How can a young mother take care of her emotional state and mental health during the period of caring for a baby? Features of the physical and psychological state of a woman after childbirth

The benefits of breastfeeding are endless. Unfortunately, now many women, especially young women, refuse breastfeeding in favor of adapted mixtures under various pretexts. It seems to a woman that she does not have enough milk, and the child screams from hunger, or that she does not have enough fat and nutritious milk. It is generally accepted that milk can be lost if mommy is a lot of nervous. Yes, and the baby is transmitted stressful condition mothers literally “with milk”, therefore, allegedly, during a period of stress it is better to stop breast-feeding. Is it really?

How does stress affect breast milk production?

Scientists give an unequivocal answer to this question: “No way!”. That is, even during periods of extreme stress breast milk continues to be produced in the same quantity. However, stress affects the hormone oxytocin, which is responsible for the release of milk from the breast. So the situation when mommy gets nervous - and the baby starts crying at the breast, because he doesn’t have enough milk, is really quite common. Does this mean that in such a situation it is necessary to supplement the child with a mixture as soon as possible? After all, in this way we will only contribute to the reduction of milk production! On the contrary, we must try to calm down, relax - and breastfeeding will be fully restored. In such a situation, the mother needs to remember: there is enough milk in the breast, just the child will not be able to get it until the mother calms down.

Impact of breastfeeding on maternal stress

Sometimes the opposite question arises: how does breastfeeding affect the course of stress in the mother. And here scientists give the answer in favor of the baby. Even the most severe stress in a woman who is breastfeeding a baby is easier than in all others. On the one hand, a woman is aware of her responsibility to the baby, so she simply cannot afford to "plunge into the abyss of suffering." Where her friend in misfortune will give the baby to relatives-nannies and begin to selflessly suffer, the nursing mother will put the baby to her breast several times a day and completely immerse herself in communication with the baby. And stimulation of the breast and nipple during sucking launches into female body a number of interrelated processes. Those women who constantly breastfeed a baby during feeding (especially after the first few months of uncertainty) feel peace and tenderness, which leaves no chance for stress!

Does mother's stress affect the baby during breastfeeding?

Although it is commonly believed that the child literally "sucks up with milk" all the experiences of the mother, but this is absolutely not true! In fact, breast milk does not and cannot contain any substances that cause stress in the baby. Research by scientists confirms that maternal stress often affects the behavior and well-being of the child, but this has nothing to do with breastfeeding. Rather, the nervous behavior of the mother, the smells she emits, the intonation of the voice - that's what makes the baby nervous and capricious.

But the influence breastfeeding the stress on the child is colossal! The very birth of a baby is already a serious test for him. And only physical contact with the mother, her warm breasts, her smell, breast sucking can to some extent help the baby to get used to this alien world. As the baby gets older, the need for breast milk is no less. What is the easiest way to calm a baby when he feels bad, scared, tired? Of course, give him a breast! No wonder now pediatricians advise breastfeeding a child for at least two years, and some even recommend keeping breastfeeding up to five years! Data from British scientists who conducted a study of more than 30,000 children indicate that breastfeeding affects not only stress, but also intellectual development baby, his socialization and even his entire future life, increasing by almost a quarter the chances of successful career and personal life.

You can often hear the alarmed stories of mothers that their children throw unreasonable tantrums, get nervous a lot, and may even show aggression. In many cases, this can be explained by the unstable emotional state of the mother during pregnancy. Oddly enough, from the very first day the baby appears inside a woman, her every word and action affects the baby. Alas, this has been repeatedly proven by researchers.

Stages of pregnancy

Since ancient times, a woman in a position was treated in a special way. She was not allowed to get nervous and tired, provided maximum comfort and all conveniences. Today, in the frantic pace of life, this is often forgotten. Absolutely in vain. Turns out, intrauterine development leaves an imprint on the further development of the child.

Divided into three trimesters:

first trimester - from the first to 12 weeks of pregnancy;
the second trimester - from 13 to 27, the fetus grows and develops, all systems and organs are laid in it;
third trimester - from 28 to 40 weeks, all organs and systems finally mature for independent functioning.

