Communication of boys and girls: features of communication. Female upbringing of boys and male behavior of girls

Sometimes you have to hear complaints parents that their son - a first-grader is much more difficult to master educational material at school than elder sister. He listens inattentively, writes sloppily and retells poorly, but their daughter at this age pleased them with brilliant results. There is really nothing wrong with this, all these are features of the male mind.

By age 7 the developmental difference between boys and girls is one year. In boys, by this age, the left hemisphere is worse developed, and in girls, the right hemisphere. Therefore girls in primary school surpass boys in speech abilities, in memorizing numbers and accuracy of writing. But already in adolescence boys overtake girls in solving non-standard mathematical problems and ingenuity. After 13 years, girls have more beautiful handwriting, fluent speech, they read faster, but boys are better at solving crosswords and geometric problems.

Development and behavior of boys and girls is different from the very moment of birth. Boys have larger brains at birth than girls. But, despite this, boys begin to speak and walk much later than girls. The gender difference is reflected in the behavior and games of babies. The development of girls is focused on survival, while in boys it is aimed at improvement and progress. Here are the specific differences:

1. Girls faster than boys begin to recognize familiar faces, they keep their attention on the face of a person from birth. Boys are more interested inanimate objects than people. They like to look at the hanging rattle and master the development mat.

2. boys reacts to loud sounds worse than girls, they later begin to recognize the shades of emotions of their parents. Boys have higher hearing acuity than girls, but they are more likely to ignore their parents' voices. For example, they have a reaction to a reprimand from their parents in the first minutes of their utterance, and then they simply “turn off” the auditory channel and the parents’ information on the topic of re-education does not reach their consciousness.

Scolding the boy, specifically and briefly talk about what you do not like in his behavior. Otherwise, after a while, he will stop listening to you. It is better not to scold girls, but to explain to them in a low voice that this should not be done. The calm voice of parents, melodious singing and lullabies have a better effect on girls.

3. Already in age At the age of 2.5, boys begin to show aggressiveness and better feel the hostile attitude towards themselves. For full development, you need more space than a girl. Boys have developed spatial vision, so they like to play by throwing toys into the distance.

And in girls, peripheral vision is more developed, they prefer to play sitting with toys that lie in front of their eyes. Therefore, the girl can safely play in her room, placing her dolls and toys in it, and the boy needs to climb on the sofa, climb under the bed and climb the stairs. Boys during the game prefer to compete, and girls can quarrel during competitions.

4. Girls skin sensitivity is more pronounced, they are more responsive to bodily discomfort and feel gentle touches better.
5. If girls perceive information by listening to the opinions and instructions of others, then boys learn everything by copying the behavior of adults. Therefore, it is better for a boy to show an example of good behavior than to explain it many times.

6. boys get irritated faster, and girls are more sad. Girls express their emotions with words or crying, while boys express their emotions with actions.
7. Boys more like toys that can be moved, and girls - bright and beautiful. Girls can play longer than boys new toy, examine them and protect them from damage. Boys play with toys more actively and break them faster.

8. To educate the boy something, you need to keep a fast pace. As soon as you begin to repeat what has been covered to consolidate the material, the attention of the boys weakens. Girls, on the other hand, like to do everything in stages, they prefer to re-test their knowledge.

9. boys in adolescence, they are more quick-witted, inventive and resourceful. But girls quickly adapt to any situation, they communicate more easily and make many friends. Boys ask a question to get a specific answer. And girls only to establish contact with the interlocutor.

Considering all the differences between development and the behavior of the boy and girl, parents should not compare boys with girls. Boys and girls have their own way of growing up. Try not to overload the boy with emotional experiences, they react very hard to them. After all, boys feel responsible for the life and well-being of loved ones, so their problems affect them more.

Before entering school, the child's need for personal affection determined his social circle. A preschooler is usually evaluated according to some one attribute that provides him with a permanent place in a certain group: strong, smart, sings, draws, etc. It is completely different for a schoolchild: he can be the first in mathematics and the last in physical education, and having advanced in physical education, he may be the last in reading. He is constantly moving from one group to another, from one place in the group to another - he knows himself as the center of many and different possibilities.

Previously, the child had a relatively narrow circle of comrades, mostly peers, and, as a rule, fairly well-known to the parents. Now he is more and more often around children. different ages, cultural level and behavior. Feeling like a member of a motley company, a recent preschooler, asserting himself in the eyes of the group, will consider it his duty to act in accordance with the aspirations of more active "starters", which are not always clear to him. Such a group may raid the quietly playing girls, accompanying this "feat" with insulting remarks. Participants in such an action, as a rule, are not aware of its motive, much less the meaning of the words thrown at the girls. Repeated repetition of such actions can help to consolidate the way of behavior when a girl is offended, casually, without the desire to offend, out of a desire for “male superiority”.

