Why am I so special or how not to be an outcast. Why am I such a fool

That female psychology- a mysterious and inexplicable thing, men of all times and peoples guessed. Every representative of the fair sex from time to time asks herself this sacramental question, why am I such a fool?

The wording may change, but the meaning will never change! The girl reproaches herself for some actions, remembering in detail what happened on that ill-fated day. Who is to blame and what to do? Why am I such a fool? Should you blame yourself for something and constantly call yourself a fool?

The woman begins to engage in self-flagellation, trying to prove to herself that everything invented is actually true. Is there any way to avoid all of the above?

Certainly! You just need to get out of the imagined reality as soon as possible and you can safely think through this situation.

Why am I such a fool or female psychology

Psychologists say that most of the fair sex actually behave like fools quite often. Can we say that this happens to every woman? Of course, you can’t do without this. Like a wave that literally covers your head and it’s unlikely that you’ll be able to emerge immediately.

It is worth looking for an answer to the question: why am I such a fool? Or why are all women stupid? This is probably due to genetic level. Women cannot think logically, they live by emotions. While a man can soberly assess the situation, a woman will not be able to immediately find her bearings.

What does it take to come to your senses? Of course, time is the engine of progress.

You shouldn't make quick decisions, they obviously won't be rational. Here, rather, everything is the other way around, accepted fast decision will soon have a detrimental effect on your life.

Women's psychology in love and relationships

1. Jealousy

Give gifts to others beautiful girls admiring glances - such is the nature of men. There's nothing wrong with that. If there is harmony in your relationship and you are confident in yourself and your companion, there is no reason for fear, and he will not cheat on you.

Perhaps your loved one is deliberately making you jealous. Understand that if he really decided to cheat on you, he will do everything so that you don’t find out about it. Therefore, his communication with another girl in front of you is not a sign of his readiness to cheat.

Jealousy is fraught with enormous destructive potential. It will gnaw at you from the inside like a worm and can be fatal to your relationship. If you do have to deal with your man’s infidelity, don’t take it personally. And you shouldn’t be tormented by the question, why am I such a fool?

This is his mistake, a consequence of the fact that initially your relationship developed according to the wrong scenario. Dealing with the betrayal of a loved one is hard, but imagine how much harder it would be if things went even further?

2. You forget about your lover's personal space

You should not try to find out what is not directly reported. Men are much more closed creatures than women. They are not ready to talk about their problems. They are more accustomed to experiencing everything within themselves and trying to eliminate the difficulty that has arisen on their own.

There is no need to “get under your skin” every time your partner is “out of sorts.” There are times when a person simply needs to be alone, to organize his thoughts and feelings.

3. You are already relaxed

This is the most common reason why a man leaves for another woman or decides to cheat. A girl always needs to take care of herself. Availability permanent partner doesn't mean you can forget to take care of your appearance. On the contrary, your loved one should not doubt the correctness of the choice made and rejoice at every meeting.

4. The meaning of your life lies in it

This is a terrible mistake a woman makes. Try to fill your life as much as possible significant events, work, social life, communication with friends, do whatever you want, but do not turn a person into the meaning of your life.

Otherwise, sooner or later he will feel it and begin to take you for granted. As soon as he gets bored with your endless love and care, he will leave you.

5. Innuendo

Everyone has problems, and when he sees that something is wrong with you, he begins to wonder about the reason for your bad mood. If you really don't want to discuss it, then try not to show that you're in trouble. However, when you answer his question about what happened, “Nothing,” but at the same time expect him to continue his questions, then you are doing the wrong thing.

This behavior is typical for almost all girls and it terribly infuriates men. This may lead to Once again he simply will not be interested in your problems. He won't want to extract every word from you. And then, again, the question will come to myself, why am I such a fool?!

6. Excessive nagging

Doesn't exist in this world ideal people and your idea of ​​who should be with you will never correspond to reality. You need to come to terms with this!