The first and third trimesters are considered the most difficult. It is during this period that a woman should pay maximum attention to both her physical comfort and psychological. Doctors say that from the age of 3 months the baby feels touch. He hears speech and feels emotions. If they are negative, he reacts in a certain way. From affectionate speech, the baby calms down, from aggressive speech - it becomes restless. The kid can even memorize phrases that are often repeated. From 20 weeks he shows his character. If you don't like something, you can turn away. These facts have been confirmed in many studies.

How to provide an unborn baby emotional peace

Everyone knows that during pregnancy future mom should avoid showdowns, screams, scandals, unpleasant information. Bad mood and the nerves are transmitted to the baby through the circulatory system. The expectant mother's breathing quickens, her heart begins to beat faster. The same thing happens with the baby. Why injure the child's psyche in the womb? If you follow the following tips, the child will be born psychologically healthy and intellectually developed:

No stress and scandals. It is necessary to decide: is it so important to sort things out if a child can suffer because of this? All conflictogens must be left in the past - without a shadow of regret.
From the age of three months, the child feels touch and hears sounds from the outside. It is necessary to stroke the stomach more often, sing songs - a pleasant melody will positively affect the development of intelligence in the future.
The unborn child already has a certain sense of taste. He can like sweet or, conversely, salty. That is why it is advised to cook during pregnancy only tasty and healthy food, no spicy and fatty foods, only light and nutritious, those that are drawn to.

Beginning with fourth month life inside the mother, the baby is well aware of what happens during outside world. He begins to feel his desirability, the attitude of his parents, their relationship to each other. Someone who has a negative prenatal experience is more likely to carry the emotional discomfort into their life after birth. Such feelings remain for life. That's why it's so important to focus on how you feel during pregnancy. There is nothing more important than comfort own child, no troubles in life are worth his suffering.

The time in the history of parenting is coming to an end when prolonged breastfeeding (for example, up to 1.5 years) caused surprise and even disapproval of others, and an increasing number of people give up under the pressure of the phrase "recommended World Organization Healthcare” and accepts what yesterday seemed at least strange. And an increasing number of mothers are prolonging the period of breastfeeding and even becoming adherents of self-weaning of the child. And now, when the decision is made and you can sigh “Ugh! Well, that's it, we feed! ”, The time has come to take a closer look at this very GW and understand its intricacies, psychological moments. Because long-term breastfeeding is, as has already been proven, good for both mother and baby, but comfortable and harmonious breastfeeding that brings mutual pleasure is a bar that many of today's pioneer mothers have yet to take.

Mother and child initially exist in a kind of symbiosis, and although the baby has already physically separated from the mother, the emotional and psychological separation is still in its infancy and will continue until adolescence. In the meantime, it’s not for nothing that mothers, even in speech, often do not separate themselves from the child, saying “we”, “we ate”, “we took a walk”.

Infants extremely sensitive to the state of the mother, her emotional mood. They still continue to “live her life” and feed on her “juices”, although not through the umbilical cord, but from the chest.

There is also an opinion that babies are sensitive until a certain time and not only to the mother herself, but to people in general. Since ancient times, it was not recommended to show a newborn within a month after birth to strangers, it was believed that he could be jinxed. The evil eye acts especially strongly on impressionable and sensitive natures (a child is 10 times more impressionable than any adult). Yes, and mothers themselves, purely intuitively, tend to retire at first, avoid traveling with babies in public transport. And the well-known founder of rebirthing (one of the methods of psychotherapy) L. Orr says that children have extrasensory sensitivity and generally does not recommend showing the child even to relatives for as long as possible ...

However, any mother who has even a slight inclination to self-observation will confirm that children very subtly feel the change in her emotional state and instantly react with a change in theirs.

Breastfeeding is not only a process of saturation, it is a sacrament, and the paintings of nursing mothers by famous artists speak about this without further ado ... When a mother feeds her child, she herself becomes for some time a Madonna - loving and accepting her child without any conditions, absolutely and fully.

