Fears in children: causes and methods of overcoming. Children's fears: types, causes, ways to combat children's fears

Children's fears are a normal phenomenon, because this is how a child shows emotions, gets used to the world around him and socializes. Some psychologists believe that children are unfamiliar with this feeling, but as they grow up in preschool and school age, they are afraid of different things. The appearance of anxiety has its reasons. They need to be clarified, because over time, any fear can develop into a real phobia, which will remain in a person’s adult life. Correction of the baby’s behavior is carried out different ways, most of which are available to parents at home.

Many adults often wonder why children are not afraid of anything, because they can do something that makes a man or woman’s heart skip a beat and panic arise. This happens for one simple reason - babies do not develop the instinct of self-preservation as much as mom, dad and older children. However, as you get older, there is a big leap psycho-emotional development child, and it is at this stage that fears begin to form.

Fear is a powerful emotion human body, which is formed as a result of the work of the instinct of self-preservation.

The reasons for the appearance of fears can be different

Many psychologists and teachers study the formation of anxiety, feelings of danger and fear of something in children. They draw the attention of parents that these emotions in themselves are not a pathology, so they should not be considered delusional. This is a completely normal phenomenon, which is typical for many children due to their rich imagination. But adults must ensure that a small fear does not develop into a phobia. This condition is no longer the norm; it requires consultation with specialists and long-term correction.

Why does a child begin to be afraid: all the reasons for the appearance of fears

Some experts deny the possibility of logical judgments on the part of young children, explaining this by the fact that children take any information seriously. For example, the parents said: “Don’t touch the dog, it will bite you!” The son or daughter does not understand that the animal will not necessarily behave aggressively, it is possible, but it does not always happen. However, a stereotype has already formed in the mind of the baby: all dogs bite if you touch them, so you should be afraid of them, they are dangerous. And there are many such examples. The child cannot yet connect logical chains and learn that not all words of adults should be taken literally, this is just a warning.

In many cases, children are not afraid of anything in particular, but of punishment that may come from parents or other adults. That is why mom and dad should calmly explain to the baby why something cannot be done, and not immediately scold the child.

There are other factors in the emergence of children's fears:

• rich fantasy. Once he hears that there is something scary in a dark room, the baby immediately begins to be afraid. This applies to many phrases and conversations that the child perceives as truth. The same applies to what he sees: after watching a scary cartoon, a baby may get scared and think that this will happen to him in reality;
• action that happened to the child. Most often, certain events cause anxiety. For example, a cat scratched a baby, and after that he became afraid, because the animal could cause pain again;
  

  Not all children become afraid. Some people fall off their bike and immediately get back on it. The appearance of fear largely depends on character: shy, suspicious and withdrawn children are more likely to be afraid than others.

• tense family situation. Children are very emotional, they are able to repeat the mood of their parents and project it onto themselves. Therefore, quarrels, screams, scandals between adults negatively affect the psychological state of the baby. He becomes withdrawn, irritable, and constantly feels anxious about any reason. If the situation does not change, such feelings may eventually develop into fear;
• lack of friends. As the child grows older, he needs socialization. This process begins with relationships with other children, first on the playground, then in kindergarten and school. But if no one wants to be friends with the baby, they laugh at his attempts to join the team, he develops social phobia. Because of this, the baby is afraid to go play with the kids, and visiting educational institution turns into an endless stream of hysterics and nervous breakdowns;
• problems in the functioning of the nervous system. In some cases, the child develops a fear that is not justified. This is an abnormal condition, a pathology, so consultation with a psychologist is required. Only a specialist can diagnose the disease and make the correct diagnosis. Such fear develops against the background of neuroses, and psychocorrection will require the work of several specialists with the baby.

Fear of the dark is one of the most common fears in children.

What is childhood pathological fear syndrome?

Doctors also identify a condition called childhood pathological fear syndrome. It is characterized by fear various items, actions and phenomena and arises unreasonably, without any reason. The attack begins with crying, discontent and develops into severe hysteria and panic. It lasts a long time, in some cases children may experience inexplicable anxiety for days. This syndrome is considered a pathology, and psychologists associate it with mental disorders in the development of a child, which begin at an early age, but noticeably manifest themselves by the age of six or seven.

Video: psychologist on the emergence of childhood fears

Methods for diagnosing fears in children

Doctors consider the emergence of fear as a kind of protective function of the body, which can make itself felt at a certain age, and then goes away over time. Sometimes a short conversation is enough to explain what not to be afraid of, and children immediately forget about their problems. However, there are also pathological fears, manifested in the form of a state of horror and shock. They negatively affect the speed of development of the child. A specialist will help you understand whether your child’s anxiety is considered normal or not.

To understand the child’s condition, you need to diagnose his fears. This will help to find out the reason for the development of fear and then help the baby overcome anxiety. It is best to contact a child psychologist who will select a method for assessing the child’s behavior, develop a treatment program and give recommendations to parents on what to do in the future.

Experts point out that the formation of fear is a completely normal phenomenon. In this way, the child’s body undergoes adaptation to the world around him, because much is still unfamiliar and incomprehensible to him.

Child psychologists use different techniques to diagnose fear in children:

• conversation with a child. The specialist carefully thinks through the questions so as not to scare the baby even more. Important condition successful therapeutic intervention - a trusting atmosphere in which the baby feels protected and begins to reveal all his secrets;
  

  It is very difficult to diagnose children: they are afraid to talk about their anxiety. Therefore, one careless question or the wrong intonation in the voice can ruin the relationship with a specialist, the baby will withdraw into itself and will no longer make contact.

• drawing. The doctor may ask you to draw something on a specific or arbitrary topic. After the child finishes, the drawing is studied. The theme, the color scheme that was chosen, and the location and size of the figures on a sheet of paper are taken into account;
• fairy tales, questionnaires or tests. This method is more suitable for older preschool and younger children school age. An adult can ask you to come up with an ending to the story and answer some questions;
• modeling This method is used less often than others and is suitable for children who refuse to talk to a psychologist and do not like to draw pictures.

Most children's fears are easily corrected

Test to identify feelings of fear in boys and girls

Many psychologists have developed various tests that can be used to determine the presence of fear and the degree of its manifestation. The method of Alexander Zakharov and Marina Panfilova “Fears in houses” for children over three years of age is very popular.

1. An adult draws two houses on a blank white sheet: one in red, the other in black.
2. Then he invites the child to play a game: in the black house there are only terrible fears, but in the red house there are not terrible ones.
3. And he begins to list out loud to the baby, one by one, 29 types of different frightening objects and phenomena.
4. The child, in turn, answers in which of the houses he will place each name.
5. The specialist notes to himself only the fear that the baby will be placed in a black house.

This technique is suitable for children who do not answer the psychologist’s questions well and do not like to draw

All fears in this test can be divided into certain groups:

• medicine (pain during the procedure, instruments such as syringes, doctors);
• fear of death;
• phenomena and objects (loud sounds, car, thunder, water, etc.);
• animals (wild, domestic, microbes, insects);
• darkness and nightmares;
• fictional characters (cartoon or fairy tale characters);
• people (other children, strangers and own parents);
• actions (punishment, physical violence);
• space (fear of enclosed spaces, heights, depth).

