If the son of 6 years is lazy. Why is the child lazy? My experience. What can be hidden behind the laziness of a child

What to do if you have lazy child? Our tips will help if your child is lazy!

In general, the first thing to do when faced with the fact of someone else's laziness is to relax and not put much pressure on the pedals. Otherwise, you will spoil the relationship, and the cart will remain where it was.

It is better to find a compromise between your adult "must" and his childish "I want": there has not yet been a child in the world who would be too lazy to do what he "wants" and "likes". Laziness stands up to protect its interests only if there is a danger of wasting precious time of life on an unloved occupation. "I don't like physics (astronomy, geography)!!!" - means that these items are too lazy to do. "I hate to dust" means it's better to let it dust itself when its time comes. Where there is no interest, laziness always reigns!

The classic question arises: "What to do?" Which only asks for a creative answer: "Turn on the adventurism engine of the Tom Sawyer model." And teach your "bunny-cat" to light the stars while painting the fence and cause "envy" from those around you with your luxurious hole in the place of a fallen milk tooth. Otherwise, your moralizing will seem boring even to you, and your child's life path may go in the opposite direction from the place where "wealth and health" triumph.

Does your child ignore washing dishes? And you offer a deal: wash the dishes together, but at a speed. The winner is the one who washed more, and for this he can, for example, spray the loser with water or make the poor fellow shout: "I am a Spanish husk, Nebuchadnezzar's louse caught in blood drinking" ... Anything, the main thing is to have fun. (Perhaps it is unnecessary to mention that you should (as a boxer) "lay in the ring" and not aim to win this match). And remember: unlike you, laziness is not imaginative. The substitution syndrome paralyzes her: laziness revels in the game, and the case becomes just a chip, without which the game is impossible.

Idleness does not endure ingenuity, although, on the other hand, it is itself inventive in terms of all sorts of cunning tricks. Therefore, any ancestor will have to constantly improve in this fight. Otherwise, you will have to step on the throat of the song of your own laziness and do everything yourself (including physics).

As is known, Golden Rule idler - "Do not do today what you can do tomorrow. And do not do tomorrow what you can not do at all." Why the morning stress with cleaning the bed, if in the evening you have to disassemble it? Also true. Therefore, take and photograph first the cleaned, and then the unmade bed (for artistry, you can put a couple of bitten sandwiches and an apple core on a blanket), frame these two photo masterpieces in beautiful frame and, with the caption "beauty will save the world", hang over the object of your daily suffering. Laziness, of course, is blind, but not so much as not to shudder at the obvious muck.

Does your child scatter their belongings everywhere? And it annoys you? Not a problem - throw away everything that is out of place (well, you can hide them for a long time if the "toad is choking"). Two or three months - and you can celebrate the victory! For this case, you can choose the tactics of L.N. Tolstoy, based on "non-resistance to evil by violence", for example: sprinkle sweets on each thing (or around it) that is not put in its place, decorate it with a bow, light candles around it, sprinkle confetti and serpentine, sparkles, whatever you want. And try to celebrate" New Year"in honor of each sock laid out on the piano. Leni is pleased, and you have fun. However, after a couple of such performances, things somehow fall into place by themselves.

In the struggle for order in the house, do not forget the main rule: "Clean not where they sweep, but where they do not litter!" If a child is taught from childhood to put things in the place where they took them from, then you will not have problems with order.

In the fight against other people's laziness, the main thing is to follow the rules of guerrilla warfare: secrecy, surprise, calmness and a sense of humor.

It's no secret that many children go to school without much enthusiasm and do not want to learn. Parents try to force the child in all possible, sometimes not the best, ways. Often this does not solve the problem, but exacerbates it even more. Here it is important to find individual approach and deal with the situation. And the advice of psychologists will help find the answer to the question of what to do if the child does not want to study.

Finding out the reasons why the child does not want to learn is half the battle. The main task of parents is to listen to their child and help him cope with problems. Main reasons that can influence the desire to receive and use knowledge:

low motivation;
lack of interest and ability;
relationship problems at school
complexes;
family conflicts;
lack of control;
excessive control;
hyperactivity;
laziness.