None of the mothers will deny that breastfeeding is the communication of a mother with a baby ... folk wisdom(and speaking psychologically, the collective unconscious) says: "to absorb with mother's milk." More and more modern authors, closely studying the intricacies of the interaction between mother and baby, believe that during breastfeeding, the child receives not only useful material for your body, but important information necessary for his soul: the emotional state of the mother is transmitted to him, and even her experience of the entire universe. For best contact with a child, they are advised to retire for this sacrament and focus on the child and their feelings. And some Orthodox priests invite mothers to pray before each feeding.

In this regard, it is interesting to note one recently made discovery by the Japanese scientist Masaro Emoto. In general, it has long been known that water is a substance capable of storing and transmitting information, and the latest discoveries of this scientist, which are becoming increasingly famous, show this shockingly clearly. Here is how one Internet publication talks about his research:
"Masaro Emoto investigated droplets different water under a powerful microscope and recorded the results photographically. He studied how different sounds and even words affect the structure of water. Beethoven's music, folk, hard rock were included in the laboratory. Then the water was frozen, and it was found that the music of Beethoven and folk songs led to the formation of geometrically correct, beautiful snowflakes, and hard rock - to a disorderly heap of needles of ice.

Experiences "linguistic" were generally on the verge of fantasy! Paper with printed words was pasted onto a container of water: “love”, “mother”, “God”, “I will kill you”. It turned out that even printed information is perceived by water! The words "mother", "love" were reflected in the beauty and correctness of the snowflakes, and their shape was identical. The word "God" was accompanied by the formation of snowflakes with ... the face of a man in the center. The phrase "I'll kill you" led to the formation of ugly snowflakes, as if blown up from the inside.

A person is 80% water, and then how much is mother's milk? Milk "hears" all the thoughts of the mother and perceives her feelings and, of course, passes on to the child. Apparently, milk is a very powerful carrier of information about the state of the mother, it is not surprising that babies are so eager for him, and especially if they are worried or afraid of something. After all, a mother is always a reminder of that serene state when the baby was still one with her.

It is very possible that many difficult moments breastfeeding, legs grow out of this situation: breast rejection, which occurs in babies in the first months of life, breast bites, which become for some mothers real problem when the baby gets teeth.
Why is he biting? Maybe because mom herself at this moment is angry with someone or something. I don’t think that the child himself is angry with the mother or, moreover, takes revenge on her, most likely he just, like a sensitive radar, glorifies the mother’s mood and, apparently, enters into similar condition, and clenching of the jaws involuntarily occurs when experiencing anger, sort of like clenching fists ...

What happens, the baby is aware of everything that happens to mom? But after all, mom has so many worries and anxieties, and it’s not without reason. And so you want to protect your child from everything bad - for this you try! But what a trap you fall into - the trap of your own efforts!
How to use this information so that it will benefit and serve the parent, and not become a reason for another headache? After all, mothers are people who are fairly loaded with worries and moments of feeding for many - this is one of the few opportunities to briefly escape from worries, relax or think about something of their own, but it turns out that here you have to work hard - and not work too hard for long! I want to warn you against such an attitude. Information is pouring in from all sides about what an ideal mother should be, and how can you not give your child the best! And now the parent has to tighten up ... but is it good for the child, does the family benefit? In fact, what a child really needs is happy mom, and not ideal, and therefore, most of all, mothers really need to take care of themselves and give themselves more love, and not at all strain even more to be more the best mom. Let me give you advice on how to deal with this information that I offer you. Do not try to force yourself to control your thoughts, feelings during breastfeeding, do not force yourself when you feel that you cannot be in a good state of mind - violence against yourself will only aggravate the situation. Let everything go as it does at such a moment, and don't blame yourself for being weak. When will you be in the mood, oh! Here is where you can practice. At this favorable moment, think about the fact that your baby is very close to you, maybe even closer than you thought, think about all the good things that you would like to convey to him. About the secret that lies in the depths of your soul and is prepared especially for your dear child. About what you really really want and what gives you strength in difficult moments in your parent path. Let this beautiful image appear before you and just stay, bathe in its rays. Think about the fact that your baby is now bathing in these rays with you, and at this very moment you are giving him everything that you dream about. Imagine how the warmth of your soul flows along with your milk. Now your child is at your very heart, and it may not be accidental that it is during breastfeeding that he is closest to his mother’s heart, so let milk flow to him from the chest, and love from the heart. Stay with this image for as long as you want, as long as it will nourish you. And repeat this exercise every time the desire arises.