Depending on the result obtained, doctors diagnose the baby’s condition and determine a course of action to teach the child how to cope with anxiety and fear.

Questionnaire for parents to determine the presence of children's fears, phobias and panic conditions

Besides various tests, fairy tales and other techniques, there are questionnaires that contain a certain number of questions. Based on the parents' answers, the psychologist assesses what the situation is and gives recommendations to mom and dad on how to behave in the current situation. The questionnaire below is suitable for children aged 4 to 10 years.

1. The child cannot do one thing for a long time, gets tired quickly and is often distracted.
2. Several times over a short time the mood changes: crying can suddenly turn into laughter and back.
3. The baby often gets upset and upset for any reason or without.
4. Any failure causes crying and hysterics, which can last for a long time.
5. A bad mood is a child’s constant companion.
6. Tasks cause anxiety and stress.
7. Anxiety is manifested by frequently repeated actions: thumb sucking, nail biting, constantly fiddling with something in the hands.
8. Cannot fall asleep on their own, wakes up several times during the night, cries or screams in their sleep.
9. Cannot react quickly in many situations.
10. He is afraid of strangers and does not like to play with other children.
11. He cannot make decisions on his own, he is not confident in his abilities.
12. He often changes his mind, it is difficult to come to an agreement with him, because in a minute, five or an hour, with hysterics, the baby will prove that he wants something completely different.
13. Before a new task or acquaintance, he experiences malaise, indigestion, pain in the head and discomfort in the abdominal area.
14. Observed increased sweating, especially before something new.
15. There are no favorite dishes or treats, the baby constantly has a poor appetite.

All questions can be answered by one of three options answers:

• yes - 2 points;
• sometimes - 1 point;
• no - 0 points.

Table: determination of anxiety level based on survey results

What are the types of childhood fears in preschoolers and schoolchildren?

All fears of a child can be divided into several types:

• real. They arise due to the instinct of self-preservation and help the baby avoid many dangerous situations. Of course, every person has such fears, but adults have learned to control them so as not to succumb to panic and emotional shock. The task of the parents in this case is to direct the child’s understanding in the right direction, try to understand the cause of the anxiety state and help remove it so that it does not subsequently develop into pathology;
  

  This type also includes obsessive fears. They arise as a consequence of certain incidents that happened to the child. For example, a baby almost drowned in the bathtub, so he became afraid of water, and bathing turns into hysterics. If you don’t help your baby in time, this problem can develop into aquaphobia, which only a psychologist can cope with.

• neurotic. The most dangerous fears that may be associated with a mental disorder. The problem is that it is very difficult to determine the cause of fear. Therefore, parents are recommended to contact a specialist who, using certain techniques, will assess the condition of the baby and will work to correct the situation;
• super valuable. They are most common among children. Almost all children at one time or another are afraid of the dark, negative characters in fairy tales or films, animals, loneliness, etc. The more a child is left alone with a problem, the more fear penetrates the consciousness and fills all the thoughts of the little person. It becomes an obsession that affects emotional condition crumbs in a negative way;
  

  Psychologists give this example: young children are inseparable from their mother. But as they get older, they should be willing to stay with another adult they know, like dad or grandma, for a while. In this case, the child behaves normally, as always. If an overvalued fear dominates in the baby’s mind, he begins to become hysterical, because his mother is not around. These are not just whims, there is already a certain attitude in the baby’s thoughts: being away from the person closest to you is dangerous, something bad can happen at any moment.

• nocturnal They only appear in dark time days, otherwise the child behaves completely normally. But as night approaches, the mood noticeably worsens, anxiety appears, the baby suddenly begins to cry, does not want to sleep alone or in complete darkness. In some cases, children can fall asleep on their own without any problems, but at night they cry in their sleep, scream, and call for help. In the morning, babies often don’t remember what they dreamed.

Children's fears cannot be ignored, so as not to aggravate the situation.

Sometimes mom and dad themselves are to blame for the development of fears in their offspring. When they are constantly in a state of anxiety, the baby takes on this behavior. The same applies to excessive guardianship of adults over a child. If there are too many prohibitions, limited choice, no opportunity for self-realization, then children withdraw into themselves and are afraid of doing something wrong. Therefore, experts strongly advise parents to monitor their behavior towards the baby.

Video: different fears of kids and ways to overcome them

Manifestation of fears between the ages of one and 11 years

Features of the manifestation of fear vary depending on the age of the child. As you grow older, fears may change: some pass, while others appear. And this state of affairs is considered absolutely normal, because this is how the baby prepares for independence and life in society.

Table: age-related features of the appearance of childhood fears

Pedagogical methods for correcting children's fears

Psychologists approach the correction of children's fears gradually: first, a diagnosis is carried out, and only then a professional develops a strategy and action plan, and determines a method by which it will be possible to overcome fear in children. Modern psychology offers many different methods that are used simultaneously, separately from each other or sequentially.

It should be noted that the method chosen by the psychologist should be liked by the child. If the baby is capricious, starts crying or refuses to complete tasks, you need to choose another method. Forcing or scolding a baby is strictly prohibited.

Art therapy in overcoming problems

Art therapy is very common because children love to draw. Its essence lies in depicting the child’s fear. The psychologist invites the child to reproduce on paper what he fears most, and then, together with the author, analyzes the resulting picture. For example, a monster can be locked away forever by placing it in a cage from which it cannot escape. In many cases perfect solution- supplementing the drawing with funny elements, then the baby visually understands that there is nothing to be afraid of.

Parents can be close to the child, but do not help him draw the object of anxiety. Also, adults should not decide what to do with the drawing: if the baby wants to tear it, let him do so, but do not insist and force the baby to get rid of the image.

Art therapy is considered the most popular method of correcting children's fears

Play therapy to achieve psychological comfort

This is a great way to help your child write a positive scenario for the development of events. IN game form Together with the psychologist, the child talks about his fears. The specialist asks leading questions, carefully leading the conversation to positive points. For example, the monster is sitting in the closet. One can imagine that the monster himself is afraid of the dark and cries, wanting to see his mother. Now he's not so scary.

Many guys reveal real talents by getting used to the role and overcoming shyness. At the end of therapy, the psychologist may advise enrolling the child in a theater studio.

Fairy tale therapy: the role of fairy tales in individual psychocorrection

Children love fairy tales, because in them good always triumphs over evil. In order to help your child overcome fear, you need to choose stories that will not only interest the child, but also help you feel like the bravest and strongest person, capable of helping friends and parents. You can make up your own story and discuss it with your little one.

Today, adults can order a special book of fairy tales in which the main character will be a son or daughter. A photo of the baby is printed on the pages of this publication.