Not every student clearly understands why they should go to school and study. Getting knowledge for the sake of grades is not the best incentive for everyone. This is especially true for children of primary school age. In high school, this phenomenon is slowly disappearing, as a certain career guidance is already underway, and good grades are needed for admission to a university.

Lack of interest in certain subjects can also affect academic performance. After all, a school is a public institution. And not all children are able to master both mathematics and literature equally well. Some are more interested in the humanities, while the exact sciences are difficult for them. Therefore, it is not uncommon for a person who did not study well at school to graduate from the university with honors.

The reason for the reluctance to attend school may be antipathy towards the teacher or difficult relationships with peers. When a student experiences complexes and ridicule about his appearance, he also develops a strong reluctance to visit an institution and, therefore, this is reflected in academic performance.

Climate within the family greatly affects the performance of an adult, and what can we say about a child. little man he is very acutely experiencing family conflicts, he can form a number of complexes, experiences and stresses. All this can lead to apathy and indifference to learning. And also failure at school can be the result of a child's protest against parents and their actions.

Many children are alien to such concepts as self-organization and self-control. And if the parents stay out of the house until late, then the child is left to himself. He will do the things that he likes, and doing homework recedes into the background. Due to overwork parents are not able to pay attention to the existence of the problem in time.

The situation is completely opposite when there is excessive control by parents or other family members. The child has every minute scheduled. Coming from school, at the insistence of older family members, he immediately sits down for lessons. He does not have the right to make a mistake, he is given excessive demands. All these actions lead to fatigue, absent-mindedness and irritability. The student is constantly under stress. This situation leads to the fact that the child cannot fully and efficiently do homework and study.

The learning process requires perseverance and patience. If hyperactive child, he has a lot of extra energy that he has nowhere to put. He is not able to stay in one place for a long time. As a result - bad behavior, disrupted lessons and poor academic performance.

The reason for poor academic performance may be that the child is lazy to learn. What to do in this case, if these qualities initially prevail in character. For some it may be the result of a lack of motivation and understanding the need for the learning process.

6-7 year old student who recently attended kindergarten has yet to adjust to the school curriculum. For him, the memories of playing pastime in preschool. Therefore, it is difficult for him to perceive much new information in the format school education. In addition, training programs are becoming more difficult every year. It scares small child and causes nervous tension.

A child of primary school age cannot yet be fully responsible for his actions. At this age, children do not have social maturity. In most cases, they do not have a clear understanding of the need to study and do homework. In addition, the school curriculum implies the daily performance of a certain ritual. A student should get up early every day, sit at a desk for several hours in class, leave the classroom only at breaks and do homework at home.

The little man needs time to readjust.

In addition, the parents themselves form the child's attitude towards school. Also in before school age they can put excessive demands on the child regarding future academic performance. For example: "Here you go to the first class, you will be an excellent student." And sometimes, they can intimidate a son or daughter. For example: “Is this how you will study at school, since you are so inattentive?” Such attitudes create fear or disappointment in the child.

After the age of 12, the child ceases to feel like a little man, on which nothing depends. This is a period of personality formation, a change in priorities. A teenager tries to make decisions himself, wants to take responsibility. During this period, relationships with peers are paramount for him. Authority may appear.

The main reasons for poor performance:

chat with friends;
computer games;
bad habits.

A teenager wants to spend more time with friends, so he is not up to studying. The child becomes dependent on bad habits, dysfunctional friends. All of these affect school performance.

Development digital technologies and opportunities for varied pastime also does not contribute to the pursuit of knowledge.

All children are inquisitive from birth. The task of parents maintain and develop this interest even at preschool age. Reading books together, visiting museums, experimentariums, exhibitions and theaters forms the child's internal motivation to acquire new knowledge. And already at school age he will have a desire and aspiration to study.

It is also important for parents themselves to share their positive impressions from studying at school. You can, if you have survived, get your school notebooks and textbooks. Showcase your school pictures. But from negative memories should refrain.

In elementary grades, it is very important to do homework with the child in order to understand what to do if there is no desire to learn. At the same time, without getting annoyed and not nervous if he does not understand something. Do not immediately start doing homework after finishing school. It is necessary to give time to relax, get distracted and do what you love.

