Tips for introverts: How to survive in a big office and at a noisy party. How to live with an introvert if you are an extrovert: rules and valuable tips
So much has already been written and said about the complexities of the relationship between introverts and extroverts, a lot of research has been done, but meanwhile the problems of misunderstanding and conflicts based on different psychotypes have not gone away.
This article will not contain obscure terms and dry numbers - only practical advice and facts. I will try to briefly and clearly outline the main features and differences between the two types and how these differences affect everyday life.
So, first, you should dispel the myths about what an introvert is. For many, this is a shy, unsociable subject who never goes to parties, does not show his emotions, he has very few friends. Not the most attractive portrait, right? In fact, these are ordinary stereotypes that were formed due to a misunderstanding of the key principle: a way to replenish energy.
If an extrovert receives energy from outside world, then the introvert scoops it up inside himself.
Therefore, one should not be surprised, for example, that an introverted child would prefer to walk alone in the park, listening to his favorite music, and not go to the movies with a group of classmates.
Everything flows from the method of replenishing energy. key differences between extroverts and introverts and, of course, all subsequent problems of misunderstanding. So, let's start explaining ordinary situations that are not a problem for extroverts, but can cause negative emotions at an introvert.
1. Change of plans and dislike for surprises.
“And I have a surprise for you! Guests will come to us in the evening, ”the extrovert will say and, most likely, he will see genuine fear in the eyes of the introvert, which may be followed by a showdown. Due to the fact that the introvert draws energy from within, he needs to prepare himself for the fact that this internal reserve will be used up due to the upcoming party / trip / meeting with friends.
Any unplanned interference can throw an introvert off balance. Of course, life almost daily throws us “surprises” and not always pleasant ones, and it is obvious that we all, both introverts and extroverts, are learning to cope with this. However, if we take those situations that we can influence - in the family, in friendly relations- then here you can make life easier for both parties and warn in advance about the upcoming holiday, the arrival of guests, etc. Then the introvert will be calm, having planned the event in advance, and the extrovert will receive the expected joyful reaction, and not a dumbfounded face with fear in his eyes.
2. "Subscriber is temporarily unavailable"
Perhaps I will not be mistaken if I assume that it was the introvert who invented the answering machine. Surely, many are familiar with the situation when an acquaintance / friend / colleague does not pick up the phone and admits that he does not want to answer and talk on the phone. The most important thing is not to be offended and not to reproach the introvert, but to take this fact into account. If you really want to have a heart-to-heart talk with an introvert, then this conversation will be much more productive in person.
And if you just need to briefly know “how are you”, then here better fit sms or email. In any case, a telephone conversation is unlikely to be long and will not bring satisfaction to either side: an extrovert will feel that the interlocutor is trying to curtail the conversation, and an introvert will suffer, trying to overcome himself. Of course, the situation is not considered here when the call - the only way connections, my call is different - to often take the place of another person and try to understand him.
3. Unsociable loners.
One of the most common misconceptions is that introverts have no interest in people. Again, back to the way to replenish energy: due to the fact that the introvert accumulates it from the inside, he can waste it in limited quantity, so his network of contacts is usually not very extensive. In addition, a specific feature of an introvert is that he strives to ensure that his communication with people is as deep as possible, since superficial contacts and conversations “about the weather” are simply not interesting to him.
Such small talk can only take away the time and energy of an introvert and give nothing in return. Hence, by the way, the widespread idea that introverts dislike parties. Of course, it is more pleasant for them to spend several hours in face-to-face communication with an interesting interlocutor than to talk with ten people for twenty minutes. different people. Introverts are deeply attached in every way: for example, they choose friends for life, there are very few people they can call friends. As a rule, it is one or two people. You should try hard to make the introvert accept you into your circle of friends, but after that you can be sure that you have found the most faithful, reliable and constant friend who will not betray you under any circumstances. As the hero of one film said: "The main thing in this life is to find your own and calm down."