Fairy tales with a photo of a child will help your child overcome his fears

Talking about objects of fear with school-age children

A conversation about the object of fear is suitable for children of primary school age. They already know how to clearly formulate their thoughts and understand that hysterics and panic do not bring pleasure and are very exhausting, they simply cannot do anything about their condition on their own. The specialist conducts the dialogue in a cozy atmosphere, does not frighten the child, but provides freedom of choice: does not force him to tell everything at once. Leading questions, clear explanations and arguments from a psychologist will help a boy or girl understand their fear and deal with it.

Confidential conversation with a psychologist - good way overcome fear among schoolchildren

Correcting children's fears using affirmation

Affirmation is a special way by which a certain image is established in the child’s consciousness. This effect can be achieved using a phrase that the psychologist repeats many times when working with the baby. For example, if a baby often hears that a cat is good, over time he will believe it and stop being afraid of it.

Affirmation is a must short phrase, which consists of one or two sentences without complication. The child should hear only understandable words and phrases.

Sand painting technique

Today, working with sand is gaining immense popularity. Even children who do not like or do not yet know how to draw will enjoy this activity. This type of creativity not only develops fine motor skills, but also helps relieve tension, the baby relaxes, so the specialist works more deeply on the baby’s fears.

While working with sand, the baby calms down and trains his memory

Music and dance therapy in the work of psychologists

The essence of the technique is to select special melodies that have a calming effect and have a relaxing effect on nervous system the child and set up contact with a specialist. This type therapy is often combined with others: the baby can listen to music and draw at the same time. But not all children like to dance, so the master of his craft carefully studies whether this method is suitable for removing fear.

Meditation as a way to overcome fear

Not all child psychologists use this method. In order to practice meditation with a child, a specialist must have certain knowledge and skills. The essence of the method is to perform a series of psychological exercises, which allow you to penetrate deeper into yourself, understand the cause of your fears and overcome them at the level of thinking.

Meditation is not suitable for children, because they will not understand the principle of its action. It is most effective to work with schoolchildren.

If a child shows signs of psychosis, panic and neuroses, meditation may not be suitable as a way to correct fears. The fact is that to complete the exercises you need to fully concentrate, but not all children can do this.

Psychotherapy to combat childhood fears: expert advice

Classes with a psychotherapist include joint work not only with the child, but also training with parents. Depending on the degree of manifestation of fear ( initial stage or phobia), the doctor selects a correction method and begins work. Psychotherapy is a system of influencing the child’s psyche in order to relieve him of the feeling of fear, anxiety and neuroses.

Psychotherapists note that parents need to change their behavior and listen to a number of tips:

• mom and dad should show their love for the baby, surround him with care and show understanding;
• You shouldn’t brush your child off: daily parental attention and spending time together is the key to the harmonious psychological development of the baby;
• Children cannot be prohibited from communicating with their peers; they need to adapt socially;
• the baby needs games that should be present in the baby’s life every day;
• You should never scare children: every phrase of adults is taken literally by the child.

Video: how to get rid of fear

The benefits of children's fears

The psycho-emotional development of a child involves the formation of various fears as a manifestation of the instinct of self-preservation. If the baby does not understand what is possible and what is not, he will become helpless in front of the actions of other people or various phenomena. Therefore, the appearance of fear is normal condition, but if the baby is not afraid of anything, then it’s worth thinking about.

As soon as the body recognizes a critical situation, a dose of adrenaline enters the blood. As a result, the brain begins to think faster and more clearly, which facilitates decision-making. If the child did not experience fear, it would not have been possible to achieve such a state.

Social adaptation of children is also impossible without fear and fear. A child’s emotions directly depend on the perception of peers: the child wants to meet other children and make new friends. Many boys and girls are afraid of losing a friend or girlfriend, so they try to analyze situations, make decisions on their own and prepare to live in a world where their mother will not be around all the time.

Literary works, articles and books

To better understand the nature of children's fears, parents can study the literature of psychologists and doctors, which details the causes and ways to solve various situations.

1. Sigmund Freud, Psychoanalysis of Childhood Fears. In his book, the author describes the joint work of the boy's father with a specialist to achieve the best results, starting with determining the cause of fear and considering action patterns in a particular case.
2. G. Eberlein, “Fears of healthy children.” A medical doctor from Austria describes in his work various shapes and types of fears that, without correction, lead to neuroses, as well as sleep and speech disorders. The author tells parents what methods can be used to combat fear, as well as prevent its occurrence.
The book by Russian psychologist Alexander Zakharov talks about the fears that a child may dream at night. Sigmund Freud analyzes children's fears, gives their description and suggests ways to get rid of them.
Article by Yulia Kochetova, published in the electronic magazine “ Psychological Science and education,” reveals the issues of correcting children’s fears. In her book, Olga Nikolskaya tells how to cure fears in autistic people


The emergence of fears in childhood - common occurrence. But adults should not miss the moment when a small fear begins to gradually develop into pathological condition. IN preschool institutions Psychologists work with children in schools and conduct diagnostic tests several times a year. If there are deviations in the baby’s development, the specialist will definitely inform the parents and give some advice. Moms and dads are obliged to listen to these recommendations so as not to aggravate the situation and help the baby overcome his problems.

If you have any difficulties or problems, you can contact a certified specialist who will definitely help!

The methodological manual has been prepared for parents of preschool children, as well as parents of children of primary school age. It addresses issues related to the causes of children's fears and ways to overcome them.

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MINISTRY OF EDUCATION OF THE SARATOV REGION

TOOLKIT

“CHILDREN’S FEARS AND WAYS TO OVERCOME THEM”

educational psychologist, Municipal Educational Institution “Gymnasium No. 58”

Saratov, st. Ponomareva, 11/11, kV. 36,

tel. 893724441310

e-mail: [email protected]

The methodological manual has been prepared for parents of preschool children, as well as parents of children of primary school age. It addresses issues related to the causes of children's fears and ways to overcome them.

Reviewer: candidatepedagogical sciences O.S. Ezhevatova

The methodological manual was prepared by educational psychologist E.V. Sokovnina.

Introduction……………………………………………………………… page 4

Children's fears and the reasons for their appearance…………………p. 5

Manifestation of fears. Their varieties………………….. page 7

Dependence of the nature of children’s fears on the child’s age………………………………………………………. page 9

How to help a child overcome fears? Advice for parents…………………………………………………………….. page 11

Conclusion……………………………………………………………… page 15

References………………………………………………………... page 16

Introduction

Do you know that a monster lives under the bed, a skeleton is hiding in the closet, and the evil Baba Yaga is trying to kidnap an unwary child? No? Then ask your children - they will tell you something different.

Fears are a normal phenomenon for the child’s psyche, the other side of the instinct of self-preservation. Many of them pass over time and only cause a smile in adulthood.

There is even a concept of age-related fears - typical for a certain stage of development and reflecting children’s knowledge of the world around them. By their presence one can judge the correspondence of mental and mental development a child of his age.

But there are also those that interfere with the child’s normal activities, his adaptation in the team and leave an imprint on the whole later life. We will tell you how to deal with them in this manual.

