How to know that you are truly loved. There is sympathy, affection, passion, perhaps falling in love, but this is not enough to marry a man. Where is the guarantee that when you are already married, he will not meet the one that he loves with all his heart? How

Throughout the ages, mankind has tirelessly spoken of love - and modern world not an exception. She lives forever in popular hits and " soap operas", books and life stories- real and imaginary. But how to understand that you love for real, without pretense and falsehood, and how to distinguish a real feeling from what only “seems”?

12 keys to true love: how to tell the real from the fake

“You are not just a hobby, you are the most important thing” - is sung in one of the popular songs of our time. Indeed, love and passion are, as they say, two big differences but the difference is not easy to see with the naked eye. However, if you take into account each of the following components, you can still consider the most important. So, try the following test:

What is attraction? If you love a person, then the least interested in his physical data, for example, Beautiful face or flawless figure. Perhaps this is important, but something else is much more important: the whole personality of the chosen one, and not some of his specific features.
Number of Attractive Qualities. Love accepts the vast majority, if not all, of the other person's qualities. Take a short test in the form of a question: how many features do you notice in the object of your attention, and which part of them is attractive to you? With a normal hobby, the number of such characteristics is insignificant.
The beginning of the story. A real feeling, the very one that “for life” is alien to swiftness in principle: it develops slowly, gradually, aiming at knowing the object of its sympathy, before really “sticking” to it forever. Therefore, the eternal and not losing relevance wording “love at first sight” is not entirely true - thanks to the first impression, you can only get carried away.
Persistence of Interest. Warmth and tenderness are the main components of genuine love. Constancy is something without which it is impossible, because everything that has a price takes root tightly and sprouts slowly. Only what is unimportant remains on the surface.
Influence of feeling. Genuine affection reveals and reveals only the best features in a person, which is why the lover always strives to become better. This one will always say: "I love him / her not because she is impeccably beautiful, but because he / she helps me bring out the best that is in me."
At the same time, it is easy to recognize a trite person who has become carried away by such signs as a decrease in responsibility, constant immersion in dreams. Nothing matters to him except love.
Attitude towards other people. If you love, the world of your loved one seems to automatically become yours. All. And the world is the whole Universe: relatives, relatives and friends. That is, everything that is important and significant for the chosen one becomes the same for you.
If the Cosmos is liquefied by the framework of a single person, without anyone else, if you think that love justifies everything, therefore everything is allowed, even to the detriment of others, then there is nothing real in this “amazing” feeling - only mean egoism.
Opinion of others. The real is always in sight, because he has nothing to hide. Therefore, such fluids are difficult not to notice the immediate environment. Since a person in love is often “blind”, it is the attitude of society that very often becomes a kind of indicator of the honesty of feelings, this is such a test of authenticity, so you should not quarrel with your parents if they do not approve of your choice.
Friends and acquaintances, of course, may be wrong, but perhaps their point of view is an occasion to think and prevent the most big mistake In my life.
The impact of breakups. The breakup test is a win-win, albeit a bit cruel, test of feeling. The absence of a loved one will exacerbate true love and “grow together” with the second half even more, and kill a fake one.
If you love, then at a distance of separation you will not be able to fill the void with anyone else, constantly sad and worried: “What if he (she) meets someone else?” Everything is so simple and banal, like two and two.
Spat test. There are disagreements in any couple, but the point is that in a true union all this is “deeply experienced”, therefore people tend to quarrel less often and insignificantly, and when there is “ sharp corners» Smooth out the conflict by honestly and openly discussing the issues. IN frequent quarrels, headed by their own egoism (“You, it’s all your fault (a)!”), In skirmishes that arise because there is nothing more to talk about - everything is false through and through.
Relationship perspective. If you, thinking about a couple, perceive, first of all, two different personalities, it is unlikely that such a feeling can be called the word “love”. But when it really is important person you do not perceive separately from yourself, using only the wording: “we”, “us”, “our”. A couple, held together by a thread of real feeling, is always pleased to do something in tandem.
Selfishness and unselfishness. A guy can meet to console his own vanity: “She is so spectacular girl- I will become a king next to her! ”, And the girl is solely in order to raise her price in the eyes of society. But a person is loved not for something that he gives, but for the fact that he simply is.
basis of feelings. Selflessness and devotion are the foundations of love. The test is simple: at any cost, you strive to give joy and give something, and not receive. If you care first of all about yourself and your interests, about what you can take out of a relationship, the essence is obvious.