The younger student already has some idea of ​​help and empathy. But it is concrete and based not on an understanding of the objective meaning of actions, but on a positive emotional dependence child with adult approval. Collective relations are only being formed. The student does not yet understand the situation of another, cannot imagine himself in his place. Moral behavior, expressed in sympathy and help, lags behind the formal knowledge of “what is good”, and negative behavior is ahead of the possibility of judging “what is bad”.

Self-esteem of a younger student

In the primary grades, there are conditions that encourage and accelerate the process of developing self-esteem: the child determines his place among others, makes attempts to imagine his future on this basis. It is impossible to deny the role of temperament and character in the formation of self-esteem, but it is necessary to emphasize the leading role of social and environmental factors in this case- schools. Already in the 1st and 2nd grades, low achievers and excellent students may develop an overestimated self-esteem. An obstacle to the correct development of the personality of children with high self-esteem is their lack of self-criticism, and for the normal development of the personality of children with low self-esteem, low self-criticism.

Self-esteem affects the level of aspirations in the future and how it differs in boys and girls. In girls' ideas about the future, the motives of the family are clearly heard, emotional attachment desire to be beautiful and loved. The life plans of boys are more focused on self-development, self-realization. The psyche of a junior schoolchild is characterized by "contemplative curiosity". Predominant development of involuntary attention. Hence the significant need for visibility, the desire to touch, take in hand everything of interest. This desire is reinforced by the pronounced emotionality of children. “Many contradictions of this age are connected with the fact that the younger schoolchild, who is at the “pre-moral” stage of the dominance of subjectivity in behavior, begins to enter the phase of determining his place in the team, developing positions in relation to duties.

Moral behavior of a younger student

In the lower grades, the foundations of moral behavior and consciousness continue to be laid. A younger student, usually not being able to clearly identify an element to follow, imitates in everything. The girl copies her older friend or the heroine of the film, not only trying to reproduce the main thing she liked, but also adopting an attitude towards appearance, to the opposite sex - she can do a manicure, impress her parents with a sudden change in hairstyle. The boy can not only build up strength, striving to be like his hero, but also adopt the traits of vulgarity and rudeness from him. In these cases, adults face a difficult task: to identify the primary incentive to imitate and, without offending it in the eyes of the child, to clear it of everything, random, undesirable. It is useful not only to explain that this or that trait is not good, but also to show how and in what way it interferes with its owner. However, only by explaining and demanding, without showing an example of their own attitude and behavior, adults contribute to the fact that children can make the observance of moral norms and rules directly dependent on the situation, the mood of adults, develop an idea of ​​the formality of morality and morality - morality for school, morality for home. Morality for the company of peers, morality for oneself, etc.

The first lessons of "prudence", double morality, the child takes from adults who by no means set themselves the task of teaching these lessons, but who believe that a child should be educated by appealing only to his consciousness, reason. Contrary to the opinion of some parents, children usually not only do not get tired of duties, but also actively look for them. Not finding them at school and at home, the child will look for and find them in other places, and, perhaps, in completely unacceptable, "ugly" forms. The street is strong with its rich arsenal of means of influence, addressed not only to the mind, but above all to feelings and experiences. At primary school age, a number of new psychological qualities are formed. “Already by the 3rd grade, in the course of directed educational influences, arbitrariness is formed as a special quality mental processes, and in connection with it, a sense of duty ”[Davydov V.V., 1973; Levitov N. D., 1969]. For some, this is stable and manifests itself in a wide range of life relationships, for others, in individual actions or a relatively narrow sphere of behavior, for others it is still poorly developed, some can be obedient. But only as required. The ability to plan actions for oneself, internally, develops. The ability to evaluate one's actions as if from the outside begins to take shape. This skill underlies reflection-quality, which allows you to reasonably and objectively analyze your thoughts and actions from the angle of their compliance with the plan and conditions of activity.

Communication at school

In the primary grades, boys and girls begin the period of formation of self-assessment as a representative of a certain gender. The class is divided into two camps - boys and girls, betrayal of their camp is condemned and despised. The polarization of the sexes is a natural pattern of development, outwardly manifested often by actions of an aggressive or defensive nature, which reflect an internal interest in the other sex.

Example…

The boy pulls the girl's braid and when asked by the teacher why he did it, he answers: "I like her." Being in the mouth of a child rather an exception to the rule, this explanation reveals true motives outwardly aggressive or defensive behavior. As a rule, it does not cause serious conflicts among schoolchildren.