Let this information help you become more confident and happy parent, and do not focus on the fact that it is not always possible to be in good mood while breastfeeding, but rather be glad that now you know something else that will help you in caring for your treasure.

The emotional instability of a nursing mother in the first place has a bad effect on the health of the baby.

Breastfeeding is a big responsibility.

If a woman decides to breastfeed her baby, then she should carefully monitor her health and lifestyle. Errors in the nutrition of a nursing mother negatively affect the quality of breast milk, from which the baby suffers in the first place. The lack of key vitamins and minerals in breast milk leads to the fact that the baby grows and develops poorly. At the same time, the baby will often get sick, and all from the fact that his body will receive less valuable nutrients and biologically active substances.

However, adherence to the principles of rational nutrition and healthy lifestyle life, this is not all the requirements for a nursing mother. One of the main recommendations of doctors for young mothers is to avoid stress in every possible way. Never underestimate negative impact stress on the body. With emotional stress in the human body, changes occur at the biochemical level. This process involves endocrine and higher nervous activity - the main "orchestrants" that regulate the course of all processes in organs and systems. Therefore, under stress, almost the entire body suffers, including negative changes that are reflected in the quality of breast milk.

Stress hormones and breast milk

As you know, breast milk is produced under the influence of the hormone prolactin. Stress has no effect on prolactin, and the process of milk production itself is not disturbed. However, stress produces increased amount the hormone adrenaline, which in turn suppresses the production of oxytocin. Oxytocin regulates the flow of milk from the breast, and at low concentrations in the blood, this reflex is temporarily impaired.

In addition, stress hormones are able to penetrate into breast milk, and then into the baby's body. The most unpleasant thing they can lead to is digestive disorders in infants. Often with emotional instability in a nursing mother, the baby suffers from increased gas formation in the intestines - intestinal colic, which causes crumbs severe pain. With colic, the baby is very worried, cries loudly, kicks his legs and refuses to eat. In this regard, treatment intestinal colic in babies, it begins with a psychological conversation with a nursing mother, who should avoid stress, because it is the stress of the mother that can be the trigger for the development of intestinal colic in babies.

Dealing with stress

If the cause of your stress is domestic problems, minor conflicts in the family and other minor circumstances, then you can cope with emotional tension on your own, having previously eliminated the source of stress. If the cause of mood swings is deeper, and you are not able to cope with it, then immediately seek help from a qualified psychologist. And it’s better not to put it off, because this is how you first of all take care of your baby.

if your lactation has decreased, then you should not worry about this, because this phenomenon is temporary, and soon everything will be restored;
don't overcool. Let it be warm in the room, drink warm (or hot) tea, milk, this only promotes lactation and helps to calm down. Especially good for stress warm baths with soothing essential oils;
Avoid bright light, and provide yourself with maximum comfort at home: a comfortable chair, your favorite music (quietly), etc.;
put the baby to the breast more often, and spend as much time as possible next to him. Rocking the baby in the chair has a calming effect on both the baby and the mother;
avoid prolonged feelings of hunger. Eat often and in small portions. Hunger also releases adrenaline, which blocks the production of oxytocin;
don't be too hard on yourself. Postpone your affairs for later, and mainly focus on your health.

How to deal with colic?

