The child at the time of falling asleep sees terrible dreams. Too strict upbringing. Why do children dream and where do nightmares come from
What are scary dreams?
Most often, nightmares are dreamed of by children of three to five years. Although scary dreams- Well, a very unpleasant thing, in fact, they are not at all dangerous. Moreover, such dreams help us cope with fears, make friends with our emotions, learn to control ourselves. Dreams never just happen. They are our helpers.
A kid who has a nightmare most often does not remember it in the morning. This means that the brain has completely “digested” the necessary information. But it also happens that the child woke up screaming at night and excitedly talks about the dream in the morning and does not forget about it. Then he needs the support and help of his parents to deal with his sleep. This can be in the form of a discussion, a story or a game. small child we must learn to calmly treat our own terrible fantasies.
Why do children have scary dreams?
Psychologists have long come to the conclusion that dreams help us "digest" the events that happened during the day (especially if it's something frightening). And during sleep, the baby, as it were, becomes a witness to the work of the very mechanisms that “sort out” what happened during the day.
What are terrible dreams?
1. "household" dreams. Events are easily traced in them. real life, albeit in a fairy tale. For example, a father scolded his son for taking his tie. At night, the boy dreamed of the Serpent-Gorynych, who was chasing his brother Ivanushka, because he stepped on his tail. Such a dream helps the boy cope with resentment towards his father and feelings of guilt in front of him.
2. "deep" dreams. These dreams cannot be easily deciphered. They help children adapt to change, to growing up, and psychological problems(offense, unfair punishment). Sometimes "deep" dreams can indicate that the baby is getting sick. Our brain instantly begins to process with the help of dreams any changes that occur to the body.
Perinatal psychologists believe that sometimes nightmares heal a child from difficult experiences that he encountered during childbirth.
What should I do if my child is having nightmares?
1. Before talking about what happened during the day. If the baby is restless, try to find out what worries him, support him. It is good if the child falls asleep with a sense of security and safety. It is also important that if the baby is excitable, takes everything to heart, then, most likely, reading before going to bed will not do him any good. Look for something that will help your child sleep peacefully. Perhaps he should sing a song, light floating candles together, look at the constellations on the ceiling, take a soothing bath.
2. You can come up with a night “protector” - plush toy or flashlight. Then the baby will know that he has something that will protect him, and he will be less afraid.
3. If the baby screams in a dream, but does not wake up, do not wake up, but check if he can fall, get hurt. If you think it's safer this way, hold his hands. If he does not remember anything - do not raise this topic. And in general, you should not give too much sleep close attention. Otherwise, for a child, it can become a way of manipulating adults.
4. If the child is awake, turn on the light to show him that everything in the room is the same as before. Listen carefully. If the baby asks to go to bed with the parents, sometimes you can allow it.
5. Don't be scared yourself! The unconscious of a child is a powerful well-oiled mechanism that can be trusted. If it offers a symbolic plot for sleep, then the baby is ready to solve this problem. Therefore, one must trust what one dreams, even if it is something frightening or incomprehensible. In any case, if a child wants to talk about his dream, keep the theme of sleep, develop it.
6. If in the morning the child talks about a dream, but does not remember how it ended, you can come up with an end.
7. It is necessary to express the feelings of the child very clearly, to say: “You were afraid.” You can compose a fairy tale together, in which there are the most terrible episodes from a dream. It is best to play this fairy tale for real, “bodily” playing all the roles, and not just tell. When the baby acts as the author of a fairy tale, he takes control of fear and learns to cope with it. At the end of the tale, it is important to emphasize that the baby ( main character), having gone through all the adventures, remained safe and sound. This is especially important to emphasize if the dream is not “everyday”, but “deep”.
8. If it seems to you that the dream is “everyday”, you can safely offer the baby to redo and change the dream, make it safer. IN this case, this symbolizes his ability to overcome difficult situations from real life. But the same suggestion can be harmful if the dream is "deep".
Nightmares in children - how to forget?
It is believed that in order to forget an unpleased dream as quickly as possible (and also in order to bad dream did not come true), you need to look out, open the window and say - where the night is, there is a dream.
