The influence of the family on the development of the personality of the child. How does the family influence the development of a person?

Many are accustomed to thinking that a large family is good. But if relatives do not exceed 10 people in number, then most likely one of your relatives will be out of work, someone is sitting on a bottle, and someone is waiting for the weather by the sea and does not develop at all. This happens very often for one reason: there is not enough motivation for personal, physical, intellectual development.

Someone older took a sip of problems and managed to adapt to active social life, works, receives a salary, has a separate housing and is planning or has already had children, and someone younger is completely limp and sits on his parents' neck, is passionate about rock music, has a bad figure, has a violent and not very pleasant disposition - in general, this person will be rather unpleasant to us than like a kindred love.

Much in the family depends on the father. The father, as a patriarch, with his will, can direct the emotional climate to the area where the older child will definitely have the utmost composure and diligence, there will always be someone creative in the family, without the will of the father there will be no wedding or trip, and the mother is balanced and everything in moderation ( including a minimum of pets, but also a minimum of children).

One has only to give slack to the father, the female component takes over: elder sister will give birth to a second child - you will not have time to turn around, younger son goes into rampant drunkenness, children develop allergies, blues, the mother is prone to changing marriage partners and pays less attention to her children. This dynamic takes place in different forms, but the essence is the same: the will of the father cements the family.

However, patriarchy has certain Negative consequences: lifelong competition (the brothers never stop competing in material terms), emotional constraint (there are no military dancers in the family, as a rule), older children are often drawn to sexual perversions, and the suppressed will of the mother leads to the fact that her care becomes monstrously pernicious in terms of parenting, children tend to get apathetic at times when they have to make their own decisions (and decisions are not made in the end).

In a family where the mother or father is athletes, principles are imposed physical development which by modern standards are not always beneficial. In general, the prediction where will he go the development of each family member always implies binding rules that often give rise to conflicts.

The “goodness” of the mother pushes the daughter to constant resistance to her will, she strives to obtain truthful information about outside world and along with this - the ability to independently use and interpret it, and the template for development is the worst that our environment can offer us.

We all want to return to the family and not follow its narrow interests. We want to share the fruits of our personal development, not pay tribute. Therefore, a narrow family space is a suitable environment for all sorts of conflicts, disappointments and psychological collisions.

Family is the information that we carry all our lives in our head. We throw away information garbage, but what we absorb from childhood programs us right up to old age. How does a father or mother behave, did you have more soldiers than your brother - any little thing becomes a fuse for emotional outbursts during adulthood. We unconsciously and unwillingly repeat like mantras every day: "but my brother ...", "my mother would say that ...", "oh, my father would have heard it!" etc.

A sense of family duty permeates us because we give it the highest priority of trust! And it ruins us every time we are not able to lower this priority where it is needed.

In general, the family emotionally saturates the life of each of its members, but the vast majority of people are not able to make a psychological breakthrough - a break from hardened and stationary information about themselves in order to embark on the path of individual development.

In psychology, there is a separation of the concepts of the individual, personality and individuality. The founder of this classification is A.N. Leontiev. According to his theory, personality is the subject of social relations and conscious human activity. It follows from this that the formation of personality is impossible without social environment.

Family Influence

The institution of the family is credited with the main role in shaping the personality, because it is she who is the first social group with which the child meets. It is here that the child receives the first ideas about the world and society, which is the foundation for all subsequent human development. The significance of the influence of the family is enhanced by the strong emotional and social dependence of the members of the group on each other, as well as the duration of the impact; according to these indicators, no other institution of socialization can compete with the family.

It is the family that lays down the basic structures of the personality: the style of relations with other people, which he receives through observation of the behavior of his parents. Exactly personal example parents have the greatest influence, not reproaches and instructions. Through interaction with adults, the child receives the first ideas about himself, which is why attention and care are so important. Flaw parental love may lead to complexes in the future. Also, the child in the family forms an idea of himself as a representative of the female or male sex, learns to correct his behavior in accordance with these ideas. Moral values are formed, the child learns what is “good” and “bad”. Thanks to communication with, it forms life meanings, as well as aspirations and ideals, gets a sense of the connection between generations, learns to perceive oneself as part of a group, thereby forming a sense of belonging.

But the most important acquisition is that the child learns to communicate. Based on his views and attitudes, he forms a style of communication, learns to interact with people around him. Of great importance here is the support of adults, it allows the child not to become isolated in failures, but to make new attempts.

However, the family will not have a decisive influence throughout a person's life. In psychology, it is generally accepted that with school entry, a new institution of socialization appears in a child's life. Now a big impact will have school teacher and peers. In later life, new significant social groups will appear, however, by the age of 7, the child has already laid the foundations of personality, which means that further behavior can only be adjusted, therefore, in terms of the strength of influence and influence, it is the family that is the main one in personality development.

All living organisms develop according to their genetic code or blueprint. Psychologists, speaking of the process of development in connection with the genetic plan, use the term "maturation". The maturation process consists of a sequence of programmed changes not only appearance organism, but also its complexity, integration, organization and function. Not proper nutrition or disease can slow down maturation, but this does not mean that proper nutrition, good health and even specially undertaken stimulation and training should hasten it.

