What to educate in children. How to raise a boy without a father. basic rules for raising children

1. Don't yell at the child
   Old and worn advice, but incredibly useful. When you yell at your child, he absorbs all the aggression like a sponge and over time just throws it out.

   Calm down, take a deep breath, and think about what you feel so bad about. Now mentally prepare for unpleasant situation, and when the time will come Express your dissatisfaction in a casual tone. This makes education much easier.

   Can't contain yourself? Yes, it's hard, no doubt! Here is an invaluable recommendation that has already helped many adults to cope with themselves. First, figure out what exactly causes you irritation and screaming. Always be prepared for this kind of situation. Loud music? Bad marks? You have already gone through this more than once and, in theory, you should be ready for such a nuisance. Of the two of you, you are the adult!

   Count up to 10. If you do this simple manipulation, it will be just a shame to break into a scream!
   

2. Don't ask too much
   Your child will definitely be the best for you, even if he does not win medals in swimming or does not study the best.

   You should not assume that your offspring should be like you at the same age, or shift the implementation of all your unfulfilled ambitions to him. Just look for what he does best and develop it!
   
   

3. Make a Good Impression
   Children are a mirror of their parents, and they will evaluate everything you do and even repeat.

   Surprise your child with unexpected skills, show your knowledge, strength, character. Thus, you can not only gain authority, but also invest in the child all the best that is in you.
   
   

4. Discuss, help, convince
   There must be complete understanding between you. Discuss with your child everyday life, be him not only a teacher, but also a friend. Help him to feel that help and advice can be expected from you at any moment, make sure that the family home is a fortress for him, in which he will be listened to and helped.

   Convince your offspring that it is he who is the blacksmith of his life, his failures and successes. Great people grow up in an atmosphere of love and mutual understanding.
   
   

5. Spend more time together
   Even if it’s impossible to carve out a lot of time for a child in your schedule, use it as efficiently as possible. Reading books, going to the theatre, outdoor recreation - an incredibly positive effect on your relationship and accustom your child to useful activities.

   If the child does not get enough attention, he will start looking for it from others. And there is no guarantee that everything will be fine in the end.
   
   

6. Don't shy away from questions
   Even if a child asks a sensitive question, don't try to avoid the answer. Children are not yet ready to accept some information, but any uncertainty in the answer will distort the child's perception. Answer directly, but concisely, if the topic is unpleasant for you.
   
   
7. Don't Avoid Difficulties
   Your task as a parent is to prepare the fragile and carefree children's consciousness for adulthood. Carefully protecting from all problems, this will not work.

   The death of relatives, problems in the family, even a banal refusal to buy “that beautiful toy"harden your child, help the personality to form.
   
   

8. Admit your mistakes
   When you realize that in the end you were wrong, for example, in a discussion with your son or daughter, do not be afraid to admit this to your child. Your authority will not fall, on the contrary, you will raise it by restoring justice or competently admitting defeat.
   
   

Every responsible parent cares. This topic is so vast that an entire book (and more than one) could be devoted to it. However, there are basic principles derived from many years of research by doctors, psychologists, therapists, and educators that everyone should be aware of.

The upbringing of twins should be reduced to the search for individuality. For example, do not dress children in the same clothes. At least constantly.

Encourage mutual support in children, always emphasize that in this world only they have each other. This will reduce jealousy, resentment and improve the atmosphere in the family.

I myself. Another facet of the problem of how to raise children is the issue of independence. This quality is one of the main advantages modern man. But, unfortunately, many parents make this mistake: at a time when the child is psychologically ready to try, express himself, imitate adults in order to feel independent, they often stop these attempts without noticing it. And all because while the child is trying, he makes a bunch of mistakes (crushes, litters, spills), and everything has to be redone for him. And from his help more problems. But despite this, you should not give in to the desire to drive your child away (take away the rag when he tries to wash the floor, smearing the dirt). Patiently show your child how to do it right.

How to raise children? This task, perhaps the most difficult in our life, requires a lot of effort, self-sacrifice and constant attention to our children. The main thing in education is to give, teach to get out of difficult situations, value yourself and achieve high goals.

How to properly raise children? - This question worries many parents, because every conscious parent wants to raise their child to be kind, reasonable, loving, spiritual and moral, conscious, etc.

Parents are the first teachers in a child's life, and thanks to them, his worldview and worldview are formed, they do not just feed him and take care of him, they teach him to love, think, live. Each mistake in education will be reflected in his whole life.

“Don’t raise your children, they will still look like you. Educate yourself!"