Children's fears and the reasons for their appearance

Each of us has directly or indirectly encountered manifestations of childhood fears, be it the fear of the dark or the fear of people in white coats, the fear of loneliness or something unknown, and therefore certainly scary. As a rule, the reaction of adults to children's fears varies greatly. Some parents begin to panic and immediately begin to give their child sedatives. Others simply do not pay any attention to the child’s experiences, believing that over time it will go away on its own, while others begin to scold and even punish the child, believing that the child invented all the fears in order to receive certain relaxations in discipline and additional privileges. Upon entering school, the number of children's fears may increase, since during the period of adaptation to new conditions the child's general level of anxiety increases. At this moment, it is very important to pay attention to this in time and take a number of measures to prevent the occurrence of children's fears.

Childhood fears - a very common problem in raising a child. The manifestations of children's fears are very diverse. Some children are characterized by nightmares when the child wakes up crying and calls his mother, demanding that adults sleep with him. Others refuse to be alone in the room, are afraid of the dark, and are afraid to go out onto the stairs without their parents. Sometimes there are fears for parents, children are worried that something will happen to their mom or dad. Someone refuses to ride a slide, overcome obstacles, swim in a pool, someone runs away from an approaching dog, is not left alone, does not go to the doctor...

The reasons for children's fears are also varied. Their appearance directly depends on the child’s life experience, the degree of development of independence, imagination, emotional sensitivity, tendency to worry, anxiety, timidity, uncertainty. Most often, fears are generated by pain, the instinct of self-preservation. Most of them are due to age-related developmental characteristics and are temporary. Children's fears, if we treat them correctly and understand the reasons for their appearance, most often disappear without a trace.

However, along with such fears, there are others - persistent neurotic fears. These are fears that neither a child nor an adult can cope with. They serve as a signal of trouble, speak about the child’s nervous and physical weakness, the parents’ improper behavior, their ignorance of psychological and age-related characteristics, the presence of fears and conflictual relationships in the family. They are painfully pointed or persist long time, distorting the child’s personality, negatively affecting the development of his emotional-volitional sphere and thinking. This is the case when a child needs professional help psychologist.

There are several reasons for fear.

The first and most obvious reason isspecific casewho scared a child (bitten by a dog, stuck in an elevator). Such fears are the easiest to correct. But not all children bitten by a dog develop persistent fear that is noticeable to others. This largely depends on the child’s character traits (anxiety, suspiciousness, pessimism, lack of self-confidence, dependence on other people, etc.). And these character traits can arise if the parents themselves intimidate the baby: “If you don’t sleep, Baba Yaga will take you away!”

The most common areinstilled fears. Their source is adults (parents, grandmothers, teachers), who involuntarily, sometimes too emotionally, warn the child about danger, often without even paying attention to what frightened him more: the situation itself or the adult’s reaction to it. As a result, the child perceives only the second part of the phrases: “Don’t walk, you’ll fall,” “Don’t take it, you’ll get burned.” It is not yet clear to the child what this threatens him with, but he already feels anxiety, and it is natural that he has a fear reaction, which can take hold and spread to the original situations. Such fears can be fixed for life.

Another of the most common causes of fear ischildren's fantasy. The child often comes up with his own fear. Many of us as children were afraid of the dark, where monsters and ghosts came to life before our eyes, and monsters pounced on us from every corner. But each child reacts differently to such fantasies. Someone will immediately forget them and calm down. And for some it can lead to irreparable consequences.

The feeling of fear can be formed due tointra-family conflicts. Very often, a child feels guilty for parental conflicts or is afraid of being the cause of them.

Often the cause of fear isrelationships with peers. If children's group does not accept the child, he is offended, then the baby does not want to go to kindergarten or school, it is likely that he is afraid of being humiliated. It may also be due to the spread of fears among children. For example, more strong child can intimidate the baby with different stories.

I would like to note another important reason that influences the manifestation of fears - thismiseducationand destructive attitude towards the child. As a psychologist, I observe this in my practice almost every day. Lack of attention and, conversely, overprotection can become the basis for the emergence of fears in children. From my own observations, I can say that “family idols” have a much higher degree of anxiety, and therefore the number of fears, than children who lack parental attention.

The last reason is the presence of a more serious disorder - neurosis which must be diagnosed and treated medical workers. A manifestation of neurosis can be considered those fears that are not the norm for a child’s given age, or a very strong manifestation of fears that are included in the concept of the norm.

Pathological fear is indicated by its extreme, dramatic aspects of expression (horror, emotional shock, upheaval) or a protracted obsessive, difficult-to-reverse course, involuntariness, that is, a complete lack of control on the part of

Manifestations of fears. Their varieties

Sometimes children's expressions of fear are so obvious that they are not conveyed in comments, for example, horror, numbness, confusion, crying, etc. Other fears can be judged only by a number of indirect signs: the desire to avoid certain places, conversations and books on a certain topic, embarrassment and shyness.

The common thread between fear and anxiety is the feeling of restlessness. In a state of restlessness with a predominance of anxiety, motor agitation, inconsistency in actions, often excessive curiosity and the desire to occupy oneself with any, even unnecessary, activity are noted. Characterized by intolerance to waiting, which is expressed by haste and impatience. The pace of speech is accelerated, sometimes in the form of a difficult to control stream of words. In older children and teenagers, verbosity, excessive thoroughness in explanations, continuous sounds are typical, which creates the appearance of being busy, a feeling of uselessness, which in some cases eliminates the fear of loneliness.

For a state of anxiety with a predominance of fear, the following are typical: slowness, stiffness and “treading in one place.” Speech is inexpressive, thinking is viscous, the mood is sometimes gloomy and depressed.

In a state of chronic anxiety and fear, a person is in tense anticipation, easily frightened, rarely smiles, and is always serious and preoccupied. He gets excessively tired and is characterized by incoming headaches and spasms in various parts of the body. Restless sleep, frequent sleep talking, noisy breathing. Constantly haunted by nightmares. Communication is selective, contacts with strangers are difficult.

The most common manifestations of fears are those that are directly related to the situation in which this fear arose. For example, the grandmother of a 3-year-old child came to me because she was afraid of a fire in the house. Everything connected with fire terrified the boy. It got to the point that the parents had to change the stove with gas burners to an electric stove. As soon as the child heard the sound fire truck, he started crying a lot. Nobody could figure out where it came from?! From a conversation with the boy, it turned out that one day, when he was walking with his grandmother, there was a fire somewhere nearby and the grandmother’s curiosity later became the reason for the manifestation of fears in the child. In my practice, there have been many cases when children were afraid to raise their hands in class, knowing the material, for fear of saying something wrong. Naturally, then they were asked at the most inopportune moment, and then fear simply paralyzed the child. And this happened time after time, and as a result of this, academic performance fell. I had to work with a girl who was terribly afraid of turning down her friends and girlfriends for fear of losing their respect for her. As a result, the girl’s condition developed into deep depression, since the children very quickly learned to take advantage of her weakness. There are a lot of such examples and they all have different reasons, but the result is the same - the fear that lives nearby manifests itself in different ways and affects life in different ways. The more parents know about the reasons that led to fear and its manifestations, the faster and easier it is to get rid of it.