How to comprehend and get an answer?

So, the test is passed, there are honest answers to all questions. It remains only to correctly comprehend them. Of course, the answers to the above keys cannot be purely "black" and "white" - most often, it is a mixture of "love" and "hobby".

Therefore, for convenience, evaluate each test question on a 10-point scale: the more real - the more points. If the end result is from 80 points and above, we can confidently assert a sincere and reliable feeling.

10 signs you love

Another test for love can be passed on such grounds. If:

loved one is the best part of the day, beautifies it simply by its presence;
he is the first one you think about when you open your eyes in the morning, and the last one you dream about before going to bed, and also when you want to share with the “half” not only sorrow, but also everything beautiful that happens in life;
self-interest is always in the background;
anything can be done to the detriment of selfishness for the happiness of another, because love has no boundaries;
there is no fear and embarrassment to demonstrate their feelings in front of the whole world;
there is a recognition of the shortcomings of a loved one and an acceptance of the fact that the object of your love is imperfection. Only by sincerely falling in love, one can learn to accept the “blots” of another;
there is a desire to plan a joint future for the long term;
there is a desire to become better than now;
there are no conditions for love, because the real feeling is absolute, this is not a mathematical problem that depends on specific circumstances.

Finally, if we are talking about love, then the second half is, first of all, the best friend, and only then the object of attraction between the sexes. The last test: do you feel ready to move mountains, but only if he (a) is nearby? Hold on and don't let go!

Hello dear readers. In this article we will try to deal with the question “do you love a person or not?”. Sometimes there are situations when it is very difficult to determine your feelings, and you may face a serious choice, for example, an offer to marry. Then this question begins to interest especially strongly, because no one wants to make a mistake in their choice.

Love, addiction or attraction

If you ask from different people define the word "love" various options. This is the attitude towards their children, towards animals, in food, country or partner. However, the most commonly encountered definition will relate to the emotional manifestation of feelings for a person of the opposite sex. Many people are faced with a situation where they cannot decide, think about the phrase “I don’t understand whether I love or not.” After all, we can confuse love with a habit, and sometimes with addiction. This is starting to worry. But you can figure it out, knowing what are the characteristic manifestations of sympathy, love and falling in love exist. Let's see how different qualities differ, which are often mistaken for love.

Sympathy can for a long time persist, however, mainly occurs between friends. In such a situation, it is necessary to understand what the feelings for a particular chosen one were based on. Is there a willingness to provide support, assistance in difficult moments in the life of another person, are there common interests? If so, then, most likely, after some time, the feeling of sympathy will develop into true love.
Sexual attraction. If, while communicating with your partner, you experience arousal, this is not an indicator that you love him, most likely you need him to satisfy physiological needs.
set of interests and sexual attraction may indicate the presence romantic love. This period is the most wonderful in a relationship, but it is observed mainly in young couples.
Passion. When do they take place serious relationship, it is not one of the leading features. It is absurd to assume that you love someone if passionate feelings flare up between you, because you can’t go far on passion alone.
Lovers, friends and associates at the same time. It is believed that real love will not arise if there is no friendship between partners.
Addiction. It is important to avoid emotional sadism. If a person believes that someone must be with him, then this is a manifestation of false love, and not real feelings.
Jealousy. The jealous person is selfish by nature, wanting to rule over his partner.

Signs of real feelings

Constancy. If you truly love a person, you do not lose interest in him over time. If there is an attempt by another person to interfere in the relationship, then the lover will defend his happiness, will not back down from him.
Selflessness and sacrifice. A person who is in love, first of all, thinks about himself and about the benefits that he can get when communicating with a partner. If the feelings are real, then all thoughts are primarily directed to the object of love, and desires are reduced to making the beloved happy. In this case, the person does not require anything in return. If there are healthy relationships in which both partners love, then there is a mutual return, both do everything to make life more joyful and comfortable.
Powerful emotions. If a person truly loves, this does not prevent him from communicating with friends. If the individual sees nothing but the object of his love, all thoughts are only about him, then definitely we are talking about, and not about real feelings, and this condition must be treated. A person who loves will not stop engaging in self-development, will not live on the ideas, interests and thoughts of another. At the same time, the person who is the object of love will stand out from the background of other people.
Peace of mind and trust. If you love a person, then you begin to trust him.
Unconditional acceptance. If you truly love, you will not try to change your partner.
If there are intimate relationship, then over time, the need for intimacy with a partner only increases if this is true love.