Recently, more and more often it is necessary to observe in girls of this age a boyishly aggressive style of behavior, which previously manifested itself, and even then not always and not in all, only in the puberty period. The rules of conduct for schoolchildren are the same for boys and girls. Schools have the same requirements. They have the same rights and obligations. But this, of course, does not mean at all that a differentiated (separate, divided) approach to the moral education of boys and girls is superfluous. On the contrary, for successful moral education It is not enough for younger schoolchildren to know the general goals and conditions of this education, it is not enough to take into account only the age characteristics of children. It is important to imagine the features of the sexual development of children at this age, to take into account some differences in the development of the personality of boys and girls. The child's inherent ability to imitate allows him to early choose a certain pattern of behavior. First, he imitates some external signs of the behavior of the person he chooses as a role model, then there is a deeper “equating” of himself with the personality of the person of the model. At the same time, the child borrows not only samples, some actions and external features, but also such complex personality traits as kindness, gentleness, responsiveness or determination, masculinity, fortitude. WITH early years Boys usually choose a significant person (father) as a role model, girls - (mother). Relationships between adults influence the child's understanding of his belonging to one sex or another and his "choice" of the appropriate type of behavior. The ideas of adults themselves (parents in the first place) about the differences in the behavior and morality of men and women, one way or another, penetrate into the children's environment, are reproduced and assimilated in the game.

Parents, and especially a mother, from the first days of the birth of a child, most often without realizing it, treat their son or daughter in different ways. In the first six months, mothers usually touch their sons much more often than their daughters, but after six months the picture changes: boys begin to wean themselves from excessive affection, and girls are allowed to spend much more time near their mother. The weakening of contacts with the mother strengthens the independence of the child. It is this quality, according to some scholars, that mothers intuitively seek to develop in their sons. With age, differences in attitudes towards boys and girls on the part of adults increase more and more. Differences in the subject environment of boys and girls appear relatively early - they not only different clothes, but also different toys. Adults encourage the stereotypes of behavior adopted for this sex - for example, a boy is shamed for being tearful, and a girl is blamed for being mischievous. A grubby, scratched, with skinned knees, the boy often evokes the condescendingly touching attitude of an adult: “What should I do? It's a necessary evil." A girl with the same appearance would, however, first of all cause discontent. Already in preschool childhood, the child accumulates knowledge about typically masculine or typically female role, O physical difference men and women, about the difference in their behavior, about their relationships, about the most important personality traits. At this time, the child develops a sense of gender, and characteristic forms of behavior associated with the “role” of a man or woman begin to appear.

The behavior of the boy and the behavior of the girl are different

Coming to school, the child behaves according to his ideas about what a boy should be and what a girl should be. So, as a rule, girls behave timidly, insecurely; they are quieter and more reserved, executive and demanding of themselves and others. Boys, from the first days of their stay at school, behave freely, without confusion, they are more noisy, prefer unregulated activities. In any situation, boys usually quickly get to know each other, quickly find a common cause. They prefer collective sports or war games. It is characteristic that the boys are not so demanding on the constancy of the composition of the group, they willingly accept peers from other classes, yards, and schools into their play groups. Girls outside the home, in a new situation, get lost, keep apart when there are no relatives or girlfriends nearby. They prefer to communicate in small groups of two or three people. Boys, as a rule, avoid girls, try not to notice them, prefer not to take them into their boyish games. The exception is those boys who do not enjoy special respect from their peers. They are often not accepted into boy groups. Many girls are wary of boys. One feels not fear, but rather some distrust of the boys, the expectation of aggressiveness on their part. At the same time, girls show interest in boys and in their activities. By the end of the first half of the year, schoolgirls already know all the boys in their class not only by last name, but also by first name. Boys, with some exceptions, only know the names of some of the girls. Particularly great curiosity and, at the same time, alertness towards representatives of the opposite sex are shown by the only children in the family who, moreover, did not attend kindergarten. These boys and girls, more than other children, avoid each other when they go to or from school, at recess, at play. The experience of joint activities among younger students is still limited, especially outside of communication in the classroom, excursions, walks, etc.

Often conflicts arise between students of the opposite sex. At the same time, girls have more complaints than boys. They complain not only about the boys, but also about each other, and often over trifles. An analysis of these conflicts shows that they are not based on some kind of deliberate alienation or hostility of boys and girls to each other. Most often, this is simply a transfer of purely boyish forms of communication into the sphere of communication with girls. Boys try to fight with them, measure their strength, etc. Girls, on the other hand, perceive these forms of communication, which are not quite usual for most of them, not as a game, but as an attempt to offend them. The noted features of children's behavior are more typical for the first grade than for primary school age in general. The new rhythm of a child's life, a new type of relationship with his parents and other adults, with his recent kindergarten friends transform purely "boyish" and "girlish" forms of behavior, filling them with new and deep moral content. The spontaneously formed worldly ideas of the child about a man and a woman undergo significant changes. Children purposefully form stable ideas about the principles of the relationship between men and women, about the moral qualities of people: their nobility, humanity, especially in relation to the weak, protecting them, male honor and dignity, masculinity - for boys, pride, modesty, modesty and tenderness - for girls. It is in the school that the foundations are laid for the deep awareness of the children of their personality as the personality of a man or woman. In grades III and IV, the need special approach to the upbringing of boys and girls is becoming more and more evident. At this time, the difference in the rates of general physical (including sexual) development of boys and girls increases (it reaches a maximum in adolescence). Girls sooner and deeper begin to realize themselves as a person. female type. They develop a sense of maturity earlier. The same personality changes in boys begin two to three years later.