Psychologists have conventionally divided fears into 3 types; this division is based on the subject of fear, the characteristics of its course, duration, strength and causes of occurrence.

So, obsessive fears– the child experiences these fears in certain, specific situations; he is afraid of the circumstances that may entail them. Such fears include, for example, fear of heights, closed and open spaces, etc.

Delusional fears – the most severe form of fear, the cause of which cannot be found. For example, why is a child afraid to play with some toy or does not want to put on some clothes. Their presence often indicates serious deviations in the baby's psyche. However, do not rush to make any diagnosis. Perhaps the reason will be quite logical. For example, he is afraid to put on certain shoes because he once slipped and fell in them, hitting himself painfully, and now he is afraid of a repeat of the situation.

Overvalued fears- the most common type. They are associated with fixed ideas and caused by the child’s own imagination. In 90% of cases, practicing psychologists encounter precisely them. At first these fears correspond to some life situation, and then they become so significant that the child cannot think about anything else.

Children's overvalued fear includes the fear of the dark, in which the child's imagination places terrible witches, werewolves and ghosts, fairy-tale characters, as well as the fear of getting lost, attack, water, fire, pain and sharp sounds.

Dependence of the nature of children's fears on the child's age

No matter how strange it may seem, children in the first year of life are also susceptible to childhood fears:

Fear of a new environment. Surely, any mother has noticed how the baby changes as soon as he finds himself in an unfamiliar environment.

Fear of losing mom. This fear is so common that it simply makes no sense to describe it. However, unfortunately, very often such fear is mistaken for spoiling.

Fear of strangers.

However, in most cases, the fears of such babies are absolutely natural and, as the child grows up, they disappear without a trace.

At the age of one to three years, new childhood fears appear, the unwitting culprits of which are the parents of the baby:

Children's fear of the dark is the most common. Very often, parents themselves provoke such fears by scaring the child with the “babaika” and other mythical characters.

Fear of being alone for even one minute. As a rule, this fear arises precisely because the parents considered the needs of the baby in the first year of life to be ordinary spoiling and the baby was deprived of constant close contact with his mother.

Night terrors. In most cases they are an extension of the fear of the dark. Remember that watching some modern cartoons can significantly aggravate the situation.

For age category three to five years old, the most typical fears are:

Panic fear of loneliness.

Children's fears of the dark.

Also at this age, some parents are surprised to notice that their baby has developed a fear of enclosed spaces, for example, the child may suddenly begin to refuse to enter the elevator or begin to demand to leave open door to the bedroom. Psychocorrection of such childhood fear is mandatory, otherwise this fear may emerge in adulthood, turning into claustrophobia.

Children's night terror at this age they are evoked by fairy-tale characters, so a child at this age identifies them with very real people.

At the age of 5–7 years, the syndromes of children's pathological fears become much more diverse. The child’s horizons expand, and with it new fears may appear in the child’s life.

I am acquiring night terrors in 7 year old children new uniform– the child begins to be afraid to fall asleep, because in his dreams he sees scary dreams. And this is a very serious load on the child’s nervous system, so correction of night fears for 7 years is simply mandatory.

There is a fear of punishment. As already mentioned, this is a very alarming signal that all is not well with the relationship between parents and children. Psychocorrection of children's fears of punishment should begin with changing the approach of parents to the process of raising a child. It has long been recognized that physical influence on a child brings nothing but harm.

Under the influence of conversations between adults and watching TV shows, a child may develop an insurmountable fear of animals, most often dogs. By the way, adults often increase this fear by overprotecting the child.

At this age, a child is faced with such a sad phenomenon human life like death. However, the child cannot yet fully understand this, and therefore the baby appears children's fear before his own death, the death of his parents.

In addition, children's fear of death, as a consequence, entails the emergence of fear of all kinds of fires, natural disasters, road accidents, etc.

Children between the ages of 7 and 11 develop new fears associated with a new stage in their lives.

Fear of school.

Team fear caused by difficult adaptation.

Fears of getting a bad grade.

The age of children from 11 to 16 years is the most difficult period in the development of the psyche. Therefore, parents should treat manifestations of fears in adolescents with respect. special attention and understanding

Fear of not being yourself (physiological and physical changes: dissatisfaction with them)

Fear associated with the instinct of self-preservation (death of parents, oneself, fear of war, fear of attack, illness, fear of closed spaces, etc.)

Knowing all this, parents should treat their child with understanding and participation at any age.

How to help a child overcome fears?

Tips for parents

Children's fears and ways to correct them in preschool and school-age children have long been the object of close study by psychologists around the world. At this time, several basic methods are used to identify children's fears and correct them, which are described below.

Let's draw fears. Drawing is in a great way how you can get rid of childhood fear. For drawing, it is best to use sheets of whatman paper and paint. Ask your child to draw something that scares him. Draw with him, depict your version of events. After the drawing is completed, ask your child to describe the drawing. Be sure to ask your child clarifying questions. If your child draws a wolf, ask him whether it is a boy or a girl. If the picture shows a fire, ask the child to name the cause of it. Actively maintain the conversation and praise the child.

After this, tell your baby in a language he understands why his fears are in vain; if necessary, support your words with drawings. After you are sure that the child understands you, you can arrange a “ritual burning” of negative drawings. However, do not forget about fire safety rules - the bathroom is ideal for these purposes.

Keep in mind that one such session is not enough to rid a child of fear. It is possible that you will need at least two weeks to achieve success. Such sessions should be held regularly, since overcoming children's fear is possible only with systematic training.

As a rule, such drawings help to overcome fears that arise as a result of the play of a rich child’s imagination, that is, those imagined by him, and not those that occurred in reality. A little less often, drawing helps free a child from fears that were caused by some real event, for example, a dog bite or a fall from a height. However, such a remedy should not be used if very little time has passed since the incident - this will significantly aggravate the situation.

In order to rid the child of fears associated with problems of social adaptation, fear parental punishment, confined space, psychologists advise using subject-based role-playing games.

"Tag". The point of the game is this: you must designate the playing area on which the players are located. The presenter must catch up with the participants. The one who is caught up becomes the leader. The atmosphere during the game should be as friendly and fun as possible. Be sure to take part in the game yourself, periodically giving in to your child.

This game helps the child get rid of the fear of punishment. In addition, it perfectly helps restore lost trust relationships between parents and children.

The well-known and favorite game of “hide and seek” since childhood is also an excellent remedy to overcome the child’s fear of the dark, confined spaces and feelings of loneliness. For best results, let your child lead. Discuss in advance those places where you cannot hide, then turn off the overhead lights, leaving only a night light or a working TV.