Socialization is a general process by which a person becomes a member of a social group: family, community, clan. Socialization includes the assimilation of all attitudes, opinions, customs, life values, roles and expectations of a particular social group. This process lasts a lifetime, helping people to find spiritual comfort and feel full members of society or some cultural group within this society.

Relationships in the family

personality family child childhood

Among the various social factors, influencing the formation of personality, one of the most important is the family. Traditionally, the family main institute education. What a person acquires in the family, he retains throughout his subsequent life. The importance of the family is due to the fact that a person stays in it for a significant part of his life. In the family, the foundations of personality are laid.

In the process of close relationships with mother, father, brothers, sisters, grandfathers, grandmothers and other relatives, a personality structure begins to form in a child from the first days of life.

In the family, the personality of not only the child, but also his parents is formed. The upbringing of children enriches the personality of an adult, enhances his social experience. Most often this occurs unconsciously in parents, but in Lately young parents began to meet, consciously educating themselves as well. Unfortunately, this position of parents has not become popular, despite the fact that it deserves the closest attention.

Parents play a big and responsible role in the life of every person. They give the child new patterns of behavior, with their help he learns the world He imitates them in all his actions. This trend is increasingly reinforced by the child's positive emotional bonds with his parents and his desire to be like his mother and father. When parents realize this pattern and understand that the formation of the child's personality largely depends on them, they behave in such a way that all their actions and behavior in general contribute to the formation in the child of those qualities and such an understanding of human values that they want to convey to him. Such a process of education can be considered quite conscious, because. constant control over one's behavior, attitude towards other people, attention to the organization family life allows raising children in the most favorable conditions that contribute to their comprehensive and harmonious development.

The family influences the personality of adults not only in connection with the upbringing of children. Relationships between family members play an important role different generations, as well as within the same generation (spouses, brothers, sisters, grandfathers, grandmothers). Family is small social group influences its members. At the same time, each of them, with his personal qualities, his behavior, affects the life of the family. Individual members of this small group can contribute to the formation of the spiritual values of its members, influence the goals and attitudes of the whole family.

All stages of development require a person to adapt to new social conditions helping the individual to be enriched with new experience, to become socially more mature. Many stages of family development can be foreseen and even prepared for them. However, in life there are situations that cannot be foreseen, because. arise instantly, as if spontaneously, for example, a serious illness of one of the family members, the birth of a sick child, death loved one, troubles at work, etc. . Such phenomena also require adaptation from family members, because. they have to find new methods of relationships. overcoming crisis situation most often enhances the cohesion of people. However, it happens that such a situation becomes a turning point in the life of the family, leads to its disintegration, disorganizes its life.

The family is of great importance for the development of the individual. Children who are deprived of the opportunity to directly and constantly participate in the life of a small group consisting of people close to them, lose a lot. This is especially noticeable in young children living outside the family - in orphanages and other institutions of this type. The development of the personality of these children often proceeds in a different way than in children brought up in a family. mental and social development these children are sometimes late, and the emotional is slowed down. The same thing can happen with an adult, because. the lack of constant personal contacts is the essence of loneliness, becomes the source of many negative phenomena and causes serious personality disorders.

It is known that the behavior of many people is influenced by the presence of other persons. Many individuals behave differently in the presence of other people than when they are alone. Moreover, if a person feels benevolent, good relations present, then he most often has a certain incentive to such actions that will arouse the approval of the people around him and help him appear in best light. If a person feels an unfriendly attitude, then he has resistance, which manifests itself in the most different ways. Fine well-mannered person overcomes this protest with a conscious effort.

In a small group where friendly relations reign, the team has a very strong influence on an individual. This is especially evident in the formation of spiritual values, norms and patterns of behavior, the style of relationships between people. Due to their characteristics, the family small group creates for its members such conditions for emotional needs, which, helping a person to feel his belonging to society, increase his sense of security and peace, cause a desire to help and support other people.

The family has its own structure, defined by the social roles of its members: husband and wife, father and mother, son and daughter, sister and brother, grandfather and grandmother. Based on these roles, interpersonal relationships in the family are formed. The degree of participation of a person in family life can be very diverse, and depending on this, the family can have a greater or lesser influence on a person.

The family plays a colossal role in the life and activities of society. The functions of the family can be considered both from the standpoint of the implementation of the goals of society, and from the standpoint of fulfilling their obligations in relation to society. The family as a microstructure satisfies important social needs and performs important social functions.

Thanks to its reproductive function family is the source of continuation human life. This is the social group that initially forms the personality of a person. The family helps to increase the creative and productive forces of society. The family introduces its new members into society, passing them the language, customs and customs, the basic patterns of behavior that are mandatory in this society, introduces a person into the world of the spiritual values of society, controls the behavior of its members. Social features families are manifested not only in relation to children, but also in relation to spouses, tk. marriage is a process that plays a large role in the life of society. One of main functions families -- the creation of conditions for the development of the personality of all its members. The family satisfies the various needs of the individual. In marriage, husband and wife find the happiness of intimate intercourse. The birth of children causes joy not only from the consciousness of the continuation of one's kind, but also makes it possible to look more confidently into the future. In a family, people take care of each other. Also, the family is satisfied with a variety of different needs person. IN married life a person most clearly manifests a feeling of love and mutual understanding, recognition, respect, a sense of security. However, the satisfaction of their needs is associated with the performance of certain functions of the family.