Video about how to raise children WRONG!

Any conscious parent knows that children absorb everything they see in the people around them and then manifest it themselves. Scientific studies prove that up to 3 years old children are 100% hypnotizable and, like a video camera, record all incoming information into the subconscious, and then after 3 years they begin to reproduce the information received in their words and actions, so it is very important to consciously approach the issue of raising a child up to 3 years! With particular vigilance, monitor what information (the speech of parents and other people, music, films, cartoons, pictures, etc.) enters the mind of the child.

On this subject, there is a wonderful book by Masaru Ibuka, It's Too Late After 3, which I recommend you read. For your convenience, I have placed this book at the end of the article.

Now I want to show you a video of one special teacher, Chris Ulmer, who praises his children before each lesson, thereby instilling positive qualities in them.

How to properly raise children!

This strategy of teaching and raising children in my opinion is very effective. After all, often we unconsciously say to our children phrases like “Why are you so stupid?”, “Are you stupid or what?”, “Don’t you hear me?” - with such phrases we inspire the child with these programs and he becomes stupid, stupid and does not hear you.

Instead of telling children:

1. "Don't do that"
2. "Do not go there"
3. "DO NOT Eat This"
4. "DO NOT touch it"

tell your kids like this:

1. “do it like this because…”
2. “it’s better to go here because it’s dangerous there”
3. "It's better to eat healthy food"
4. "Please put it back, it's for adults only"

Even children under the age of 1 are able to understand you, so explain to them, talk to them like an adult and raise your children consciously!

Be a good example for your children!

I recommend that you study 2 education courses from Viktor Fedotov:

In this lecture, the following main mistakes are discussed in detail:

• Insufficient knowledge of parents and the lack of subjects at school in the physiology and psychology of the body, social adaptation and sanity in general.
• The absence of the formation of the authority of parents in a child under the age of five.
• Incorrect setting of goals in a young family (a focus on welfare to the detriment of education).
• Decrease in control and decrease in the amount of love for a child in adolescence.
• Lack of knowledge about the principles proper nutrition(both food and information).
• Lack of understanding of the dangers of watching TV by toddlers even in infancy.
• An attempt to make the child dependent on the fact that his parents raised him, fed him and taught him.
• upbringing in incomplete family(in view of the lack of examples of relations between a man and a woman, the energy of the opposite sex, and other factors).
• Emphasis on the treatment of sick children, and not on prevention and recovery. Incorrect formation of an opinion about a father who does not take part in the upbringing of his son, which leads to low self-esteem of the son, etc.

Who at least once attended Viktor Fedotov's lecture knows about his UNIQUE PRINCIPLE approach to any issues of our lives. This person penetrates deep into the essence of the problem, sometimes revealing it to us from completely unexpected facets. We listen and each time we are amazed at the wisdom and clarity of this amazing person. It is unlikely that anyone will doubt that the topic of raising children requires a deep and careful approach.

All new parents need to know how to properly raise a child from birth. The opinion that it is necessary to raise a baby at a time when he is already walking and talking is quite erroneous. It is on what foundation is laid in the character of a child in the period up to 1 year that his further development and perception of the world and society will depend.

Conventionally, the development of a baby in the first year of life is divided into 4 stages, each for 3 months. One can only imagine how much strength it will take for the crumbs to learn so much in just 1 year. Therefore, a huge responsibility falls on the shoulders of parents, advice from pediatricians and child psychologists will help here.

The first stage of a child's development lasts from the moment of birth until he is 3 months old. It is at this time that it is very important to help the child get used to the world around him, hygiene, to teach the first skills of communication and sensory perception.

In the first weeks of life, the baby does not need anything other than satisfying the feeling of hunger, wellness And sound sleep. However, then there comes a moment when, in addition to basic desires, the child begins to look around, studying and observing. It is important from this moment to teach him to contemplate everything with his head held high, for which you need to turn him over on his stomach, even if this causes protest. Over time, this will become a good habit.

Particular attention must be paid to hygiene. Already from the cradle, you need to teach your baby to wash every morning. Even a simple diaper change will gradually accustom the child to cleanliness, and over time, he himself will show that the time has come for hygiene procedures.

Involved in the development and upbringing of children early age. To do this, all procedures should be accompanied by gentle conversations, singing songs. Each of your actions needs to be voiced, commented on, told what exactly is happening to him right now. A smile in a conversation will lay the foundations of a culture of communication and make a child happier.