Important organize time properly for recreation and homework. Physical and emotional state son or daughter. Do not overload the student lower grades extra classes and activities. Visiting sections should be reduced to 2 times a week.

A small child in grade 2 does not want to study because he still does not quite understand why this is necessary. It is important for parents to convey this information to the baby. In your explanations, you should not portray the school as some fabulous place where everything is fine and good. School is an institution where all children go to communicate and gain knowledge, which can then be applied in life. Successful learning will help in the future to get a good, interesting work, achieve lofty goals. An analogy should be drawn with the work that adults go to every day. For a child, work is study, salary is grades.

It is believed that modern teenagers do not want to study because of laziness. In the understanding of many adults, the image of a lazy teenager has become more of a rule than an exception. But in fact, this is a misconception. It should be understood that for a teenager of 12-17 years old, a huge reluctance to learn is associated with a lack of motivation to do things that do not matter.

Exists 5 motivational principles for high school students:

Be significant.
Be heard.
Learn from your own mistakes.
Be motivated.
Do what brings satisfaction.

The first principle is very important. If a teenager does not understand what the meaning of the actions being performed is or how it is connected with him, he will not feel like doing it. People of this age want to show themselves and the world that they can make a difference. If their significance is downplayed or ignored, then this causes an internal protest.

There is one powerful statement that can be used to convince young man about the importance of learning. “You have to do what you have to do so that you can do what you want to do later.” This is a very useful statement as it is true in many areas. Helping a teenager see meaningless tasks as part of higher goals in life is a valuable message to convey.

It is important to understand what exactly the child wants. Perhaps my mother once dreamed of getting a gold medal at school and being a successful ballerina. But due to some circumstances this did not happen. Then she will try to realize these dreams in her daughter. IN adolescence children strive to be themselves, to fulfill their desires, and they want their parents to hear and understand them. Therefore, the phrase “Because I said so (la)” from parents sounds like a powerful demotivator.

Of course, you can voice your child's expectations and hopes for learning and achieving goals. But here it is more important to accept the personal point of view of the child and discuss options development of events.

When parents constantly try to protect their children from possible errors and failures, they undermine their ability to grow and develop. It should be understood that no matter how much you want to avoid failures, they help a person become better and wiser.

For a teenager, the approval and value of what he does is important. It can be verbal approval, encouragement with gifts. There is nothing wrong with rewarding your child for doing well in school. But here it is important that this process does not turn into bidding. And that the goals are adequate and achievable. And not the case when a good assessment must be achieved at any cost. In this case, teenagers begin to be hypocritical, “begging” for good grades from teachers.

In high school, children begin to understand more about what they would like to do in the future. Since there are many new subjects, a teenager can understand which ones are better for him and which are difficult. In this case, he may succeed in some, but fall behind in others.

Important to understand mental capacity and orientation of the high school student. Encourage him to develop exactly those areas that are of interest to him. Of course, it is worth emphasizing that for successful admission to a university, it is important to excel in all subjects. But one should not demand from the child to know all the disciplines perfectly. After all, the task of school education is not so much in obtaining impeccable knowledge and grades, but in the development and formation of thinking and the general culture of the individual.

It is far from uncommon that many children show an absolute reluctance to do anything. For example, parents ask to help around the house, put away their toys, or do with my own hands a birthday present for a grandmother, and the kid either refuses, or is accepted for everything with great reluctance, although the matter itself cannot be called difficult or impossible. He's probably just lazy. Why this happens and how to cope with childish laziness, "I am a Parent" will tell.

Causes of children's laziness

1. Parental Misbehavior: Overprotectiveness

There are many reasons for child laziness. However, the most important of them are based on the wrong behavior of parents. Think about how often you seized the initiative from your baby: “You’re still small, I’ll clean everything myself!”, “Don’t touch it, otherwise you’ll ruin it!”, “Don’t take a cup - you’ll break it!”. In such situations, parents simply deprive the child of initiative and do not allow him to do any business, assuming that they themselves will cope faster. In this case, the baby may completely lose the desire to strive for independence: why, if they still won’t allow it or call it “inept”?