Love is characterized by such manifestations:

looking forward to meeting your loved one;
happy when this person is near;
waking up in the morning, the first person you think about is your beloved, falling asleep, you also remember him;
when communicating with a partner, there is a desire to talk about both good and bad;
take into account both your interests and the needs of your partner;
you want the whole world to know about your feelings;
you accept your partner as he is, you see his shortcomings, but you accept them;
you plan a joint future, dream of a family;
striving to change, to become better;
loved one is best friend with whom you can talk about a lot, get advice and support;
being next to the chosen one, you feel peace, tranquility;
thinking about the second half, the heart begins to beat faster, a smile appears on the face;
expecting a meeting with a partner, you miss him.

Ways

Except characteristic features love, you can try various methods defining your feelings.

Advantages and disadvantages. Take a sheet of paper and divide it into two columns. In the first write down all the positive features of your partner, everything that you like, in the second - all the shortcomings. Now analyze what you have written. If there are more flaws, then your love is in doubt.
Meditation. Borrow comfortable posture close your eyes, be alone with your thoughts. So you can sit for half an hour or more. It is important that there are no factors that can distract, lead to other thoughts. Focus on your breathing, calm down, imagine the person you doubt your feelings for. Mentally seeing it, try to understand that in this moment you feel whether there is a desire to approach him, hug, kiss, or some negative feelings appear. After evaluating these sensations, you can understand how dear he is to you and whether there is love here.
"Love is no more." The technique is quite radical, but very effective. You need to imagine that such a moment has come and your chosen one is no longer with you or your acquaintance never took place. What feelings do such thoughts evoke? Are you comfortable with this or are you experiencing severe pain? The fact is that many people sometimes do not understand how they feel about specific person until they lose it. But then it's too late to change anything. That is why it is so important to resort to such a method in order to reveal what feelings are actually hidden in your heart, how dear this person is. If there is strong pain at the mere thought that he is not around, then everything must be done in order to maintain this relationship. There is definitely love in your heart. But you should not forget that love addiction can also give a similar result, because a person who is obsessed with another cannot imagine his life without him, and also experiences pain.

It is very important to be able to distinguish real feelings from fake ones in order to easily answer the question, “Do you love a person?”.

You need to decide what exactly attracts you in a partner. Maybe you are only interested in physical data, an impeccable figure, a beautiful face, and then there is no place for love. Or are you interested in the whole personality, and not in individual traits?
The number of qualities that attract in a partner. You need to figure out what advantages your partner has, what features you pay attention to. The more of these qualities, the stronger feelings. If a person is simply infatuated with a person of the opposite sex, he may like, for example, a partner's sense of humor and nothing else.
Beginning of history. If your relationship started rapidly, then it is unlikely that this is the case. true love. Real feelings develop gradually with the knowledge of the object of sympathy and only over time become overgrown with roots, tied to a person.
persistence of interest. If love is experienced for an individual, over time he does not begin to annoy, there is no desire to break off relations. Real feelings are able to withstand any obstacles and obstacles.
The influence of feelings. When you love a person, you strive to be even better, engage in self-development. If you just “drown” in it, then you are dependent, but not in love.
When you love, parting with your loved one, you experience a feeling of loneliness, you feel that someone is missing, you look forward to meeting.

Now you know how to understand what you love. Be aware that some people often confuse true feeling with love or love addiction. Be extremely careful, I deal with my inner world. Take your time if there is any doubt about this, in time you yourself will realize whether there is love or not.

Such a complex and multifaceted feeling as love, being formed, goes through several stages. It begins with sympathy that grows out of the external attractiveness of the “object”, its behavior, communication with you. You are drawn to a person, although you still do not know the features of his character, personal qualities. Sympathy precedes falling in love - more complex, bright emotional experience when you learn both good and bad sides person. Depending on this, falling in love either develops into love, or leads to separation.

What to pay attention to?

If in the first months of communication you are wondering if a man loves you, then most likely you are just in love or have sympathy for him. Love grows out of falling in love and is a calmer, deeper and more lasting feeling. The ability to love depends on the level of personal maturity of a person.