As mentioned above, with the emotional instability of a nursing mother, the baby may experience colic. Help to deal with this problem natural preparations made on the basis of plant extracts - the so-called Carminativums. One such remedy is the German drug Carminativum Bebinos, which includes extracts of fennel, coriander and chamomile. Fennel has long been used to combat bloating and flatulence. Coriander extract acts as an effective antispasmodic, and chamomile has a pronounced anti-inflammatory and calming effect on the child.

Carminativum Bebinos is available in the form of drops, does not contain sugar and has a pleasant taste. So the kids love it.

Information for the professional activities of medical and pharmaceutical workers. Karminativum Bebinos: RS No. UA/8686/01/01 dated 08/09/2013. Other information at the bottom of the page at the footnote: (1).

Really touching? But, unfortunately, motherhood is accompanied not only by joyful experiences, but also by inevitable problems. This is a hard everyday work that requires a woman of great physical and mental strength.

Olga, 24 years old: After the birth of my daughter, I lived for a whole monthatmothers, husband was in swimming. mom speciallytookleave to help me. ButAllit was also hard out of habit. The baby often cried (especially in the evening), badly sucked her breast. I drank huge amounts of teas with milk, nettle decoction, wild rose and so on. My mother added fuel to the fire: “You don’t have enough milk, you need to supplement with formula, the girl is very thin ...” Because of the endless feedings at night, I slept for three to four hours with breaks. I didn’t want to look at myself in the mirror: my face was swollen, my eyes were dull, my hair was sticking out, my back was hunched over.

A few days later, she began to get annoyed at everyone: at her mother, at her friends for their endless congratulations, and even at her daughter. At the same time, she was madly afraid for the child, listened in a dream - is she breathing? Because of each pimple, she was ready to call a doctor.

What about household problems? We have the fourth floor, a house without an elevator. Each walk with a child is a whole story: first you lower a heavy stroller-cradle in your arms, then you run upstairs after the child. “How are you not afraid to leave the stroller?” the neighbors asked. Afraid! So what to do? After the walk, you drag everything in the reverse order. You won't be able to catch your breath- time to feed the baby. Everything seems to be done quickly, but household chores never end. In addition, my back ached, my legs ached, I constantly wanted to sleep ...

How many children will be born in the world, so many mothers will face the same problems: changes in appearance, unstable mood, fatigue, eternal “lack of sleep”, anxiety for the child. But you never know them, the causes of constant stress for "newly" mothers! What to do?

Sadly, one must be prepared for the fact that at first it will be very difficult. Motherhood is a real test for every woman! Even for the most organized and responsible. But, as they say, forewarned is forearmed. And although the role of a young mother cannot be prepared in advance, some stresses and difficulties can be prevented.

Let's start with the inevitable. It is no longer a secret to anyone that pregnancy, childbirth and postpartum period accompanied by significant changes in the work and even location internal organs, hormonal changes and so on. Fatigue, malaise, mood swings, exacerbation of chronic diseases are the "natural background" of the daily worries of the newly-made mother.

Therefore, first of all, be sure to watch your physical condition. During pregnancy and after childbirth, such troubles as varicose veins, cystitis, and hemorrhoids often appear. Do not be ashamed of your problems and do not hush them up - see a doctor! Even if nothing bothers you, be sure to visit a gynecologist four to six weeks after giving birth. Keep taking your vitamins and eat regularly.

Secondly, rest whenever possible! Do you know what the doctors say? You need to rest before you feel tired. A young mother needs to find time to relax a little; it's difficult, but possible. For example, feed your baby comfortable posture with your feet elevated. If the child falls asleep during the day, lie down and you, putting aside endless household chores. A child needs a calm, affectionate mother!

Another major source of stress is dissatisfaction with their appearance. You make yourself look ugly. Once sometimes brush your teeth, let alone do your hair! Nothing to wear: "pregnant" clothes are big, and the ones you wore before are tight. Girlfriends who come to visit you look like normal people, and you ... The mood is steadily falling.