Unfortunately, families do not always fulfill their functions. In such cases, the problem of the asocial role of the family arises. Families that are unable to provide security for their members do not fulfill their functions, the necessary conditions life and mutual assistance, if some values are incorrectly presented in the family. In addition, when a family brings up emotionally immature people with a weakened sense of danger, with human qualities far from social norms, it harms its people.

Considering the role of the family in the life of every person, it is also necessary to note its psychological function, because it is in the family that all those personality traits that are of value to society are formed.

Each person throughout his life, as a rule, is a member of two families: the parent, from which he comes, and the family that he creates himself. Life in the family of parents accounts for periods approximately up to adolescence. During the period of maturity, a person gradually gains independence. The further, the more life, professional and social experience a person accumulates, and the family begins to play an increasingly important role for him.

For family development milestone is the entry of a man and a woman into a marital union. The birth of the first-born opens the parental stage, and after the children acquire independence, we can talk about the phase of secondary married life. Different periods in the life of a family correspond to different periods of time and different needs. Determining the duration of individual periods of a family's life is difficult due to the different timing of partners entering into marriage. In this regard, it can be very difficult to link the development of the family with the periods of personality development, but the coordination of the seed and life cycles is necessary.

From the point of view of social psychology, marriage is a special group consisting of two persons of the opposite sex. These are two personalities, two individuals who have decided to spend their later life. Spouses mutually satisfy emotional, social, intimate needs, help each other in achieving personal goals, together strive to improve material conditions their lives, jointly create the economic base of the family. The foundations of the family are formed by the social positions of the spouses in relation to each other. The leading role in the family usually belongs to the spouse who has more influence, knows how to make decisions when problems arise in the process. life together. Usually it is a man, but nowadays there is both a shift in the headship in the family towards a woman, and the equality of spouses. It goes without saying that in determining family positions, an important role is played by cultural traditions, as well as the personality traits of each of the spouses. The formation of the structure, and consequently, the distribution of roles in the family, is seriously influenced by the changes taking place in the social microstructure. The distribution of responsibilities in the family is connected with the roles that the husband and wife have assumed.

After the creation of the family, the process of mutual adaptation to each other begins. And here great importance knows how people's ability to compromise, show tolerance and restrain themselves in conflict situations. Difficulties that arise in family life very often become the cause of a marriage crisis, and in some cases the help of a psychologist is desirable, but in most cases young people cope on their own.

The birth of a child is a significant event in the life of the spouses, indicating the entry of the family into new period development. This is another test for the spouses. They begin to fulfill new social roles - mother and father; entering a new social role is always difficult and requires preparation. IN this case that preparation is pregnancy. Future parents are gradually preparing themselves in thought and imagination for the change that is to take place in their lives; at the same time they are preparing their environment. They have to seriously change the established life. During pregnancy, the spouses begin to form attitudes towards the unborn child. Here factors such as the desire or undesirability of the child, as well as the desire of one of the parents to have a child of a certain gender, matter. All of this will have an impact on your upbringing.

The roles of parents are comprehensive and multifaceted. Parents are responsible for the child's choice of life position. The birth of a child and the need to provide him with conditions for development entail a certain reorganization home life. But in addition to caring for children, the roles of parents also extend to the formation of the child's personality, the world of his thoughts, feelings, aspirations, to the education of his own "I". Harmonious development personality of the child is associated not only with the presence and vigorous activity in the family of each of the parents, but also by the consistency of their educational actions. Differences in educational methods and interpersonal relationships of parents do not allow the child to understand and comprehend what is good and what is bad. In addition, when the consent between the parents is violated, when the people closest to the child, the people who are his support, are in a quarrel, and besides, he hears that this is happening for reasons that concern him, then he cannot feel confident and safe. . And hence the children's anxiety, fears and even neurotic symptoms. Relationships between family members are very important for a child. And it is especially important for him to understand how adults treat him.

Character emotional attitude parents to the child can be called a parental position. This is one of critical factors that shape the child's personality. There are several variations of this factor, from dominance to complete indifference. And the constant imposition of contacts, and their complete absence is harmful to the child. It is very important to establish contact with the child, so that later you can talk about the bestowal on the part of the child. First of all, the child must be approached without exaggerated concentration of attention, but also without excessive emotional distance, i.e. free contact is needed, and not tense or too weak and random. It's about about such an approach, which can be described as balanced, free, directed to the mind and heart of the child, focused on his real needs. This should be an approach based on a certain independence, moderately categorical and persistent, which is a support and authority for the child, and not an overbearing command order or a compliant, passive request. Disturbances in contact with the child manifest themselves in several characteristic forms, for example, excessive aggressiveness or the desire to correct the child's behavior.

From the early age the right process The development of the child is carried out primarily thanks to the care of the parents. A small child learns from his parents to think, speak, understand and control his reactions. Thanks to the personal models that his parents are for him, he learns how to relate to other family members, relatives, acquaintances: whom to love, whom to avoid, whom to more or less reckon with, whom to express his sympathy or antipathy, when to restrain his reactions. The family prepares the child for the future independent living in society, conveys to him spiritual values, moral norms, patterns of behavior, traditions, culture of his society. The guiding, coordinated educational methods of the parents teach the child to be relaxed, at the same time he learns to control his actions and deeds in accordance with moral standards. The child develops a world of values. In this multifaceted development, parents, by their behavior and their own example, help the child great help. However, some parents can make it difficult, slow down, even disrupt the behavior of their children, contributing to the manifestation of pathological personality traits in him.