World of emotions

The younger student must perform a number of responsible school duties, which entails appropriate assessments of the teacher, the class team, as well as certain reactions of the home. Evaluation evokes certain emotional experiences in the child: joy, experiencing one’s shortcomings in comparison with comrades, etc. Failures in completing tasks can give rise to a feeling of irritation in some children in relation to others, envy of comrades who deserve praise, and may even give rise to the urge to annoy the teacher or the class. But if such failures are not of a long-term nature and the child is not alienated from the team, then they usually lead to the emergence of an acute desire to take a worthy place in the class and at home, cause a desire to learn better in order to succeed. In this case, the fulfillment of educational tasks becomes the basis of such experiences as excitement, self-doubt, joy in the event of success, concern that things will get worse, reassurance that the task was completed, etc. Younger students can react violently to separate phenomena affecting them. The emotional behavior of schoolchildren when they watch the play is indicative: here one can clearly see the sharp transitions from sympathy for the hero to indignation against his enemies, from sadness over his failures to stormy expressions of joy at his success. Mobility, numerous gestures, transitions from fear to delight, drastic changes in facial expressions indicate that a lot affects the child and leads to vivid emotional responses. This is related to the younger student with preschoolers. But in a number of significant moments, his emotional behavior acquires new features: he begins to more restrainedly express his emotions - discontent, irritation, envy, when he is in the class team, since incontinence in the manifestation of feelings here causes a remark. The ability to control your feelings develops from year to year. For example, a younger schoolboy begins to show his anger and irritation not so much in a motor form (he no longer tries to fight, does not pull something out of his hands), but verbally (teasing, rude). Feelings of anger and shame are more hidden, but still they are quite obvious to others. The formation of expressive speech and facial expressions is accompanied by the development of the ability to empathize.

In the initial school years the child intensively develops moral feelings - feelings of comradeship, responsibility for the class, sympathy for the grief of others, indignation at someone's injustice. The experience of such feelings is very important - it is easier for a child to act in accordance with the norms that are instilled in him by adults, precisely when something emotionally hurts him, when he vividly feels the need to do so, and not otherwise, when he experiences the acuteness of an exciting experience . Feelings as motives for the behavior of a junior schoolchild occupy a large place in his life. And in form they are now different than those of a preschooler. The motives of behavior based on positive experiences (sympathy, disposition, attachment) become more effective and manifest in various forms. Motivations associated with feelings of sympathy, friendliness, a sense of duty find their expression when schoolchildren prepare gifts for young children in kindergarten, when they correspond with children from other countries, participate in activities aimed at the common good: collect waste paper, plant trees decorate the school. In this kind of behavior, moral feelings develop and deepen, turn into effective force encouraging good deeds. But all this happens under one indispensable condition: good and useful deeds are connected with the living emotional response child. If there is no such response, then no matter, no matter how useful it may be objectively, will not make changes in the inner world of the student, the action will remain, only formally good, but essentially indifferent, in no way affecting the spiritual image of the student, his inner growth. .

The emotional world of a younger student is quite diverse - here are the worries associated with sports games, resentment or joy arising in communication with peers, moral experiences caused by the kindness of others or, on the contrary, injustice. Poems and stories, especially if they are expressively read, films and theatrical performances, songs and musical plays can make a rather deep impression on them.

Psychological features

Psychological features, albeit in an undeveloped form, are already revealed from early age. As the child develops, they become more and more distinct.

Boys develop both physically and psychologically at a somewhat slower pace than girls. It is known that they start talking at an average of 2-4 months. later girls, later they develop many concepts related to the relationship between people; when they start school, they tend to be less prepared than girls. Boys are slower and more difficult to develop such qualities as responsibility, conscientiousness, diligence; even with proper upbringing, it is on average more difficult to develop these qualities in males. At any age, female representatives are more inclined to turn to authorities in determining their position; in case of any difficulties, they are more inclined to adhere to established norms of behavior. Girls at school are easier to get to do any assignments. Apparently, therefore, teachers (mostly women) are more willing to give instructions to girls and underestimate the ability of boys to carry out such assignments. And often completely surprising and unexpected for them is the ability of boys to take the matter seriously, to show activity and independence; it is characteristic that the latter is often found precisely in extracurricular activities - for example, on a hike where the class goes. It is here that it turns out that boys can be serious, and businesslike, and active, and in this situation it is clearly more productive than girls.