Why do babies have nightmares?
The sweet dream of a baby is a verbal stamp. Who sleeps more serenely and soundly than preschoolers, which of us, as adults, did not dream of getting back to the "session of children's dreams"? It seems that nightmares and a child are incompatible concepts, meanwhile, many kids aged 3-5 years old really suffer from terrible dreams.
Here is a small "dream book" of childhood nightmares that will help you figure out why the child does not sleep well at night!
From 3 to 7 - a difficult age when children separate from their mother and enter into independent life. Many new discoveries are also a lot of fears, fears and even phobias. Mom now can’t be around around the clock, and now monsters are settling under the bed, monsters are waiting on the street and in general, “what if mom dies?”.
” Psychologists say that more than half of preschoolers suffer from nightmares, which means that the problem is much more common than you might think.
Children's nightmares have the most different character. Here are some typical dreams.
The monster has come
"Monsters" and monsters rarely settle exclusively in the dreams of a child, most often they have prototypes (fabulous, cartoon) and also live in the closet, closet and under the bed.
Contrary to popular belief, it is very rare for the appearance of "monsters" to be the hero of a cartoon or a computer game. Usually the child feels real aggression, a threat - from family members, a nanny, an educator in kindergarten or a playmate and, unable to formulate his feelings, embodies them in free and involuntary fantasies.
” Tip: If your child has dreams about monsters on a regular basis, try to identify patterns in their occurrence. Maybe it happens after he spends the whole day with the nanny or you are in Once again Were you visiting a particular family?
I will eat you!
A variety of dreams about monsters are dreams about bloodthirsty animals. Sometimes they are so real that the kid even claims that he was really bitten by a huge dog, although there are no injuries on the body, and you cannot remember when such an episode could have occurred.
The fact that you protected the baby from aggressive images in cartoons and computer games, does not mean that he is unfamiliar with them. Angry dogs, toothy lions in a zoo, nimble crocodile in a wildlife movie - it's easy to meet a model of aggression.
” Tip: By the way, sometimes a child does not project his fears onto familiar images at all, but is really afraid of a large and loud dog that lives with neighbors. In any case, you need to find out the source of fear and either protect the baby from it, or show that he is fearless and harmless.
Fall from the roof
Many children fly in their dreams, but sometimes a pleasant and joyful dream about flying turns into a nightmare about falling from a roof, from a ladder, from a window.
Oddly enough, these nightmares can have a completely treatable cause, such as low-grade otitis media. A number of diseases manifest themselves in problems with the vestibular apparatus, and a deterioration in the sense of balance, in turn, is reflected in such nightmares. Usually in such dreams, the emphasis is precisely on the moment of the fall - sometimes the baby even falls out of bed in a dream.
Psychologically, such dreams symbolize the loss of control. Perhaps in the life of the baby there were some drastic changes, and now it seems to him that he has lost his usual support in the face of mom and dad.
” Tip: Try to make the changes in the baby's life come gradually, always pronounce the upcoming changes. For example, if you refused babysitting services and sent your child to kindergarten, take not a couple of days, but a month for this process. Let the child still spend some days with the nanny, and at first stay in kindergarten for a few hours.
Chase dreams
A kind of falling dreams are dreams that the child is lost, lost, or is fleeing from a pursuer (although they no longer have anything to do with the vestibular apparatus).
This is another subconscious experience. unpleasant situation. If the child does not see aggression directed directly at himself, but understands that the situation is developing in an unfavorable way (for example, parents are getting divorced, and everyone is paying even more attention to the child than usual), then he reacts to this with similar dreams. Own helplessness in the face of a vague, non-specific threat is a rather unpleasant feeling!
” Tip: Often adults try to protect the baby from unnecessary worries, do not tell him about the upcoming divorce, or the illness and death of someone close. But this only complicates the problem - not understanding the situation, not knowing its consequences, the child is only more afraid.
naked dreams
Dreams in which you find yourself naked or inappropriately dressed in a public place are also seen by many adults. And, like adults, they most often do not have sexual overtones.