As for older children and adolescents, the main point in overcoming fears and painful emotional experiences is a confidential conversation. Tell your child about your fears and experiences at this age, discuss his problems, share your experience as you yourself or someone you know has gone through similar situation and managed to overcome fear.

It is important to offer help to your child when he asks for it and to set a goal for him when he is mentally ready to accept it and follow it.

However, remember that if a child shows signs of fear, or refuses to play altogether, do not force him under any circumstances, so as not to aggravate the problem even further.

In the same case, if you are unable to cope with childhood fears on your own, and you do not know how to deal with their consequences, you can always seek help from a child psychologist who will tell you how to get rid of childhood fears. As a rule, the problem can be eliminated in any, even the most severe and advanced case, but it is advisable not to waste time so as not to traumatize the child’s psyche.

And now it's time to give a few extreme useful recommendations parents. After all, it has been scientifically proven that in 95% of all cases of children's fears, parents are directly or indirectly involved in this.

Taking care of a child’s psychological health must begin even before birth. Child psychologists note an interesting pattern - the calmer the pregnancy was, the less often children subsequently develop any childhood fears. So try, no matter how trivial it may sound, to be less nervous during pregnancy.

Recommendation for mom: no matter what high position you hold at work, remember that the child is not your subordinate, he does not need a strict leader, but a gentle and loving mother. It has been noticed that in children of domineering, strict mothers, childhood fears occur much more often, and in a more severe form. Treatment of childhood fears is very complex and often requires the use of pharmacological drugs.

Under no circumstances should a child be allowed to feel abandoned and unwanted. Even if you spend almost all your time at work, or you were born youngest child, or for some other reason you have no strength left, you must overcome yourself and pay attention to the child. In the absence of adequate treatment of children's fears caused by a feeling of their own “uselessness”, adolescence this problem can lead to suicidal tendencies in the child.

However, it is also not worth instilling in your child a sense of personal exclusivity. Egoistic thinking also often leads to the fear of losing one’s exclusive position, which has the nature of an obsession.

Try not to limit your child’s communication with peers - this will lead to fears about school life.

Never compare your child with other children. Under no circumstances should you cite as an example to your child the successes that his peers have achieved. This will most likely lead to a decrease in the child’s self-esteem.

Under no circumstances should you frighten your child with dogs, doctors or police officers.The child takes such threats very seriously.

Speaking about how to overcome children's fears, I would like to note the pleasant fact that, fortunately, almost all children's fears are temporary and can be easily corrected. However, this requires that parents take this issue seriously. And a few more wishes.

You should not engage in “hardening”, i.e. if a child is afraid of the dark and sleeps alone, do not lock him in the room “to get used to it.” You will scare the child even more, but this is the least that can happen. The consequences of such “hardening” are sad: neuroses, stuttering, developmental disabilities.

Do not treat children’s fears as whims, especially since you should not scold and punish children for “cowardice.”

Do not belittle the importance of fear for the child himself, do not ignore his complaints. It is important to make your child feel that you understand him well: explaining to a child that “monsters” do not exist is usually impossible.

Constantly reassure your child that he is completely safe, especially when you, the parent, are next to him. The child must trust you.

Discuss his fears with your child. The main task of parents is to understand what exactly is bothering him and what caused the fear.

Try to distract your child. For example, when he starts to panic, keep him busy playing or watching something. Talk to your child more!

Support your child, but don't be led. For example, if a child is afraid of fire, you can not turn on the gas stove in his presence; such indulgence will calm the baby, but will not relieve him of fear.

Conclusion

From all of the above, we conclude that the changes occurring with the child require a restructuring of the relationship between the adult and the child, and changes in the parents themselves. Therefore, dear parents, please help your child! Make his life bright, interesting, eventful, teach him to rejoice and be surprised and rejoice with him, appreciate every moment of life.

Remember that dealing with fear can take anywhere from a couple of minutes to several weeks or even months. Whatever method you choose on your own or together with a psychologist, the success of overcoming childhood fear primarily depends on how sincerely and kindly you extended a helping hand to your child and your willingness to change yourself in order to help the child.

We firmly believe that a person who grows up in an atmosphere of love and respect, surrounded by cheerful, flexible and sensitive parents, is the least susceptible to fear, self-confident, loved by others and capable of much in this life.

Bibliography:

Zakharov A.I. “How to prevent deviations in a child’s behavior” - M., “Prosveshcheniye”, 1993.

Zakharov A.I. “Day and night fears in children” - Soyuz Publishing House, St. Petersburg, 2000.

Allan Fromm “The ABC for parents or how to help a child with difficult situation", Thomas Gordon "R.E.T. Increasing parental effectiveness." – Ekaterinburg: Publishing house ARD LTD., 1997.

Alla Spivakovskaya “Psychotherapy: play, childhood, family” / Volume 2 – April Press LLC, ZAO Publishing House EKSMO – Press, 2000.

Prikhozhan A.M. “Anxiety in children and adolescents: Psychological nature and age dynamics” - Moscow-Voronezh, 2000.

Markovskaya I.M. “Training of interaction between parents and children” - St. Petersburg: Publishing House “Rech”, 2000.

The child grows, develops, learns the world and reacts to it in accordance with its genetic predisposition, personal experience, characteristics of character, upbringing and behavior of parents. Fear is a natural human reaction to objects that pose a real or perceived threat. Children's fear usually differs from adults in its short duration.

Among the factors influencing the occurrence of fears in a child, one can highlight gender, because according to statistics, girls are more susceptible to fears than boys. The number of children in the family also affects - one child due to high emotional attachment towards parents, experiences more fears than the owner of brothers and sisters. Childhood neurosis may also be the cause. Any family conflicts contribute to the emergence of neuroses in children, because the child is inclined to blame himself for everything that happens. We can say that this is a signal that there are problems in adult relationships.

What other reasons can provoke fear?

Kinds

Children's fears can be divided into biological (natural) and social. The first to appear, of course, are natural fears, which are based on the instinct of self-preservation. These include fear of the dark, sharp sounds, monsters, and animals. Over time, fears of one's own and parent's death are added, as well as fear of thunderstorms, water, fire, heights and confined spaces. After meeting people in white coats, a fear of doctors, injections, blood, and dentistry may arise. Biological fears are usually characteristic of children under 8 years of age.

Social fears begin to appear a little later. Older preschoolers and first-graders begin to experience the fear of being late, loneliness, punishment, displeasure from parents and significant adults.

There is another classification of fears, which involves division depending on the frightening object or situation, the reasons for its occurrence, and the specifics of its course.

• supervaluable ones are natural fears fueled by the child’s imagination. This group is the most popular and extensive;
• childhood phobias - this includes fears of heights, water, closed spaces - those fears that can also exist in adulthood;
• delusional fears - these include fears that are inexplicable from the standpoint of the norm. Very often, phobias can be provoked by some erroneous stimulus, that is, for example, a child suffered a misfortune when he was visiting certain person. IN unconscious baby the connection has been established and the next time this person appears, he may be afraid.