2. Features of temperament

When arguing whether your child is lazy or not, do not forget to stop at. Maybe your baby is choleric or sanguine. Then it becomes clear why he is not given work that requires concentration and perseverance. Rather, it will be performed by a concentrated phlegmatic or melancholic. However, crumbs with the named types of temperament will hardly perform tasks where speed of reaction and active communication are necessary.

3. Boredom

The cause of laziness is also banal boredom. Children are always very mobile: they need to constantly run, invent something and throw out their energy somewhere. If parents or kindergarten teachers constantly force them to sit quietly and not interfere, then cheerful and inquisitive children turn into sad and lack of initiative.

Sometimes there are situations when a child cannot throw out his energy in kindergarten and, when he comes home, he wants to run and play enough, and his parents instead force him to do boring things - for example, put away toys. The same thing happens when evening walk with a child, mom and dad are replaced by watching TV: the baby is unable to throw out his energy - he is offended, angry and, of course, there can no longer be any talk of any pleasure from helping around the house.

4. Misunderstanding: why do it?

Sometimes children simply do not understand why it is necessary to perform this or that action. Why collect toys if tomorrow you have to get them again? Why make your bed in the morning if you have to sleep in it again in the evening? This happens when parents simply require the child to follow the order, but do not explain why this is important.

5. Disinterest

Often the child does not want to take on this or that matter, since it is simply not interesting to him. Parents need to give the kid motivation, to arouse in him a desire to take up any activity, to outline his goal. Then the children will strive to achieve the final result, and he, in turn, will bring them pleasure.

6. Fear of failure

Perhaps the child does not take on some business, as he simply experiences a fear of failure. For example, a poem, because the last time I read it unsuccessfully in class and was “rewarded” with ridicule from classmates. There is already a problem in self-doubt, probably even in low self-esteem.

How to deal with children's laziness?

If your child is lazy, you should think about how to fix the situation.

Do not forget that children absorb everything that their parents do and say, so first of all take a closer look at your own behavior. If you order pizza at home instead of cooking dinner, leave dirty dishes in the sink overnight, replace your evening walk with “sitting” at the computer or watching TV, and instead morning exercises bask in bed for an extra twenty minutes - the child just takes an example from you! you need to change own behavior so that the baby is equal to you.

Not all parents can boast that their son or daughter is not too lazy to perform personal care procedures, clean up the room, wash dishes and run to the store.

Children's laziness is a fairly common phenomenon that threatens with complications in future life. After all, what cannot be invested in a child before puberty - responsibility, punctuality, decision-making ability, the ability to properly manage one's personal time - will result in unfulfillment, low adaptability and uncompetitiveness in adult life.

Therefore, the problem is much more serious than it might seem at first glance, and you should not dismiss it, but look for the reasons for the behavior of a lazy child and try to gently correct them.

Why is the child lazy

Any character trait has some basis. Psychologists advise to carefully consider your baby, analyze his behavior and see real reasons making him lazy.

Perhaps the "sluggishness" of the baby is explained by his natural inhibition, which underlies individual features personality.

The phlegmatic temperament of the child does not allow him to do everything quickly, and this seems unwilling to parents. It is impossible to push, and even more so to scold, such children - you can only stimulate them with the fastest onset of the result.

Slowness is not always bad, such children are distinguished by composure, perseverance, thoroughness and painstaking work in the classroom. In this case, such a "lazy" child is better than an active friend-classmate who cannot concentrate on any of his many tasks.

Motivation is the fuel for activity even in adults, and even more so in children.

“Properly stimulating” does not include material interest, otherwise your relationship with the child risks sliding into the vulgar sphere of the market for the rest of your life. That's why they and parents should try to turn the ordinary household routine into an interest for the baby, and not a tedious duty.

The workload of the child with compulsory classes should be critically reviewed.

IN Lately it is fashionable to raise a successful child prodigy at all costs, without taking into account either the child's abilities or his interests. The continuous series of "school - section - foreign language– dance circle” lead sooner or later to inevitable physical and psychological exhaustion. Banal fatigue and is manifested by unwillingness to do anything.

Increase self-confidence.

If by nature the child is not self-confident, shy and restrained, psychologically dependent on the elders, then he may simply be afraid that he will not be able to cope with the affairs, and not at all lazy, as the mother thinks. So that such children are not lazy, only a gradual increase in self-confidence and constant attention to his success, albeit, for starters, in small undertakings, will help.

