What is important in a man and in a relationship. What is the most important thing in a relationship: the nuances that everyone needs to know about
If someone tells you that sex is the most important thing in a relationship between a man and a woman, throw a slipper at him! Yes, that physical closeness is important. But this is not the most important thing, there is also love and mutual respect, which are much more priority things. And what is even more important than the most passionate nights "under the stars"?
What is important in a relationship?
Look at couples who have lived over 25 years in happy marriage(here important word"happy"). Do you think their relationship was based on passion alone in the bedroom? Strongly unlikely. We invite you to check out other important things in relationships between men and women.
1. Common goals and desires
Even if everything is great in bed, but you want completely different things from life, then such a relationship will not stand the test of time. Alas and ah - one of you will always be unhappy.
No, it does not mean at all that the partners should be the same, like two drops of water. You may well love completely different things (books, music, for example). But when you start thinking about yourself in 10 years, you should have similar pictures.
2. Understanding
When your partner shares his problems with you, do you understand him? How does he feel when he talks about the troubles in the family? Or about conflicts at work? Can you talk openly about your needs and feelings? Are you not ashamed of your weaknesses? Do you ask each other for advice?
3. Support
When it seems that the whole world is against you, you should have a support and a feeling that "we have each other, and everything else will work out." It is important not to feel alone in trouble.
This "works" in the opposite direction - if your lover is in trouble, and he "stumbled." You will always help him get up and give him a shoulder.
4. Words that heal
It's important to talk to each other nice words. Very important. Do not neglect them, making excuses: “Well, it’s obvious that we love each other, since we are still together!”.
Compliments, words of gratitude, pride in your partner make the relationship only stronger!
5. Feeling of freedom
If you don't want your partner to see you sick or without makeup. Or if he is embarrassed by your loud laughter - this is definitely a bad sign.
Related article: How to communicate with a manso that he listens to you and takes you seriously.
In a good relationship, people should always feel at ease and comfortable. Even if you feel like making stupid faces, crying, not washing your hair for three days, and walking around in the same pajamas - you should know that this will not change his attitude towards you.
6. Openness to new sensations
Even more good sex can become routine. Good relationships, without a breath of freshness, also end badly.
That's why it's important that you have the desire to try new things - both in and out of the bedroom.
7. The pleasure of being together
Whether you are on an exotic trip or your own house you should enjoy the time you spend together.
It doesn't matter what you are doing:
discuss music,
do yoga,
play in Board games,
Or just watch TV shows.
It is important that you enjoy your time together, and the range of things you enjoy enjoying with each other is as wide as possible.
8. Proximity
Intimacy is more than just sex. These are also hugs, gentle strokes, massage, light playful biting. All of these strengthen relationships more effectively than orgasms.
9. Realistic expectations
Your partner is who he is. Yes, he may change during your relationship, but you can't count on a shy boy to be the life of the party. And an obese donut and book lover will not turn into a muscular bodybuilder.
Therefore, you must ask yourself the basic question: do you accept him as he is now? If this is not the case, and there are things that are bothering you, just talk to him about it.
10. Trust
Jealousy doesn't go far. Trust is one of the most important elements good relations. If you're tempted to control his phone, or he's making unfounded accusations against you, you've got a big problem.
A good relationship is one in which the partners feel secure and know that the other person will not harm or betray them. At least intentionally.
11. Independence and hobbies
100% of the time spent together and dependencies (for example, financial ones) harm the relationship. It's great if your partner is yours best friend but you can't live completely dependent on it.
You must have your own money, your hobbies, friends and bachelorette parties. And by the way, he does too.
You see, not everything is so easy and simple, and not everything is based on carnal passions. Love and respect each other!
Loving someone, giving them your life, and still getting something in return is incredibly difficult. Not every couple manages to keep their feelings for many years, although everyone dreams of this. To understand that the main thing in a relationship is possible only after a person enters into them, feels all the difficulties and problems in his own skin. And yet there are a few nuances here that are important for everyone to know.
Respect as the key to the longevity of love
Each couple independently decides what is important for them in a relationship, and what is secondary. Someone brings to the fore compatibility in bed, and it is important for someone to have common interests.
However family psychologists easily called the very secret that helps people to be together for many years. And his name is "Respect".
Passion decreases over time, the fire of love dies out, but this is not at all a reason for parting. What gives mutual respect to partners who have been in a relationship for a long time?
