Does a man's appearance matter to a girl? Does a woman's appearance matter to a man?

Some people are probably well aware of the old saying that says: “Men love girls with their eyes, and girls love them with their ears.” Undoubtedly, there is a grain of truth in these words, because sayings and proverbs do not just appear among the centuries.

ordinary modern life, no matter how trite it may be, is built according to the same fabulous principles. Ordinary decent girls will never look for guys on the pages of glamorous publications, but will meet ordinary young people on the street or in transport. It is generally accepted that handsome men are always real professional. When a man meets, there is immediately a complete distrust of him and a search for hidden intent in his actions.

It often turns out that many attractive men often suffer because of their appearance and are very modest in nature.

Appearance or inner world?

How much attention do girls pay appearance men? There can be no single answer to this question and there should not be. Almost everyone has their own ideal native person, feelings for which draw their beautiful image of a lover. Most often, people consider beautiful and attractive those people who are close in spirit to them, similar to them internally and externally, those who have a common ethnic status with them.

It has been proven that in the appearance of a man, any woman is definitely attracted by his height (again, according to taste, for some - low, for others - high) and muscle mass (here, too, to choose from).

If a girl has a choice between a stupid, narcissistic and rude handsome man and a modest, caring unsightly young man, she will most likely choose the second one, since it is more important for her to feel protected and confident next to a man, and not be proud of his beauty, knowing that he has a void inside.

However, the most important thing to consider is that life will need to be lived not with a beautiful cover, but with an honest, decent person that it will be necessary to raise and educate children not with a tall athlete with a relief, but with a kind and responsible man. You need to listen to your heart, believe not in appearance, but in human actions and appreciate with your soul. It doesn’t matter how many people around you will like your spouse in the future. Your friends may laugh at your choice, but you will know that the person who is next to you will never leave you or betray you.

Many insecure guys often wonder if I'm pretty enough to seduce girls? And they immediately take a step back. And in fact they It would be worth considering whether male beauty is so important for girls? And is it worth it to fear that your girlfriend will one day be taken away by some beefy macho? In this article we will talk about whether appearance is important for a man. And I will try to debunk those myths and stereotypes that may have already formed in your head.

Is appearance so important?

If you are afraid that your beautiful girlfriend leaves you for another, more handsome guy, then it’s completely in vain. She can leave you if you behave like a nerd, stop living up to her expectations, and suddenly someone will turn up who will be cooler and more confident than you. This will also happen if you do not observe the so-called balance of significance, which we have already spoken about. That is why she will go not to a more beautiful one, but to someone who seems to her more “a man” than you. However, this does not exclude at all that such a “brutal” cannot have a pumped-up body and an attractive appearance. And then she will definitely be lucky, but you, alas, no.

To feel more confident, you should take a pickup training. By enrolling in one of my courses, you will have access to an amazing tool that will give you everything you want.

You need to think not about your appearance, but about what is important for girls in a relationship. Although this does not at all relieve you of the obligation to simply monitor your appearance and look neat. Otherwise, your girlfriend will simply start to be shy of you in public, and it will not be easy to get acquainted with girls. The guy may not be handsome, but if he takes care of himself and dresses well, this is a plus for him. It can even smooth out some of the flaws in his figure.

What do women think about male appearance?

In principle, girls, of course, pay attention to appearance, but they do not attach as much importance to it as men do. And if you ask if the appearance of a girl is important for a man, then, as a rule, nine out of ten guys will put this criterion in the first place. But with the fair sex, the situation will be just the opposite. It goes without saying that there are not so many guys who can be called beautiful, but there is nothing wrong with that either. Usually such men choose the modeling business and do not always prefer communication with the opposite sex. That is why many girls have long decided for themselves that a guy should be a little prettier than a monkey. I'm exaggerating a little here, of course.

At all, it is impossible to say with absolute certainty that the appearance of a man is not important for a woman. Firstly, all ladies are different, and some really prefer handsome men. And secondly, longing in female heart for beautiful and strong shoulder is still present. Therefore, a handsome macho, of course, attracts ladies' attention. And she will not even refuse to spend the night with him, but it is unlikely to build a relationship. Here, completely different criteria come to the fore: self-confidence, success, an interesting personality, a sense of humor, and others, really masculine qualities. For comparison, I can say with confidence that five out of ten men are ready to marry a dumb and eccentric beauty.