4. Soul - darkness
Everyone who has dealt with an introvert noticed that usually a person with such a psychotype listens much more than he speaks. This is not due to the fact that he has nothing to say or that he is not interested in the topic. Rather, this is due to the introvert's desire to analyze and "read" the interlocutor. And in fact for them inner work, thinking about what was said can be much more important than all the words spoken out loud. However, if you bring an introvert to a topic that is truly interesting to him, then you can see firsthand how talkative he can be when he "sits on his skate."
5. Little introverts
I think it is very important from childhood to explain and teach children to accept the differences between people. This will help to avoid ridiculous quarrels and teach the little person to live in harmony with other people and with himself. One of the most serious misconceptions of parents is that you can remake a child "for yourself." Alas, this is not so. Introversion-extroversion is as fundamental and unchanging a concept as temperament or DNA structure. Parents should listen very carefully and look closely at their baby in order to assess his inclinations, reaction speed, ways of interacting with other children.
Of course, it can be difficult for extrovert parents to admit that their child is completely different, that he is not happy with noisy companies and performances in front of classmates. Perhaps it will surprise them that he often just needs to read a book alone, and he cannot always immediately give an answer to a question, although he most likely knows it. It's just that he is different and has a set of completely different qualities, in particular the ability to concentrate, which can greatly facilitate the process of his training. And if parents can interest their introvert child in something, they will receive in his person an incredibly hardworking and very motivated student, because in terms of achieving the goal, the introvert has no equal: he, like a rocket aimed at the target, moves forward, despite what obstacles.
Summing up, I would like to say about the need to take into account the differences between psychotypes, because. this is a real-life given, and not a notion from the field of popular psychology. And, if we turn to our past experience, surely each of us will be able to remember many cases when it was these problems of misunderstanding between introverts and extroverts that caused conflicts or resentment. After all, we are not offended if foreigners do not understand us when we speak our own language. So in the case of introverts, it makes sense to take into account the existing differences and thus ensure comfortable communication and interaction.
And finally, I would like to wish all of us - introverts and extroverts - peace in the soul, harmony in relationships, respect for each other. In general, "guys, let's live together."
Sincerely, introvert Maria Ulitina
P.S. For those who are interested in this topic, I can offer several wonderful books:
2) “Introverts. How to use the features of your character ”Susan Kane.
3) "An introvert in an extrovert world." Elizabeth Romantseva.
Translator Natalia Zakalyk
Do you think you can spot an introvert in a crowd? Think again. While the stereotypical introvert may be one of those who will hang out with himself at a party, sitting at a table with an iPhone in his hands, any socialite can just as well be an introverted person.
Finding an introvert can be harder than finding Wally main character popular game Where's Wally?, says Sophia Dembling, author of The Introvert's Way: Living a Quiet Life in a Noisy World.
"Many introverts can pass themselves off as extroverts."
People often don't know they're introverts (especially if they're never shy about anyone) because they can't figure out that being an introvert is more than just being alone. Instead, it would be more reasonable to pay attention to whether they lose or, conversely, gain energy by being in a team, even if the company of friends brings them pleasure.
hidden introvert in modern world is clearly distinguished by the fact that it is difficult for him to endure visits to large hypermarkets, it is easier for him to order from the Internet with home delivery, for example, to "Shopoz", and sit and wait with a cup of tea in an embrace with a book.
“Introversion is one of the main types of temperament. And the social aspect is just what people focus on, and this social aspect, in fact, reflects only a small part of the essence of an introvert, ”said Dr. Marty Olsen Laney, psychotherapist and author of the book Introvert Advantages.
Despite the growing controversy surrounding introversion, there is often a misunderstanding of the personality traits that are prone to it. More recently, in 2010, the American Psychiatric Association even considered it necessary to classify “introverted personality” as a disorder, by listing it in the Diagnostic and Statistical Manual (DSM-5), which is used to diagnose mental illness. Those. in America introvert = psycho.
But more and more introverts are speaking out about what it really means to be the "quiet" type of person. Are you unsure if you are an introvert or an extrovert? Look at the list, maybe you will find yourself in it.