A child brought up in a family where parents are personal models for him receives training for subsequent social roles: women or men, wife or husband, mother or father. In addition, social pressure is quite strong. Children are usually praised for their gender-appropriate behaviors and blamed for their gender-specific behaviors. opposite sex. correct sex education child, the formation of a sense of belonging to their gender is one of the foundations for the further development of their personality.

As a result of the reasonable use of incentives, the development of incentives can accelerate the development of a person as a person, make it more successful than using punishments and prohibitions. If, nevertheless, there is a need for punishment, then, in order to enhance the educational effect, punishments should, if possible, follow immediately after the misconduct that deserves it. Punishment is more effective if the offense for which the child is punished is explained to him in an accessible way. Very harsh things can cause fear in a child or embitter him. Any physical impact forms the child's belief that he, too, will be able to act by force when something does not suit him.

The behavior of the child largely depends on the upbringing in the family. Preschoolers, for example, often see themselves through the eyes of adults. Thus, a positive or negative attitude towards him from adults forms his self-esteem. Children with low self-esteem are dissatisfied with themselves. This happens in families where parents often scold the child or set excessive tasks for him. In addition, a child who sees that parents do not get along often blames himself for this, and as a result, self-esteem is again underestimated. Such a child feels that he does not correspond to the wishes of his parents. There is another extreme - inflated self-esteem. This usually happens in families where the child is encouraged in small ways, and the punishment system is very soft.

It goes without saying that children with inadequate self-esteem subsequently create problems for themselves and their loved ones. Therefore, from the very beginning, parents should try to form in their child adequate self-esteem. Here we need a flexible system of punishment and praise. Admiration and praise are excluded in front of a child, gifts are rarely given for deeds, extremely harsh punishments are not used.

In addition to self-esteem, parents also set the level of the child's claims - what he claims in his activities and relationships. Children with a high level of aspirations, high self-esteem and prestigious motivation count only on success, and in case of failure, they can get severe mental trauma. Children with low level claims and low self-esteem do not claim much either in the future or in the present. They do not set high goals for themselves and constantly doubt their abilities, quickly put up with failures, but at the same time they often achieve a lot.

Each family objectively develops a certain, far from always conscious system of education. Here we have in mind the understanding of the goals of education, and the methods of education, and the consideration of what can and cannot be allowed in relation to the child. 4 tactics of upbringing in the family can be distinguished and 4 types corresponding to them family relations, which are the prerequisite and result of their occurrence: diktat, guardianship, "non-intervention" and cooperation.

Dictatorship in the family is manifested in the systematic suppression of children's initiative and self-esteem by parents. Of course, parents can and should make demands on their child, based on the goals of education, moral standards, specific situations in which it is necessary to make pedagogically and morally justified decisions. However, those who prefer order and violence to all types of influence face the resistance of the child, who responds to pressure, coercion, threats with hypocrisy, deceit, outbursts of rudeness, and sometimes outright hatred. But even if the resistance turns out to be broken, along with it there is a breakdown of many personality traits: independence, self-esteem, initiative, faith in oneself and one's capabilities, all this is a guarantee of unsuccessful personality formation.

Custody in the family is a system of relations in which parents, by ensuring the satisfaction of all the needs of the child with their work, protect him from any worries, efforts and difficulties, taking them upon themselves. The question of the active formation of personality fades into the background. Parents, in fact, block the process of seriously preparing their children for reality beyond the threshold of their home. Such over-concern about the child, excessive control over his entire life, based on close emotional contact is called hyperprotection. It leads to passivity, dependence, difficulties in communication. There is also an opposite concept - hypo-guardianship, which implies a combination of an indifferent attitude parental relationship With total absence control. Children can do whatever they want. As a result, when they grow up, they become selfish, cynical people who are not able to respect anyone, do not deserve respect themselves, but still demand the fulfillment of all their whims.

System interpersonal relationships in the family, based on the recognition of the possibility and even expediency of the independent existence of adults from children, can be generated by the tactics of "non-intervention". This assumes that two worlds can coexist: adults and children, and neither one nor the other should cross the line thus outlined. Most often, this type of relationship is based on the passivity of parents as educators.

Cooperation as a type of relationship in the family involves the mediation of interpersonal relationships in the family by common goals and objectives joint activities, its organization and high moral values. It is in this situation that the egoistic individualism of the child is overcome. The family, where the leading type of relationship is cooperation, acquires a special quality, becomes a group. high level development - as a team.

Many parents with bated breath are waiting for the so-called transitional age at their children. For some, this transition from childhood to adulthood happens completely unnoticed, for someone it becomes a real disaster. Until recently obedient and calm child suddenly becomes "prickly", irritated, he now and then comes into conflict with others. This often causes an ill-conceived negative reaction from parents and teachers. Their mistake is that they are trying to subdue the teenager to their will, and this only hardens, pushes him away from adults and, worst of all, breaks the growing person, making him an insincere opportunist or still obedient until he loses his "I ". Adolescent independence is expressed mainly in the desire for emancipation from adults, liberation from their guardianship and control. Needing their parents, their love and care, their opinion, they experience desire be independent, equal with them. How relations develop during this difficult period for both parties and after it depends mainly on the style of upbringing that has developed in the family, and the parents' ability to rebuild - to accept the feeling of adulthood of their child. There are 3 styles of parenting - authoritarian, democratic and permissive.