Thus, by treating a partner as an equal, a person will be able to reduce the number of quarrels and minimize the risk of separation. However, it is very important here that respectful attitude emerged from both sides. If only one person works on solving problems, and the second one shows indifference, this will not turn out to be good for lovers.
Important Factors Affecting the Longevity of a Novel
Unequivocally answer what is most important in love relationships extremely difficult. Both psychologists and lovers themselves call several nuances at once. Here are just the most popular answers to a difficult question:
Of course, the most important thing in a relationship is the presence of feelings, because without them, partners are unlikely to want to work on a joint future. It is difficult to tolerate the shortcomings of a spouse if he does not cause any positive emotions.
However, psychologists emphasize that one should not overemphasize elementary love chemistry. That same notorious passion, uncontrolled sexual attraction sooner or later passes. And if the lovers put sex at the forefront, they will certainly part, rushing headlong in search of new thrills.
Bet only on similar views or the same social status also by no means possible. The fact is that under the influence of a partner, aspirations, like views, can be transformed. And now the man who spoke yesterday about his love of freedom, today insists on the appearance of a baby. Similar aspirations and views that appear immediately are excellent, but thanks to the boundless desire for happiness, they can be changed by adjusting to your soulmate.
The family is always built on three pillars: respect, trust and feelings. If at least one component is missing, the couple is most likely doomed to parting. However, life is unpredictable, and sometimes feelings or trust do not arise immediately. Lovers have to work again and again to achieve perfection in love.
Daily work on feelings
What to do if you managed to meet a person who fully shares your views on life and aspirations? Most people think that in such a situation, you just need to enjoy what is happening without making any effort. However, this position is fundamentally wrong. Husband and wife should work on their relationship daily, talk and decide conflict situations to ultimately save the marriage from collapse.
How should lovers act if they are driven by the desire to work on relationships?
It's never too much strong relationship. Can destroy them accidental cheating, one minor quarrel. That is why even couples who have been living together for several decades need to work on a joint future.
Many psychologists note that it is precisely because of the lack of dialogue between partners that they gradually move away from each other. Main principle here is simple: sometimes forgetting about own interests, go towards your beloved, forgive him and make a contribution to a common happy future.
What not to do in a relationship
- offended by a partner, a person tries to do something out of spite;
- one should never perceive the loved one as something going or coming. The second half should be one and for life, the only and irreplaceable;
- it is necessary to avoid cheating by all means, while not trying to arouse the interest of a partner with the help of jealousy;
- even if a career starts to go uphill, you can’t push your soulmate into the background, atoning for your guilt with the help of gifts;
- also not recommended overexpression during quarrels, wanting to awaken the former passion.
Another mistake often cited by psychologists is the desire to compare their relationships with others. A guy and a girl can be extremely experienced, but this does not mean that they need to compare past feelings with their current ones. Also, you should not adopt a model of behavior from friends or relatives. Each couple is unique, and therefore it is so important for lovers to develop an individual model for the development of feelings.
Many girls make another mistake - they bow too much to their beloved. Feelings are so strong that the fair sex simply cannot cope with them. They forget about pride, about their own "I", completely dissolving in a partner. Usually such ladies forgive their soulmate any offenses, but without ending with anything good.
Understanding the dependence of a woman, a man pushes her around, and sometimes it comes to terrible humiliation. Both partners must be equal, both must go towards each other, sometimes stepping over pride.
To feel each other every minute, to understand and share the views of a partner - these are the main secrets successful relationship. By showing respect, boundless trust and love for a partner, while receiving the same in return, a partner will be able to find the very long-term happiness in the family that everyone dreams of.
Oksana, Snezhinsk
How often do you ask yourself this question, don't you? In this matter, I will try to help you. Some will listen and some won't. I will write my point of view on this issue.
Many people say that In a relationship, the most important thing is love. I think that love is an important thing, but understanding and trust- these are the things that form the basis of a strong “union of a man and a woman”, so to speak.
After all, if partners understand each other, then there is no “friction and civil strife”, as they try to keep quiet somewhere, and somewhere to express their opinion, make concessions, help, support in Hard time, as if complementing each other, and, accordingly, become a single whole.
There are many "little things" that are not given importance, but which, nevertheless, help to maintain warmth and respect in a relationship.