1. You find trivia incredibly tiresome.
Introverts are known to have real phobias about talking about nothing, because they regard it as idle chatter or an unnecessary source of anxiety, or at least find it irritable. For many "quiet" types, conversations about everything in the world can seem insincere.
2. You go to parties - but not to meet people there.
If you're an introvert, you may occasionally enjoy going to parties, but you probably won't because you don't like meeting new people. At a party, most introverts prefer to hang out with people they already know and feel comfortable around. If you are lucky enough to meet a new person and find mutual understanding with him, great, but you will rarely set a goal specifically to get to know someone.
3. You often feel alone in a crowd.
Have you ever felt like an outsider during parties or group events, even with people you know?
“If you tend to feel alone in a crowd, you might be an introvert,” says Sophia Dembling.
4. Making connections makes you feel like a liar.
Informal communication (meaning socialite talk with the ultimate goal of advancing your career) can make introverts feel like they're being overly hypocritical because they crave being honest about working with someone."
“Making new acquaintances and connections becomes a difficult task if we do it in a way that causes stress on ourselves,” Dembling says, advising introverts to work in small, well-known teams, rather than in huge and mixed ones.
5. They call you "too impressionable"
Do you have a penchant for philosophical conversations and a love for reflecting on books and films? If yes, then you are a real "bookish" introvert.
“Introverts like to suddenly lose control of themselves,” Dembling says.
6. You are easily distracted.
While extroverts tend to get bored quickly if they have nothing to do, introverts tend to opposite problem They are easily distracted and think deeply when they are required to complete a large number of tasks.
“Extroverts generally get bored much faster than introverts when doing monotonous tasks, probably because they excel at where they need to be.” high level attention,” researchers from Clark University wrote in one paper published in the journal Personal and Social Psychology. In contrast, introverts are easily distracted and therefore prefer a relatively inactive environment.
7. Downtime doesn't seem unproductive to you.
One of the most fundamental characteristics of introverts is that they need to spend some time alone in order to “recharge their batteries.” While an extrovert will feel bored or restless after spending the whole day at home alone with tea and a stack of magazines, although this kind of pastime seems necessary and joyful to an introvert.
Introverts can make great leaders and speakers (despite being considered quiet people), they won't necessarily fear the spotlight.
Performers such as Lady Gaga, Christina Aguilera, and Emma Watson identify as introverts, and experts estimate that about 40 percent of executives have an introverted personality type.
9. When you enter the subway, you sit in an empty car in the very corner, but definitely not in the middle.
When given the opportunity, introverts tend to try not to be surrounded by people on all sides.
“We love to land in places where we can leave whenever we want,” Dembling says. "When I go to the theatre, I want to take an aisle or back seat."
10. You start to shut down after being active for too long.
You start to get tired and prefer not to answer questions after you have been driving for too long. active life? It is likely that you are trying to conserve your energy. “Activities in the outside world make all introverts expend energy, after which they need to leave and renew their strength in a calm place,” says the same Dembling. If there is no quiet place nearby, many introverts can simply ignore what is happening.
11. You are in a relationship with an extrovert.
It's true that opposites attract and that's why introverts are often attracted to outgoing extroverts who make them have fun rather than being too serious.
"Introverts sometimes pay attention to extroverts because they also like to have fun," Dembling says.
12. You'd rather be an expert in one area than try to do everything at once.
According to Olsen Laney, the main principles of thinking that guide introverts allow them to focus and think about specific things for a while, so they focus on intensive study of one subject and improving their skills.
13. You actively avoid any shows that may involve audience participation.
Because in reality there is nothing scarier than that, right?
14. You review all your calls before answering (even from friends)
You may not answer the call even from the people you love, but you will definitely call them back as soon as you are mentally ready for this and gather the energy to talk.
"For me, when the phone starts ringing, it's like someone popping out from behind a closet and yelling 'Boo!'" Dembling says. "I really like to lead long telephone conversations with close friends, as long as they are not sudden calls that sound like a bolt from the blue.”