The interests and inclinations of the male representatives are often directed to relatively distant objects and phenomena, sometimes far from what could be included in the direct duties of a boy, teenager, youth. Hence, a more pronounced tendency in the male sex to be distracted by extraneous matters, to do things other than what is directly required. If the focus of a girl, starting from an early age, is a person and the sphere of his immediate being - the relationship between people, surrounding objects, then the attention of boys is attracted to a much greater extent by distant objects and phenomena. Associated with this are better knowledge of girls about themselves, their greater attention to their appearance and to the peculiarities of the appearance and behavior of others, greater interest in inner world, great sensitivity to the feelings and experiences of a person. It is no coincidence that girls are 3-4 times more likely than boys to keep a diary. Differences in interests and inclinations determine some of the important advantages of the male sex, a greater breadth of thinking, a broader outlook, " best ability comparison of distant objects and phenomena, greater objectivity of generalization and, at the same time, important shortcomings - less everyday adaptability, a worse understanding of the necessary in comparison with the understanding of the possible. Noticeable differences in the perception of time and space.

Female representatives are more attracted to what is located directly next to the person - the house, the environment, the immediate environment, the people with whom you have to communicate, that is, everything is directly interconnected. Representatives of the male sex, regardless of the immediate need, from everyday affairs, are often interested in objects and phenomena remote, not connected in any way. The attention of the female representatives is not distributed so widely, but within the limits of what is perceived, everything is reflected in the minds more carefully and in detail. Therefore, in an unfamiliar environment (new area, new route movements, etc.) boys, teenagers, young men are more confident than their peers. If you want to know how to get through or drive somewhere where this or that object is located, etc., it is better to ask the boys: their explanations are always more useful, and often more sensible than the explanations of adults. However, females often feel more confident and are more active in social situations. If the object, the area, the subject as a whole is sufficiently known to both boys and girls, then girls know it better. It is no coincidence that, on average, they write better summaries and essays: they have more coherence and descriptiveness, more attention to detail, although not more fantasy. In the perception of the flow of time itself, female representatives are inferior to males, which, however, is not always noticeable due to their more responsible, on average, attitude to their duties. Characterized by greater riskiness, "sweeping" behavior, greater mobility and restlessness of boys, adolescents, youths in comparison with their peers.

The lower maturity of boys in comparison with girls is especially clearly manifested in the lower grades. They are more distracted from the lessons, and their thoughts often wander far from what they should be doing. If girls have to be required to do their homework, then boys have to be forced to do it. Girls are, on average, more accurate, diligent, conscientious, and more efficient. Even if, in general, a boy thinks no worse, but better than a girl, it is more difficult to make him think in a lesson than a girl. Boys' restlessness, their lesser ability to endure a static load is manifested in their more frequent violation of discipline in the lesson, in more noisy behavior during breaks. Less attention to himself and daily activities finds expression in the fact that the boy is much more difficult to teach to keep his own things in order. workplace, neatly fold clothes and put shoes.

Psychological differences between boys and girls are clearly expressed as the causes of academic failure. Among the reasons for the failure of girls in all classes, poor health (i.e., an objective and valid reason) occupies a larger percentage, while failure associated with gaps in the skills of educational work, with a negative attitude towards learning, with low level upbringing, in boys it is observed more often than in girls, and at all ages. In general, a complex of negative attitudes towards learning, disorganization, lack of system and lack of discipline is the cause of failure in boys about twice as often as in girls.

Age maturity

In the primary grades, the main difficulty in teaching boys is precisely their immature attitude to learning: they do not feel responsible, they worry little or do not worry at all because of poor grades and dissatisfaction of the teacher and parents, they forget what they are given, or do not attach any importance to it, and parents have to learn about homework for them. In fact, the boys here show themselves as children of more younger age. Take into account, no matter how smart and capable you are Small child, much cannot be demanded of him simply because of his age immaturity. In grades I-III, children of different ages sit at the same desk: on average, boys younger girls for a year and a half, although this difference is not in the calendar age. Along with this, the boys also lack proper labor skills, and the qualities necessary for its successful implementation are not developed: perseverance, perseverance, patience, diligence, diligence, accuracy. Any kind of mental activity is difficult for them if it requires a conscious manifestation of activity, efforts on oneself. It is interesting at the same time that they tend to overestimate any success more than girls: if something works out, the eyes are ready to declare that it is easy and simple, the same thing that does not work out seems too difficult and complicated for them: in this lack of criticality.