Try following some tips:
Listen carefully to your other half, without being distracted by anything else. Touch his (her) hand if she is upset about something. Give gifts, albeit small ones, not only on holidays, but also in common days. Compliment each other more often. Respect the feelings of the other, especially if he is very upset, do not pester with questions, do not be offended by his withdrawal into himself, by inadequate reactions. If you need privacy, let him/her know. Don't look away when he/she is talking to you. During the conversation, touch him (her) with your hand. Laugh at his (her) jokes. Don't take it out on each other Bad mood control the expression of your emotions and your behavior.
Accepting these signs of understanding, attention and respect, a woman feels calmer, more confident, more desirable and, accordingly, is even more “stretched” to her half, trying to become even better for him. Such signs make a man stronger and more attractive.
Now about trust. Let's start with the fact that if you do not trust, do not believe and doubt the words of your half, then the relationship will sooner or later come to naught, since the person is in constant voltage, and this tension eventually develops into depression and the person breaks down on his half and others.
I want to make it clear right away that this case we are talking about groundless distrust, that is, when it seems to him (her) that he (she) is not telling something or is telling a lie. Let me remind you normal person nothing should appear.
You can and should trust your half, but as the saying goes: "Trust, but verify." It doesn’t hurt to conduct a couple of checks from time to time, but you shouldn’t overdo it either, they made sure that he (she) is telling the truth and that’s it.
And in conclusion, I would like to mention about love as a feeling that I think comes with time, when a person understands that without his half he is like a fish without air, he cannot live.
This feeling also plays an important role in the relationship between a man and a woman. But do not forget that love is when you sacrifice something for the sake of your loved one, when you want to be always there. A person cannot be loved for something otherwise it is not love, but simply sympathy or falling in love; it's like doing good to people, because if good is done for some purpose, it is self-interest.
It is not so easy to find a person with whom you want, as they say, not only to fall asleep, but also to wake up, and therefore, if fate gives you a meeting with suitable partner, you need to make every effort not to destroy the relationship with wrong behavior. In this article we will tell you what is most important in a relationship between a man and a woman.
Three pillars of healthy relationships
Trust, understanding and respect are perhaps the main criteria healthy relationships. If all this is present in a relationship, it is very difficult to spoil them, because in trusting relationship there is no place for lies and jealousy - very common reasons couples quarrel. Of course, it is clear that two people cannot understand each other in absolutely all matters, and here respect comes to the rescue - as the ability to calmly accept a different point of view.
Passion
Relations between a man and a woman, in which there is trust, understanding and respect, but no passion, can hardly be called healthy and happy. However, people are arranged in such a way that strong attraction without additional stimulation is characteristic only for couples on initial stage their relationship. However, the couple attaches special importance to passion precisely at this stage.
How older relationship, topics greater value begin to play other values, such as special kinship and tenderness. However, we must not forget that for a man, passionate sex usually means much more than for a woman, and this just explains the fact that men cheat more often. However, this can be avoided by openly discussing your sexual problems and devising ways to rekindle the dead fire.
Common interests
Excellent relationship support - common interests. Today, fortunately, there are many different options for joint entertainment or teaching couples - dancing, sports, clay pot-making workshops, learning languages ... Even if at first glance it seems that no activity will be interesting for both members of the couple, after delving into your own soul and imagination, you can find something suitable . A man loves sports, and you are indifferent to him, but do you mind pulling up your figure? Try tennis - it is both a very active and very interesting sport.
Your corner
Spending time together, of course, perfectly strengthens relationships, but such a thing as "your own corner" must exist in a healthy couple. Especially relevant this moment for a couple who lives together. Sometimes a person just needs to be alone with himself, maybe he will spend this time lying on the couch, maybe looking at stupid pictures on the Internet, maybe reading deeply intellectual literature. Do not try to impose your own and make fun of the activity that your partner is doing in your corner, leave at least some personal space.
Is it worth trying?
Either way, building and maintaining relationships is hard work. Even in a couple where understanding, trust and respect reign, quarrels can sometimes occur, if only because someone got up on the wrong foot. Unfortunately, most often we take out our bad mood on our loved ones, and they get it simply because they are always there.
Nevertheless, how to understand whether it is worth trying, overcoming difficulties and disputes? Simply put, how to understand whether the person is right in front of you and is it exactly with him that you are destined to live your whole life? This, of course, is a complex and ambiguous question, but there are hints here - if you agree on the main moral principles and life goals, perhaps it's worth a try.
Why do couples break up?
Couples with experience break up most often due to a large number accumulated unresolved conflicts against the backdrop of subsided passion. The phrase "make peace in bed" is known to everyone, but this is a destructive practice. Passion will subside sooner or later, and normal way the couple will not resolve the conflict.