15. You notice details that others don't.
The positive side of deep reflection is that it allows introverts to often have a keen eye for detail, that is, to notice things around them that others may not see at all. The study found that introverts have higher brain activity when processing visual information compared to extroverts.
16. You constantly conduct an internal monologue.
"Extroverts don't have the same internal monologue that we do," says Olsen Laney. “Most introverts need to think first before they talk.”
17. You have low blood pressure
A 2006 Japanese study found that introverts tend to have lower blood pressure than their extrovert counterparts.
18. You may be referred to as an "old man at heart" starting around age 20.
Introverts notice and remember a large number of information, and they always think before they say something, which makes them seem smarter than others.
“Introverts tend to think long hours,” Dembling says. "It helps them seem wise."
19. You don't enjoy your surroundings.
Neurochemically speaking, things like huge parties are just not your thing. Extroverts and introverts differ significantly in how their brains process impressions through their pleasure centers.
Researchers have demonstrated this phenomenon by giving Ritalin, an ADD-type drug that stimulates the production of dopamine in the brain, to introverted and extroverted students. They found that extroverts most often associated achieving feelings of euphoria with a surge of dopamine from the environment they were in. Introverts, on the other hand, did not associate feeling with their environment.
20. You look at the big picture.
When Jung described the mindset of introverts, he explained that they are more interested in the idea and the big picture than in facts and details. Of course, many introverts excel at tasks with a lot of detail, but they often have the ability to perceive more abstract concepts.
"Introverts really enjoy abstract discussions," Dembling confirms.
21. You were often asked to "get out of your shell"
Many introverted children think that something “wrong” is happening to them if they are inherently less open and assertive than their peers. Introverted adults often report that when they were children, they were often told to come out of "their shell" and finally get involved in class life.
22. You are a writer
Introverts generally communicate better in writing than in person, and many are attracted to solitary, creative writing. Most introverts (like Harry Potter author JK Rowling) say they feel most creative when they have time to be alone with their thoughts.
23. You take turns going through the stages of work, loneliness and periods of social activity.
Introverts can move around their introverted "set", which suggests that they must find a balance between their solitude and social activities. But, as Olsen Laney argues, when they move too much (and perhaps even overexert themselves, revolving in society and business for too long), they get stressed and need to go back to solitude. This can manifest itself in periods of increased social activity, and then balancing it with a period of inner seclusion.
“They have special recovery points that seem to correlate with how much interaction they have with those around them,” Dembling says. "We all have our own cycles."
How much of an introvert are you?
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Society tends to hang labels and stamps on everyone who differs from the generally accepted "golden mean". If an athlete - then stupid, if a candidate of science - then a "nerd", if an introvert - then a misanthrope (hates people). But is it? Who are introverts? Is it bad to have this type of personality? How to find out your psychotype, introvert or extrovert? What to do if you or your environment are introverts? Before you "go into yourself", read this article carefully.
What is an introvert?
An introvert is a person who is immersed in his inner world. This type of personality is more focused on their own experiences and thoughts. It is more difficult for him than to establish social ties, to establish contacts with the outside world.
But not everything is so simple. Do not confuse introverts with lazy people or misanthropes. After all, laziness is an unwillingness to do something, misanthropy is antisocial behavior, but introversion is a feature of human thinking. Therefore, if someone says - " I am an introvert", we still need to figure out whether this is so. Perhaps it is simply more convenient for him to “hide behind” such a word, actually shirking work or responsibility.
The real introvert is not a lazy person, just his efforts are aimed at introspection, contemplation of the inner world. Such people very often become philosophers, inventors, scientists, writers, poets, which requires no less work than communication with others.
Introvert and extrovert
Pure psychotypes are extremely rare. Most often, an introvert and an extrovert are combined in a person - this is due to heredity, through which the signs of parents are transmitted. IN different ages one or another psychotype is activated, which depends on the conditions of life and its rhythm.