How to understand that a man loves you? His feeling is always reflected in his behavior. Gaining life experience, we begin to guess their thoughts and feelings by the behavior of people. To answer this question for ourselves, you need to observe his actions and behavior, and least of all take into account his words. He can assure that he loves you, but in fact he does not have this feeling for you at all.

He admires you, especially when you do not see this, and at the same time glows with happiness.
If you need help, he will readily offer it to you, and will not wait until you ask him for it. Your problems at the same time can be completely different - emotional, physical, material - a loving man will support you in any case.
He wants to constantly communicate with you, talk about the events that happened in his life when you were not around.
He is sensitive to your mood and experiences a feeling of euphoria if he sees that you are happy. He will break into a cake just to make you happy.
A man is proud of you, he is pleased to be with you in public. He does not hide, but emphasizes your relationship and does not seek to meet you in hidden places.
He is delicate and very sensitive to your emotions and feelings, so he will never insist on sex until you yourself want it. He will prefer that your relationship develop naturally.
He tells you about his past, both good and bad.
loving man always remembers what you once said to him, because in any case he listens to you very carefully
He cares about your opinion about his behavior.
He always takes care of your needs and finds even small reasons to please you.
In his plans for life, he considers you a part of them.
He seeks to protect you: instinctively takes your hand or puts a hand on your shoulder when you are in a large crowd of people.
He values your opinion and does not make important decisions without first consulting with you.
He can't be angry with you for long. And he is always ready to apologize if you let him know that he is wrong.
He will never make comments to you, criticize in front of others.
He is not trying to change you. He likes even your flaws.
If problems and difficulties begin, he will not be afraid of them, will not disappear, but will consider them as another opportunity to strengthen your relationship.

What is the manifestation of love? In responsibility, care, respect - this is characteristic only of mature individuals. If a man loves you, you will feel his tenderness, care, warmth, and you will not have a question - how to understand that he loves you.

Falling in love, the bright beginning of a relationship, it's time for courtship - the hormones in the body play like that, and the whole world seems kind and joyful. But time passes, and instead of the previous delight, fatigue from the relationship appears. Only the shortcomings of the chosen one catch your eye, and you have to ask not from the heart, but from the mind: “How to understand if you love your husband?”

How to know if a wife loves her husband

To understand your attitude towards your husband, you need to understand what you are ready for for him. What troubles and misfortunes will you go through together, shoulder to shoulder? The following are a series of questions that need to be answered "yes" or "no":

Can you trust this person with your life?
Will you let me make important decisions for you?
Will you be able to donate a kidney or part of the liver in case of his illness so that he stays alive?
Would you give your life for the one you love?
Are you ready to be with him if he finds himself in wheelchair, care for him and support him in difficult times?
Are you ready to see this person every day of your life?
After spending time apart (for example, a month), will you miss, yearn for your husband and wait for his return?

If you answered yes to all these questions or most of them, then this is really love, and you should think about connecting your whole life with this person.

Rethinking Relationships

Most often, a woman asks the question: “How to understand if I love him?” at the moment when the feelings of partners are dulled. A person gets used to what surrounds him, and over time begins to see only flaws in a partner. In such a situation, you will not immediately remember why you so wanted your husband to always love. Doubts about feelings can appear in two cases:

Selfishness. So, a husband can be a wonderful person and a family man, but only instead of love in the soul of his wife - emptiness. Then it is worth considering how much effort is invested in maintaining relationships. Indeed, sometimes a woman only expects something from her husband, forgetting that giving attention to a partner is even more pleasant than receiving it.
Grievances. It happens that the husband accumulates a large number of reasons to apologize, and then there are doubts about the feelings experienced. It's not easy to love when you're waiting for an apology. In this case, you need to decide for yourself whether the husband deserves your love. And also remember why you fell in love with him in the first place. If he was able to win your feelings, then are his small mistakes and blunders so important?

How to check if you love your husband

These simple steps will allow you to understand how strong feelings for a partner:

Understand emotions. Is the situation really that serious, or is it just a momentary moral devastation? Everyone has hard days when it's so bad that you don't want to see anyone around. And you need to understand the difference between a momentary annoyance with your husband and serious problems in a relationship.
Decide what love means to you. Perhaps before you thought it was a strong heartbeat and sweaty palms. It happens that by going to new stage relationships, people mistakenly think it's cool old feelings. But for many couples love is finding peace and tranquility next to a partner.
Remember why you fell in love with your husband. There were reasons for marriage, and now you just need to remember the first dates and experienced emotions, conversations and plans for the future. So you can understand what is now missing in your relationship and fix it.
Imagine that your husband has disappeared from your life. What would she be then? Yes, relatives and friends remained, more time for hobbies and friends appeared, but are you ready to live with emptiness where he was always there before?