Remember the three words - "trust, understanding, respect" - and understand that if you follow these three postulates from the very beginning of the relationship, unresolved conflicts will not accumulate, you will be able to talk frankly about all your disagreements and problems, and, for sure, it will not be difficult for you to find compromise.
In fact, each of us wants to find really loving person who could always be there, support and trust. But build real harmonious relationship not given to everyone. Someone simply does not know what kind of partner he needs, and someone simply does not know how to love, give love and receive it. However, at the same time, many are wondering what is still the most important thing in the relationship between a girl and a guy.
In principle, the relationship between a woman and a man can be compared to a complex mechanism that has a lot of levers and gears. And the ideal connection will be the one in which all the details of the mechanism work perfectly. And when faulty parts appear, various failures occur. To determine where the breakdown is, you need to understand the features of the functioning of the mechanism.
Wanting to know what is the most important thing between a man and a woman, readers of "Popular about Health" may not understand that there are no identical people in the world. classic models. For example, if a guy and a girl have high moral qualities, the main thing in a relationship is high trust in each other.
Accordingly, such an alliance may break up even in response to an insignificant flirtation of one of them on the side. And in the presence of complex life situations their relationship will only become stronger thanks to mutual assistance.
Many couples feel great only in conditions of comfort, which becomes the main thing for them in a relationship. Accordingly, they can part because of domestic troubles, violations of personal space and endless nit-picking.
Many couples - lovers of comfort - face a period of quarrels over small things, and only the presence sincere feelings helps them move to new level relations. But in the absence of love, such partners easily part, setting off in search of sincerity, which until now was not so important to them.
Many psychologists claim that the success of a relationship between a guy and a girl depends primarily on how selflessly they participate in building an alliance. After all, this is actually quite difficult work. In the event that one lover makes fewer attempts to develop and maintain relationships, and the second more, this will eventually become the cause of discontent, quarrels and protracted scandals.
Another very important component of successful relationships is sincerity and honesty. Only under the condition of the absence of lies and omissions can one achieve high level trust. Honest friend in front of a friend, couples never try to cope with relationship problems separately, but always overcome difficult life moments together, shoulder to shoulder. If the relationship is based on deceit, you definitely won’t expect strength from them.
One of the most important points in relationships, it is the ability to accept a partner as he is, refusing to idealize the other half. In fact, the ability to take off in time pink glasses helps to accept each other as they are. Indeed, otherwise, you can eventually face disappointment from shortcomings, and not even notice the merits.
Of course, a great relationship is hard to imagine without having common interests. After all joint classes, common topics for conversations and a common company of friends helps to be closer friend to each other, to be on the same wavelength and understand each other. Therefore, couples who seem to have nothing in common with each other should look for common ground, acquire shared memories and different traditions.
Another important component of excellent relationships is the ability to negotiate, listen and hear each other, and compromise. If a guy and a girl are not ready to give in to each other in small things and more serious issues, they may have certain difficulties with maintaining the union. As practice shows, many lovers part out of stupidity, for the reason that they cannot understand each other, they hear only their momentary emotions and desires.
In order for a relationship to be strong, a woman needs to remember:
It is important for all men to be the main ones in relationships, to have the right to a decisive vote in various issues;
A man is not obliged to share completely her preferences and interests;
No need to try to change habitual image partner's life
It is important to provide the guy with support and be able to listen to him;
It is necessary to see a real hero in the face of a partner;
A man should be given the opportunity to protect, take care, make sweet romantic surprises;
Do not infringe on the personal freedom and space of a partner;
It is important to remain well-groomed, passionate, educated, etc.
Men, on the other hand, need to remember:
Women need care, love and warmth;
They need to be pampered, often pleased with small surprises;
It is important for a woman, like a man, to be heard and her opinion taken into account;
Sometimes you need to listen to your partner, supporting her;
It is necessary to give the girl the opportunity to be weak, to protect her and take care of her;
It is important not to try to change the habitual rhythm of your partner's life;
It is necessary to allow a woman to take care of herself, the house and children, emphasizing the importance of her care;
You should remain well-groomed, close and passionate.
In fact, of course, there is no recipe ideal relationship. And who said that ideality is what you really need to strive for. It is important that you and your chosen one feel good. Happiness is what real relationships are really impossible without.
Ekaterina, www.site
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