For the first time, the existence of two opposite types of personality was noticed by the Swiss psychologist Carl Jung who developed the concept of analytical psychology. Thanks to his work, people learned who introverts and extroverts are. The personality of the former turned out to be directed “inward”, while the latter, on the contrary, focused on interaction with the outside world.
Further research has only expanded our knowledge of introverts, highlighting several of their types. Studying psychotypes, the British scientist Hans Eysenck found that introverts are a collective concept, which, in turn, is divided into a number of types. They can be emotionally stable or unstable, which corresponds to phlegmatic or melancholic temperament.
Depending on whether a person is or, his introversion will manifest itself in different ways. In the first case, he will be detached from the outside world, and in the second, he will be distinguished by excessive vulnerability and worries.
How to define an introvert?
Pronounced psychotypes are rare. Basically, both types of personality are combined, just in different periods they are not expressed in the same way. Sometimes one of the qualities develops more actively. To determine your personality type, and at the same time temperament, you can go to our website.
In addition, it is advisable to analyze your behavior, try to detect the following signs of an introvert:
- Feels lonely even among people;
- Avoids crowds, noisy companies;
- Not in a hurry to make new acquaintances;
- If it becomes attached to a person, then for a long time;
- Knows how to make friends, is distinguished by fidelity;
- Prone to introspection, philosophical reflection;
- Prefers to listen rather than speak;
- Likes to fantasize;
- Carefully plans his actions in advance;
- Patient, able to control emotions;
- Differs in observation, attentive to details;
- Long "holds" resentment, unpleasant memories.
If the test results coincide with most of the listed signs, then it can be argued that the person is an introvert.
Is it good or bad to be an introvert?
Let's talk about the pros and cons of being an introvert. Some will instantly say that an introvert is a quiet, modest and shy person who is afraid to stick his nose out of the house, absolutely passive, inclined to obey others. One big minus. But is it really so? Imagine the surprise of those who learn that most of the famous leaders and outrageous artists- Exactly introverts.
For example, world famous introverts are Barack Obama, Hillary Clinton, Warren Buffett, Mark Zuckerberg, Bill Gates, Elon Musk, Michael Jordan, Steven Spielberg, Keanu Reeves, Lady Gaga, Johnny Depp and many others. Of the historical figures, it is worth remembering Isaac Newton, Charles Darwin, Albert Einstein, Mahatma Gandhi and Abraham Lincoln.
In fact, everything is quite logical. Introverts, as opposed to extroverts, not so dependent on other people's opinions. They have their own value system. They are able to move towards the goal in spite of the opinions of others. And this is one of the criteria for leadership. Introverts are good at taking responsibility. They are very self sufficient. They are distinguished by perseverance, concentrate better and are able to carefully prepare for the upcoming work.
If someone has already thought about how to become an introvert, you should not rush into a decision, because introverts are not without flaws. First of all, their disadvantages are associated with unwillingness to build social ties. Introverts can neglect the opinions of others, which sometimes plays a cruel joke with them. In addition, people with the psychotype "introvert" adapt worse to external changes, move up the career ladder more slowly, it is more difficult for them to find friends. At the same time, introverts themselves are very reliable and good friends.
Is it possible to become an introvert?
Let's say some extrovert decided to "retrain" as an introvert. Is he capable of doing it? And most importantly, does he need it? What is an introvert through the eyes of another personality type? Most likely, for a classic extrovert, he will be closed, unsociable, boring.
So why change your personality type then, even if it were possible? An approximate train of thought of such a person is as follows. Most likely, he fails because of his superficiality and hyperactivity. He asks himself the question, why is this happening? Looking for answers on the Internet. Learn what an introvert and extrovert are. He understands that he belongs to the second psychotype. Gathers information to get to know the introvert personality type better. At some point it starts idealize an introverted psychotype and trying to rebuild his temperament and personality.
Is it worth it and how likely is he to become an introvert? It is believed that temperament and psychotype are laid before birth. They depend on the anatomy and physiological features person. That is, they can be corrected only in connection with fundamental changes in the body. Simple workouts, or exercises, you will not change the type of personality.