A woman will never leave a man for a more beautiful opponent if he is a smart, charismatic and self-confident person. Here it can change, but it is unlikely to leave. But in both cases, you need to seriously mess up.

Does a person's appearance matter: common problems

Next, I will analyze a few banal situations that are found everywhere, and often ruin people's lives; and they are connected with the same question - is your appearance important to a man.
  • A man meets a girlfriend who is younger than him, not by a year or two, but by five, ten and even fifteen. Over time, he develops a complex about his appearance - whether she will go to another who is younger and looks better. Here is one mistake after another. Firstly, if you have such a relationship, then she definitely didn’t choose you because of your appearance. Many young ladies want confidence in tomorrow, want to be taken care of, and therefore their peers walk by. And if she chose you, and you are fifteen years older than her, then definitely not because of her appearance - well, if not only because of her wallet. Secondly, if you yourself agreed to such a relationship, then be prepared for what they can lead to. If an eighteen-year-old person really loved you with all her heart, then there are no questions. Except for one thing - can an eighteen-year-old really fall in love? .. One piece of advice. If everything is fine with you and you are dating, then it is important that she continues to appreciate and respect you. And so that she is not disappointed in her choice, it is better to immediately abandon teenage habits, for example, fill up her SMS, call drunk, be jealous of every pole or wait at the entrance. After all, she was looking for a self-confident and accomplished man, and not an overgrown boy.
  • Sometimes guys are faced with such a problem as whether appearance is important to a girl. It just happens that you meet a beauty, and she is just fixated on her appearance, constantly spinning at the mirror, picks up outfits in stores and only talks about it. What to do in this case? Never mind. This behavior is obvious from the start. And if you married such a person, and therefore found out about it, then I will be very surprised. Although no, you, like many, believed that everything would change, and your love would make a person out of her. Remember - you can't change anyone. By the tenth grade, people have almost completely formed as individuals. Men are still being formed by the army, but such a school of life has not been invented for girls. And because her mother and the street brought up, with such you and live.

  • Well, the last question from the topic is whether the guy's appearance is important - in order to finally close it. I am often asked what to do if you meet with really beautiful girl? What if they take her away, all the beauties are always full of admirers and the guys stick to them. Besides, why did she choose me?.. Let's start with the last one. If she chose you, then it was for what. Therefore, there is no need to ask too many questions.. And if you start digging into your relationship, then she will really think - why did I choose him, such a fool? .. Will the beauty be taken away. In fact, there are far fewer people running after your friend than you think. And all because all the guys have stereotyped thinking, and they think the same way as you. They are simply afraid to approach them, because they believe that such girls are not for them, but for those who have a cool car and a lot of money in their account. And instead of coming up, they leave it for later, they say, I’ll save some money, dress up, take a better car or move from my parents. In short, a cloud of complexes.
So let's sum it up. Is appearance important for a pickup artist to successfully seduce girls? It is important, but it is far from the first place. Read my article "How to create yourself?" and then it will be enough for you just to have good haircut and look neat, you can even stylish. And everything else is already done by your masculine qualities and pickup skills.
If you want to know even more secrets to seduce girls

How handsome do you have to be to successfully capture women? Do you need to have the proverbial square jaw... amazing blue eyes... an athletic figure ... a height of one meter ninety? Of course not. Believe me, in such a matter as meeting women, an attractive appearance is by no means a factor of paramount importance.

Men are convinced of the opposite, because it is extremely important for them how a woman looks. But women are different from men. The personality of a man is of much greater interest to them than his appearance. Of course, all this does not mean that impressive beauty will not help you in meeting women. A spectacular man is really able to attract the attention of a woman. And yet, the personal qualities of a man interest a woman much more than his face and figure ... Women do not fall for cute faces with the same ease as men do. Millions of men are able to marry a mentally retarded girl if she has the face and figure of a Las Vegas dancer. However, women don't do that.

Gayle: If a guy tries to get to know me properly, I'm always willing to listen. Only by talking to him will I be able to tell if I like his appearance. My chosen one does not have to look like Adonis. If I like his way of speaking and what he says, I have an interest in him. I react to the person, not to their appearance.