It is permissible to slightly correct the behavior of your beloved, but this should be done carefully, for example: “Beloved, I love it so much when you…. It upsets me so much when a person..."

It is worth noting that you-statements with a positive connotation are perceived well, but you should not use them to discuss your complaints. They automatically push your interlocutor towards confrontation with you.

7. You don't appreciate him.

Stop focusing on what was done, was done wrong, or wasn’t done at all. Praise him for what was done for you and for your sake. IN modern world It is not customary to praise men, but this does not mean that they do not need warm, sincere words. This will allow you to be treated with more understanding and love.

On a subconscious level, a woman often turns a blind eye to basic things: is her man flirting with another person? She will pretend that nothing is happening, but the man will think that she is a fool. Is it possible not to notice obvious things? It turns out that it is possible, you just need to look at the situation from a completely different angle and everything will immediately fall into place.

Gullible and naive girls can also be called fools, because in modern society You can’t be a fool, you will definitely be “eaten.”

In fact, you don’t need to ask yourself obsessive questions and reproach yourself with why I’m such a fool. Real fools never ask why they are fools.

This question is asked to Yandex by representatives of the fair sex as many as 15,000 times a month. And the question is why you? How often young ladies suffer from feeling sorry for themselves. They regret because they did things they shouldn’t have done. We called our ex, had too many conversations at a corporate party, said the wrong words to our boss, got behind the wheel in bad mood. But now everything has already happened and they sit, lament and wonder - why am I such a fool?...

But don’t be discouraged - you are not alone. And not even one out of ten or a hundred. Zhvanetsky once said that all women are divided into “charming, what fools” and “horror, what fools.” But we are sure that the satirist dug below the surface and in fact there are much more such varieties.

Common fool

Such women have filled everything and everyone. They are met in the store, among neighbors and even among their own girlfriends. Such persons try not to attract attention to themselves and remain silent as much as possible in order to “pass as smart.” They have neither the rudiments of intelligence, nor elementary logic, nor even a sense of humor. You can’t talk to them about philosophical topics or about art, since their whole brain is busy thinking about “what to wear for Lizka’s birthday,” what to cook for dinner, how to beg a fur coat from their husband, and the like. They strive to get married as soon as possible and rush at the first man who dares to call them to the registry office, immediately give birth to a child, and then a second one, which is how they occupy their entire life. They find so-called girlfriends among the same “hens” who are ready to talk for hours about how their child has a rash on his butt, her husband drinks and “Lyuda, the bitch, has her eye on their goat.” We hope the image is clear and recognizable.

Horrible, what a fool

This type is even worse. These individuals consider themselves queens, walk around with overgrown hair, extended nails that look more like tiger claws, and half-length eyelashes or false eyelashes. To them it seems “glamorous” and they consider everyone who is not like them “trash.”
She tries in every possible way to pretend to be “cute”, while dressing provocatively and tastelessly, smokes a lot and considers herself an intellectual, simply retelling the thoughts of some people she has just read, often misinterpreting them. Every time she complains about her loneliness and that “the man went with the wrong one.” Dreams of a prince - a hybrid of Johnny Depp and Prokhorov. But if this person is interested in a man, then the only way to get rid of her is by running away.

City Crazy

The way these young ladies dress does not allow one to accurately determine their age. Fashion for her is timeless. She's a little schoolgirl with funny pigtails with obvious age wrinkles. At the same time, she manages to get things from " grandma's chest"Adding some crazy handmade stuff to them, considering it extremely attractive. Moreover, such persons almost always walk with dogs of an unknown breed. Most often she is well-read and can spend hours discussing the early work of A. Blok, which bores and scares men away from her.

Vast fool

A plump, boorish person, with a sonorous voice that is unpleasant to the ear. As soon as he opens his mouth, it’s better to run. Not only does she speak nonsense, she also speaks categorically. Most often, the wives of 100% henpecked men are short, husky men who, most likely, were dragged into the registry office by force. Not a woman, but a tank. If this is a real Russian woman, then we would be better off living in another Russia.