Do not forget that it is from birth that you need to accustom the baby to independence. To do this, you need to teach him to be alone in the crib for some time, cooing and playing with his first toys. Hanging carousels are perfect for this, which both entertain and develop the child's visual and sensory skills.

Second stage of development

When the baby reaches 3 months, the second stage of development begins. At this stage, babies begin to learn in depth to talk, communicate, distinguish things around them. It is very difficult for them to do this on their own, so it is on the shoulders of mom and dad that the responsibility for such important period growth and education.

It is very important at this time to include music for the child, especially classical music and children's songs. In addition, you need to pay the baby's attention to the sounds of the surrounding nature, while accompanying all this with comments.

It is necessary to talk with the baby as often as possible, especially during active game. Be sure to include toys in the form of animals, while trying to involve him in the game Who says what. Already in such young age children begin to distinguish colors, shapes, materials by touch. In addition, they actively begin to study their body, so it is very important to pronounce the names of body parts during the daily developmental massage. Do not forget that all conversations with the baby should be conducted in a gentle and affectionate tone.

Do not forget about the importance of physical development in children 3-6 months. At the beginning of this period, all babies already hold their heads tightly, try to concentrate their attention on some object and try to grab it and hold it tightly. But a strong desire to learn everything new makes the baby rise, try to sit down in order to see as much space as possible around him. They increasingly demand attention to themselves, ask for hands, it is already much more difficult for them to lie in one place for a long time.

An important place at this stage of development of children is occupied by toys. Balls, soft cubes with multi-colored pictures, rubber squeakers will help parents to bring up tactile, sensory and auditory reactions in the baby. And teethers will help to cope with the discomfort caused by the appearance of the first teeth.

Growing up after reaching half a year

Methods of raising children of six months of age are radically moving into active phase. At this age, babies begin to sit down, learn to crawl, try to get up and even walk. Very often it is at this stage, if they do not know the rules of raising young children.

It seems to adults that the safety of the crumbs is the most important priority, while forgetting that encouraging curiosity, exploratory manifestations is no less important.

Constant bans will put the baby in a dead end. It would be more correct to allow him to fully explore everything around him, but to remove all dangerous objects out of reach. Cabinets and shelves should be filled with toys, and not locked and constantly walking for a child, repeating the words of prohibitions.

It's time to start potty training your offspring, sitting him down after sleeping, feeding, walking. Over time, it will become clear to him what they want from him, and it is quite possible that soon he himself will begin to give signs of natural needs.

Hygiene rules during this period begin to include the mandatory washing of hands before eating, after the street. In addition, the formation of a culture of cleanliness at this age is possible through teaching brushing teeth. To do this, in our time, there are special toothbrushes that are put on the finger and, at the same time as cleaning, perfectly massage the gums.

Since the baby is already sitting up and most parents are starting to introduce supplemental food, bibs should be used. At the same time, verbally it is necessary to pronounce negative sides dirty clothes and positive sides cleanliness and neatness.

Also very important at this age play activity- with its help the child learns the world. Relevant games are patty and cuckoo, the study of parts of the face. You need to start by studying them on your favorite toy, and then searching for own face. Games with toys will become more difficult: it's time to explain to the baby that the ball can roll, the wheels of the car are spinning. He will be interested in receiving a musical gift as a gift. Entertainment Center, toys from different material and size. Bathing toys will be of particular interest.

Period from 9 months to 1 year

Features of raising young children, especially when they are almost 1 year old, are primarily in physical development. Toddlers are already starting to walk, holding on to objects or mother's hand, they may be able to get up from a sitting position. Although very often after the baby has begun to crawl, he loses interest in walking on his feet. In this case, it is the responsibility of the parents to push him to the desire to stand and walk. Toys that need to be held with both hands will help in this, the need to reach them from a standing position.

Closer to the age of one, children actively respond to conversations with adults. have a positive effect on them mental development playing with other children of the same age.

The toys are getting more complex. Folding pyramids will help to understand the difference between colors, sizes, develop fine motor skills hands, tactile sensations. Unexpected finds cause joy, and the child begins to understand and desire surprises, as in the case of playing with nesting dolls.

The kid is already ready to perceive such words as impossible, bad and good. It is important to point out to the child those things that are forbidden, to encourage good behavior. You need to teach your child to love by example. the world, animals and other children. In the case when children fight, you need to strictly explain that this is bad, you can’t do this. The main thing in this case is the persistence and obligatory reaction of the child to the words of adults.

Proper upbringing of children from birth is an important basis for the further development of a full-fledged member of society. Home