What can be advised here? Fullness and sagging belly - a temporary phenomenon. If your doctor has allowed you, you can do simple exercises or start to pump the press a little. The pool helps a lot. The most important thing here is to find strength in yourself. For the next six months or a year, say goodbye to long nails and heels. Practical clothes, comfortable shoes, suitable haircut or a hairstyle that does not require long styling - that's what you need. Look through your husband’s wardrobe: there you can find something for yourself matching shirts or T-shirts. Add to this inexpensive knitted trousers. Your home outfit is ready!

Many young mothers greatly hinder life self-doubt. Almost every woman who has recently given birth doubts her ability to cope with new responsibilities. “How do you cut those tiny nails? Can I give my baby an enema? What if the baby is in pain? What kind of mother am I if instead of love I feel only anxiety for the child? Some are haunted child's frustration.“He is so red, wrinkled! Doesn't look at me at all, doesn't smile! And this is my child, the one who has been waiting for nine months!” At the same time, as luck would have it, lucky friends are remembered who, although they gave birth recently, look just wonderful, and their children are calm, cute, in beautiful clothes ... Stop! You are no exception at all. In fact, most new mothers, like you, have no experience of motherhood. Remember that mothers are not born! Hormones and the very fact of having a baby cannot turn you from a woman into good mom. Motherhood is a daily work and experience based on endless trial and error.

Also, do not compare yourself with others, with those who, from your point of view, everything is just fine! We see only a little, and think out the rest ourselves. Moreover, people tell and show exactly what they want others to see and hear, and how it really is... You and your life are unique and incomparable to anyone! It's just different for you, in your own way!

A very special conversation - oh relationship with her husband. Women are often dissatisfied with the fact that a young father is not “enough” happy about his new social role: does not lisp with a baby, does not carry a wife in her arms, does not rush to help, etc. This list can be continued.

Dads can also be understood: a little rival appeared in the house, completely capturing the attention of his wife and subjugating the usual rhythm of life; family budget melting before our eyes, growing anxiety about the size of wages; romantic nights gone delicious dinners, going to the movies...

What can you say? Trite, but the birth of a child - The best way test your love. Some families fail this test. Many men find it difficult to give up themselves and get involved in new life. Many women believe that asking a husband for help is a humiliation. Himself, they say, should guess if he loves!

People, of course, are all different, but you can give one general advice: talk to each other, tell each other about your feelings, experiences, problems! Ask each other for help! Many men, for example, are sure that a woman is “created by nature for motherhood”, her chores are “natural” and therefore she practically does not need help. changing sleepless night at the baby's crib, it is also useful to sometimes remember why you decided to be together and start a family. What were your feelings then? Patience and sacrifice are the components of "active love".

Here are some proven life tips:

Don't try to be superwoman. No one expects "everyday exploits" from you! It's hard to believe, but it's true. You have given birth to a child. It is you who first of all need the care of others.
Learn to accept the help of others! A retired neighbor can take a walk with a sleeping baby, and at this time you wash your hair and take a shower.
In order to slightly recede the feeling of constant lack of time, try to simplify life as much as possible. Washing machine, electric kettle, microwave oven - great helpers for young parents. Accustom your spouse for some time to dumplings, scrambled eggs and simple salads, which he, if necessary, can cook himself.
Keep records. It's very easy to get caught domestic problems and hassle. But the baby gives so much joy! Write down your thoughts and feelings associated with the birth of a child, the first experiences of motherhood. Young mothers can initially keep monthly records: how much the baby weighs, what he can do, etc. In the future, this diary may come in handy when contacting a neurologist, speech therapist, child psychologist.
Share your feelings with your husband. The young father is stressed too! He needs you as much as you need him. Seek support from each other. Pay attention to the man you love. A simple chocolate bar, discreetly placed in his bag in the morning, can cheer him up for the whole working day!
Constantly mentally support and comfort yourself. Remember that all difficulties will end. You will rest, lose weight, return to work, meet friends, drink good wine and there are cakes. But today's time is not "thrown time", but a part of your life.

Life, as you know, is a striped zebra. Against the backdrop of all the worries and stresses, minutes of idyllic tranquility and happiness are sure to stand out. Just like that, when you, forgetting about everything, gently press to your chest little man funny rompers...