How to behave with your husband: practical advice and recommendations from psychologists. How to behave with your husband so that he is afraid of losing you: advice and recommendations from psychologists

“A young wife must not forget that she is not alone now. Relationships are destroyed by indifference, when a man returns home, but they don’t meet him, no one rejoices at him. By the way, that's why men get dogs. Or lovers...

Men don't take hints. Problems begin when a woman's fantasies begin to drastically differ from reality.

For example, a woman is waiting at home for her husband, who, on his way home from work, will drop into a flower shop and bring her huge bouquet roses. But he doesn't. How are events developing further?

The woman, of course, takes offense and sits, sighing nervously. The husband tries to find out what happened. But the wife thinks that he himself should guess. But he doesn't realize. There is a scandal here and the whole evening is ruined.

- Strange, but it is better not to discuss serious issues with a hungry husband.

- A man himself should decide how it will be better for him and a woman should not do it for him. He is an adult and lived before that without a wife all these years. So let him decide what to wear, where to go, etc. With her decision, which was imposed, a woman infringes on the freedom of her husband. And men don't like it. Therefore, before deciding something, a woman should think about whether it is her problem?

You can't force a man. There are women who demand the fulfillment of their desires, if not yesterday, then this very second. And it does not matter to her at all, the man is tired and does not care about his plans. Drop everything and do as your wife asks. Maybe a man will fulfill all the requirements, but up to a certain point. And at that very moment it will explode.

- A wife should not be a bore. The constant lamentations about a broken cistern, a leaky faucet, and an uncleaned Christmas tree nothing good will come of it. Women are naturally very cunning, so why not use your gift?

- You don't need to reach out. The man began to do something in the house, the woman should go to another room and not go in with her advice if she doesn’t want to receive an answer: “do it yourself if you don’t like it!”

- Can't be manipulated. It happens in a fit of anger, the wife says that she will go to her mother, her friend and begins to pack things. In the process of packing her things, she thinks that he will come now, but he does not go. It must have been like that with every one. There are two options for resolving the situation. First - the husband himself will come and ask not to leave. The second - the woman will go to her mother, and the man will not stop her just because he thinks: since she decided so, let her go.

- No matter how insulting it may be, one should not stoop to dirty insults during a quarrel. Sooner or later you'll have to put up with it, and hurtful words will be remembered for a long time and in the next conflict, resentment will manifest itself with new force. And each time it will be more difficult to put up, conflicts will become more protracted.

“Husband should not be denied sex. He also got married in order to have stable sexual relations. Health problems need to be addressed with a doctor and the husband should be aware of them. Well, if a woman simply does not enjoy intimacy with her husband, then let her turn to a sex therapist.

And in no case should you use sex to achieve some of your goals and achieve concessions with it. Such manipulations are unlikely to lead to something good. Many women stepped on this rake.

- Do not poison your husband's life with your jealousy and suspicious questions. Even worse is quietly checking your phone and rummaging through your pockets. And if not a single clue is found, thoughts of a carefully hidden crime come into my head.

All problems can be solved by talking about them. In almost a hundred percent of cases, this rule works. There are two exceptions to the remaining percentage. In the first case, you need to change your attitude to the situation. For example, almost every woman simply hates when men's socks are scattered around the apartment, and nags her husband for this, scolds, takes offense. But if a man has no other shortcomings, let him have at least one and he is not as terrible as women think. The second case is extreme. Get divorced if the attitude to the current situation cannot be changed.

How to behave with your husband? The question is strictly individual, but these tips should not be neglected.

What can you allow your man, and what can not? How to behave with your husband: in company, alone, in bed? Every woman has thought about this question more than once. Dear, you need to find a middle ground that will suit both. Thus, the frequency of internal conflicts will be reduced, mutual understanding and harmony will reign in relations. Consider the most common mistakes in couples relationships.

Errors:

1. Of course, each couple has an individual case, how to deal with your husband which cannot be compared with other people's relationships. “My friend’s boyfriend treats her with such awe, respect and love,” a woman can say to her husband and will immediately receive an answer: “So then go to this guy of your friend!” Men cannot be compared with others, for their halves they must be one and only.