At authoritarian style the desire of the parent is the law for the child. Such parents suppress their children. They demand unquestioning obedience from the teenager and do not consider it necessary to explain to him the reasons for their instructions and prohibitions. They tightly control all spheres of a teenager's life, and they do this not always correctly. Children in such families usually become isolated, their communication with their parents is disrupted. Some adolescents go into conflict, but more often children growing up in such a family adapt to the style of family relationships and become insecure, less independent.

The democratic style of family relations is the most optimal for education. Democratic parents value both independence and discipline in the behavior of a teenager. They themselves grant him the right to be independent in some areas of his life; without prejudice to rights, at the same time demand the fulfillment of duties; they respect his opinion and consult with him. Control based on warm feelings and reasonable care usually does not annoy a teenager too much; he often listens to explanations why one should not do one thing and another should be done. The formation of adulthood under such circumstances occurs without any special experiences and conflicts.

With a conniving style, parents almost do not pay attention to their children, do not restrict them in anything, do not prohibit anything. Adolescents from such families often fall under bad influence, can raise a hand against their parents, they have almost no values.

No matter how smoothly teenage years conflicts cannot be avoided. Conflicts most often arise when parents treat a teenager as little child, as well as every little thing - from the way a teenager dresses to the question of the hour until which he is allowed to be out of the house. To find mutual language with a teenager, you need to try to perceive him as an equal partner who just has less life experience so far, be interested in his problems, delve into all the difficulties that arise in his life and help him. In this case, the teenager will definitely repay his parents with attention and care on his part.

It is not true that the family affects only the development of the child, and adults are not affected by this. The importance of such a social institution as the family cannot be overestimated even more adulthood. How does the family influence the life and attitude of a person?

Aspects of the family

The existence of the family is determined by the need of people for reproduction - both physical and mental. The following aspects of the family are distinguished:

Biological aspect: parents and children.
The family as one of the social institutions, which is characterized by its social norms, patterns of behavior, rights, obligations, sanctions. All these norms are designed to effectively regulate relations in the family.
Economic aspect families: community of a family connected by economic interest (family budget).
Territorial aspect families: an association of persons living together.

Social functions of the family

in different historical eras and in different types societies, certain functions of the family came to the fore. It would seem that today's family has already lost some of the functions that it had in the past, for example, protective and production. However, it retained some of its functions. Probably, this is exactly what has not given and does not give the family how social institution die, as predicted by some scholars.

reproductive function. The problem of childbearing is one of the main problems in the family. Psychologists recognize that the strength of the family and conjugal love largely determine sexual relations. The future of the family and the climate within it will depend on how harmonious this sphere will be.
Regenerative. Associated with inheritance - surnames, status, social position and, of course, property. Even when your grandmother gives you family earrings or an album with old photographs, all this will be a manifestation of the regenerative function of the family.
Socialization function(or educational). Satisfying the needs of men and women in fatherhood and motherhood, raising children, self-realization of parents in children.
Economic. Everything related to the budget and daily activities: food, purchases and maintenance of various property, purchase of clothes, organization of life and life, etc.
social control. The family establishes certain norms (regulations) of relations between its members, the behavior of children and parents, their obligations to each other, as well as obligations to the older generation.
Recreational function. Recreation, organization of leisure and entertainment, care for the health of family members.
function of spiritual communication, mutual enrichment and development.
status. Allows you to give family members a certain status in society (mother, wife, father, husband).
Psychotherapeutic function. For us, the support, advice and approval of our family is extremely important. This function began to occupy one of the first positions in our time. Today, its future depends on the stability of positive emotional relationships within the family.

Thus, for any adult, the family is very important. It allows you to satisfy a number of needs of the individual. This is a small collective that makes various and often very complex demands on its members.

The term "development" refers to changes that occur over time in the structure of the body, thinking or human behavior as a result of biological processes in the body and exposure to environment.

All living organisms develop according to their genetic code or blueprint. Psychologists, speaking of the process of development in connection with the genetic plan, use the term "maturation." The process of maturation consists of a sequence of programmed changes not only in the appearance of an organism, but also in its complexity, integration, organization and function. Improper nutrition or disease may slow maturation, but this does not mean that proper nutrition, good health, and even specially undertaken stimulation and training should hasten it.

The maturation of body organs and motor abilities proceeds at different rates. Each organ or ability usually has its own point of optimal maturity. The term "growth" generally means an increase in size, functionality, or complexity to such a point. The term "aging" refers to the biological changes that occur after the point of optimal maturity has been passed. At the same time, aging processes do not necessarily imply a decline in activity or wear and tear of the body. Just as aging improves the quality of some wines, it can increase human judgment and insight. In addition, it should be noted that the aging of some body tissues begins already in adolescence and even in childhood.

Every moment we are exposed to the environment. Light, sound, heat, food, and more can serve basic biological and psychological needs, cause serious harm, attract attention, or become components of learning. Some environmental impacts are temporary. However, many other environmental influences can be permanent. Environmental influences can retard or stimulate the growth of an organism, generate persistent anxiety, or contribute to the formation of complex skills.

Family as the main factor influencing the formation of personality.