Silly

Especially strange with an unstable psyche. He believes that he is expressing himself by constantly changing his toxic hair color - from pink to blue. She dresses casually, calling it “grunge” style, but is not at all interested in art. Martian dialect and completely incomprehensible thinking to the world. You can have a nice chat with her one evening, but as soon as she calls you, you are unlikely to want to pick up the phone. A sort of “disposable” girlfriend. And her education, as a rule, is something like courses in nail extensions.

Educated fool

With one, two, or even three higher educations, which will force you to call her a “fool” at any impulse. No, a person who graduated from a university cannot be a fool. At the same time, she is a star. She strives to please all the teachers, crams, sits in libraries and prepares hundreds of coursework a month. The stupidity is that in everyday life there is absolutely nothing to talk about with her, and at work she is useless. These are the young ladies who work as office managers, complaining about their fate. Or they sit at home, making excuses that with their intellect there is no one to work in Russia. They think that “Woe from Wit” is about them.

Poetesska

He writes poetry, considering them simply masterpieces. At the same time, he quotes constantly. Yourself. Well, somehow... He admires himself and considers those around him to be rabble. She runs her own blog and is surrounded by a gang of enthusiastic “graphomaniacs”. She has a squeaky voice, but fancies herself an opera diva, constantly proving this to herself in her soul. She believes that her purpose is to make some producer happy who will admire her.

Soulful fool

Kindness itself and universal sorrow. Helps everyone and everyone, regardless of whether they ask her or not. At the same time, she later laments for a long time that no one appreciated her help. He doesn’t pass by homeless kittens, he serves them to every drunk. He considers himself a real angel and laments the inferiority and baseness of the world. She is friends with all men, even those who meanly abandoned her. Her kindness is actively taken advantage of, but she doesn’t even understand it.

Bunnies, pussies and more

She is the entire personification of what she has seen enough in films and glossy magazines. She rehearsed her gestures and smiles in front of the mirror. She does her hair like Halborn, puts on a dress like Sarah Jessica Parker and gets her nails done at the same salon as... whatever! She is all peeping, licked, projected onto herself. No one knows how real she is. Even herself. Because it doesn’t really exist. But she is the decoration of the office and the dream of a rich businessman; you never feel ashamed in society with her, since she always parodies behavior, adapting to the situation.

Classics of the genre. Real fool

Do you think these don't exist anymore? But no. A lot of them. She falls in love, just as Turgenev's heroine is tormented by her love. She is ready to achieve her hero, suffer and be the “wife of a Decembrist,” despite the fact that the chosen object of adoration is an uncouth, uneducated freak. Constant suicidal attacks are her normal state.

Professional fool

The pea buffoon is about her. She graduated from a theater or circus school. She constantly entertains everyone. She is a stock of jokes. She participates in KVN and all cultural events. She's not shy about anything.

In fact, this is far from a complete classification. You can dig up a lot more specimens that can easily be called fools. But on the other hand, who is NOT a fool then? Have you met anyone like this? We are not. Maybe not a fool, but just a woman?

Any girl periodically asks herself a question in her mind: why am I such a fool and how to change it. The wording may change, but the meaning remains the same. The girl reproaches herself for some actions and mistakes that are very difficult to correct, but would be very easy to foresee. Should you blame yourself, call yourself a fool and reproach yourself in every possible way, or should you get rid of this feeling?

So, it’s worth starting with the fact that girls very often really act like fools . Although many of them do not agree with this accusation, especially when it comes from the mouth of a man, sometimes the truth is not on your side. Read the article about what irritates men in women and perhaps you will recognize in yourself the traits of some stupid girls who behave like fools.