The child is so afraid of not merging into a new environment - often these dreams appear when entering a kindergarten, musical or sports school, they also appear in first graders. Perhaps he gained some kind of unpleasant experience - he did not make new friends in the kindergarten (and you promised him that other children would play with him there!), Or he is afraid of failure during public speaking.
” Tip: Do not promise your child something that you cannot fulfill yourself, for example, that all children will be friendly and ready to play with him. Better explain that in kindergarten everything will be the same as on the playground - the child will be able to choose comrades and offer them new game or participate in their entertainment.
Battle with childhood nightmares
If your child sleeps restlessly, screams and cries in his sleep, and even more so if he complains of nightmares, you need to help him cope with his fears. What can be done besides the tips above?
First, explain that sleep can't hurt and cannot be realized in real life. The child still does not very clearly understand the line between reality and his own fantasy, which is often underestimated by moms and dads.
Second, "lose" nightmare: draw a monster, build a labyrinth out of cubes. This exercise in itself is very useful, because the realized nightmare often turns out to be much less terrible than the vague image suggested by the subconscious.
Thirdly, “defeat” the nightmare: come up with a fairy tale about a monster, add funny details to it, make it kind. Find a way out of the labyrinth or destroy the walls in it. By the way, if the neighbor's dog is only formidable in appearance, but in fact it is the sweetest creature that loves children, introduce the child to it, avoiding close contact. Let the owner demonstrate, for example, how smart and quick-witted the dog is, following his commands.
And we wish all the kids a good night!
How to help a child who has nightmares and horror stories? Why does a child have bad dreams?
What are nightmares, most children learn after the age of three years. The most common cause of nightmares is a feverish reaction of the body. If the child is healthy, the causes of nightmares can be in intense (for this age) intellectual activity, in a large psycho-emotional load; the brain is overtired, and the subconscious reacts in the form of a nightmare.
Another one possible reason nightmares - trouble in the family; if parents, preoccupied with the intricacies of their own relationships and not paying attention to the presence of the child, arrange noisy proceedings (simply speaking, scandals), if these proceedings take place often, the child may well begin to be tormented by nightmares.
It is also impossible to exclude the possibility of nightmares in a baby whom mom or dad is raising in excessive severity - they organize total control over him, “tighten the nuts” in every possible way, do not disdain education with a belt, etc. Nightmares can visit a child who is allowed to watch television programs not according to the age; It's no secret that some masterfully crafted "horror" films, which often use the surprise effect, in which one monster is scarier than another, scare adults too.
A child who is tormented by nightmares sleeps restlessly, tosses about in bed; he wakes up in the middle of the night wet with sweat, he screams and cries in fear, he seeks support, protection and calls for mom or dad. Of course, at this time, one of the parents should be near the baby, should calm him down. As a rule, the child quickly calms down if, upon waking up, he finds his mother near him, if he feels her gentle touches, hears her gentle voice. Two or three sips of warm sweet tea (warm and sweet has a certain calming effect) can help. If the baby has frequent nightmares, the mother can keep a warm infusion of valerian root or a warm infusion of five-lobed motherwort herb ready; these drugs have a pronounced sedative effect, improve the quality of sleep. Giving the child a few sips to drink sedative, the mother should ask the baby to tell about what fears he had. According to psychologists, children, having spoken out their fears, usually cease to be afraid. Mom will help the child a lot if she laughs at his fears, without making fun of the baby himself; and it’s better if they laugh at the fears they dreamed of together. Until the reassured child falls asleep again, the mother should sit nearby; she can hold his hand, she can tell him a story (without negative characters), she can sing a lullaby.
How to help a child who has nightmares, bad dreams
A child who, for one reason or another, often has nightmares needs special treatment from mom and dad, from other adult family members. First of all, all factors that could cause nightmares should be excluded: peace and tranquility should reign in the family; handling the baby - only affectionate and precautionary; mom and dad should be very critical of the methods of education they resorted to - perhaps among these methods there are those that should be abandoned; it is important to pay attention to the television programs that the baby watches; if there are other children in the family, it is recommended to pay attention to the relationship of these children with the baby (do they scare the baby out of mischief?).
