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How to win the trust of a man or guy. How to establish trust

How to win a guy's trust

Trust is a very fragile and ephemeral substance, especially in a relationship between a man and a woman. He can trust you with all his secrets and at the same time follow your every step, or, on the contrary, let him go to any parties with friends or colleagues, but not share the problems and events of his life. However, trust is a strong cement that holds the union of a man and a woman together. So how do you win a guy's trust? I asked this question to almost all the men I know, from my father to my work colleagues. And that's what happened.

“He made himself respect…”

Put yourself in the shoes of the guy you want to trust. Whom will you trust yourself - someone you respect, be it a friend or a comrade. Therefore, you need to inspire respect in the first place. How to do it? Try to become one of the best in any area of ​​interest to him: sports, art, study or work.

If you become an authority for him, then he will at least begin to trust your opinion and begin to be interested in your judgment in contentious issues. This a good start. Then, if you behave correctly, he will begin to share more with you. In order for a guy to respect you, you also need to not seem like a frivolous "pied-haired dog", demonstrate your erudition and sense of humor in a timely manner and observe the following items this treatise.

Know how to listen

If you want to win the trust of a man, be able to listen. There are very few people in the world who do not like to talk about themselves. Unless spies or scouts. However, instead of letting a friend talk, most of us rumble about our conclusions and problems. Give the guy a chance to trust you with something.

Shut up! Become a psychotherapist for a while. Ask questions with interest and LISTEN to the answers, even if you are not particularly interested in the topic of the conversation. Look the interlocutor straight in the eye and insert your "special opinion" only if he asks for it. Try to keep the information that you have been told from becoming public. If you want to be trusted, keep it as a medical secret.

Do not lie!

Many women have bad habit- lie. Exaggerate, embellish, downplay or simply invent any story or fact from your life. Moreover, these innocent fantasies are absolutely meaningless and aimless and do not bring “ladies” any “dividends” in the eyes of “gentlemen”. If you want to win the respect and trust of a man, do not lie, especially over trifles. Everything secret sooner or later becomes clear and trust will be lost forever. As Kozma Prutkov said: “If you lie once, who will believe you.”

Help!

It is better to win the trust of a man not by word, but by deed. Heartfelt phrase: "You can trust me!" It doesn't always work, and it doesn't work for everyone. If you are serious about the projects and maxims of a man (or at least pretend to be) and help him in their implementation, then his trust in you is guaranteed. Believe in him, and he will dedicate all his victories to you. And then, knowing everything about the plans and thoughts of your boyfriend and being his main ally and confidant is worth a lot!

Trust is an ephemeral concept, it must be earned, and for some reason in relations between opposite sexes it is accepted that the man himself should try to do this. But there are many cases when it is he who does not trust his soulmate. There are many reasons for this, so girls should not blame themselves. Perhaps he was deceived former relationship and maybe he is on his own closed person. However, trust is the foundation for building a strong alliance, which is why it is so important to find out the causes of mistrust and try to eradicate them, acting carefully and carefully. How to win a man's trust? Here's what you need to know about men so that they trust you.

What you need to know about men to win their trust

1. Mistrust from the past. Once he was deceived - cruelly and painfully, which is why your man is afraid that he will be hurt again. Your task is to understand that the fault of his distrust lies not with you, which means that you should not blame yourself for anything. Just try to understand the situation and help your loved one overcome the consequences of the trauma inflicted on him. Just do not stir up the past, especially at the time of quarrels and conflicts, so you hurt his soul even more.

2. All troubles from the family. There is a high probability that he was not respected and offended in the family - parents, older brothers or sisters. He grew up as an indecisive person in himself, which negatively affects love relationships. It is very important to cultivate self-confidence in him, perhaps along with it there will be trust in someone who believes in him and appreciates him. The main thing is not to overpraise, but to praise for merit, flattery can cause the opposite result.

3. Freedom of choice. Distrustful people demand freedom, so try not to control it. Even such ordinary phrases: “How did you spend your day?” or “Are you busy at work again?” can plunge him into despondency about your distrust of him. But everyone knows that the ideal defense is an attack, respectively, you should not be trusted.

4. Trust must be earned. Regardless of what you really love, respect and appreciate your beloved, but his trust must be earned. Yes, it is very difficult, but if you want your man to be there, you must be full of determination and tolerance.

5. No dissatisfaction in the presence of others. If at least once in front of people who are an authority for your man, insult him or put him in an awkward position, then trust will come to an end. When you don’t like something, it’s better to talk about it later, in private.