Development of introversion
You can develop the ability to introvert. Like playing sports various types physique. Both an ectomorph (thin) and a mesomorph (strong man) can pump up, but it will be much more difficult for the first to do this. Also, an extrovert can become more thoughtful, scrupulous and assiduous, but an introvert will do it better.
It is enough to choose those qualities of introverts that it is desirable to adopt, and then methodically practice in their development. Listen more than speak, analyze your life more often, plan actions, etc. Moreover, an introvert and an extrovert often coexist in one person, so develop strengths both psychotypes is real. It is much more difficult to unite a team in which there are introverts and extroverts.
How to communicate with an introvert?
For introverts, due to a special type of thinking, you need to find your own approach. First of all, it should be remembered that an introvert is extremely jealous of his personal space. He is not ready to let everyone in there. Earning the trust of an introvert is long and thorny path. But the result of such efforts will exceed all expectations, because introverts are faithful and reliable life partners.
Secondly, it is desirable to choose words, to respect the inner world of an introvert. They remember grievances for a long time, and if they are “hurt to the quick”, then the matter will not end with one “forgive”.
Thirdly, introverts do not like turmoil and crowds, it is pointless to pull them to noisy parties, rallies and mass celebrations. If you are planning a meeting with an introvert, it is better to invite him to nature, to visit or a quiet secluded place, somewhere in a cozy place.
These are tips for communicating with introverts. But what if you yourself are prone to introversion?
I'm an introvert!
First of all, an introvert is not a psychological deviation, but a special way of thinking. There is nothing bad in it. If you look at it this way, then extroverts even more often fall into unpleasant situations due to its superficiality and energy. It is much worse when "language is ahead of thinking." In this calm people clearly win.
So, if you belong to an introverted personality type, then you should not dramatize. It is better to analyze what hinders results and fix just that. If an introvert has developed skills or logic, this is clearly not a disadvantage. The ability to plan is also useful anytime, anywhere. So they don't need to be corrected. But it is desirable to overcome excessive isolation and vulnerability.
For a change can take the initiative in communication with interesting person. The first to write or call, invite for a walk. Even if a refusal follows, it’s not scary. It is much worse not to try if this call is actually expected.
It is also worth letting others into your life more willingly. It is simply desirable to be discreet, but also to offend others." behind closed doors"is not an option. After all, the world is full good people, so it makes no sense to isolate from them.
The most important thing is not to get hung up on grievances, because many of them arise almost out of the blue. Sometimes a person offends someone by accident, not wanting it. What's the point of making a tragedy over a trifle? Even the most pronounced introvert is able to forgive. To do this, it is enough for him to switch to something good and just try not to remember unpleasant incidents.
Thinking about who an introvert is, you can increasingly catch yourself thinking about the success of such a person. But every advantage has its price. In order for an introvert to be able to fully realize his potential, he needs to learn how to communicate with others, to forget the bad. And others should remember that any introvert is a rather vulnerable person, so it is advisable to respect him and his inner world.
But what about us introverts? People who are sometimes vulnerable and withdrawn, who love peace and quiet, who have nothing against exciting communication, but exclusively narrow circle people and on not mediocre topics? ..
In my article, I will not talk about introverts and their antipodes - extroverts, I want to outline the two main difficulties that I, as an introvert, have already encountered, and some thought on achieving a more comfortable life in an "actively communicative world."
1. Communication with people.
By personal experience I can say that it is very difficult for an introvert to get along with an extrovert. If communication is just formal, then an introvert with minimal losses can stand it, and extroverted relatives, close acquaintances, who love to talk about anything, drain introverts emotionally so that it is felt physically (weakness, detachment, desire to hide).
And what about spouses-antipodes? Well, imagine that you, an introvert, want to read a book in silence after work, and your extrovert half, without talking enough at work, tries to stir you up and is offended if you don’t react.