Boys are more likely than girls to experience mood swings - from excessive self-confidence to the loss of this confidence, although in general, in comparison with girls, they tend to overestimate themselves. In the case of a wrong upbringing, this can be combined in the most illegal way with a sense of superiority towards girls; this feeling is characteristic of the least mature males, those who themselves are far from the norms of behavior of their sex. In educational activities, differences in the interests and inclinations of male and female representatives are fully manifested. In general, the circle of interests of boys is wider than that of girls. Boys have an advantage in knowledge of something special, rarer, special, but they are inferior to girls in knowledge of simpler and more common objects and phenomena. Vocabulary in boys is usually wider, especially at the expense of more distant objects and more general concepts. Boys' speech is dominated by words that convey actions, while girls (and women in general) are more prone to subject-evaluative speech. Among those who do well in mathematics, there are more boys than girls; among those who do well in literature and foreign languages more girls than boys. Apparently, the very nature of the subjects of the humanitarian plan is more in line with the inclinations and nature of the thinking of girls, while the clear, more schematic and abstract nature of the subjects of the physical and mathematical cycle is more in line with the inclinations and nature of the thinking of boys. IN free time boys are more inclined to go in for sports, devote time to outdoor games, while girls - to reading, music, etc. Boys tend to collect collections of something in general more than girls, but the success of this activity can be almost the same: girls are helped out by greater accuracy, boys - the best systematic.

In relation to boys and girls to comrades and teachers significant differences No. In the lower grades, both for those and for others, the greatest authority is the teacher. In adolescence, the opinion of comrades and intra-class relationships become increasingly important. At the same time, girls are more inclined to make critical statements about teachers and comrades, to complain about something, but this is more of the nature of a single reaction to a particular event, is rarely generalized, and generally does not reflect a negative attitude towards school-wide and intra-class affairs. On the contrary, boys are less inclined to assess any events and their statements are accompanied by a lesser emotional reaction. Nevertheless, in a number of cases it is boys who can develop a fairly stable system of negative attitudes towards school. A significant shortcoming of schoolchildren of both sexes is the inability to organize joint activities.

Difficulties of education

The upbringing of boys is at school a more difficult task for teachers, due to the above psychological characteristics of the male sex. In general, it can be said that the school is currently coping worse with the education of males than the education of women. It is no coincidence that in academic performance boys are on average inferior to their peers, among them are more common bad habits(smoking, drinking alcohol, swearing), they are more likely to commit offenses. Therefore, knowledge of psychological gender characteristics and taking them into account in practical activities is necessary for everyone who is interested in the full-fledged education of the younger generation. And the difficulties associated with the upbringing of male schoolchildren can in no way justify the shortcomings that exist here.

For general intellectual development and expanding the horizons of the child, a large sphere of communication affects favorably, but on moral development- not always. Children do not yet know how to consciously select spiritual and moral values in different areas of communication, perceive the environment without proper criticism. This is the source of negative effects on the child. Of course, a child brought up with stable moral and intellectual qualities has more opportunities to resist harmful influences. This imposes a serious responsibility on adults - no need to think that their behavior and appearance matter only in their own family. Without noticing it, adults often have an impact on children - and in a variety of and unexpected places. What these influences are depends on the moral content of the actions of adults. And they need to be guided next rule: around other people's children, it is important to behave as you would like others to behave in the presence of your child. The successful solution of all these problems presupposes the unification of the efforts of the school and the family when working with each child.

Sources

1. The relationship of children in joint activities and the problems of education: Sat. scientific trd. – M.: NII OP, 1976.
2. Isaev D.N., Kagan V.E. Sex education and mental hygiene in children. - L .: Medicine, 1980.
3. Stankin M.I. If we want to cooperate. - M .: Publishing Center "Academy", 1996.
4. The World of Childhood: Junior Schoolboy / Ed. A.G. Khripkova - M .: Pedagogy, 1998.
5. Solovieva O.B. Feedback V interpersonal communication. – M.: 1989.
6. Khripkova A.G., Kolesov D.V. A boy - a teenager - a young man. – M.: Enlightenment, 1982.
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8. Shkolnik L. Sexual education of schoolchildren. - Chisinau, 1989.

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The article was prepared by: teacher-psychologist - M. N. Larionova

These tables convince us that when studying a child, one cannot ignore gender differences associated with the peculiarities of the organization of their brain and psyche. All these differences are realized by the teacher in a gender-differentiated approach. The essence of this approach is to prepare children for future sexual social roles, development of potential opportunities for the development of mental differences between boys and girls.

In humanistic psychology and pedagogy, the child is considered

from the positions su In the pedagogical dictionary, the subject is considered as a “bearer of subject-practical activity and cognition. The subjectivity of a person is manifested in his life, communication, self-consciousness ”, (see Kodzhaspirova G.M., Kodzhaspirov A.Yu. Pedagogical dictionary: For students of higher and middle educational institutions. - M: Publishing house "Academy" , 2000, p. 144).