Since it was about male beauty, I would like to tell you about Tom, my friend, who no one will call handsome. He is a very witty guy, but he is clearly out of luck with his appearance. He says to himself that he looks like a cross between a benevolent gorilla and a wise old toad. However, this appearance did not prevent him from marrying Laura - one of the most charming brunettes I have ever seen. This story took place three years ago when Tom was a swimming instructor at a boys' summer camp somewhere in the Berkshire Mountains.

He expected the summer to be amazing. The owner of the camp filled his head with fantasies about pretty teachers who were allegedly famous for literally raping swimming instructors. But all these hopes were not justified. During the four weeks spent in the mountains, Tom did not meet a single girl. He was terribly bored and suffered from loneliness. Cool starry nights seemed made for love. However, my friend had no idea where to find the girl.

On one of his rare free evenings, Tom borrowed a car from someone and drove to Pittsfield, a small town that was not far from the camp. By eleven o'clock its streets were already deserted. Tom walked past the city's only cinema. From there, the spectators came out. He remarked in the crowd unbelievably pretty girl nineteen or twenty years old. She was with her parents. By mobilizing all your courage. Tom approached this family and asked where the nearest decent cafe was. It turned out that these people were going to eat ice cream themselves. They suggested that Tom follow them. When Tom entered the ice cream parlor, the family was already sitting at the table. Tom looked longingly at these people, hoping that they would invite him to join them. However, they only waved to him and began to eat ice cream. Tom sat alone at the counter. They must have found me too ugly, he said to himself. “My face can ruin their appetite.” However, after raising his head after a while, he noticed that the girl was looking at him. She blushed slightly and quickly looked away. "Damn it," thought Tom, "if only she was alone!" Then he would try to get to know her. Tom thought about his work, about half the summer spent in a boring mountain camp. If he doesn't find a girlfriend soon, he'll just go crazy. Don't care if she's with her parents!

My friend got up and walked over to their table. “Look,” he said, “I know I may sound crazy to you, but I'm dying of boredom at a boys' camp where I work as a swim instructor. If I don't talk to new people soon, I'll drown at least a dozen of my charges. You can save their lives if you let me join you." These people gladly invited Tom to their table. They even apologized for not doing it sooner. The family turned out to be wonderful. The girl's father was a biology professor at Princeton University, and her mother was a violinist. The girl herself was a freshman at New York University. They owned a lake house a few miles from the town and spent their summers there.

Tom and the girl immediately found mutual language. He enjoyed talking to her. After about half an hour, the parents said they were going home to go to bed. "Would you mind letting Claire down?" they asked. Tom almost jumped up from the table to throw himself into a dance of joy. He went with the girl to a roadside bar for a drink. Claire was not only beautiful, but also possessed some special charm. Tom was captivated by her femininity, restrained coquetry and softness.

[Well, yes, of course!.. The delightful 19-year-old brunette had a free evening… A rare alignment!.. Maybe strict upbringing does not allow her to go to the cinema without family supervision? .. Parents are so tirelessly engaged in raising a girl that, like pimps, they put her in a car at midnight with a terrible unfamiliar man ... It’s a pity they forgot to offer half the kingdom for their “beauty” ... The author ruined the fairy tale ... In fact the appearance of a man is not important only for that girl, for whom her own appearance does not matter. If you strongly lose to a girl in appearance and style of clothing, then you should hardly count on a too warm and cordial reaction from her side ... In real conditions, if handsome guy when meeting a beautiful girl, she will talk nonsense, talk nonsense or be rude, the girl will say that she could not refuse him, because he was very eloquent ... And on the contrary, if an unattractive man gets acquainted gallantly and interestingly, the woman will refuse him on the grounds that there’s nothing to talk about with him at all ... But don’t be upset if you don’t come out face and body! Appearance is also clothing that can work wonders for professional approach. At the practical pickup trainings of the Academy of Dating with the use of special equipment, you will learn not in words, but in deeds how to effectively conduct acquaintances and dates, and how to adjust your image in order to make the most favorable impression on women.]