The most common mistake parents make is that by their behavior they themselves have atrophied his ability to be independent.

Everyone is familiar with the picture when the baby, according to the mother, is a lazy person, cannot quickly collect toys or finish eating porridge, and begins to do it for him - she removes them herself and feeds them from a spoon.

Of course, this becomes an attitude for him - “I don’t have to do it myself - my mother will do it.” It is difficult to change such an attitude, but it is necessary, otherwise it is fraught with the formation of a habit in the future that someone should do his job for him.

Ways to solve the problem

As you can see, the behavior of parents is the main factor in the origin of laziness, in the creation of “hothouse” conditions under which there is no need to show initiative and responsibility.

A lazy child is not a sentence forever, but an incentive to solve pedagogical and psychological issues: "what to do to raise a successful and hardworking person."

Daily and persistently you need to accustom children to work:

Personal example of labor participation, involving them in cooperation.
The presence of a creative approach in any uninteresting activity. Over time, this need will disappear, but the baby's habit will remain.
Stimulation of independence - let him do something clumsily, but on his own. Do not forget to praise even for an accidentally broken plate - it is important that he himself wanted to wash it.
Avoid unconstructive criticism, do not call the child offensive epithets if he does not cope. It is better to discuss together the reasons for his failures and support him by instilling confidence
IN household make a specific list of assignments that require his participation. Let small, but mandatory. Their implementation will not require much time, but will allow you to develop organization, independence and responsibility.

It would be interesting to conduct a survey among parents on the topic: "When did they first notice manifestations of laziness in their child?". Someone dates the first sprouts of laziness by the age of entering school. Someone - begins to notice such manifestations in a child in the kindergarten period of development. And, for sure, there will be parents who will find manifestations of laziness even in a baby of 2-3 years old. But, most likely, the birthday of laziness specific child will coincide with the day when he has duties.

That laziness is harmful property Everyone knows human nature. ABOUT harmful effects laziness in a person’s life also does not need to be told to anyone - all adults know this very well own experience. But where laziness comes from, and what to do to prevent its occurrence, few parents think. More often, the problem of laziness arises before parents in full height V teenage years development of the child, when it is no longer easy to change anything, and it is not the parents who should change this “something”, but the growing person himself. Therefore, as in solving many other pedagogical problems: better prevention than treatment.

Let's look at the phenomenon itself first. So what is laziness? Wikipedia writes the following about laziness: “Laziness is the absence or lack of diligence, the preference for free time labor activity". Other definitions of laziness: “laziness is the need to save energy”, “laziness is a persistent unwillingness to make an effort of will”, “this is the desire to refuse to overcome difficulties”. Traditionally in society, laziness is seen as a vice.

All these ideas about laziness are well understood by us, so adults can consider a child lazy when he is fighting for his own interests. free time, shirks from work, performs assigned tasks half-heartedly, does not want to strain and tries to avoid difficulties.

Everything seems to be clear. There is a vice - you need to find ways to eradicate it (suppress, cure, replace, re-educate, etc.). But if you dig deeper and look at internal causes, which are hidden behind manifestations of laziness, then the question will be much more complicated.

Try looking at laziness as a symptom. A symptom behind which lies a complex tangled causal chain of situations, states and consequences.

So what lies behind laziness?

First, this is lack of motivation. The famous cosmonaut German Titov said: “Attitude to work as a duty, and not as a creative process leads to the fact that the work becomes a burden ... ". Indeed, coercion can spoil the attitude to any business, even among adults. What can we say about a child who is just developing volitional processes? It is very sad when a child has little experience of interacting with people who can captivate, interest, inspire him to creative attitude to the point. Usually, such pedagogical talents are possessed by people who themselves know how to ignite a creative fire in themselves. With a lack of such experience, a decrease in motivational energy occurs: it becomes difficult for a person to set goals and strive for them, and sometimes it is even difficult to be happy with the result, because a lot of effort goes into the process. A child who is rarely inspired often talks about being bored, that he does not know what to do, and waiting for adults to come up with some kind of business or entertainment for him.