Considering that the child during the preschool period needs attention, pedagogical influence, support, has little life experience, socializes by imitation and borrowing of self-identification with others, many researchers consider the child from the standpoint of the development of subjectivity, as a socially holistic quality of the personality, which is necessary to form in the process of pedagogical interaction (T.I. Babaeva, E.O. Smirnova, T.A. Kulikova, L.A. Paramonova, etc.).

At the junior stage preschool age the child appears before the adult as an object. The task of the teacher is to create conditions that favorably affect the timely formation of the basic characteristics of the individual: competence, emotionality, creativity (creativity), independence, activity, initiative, freedom of behavior, arbitrariness (volitional regulation). The pedagogical position of an adult involves active learning, cooperation and pedagogical support. General pedagogical conditions for the development of the subjectivity of a young child will be:

Formation of the child's confidence in their abilities, abilities;

Development of positive self-learning (fixing success, creating a situation of success, overcoming difficulties);

Creation of a positively - interested attitude towards games, peer activities;

Correction of unfavorable forms of child development (shyness, aggressiveness, isolation, anxiety, etc.);

Organization of a subject-developing environment for amateur games, different types productive activity;

Creation of trust in adults, manifestation of aspirations to perform independent actions: choose an interesting and attractive activity, its means, partners, defend one's position.

At the senior preschool age, the development of subjectivity is understood as the child's ability to take and show an active position in various activities: to set and adjust goals, to be aware of motives, to independently build actions and evaluate them. The child, as a subject, begins to present the rules of behavior not only to others, but also to himself, the level of self-awareness increases. The role of an adult is changing - from a partner, participant, coordinator, he turns into an observer, consultant, to whom children turn as an authoritative adviser, assistant, arbiter. Such a change in position is associated with the formation and further improvement of the basic personality traits of the child.

The personality-oriented approach presupposes a psychological and pedagogical sequence (as a stylistic, democratic behavior) of the content and methods of raising a child as a person.

Are common, pedagogical conditions development of an older preschooler includes

Stimulation of the child's subjectivity;

Building interaction on the basis of cooperation, mutual understanding, mutual assistance, coordination of actions;

Understanding, recognition and acceptance of the child as a full partner;

Recognition of the child as a "self-developing" personality;

Building "subject-object" relations in various activities (nature, social, "man-made" world);

Involvement of design technology, as actively - search activities in terms of choice;

Using the ideas of non-violence pedagogy, a constructive approach to the relationship between the world of adults and the world of children;

Creation of centers of interest, laboratories of knowledge and creativity for the development of self-determination, self-realization, self-promotion.

So the object preschool pedagogy- a child distinguished by his world, subculture, complexity and originality age development. "Ecological", careful attitude to the child main principle studying the child as an object.

Subjectivity (as a child's own activity) is formed under the influence of biological and social factors, constructive, technologically competent pedagogical activity adult.

Questions for self-examination:

1. What are age stages preschool?

2. What underlies the phasing?

3. What are the features of the psychological and pedagogical "portrait" of a preschooler?

4. What explains the relationship between the psychological gender and the pedagogical "portrait" of a child - a preschooler?

5. Does the psychological and pedagogical age of the child coincide?

6. What is the development of the child as a subject?

7. What are the general pedagogical conditions for the development of the subjectivity of a child of younger and older preschool age? What do they have in common?

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Page creation date: 2017-12-12

Are the mental, physical development and behavior of boys and girls really very different? What to prepare for and how to behave to parents expecting a son or daughter? Meticulous scientists have found that in reality, gender differences are not so significant, although there are some that appear even in the womb and persist throughout childhood.

The anatomical features of the structure of the bodies of boys and girls are obvious. But in terms of brain formation, the disparity between the sexes is actually very small. It turns out that the characteristics of human development have more to do with life experience than with gender.. This means that in order to realize its potential, your miner from the very tender age needs attention and encouragement. What and to what extent does it actually affect gender? And what can be done to ensure that the child develops harmoniously?

1. Sensuality and emotionality

The results of more than 100 independent studies are unanimous: women use the language of emotions and gestures much more actively. Already in infancy, girls are better at “reading information” on facial expressions and are more willing to study a person’s face than his mobile phone. Boys are the opposite. These differences are clearly expressed and . Psychologists believe that the main reason is not in gender, but in the fact that girls from childhood are taught to express their feelings, and boys, on the contrary, to suppress and hide them.

Mothers know how sensitive, tender and vulnerable their sons can be. Therefore, teach the boys not to be shy about their emotions, to express them in words and facial expressions. Comment on the baby's actions, voicing his feelings instead. For example: “You are upset because you cannot reach the rattle. You are happy that your mother helped you.