6. Don't tolerate his antics. In no case do not allow him to manipulate your life or control you. He must understand that you have personal space, otherwise, over time, he will sit on your neck. And no one wants to trust a weak-willed person. Don't put your happiness second!

7. Be attentive to the requests of a man. If he asked you, for example, to arrive at a certain time at a restaurant, then please do not be late. This will offend him greatly. The same applies to his requests of a domestic nature - to wash his favorite shirt, which brings him good luck, which is so necessary before an important meeting, not to ask unnecessary questions when he watches the world football championship, etc. and much more. You won't win his trust otherwise.

8. Better deed not a word! If you constantly assure your loved one that he can trust you, you can get the opposite result. It is better to prove it by deed - take his projects seriously, ask about his plans and listen carefully to his stories, even if they are boring. Trust him and he will trust you.

So, in order to win the trust of a man, you must be patient, attentive and never rush things. Only after a while he will understand that you are worthy of his respect and love, because you will never betray him!

Most of the stronger sex cannot quickly open up to a woman and begin to trust her completely on initial stage relations. To win his trust, you have to for a long time communicate with him, always justifying his expectations and faith in you. So, there are several rules that you need to follow when communicating with your beloved man, to win his trust:
Always leave enough time to resolve disagreements
If you try to stop your partner on your way to work or call him during your lunch break, then there is a great chance of being left unsatisfied and unrecognized due to lack of time. If it's really important, then agree on a time when you can discuss the issue. Your attention to your partner's personal time will give you a certain credit of trust, which a man will show when discussing the problem.

Do not invent anything superfluous until you know the real facts
It's impossible to know exactly what's going on until you've actually heard it from your partner. Don't try to imagine what he thinks, just ask him directly. This will help save you a lot of trouble and avoid huge misconceptions taking up time that could be spent talking.
Be reliable and stick to your word
Do you say you will do something or be somewhere and then you don't do it or you can't do it? It may seem like a small offense, but you will still be subconsciously judged for it. It's always best not to promise to do something you're not sure you can handle.

Apologize if you're really at fault
Don't delay or try to shift the blame to someone else. If you broke a promise, said or did something wrong, it is up to you to apologize or compensate. Not only will you feel better about your ability to be more honest, but your partner will also learn to trust you, knowing your sense of responsibility.
Pause if the situation is heated to the limit
If you feel that you are starting to get angry - take a break for a few minutes, take a walk, listen to music, do something around the house to dispel the rage.
Do not sort things out in front of friends and relatives
You automatically alert your partner when you find out the main problems in the presence of other people. In addition, the disagreement, instead of being a personal issue, becomes public knowledge. Agree in advance that you will talk about what happened away from prying eyes and ears.
Always think about the interests of your man
When you make a decision or act in a certain way, do you think of other people's interests as well as your own interests? Most people pick up on this very quickly, even if they can't explain what's wrong with it.

Somehow it so happened that it was a man who should win the trust of his lady of the heart, but modern reality is such that now this issue also concerns women, given the spread of emancipation and feminism in the world. Now women are also deciding how to win the trust of a man. Install trusting relationship difficult and for this, in fact, there are few words about love and tenderness. Cohabitation in itself implies the presence of trust in each other, but what if it is lost?

How to win a man's trust

Reasons why men have lost confidence in women:

Men, like children in childhood, are afraid that they are being deceived all the time;

Often do not believe in sincere feelings women, they say, love is an illusion;

Frequent betrayals of women with other men;

Jealousy;

Complexes;

Relationship with mother

Not the ability and unwillingness to forgive.

7 ways to win your man's trust

First of all: no scenes of jealousy. Men cannot stand such scenes, tantrums and words of reproach. Think for a second, what if your suspicions are unfounded? Maybe you are wrong. Men are inherently polygamous, but that doesn't mean they have to cheat all the time;

If the situation is ripe and a serious conversation cannot be avoided, then do it at the right moment, and not “on the run to work”, while eating and certainly not during a football match. If you want to establish a trusting relationship, create conditions so that nothing distracts you from the topic of conversation and the atmosphere is conducive. Start a conversation from afar, give an example of other people and gradually lead to the question: “How are we?” or “What is going on with us?”;

To gain a man's trust, always try to be respectful of your partner. If you want respect from him, respect him too, especially since after a showdown, you will call each other again affectionate words;

Always be open about your feelings to him. Don't beat around the bush. Men are straight forward. Hints are not understood;

Do not interrogate with prejudice about his past. If necessary, he will tell everything himself. You are not a telepath and do not know how painful it is for men. If you want to establish a trusting relationship, don't be his next pain;

Try to be more interested in the plans of your chosen one. Not for control, but to do together and more of the work that you can do. This is a sign that a man can trust you and can rely on you;

Do not try to re-educate or change the chosen one. This is silly. Even before the age of seven, the main character traits are laid, so it's too late, and this is not your responsibility.