Motivation may not only be insufficient, it may be negative. Those. the child may consciously not want to do something. Often this happens in families where adults do their work because they "need" and not because they "want" it. Watching this picture from childhood, a child can generally refuse such a lifestyle as harmful to himself: “I don’t want to live like that and I won’t!”. And what “I want and I will” he has not yet come up with, so he hangs in a state of inactivity, and sometimes active idleness. It is useful for the parents of such a child to ask themselves questions more often: “What do I really want?”, “Do I want to do what I do?”, “Do I often experience a state of joy, happiness?”. And if the answers do not satisfy, then it's time to change something.

The reluctance to do something may be unconscious. Those. the child says: “I want to be able to do this”, “I will do it”, but in practice does not complete the task, forgets about promises, wakes up, is late, and then cannot explain,
why this happened. In such situations, laziness hides resistance. Resistance is a form of psychological defense that implicitly takes a person out of an undesirable situation for him and allows him to be himself. Resistance helps the child not to enter into open conflict with adults, because everyone can see that he is good, he didn’t want to, it just happened by chance. Resistance can even manifest itself in the form of illness and injury: "I was just about to do it, but ... I got sick." One of the clearest examples of resistance is frequent illnesses child upon admission to kindergarten. Those. the child is not sick because he has weak immunity or unusual nervous tension, but because he really does not want to go there. Only a sincere dialogue with the child about his real motives can remove resistance. To understand the baby, to allow him to experience and express negative emotions, to talk about his experiences, to find a common solution together - this is the way that not only extinguishes resistance, but also develops the ability for introspection and empathy.

Behind laziness can hide motivation to avoid failure. If the kid is not self-confident, shy, psychologically very dependent on his parents, then he can be really afraid of some deeds, actions and responsibilities. Parents who abuse expressions like “you can’t do such a simple thing - it’s elementary!” risk creating conditions for the development low self-esteem The child has. Even we adults do not want to take on cases in which we feel like “weaklings”, “triples” and “incapable”. And the child’s avoidance of such matters entails consequences in the form of gluing the label of a lazy person to him by his parents: “he doesn’t want to do anything - that’s lazy!” The great Russian psychologist P.Ya.Galperin said that the beginning of the development of any skill (ability) is the formation of motivation, and this is the problem of the teacher, not the child. It is the parents who should interest the child in some kind of activity, and help him go through several crises of falling motivation, so that he has formed his own inner desire to do this. If this succeeds, then the child will not only not have to be forced - you will not be able to pull him away from this lesson.

Such a problem as disorganization and inability to plan also often called laziness, but these are different things! The ability to organize one's space and time, the ability to plan things are not innate and hereditary qualities. A child can demonstrate these qualities on his own only if he imitates a beloved adult or someone taught him this. Disorganization can indeed be very similar to laziness. The fact is that in the life of every person there is always a competition of affairs and occupations. Adults deal with this problem by building a hierarchy and planning their own affairs. If we don’t have this hierarchy in mind and make plans, then we will be sidetracked by easier activities that bring pleasure right now. Everyone knows when, instead of writing a paper, to do general cleaning etc. we drink coffee with chocolate, sit at the computer, knit, lie in the bath, cook food, and then there is no time left for anything.

In some cases, laziness can do something really useful - protective function for our body. Those. laziness becomes a defense against overload, fatigue and poor health. This happens more often with adults, but there are children who are characterized by hyper-responsibility, control, ambition and perfectionism. Such a child can also overload and “drive” himself without noticing the loss of strength. An unexpected "attack of laziness" can cover such a child at the most inopportune moment. If the overload common occurrence in a child’s life, then his “laziness” may even look like apathy or depression.

Laziness can be the result game and motor deficit in a child's life. This happens when a child is made into an adult too early, preventing the baby from satisfying its normal age needs for play and movement.

Laziness is contagious. Therefore, the child can simply absorb such lifestyle in his own family. If so, then it is not his laziness.

And finally, laziness is normal condition all living organisms which can only be overcome for very good reasons. It is about the creation of such reasons (motives) that parents should take care of.

The word "motivation" comes from the Latin root "to move" and means inner motivation, interest, striving for something. There is also a reverse process - demotivation, which means a decrease in motivation up to its disappearance.