Among the various social factors influencing the formation of personality, one of the most important is the family. Traditionally, the family is the main institution of education. What a person acquires in the family, he retains throughout his subsequent life. The importance of the family is due to the fact that a person stays in it for a significant part of his life. In the family, the foundations of personality are laid.

In the family, the personality of not only the child, but also his parents is formed. The upbringing of children enriches the personality of an adult, enhances his social experience. Most often, this occurs unconsciously in parents, but recently young parents have begun to meet, consciously educating themselves as well. Unfortunately, this position of parents has not become popular, despite the fact that it deserves the closest attention.

Parents play a big and responsible role in the life of every person. They give the child new patterns of behavior, with their help he learns the world around him, he imitates them in all his actions. This trend is increasingly reinforced by the child's positive emotional bonds with his parents and his desire to be like his mother and father. When parents realize this pattern and understand that the formation of the child's personality largely depends on them, they behave in such a way that all their actions and behavior in general contribute to the formation in the child of those qualities and such an understanding of human values that they want to convey to him. Such a process of education can be considered quite conscious, because. constant control over one's behavior, attitude towards other people, attention to the organization of family life allows raising children in the most favorable conditions that contribute to their comprehensive and harmonious development.

The family influences the personality of adults not only in connection with the upbringing of children. An important role is played in the family by relationships between representatives of different generations, as well as within the same generation (spouses, brothers, sisters, grandfathers, grandmothers). The family as a small social group influences its members. At the same time, each of them, with his personal qualities, his behavior, affects the life of the family. Individual members of this small group can contribute to the formation of the spiritual values of its members, influence the goals and attitudes of the whole family.

All stages of development require a person to adapt to new social conditions, helping the individual to be enriched with new experience, to become more socially mature. Many stages of family development can be foreseen and even prepared for them. However, in life there are situations that cannot be foreseen, because. arise instantly, as if spontaneously, for example, a serious illness of one of the family members, the birth of a sick child, the death of a loved one, trouble at work, etc. Such phenomena also require adaptation from family members, because. they have to find new methods of relationships. Overcoming a crisis situation most often strengthens the cohesion of people. However, it happens that such a situation becomes a turning point in the life of the family, leads to its disintegration, disorganizes its life.

The family is of great importance for the development of the individual. Children who are deprived of the opportunity to directly and constantly participate in the life of a small group consisting of people close to them, lose a lot. This is especially noticeable in young children living outside the family - in orphanages and other institutions of this type. The development of the personality of these children often proceeds in a different way than in children brought up in a family. The mental and social development of these children is sometimes delayed, and the emotional development is slowed down. The same thing can happen with an adult, because. the lack of constant personal contacts is the essence of loneliness, becomes the source of many negative phenomena and causes serious personality disorders.

It is known that the behavior of many people is influenced by the presence of other persons. Many individuals behave differently in the presence of other people than when they are alone. Moreover, if a person feels a benevolent, kind attitude of those present, then he most often has a certain incentive for such actions that will cause the approval of the people around him and help him appear in the best light. If a person feels an unfriendly attitude, then he has resistance, which manifests itself in a variety of ways. A well-bred person overcomes this protest with a conscious effort.

In a small group where friendly relations reign, the collective has a very strong influence on the individual. This is especially evident in the formation of spiritual values, norms and patterns of behavior, the style of relationships between people. Due to its characteristics, the family as a small group creates for its members such conditions for emotional needs, which, helping a person to feel his belonging to society, increase his sense of security and peace, cause a desire to help and support other people.

performs important social functions.

Due to its reproductive function, the family is the source of the continuation of human life. This is the social group that initially forms the personality of a person. The family helps to increase the creative and productive forces of society. The family introduces its new members into society, passing them the language, customs and customs, the basic patterns of behavior that are mandatory in this society, introduces a person into the world of the spiritual values of society, controls the behavior of its members. The social functions of the family are manifested not only in relation to children, but also in relation to spouses, because marriage is a process that plays a large role in the life of society. One of the main functions of the family is to create conditions for the development of the personality of all its members. The family satisfies the various needs of the individual. In marriage, husband and wife find the happiness of intimate intercourse. The birth of children causes joy not only from the consciousness of the continuation of one's kind, but also makes it possible to look more confidently into the future. In a family, people take care of each other. Also, the family meets the various needs of a person. In the married life of a person, the feeling of love and mutual understanding, recognition, respect, and a sense of security are most clearly manifested. However, the satisfaction of their needs is associated with the performance of certain functions of the family.

Unfortunately, families do not always fulfill their functions. In such cases, the problem of the asocial role of the family arises. Families that are not able to provide their members with security, the necessary living conditions and mutual assistance do not fulfill their functions if certain values are incorrectly presented in the family. In addition, when a family brings up emotionally immature people with a weakened sense of danger, with human qualities far from social norms, it harms its people.

Considering the role of the family in the life of each person, it is also necessary

note its psychological function, tk. it is in the family that all those

personality traits that are of value to society.

Each person throughout his life, as a rule, is a member of two families: the parent, from which he comes, and the family that he creates himself. Life in the family of parents accounts for periods until about adolescence. During the period of maturity, a person gradually gains independence. The further, the more life, professional and social experience a person accumulates, and the family begins to play an increasingly important role for him.