Claire told Tom that the summer was awfully boring. At first, she was glad that she could goof off... wallow in the sun all the time. But now she didn't know what to do with herself. The girl admitted that she was very glad to meet them ... When Tom took her home, she invited him to come in. They started kissing. Tom reached under Claire's blouse and found no bra. The young man nearly passed out with joy. However, Claire didn't let him sleep with her. “Listen,” she said, “I really like you. You are very nice. I want to see you soon. Nothing will happen between us today - in this case, you will definitely return at least to sleep with me. I'm right, right?" Claire smiled. He had to agree with her. He knew that he would return to this girl.

Tom began to spend all his free evenings with Claire. They became lovers. This girl firmly "hooked" him. It looks like he's intrigued her somehow. Maybe it was their ugly appearance? .. When the summer ended, they stayed together. A few months later, Tom married Claire. If you saw them wedding photo, then they would probably ask themselves: “Lord, what did she find in him?” Why not the story of Beauty and the Beast?

Here we will touch on one of the most burning topics - is our appearance important for a man at all?

Very often we pore over our face for a long time, draw, powder, paint and blush, but for some reason we don’t always get the result we expected.

Yes, and many of us can recall a couple of stories where handsome guy was fond of an unattractive ugly woman, then married her and did not even look at the side.

Or, for example, you are in the company of men. You get your portion of attention, and then a far from pretty woman appears, and all the attention of men in a strange way switches to her.

And you stand and resent, well, what did they find in her ?!

Has it happened?

And here's another interesting fact. In one of the programs, several experiments were conducted with men.

In the first case, five men met one woman in turn. Each was given 10 minutes to charm her. At the end, they had to remember some details of her clothes, make-up, hair and other things.

Four out of five guessed almost nothing!

But if a man’s appearance is so important, then he would certainly remember at least some details.

And another experiment was carried out: the same girl changed various elements in clothes, hairstyle, makeup and went out to several men. The same, not communicating with each other, should have noticed the changes.

As a result - the same result as in the first case - men noticed almost nothing.

But how is it? We try so hard, don't they care what we look like?

But what do they pay attention to then?

After all, it is not for nothing that there is a saying: "A man loves with his eyes."

So, after all the experiments, men were asked about what is important to them in our appearance? What do they fall for when they first meet?

Are you ready to hear the answer?

Men pay attention to the general image of a woman.

Surely some of you have guessed this?

When a man sees a woman, he immediately looks at her whole: how harmonious her clothes, makeup, hairstyle are.

That is, if you are wearing grandmother's faded wide skirt, and on top of the great-grandmother's family jacket with the smell of mothballs, and unwashed hair on your head for several days, it doesn’t matter at all that you have a very beautiful classic young face and perfect makeup.

Or another option: you are dressed fashionably and elegantly, outwardly very attractive, but when you walk, you wave your arms, grunt nervously and stoop a lot. In this case, there is also little chance of liking a man.

But you can, for example, be dressed discreetly, tastefully, in cheap clothes, light natural make-up, beautifully styled hair, be fresh and natural. And men will stare at you, seeing you off and "stacking in stacks."

A harmonious, beautiful and natural image is what is required of a woman. And it doesn't matter at all if you forgot to do a manicure or forgot to put eye shadow on your eyelids.

They are such men.

But what is even more interesting is that all this is also not the most important thing for starting a serious relationship.

Of course, for the first impression, a beautiful and well-groomed image is simply necessary, but in the future you start playing by different rules.

Just imagine, it's incredible beautiful woman: well-groomed healthy hair, perfect skin, huge luminous eyes, figuring stunning, dressed in the latest collections of eminent designers.

Men turn their necks after her, ready to be the first to serve at her slightest desire, blush from her playful look.

In general, such a cute picture of an ideal woman.

And now, she finally chooses one of the lucky ones, who seems ready to die of happiness.

He flies after her on the wings of delight, they sit down at the table, the waiter brings expensive wine and then ...

They start to get to know each other better...

It turns out that the girl is very narrow-minded. Laughing for any reason and for no reason. He talks about things he doesn't understand at all. And to everything else, expresses a clear interest in his financial situation.

The man is surprised, discouraged. In his head there is a discrepancy between her unearthly beauty and complete emptiness in his head.