2. Carefully consider all prohibitions. How much does a woman allow her man? This can be judged on the basis of how much the husband allows his wife. Usually by doing this, he requires exactly the same attitude from her. For example, he does not limit her in anything, he allows her to walk everywhere with her friends and spend a lot of free time outside of her presence. Accordingly, with feminine hand a man will demand the same behavior in relation to himself, and if a woman calls him 20 times in an hour, this will only cause irritation.

3. How to behave with your husband if he often spends time with friends? You shouldn't be persistent. If a man really wants to go to some bar with friends, while not confronting his wife with a fact, but asking her permission, you should give him consent. Otherwise, the mood will be spoiled for both, the man will be aggressive and depressed, and the next time, in a similar case, he will simply begin to lie that he has important business or a business meeting scheduled for this time.

Strict "no"

Keep in mind the rule of the golden mean. Somewhere a man needs a break from home and family, moral relief and communication with friends, and he cannot be denied this. But if such “gatherings” go beyond all the limits of what is permitted (for example, a husband comes home too late after a bar or sauna or does not come at all), then such moments must be stopped immediately. Perhaps it is worth discussing in advance the conditions of his trips with friends, discussing what does not suit you.

The husband must take into account women's opinion concerning separate rest. How to behave with your husband: what tone to speak? This should not be done persistently, with the utmost care when choosing suitable words and intonation. It is best to explain to a man in an accessible way what such parties are fraught with, to give a look at the situation that has occurred. feminine look". It is important to remember that the more and groundlessly a woman puts prohibitions on a man, the stronger will be his desire to do everything the other way around.

An approach

Every man needs special approach. A woman finds him only over the years family life. But there are cases that will be unpleasant for any of the men:

1. Distrust. It just manifests itself in excessive control - frequent calls, unnecessary questions, reading messages on the phone and in social networks. Of course, most girls and women do this, but some do it so carefully that a man does not even have the thought that his lover controls or checks him in some way. You need to be smarter, for example, by finding suspicious correspondence with an unknown person, do not bother her husband with questions, but pretend as if nothing happened, and quietly observe what is happening further.

2. . You should never show jealousy to a man if he somehow looked at a stranger passing by in a wrong way or talked very kindly on the phone with a friend. Thus, you can lose feminine dignity in his eyes.

3. Demanding. Men do not like domineering and demanding women. Woman for that and smarter than men, to achieve his cunning and tricks, and not go ahead, arranging tantrums and scandals.

Women's happiness, with a competent and wise approach, is in the hands of the woman herself, and any man will become what a woman makes him.

The lion's share of quarrels couples arises due to excessive control by one partner and insufficient attention by the other. As a rule, a man suffers from excessive guardianship of his beloved, and a woman is offended when she does not receive every minute participation from her half. Girls feel the lack of attention as a lack of love.

He and she perceive differently family relationships. Regardless of the strength of feelings for you, a man will never want to give up gatherings with friends and going to football. Women, on the contrary, tend to rush into relationships with their heads, forget about friends and entertainment, where a loved one does not participate. This creates a painful dissonance.

First Golden Rule: to avoid problems - slow down with guardianship. Don't focus on your man 24 hours a day, better find yourself two or three hobbies that will take free time. While your husband is sitting in a bar with friends, you go to sports, to a beauty salon, meet girlfriends, sign up for advanced training courses, trainings ... So you will not only leave a man a few hours a day of free time without your calls and SMS, but you will also improve yourself externally and internally. Believe me, a man will never want to lose a beautiful self-sufficient woman.

Support him

Relationships need balance and harmony, so do not rush to extremes. Have we convinced you not to overprotect your man? Great, but do not forget to call (not often, once a day is enough!) and ask how he is doing and if he wants to keep you company, for example, in the gym? Now you are equal partners, halves of one whole. Ask about his victories and failures and, if necessary, provide support. Men will never share their failures with friends, which is why sometimes they need the help of their beloved so much.

The second golden rule: be there for your loved one in moments of victory and defeat. Men never want to lose a girl who understands and accepts them the way they are.

Stay attractive

Many women stop caring for themselves after marriage. Think back to a time when you wanted to get the attention of your partner. How many new dresses and blouses have appeared in your wardrobe? Surely, almost every day you did your hair at the hairdresser, put on heels, sacrificing convenience for the sake of beauty? If you still stand in front of the mirror for an hour every day, you should not worry, but if the time that you used to take care of yourself is spent on washing, ironing and “rum women” - slow down. Rethink your daily routine. A man, of course, will appreciate the care, but, first of all, he wants to see you as beautiful as before.