It is not possible to unequivocally answer the question of why women are fools; this is determined at the genetic level. Women cannot think logically, are unable to make quick and rational decisions, and often succumb to emotional outbursts, which leads to an incorrect assessment of the situation. Then they beat themselves up and try to fix everything, asking, while sobbing into their pillow, why I’m such a fool. Naturally, not all women are like this, but most are for sure.

Women drive cars poorly, talk on the phone for a long time, can blurt out something offensive that they will regret later, they pass, why am I such a fool test and then are surprised at the number of points scored. In general, you can make many mistakes, but some are difficult to overcome, because they change your life radically and confirm many statements about women. Let's now talk about such situations.

  • many guys ask themselves the question why is my girlfriend a fool and why doesn't she see that I'm flirting with someone else right behind her back? In fact, the girl sees, she simply closes her eyes to what is happening, they sincerely believe that the guy still loves only her and all these pranks will not affect their warm feelings. The girl becomes mature woman and continues to believe her husband’s words when he assures him that he is staying for a meeting or going on a business trip. Many aphorisms about women are dedicated to this very gullibility.
  • But any deception becomes exposed and then the husband thinks why his wife is a fool, and my wife thinks - really, why am I such a fool. After all, I knew that he was cheating, I knew that sooner or later he would leave me or ruin our lives, but I still believed him. That is, the key feature of such accusations is the fact of the awareness that no one is to blame except the woman. It is important.

Many psychologists consider self-flagellation destructive for patients who repent of their mistakes. Inflicting mental suffering on oneself as a punishment for mistakes causes the personality to degrade even more and sink into the abyss of chronic depression.

  • There may also be the opposite situation, when a woman acts as a mistress and naively believes that a man will leave his wife and live with her. She wonders why they think I’m a fool and don’t believe in my happiness. And everyone thinks so, because they know that the man will not go anywhere, he will live with his wife and children, and he is simply fooling you.
  • How often do we ourselves wonder why my sister is a fool? or my girl, because she doesn’t pay attention to obvious things. In fact, this is not stupidity, but naivety and gullibility. No matter what anyone says, it’s easy to make a girl feel sorry for her, somehow make her talk, gain her trust and use her for her own selfish purposes. All this does not mean that the girl is a fool, she is just naive.
  • We also don't really ask ourselves why blondes are stupid. s, we just take it for granted. We read jokes about blondes, make fun of our fair-haired classmates, confirming and sincerely believing in one of the stereotypes of our society. Blondes, in turn, are in no hurry to resist this misconception and take advantage of their image as fools. Benefits everyone.
  • Very often such accusations can be heard during family quarrels , especially between parents and teenagers. After swearing and accusations of misunderstanding, the girl locks herself in her room and thinks why her mother is a fool. After that, she writes poetry on her blog about why I’m such a fool, how unfair the world is, and tells her friends that no one in the whole wide world understands her.

You don't really need to think too much about it why am I such a fool, because if you asked yourself this question, then you are no longer automatically one. After all, real fools don’t even suspect that they are like that, the lack of self-criticism and the opportunity to look at their behavior from the outside, the main thing hallmark stupid Take care of yourself, don’t self-examine. Think positively, here are some links that will help you with this

Situations like “What’s gotten into me?” inevitably arise. and “Why am I such a fool?” This is in addition to “I didn’t expect this from him!” and “How could he?” So what happens? If for some reason I act like a fool, that's own choice or the influence of "evil" environment?

“What suddenly came over me? Why did I do this? Lord, why am I such a fool?!” This or something like this is how many important things often end. It’s as if someone is suggesting stupid decisions, pushing her to do stupid things that she herself “would never do.” It’s time to figure out once and for all why this “someone” always drives us into dead ends and arranges completely unnecessary adventures. Knowledge of Yuri Burlan’s training will help with this “ System-vector psychology».

So what pushes us to do stupid things and puts us in a stupid position? Everyone has their own reason. And sometimes there are several. The final “diagnosis” of why I am such a fool depends on the innate properties of the psyche - vectors, in terms of system-vector psychology. We can identify several basic reasons, which we will focus on in more detail.