Introverts do not like empty talk. But this does not mean that they are completely taciturn, no! If the introvert likes the topic and the company, he can talk about something with joy and for a long, long time.
2. Work.
In 80% of cases, work implies, in addition to direct duties, permanent social contact- bosses, colleagues, customers, and sometimes the work itself is direct communication, for example, a sales manager, a telemarketer. By own experience I can say that formal communication with colleagues (without “heart-to-heart tea parties”) and superiors (if necessary) an introvert can easily endure; but if his work involves that very “sociability” that has set the teeth on edge, then things are already more complicated ... Constant communication exhausts the introvert, drains all his strength, and as a result, when he comes home after work that is not so tiring in essence, the introvert feels overwhelmed, depressed - squeezed lemon, in general.
We can say - find a job you like, an introverted one! Yes, there are such specialties - a writer, an editor, an artist, an accountant, finally, but if you look, the path to an editor or a writer who does not write to the table, but receives decent money for his work, is not so short and easy. Until then, what to do? Burn out in "communicative work"? ..
It may seem that introverts are some kind of arrogant touchy, but this is not at all the case. These are people who do not need outside nourishment, they draw strength from their inner world and are not afraid of boredom, because they always have something interesting and useful to occupy themselves with. But in order to have something to feed himself, an introvert needs to constantly replenish his supply of energy. This is what he does, reading a book in seclusion, thinking, drawing something, just doing whatever he likes.
So what to do?.. What should an introvert do, who often thinks that the world is extremely hostile to him and crushes him with his emotions, his rules and attitudes?
1. Develop self-confidence- this is useful for everyone, and especially for an introvert. So he can get rid of many worries and anxieties.
2. Improve communication skills- sometimes through force, through “I don’t want / I can’t”, but even if you are not sociable at all and it suits you, you will have to establish minimal contacts. And it's better if you have at least some idea about it. It’s not worth raping yourself, just look at this situation differently - now you have become a writer, write to yourself calmly, and then go to the editor. And if you can’t connect a couple of words in a conversation with the editor, what will happen then? Represented? That's it, everyone needs minimal communication skills, including introverts.
3. Relaxation Do you feel tired and powerless? Was the day too busy with socializing? Turn on pleasant music, turn off the light, and it is better to light candles or an aroma lamp, take comfortable posture and just relax for 20 minutes ... Don’t think about anything, don’t analyze, just relax.
4. Introverts- most often people who are aesthetically attuned to themselves and to life, do not miss this in yourself. Develop your sensuality, develop yourself, treat yourself with love and care. And in no case do not consider yourself wrong! Of course, for society you can be strange and incomprehensible, but this means that you are not like everyone else, that you are special, you understand yourself, your nature and treat yourself with respect.
The most important thing I want to say to all introverts is: in no case do not break your nature in the name of some social attitudes. Just learn to be plastic, flexible in life, but do not break your essence, your "bone", and do not allow anyone else to break it. We, introverts, are few, but this is our highlight - we are special specimens. Be yourself!
Introverts are not hermits who hate everyone around them. In fact, they really like to chat with close friends or people who share their interests (but the art of small talk is clearly not for them). Introverts also like to seek adventure on their own head, they just don’t always need company for this. They can be great leaders, good listeners, and devoted friends. After all, introverts are people too. But sometimes they can be very difficult to understand ... and forgive.
If, when communicating with introverts, you are increasingly asking the questions “Why is he acting so strangely?”, “What is wrong with me?”, “Am I a bad conversationalist?”, “Is he bored with me?”, “Am I annoying?”, “Hey, where did he run away to?”, it’s better to immediately discard soul-searching and read about what strange thoughts sometimes come to the mind of representatives of this psychotype. And if you are an introvert ... well, you yourself know everything.
1. I hope no one tries to drag me out of the house tonight.
We all sometimes need to crawl under the covers, turn off the phone and spend the whole day in blissful doing nothing. But for introverts, this desire comes much more often.