If this is not a cool oligarch who just needs this one in order to show friends, partners and funds mass media then he thinks.

Not right away…

First, he will try to get to know her better, to meet again. It will be difficult for him to believe that God has deprived this treasure of such an important component as the mind.

But as you understand, after a while, a man's pink glasses, he is surprised to discover that the girl is not at all attractive, that she has a completely ordinary appearance and that he is unbearably bored with her.

When they part, everyone will be terribly surprised how he could leave such beauty. But in the life of this girl, such situations will be repeated over and over again, until she is taken into the hands of a person who only needs a picture.

And of course, there will be no talk of love, happiness, tenderness, mutual understanding.

And, accordingly, the opposite story: an unattractive and inconspicuous girl. Guys do not look after her, do not follow her eyes. And in general, they hardly notice her.

She meets a man as a friend, as a comrade-in-arms, perhaps doing a common job.

They meet and talk. Discuss interesting topics. The man calmly looks into her eyes and his heart is calm.

Gradually, he notices with surprise that the girl is very interesting, that she knows a lot, there is something to talk about with her, and most importantly, to laugh. She is original, she does not go into her pocket for a word, she has a sense of humor and also likes to watch football. Surprisingly, they even support the same team. They have so much in common.

And then the moment comes when the man notices that the girl is very sweet, she has beautiful kind eyes, a charming smile and the skin of her hands is so soft and velvety.

And now he already sees a beauty in her, his heart beats drums, taking him to the world of love experiences and dreams.

They get married, they are happy, and everyone around is surprised, well, how could such a handsome guy marry this "ugly woman". And the guy is surprised that someone might not like his sweetheart.

Feel the difference?

So what is the "dog rummaged" here?

Well, firstly, we are again talking about the harmony of the image. That is, it is necessary that the signals of your body and your consciousness coincide. Be beautiful both outside and inside.

Well, you see, it doesn't fit. Evening Dress and a breathtaking hairstyle with obscenities and spitting under everyone's feet!

And your spiritual beauty in dirty jeans and disheveled hair is also quite difficult to discern.

Well, and secondly, as you understand, your inner light illuminates everything around, refracting your shortcomings and shortcomings.

Beauty is an extremely relative concept. Someone loves thin ones, someone goes crazy from donuts. And there are those who have always loved the thin, but smitten with warmth and beauty, fell in love with a plump woman without memory.

Is our appearance so important to a man?

Yes and no.

Appearance without your spiritual qualities is completely uninteresting. Unless for short-term and quick meetings.

Golden spiritual qualities in an abandoned and littered body are also unlikely to inspire anyone, because first you need to turn your attention to the girl, become interested in her. And if it looks like last year's potatoes, then who will look for raisins in it? After all, you don’t want to “get to know” an untidy, slovenly man who smells terribly of dirty clothes and an unwashed body?

Although, there are chances and exceptions in the first and second cases.

So, to summarize all of the above:

1. Be neat. Don't dress too ostentatiously or too shabbily. Even in inexpensive and simple clothes, you can look elegant and beautiful. Too naked body will not leave room for the male imagination. Bright makeup can hint to a man that you are working somewhere on the expanses of Russian roads, earning your daily bread with your beautiful body.

2. Be natural. Be who you are: direct, sweet, with your fears and dreams, with your interests and plans for life. When you are relaxed and not pinched, then your energy circulates harmoniously, affecting the man favorably. He may not see the "raisin", but he will definitely feel it with his fibers of a subtle soul.

3. Be interesting. Show him your broad outlook. You must be interested together. Of course, it is good when there is something to be silent about with a person, but it is equally important to talk about something that will be interesting to both of you. Read more, watch, learn poetry, be interested in his dreams and plans.

4. Open your soul to him. Do not hide your blessed "spiritual distances" from his attentive eyes. Show how kind, sweet, funny, restless, extraordinary, elusive as the wind, gentle as a forget-me-not are you. Let him catch your subtle scent, let the aura of your heart touch the strings of his heart. And when your energy waves are intertwined into a single whole, then nothing can separate you. And appearance will go to the farthest plan, because from that moment on you will be irresistibly drawn to each other.

Ekaterina Meshcheryakova for the site

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