It must be said that nature is infallible. Watch the animals. When do they make stupid mistakes? Only if they find themselves in an unnatural environment. Man is more complex, but the principle of infallibility of nature is unchanged. No fools were created. In addition, any living creature comes for pleasure or, if there is no other way, from the whip.

So what happens? If for some reason I behave like a fool, is it my own choice or the influence of the “evil” environment?

It's a choice without a choice. The life scenario is controlled by our psyche. Everyone is given desires by nature from birth, and they are provided by the properties of the psyche. This means that any of our “wants” already contains a necessary and sufficient set of possibilities. And the only task is to realize your destiny as much as possible, following your natural desires. And, as a result, be happy and successful.

But for some reason it doesn’t always work out...

“Lovely, what a fool” or “horrible, what a fool!”


What happens... Three main reasons hinder our happiness: overstress, or rather, the inability to adapt it, lack of implementation and underdevelopment properties of vectors or psychological traumas learned from childhood. But none of these reasons in itself is an insurmountable obstacle to enjoying life. Obstacles arise when we don't know ourselves. We do not understand own desires and opportunities. Or when we demand attention from others, the “right” actions, without understanding THEIR desires.

Situations like “What’s gotten into me?” inevitably arise. and “Why am I such a fool?” This is in addition to “I didn’t expect this from him!” and “How could he?”

Important! Happy, fulfilled people also do stupid things. And even more often than others they seem strange from the outside. These are the “fools” who are always lucky. Only, firstly, they one hundred percent accept full responsibility for any, even the most stupid, actions. And secondly, the ideas that seem the most stupid later become scientific discoveries, brilliant works of art.

Why? Because, as already said, nature is infallible. We ourselves make mistakes, not knowing our nature, trying to conform to other people's ideas. And here it’s our own choice - rolling our eyes, once again exclaiming “why am I such a fool” or recognizing the real ourselves. Your ideal self!

How? At the free online training by Yuri Burlan “System-vector psychology”. Register - .

Proofreader: Natalya Konovalova

The article was written based on training materials “ System-vector psychology»

Well, who among us does not experience moments in life when we want to burn with shame, crawl into a dark crevice, cover our heads with a pillow, dissolve or turn into a molecule invisible to someone else’s eye? When the only thought is beating and groaning in your head: “Well, why am I such a fool?!” Why, why did I get drunk yesterday and call this indifferent, heartless brute, this womanizer (I was stupid at a meeting, put on that stupid dress that cracked on my ass, took it and crashed the car)?

Comfort yourself! You're not the only one. The sacramental question “why am I such a fool” is asked to Yandex by 15 thousand unfortunate people every month. Just imagine how many of these people haven’t yet thought to ask a search engine, and they channel their beloved girlfriends, mothers, and cats?

Thanks to Michal Mikhalych Zhvanetsky, who is able to explain the essence of things in a nutshell, we all know that there are two types of women: “Lovely, what fools” and “Horrible, what fools.” Penetrating deeper and pushing, so to speak, the boundaries of imagination, let's try to expand this range. After all, there is no limit to perfection, especially in this matter, isn’t it?
An ordinary fool or just a fool
You can find it everywhere: at work, in a nearby store, in your own entrance, even on your page in Odnoklassniki. An unremarkable creature that never expresses its opinion out loud and tries to sneak past you unnoticed. Accidentally looking into her transparent grey eyes hiding in fluffy eyelashes, I want to say: “Is anyone home?” And at home she has a beloved husband and children, and lace napkins on the windowsill under each flower. Well, what a fool!

Terrible fool (Fool, just terrible!)
She pretends to be a “pretty little fool.” Her motto: “Nothing makes a woman look better than hydrogen peroxide.” The presence of wild fleece is a must. The preferred lipstick color is blood red. Clothes – bright. Clothing style – eclectic, i.e. complete disharmony, in fact, in the head too. For drinks, he prefers strongly brewed tea, sipped with a mouthpiece. He smokes exclusively strong cigarettes. As a rule - lonely. “Oh, I’m so lonely!..” God forbid you show interest in her, you will be “loved” to death. Run away, leaving scraps of your clothes and buttons in her tenacious fingers while they are still intact.