For the development of the family, a very important stage is the entry of a man and a woman into a marital union. The birth of the first-born opens the parental stage, and after the children acquire independence, we can talk about the phase of secondary married life. Different periods in the life of a family correspond to different periods of time and different needs. Determining the duration of individual periods of a family's life is difficult due to the different timing of partners entering into marriage. In this regard, it can be very difficult to link the development of the family with the periods of personality development, but the coordination of the seed and life cycles is necessary.

From the point of view of social psychology, marriage is a special group consisting of two persons of the opposite sex. These are two personalities, two individuals who have decided to spend their future lives together. Spouses mutually satisfy emotional, social, intimate needs, help each other in achieving personal goals, together strive to improve the material conditions of their lives, jointly create the economic base of the family. The foundations of the family are formed by the social positions of the spouses in relation to each other. The leading role in the family usually belongs to the spouse who has more influence, knows how to make decisions when problems arise in the process of living together. Usually it is a man, but nowadays there is both a shift in the headship in the family towards a woman, and the equality of spouses. It goes without saying that cultural traditions, as well as the personality traits of each spouse, play an important role in determining family positions. The formation of the structure, and consequently, the distribution of roles in the family, is seriously influenced by the changes taking place in the social microstructure. The distribution of responsibilities in the family is connected with the roles that the husband and wife have assumed.

After the creation of the family, the process of mutual adaptation to each other begins. And here the ability of people to compromise, show tolerance and restrain themselves in conflict situations is of great importance. Difficulties that arise in family life very often become the cause of a marriage crisis, and in some cases the help of a psychologist is desirable, but in most cases young people cope on their own.

The birth of a child is a significant event in the life of the spouses, indicating the entry of the family into a new period of development. This is another test for the spouses. They begin to fulfill new social roles - mother and father; entering a new social role is always difficult and requires preparation. In this case, this preparation is pregnancy. Future parents are gradually preparing themselves in thought and imagination for the change that is to take place in their lives; at the same time they are preparing their environment. They have to seriously change the established life. During pregnancy, the spouses begin to form attitudes towards the unborn child. Here factors such as the desire or undesirability of the child, as well as the desire of one of the parents to have a child of a certain gender, matter. All of this will have an impact on your upbringing.

The roles of parents are comprehensive and multifaceted. Parents are responsible for the child's choice of life position. The birth of a child and the need to provide him with conditions for development entail a certain reorganization of home life. But in addition to caring for children, the roles of parents also extend to the formation of the child's personality, the world of his thoughts, feelings, aspirations, to the education of his own "I". The harmonious development of the child's personality is associated not only with the presence and activity in the family of each of the parents, but also with the consistency of their educational actions. Differences in educational methods and interpersonal relationships of parents do not allow the child to understand and comprehend what is good and what is bad. In addition, when the consent between the parents is violated, when the people closest to the child, the people who are his support, are in a quarrel, and besides, he hears that this is happening for reasons that concern him, then he cannot feel confident and safe. . And hence the children's anxiety, fears and even neurotic symptoms. Relationships between family members are very important for a child. And it is especially important for him to understand how adults treat him.

The nature of the emotional attitude of parents to the child can be called the parental position. This is one of the most important factors that shape the personality of a child. There are several variations of this factor, from dominance to complete indifference. And the constant imposition of contacts, and their complete absence is harmful to the child. It is very important to establish contact with the child, so that later you can talk about the bestowal on the part of the child. First of all, the child must be approached without exaggerated concentration of attention, but also without excessive emotional distance, i.e. free contact is needed, and not tense or too weak and random. This is an approach that can be described as balanced, free, directed to the mind and heart of the child, focused on his real needs. This should be an approach based on a certain independence, moderately categorical and persistent, which is a support and authority for the child, and not an overbearing command order or a compliant, passive request. Disturbances in contact with the child manifest themselves in several characteristic forms, for example, excessive aggressiveness or the desire to correct the child's behavior.

From an early age, the correct development of the child is carried out primarily thanks to the care of the parents. A small child learns from his parents to think, speak, understand and control his reactions. Thanks to the personal models that his parents are for him, he learns how to relate to other family members, relatives, acquaintances: whom to love, whom to avoid, whom to more or less reckon with, whom to express his sympathy or antipathy, when to restrain his reactions. The family prepares the child for a future independent life in society, transfers to him spiritual values, moral norms, patterns of behavior, traditions, and culture of his society. The guiding, coordinated educational methods of the parents teach the child to be relaxed, at the same time he learns to control his actions and deeds in accordance with moral standards. The child develops a world of values. In this multifaceted development, parents, by their behavior and their own example, provide the child with great help. However, some parents can make it difficult, slow down, even disrupt the behavior of their children, contributing to the manifestation of pathological personality traits in him.

A child brought up in a family where parents are personal models for him receives training for subsequent social roles: woman or man, wife or husband, mother or father. In addition, social pressure is quite strong. Children are usually praised for their sex-appropriate behavior and blamed for acts of the opposite sex. Proper sexual education of the child, the formation of a sense of belonging to one's own sex constitute one of the foundations for the further development of their personality.

It goes without saying that children with inadequate self-esteem subsequently create problems for themselves and their loved ones. Therefore, from the very beginning, parents should try to form an adequate self-esteem in their child. Here we need a flexible system of punishment and praise. Admiration and praise are excluded in front of a child, gifts are rarely given for deeds, extremely harsh punishments are not used.