For a child suffering from nightmares, in addition, arrangements should be made healthy lifestyle life: strictly adhere to the correct daily routine, regularly take long walks on fresh air, do not overload the child in terms of intellectual activity (work with the child on a schedule and strictly dosed), do not allow too active games before bedtime, organize for the baby proper nutrition; in connection with the latter, we must say that a child who has eaten his fill before going to bed, who has eaten heavy meat, fatty foods, is at great risk of seeing nightmares (from the point of view of physiological science, this is simply explained: digestive system forced to work all night, signals from the digestive system to the central nervous system disturb the brain, and the anxious subconscious responds with frightening visions); to reduce the likelihood of nightmares, do not feed the child before bedtime and the child's dinner should be light.
In the fight against nightmares, mother and baby will also be helped by a certain upbringing of the subconscious, which in this case we can call suggestion. Mom must constantly and confidently tell the child that he is already big and strong, that he is fearless and can accomplish many feats; mother should compare the baby with his loved ones fairy tale characters and say that he is very similar to these heroes. When a child truly believes in this, there will be no trace of nightmares ...
Content:
Night terrors are non-physiological sleep disorders. This is the release of experiences associated with meaningless events or situations. Usually, nightmares last for minutes, sometimes seconds. Regardless of the duration, their action extends far beyond the dream, affecting daily life. A person of any age can become a victim of nightmares. But most often, restless images interfere with children's sleep.
A child who often has nightmares becomes more nervous in the evening, afraid to be alone and sleep with the lights off. Waking up from a nightmare, he can't sleep. Feelings of constant anxiety and lack of sleep - all this can result in serious problems with mental and physical health.
Why do children have scary dreams?
Nightmares can be caused by physiological factors such as mental illness, disorders of the brain or nervous system. common cause restless sleep are worms and fever.But it happens that the child is physically healthy, but terrible dreams still do not recede. In this case, it is worth paying attention to family relationships. Indeed, often the parents themselves create conditions favorable for the appearance of terrible dreams.
Situations that provoke the appearance of nightmares:
How to help your child get rid of nightmares?
- Children have a hard time with nightmares. They cannot get the frightening images out of their heads on their own. Therefore, in no case should you leave the child alone with his anxieties. It is necessary to ask him to tell what he had a dream about and why this dream frightened him so much, to try to find the cause of a terrible dream (a movie watched the day before, a domestic quarrel, disagreement with peers).
- Often nighttime images linger in childhood memories for a long time. In such cases, the child is faced with the fear of going to bed every night. The task of parents in this case is to make the process of falling asleep as comfortable and calm as possible. Shortly before sleep, it is advisable to turn off the TV and computer, dim the lights and start talking quieter and calmer.
- You can sit next to the child while he falls asleep, tell a fairy tale in which scary situations and characters in the end turn out to be not so scary. Psychologists often use the technique to make their fears funny, and therefore not scary. You can adopt a method from their arsenal - drawing fear. To do this, you need to invite the child to draw what scares him, and then draw features that will make the image funny and harmless.
Nightmares It is a fairly common problem among children and teenagers. According to various sources, it worries from 2 to 11% of all children. It is imperative to deal with nightmares in a child, as they interfere with good performance, normal mental development, drive the child into a state of fear, depression and depression. What are the criteria for nightmares, how to identify the fact of their presence?
Nightmares- These are recurring episodes in which the child experiences a feeling of fear and anxiety. At the same time, the baby can jump up in bed with screams, crying, wide-eyed, but at the same time react poorly to the environment. Usually, it is difficult to get an explanation of the cause of fear from a child; he also cannot remember and describe a dream.
In more serious cases there is a so-called night terror"when a child tosses about in bed, groans or screams in a dream, while waking him up is very difficult. Nightmares and "night terror" may be accompanied by sweating, rapid heart rate, and rapid breathing.