Third golden rule: Be always with stylish makeup And flawless manicure. beautiful woman a man is afraid to lose.

Don't be jealous!

Women sometimes over-romanticize self-directed jealousy as evidence of love. At the same time, they can terrorize a man for a long time and stubbornly if they have to experience jealousy. Neither one nor the other helps to build a relationship. Having decided to provoke a guy to jealousy, be prepared for the most unexpected consequences. Some men may get really angry, others will consider you frivolous, and still others will consider jealousy as evidence of neglect. It's better not to joke with jealousy.

Unlike women, without exception, all men despise such a manifestation of love and are irritated if the woman they love turns out to be jealous.

Psychologists say that most often the cause of jealousy is self-doubt. That is why it seems to a woman that her man is about to find someone better and starts playing detective.

Fourth golden rule: focus on yourself, visit as many cosmetic procedures, so much you need in order to feel the most beautiful. And jealousy will go away.

Let him feel needed

Every man strives to show his soulmate how necessary and good he is. You can play along a little with his noble aspirations and from time to time ask for small, and not very, services. If a man is well versed in technology, call him to repair the toaster. If you call a master at home, then your young man may perceive this as an insult to dignity. Therefore, before doing anything, tell him about the problem, let the beloved decide for himself whether he can handle it on his own or need help.

If your soulmate doesn't have the skills to solve a problem, don't tell him: "You're a man..." Your young man may be a professional in one area, but not understand another. And that's okay, because we're all human. Remember, this type of reproach makes a man feel weak. In response, you can get an even more painful attack, because you will hurt his male ego.

Fifth golden rule: be smart and use strengths loved one, tactfully silent about the weak! Compromise relationships are usually the most persistent and durable. Men are afraid of losing a woman with whom they feel strong and courageous.

Be financially understanding

Another sore spot many men - financial well-being. Criticism of his work, salary, reproaches regarding the cost of gifts and the like often lead to a complete collapse of the relationship.

Sixth golden rule: refrain from criticism financial position your chosen one. If you are not satisfied with his income, then discuss on family council how you can improve your well-being. A man will never want to lose a woman who knows that money is much cheaper than love.

Do not spray on resentment and anger

It can be difficult to restore the former warmth in communication even after several days of mutual insults, not to mention longer quarrels. Equal relationships are the key to success and harmony.

The seventh golden rule: if you love your chosen one, then learn to accept it, and not the idealized image that you drew in your head during the months when he courted you. A man will appreciate it and be afraid to lose you.

How should a husband and wife behave? And with the former, and with the pregnant, and with the young, and with the elderly wife, you must first of all behave like a gentleman.

However, this is not always enough. What else needs to be done, how to behave with your wife in order to keep your mutual love for many decades? The question is not easy, but there are answers to it.

Be both gentle and firm

What does it mean? Very simple - you must take care of your spouse, be gentle and affectionate with her, but at the same time show firmness of character when you need to defend your opinion. Have you decided something? Think it's correct solution? So convince your spouse of this - firmly, but not rudely. Use gingerbread more often. Do you want your wife to cook your favorite dish from your mom's arsenal? Praise her culinary skills, tell her that it will not be difficult for her to cook a dish for you. And in general, try to praise your wife more often, because in any person you can find a bunch of virtues, albeit seemingly insignificant.

Distribute responsibilities fairly

A woman, coming home from work, does housework, and her husband is resting, saying that he is even more tired - this, unfortunately, is a common picture. But isn't it better to help your wife, and then relax together? This will only benefit your family relationships. Done general cleaning together, and you can have fun together at least until the end of the day - go to the park, ride a Ferris wheel to look at the romantic picture of the evening city from a bird's eye view, go to the cinema, do something else. So behave with his wife is not so much possible as necessary.

Don't criticize

Even criticism can be turned into useful good advice. So you don’t need to criticize your spouse, it’s better to give her good advice. By criticizing you only destroy your relationship and underestimate your wife's self-esteem. After all, a husband should also be a good adviser.