In addition to self-esteem, parents also set the level of the child's claims - what he claims in his activities and relationships. Children with a high level of aspirations, high self-esteem and prestigious motivation count only on success, and in case of failure, they can get severe mental trauma. Children with a low level of claims and low self-esteem do not apply for much either in the future or in the present. They do not set high goals for themselves and constantly doubt their abilities, quickly put up with failures, but at the same time they often achieve a lot.

Each family objectively develops a certain, far from always conscious system of education. Here we have in mind the understanding of the goals of education, and the methods of education, and the consideration of what can and cannot be allowed in relation to the child. 4 tactics of upbringing in the family can be distinguished and 4 types of family relations corresponding to them, which are the prerequisite and result of their occurrence: diktat, guardianship, “non-intervention” and cooperation.

Diktat in the family is manifested in the systematic suppression by parents of initiative and self-esteem in children. Of course, parents can and should make demands on their child, based on the goals of education, moral standards, specific situations in which it is necessary to make pedagogically and morally justified decisions. However, those who prefer order and violence to all types of influence face the resistance of the child, who responds to pressure, coercion, threats with hypocrisy, deceit, outbursts of rudeness, and sometimes outright hatred. But even if the resistance turns out to be broken, along with it there is a breakdown of many personality traits: independence, self-esteem, initiative, faith in oneself and one's capabilities, all this is a guarantee of unsuccessful personality formation.

guardianship in the family - a system of relations in which parents, providing their work to satisfy all the needs of the child, protect him from any worries, efforts and difficulties, taking them upon themselves. The question of the active formation of personality fades into the background. Parents, in fact, block the process of seriously preparing their children for reality beyond the threshold of their home. Such excessive concern for the child, excessive control over his entire life, based on close emotional contact, is called hyperprotection. It leads to passivity, dependence, difficulties in communication. There is also an opposite concept - hypo-custody, which implies a combination of an indifferent attitude of a parental attitude with a complete lack of control. Children can do whatever they want. As a result, when they grow up, they become selfish, cynical people who are not able to respect anyone, do not deserve respect themselves, but still demand the fulfillment of all their whims.

The system of interpersonal relations in the family, based on the recognition of the possibility and even expediency of the independent existence of adults from children, can be generated by tactics "non-intervention". This assumes that two worlds can coexist: adults and children, and neither one nor the other should cross the line thus outlined. Most often, this type of relationship is based on the passivity of parents as educators.

Cooperation as a type of relationships in the family, it implies the mediation of interpersonal relationships in the family by common goals and objectives of joint activities, its organization and high moral values. It is in this situation that the egoistic individualism of the child is overcome. The family, where the leading type of relationship is cooperation, acquires a special quality, becomes a group of a high level of development - a team.

Many parents with bated breath are waiting for the so-called transitional age in their children. For some, this transition from childhood to adulthood happens completely unnoticed, for someone it becomes a real disaster. Until recently, an obedient and calm child suddenly becomes "prickly", irritated, he now and then comes into conflict with others. This often causes an ill-conceived negative reaction from parents and teachers. Their mistake is that they are trying to subdue the teenager to their will, and this only hardens, pushes him away from adults and, worst of all, breaks the growing person, making him an insincere opportunist or still obedient until he loses his “I”. ". Adolescent independence is expressed mainly in the desire for emancipation from adults, liberation from their guardianship and control. Needing their parents, their love and care, their opinion, they have a strong desire to be independent, equal with them. How relations develop during this difficult period for both parties and after it depends mainly on the style of upbringing that has developed in the family, and the parents' ability to rebuild - to accept the feeling of adulthood of their child. There are 3 styles of parenting - authoritarian, democratic and permissive.

At authoritarian style, the desire of the parent is the law for the child. Such parents suppress their children. They demand unquestioning obedience from the teenager and do not consider it necessary to explain to him the reasons for their instructions and prohibitions. They tightly control all spheres of a teenager's life, and they do this not always correctly. Children in such families usually become isolated, their communication with their parents is disrupted. Some adolescents go into conflict, but more often children growing up in such a family adapt to the style of family relationships and become insecure, less independent.

Democratic the style of family relations is the most optimal for education. Democratic parents value both independence and discipline in the behavior of a teenager. They themselves grant him the right to be independent in some areas of his life; without prejudice to rights, at the same time demand the fulfillment of duties; they respect his opinion and consult with him. Control based on warm feelings and reasonable care usually does not annoy a teenager too much; he often listens to explanations why one should not do one thing and another should be done. The formation of adulthood under such circumstances occurs without any special experiences and conflicts.

At conniving style, parents almost do not pay attention to their children, do not restrict them in anything, do not prohibit anything. Teenagers from such families often fall under bad influence, they can raise a hand against their parents, they have almost no values.

No matter how smoothly the teenage period passes, conflicts cannot be avoided. Conflicts most often arise when parents treat a teenager as a small child, as well as any trifle - from the teenager's manner of dressing to the question of the hour until which he is allowed to be out of the house. In order to find a common language with a teenager, you need to try to perceive him as an equal partner, who simply has less life experience so far, be interested in his problems, delve into all the difficulties that arise in his life and help him. In this case, the teenager will definitely repay his parents with attention and care on his part.