So, for what featured can you accurately establish that the child is tormented by nightmares? These include:
- frequently repeated abrupt awakening with a feeling of anxiety and fear, usually in the first third of the night;
- disability in children younger age remember a dream or the cause of fear, adolescents cannot fully retell the dream;
- it is a reliably known fact that nightmares are not associated with taking any medication;
- it is very difficult to wake up a child at the moment of a nightmare, and when he wakes up, he is poorly oriented in the environment.
Causes of nightmares in children
Why at all children do you have nightmares? Finding the answer to this question can be difficult even for conscientious parents. Sometimes you can only guess about the presence of nightmares in a child, especially for young children who do not even know how to speak yet.
First of all, it is clear that any psychological trauma can cause the appearance of nocturnal. One of these traumas may be a situation that was accompanied by a fear of death ( surgery, car accident, watching a horror movie, etc.). Another reason is the unfavorable situation in the family. This may include frequent quarrels or divorce, excessively strict upbringing, rude or cruel treatment with family members. Often nightmares are caused by overwork, if the child does too much mental or physical activity sitting at the computer or in front of the TV. A factor predisposing to the appearance of nightmares in children, even early age, is the loss of strong contact with the mother in the first years of life. In this case, the baby feels defenseless and helpless, becomes especially vulnerable. For the same reason, do not limit the child's communication with peers. In the company of friends, he feels the support of the same children.
However causes of nightmares have not only psychological roots, sometimes it can be various organic diseases. For example, shortness of breath, fever, disruption of the cardiovascular system, complete bladder can provoke the appearance of fear and anxiety at night. plays a special role here nervous system which is still imperfect in children. Over time, when its formation is completed, nightmares most often leave the child, and if they bother, then very rarely.
What to do when a child has nightmares?
If you understand that to kid having nightmares, above all, never lose your temper. Even if you ran in horror to the wet bed screaming child and with difficulty they woke him up, you should not show your emotions to the baby. You must calmly and confidently convince him that nothing really terrible and dangerous has happened.
Again see list of reasons, which may cause nightmares, and carefully analyze if you have experienced similar situations. Accordingly, it is necessary to deal with them fundamentally: to restore contact with the child, to regulate relations in the family, to limit the time spent at the computer and watching TV, to allow the baby to rest more, to normalize the daily routine. Diseases also need to be treated. internal organs which can cause nightmares. Most often these are adenoids, rhinitis, arrhythmias, enuresis and others. Also try to limit outdoor games, avoid strong emotional stress just before bedtime.
Probably overkill speak that during such periods the child especially needs the support of parents, the feeling that they are always there. Therefore, put the child to sleep on his own and do not leave him alone until he falls asleep. You can also try to discuss with the baby his bad dream, try to "decipher" it. Draw a nightmare with your child, and then make it funny and ridiculous. The drawing can be torn into small pieces, letting the child know that the nightmare is actually destroyed.
Helps many children in the fight against nightmares phytotherapy. Before going to bed, you can give your child a warm decoction, lemon balm, calendula, motherwort and other herbs that have a slight sedative effect. You also need to walk more often with the child in the fresh air and make sure that he does exercises regularly.
The doctor prescribed Anvifen for nightmares
Sometimes nightmares still, they do not leave, and parents are forced to turn first to a psychologist, and then to other specialists. In such a situation, children are prescribed the medicine Anvifen. Of course, there must be good reasons for this, because this drug is a real antidepressant that affects the functioning of the nervous system. Anvifen belongs to a group of nootropic drugs that are distinguished by their ability to improve cognitive functions. It has an anticonvulsant effect and improves cerebral circulation, due to which the nervous system begins to work more productively. This helps to normalize the child's sleep, get rid of feelings of anxiety and fear. The course reception of Anvifen helps to increase mental performance, concentration, physical activity and improving memory.
Relative to other drugs with a similar mechanism of action Anvifen has less side effects. At the first doses, drowsiness, irritability and headache. Possible side effects gastrointestinal tract: nausea and allergies. It is important to strictly observe the dosage prescribed by the doctor; of course, it is impossible to take Anvifen on your own without prior consultation with a specialist.