Stupid or City Crazy
Her manner of dressing distracts her from the desire to determine the real age of this specimen. A skillful move, for those who understand. Her fashion is timeless and beyond competition, because no one but her thought of sewing a new green collar onto a ten-year-old coat, crocheted with his own hand. The lady is always with a dog of the same unknown breed and age. Well-read, intelligent, unobtrusive. She is never seen in connections that discredit her.

Impossible fool (size matters)
The vastness of her form, coupled with the height of a grenadier, a loud voice and a peremptory manner of saying loudly and out loud absolutely impossible things, blows away everything within a radius of three meters. One gets the impression that her great-grandfather was Lieutenant Rzhevsky himself. If you need to impress someone positive impression, take it with you. For contrast, so to speak.

Stupid (aka Stupid)
Hair color changes twice a week, from bright blue to soothing soft pink. Although, I’ve hardly heard of Picasso. Clothing style is casual. Makes contact easily and naturally. It turns out the same way, since few people understand her Martian dialect. He smokes, and not just cigarettes. Incomplete secondary education, in best case scenario- Nail extension courses. Not a tramp, right?

A complete fool (with completed higher education)
The desire for knowledge and conquering new universities comes down to collecting educational diplomas, which she will never have to use for their intended purpose. Let it be. She likes the process itself, and let the horses do the work. For a complete fool there is no limit to self-improvement. Often, they become regulars at psychiatric clinics due to mental overstrain. In general, - woe from the mind.

Refined fool (poetess)
He writes poetry and bursts out with his “masterpieces” to anyone who happens to be at hand. He runs his own poetry blog, which is visited by enthusiastic and equally crazy graphomaniacs. She loves to sing opera arias in the shower in a high and shrill voice, imagining herself as Sarah Brightman. She dreams of making someone happy, for example, marrying a famous producer, living in Bali and painting watercolors from life. In general, something like this.

Soulful fool (virtue itself)
She is always ready to come to the rescue and save the world, even in the person of a neighbor who demands twenty for his hangover. She feeds all the cats in the area, which is why in the already shabby and dirty entrance, the “amber” and relations with neighbors are appropriate. Her vest is wet from the tears of those suffering for help. Connects her with men sincere friendship, even with those who once decided to sleep with her.

Beautiful fool (babe, me)
It is all created from poses, smiles, voice timbre and gestures, repeatedly practiced in front of the mirror. Her simple, but silent and graceful movements around the office attract attention and act hypnotically. Such a beautiful fool will decorate not only the office, but also the vacation of a bored businessman looking for a charming travel companion for a trip to United Arab Emirates for a couple of weeks.
Classic fool (yes, yes!)
This character seemed to be lost in the pages of Russian classics. But no, he is still alive today. Or rather she. She is amorous, dreamy and selfless, like Turgenev’s young lady. For an “outburst of unbridled passion for a subject” to occur, insurmountable obstacles to it are required. Otherwise it’s boring and uninteresting. Experiences - every time, like the first time. With accompanying suicidal escapades.

Professional fool (clown)
They are taught in circuses, as well as in cultural and educational schools. Their profession is to fool and entertain the masses. Professionally. They can be found among the leading entertainment television shows, in KVN and comic programs on TV. They are not afraid to be funny and absurd, because this is their profession. Why be ashamed?

This classifier of fools and their subtypes can be continued indefinitely. And the further we delve into the study of this subject, the more copies can be discovered and immortalized in this register. So don’t torment yourself with the question “why am I such a fool.” You are not a fool! It's just that you are a woman. And women are allowed sweet feminine stupidities, even if these stupidities are limitless. This is why they love us.