So, in order to defeat laziness, it is necessary, firstly, not to interfere with the development of motives for action in a child, and secondly, to help him develop such motives. And there are especially harmful parenting mistakes on this way:

Such parent style how conniving hyper-custody creates almost “intrauterine conditions” for the child: eat, drink, grow, and we will do the rest for you. Several years of such education will require several years of re-education.
Controlling overprotection also leads to the development of laziness, only in a different way. When parents do not listen to the wishes of the child, but are guided by the principle “that's all!”, the child learns to do something under duress, and not on his own initiative.
During early childhood When all children's eyes are on fire, their personal initiative is often hindered by the laziness of their parents. If a child wants to help his mother wash the dishes, knock with a hammer with his father, dig in the garden with his grandmother - you should not drive him away with the words “if you want to help me, don’t interfere!” or "still small!". Let the sprouts of activity, initiative and diligence ripen in the baby.
The joyless and exhausting work of parents is also not best example to emulate. Moreover, it is rather an anti-example.
Sometimes parents simply do not know how the volitional qualities of a child develop. Therefore, the search for knowledge to increase your parental competence in this area is good experience for the development of their own volitional qualities.
A common mistake parents make is not understanding age features and capabilities of the child. Overestimation and underestimation of children's capabilities by parents disorients the child - he does not understand his tasks and ways to solve them.
In the process of teaching a child, parents always have reasons for criticism and dissatisfaction. Sometimes it is useful to imagine someone else's baby in the place of your child so that your criticism becomes more tactful and delicate.
An excess of “sticks” and “carrots” in the pedagogical arsenal of parents also leads to the extinction of motivation. Joint business, sense of humor, interest and creativity- perfectly replace handouts and punishments.
It is important for parents to learn how to creatively approach the task of organizing family leisure, because “lazy” ways of filling free time are assimilated by the child as a life norm.
Sticking labels like “you are as lazy as your father” does not at all stimulate the child to immediately start fighting laziness, but, on the contrary, create an internal confidence that it is useless to fight, because “the same”.

In laziness there is positive properties. For example:

- Laziness is the engine of progress: "If you are lazy and stubborn, you will certainly achieve something" - Feido J.

- Honesty: "A lazy person is a person who does not pretend to work" - Alphonse.

- Ingenuity: "Give a particularly difficult task to a lazy person - he will find the easiest solution" - Chlady's law.

- A means of psychological protection: “The laziness of a simple Russian person is not a sin, but completely necessary remedy neutralize the ebullient activity of the fools who lead them" - S. Yankovsky.

- Attention to own desires: "It is better to do nothing than to do nothing" - Tacitus.

- The ability to dream: “It is stupid to think negatively about laziness, and laugh arrogantly at it: laziness knows how to dream so actively that dreams begin to come true” - I. Huberman.

- The ability to remain a child: "Idleness is the happiness of children and the misfortune of the elderly" - V. Hugo.

Use the positive properties of laziness in order to squeeze the maximum benefit out of even this seemingly harmful quality. And, in your address to the child, replace the word “lazy” with everything that has a more positive meaning: inventive, dreamy, honest, cunning, etc.

And the approach to the problem of laziness, as always in parenting practice, start with yourself. Do not condemn the child for laziness, let him understand that you and all other people know this quality firsthand. There is no need to fight laziness - you need to grow out of it. There are some helpful parenting tips for this:

- do not finish things for the child,

- do not extinguish his initiative,

- do not stick to him the label of a lazy person,

- include competitive moments,

- allocate special time for laziness,

- do not abuse such lazy types of recreation as a computer and TV.

- assign a number of feasible tasks to the child,

- do not use labor as a punishment,

- help the child to look for and find interesting activities for him.

And if your child is head over heels in solving some important task, abandoning other things for a while - do not worry, because you have already defeated laziness.

“Laziness very often turns into spiritual impassability: not finding or losing a direction in life, when a person does not know for what and what to strive for, where to live and why do what seems to be done” .

V. Levy "The Cure for Laziness"

Literature:

Amonashviili "Humanistic-personal pedagogy"
Gippenreiter “Communicate with the child. How?"
Levi V. "The Cure for Laziness"
Soloveichik S. "Teaching with passion"