Developmental psychology specializes in the characteristics of each period of human development. Fears are an important component; each age has its own characteristic objects, alarming and anxiety in a person.

0 – 1 year – loud sounds, noise, absence of mother, strangers, changing clothes;

1 – 3 years – night terrors, nightmares, unusual location of familiar objects, change of environment, separation from parents;

3-5 years – height, water, darkness, animals;

5 – 7 years – death of parents and one’s own, loneliness, characters from fairy tales;

7 – 9 years – disapproval of adults and peers, punishment, tardiness;

9 – 12 years old – inconsistency with classmates and friends, academic failure, own appearance.

When diagnosing children's fears, it is also expected to be divided into three groups, depending on the degree of severity: low, medium ( age norm) and high. According to statistics, more than half of eight-year-old children demonstrate a high level of fear. The least number of children have a low degree of severity of fears.

Features of manifestation

The manifestations are very different. IN mild form this may be a rapid pulse, dilated pupils, trembling and other somatic symptoms. Depending on the age, fear can be expressed by screaming, crying, complaining and outright horror and panic. The peculiarity of children's fears is that they arise in periods and usually last no more than a month. However, there are fears that can stay with a person until adulthood and develop into full-fledged phobias. These include acrophobia, hydrophobia, thanatophobia and others.

Various manifestations of fear in a child are possible. For example, the fear of nightmares is detected at the moment of going to bed; the baby will ask to go to bed with his parents or categorically refuse to fall asleep alone. The fear of a fairy-tale monster, generated by children's imagination, provokes the child to hide in a closet or other secluded places. At the age of 6, the fear of death is felt most acutely; it is the basis for most manifestations of fear:

• monsters;
• animals;
• darkness;
• attacks;
• illness;
• natural elements.

Schoolchildren have new fears associated with educational activities. Trembling before being judged by adults, fear of being late for class, fear of not being yourself. Some children, even those who study normally and do not have any special behavior problems, Parent meeting also causes excitement. Fear of punishment is often experienced by those who have never been subjected to physical force.

The child’s psyche is formed under the influence of the environment in which he lives. Often parents themselves unwittingly become a catalyst in the development of children's fear. Under no circumstances should you discount your child’s complaints, try to shame them or assure them that there is nothing wrong. Helping a child overcome fears is possible only with attentive behavior, understanding and love. Even ask in detail small child about what worries him. Delve into and approach the problem consciously.

Don't forget that your own increased anxiety will definitely affect your children's behavior.

How to deal with childhood fears

You can overcome childhood fear with the help of a professional psychologist. There are many methods used by specialists when working with children of a certain age. Starting from the age of 4, the client psychologist uses fairy tale therapy and art therapy to work with phobias. Psychocorrection occurs quite quickly, with proper support from parents.

Fairy tale therapy

Fears in preschool age are effectively eliminated using this technique. Let us examine in detail the stages of working with therapeutic fairy tale using the example of a 5-year-old boy who was afraid of injections.

1. From the toys available in the office, the child was asked to choose the one that appealed to him the most. He chose Spider-Man.
2. A psychologist invites a young client to listen to a fairy tale about Spider-Man. A fairy tale has a certain structure that appeals to the child. Her main character has mass positive qualities, and only one small problem - he is afraid of injections. The therapist points out that this fear is a completely natural phenomenon.
3. After this, the psychologist falls silent and invites the boy to express his assumptions about what exactly frightens Spider-Man.
4. After listening to all the client’s reasoning, the therapist invites him to choose from the remaining toys another hero who will help Spider-Man. The boy chose Cheburashka.
5. Both toys are placed side by side, and the psychologist asks the client to figure out how Cheburashka will help Spider-Man overcome his fear of injections.
6. The kid tells his version of the happy ending of the fairy tale. After this, the psychologist is interested in the client’s feelings. Then he offers to find him the positive traits that he and Cheburashka have. The “magic” words of Cheburashka, which helped Spider-Man overcome his fear of injections, stand out separately.

Art therapy

Art therapy helps a lot in getting rid of childhood fears. This direction in psychotherapy is based on healing through art, in its various manifestations. Most often it means fine arts However, there are methods of music therapy and dance therapy. In working with phobias in children, art therapy has a very high performance. Let's consider the standard sequence of actions of a consultant psychologist during a session with a child.

1. Establishing contact with the child, building trusting relationships.
2. An invitation to portray your fear. This can be a drawing or modeling.
3. Analysis of the result. The psychologist carefully evaluates all aspects of the drawing: what is depicted, where exactly, what size, whether the child himself is depicted, with what pressure the lines were drawn.
4. The child is asked to fall in love with the object he has depicted. For example, a drawn or sculpted dog is not actually angry, but simply barked at a child out of duty.
5. The baby begins to rethink his attitude, perhaps even to sympathize with the object of fear.
6. Finally, the child is asked about the emotions he is experiencing.

Drawing fear works effectively when the object is generated by fantasy or events that happened a long time ago. Sometimes working with a drawing happens differently: the client is asked to add something, for example, to cross out (shade in) a frightening image, or to destroy the entire sheet (tear it into small pieces, burn it). After the symbolic ritual, the psychologist draws the child’s attention to the fact that fear no longer exists.

One of the main pieces of advice for parents of children susceptible to any fears would be to carefully consider their behavior with the child. You need to understand that up to a certain age, a child is solely the “result” of your attitude, behavior, and upbringing. And if he upsets you with something, or it seems that he is doing everything to spite you, it means that you are somehow, unconsciously provoking this. Therefore, correction of a child’s behavior is directly related to changes in the behavior of adults.

Consultation for parents is the main goal of a psychologist to whom a child with a problem is brought. Unfortunately, it often happens when a mother comes to a child psychologist and demands to “cure” her child, while being sure that own behavior does not need correction.

The psychologist helps the child, but during the time between sessions, such a mother unconsciously nullifies all the progress made. At the same time, she rejects all the specialist’s recommendations, claiming that everything is fine with her, and her child’s problem needs to be solved. Therefore, if your child has a phobia that does not go away within 3-4 weeks, be sure to contact a psychologist, and the consultation will be useful for both the child and the parent.

In order to convey to parents useful information, psychologists working in children's institutions create special corners. Lately In some kindergartens, it has become fashionable to place so-called mobile folders in the rooms where parents are expecting their children. They are information materials for parents, staff and the children themselves. These are specially designed stands with useful tips psychologists and speech therapists.

The collection “Psychoanalysis of Childhood Fears” by Sigmund Freud includes an analysis of the phobia of a five-year-old boy - this is the case of little Hans - very famous in psychoanalytic circles. I will not go into details of the illness and cure, however, although Hans was a patient of Freud, I want to draw attention to the foreword by the author himself. He said that the described case was observed not by him personally, but by Hans’s father, who carried out all the treatment only with the support of a psychoanalyst.

Freud highly appreciates the merits of the boy's father and even expresses the idea that only biological father and could achieve such confessions from Hans. Coincidence tender feelings with scientific interest led to such important results, both for psychoanalysis in general and for the life of a particular boy.