Therefore, do not be surprised that sometimes your introverted friend or acquaintance will refuse to go to the cinema and fun parties, explaining this with a headache, a pile of things to do, the need to celebrate the cat's birthday, and so on. Just be prepared to hear "no".
And do not try to surprise the introvert and disturb his voluntary seclusion. Otherwise, from your own experience, make sure that shyness has nothing to do with introversion.
2. If I quickly run from the bathroom to my room, then maybe the neighbor will not notice me.
Sometimes introverts feel the need to hide from their roommates. If you are the neighbor, don't worry. Most likely, it's not about you. It's just that sometimes introverts hide from even the nicest people, just to avoid having to exchange a few words with them. So if you see your neighbor running, be understanding and don't show it.
3. I hope someone from the audience took a pet with them
Yes, introverts do not hate others (at least not more often than everyone else). But sometimes they feel much more comfortable in the company of our smaller brothers. will not judge you because you never got into university, will not force you to talk about the weather and politics or take pictures with it. Sometimes this is exactly what an introvert's ideal companion should be.
4. Who is calling me from this number? Everyone who knows me knows that I hate talking on the phone.
Usually introverts do not like to talk on the phone, so calls from unfamiliar numbers put them in a panic. If they do not wait for a call from someone specific, then most likely they simply will not answer. And even if you call from your previous number, it is unlikely that they will talk to you for more than five minutes. Unless you are on the other side of the planet.
This item has positive side. If your introvert buddy finally decided to call you, you really mean a lot to him. Rejoice: this is indeed an achievement.
5. I need people around right now, but I don't want to talk to anyone.
It is because of this thought that introverts are very careful in choosing people for communication. Yes, being friends with or dating an introvert can sometimes be difficult, especially if you're an extrovert.
There are days when introverts want to do something alone: read a book or watch TV. But at the same time they want to feel the presence of another person. This is a special type of loneliness that is unlikely to be understood by extroverts.
If you are an introvert, we wish you always have someone to call to you in such cases.
6. I wish my neighbors were a little less friendly
Naturally, introverts do not dream of rude neighbors. But there are very few things that cause them the same anxiety as neighbors who are overly involved. If they constantly ask how you are, or, worse than that, strive to visit without an invitation, for an introvert this is a real disaster.
7. I will go there only on the condition that I can go home at any time
Introverts always prefer to have a party escape plan in hand. Therefore, they often go to a meeting in their car. This is especially true for parties that they do not want to go to in advance.
8. I'd rather stay with my cat
Well, everything is clear here. Catching someone else's pet at a party is a success. But for an introvert, no one can be better than their pet. Even people. Especially people.
Who else will always understand you, never betray you, disappoint you, and hurt you (well, except by digging your claws into you)? For an introvert, the answer is more than obvious.
9. It's good that this party is not far from my house.
When an introvert is going to a party (unless, of course, she is at his house) best friend and not in his favorite bar), he worries much less when he knows that his house is nearby. It is easier for introverts to get out if it is not necessary to move away from the most comfortable place for them.
Of course, extroverts love to read too. But perhaps only introverts will understand what it's like: in the midst of a party in a noisy bar or any other place where they would have to party to the fullest, start thinking about the book that they left at home.
11. Please do not start a conversation with me just because we are sitting next to each other.
In a cafe, a movie theater, on an airplane - literally anywhere people can sit next to each other, introverts repeat this mantra over and over again. It's not that they don't like to talk. In fact, most introverts really like to find out something interesting about people they don't know. What they don't like is being forced to carry on a conversation with absolutely a stranger. This causes introverts a terrible discomfort.
12. I could now sit in my pajamas and watch my favorite TV series.
Fine, fine. Of course, this thought is not limited to introverts. But introverts are still a little more common.
And finally, one more important thought
Do not confuse with . Introverts love spending time by themselves, it energizes them. extra energy, and long communication with people, on the contrary, draws strength from them. But they love people, although they do not always express their emotions directly. Therefore, sometimes you can forgive them these cute weaknesses, right?
