes of your environment. Yes, STATUS is very important for many people. Who you are? What position do you hold? How can you be helpful? And if you do not have this very status, then there is nothing to take from you ... Why continue to communicate with you?

For example, they often try to teach me my mind-reason former colleagues and leaders. They say that I am “doing foolishness”, that I need to go to a “normal job”, that I am sitting at home, getting dumber and no one knows me, and earlier, when I was a leader, many people knew and respected me. And now you, Oksana, who? You are nobody!!!

These are the kind of speeches that representatives of my past environment periodically say to me on the street. At first I was upset - now it’s already allowed 🙂

You can’t earn serious money on the Internet: it’s all a scam and nonsense

The third reason is the absolute misunderstanding of what you specifically do. What are you doing on this computer anyway? Is it possible to earn money on the Internet? All this is a scam and nonsense!!!

You just don't want to work and that's why you quit, and your husband is forced to earn money for your entire family alone! He is poor and unfortunate, who was not lucky with his wife, and you are a lazy and loafer who does not want to work. Why talk to a lazybones?

By the way, I personally know a girl who earns more on the Internet than her husband, but her mother-in-law does not love her and is sure that her son supports the family and constantly feels sorry for him.

Of course, they tried to explain to her that this is not so, but she does not believe. She thinks that her son is deliberately deceiving so that she does not sulk at her daughter-in-law.

Fear of looking stupid

The next reason is that your friends may feel embarrassed because you are so advanced, you are developing your online project, and they only know how to put likes on VKontakte.

People are driven by the fear of looking stupid. In this case, communication with you is likely to be terminated. This also happens. And you need to take it easy.

Ordinary human envy

So we got to the fifth reason. Do you know what she is about? It's about envy. Yes, yes, as soon as something starts to work out for you and your online project goes uphill, there will definitely be people who will stop greeting you, and quite possibly start washing your bones behind your eyes.

Do you know why this happens? Because they ENVY you.

You were able to quit a job you hated and open your own own project, but they are not. You have found your favorite job and earn money on it, and they go every day to a disgusting job that takes all their strength, but they are afraid to quit.

And you are not afraid! So be prepared for the fact that you will not see any likes and comments under your posts from these people. And do you need them?

Everything is not so bad and you should not be upset!

We figured out the reasons, but in fact, you should not be upset because of all this. Do you know why?

Because gradually a new environment will begin to form in you. They will be completely different people and they will look like you.

Here they will put you likes and write comments.

This is how my new environment was formed. I met these interesting and advanced people at various training courses and programs.

And there are a lot of these people around me now! Some of them have become my Internet friends, which makes me very happy!

Thank God that my friends from offline (and there are only a few of them and we have been friends for 20-30 years) continue to communicate with me 🙂

Of course, they do not understand much about what exactly I am doing, but I can see that they are sincerely happy for me.

It’s a pity that my VKontakte friends are very rare and almost never put likes under my posts. But I don't need likes from them. These people are very dear to me by live communication and I know the value of those rare hours that we spend together ...

I would be glad if you leave your comments on this article, and if you have not yet joined my VKontakte group, then it's time to do it. Join

Reading time - 4 minutes.

From the article you will learn: why next to a man a woman feels worse than she really is; what to do to be open and confident in a relationship, to feel like yourself.

“I was ready for serious relationship with him, and he didn't take me seriously."

“I really wanted him to support my ideas and help me in self-realization, but he seemed to pay no attention to my aspirations.”

“We broke up, and I was left with the feeling that this man never recognized me, his idea of ​​​​me did not reveal even a hundredth of my potential.”

"I think he thinks I'm a lot dumber and simpler than I really am."

Women often come with similar requests.

“In his eyes, I reflect worse than I really am” - this thought unites all the above complaints. Moreover, a similar topic is addressed by both women who are just starting to build relationships with a new man, and those who long years is in marriage.

Let's try to figure out how it turns out that next to a man a woman can feel worse than she is?

Illusions

People tend to plunge into the world of their illusions. Imagine how beautifully they could act in a given situation. To fantasize how bright life would be if they revealed their talents. To think about what great inclinations are inside, if only to realize them, to wait for that very moment.

As we dive deep into dreams, we lose touch with reality. Then the boundary between who a person is now and who he wants to become is washed away. It may seem that we are already such that everything is already there.

Women love to look at celebrity pages on Instagram and draw parallels with them. Building comparisons on insignificant features, forgetting about significant differences.

When a man looks at you, he sees YOU, not your fantasies and plans. He sees the result at the moment here and now. And looking at herself in his reflection, a woman is often disappointed. In fact, it's a disappointment that her dreams of herself right now aren't a reality.

Inner Critic

The second reason why a man does not look at a woman the way she would like is a strong inner critic living inside her. Being in front of a man, every minute a woman takes an exam for the right to be herself.

She serves with a silent question: “I cook deliciously?”, Has sex with a silent question: “I good lover?” achieves career results with the silent question: “Am I a successful woman?”.

Since this question was originally in the head of a woman, and for herself there is no clarity and peace on this topic, a man, as the most close person, most likely, will begin to exacerbate it. He will do this through jokes, criticisms, or similar painful methods. His silent task is to exacerbate this question in her head so that she gives herself at least some answer to it.

He is like the last hope

Another reason why a woman does not like how a man perceives her is that she considers him main opportunity make her life better.

To make her not what she is now, but what she always dreamed of being. IN such a case, looking at a man, she sees not him himself, but the benefits that he can, and sometimes, according to a woman, even should, bring into her life.

Certainly in similar situation, many men will see a woman as she is now, and her true intentions for this relationship. And such a picture of yourself for a woman will be unpleasant.

What to do so that you like your reflection in the eyes of a man?

Tip #1 - be

Feel the difference between dream and reality, move step by step in the direction of your dreams. Perhaps this path will be longer than in illusions, but on every segment of this path. And the man will see you just like that.

Tip #2 - be yourself

If a man chooses a woman, then for him there are no questions about her. She is one big answer to him. And the most you can do to strengthen relationships is to live your life happily. First of all, for yourself. Proving nothing to anyone.

If a woman is in search, then the more clarity she has about herself, the faster she meets a man. Because it is visible. Her character and values ​​are clear. In the eyes of a man, she will remain herself.

Tip #3 - Lean on your center

When a woman goes into a relationship to take, she most often meets a male consumer. Burning about him, in the next relationship she will want to take even more, and she meets a new consumer. Such men do not look at the values ​​and needs of a woman, do not take her seriously, just as she does not take them seriously, seeing them only as opportunities.

When we learn to rely on ourselves, we. We feel better, we become filled. And at that moment we gain the opportunity to see a partner. See him himself. Appreciate him, respect him, love him. It is then that in the eyes of a partner we begin to see our reflection, which inspires us.

Be yourself, know and feel yourself, become a good support for yourself, rejoice in both your condition and your results, then you will always like yourself in the reflection of other people.

Deal with your reflection will help you and/or generative with Maria Permyakova. An hour is enough to resolve your request.