What should a married woman remember?

If long relationship in marriage began to turn into a routine, then you should think about whether it was your fault. A good relationship require effort on the part of both partners, but it happens that a woman lets the problems that arise in marriage take their course, and then asks herself the question: “How do you understand if you love your husband?”

Listen to your partner. Men and women show their emotions differently, so your husband may not understand that you expect him to do something. Or is he just not voicing his opinion about family problems. You need to pay attention to your partner and talk directly about the relationship, improving them together.

He is not you. So, your husband's point of view may differ from yours. Try to look at the problem through the eyes of your husband. Perhaps he does not realize that you are wondering: “How to understand if you love your husband?” and doubt your own feelings.

Don't live in illusion. Each family has its own ideal marriage, so you don’t need to look at your friends and adjust to their relationship. Start appreciating what the two of you are creating for your future.

Family is the whole world. By forming a family, you and your husband create your own space where you will be safe. Whatever difficulties may befall a person, but the mere knowledge that there is a place where he will be supported already gives strength. Therefore, it is worth fighting for your family and finding ways to solve the problem without destroying the relationships that have already been created.

It's not always easy to know if you really love a person. But if you think you can't live without it, if it's more precious than yours own interests then these are real feelings.

Love as an internal state, an ethical category, cannot be unambiguously defined. Each person feels love in his colors and emotions, each person understands love in his own way.

For some, love is a feeling of inspiration, joy, for others, love is associated with suffering and experiences. In many ways, society owes the tragedy of the perception of love classical literature, the main plot of which is unrequited, tragic love.

As the highest manifestation of human sensuality, love cannot be frequent and, one can hardly believe the frequently used phrase "I have fallen in love many times." Everyone has their own criteria for love, for someone it is care and constant attention, for someone expensive gifts and fulfillment of desires, for someone the ability to understand and forgive.

The most precious thing a person has is life, and we can say that top score falling in love is the willingness to sacrifice it for the sake of a loved one. Not only for the sake of a person, but also for the love of the Motherland, love for science, love for sports, love for extreme sports and more.

How to know if a guy loves you?

For many girls, the question is quite natural, how to check if a guy loves me. In many ways, this can be understood in detail, love is a sparkle in the eyes, excitement from meetings, a guy’s desire to be around, the ability to understand, empathize. That is, falling in love is betrayed by feelings that manifest themselves in everyday life. Constant attention to the girl, care, the desire to surround her with calmness, to bring beautiful notes into her life, is undoubtedly one of the indicators of a guy's love. Love is associated with romanticism and, invitations to walks in picturesque places, the desire to look at the starry sky together or just sit side by side, holding hands, lit candles and champagne indicate that the guy is in love.

It is difficult to argue that love is closely related to jealousy, and although jealousy can be a source of feelings, conflicts, its presence will serve as proof of a person’s love. Can be in game form artificially create a situation for jealousy and observe the state, experiences and actions of the guy.

Love is not easy beautiful words, these are also actions often associated with concessions to the object of love and even self-denial. And if a situation arises related to the choice, you can see whether the guy will insist on his desire or take the position of the girl, give in to her. Mutual understanding and mutual concessions are important and are most often present in the state of being in love. Probably, you can find a lot of advice on the issue, how to check if a guy loves you, but the main source of confidence in the presence of love will still be personal sensations and emotional background.

A man in love is constantly involved in beloved life, in her events and details, he will most likely be interested in the circle of her relatives and friends, and in part the feeling of falling in love will transfer to them.

You will be interested -

There are places in life extreme situations associated with risk and the presence real danger health and life. And if a girl has such a situation, the guy who loves her will never get lost, will not back down. He will do everything possible to eliminate this danger, to solve this problem. Elementary, if hooligans stick to them, he will never run away, he will be ready to protect the girl to the last. In any other critical situation, be it related to health, money, loving person will do everything in his power for the sake of his beloved.

If a guy loves, he wants to bring joy to the girl, including gifts and surprises. Of course, the value of gifts will be determined wealth a guy and you can’t demand the impossible, but the very fact that a guy strives to make original and romantic gifts and surprises can indicate the presence of love. Love and be loved!