2. Spatial perception

One of the reasons why mostly boys participate and win at Mathematical Olympiads is their ability to solve problems on the fly, related to the size of objects and the distance between them. That is, the children have better developed spatial skills. This gender split is noticeable from infancy: already at the age of a toddler, he is able to predict where the ball that has rebounded from his hand will roll. Such abilities were not observed in girls. In the future, the difference increases even more because of the children's love for outdoor sports and video games that develop spatial perception.

For harmonious development, a girl needs to regularly play ball, build castles from blocks, get acquainted with video games suitable for her age. Before you teach her to read, get her interested in numbers.

3. Favorite toys

For babies, it doesn't matter if it's fun for girls or boys. Often, mothers notice that the boys are happy to fiddle with the doll, and the young princess cannot be pulled away from the helicopter. Gender differences appear in children's preferences for toys at the age of about a year, for the most part, the pressure from adults, who obey the accepted customs in society, is to blame. True, scientists argue that hormones also matter. If during pregnancy the level of testosterone in a woman's body was higher, the born daughter will experience a passion for cars. A study of primate behavior showed that males among toy cars and teddy bears will choose the first, and females - both.

Conclusion

Do not limit the child in the choice of toys and do not impose your own stereotypes on him. The boy will gradually give up the doll himself, and the girls can play with soldiers and wheeled vehicles for a long time.

4. Physical activity

Who jumps on the playground, runs with the ball and hangs on all sorts of horizontal bars? That's right: mostly boys. Canadian scientists put together the results of 46 studies and found that already in the womb, children kick their mother more often and make more worm-like movements with their fingers than babies. And after the birth, the boys wriggle more on the changing table, behave more restlessly in the stroller and crawl further.

Conclusion

Indeed, the most active kids- almost always boys, and the least mobile - girls. So nature took care that the male could always catch up with the female he liked and defeat (convince) her. But these are extremes, and most children of the same age in physical activity differ very little.

5. Aggression

Testosterone is the king of all wars and a stimulant for the formation of a muscular male figure. Therefore, it is absolutely natural that boys are physically stronger, and in adolescence they are also often more aggressive. But girls are not angels! It turns out that at preschool and primary school age they bite, kick and even give out heavy cuffs 3 times more often than their peers-boys.

WITH early childhood the aggression of both boys and girls must be curbed, kept within acceptable limits of decency and safety. After all, unlike other mammals, humans should be guided not by hormones, but by a developed brain. Kids need to be taught other, more adequate forms of behavior, brought up in love, instilled in the principles of personal integrity, respect for themselves and for other people.

6. Mastering the skill of walking

Many parents claim that their sons went before their daughters, while pediatricians swear otherwise. In fact, numerous observations prove that there are absolutely no gender differences in mastering the skill: somewhere between and 16 months, all children begin to walk without support. Psychologists explain this misconception by the so-called parental expectations. That is, mothers of physically stronger boys overestimate their motor skills, and the same achievements of miniature girls go unnoticed.

Any child needs to train muscles: in infancy, do not forget to do exercises, do not keep grown-up little ones all day in a stroller or in an arena, and later - at a TV or computer. Physical education and outdoor games are our everything!

7. Speech development

This is practically the only sign by which boys really differ from girls: they begin to speak, on average, a month later than their peers. British scientists have found that at the age of 18 and 24 months, young princesses have a much richer vocabulary than their knights. At the same time, experts argue that gender is “responsible” for only 3% of differences in the verbal skills of children, while at least 50% are communication in the family and the impact of others.

Moms and dads should, as usual, endlessly talk-talk and talk with their children. Reading aloud with intonational expression of books, thoughtful answers to all children's "why", constant commenting on actions (their own and those around them) - and the unfortunate 3% will simply dissolve in the hubbub of babies.

8. Potty Training (Tidiness Skill)

The need to secure the girl with a one-time or reusable diaper disappears from parents on average 3 months earlier. Experts believe that a child is able to wear normal panties when he remains dry during the day for 2 or more hours. Similar " Golden time» occurs between 22 and 30 months of age in girls (depending on individual features babies). Completely control urination and go to the toilet on their own (cleanliness skill) young ladies begin (on average!) at 33 months, and boys at 37 months. The biggest difference is in the ability to urinate “on demand” with an effort of will for a maximum of 5 minutes, with any degree of filling. Bladder. For boys, this happens at 3 years and 8 months, and for girls - 5 months earlier. Let us pay attention once again: these are average figures obtained on the basis of observation of a huge cohort of children, therefore the indicators of one specific child may differ greatly.

Even if you decide not to rush your little one with potty training, give him as a toy for his first birthday and let him have fun playing with him. Who knows, perhaps it is your kid who will beat the statistics by rehabilitating all the boys.