Talks about a child's fears child psychologist European Medical Center Maria Zvegintseva in the next video

conclusions

Children's fears are natural age-related characteristics associated with understanding the world. If the child does not become fixated on the fear, and the fear is not present for more than a few weeks, then there is no need to worry. In case of protracted processes, you need to contact a psychologist. Techniques that help combat children’s fears include: art therapy, fairytale therapy, sand therapy. Parental consultation is the key to successfully getting rid of your child’s phobia.

Children's life is very rich and varied, inner world The child is actively developing and exploring the surrounding reality. Suddenly you began to notice how the child often began to be afraid to fall asleep alone, without a light or a night light, it seems to him that someone scary lives in the closet, even a harmless animal or insect can frighten the baby... This is not the entire list of manifestations of children's fears, And common reason contacting a child psychologist.

Based on my practice, I can say that nightmares, anxiety, and excessive worries of a child for no reason can negatively affect not only his psychological state V this moment, but also on the further development of personality, so it is extremely important to pay attention to the emotional state of the child in a timely manner.

The world is not always friendly and open to learning, so it is important to teach your child to effectively cope with his emotions. Anxious, vulnerable and emotional, impressionable children are more susceptible to the emergence of various fears, but at the same time, various fears can appear in any age and gender of the child.

According to psychological studies, every second child experiences fears at one age or another. Children aged two to nine years are most often affected by this. At this age, the child already sees a lot and knows a lot, but still does not understand everything; the unbridled childhood imagination is not yet restrained by real ideas about the world.

The range of children's fears is limited only by children's imagination; as you understand, it has no clear boundaries. Each fear is individual, and psychologists in such work pay attention not so much to their content, but to the cause, quantity and severity of these fears. Almost any object or event from the outside world can turn into something frightening for a child. For example, one six-year-old boy cannot be unaccompanied by adults in any classes, and his parents are forced to accompany him everywhere, and any proposal to remain without them causes the child to cry and panic. There is great discomfort for parents and a serious problem on the eve of starting school.

There are suggestions that one of the first emotions that appeared in primitive man was fear. He helped a person survive in the harsh conditions of an extremely aggressive world. Fears have great importance and in a child’s life: on the one hand, they protect against rash actions, and on the other hand, they prevent normal development personality. To prevent your child from becoming a hostage to his own phobias, allocate more time for joint games, creativity and walks.

Now let's talk about the reasons for the appearance of children's fears:

1.

The first reason is the most obvious; it lies in some unpleasant event that happened in the child’s life. For example, I got lost in a store and was scratched by a cat. Such fears are easier to correct than others, and if such events are not repeated, they often go away on their own. Not every child who is scratched by a cat or gets lost in a store develops a persistent fear that is noticeable to others.

2.

The second reason is intimidating upbringing. Surely every parent has used these “magic” methods of raising children at least once. “If you don’t go to bed, Baba Yaga will take you away!” or “Don’t make any noise, otherwise your uncle the driver will take you away with him!” Such statements have a negative impact on the child and cause negative reactions. I would not recommend scaring a child with someone else's uncle, Koshchei and Baba Yaga. Remember that fears appear very quickly, and getting rid of them will require a lot of time, as well as the efforts of all family members.

The third reason is related to individual characteristics child's character. The emergence and consolidation of fears is facilitated by such traits as anxiety, suspiciousness, pessimism, self-doubt, excessive dependence on other people, these can be parents, educators, teachers, then physical and mental immaturity, illness. All this is the background, the soil on which fears that arise in an extreme situation flourish lush color. Where do all these character traits come from? To a very large extent - from us, adults.

The fourth reason is children's fantasies. The fantasy world is a familiar habitat for children - preschoolers and primary schoolchildren. The imagination of our children has no limits; boundaries will appear a little later, when the child grows up. The baby populates the world with the creatures of his imagination, he thus structures it and makes it understandable to himself. And partly manageable. Only partly, because the creations of his fantasy tend to get out of control, become disobedient and therefore scary. Anyway baby how primitive, creates his own world and his own fears.

Fifth reason - anxious parents. Often parents themselves provoke the emergence of worries and fears in children. The child absorbs the emotional state of adults and feels anxious. Very often your child is afraid of something not on his own, but because his parents are afraid of it. This situation especially often happens in families where the mother or grandmother themselves have high level anxiety, which increases a hundredfold in relation to the baby. Especially if he is the only one, late or not too healthy. For such parents, the world around their child is filled with dangers: “Don’t pet the dog - it will bite”, “Don’t walk through puddles - you’ll get sick.” Repeated repetitions can also do their dirty work: anxious mothers often raise anxious children.

Reason six is ​​the presence of another, more serious disorder. If, along with fears, a child develops other behavioral disorders: aggressiveness, sleep disturbances, lethargy, tics or stuttering, he may have a neurosis, which needs to be diagnosed and treated by doctors. If the child’s fears are very unusual in their content and in the way they are manifested, if the child hears voices threatening him or sees something that others do not see, then this is a reason for serious concern and for immediate contact with a specialist.

How can you overcome childhood fears?

It is strictly forbidden to brush aside children’s fears, say that there is nothing terrible, and even more so, ridicule a fearful child. This behavior of adults only strengthens children's fears - they do not have to count on their help and protection. Moreover, such a reaction from parents can contribute to the formation of a feeling of personal inferiority - “After all, mom and dad, so big and brave, are not afraid of dogs, or Baba Yaga, or the dark, but I, small, helpless, will probably never become like that.” as fearless as my parents.”

If a situation that frightens a child cannot be avoided, try to create a more comfortable conditions. If he is afraid to fall asleep in the dark, leave the night light on with a dim light; if he is afraid to sleep alone, offer to sleep with him. soft toy, which is “strictly ordered” to protect its owner from all dangers.

You can invite the child to draw his experience and give it a funny and whimsical look, decorate it, or tear up the drawing with the depicted fear, the main thing is to verbally destroy it.

Fairy tale therapy

Reading fairy tales helps children understand the structure of the world and sort out conflicting feelings. Fairy tales must be selected or composed in such a way that they correspond to the children's problem. And they should be served in such a way that the child, experiencing the story, can feel brave and strong. For example, read “Pinocchio” to your child, the stories of Nosov, Dragunsky, and Andersen’s fairy tales.

Play therapy

In the game, it is much easier for children to cope with a traumatic situation, since fear appears to be significantly weakened, which means it is easier to overcome. Dramatization and dramatization games are great for helping to get rid of phobias, as well as overcome uncertainty, shyness and isolation.

Music therapy

Specially selected melodies are a source of positive experiences for children. Psychologists advise turning on classical music, since classical music will help eliminate depression, remove fears and stress. Include works by Tchaikovsky, Strauss's waltzes, and Prokofiev's symphonic tale Peter and the Wolf.

Timely identification of the problem and correct, adult behavior of parents will definitely lead to positive results!