Don't forget the holidays

Drive everything into your head or write it down in your favorite notebook memorable dates, especially your wedding anniversary and her parents' birthdays. The more often you will be reminded of the upcoming memorable day, the better - the girl should feel that her husband, that is, you, is attentive to her. After all, you remember important dates for her and make her happy these days to the maximum, and not only these.

Be Reliable

When a man positions himself as a real leader and support for his beloved woman, she feels comfortable with him. If there are any problems, try to solve them on your own, always keep your word, no matter who you give it to. It’s not bad to grow muscles in order to protect your spouse if something happens.

Be everything to her

If you will be gentle husband and at the same time a passionate lover for his wife, she will appreciate you and your family relationships even more. Active and varied sex life- one of mandatory requirements to a man so that he can be called an ideal husband. This is how you should treat your wife.

If you want to be not just a wife for your husband, but a good life partner, then you should figure out how to behave with your husband. It depends not only on you, but also on your husband. Good wife must anticipate and correctly determine what her life partner needs and help him achieve these goals. But it is very important to remember that marriage is a partnership, so you have the right to expect your husband to make efforts for your joint well-being.

But now it's about you.

Qualities of an Ideal Wife

Probably every man would like to have an ideal wife. But you need to figure out what it means - a good wife? Many of these qualities that will be discussed are inherent in women by nature. It is quite possible to cultivate in yourself those qualities that you lack.

• Ease and pleasantness in communication. Never be rude to your husband, children, friends. A good wife in communication with her husband, always meets her husband with a smile and maintains a pleasant tone of voice.
• Respect for husband. If you want your husband to respect you, treat him the same way. A good wife will never allow herself to humiliate her husband in public, and should also be alone.
• Relationship and mutual understanding. Never deceive each other, nothing good will come of it. Find at least half an hour to communicate. A good relationship between husband and wife builds trust and the bond between them becomes stronger. In the decision family matters Always consult with your husband.
• Support. When a husband is pursued by failures, at this moment he needs your understanding and support. Support him at all stages of his career and life. Praise your husband sincerely, and be proud of his achievements. Believe me, if you do this, then your husband will do the same with you.
• Give him freedom. Like you, a man can have his friends, colleagues, hobbies. Do not stop him if he wants to meet colleagues or friends. Do not interfere, otherwise this causes irritation in a man and a desire to do everything in spite of protest.
• Don't drink. No man likes to be moralized. But many women think it is the only way make her husband do something. Such behavior can worsen your relationship, or even lead to a breakup.
• Clearly express your needs and feelings. Do not expect your husband to guess your desires and thoughts, because he is not a psychic. If you have any need, tell him about it. The ability to express one's feelings calmly and clearly without hints is what is required of a good wife in the understanding of a man.
• Make surprises. Men also love displays of attention, surprises. It is not necessary that your surprises be expensive and complicated, it is enough to put love and soul into them. And if you do not skimp on surprises for your husband, then you know how to behave with your husband.
• Talk more about love. All men love to be praised and thanked. They also like to hear "I love you." Give the mind gifts, let it be inexpensive thing, but what he definitely likes or will be useful.
• Loyalty, honesty. Much can be forgiven, but not deceit or betrayal.
• Home comfort. A man will appreciate you if you constantly maintain order in the house and keep all things in order and clean.
• In bed make him happy. critical role plays in marriage sexual intimacy. It is critical to your husband's happiness. If you take this happiness away from your husband, then he will go where he can find it. Without intimacy in your relationship, a man becomes irritable. He will feel rejected and stop feeling for you. tender feelings. remember, that love relationship make you closer. IN Everyday life do not be greedy in the manifestation of feelings, come up, hug, kiss, stroke on the cheek.

Now that you have learned what men want from their wives, you have learned how to deal with your husband and how to make him happy.

How to be the perfect wife

1. Always prepare to meet your husband.
2. The food must be ready before the husband arrives.
3. Rejoice at the return of your husband with a smile.
4. First let your husband speak out, and then you tell what you wanted.
5. Do not complain to your husband right on the doorstep. Let him eat and rest.
6. Don't criticize.
7. Learn to apologize and admit your mistakes.

If you want your husband to be happy and always happy to return home where he is loved and expected, do not forget about how to behave with your husband correctly. And remember that the happiness of your family is in your hands, it is the woman who is the keeper of the hearth and family well-being. It is a woman who should be able to regulate the situation in the house. Be happy!