How to establish trust

Mutual distrust and lack of sincerity in a relationship can significantly spoil the relationship between a guy and a girl, if not kill this relationship altogether. Therefore, as soon as you understand that you have something to worry about when he is delayed, and he is distrustful of your absences to “walk with girlfriends” - it's time to save the sinking ship.

All incomprehensible moments need to be clarified, leaving no chance of uncertainty, because it is she who is the root of all problems. In addition, suspicion and jealousy are destructive in nature. However, as well as the banal lack of openness. Oddly enough, in Lately this is often the sin of men who have gone through the betrayal of their loved ones in the past. So it is you who will have to break through these walls.

To win a man's trust, always be sincere about your thoughts and emotions. Do not scandal and do not swear with him. Let me know if you feel anger, disappointment, dissatisfaction - be sure to calmly. In no case do not forget to indicate the reasons for such feelings and how the situation can be corrected. Important! Always communicate positive feelings, too, in detail. This is much more true than a compliment - and much more effective.

Open yourself. You should not count on the trust of a loved one if you yourself do not want to share anything that is outside the scope of your relationship. If you want to establish a trusting relationship, in no case try to control him, arrange interrogations with prejudice and similar scenes.

When a person is suspected of something, he is inclined to embody your fears in life, so as not to listen to accusations in vain. Sincere lack of suspicion on your part plus openness is a magic cocktail that will soften the heart of any incredulous man.

How to win the trust of a man if you started living together? Do not invade all spheres of his life, do not try to fill all his space with yourself. A man should feel that his little world is not in danger and destruction, capture and tear. If he is calm for the integrity of his life, he will trust you.

Distinguish him as a person, his character as opposed to his actions. Each of us can do something bad, but this does not make us bad by nature. If you want to establish trust, let him know that you love him and accept him for who he is, and actions can almost always be rethought and corrected (or, in last resort, learn a lesson).

This attitude speaks of devotion, and does not allow a man to perceive you as a controller or an opponent in front of whom you cannot make a mistake. And your loved one, having experienced this attitude on himself, is unlikely to go into deep protection.

When in a relationship, it is very important not to be afraid of your partner's reaction to expressing your frustration or disagreeing with him. It’s good when you have the opportunity to express your feelings without fear that your loved one may not like it.

For a long-term clarification of your differences, you need to make sure that you have enough time for this.

Do not try to figure out your relationship during telephone conversation, for example, in your own, and even more so your partner's lunch. You should also not call for explanations of your lover while he is in a hurry to work. Most likely, you will find yourself unrecognized and unsatisfied due to lack of time. If you stood in front of your couple important problem, then you need to agree with your partner on a time when it would be convenient for both of you to discuss the issue. Show attention and care for your man's personal time. This will increase confidence in you, and your man will not forget about it when discussing the problem.

Speak only the truth!

Do not build any illusions, until you hear the truth from your partner, you cannot know the whole reality of what is happening. Don't try to negotiate or think for him. Just ask about what is bothering you. This will help you avoid misunderstandings caused by misconceptions. Directness and honesty will save you from troubles and you will spend precious time for a fruitful conversation.

Don't bring the past into the present conversation.

To solve your problem, let your man feel that there really is a solution. By reminding your partner of the mistakes of the past, you let him know that no matter how much effort he makes to positively change something, he will still be to blame. Unpleasant memories of the past will not lead your partner and relationship to improve.

Sorry if you're wrong.

Don't try to shift the blame onto someone else. If you make a mistake, don't hesitate to apologize. Gather your strength and courage and apologize if you didn't keep your promise or did something you don't want to admit. You yourself will feel much better after the changes, and your soul will become easier. And your man will trust you even more, knowing about your responsibility and sincerity.

Pause.

If you feel that the situation is tense, then pause and rest before one of you breaks. Do something around the house, take a walk, just take your mind off your anger. Let your condensed rage subside a little.

Do not sort things out in front of strangers.

You should not start to sort out your relationship and the main problems in them with strangers, and even more so with friends. This automatically turns your man against you. Do not make your personal relationships and problems. Imagine yourself in the place of a partner. Will you really have an open and honest discussion in front of an audience? Be patient with clarifications and agree that you will discuss your problem without witnesses.

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Why do men take lovers

Why does a man ignore a woman?